When Hermione opened her eyes, the light that was passing through the small gap of the curtains, was too bright. She blinked and felt her stomach squeezing tightly. The morning she had feared so much, had come. She was scared to move…she was afraid to learn if he was still sleeping behind her or if he had run away, before the break of dawn. She concentrated hard in an attempt to hear his breathing.

There was only silence.

Her heart weakened as the complete silence of the room became a testament to her loneliness. Resentment begun overflowing her and the tears followed fast. She willed herself to cry soundlessly, but it was impossible to silence her moans. Her palms spread over her lower stomach and her knees came up to her chest. She stayed there trembling from head to toes, lamenting the loss of so much love.

Last night when they fell asleep together she felt a small ray of hope that he wouldn't disappear in the morning. That maybe he'd give them one more chance. Perhaps offer her the opportunity to convince him that he was not alone in this daunting endeavor. That maybe together they could soothe each other's doubts and battle each other's demons. Possibly try to make something out of this relationship, which seemed like a lost cause.

Yet now, this absolute desolation, this unkind solitude were ripping her soul apart. She was too frail to combat the ache of his rejection. The only thing she sought now was to gather her pieces and go home with Harry and Ginny. She didn't wish to go back to Severus' abode in order to get her stuff. Maybe Ginny could do that for her.

Going to her parents was out of the question too. The prospect of facing them with this chaos was shattering. The trouble she went through in order to restore their memories and explain what took place during the war, felt so inconsequential now in the face of this new agonizing trial. What would her parents say when they learned that not only had she fallen for a former Professor, but that she was also pregnant by him …and out of a relationship…never mind something more permanent? Her mother would be repulsed to find out about the unscrupulous marriage law. She'd become livid if she ever found out that Hermione grew several years older in order to save the man she loved…and that man abandoned her and the baby. She didn't even want to consider the reaction of her pious father. The usually serene dentist would probably find a rifle and try to hunt down Severus for destroying his daughter.

No….

She couldn't go to them…she couldn't tell them anything. She was not ready to face an emotional confrontation with her family at this moment. The only ones who could take her in was Harry and Ginny. As for him….as for Severus….the thought of him alone was enough to unravel every bloody yarn of her heart. The only thing she wanted was to flee away from him and the pain he was offering so thoughtlessly. She clutched the pillow securely and released a muffled howl of anguish upon it. It took her unending tears to bare her heart…but after that sleep came quickly. A blessing to her tortured soul.

-.-

She woke up when the sky was filled with the impressive orange hues of a beautiful sundown. This time she was not alone. Ginny was sitting in a chair next to her and Harry was standing behind his wife.

Hermione blinked coldly. She was in no mood to talk to them, not even to ask them to take her home. It was if all that crying had emptied her of all emotion. Now the only thing she wanted was to be alone…away from everybody.

Ginny reached out and stroked her hand. "Good evening honey."

Hermione closed her eyes. The fatigue she felt was more emotional and less physical. "Hi…" she grumbled. The words ached her injured throat.

"Are you okay?" Harry frowned.

She shook her head gloomily. "No Harry I am not. I want to leave the hospital."

Ginny frowned. "What are you talking about? You cannot leave yet love. Miriam hasn't signed your release papers."

Hermione pushed with her elbow and sat up. Her whole body was aching and her head was pounding hard. "I don't want to stay here anymore. I want to leave." She murmured as her feet touched the cold floor. A frozen shiver tickled her spine, making her shudder.

"But you are still ill Mione. We haven't managed to reverse your ageing process and Miriam needs to watch the progress of the pregnancy." Ginny looked carefully at Harry above her shoulder.

Hermione pushed herself up and instantly her knees unlocked. She grabbed the headboard to steady herself. "I want to get out of here now." She repeated emphatically.

Ginny hurried to hold her and Harry walked around the chair to seize Hermione's elbow. "What do you think you are doing?"

She forced herself to look at him. "I am getting out of here Harry. Whether you escort me or not…whether Miriam releases me or not. I am leaving and no one can stop me."

"You can barely stand my love. What you are doing might hurt the baby." Ginny tried to reason.

"Don't try to guilt trip me!" Hermione snapped and pulled her hand free with great difficulty. The last thing she wanted was to stay here in order to be visited during the night by the ghost of Severus. She walked unsteadily towards the cupboard and opened it.

Ginny came up behind her. "Hermione…wait."

"I am not staying in this place a moment longer Ginny. Can I come to your house?" -Hermione looked at her friend above her shoulder- "Please?"

Ginny turned to Harry truly bewildered. "Of course, but before we leave we must speak with Miriam."

