iv.
"I think Ichi-nii and Orihime are having trouble in paradise," Karin says, out of the blue, on the walk towards her home.
"What?" Toushirou looks at her, concerned.
"It's just a feeling I've had," Karin admits, folding her arms over her chest, head downcast and looking worried. "I don't know. Maybe it's nothing."
"Karin…"
"Yuzu thinks I'm being paranoid, and she might have a point," Karin mumbles, shoes scuffing against the pavement. "Sorry, Toushirou, I know you're not interested in stuff like this, but I… I don't know who else to talk to about this."
"It's alright," Toushirou says. If Karin needs to vent, he'd rather listen to her than have her bottle up her concern. Who knows, maybe he can even help? "Are they having a fight?"
"No, I don't think so," Karin shakes her head. She's startlingly perceptive, a fact which a lot of people often overlook, partly because she tends to hold herself back. But ask the right questions, and Toushirou finds that she can be very forthcoming. Karin sighs, looking up to the sky. "It's not like they're unhappy, even! It's not really 'trouble in paradise'. It's just… I'm just worried about them."
"I see," Toushirou says. Surely there can be something he can do ease Karin's mind. "Do you want me to get Matsumoto to investigate? She's rather close to Inoue, I'm sure she could find out if there's anything wrong…"
"No, that's okay," Karin says, smiling a little. "I appreciate the thought, Toushirou, but I don't think that's necessary."
"No?"
"No. Like I said, I'm probably worried over nothing," Karin tries to pass it off with a laugh, but it sound fake, and she can't hide her discontent. "Just being cynical ol' me."
"You?" Toushirou tilts his head, unable to resist snarking at her for a bit of levity. "Cynical? Never would have guessed."
"Shut up," Karin says, sounding fond, batting his shoulder lightly. But she's grinning at him, and there's a victory to be found at the sight. Placing her hands on the back of her neck, Karin comes to a stop. "I know I am, but still."
"So what are you worried about, exactly?"
"What if they break up?" Karin says, quietly. "I mean, they're not in high school anymore. Ichi-nii's at university, Orihime's dedicated to her job. She's in Karakura Town, he's not. It's not that I want it to happen, because I don't, but… they might, you know?"
"They might," Toushirou says slowly, "but then again, they might not."
He's wonders if Momo's own advice was the most useful after all — let enough time pass and the feelings will fade. To keep an eye on it, not ignore it, waiting for the whole thing to play out to its natural end and so something, someone more interesting will come along and gain their attention.
But then again, perhaps not. Perhaps the feelings will remain and the two will remain steadfast and drawn to each other.
Only time will tell.
"I think you're overthinking things, Karin," Toushirou says, gently. "Seeing problems when there isn't any."
"Maybe," Karin sighs. "Probably."
"What's this really about?" Toushirou asks, sensing there's more to it than that. If she was really worried about Inoue and Kurosaki, he's certain Karin would have done something. It's more likely that this is a pretext for something else. But what it might be, he cannot guess. "You don't really think that just because they're not in high school that they'll break up, do you?"
"No, not really," Karin admits, and starts walking, Toushirou matching her pace easily. "I guess I was just thinking what my own dating life might be like when I've graduated high school."
"Oh?" Toushirou blinks. He didn't know Karin worried about things like that.
"Yeah," Karin says, grimacing. "I just… I just don't think I'll be as lucky as them, you know?"
"You mean you don't think you'll find someone to fall in love with by the time you've graduated high school?"
"I didn't say that! Jeez, is that what you think of me?" Karin says, tetchily, annoyed by his response. Without bothering to wait for his response, she continues. "What I meant, Toushirou, what if I break up with the person I'm dating after graduating high school?"
Oh.
"Because there's no guarantee, right? The person I fall in love with at fifteen might not be the same person I'm in love with at twenty," Karin continues, clearly given this subject some thought. "People grow up and change and sometimes it's better to break up than stay together because their relationship isn't enough for them anymore. They're not the person they used to be. Right?"
"Karin," Toushirou says, somewhat bemused. "There's nothing wrong with breaking up with someone."