Hermione took out a pair of jeans and a t-shirt from the rack. "If you cannot help me the way I want to, then I don't need your help. Stay here and talk with Miriam as long as you wish. I am going." She said in a monotone and pulled the nightgown over her head, without any care if Harry was looking.

Ginny grasped her shoulders. "Harry tell her something! She is pregnant!"

Harry who had his back turned to them, threw his hands in the air. "What do you want me to do? Arrest her?"

"If need be yes!" Ginny snapped.

Hermione pulled away from Ginny and put on the t-shirt with a groan of pain. "You can stay and argue as long as you like, I am not obliged to hear you." She spat and felt the bitterness suffocating her. She put on the jeans with far greater effort.

Ginny grasped Hermione's shoulder and turned her around. "I am coming with you. You are not leaving alone. We will go speak first to Miriam and if she allows you to go, then I will take you home with me."

Hermione's eyes gleamed with fresh tears. "You don't understand Ginny. I cannot rely on what Miriam says. I will not stay here another night. I will not allow him to spy on me from the darkness and offer me crumbs of his attention only to disappear in the morning. I did everything I could for him, now I will disappear and try to do the best I can for myself."

At those words Ginny's eyes watered. "What are you talking about?"

"Severus." Hermione murmured and her face paled. She swayed on her feet and Ginny hurried to support her.

"You can barely stand." She said with eyes that bespoke of immense worry.

Hermione's hand curled around Ginny's bicep. "Can you take me to your house now?"

Ginny looked at Harry who was still looking towards the wall discreetly. "Harry?"

"We shall all speak to Miriam and ask her permission. Then we leave." Harry turned around and his features were solemn.

Hermione humphed and pushed Ginny away wordlessly. Then she staggered towards the door. Harry was upon her before she could open it. "Not like this Hermione. You aren't leaving like this. Not when you have a baby in you that needs as much medical attention as you do."

Hermione was a shrewd woman. She knew when it was unwise to try her stubbornness against Harry. She knew when to take a step back in order to get her way. She looked up to him coldly and her silence spread like a heavy blanket in the room. When she spoke again her voice had aged somehow. "Fine. You go and ask Miriam. I will stay here with Ginny and wait." She said stonily.

Harry's brows creased in disbelief for a few moments.

Hermione took several steps back until the back of her knees where caught by the chair. She sat on it heavily and looked up at Harry. "I am not going to leave Harry unless Miriam allows me. That is what you wanted, right? So go and ask her…don't torment me anymore. Please."

Harry looked at his wife who gave him a reluctant nod. He opened the door and left quickly. Ginny turned to Hermione. "Are you alright? You look dreadfully pale."

Hermione knew that ward 49 was protected against apparition. The only chance to get out of here was the muggle way. "I am dizzy Ginny." She closed her eyes.

Ginny knelt and held Hermione's hands. "You feel so cold."

"I am cold." Hermione nodded weakly.

"Maybe we need to ask Miriam to put you back on an IV. You look so weak. Do you want me to bring you a blanket?" Ginny asked.

Hermione nodded and with her eyes closed she directed her magic towards the cupboard before Ginny went there. "Yes, please can you?"

Ginny opened the cupboard and frowned. "Hey that is peculiar. They usually have a lot of extra covers in these things."

Hermione leaned her head back. "I don't know." She sounded as exhausted as she felt.

Ginny picked up the blanket from the bed and threw it over Hermione's shoulders. "Is this better?" She rubbed her hands vigorously.

Hermione gave her a sad smile. "Not really." She said trembling. Her teeth were rattling so hard that it was painful. She didn't need to act the part of being frozen.

Ginny frowned around the room. "There is nothing else in here to cover you with."

"It is okay." Hermione murmured with closed eyes.

Ginny looked at her tensely for several moments and then turned towards the door. "Don't go anywhere. I am going to the next room to get some more blankets." She pointed at Hermione with her hand warningly.

Hermione shook her head. "Alright."

A long pause came from Ginny as she stood there with her hand upon the handle, trying to decide, before she opened the door and went out. Hermione cracked her eyes open and quickly threw the blanket away. With unsteady steps she walked to the cupboard and put on her old pair of sneakers. Then she tied her hair back into a loose ponytail and opened the side drawer that had all her private things. She scrambled around and found her wand. Then she cracked the door open again and looked at the corridor. It wasn't going to remain empty for long. Ginny would soon return.

Hermione closed the door behind her slowly. Then she tiptoed towards the stairwell and used her wand to deactivate the wards that locked the stair-doors. The lock clicked way too loudly for the silence of the corridor. With quivering legs and icy hands she staggered down the stairs, hoping that her ability to hide her trace hadn't vanished along with her ability to sustain any sort of body heat.

She didn't try to exit at the ground floor, instead she went down to the second basement which was used as storage. Hoping that she looked presentable enough she grabbed one of the metal dossiers closest to her and sauntered as steadily as she could towards the back exit.

She was met with a couple of workers who didn't give her any notice and was elated to see the back door was wide open. When she got out, she threw the dossier away and forced her legs to go faster. She didn't know where she was running to, only that she wanted to flee from everything, but above all from him. It mattered little to her, how feeble she felt or how cold. She didn't want to be here tonight. She didn't want to give him the chance to break her heart once more. This time she became a fugitive not from the law, but from another heartache. The adrenaline that fed her original flee from the hospital begun fading away as she moved further away. Despite of how unsteady her legs were, she trudged on, but not long after it was her lungs that betrayed her. She stopped panting in the middle of the empty street and caught the wall for support. Her chest was on fire and her heart was drumming hard in her ears. She closed her eyes and made an effort to calm down. She looked towards the sky that was clear of any clouds for the first time since this nightmare begun. It was the sky that he cleared up with his ultimate sacrifice…a sacrifice that she happily undid by aging at least a decade. Her hand planed over her lower stomach protectively. She felt the tears burning her eyes anew and her bottom lip quivered.

That is when a large hand wrapped around her wrist. She felt her heart coming to a screeching halt. "What have you done you stupid girl?"

The shock of hearing his voice, rendered her speechless. She turned to him stunned.

He was scowling down at her, his imposing figure as always overtaking the environment. "What are you doing out here all alone?"

She looked at his half open shirt that was hanging out of his pants and the dark stubble on his face. The scent of strong alcohol escaped from his mouth. His disheveled image made her heart race. "I am running away. What the hell are you doing here?" She felt her heart pounding in terror.

"I followed your trace the moment you left the hospital." He frowned.

A small thread of amusement tried to overtake her original shock. Of course he was able to trace her. Had she been stupid enough to believe that she'd escape his hawk eye with her stupid tricks? "Did I pull you out of your misery? What were you doing? Drowning your cowardice in whiskey?" She exhaled hard.

"What kind of question is that?" His black brows weaved in confusion.

Her eyes seared through his. "You reek of alcohol! Get your hands off me!"

"Not unless you tell me what has gotten into you all of a sudden." His brow arched slowly.

She pulled her hand hard, but he didn't release it. "All of a sudden?"

His eyes clouded, but he didn't answer.

"All of a sudden?" -She repeated heatedly- "Let me go!"

He tilted his head. "I won't unless you tell me why you left the hospital. I came in the room and saw Mrs. Potter yelling in panic. Mr. Potter has raised all the alerts on your trace and the whole hospital was looking for you."

A small shred of stupid doubt entered her mind. "What were you doing at the hospital?"

"I was on my way to see you." He replied solemnly.

"It isn't night yet. What hell froze over? Is it because you are drunk as a skunk?" She humphed dryly.

"Don't do this." He said between gritted teeth.

"You mean to tell me that all of a sudden you decided to stop hiding from me?" Hermione's lips curled up in a bitter smile.

"Hermione stop." He scowled.

"I hid my damned trace." -She spat at him vehemently- "Exactly because I didn't want to be found by you."

He shook his head slightly. "We are connected. Your trace will always be visible to me."

She tried to free her hand again to no avail. "Then you'd better do something to stop this damned connection between us Severus. I do not wish to be traced by you anymore…"

His eyes bore deeply into hers. "What are you saying?"

"Exactly what you are hearing. I don't want to have your Eleventh key on me anymore." Her heart pounded hard when she uttered these words.

His eyes burned through hers for several tense moments.

She flared her shoulders. "Now let go of my arm."

His fingers slowly opened up, releasing her. "Why are you doing this?"

"What reasons do you wish me to give you Severus? We have said to each other everything that needed to be said yesterday. I expected nothing less than the truth from you and you delivered. You are hate the idea of fatherhood and your need to flee is painfully obvious. What do you wish for me to do? Stay in that damned place in order for you to gawk at me during the night? I left because this time it is I who needs to flee away from you. I cannot handle this anymore Severus. Even though it is breaking my heart, I don't intend to lock you down. As I told you yesterday you are free to leave…so let me be free to leave too." She hated herself for being unable to swallow her burning tears as they rolled down her cheeks.

"Is this some kind of childish revenge against me? You are endangering yourself and the baby with this imprudent behavior." His profound voice came to undo her.

She shook her head fervently. "The world doesn't revolved around you Severus Snape. You have no idea how I feel right now. You think the baby is endangered by me leaving the hospital? Do you think my broken heart will help it thrive? I cannot take this anymore…forgive me…"

He took a step closer and instantly her body magnetized towards his. "You look pale as a ghost and you are frozen." His voice lost all its angry authority as he lifted his hand towards her cheek.