"No, I know," Karin says, hastily. "I know that. It's just — both Goat-chin and Ichi-nii, they fell for someone, and sometimes when they talk about them, about Kaa-chan, about Orihime, you know that they're it for them."
"The sun speech," Toushirou says, recalling Shiba's explanation.
"Yeah," Karin nods. "I can't see my old man loving anyone the way he loved Kaa-chan."
Sometimes Toushirou wishes he could have met her. Just to see what Shiba was like when he was truly and madly in love.
"I can't see Ichi-nii loving anyone other than Orihime," Karin says, sounding wistful. "Makes me wish that I …"
"How did that man become a qualified doctor anyway?" Toushirou muses, folding his arms over his chest. "Because I can assure you, Karin, when he was Captain of the Tenth Division, well, he was the last person I would want to end up as a medic."
"I mean," Karin gazes at him with a crooked smile. "His bedside manner is pretty awful, but that doesn't mean he's a shitty doctor."
"It does," Toushirou grumbles, and Karin snorts.
"It really doesn't."
They fall into a brief interlude of silence then, Toushirou mulling over what they've just talked about.
It's an interesting perspective on love, Toushirou admits. He wonders if every human is like this — tying love to high school and wondering if it has expiry dates — or if it's just Karin.
"Does it really matter that you haven't found your… 'sun person' yet?" Toushirou asks, wincing slightly at how awkward it sounds.
"Sun person?" Karin teases, arching her eyebrow. "Just because of Goat-chin's 'sun speech' you've decided —"
"Fine, let's say 'true love'!" Toushirou interrupts, indignant. "Is that better?"
Momo use that term a lot when she's talking to Toushirou about her romance books. He remembers her telling him that it was a lot easier to tell who a person's true love was on paper; that she had sighed wistfully, and remarked that reality is much more difficult, and takes far longer, unfortunately.
Toushirou remembers thinking: why shouldn't it?
True love is not a decision lightly made; it's based on the heart and soul.
True love is eternal.
"Nah," Karin says. "Calling it true love sounds lame."
The tips of his ears burn.
It sounds mocking, coming from her. Not at all like how Momo says it, sincere and earnest and yearning.
"Then call it whatever you want!" Toushirou hisses, cheeks burning scarlet. "Does it worry you that you haven't found… that?"
"Not really," Karin shakes her head, and hums. "Honestly, Toushirou, I don't expect I'll find the love of my life until I'm like, thirty or something."
"So 'true love' sounds lame, but 'love of your life' doesn't?" Toushirou raises his eyebrow. "How does that work?"
"Hush," Karin says, ignoring him. "I'm just saying, just because I think someone isn't the love of my life, that doesn't mean I can't date him, right?"
His jaw drops.
"That's what this is all about?" Toushirou manages to say eventually. Is she referring to Juushirou? "Why didn't you start with that instead of the whole 'trouble in paradise' bit?"
"I was building up to it!" Karin says, cheeks reddening. "The point is, Toushirou, I got asked out!"
For someone who had been expressing worry about high school romances, it is certainly a surprise for Toushirou to realize how excited she is by it.
"You did?" Toushirou blinks, wondering if he's understanding this correctly. "So. Um. What was your response?"
"I said no," Karin cheerfully informs Toushirou with a devil-may-care smirk that suggests she's revelling in the novelty of it all. "To the first person."
"I see," Toushirou says drolly, taking note of her tone. "And what did you say to the second?"
"Ah, now, to him I said yes!" Karin beams, smug as she tells him all about it. "When he offered to pay for all my meals whenever we went on a date, how could I say no?"
He doesn't know whether to feel relieved or disappointed or —
"Not going to lecture me about being… what did you say again… being substantial, or anything?" Karin asks, when it becomes obvious he has nothing to say. She acts nonchalance, waiting, but there's an undercurrent of nervousness Karin cannot hide.
"Depends if you have a crush on him or not," Toushirou deadpans, aiming for levity.