His fingers had barely touched her before she pulled back sharply. "I don't want you to touch me." She snapped and turned her back to him intending to leave.

His hand fell heavy on her shoulder and turned her around. "Stop Hermione in the name of sanity. You cannot allow what is happening between us to burden your health."

"Don't play saint to me for you are not one." -Her condemning eyes burnt upon his. She pulled her sleeve up- "Remove this from me!" She commanded with a shattered voice.

His dark eyes fell on the ancient rune and then returned heavily on hers. He remained silent, but she could see the tension brewing in him.

She grabbed his hand and pressed it on the rune. "Remove it!" She barked.

He shook his head gently. "I won't…."

She felt her heart seething. "Do it!" She grumbled and threw a punch on his hand.

He closed his eyes. "I will not remove this ancient gift of love from you or the baby Hermione. Ask me of anything else…but not that."

She felt her whole body shaking with adrenaline. "How dare you!" She hissed.

When he opened his eyes she saw the naked pain appearing behind the usual coldness. "Please come with me back at the hospital."

Her jawline flexed. "To do what? Lay in bed while you hide from the world and from me? It's over Severus….I don't intend to stay in London. I don't know where I am going to go, but I want you to withdraw the power you have over me. I don't want you to be able to trace me anymore."

His fingers tightened upon her skin. "So you intent to disappear…and take my child away too?"

Her eyes fell stonily upon him. "This is the first time I am hearing some tone of fear in your voice at the prospect of losing the baby."

His eyes narrowed on her.

"You admitted to hating fatherhood not only to that atrocious woman in the Underworld, but also to me. You run away from me the moment you found out I was pregnant. Do you wish to convince me that you suddenly care about this child?" She retorted.

"No matter how low your opinion might be of me, believe me Hermione… I care for you and the baby. Wasn't it enough that you risked your life to save mine? Now you risk both your lives for this foolishness?" The quietness of his voice reverberated through her spine, a complete contrast to her boiling emotions.

"I did everything I could to bring you back! You can hate me all you want for it, but I'd never change what I did! Now remove that damned rune from my arm!" She clawed his hand with her nails hard.

"I'll never do it. This is my blessing to this child….to you." His eyes watered.

"Our blessing would have been your presence by our side, not your magic….get it off of me!" Her nails dag into his skin so hard that she drew blood.

He hissed, but his gaze didn't falter. "Make me!"

It was as if some instinctive part of her mind took over and lifted up her hand. She slapped him across the face so violently that the sound shocked her. "You bloody bastard!" She thundered.

His eyes pierced through hers. He didn't speak and he didn't recoil.

The need to make him leave, like he had done so many times in the past resurfaced. Her hand delivered another brutal blow to his other cheek. "Take it off of me!" She shouted with blind rage.

He turned to her once more, with enviable self-control. Both his cheeks where on fire and tears were pooling in his eyes. "No…" He said quietly.

"Run away and hide like you always do…leave and let me live!" She shouted and lifted her hand to strike him again.

That is when his hand caught hers in the air. "Hermione stop." His voice was too quiet…too soft for her bruised nerves.

She threw a punch on his chest, needing to push him back. "You died in my arms you bloody fool….you just faded away….I can't…." She moaned at the verge of losing her mind. She made another attempt to get released, but he enfolded her into his arms before she had the chance.

"Calm down please." He spoke quietly close to her ear.

Her inability to move made her fury singe through every single cell in her body. The eruption came in the form of a feral cry that resounded across the street. Then before she knew it they disapparated together, melting into one magical medley that she couldn't get away from.

-.-

They apparated in the middle of his living room. He was holding her tightly, feeling her chest undulating with her sobs. "I never wanted this…." She gritted her jawline in an effort to stop her body from shaking so hard.

He closed his eyes and leaned his cheek on top of her head.

"I never wanted to fall for you…I never wanted to get pregnant by you…I never wanted to feel this despair for you…for me…for everything…." Her voice was coarse, her words fragments of her racing thoughts.

"I never wished to put you in this predicament." He whispered heartbroken.

"Yet you did…or maybe I did it to myself." –She took a quivering inhalation and pushed him back- "It matters not how we ended up in this mess Severus. I want this…whatever it is we have between us to be over."

His hands fell empty to his sides.

"I am giving you exactly what you wanted ever since you found out my pregnancy. Now you can leave without any remorse. You don't have to force yourself to visit me in the darkness. You don't need to hide like the eternal spy. You don't have to run away…you can stay here…" –She looked around with a bitter smile- "Here in your home. Safe in your loneliness, surrounded by your books, your magic and your cauldrons."

His eyelids closed heavily as her words pushed a cold dagger through the folds of his heart. "And you are going to leave."

"Yes." Came the flat answer.

"Where will you go?" He whispered.

She averted her eyes and looked at her shaking hands as tears pooled at the side of her lips. "Maybe Australia…my parents…maybe Ireland, maybe Greenland…somewhere far…where no one can reach me."

"Not even me?" The shadows gathered around his eyes.

When she looked up her, he witnessed the suffering in her eyes. "Especially not you."

His gaze suddenly lost its previous flame.

She sniffled and smiled bitterly. "I could have given everything to try and have a relationship with you Severus. God knows I love you and that will never change, no matter how far away I go. Nevertheless I will not remain here to implore for a few scraps of care from you. I will not settle for anything less than an honest effort on your part. You wish for freedom so much and I am giving it to you. What more do you want?"

He felt his throat painfully tight. The words came out with difficulty. "Not to take yourself and the baby away from me…."

She run her fingers through her hair. "So you wish us to remain in London so you can spy on us as you please?" She humphed.

His black eyes were penetrating. "This is unfair…"

"To whom?" –Her smile was hostile- "To you? I don't care about treating you justly Severus. You run away without telling me I am pregnant….you wanted to give me that damned vault key as if your gold could substitute your absence and now you dread me forsaking you?"

He closed his eyes with a pulsating breath.

"You have one peculiar sense of fairness which I cannot comprehend. You don't want me to leave, while it is so easy for you to leave me." She turned her back to him, unwilling to meet the deep intensity of his dark eyes anymore.

"Easy?" He inhaled sharply.

She crossed her arms.

"You think all of this is easy on me?"

She didn't answer, but he could hear her soft sniffling.

"You believe that everything I did was easy?" His voice became thick with suppressed emotions.

She shook her head wordlessly.

"Look at me." His voice dropped.

She didn't.

"Hermione look at me!" The command was clear.

She remained frozen with her back to him.

His heavy hand fell on her shoulder. He turned her around and the moment he saw all those tears flooding her face, his anger dissipated in a pool of sorrow. He wanted to tell her so much, but only two words came out. "Forgive me…" he whispered.

She closed her eyes. "Deactivate the Eleventh Key Severus and let me go."

He felt a cold hand wrapping around his throat, choking him.

"I don't want anything less than the whole of you." Her voice became hard as steel.

"The baby…." He stumbled at the verge of tears.

"I will make sure to arrange meetings with you. We shall do everything the proper way. I won't alienate you from your child. If you wish to be in their lives, you will. Now…please…" –She lifted her sleeve again- "Take this thing off of me…I don't want to feel you anymore." At those words her voice broke and an unbidden moan of pain escaped her parted lips.

He lifted his hand, totally numb and touched her forearm. Then his fingers glided down to her wrist instead of upwards to the rune. He lifted her hand and made her palm touch his temple. "I will do as you wish, if you do one thing for me." He exhaled heavily. He was dithering between the need to make her understand and his dread of letting her see the truth.

Her regard was austere. "I don't want any more games from you master."

His heart palpitated as he took her other hand and led it to his cheek. "No more games Hermione. Just the truth this time."

Her brows wavered. "The truth?"

"The only truth…." He closed his eyes with a failing heart.

Her inhalation was shaky as were her frozen fingers. She seemed afraid to speak.

"Will you take a look inside my mind Hermione?" He whispered as he felt his very soul sliding effortlessly into the darkest depths of a bottomless ocean he hadn't visited in ages.

She took a step closer to him quietly.

His heart thudded fiercely against his chest. "Are you afraid to do so?" He asked softly.

She shook her head and he saw a clarity in her eyes that he envied at that moment.

His eyelids closed heavily and his brows furrowed as he pushed open the locked doors of his mind, for the first time since forever. So many gifted wizards had tried to pry those gates open over so many decades and all had failed. This was the first time in his life that he was willingly allowing someone to take a dive into the most painful memories of his childhood and he prayed to all the Gods of the Universe that she wouldn't hate him for what he was about to show her.

-.-

Hermione heard a loud bang at the wall behind her head. She inhaled sharply and her eyes flew open. Her brows wrinkled in doubt as she looked at the dull walls of a small room that hadn't seen before. The wall opposite the bed had a few sparse shelves that carried some schoolbooks she recognized from her days in Hogwarts, even though these seemed to be older editions. Amongst them she saw a few muggle tittles that seemed so out of place. They seemed too cheerful for this gloomy place.

She turned her head and looked at the side-table. It had a small rusty lamp on it and a half open book. Her brows knotted as she gazed at the title. "Basic concepts of Alchemy." She reached out to take it, but then inhaled sharply and drew her hand back shocked. Her mouth dropped open as she twisted her wrist around, mesmerized by the small dirty hand in front of her. The nails were cut very short, but the digits were long and even though the skin was smooth, she could see hints of the veins under it. This was the hand of a child…but a hand that has seen work nonetheless.

Another harder knock followed by a stifled moan, made her heart pick up speed. She turned towards the closed door. It seemed as equally grey as the rest of the room, its wood cracked. She sat up and pushed back the threadbare blanket. Less surprised this time she gazed down at her half-naked body. Her hand touched the smooth skin of a lean stomach. Then her fingers reached up to her chest which was completely flat.

This was the body of a young boy. She felt the fiery blood of his youth running through her veins…invigorating her. Another thump made her jump up with an inhalation of fear, which was a little too deep to belong to her. She pushed the covers back and stood up slowly. She grabbed the side table to steady herself as the unexpectedly low height made her slightly dizzy. That is when a series of thumps and bangs were followed by a crash and an ear-splitting scream. Her heart erupted in terror and begun galloping. Suddenly her chest contracted, her hands numbed down and panic clawed her insides.

She made an attempt to calm herself down…to calm the boy down, to control the hard undulation of her chest, the tightening of her stomach, the nausea that overpowered her, the coldness of her extremities and above all the thudding of her poor heart that seemed ready to pop. That is when another crash, even louder than before was followed by a scream that made the boy's heart halt. "Stop Tobias! Please stop!"

Her inability to think clearly was followed by a sudden rush of adrenaline, which made her stumble to the door and throw it open. Gasping for breath she hurled herself down a corridor that seemed too dirty, too abandoned and too scarred by the terrors that lay behind the closed door at the end of it. Yells of fury and screams of pain were echoing behind it. Hermione curled in on herself and wished the boy to turn away…to stay away from that door! She tried to use her hands in order to grab the walls and stop him, but she was unable. The poor boy's heart was beating faster, while the screams of agony became louder.

When her hand touched the handle she felt her heart stopping. There was nothing good behind that door…nothing holy. However much she wished to close her eyes, they remained wide open and pooling with tears… because they didn't belong to her. So she saw the handle turning and the door opening slowly to reveal a man and a woman struggling in front of a dining table. All the content of their dinner was spread on the floor. The glasses and plates broken, the chairs overturned, two frames with faded photographs in them cracked. The TV was on static and a teapot was screaming on top of the stove. Hermione felt mouth opening up wide with a silent scream of terror when she saw the man throwing a vicious punch at the woman's stomach.

Hermione run towards the woman and fell upon her protectively. "Leave mom alone you bastard!" She heard her voice, much deeper than expected…but still a voice belonging to a poor child. The woman curled in under Hermione, trying to hide herself as the man stopped over them. A huge mass of rage waiting to destroy them. Hermione's body trembled as she embraced the woman and whispered in her ear. "I am here…he cannot hurt you anymore."

Hermione held her breath as she counted inwards…waiting for the strike to fall. Suddenly she heard the heavy steps of the man walking away from them. Then her gaze fell with dread upon the woman's bruised face. Both her eyes were shut and a dark hue was already forming around them. Her cheek was torn and so was her forehead. The left side of her jawline has already swollen to twice its original size and blood was trickling from her lips. "Come on mom, you have to get up…come on." She said and tried to steady the woman. However she lost her footing and placed her hand on the floor to stop herself from falling. That is when she felt a warm sticky liquid spreading in her palm. She looked down and felt her breath seizing. A thick line of blood was coming out from between the woman's shaking thighs. Suddenly a pair of cold hands was upon her face pushing her away. "Go away my love. He is going to kill you…leave Severus!"

Hermione's heart gave a small terrified pulse and then stopped again. "I am not leaving you mom!" The boy said and tried to help his mother up. That is when Hermione heard the loud steps of the father returning. She barely had the time to turn around when she felt an excruciating pain tearing her back to threads. The yell that came out of her chest was abysmal.

"Haven't I told you to stay in your room you little filth!? What are you going to do this time to save your mom, you vile beast!? Are you going to use your hocus pocus on me!?"

Even though her back felt as if someone had taken a knife and cut out thick pieces from it, she experienced an unforeseen surge of power that came from the boy's chest and took her by surprise. The need to release that immense energy made her heart palpitate. She barely had the time to enjoy the outpouring of this incomparable magical force, the likes of which she had never experienced before, when the whip fell on her back again.

She arched with a cry that tore her throat apart and felt her body in pure agony. Why wasn't he releasing this colossal power against his father? Why was he remaining idle in front of this vicious cruelty? The questions got stuck in her mind as the whip fell upon her again and again for what seemed like an eternity. Repeatedly…relentlessly…remorselessly. Tearing her skin and her soul apart as she clung onto the equally hurt mother. Trying to offer protection and draw some comfort from Eileen Prince as Severus' young body was being whipped to an inch of his life. Strike after strike he received more bravely than she would have ever done in real life, able to suppress a magical power that would have scared even the most experienced wizards of their time.

As the blood of young Severus trickled between his legs and joined that of his mother Hermione felt the world fading slowly away. The voice of the man penetrated that blessed darkness with its violent totality. "You want to save your mother you unnatural beast? Try it! Try to hex me and I shall kill both of you, like I killed the other beast she is carrying in her loins! She will not give birth to another monster do you hear me!? This abomination ends with you! It ends here with you!"

Hermione felt her hands falling empty at her sides and the pain from the repeated slashes becoming more and more distant as the darkness finally shrouded her.

-.-

She inhaled deeply and opened her eyes. Her hands were shaking under his. She gazed at his closed eyes and her heart filled with unbearable sorrow.

Her shuddering breath made him open his eyes slowly. "You saw."

The depth of his voice made her whole body spasm. "You…told me those wounds on your back…that you have caused them to yourself." She stuttered feeling lost.

"I caused them to myself by denying to leave the side of my mother." The deep melancholy of his voice brought tears to her eyes.

She pressed her hands on his temples. "She was…pregnant…"

He looked down with a soft nod.

"The baby?" Hermione muttered and drew his gaze up to her again.

He shook his head in sorrow.

Hermione moaned and cupped her mouth. She didn't know what to do with all the grief that was overflowing her heart. "I am so sorry…" She murmured faintly.

A ghostly smile appeared on his lips.

Time froze as her teary eyes borrowed into the deep sadness of his. Then she pulled him upon her bosom zealously. "I am so sorry…so sorry."

His arms came around her with equal fervor.

She traced his cheek with her lips, as her eyelids closed heavily. "Severus…I didn't know…"

He exhaled hard and leaned his forehead upon hers. "No one does. I wanted you to see it…and maybe understand."

She held her breath.

"Understand why it is so hard for me…" He whispered.

"It isn't that you hate fatherhood…" -Her fingers twisted through his long hair. He was frozen in her arms, but she felt the tautness of his body, pulsating under her fingertips- "You fear it."

The exhalation that left his chest seemed to deflate his shoulders. His arms tightened around her almost possessively. "I am terrified of it."

"I know…" She whispered softly.

When his embrace became more demanding her heart elated. She happily allowed him the time he needed to pursue this close proximity with her.

When she felt his breathing calming down and his body loosening up once more she pulled back and gazed at him with so much care. "I felt such an overwhelming power in you…. A strength that I fear no one has ever witnessed apart from maybe your father? He was terrified of this power, wasn't he?" Her voice was quiet as she tried to tiptoe gently around this painful experience.

"My mother lost the baby because of me...because I existed...because I used that magic against my father in the past." He answered quietly.

"Is that why you didn't use it the time you shared with me?" She murmured softly.

"He would have killed her and all that was because of me." He frowned.

"How can you blame yourself for this mess? You were but an innocent child, entrapped in a vicious circle of cruelty." She looked genially confused

He pressed his forehead ardently upon hers.

"You were an innocent child suffering unspeakable abuse...you were not the instigator of that abuse. You did what you had to do to protect yourself." She shook him, needing to make him understand.

He didn't speak.

Hermione pulled his head up gently. "You were not at fault for what happened to your mother Severus. These dark thoughts must be uprooted from your mind...one violent memory at a time."

His eyes teared up as his fingers offered a feathery touch at her flushed cheeks gently. "My beautiful Hermione. Driven by fairness even for the past lives of others."

"I can battle your inner demons, if you allow me." She frowned.

"They are mine to battle, not yours." His voice hardened.

"I can hold your hand while you do it …" –She visibly stumbled as her eyes searched for his- "…if you are willing to let me try."

"Hermione it petrifies me to create a family, because the only family I ever knew is what you saw." His features plunged at these heavy words.

"No my love oh...no…" She stroked his cheeks.

"I have my father's blood in me..." -He rejoined hoarsely. She felt her heart missing a beat- "But I am not him..." He exhaled after a few tense moments.

She pulled him in an ardent hug. "You have nothing of that beast in you. Stop Severus!" She gritted her teeth angry at how tormented this man's heart truly was.

"Yet the darkness in me...my choices...Voldemort...the dark arts...the underworld. My magic, that strength you so admired, it derives from that darkness Hermione." His eyes were somber.

"The magic I felt inside your young body was unconditionally gorgeous. That incomparable strength derived from your heart, which doesn't have a single malicious thread in it. How can you fear the darkness...when you are hiding such a beautiful gift within you?" Her eyes filled with all the love she felt for him.

He looked up to her in misery.

"You were just a kid when you had that volcano burning inside you. I wonder how much that strength has grown now?" She smiled and kissed his nose gently.

He closed his eyes and drew her in tightly.

"The world is right to think that you are much more powerful than you have ever shown. I felt that strength and I will never forget it. No wonder the sixth level bowed to your will. You shouldn't fear your magic, you should worship it." She murmured overwhelmed.

"Hermione..." He whispered.

"I am so sorry your mother lost her baby in this inhumane manner...but my love you are not your father..." She pulled back and searched for his eyes.

His strong body shuddered in her arms.

"I have only felt affection and protection from you even during the most controversial circumstances. I do not fear you. I love you...I love your fears and your strengths and I long to love every part that you wish to show me." Her voice was embellished with so much yearning.

Another stronger tremor shook his body.

"I will forever hate what I witnessed today through your eyes, but it won't scare me away. I am here to hold your hand whenever that nightmare takes over…" -She stopped breathless for a moment and felt a tear trickling down her nose- "…Unless you showed me all that in order to explain to me why you still have to leave."

He drew back and looked at her deeply. His hand cupped her cheek and his finger trapped those tears. "I cannot let you go Hermione." He murmured.

"You cannot?" Her smile was sad.

"I don't want to let you go." Came the unhindered answer.

"Tell me why...I want to hear it." She gasped.

The tension she saw in his gaze was so thick with longing that she felt her soul melting. Her face flooded with tears as she gave him a soft nod, urging him to say it. One of his hands came up and cupped her cheek gently. His dark eyes fell on her lips for what felt like an eternity. Then his free hand slithered tenderly through the hair on the back of her head. The shudder his touch caused, made her breath catch. Her eyelids fluttered as he leaned close to her mouth. "Because no matter how much I fear the future Hermione…I love you even more." His words came as an exhalation of deliverance to envelop her poor bruised heart.

She inhaled sharply as his lips touched hers and for the first moment since forever she felt all her demons withdrawing their talons from her mind. She pressed her mouth on his with possessive fierceness, tasting their joined tears. "Say it again." She whispered.

"I love you Hermione…like I have never loved anyone else." His lips moved above hers tenderly, offering those words into her very depths.

Her heart was floating somewhere between reason and insanity. "More…" She begged and demanded a deeper kiss from him.

"I cannot stop loving you…I will not stop loving you, no matter what happens." He whispered and reciprocated her kiss with the experienced sensuality that always loosened up her knees. As his lips fondled hers, his touch extended inwards to her very heart that opened up for him like a flower would under the first drops of rain after a decade of drought. She fell under his spell easily, forgetting for a moment the terror she experienced when she was taken in the Underworld and the anguish that ripped her to pieces when he died in her arms. She forgot the desolation she felt when he abandoned her at the hospital and the hopelessness of knowing that he didn't wish to father their child. She pushed back the terrifying memories of the abuse he had suffered when he was a kid. The only thing that mattered to her at that moment was him…his loving touch, but above all the words he had told her.

When she was all but a dazed puddle of warm liquid in his hands, he drew back with a frown and caressed her forehead. "I cannot let you go ….I don't want you to go Hermione." He said softly.

She looked at him through hazy eyes. "What if I still want to leave?"

His eyes were filled with so many unconcealed emotions. "I will follow you."

"And if I run away from you again?" She smiled as her fingers caressed his jawline.

"I will find you again and again…" He frowned towards her lips.

"What if I don't want to be found?" She nudged his chin with her nose tenderly.

"I will find you nonetheless." He gave a gentle peck on her nose.

"So you will make it impossible for me to get rid of you?" She raised her brow.

"Indubitably." His lips curled up into a faded smile.

"Then I have no choice but to abandon myself to this fate…" -She closed her eyes and stroked her cheek on his, feeling his stumble rough upon her skin- "Of having to be burdened by the whole of you …including all your fears." She exhaled upon his neck.

His long fingers got buried into her hair. "And I will ask your forgiveness for my shortcomings."

She frowned and pulled back. The seriousness of his features made her heart smile. Her palm touched the center of his chest and she pulled him down until their lips touched. "I don't want your apologies Professor…I just want you to walk by my side."

When he closed his eyes, a few more tears escaped. "I will Hermione…always."

Her finger wiped them away. "I love you." She whispered with a smile and for the first time in her life she felt as if she was exactly where she belonged.

-.-