The thing is, if it had been Juushirou, Toushirou would have been alarmed. Karin only knew Juushirou for five minutes, if that, so her crush on him had to be superficial, based solely on his incredible good looks.
Instead, her admirer is a schoolmate. Her reasons for accepting still was shallow, in Toushirou's opinion, but at least Karin had the opportunity to get to know him better, and for feelings to properly develop.
(Maybe it isn't the most romantic of beginnings, but it is a beginning nevertheless.)
"Hey!" Karin flushes. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"All that talk about dating someone who isn't the love of your life? That you might break up with him after high school?" Toushirou drawls, watching Karin go bright red. "Wasn't that you were getting at?"
"No!" Karin whacks his shoulder, harder than before. "That's not what I meant."
"That's what it sounded like," Toushirou mutters. "Alright then. Are you going to date him until he runs out of money? Will you dump him then?"
A relationship like that, Toushirou wonders, how long could it possibly last?
"You take that back!" Karin hisses, anger darkening her face. "Take it back right now!"
"Alright, sorry, I take it back," Toushirou states instantly, realizing that he'd gone too far. In a quieter voice, he asks. "You like him, then?"
"Wouldn't be dating him if I didn't," Karin says, scowling at him, still smarting from his remarks. "The money bit is just a bonus. He's… he's cute, okay?"
"But not the love of your life?" Toushirou asks, deciding it might be best to return to the main crux of their conversation.
"Well, it's. It's too soon to say," Karin flushes. "I know I like him. But love? I'm not so sure about that."
"But you could," Toushirou says, considering. Not entirely certain what to think. "Given enough time?"
"Maybe," Karin says, "I want to be realistic about this though. Maybe it won't work out…"
"Talk like that and you've doomed yourself before it's even begun," Toushirou remarks, not meaning to be unkind. Just factual. "And you wouldn't want that, would you?"
"No, I wouldn't," Karin agrees, wryly. She grins, somewhat self-depreciative. "Alright, I'll try not to doom myself. Should be easy, right?"
"Right," Toushirou says, easily. And then, before he can stop himself, says. "So, about your crush on my brother…"
He freezes.
What possessed him to say that?
It's clear that Karin's moved on, so why even bring it up?
"That was a month ago!" Karin says, going bright red nevertheless. "C'mon, Toushirou, I've got a boyfriend now! Keep up!"
A boyfriend who Toushirou only found out about minutes ago.
"Wait," Karin's eyes widen, struck by some awful thought. "Toushirou, you… you didn't tell Juushirou that I had a crush on him, did you?"
"What kind of best friend would I be if I had?" Toushirou looks at her, incredulous, as Karin breathes out, relieved.
He's rewarded with the sight of a sweet, shy smile.
"Good."
Momo was right.
He'd worried all that time for nothing.
Karin had probably pined for a week and then moved on.
Momo was right. Things had worked themselves out whether he said anything about the non-existence of a certain Hitsugaya Juushirou or not.
This was good. Right?
It was good that Karin wasn't pining for someone that two foolish people had made up, and he'd inadvertently went along with.
It was good that Karin was dating someone else — some boy he hadn't even met yet, hadn't even known about until today.
(Of course Karin doesn't tell him everything that goes on in her life, nor does he expect her to, but he can't help but feel like there were better ways to let him know about it, all the same.)
Someone new had come along, just as Momo said.
He thinks about the other thing Momo had said that had struck a nerve with him — if he was jealous of his future self and —
No.
He puts a stop to it before the thought can finish. Momo had been right about a lot of things, it didn't mean she was right about everything.
Is he jealous? Toushirou mulls over the question in his mind, feels the same scorn as last time. Again, what is there to be jealous of?
His future self?
His fake brother?
He scoffs, and dismisses it.
How ludicrous.
"Karin-chan said that?" Matsumoto asks, astonished, the next day.
He's sure it's nothing, a pretext for Karin's actual news, but there's no harm in checking in any case.
"She also said she's probably wrong," Toushirou says, sipping some coffee.
"Let me think," Matsumoto says, eyebrows lifting as she contemplates the information. "Last time I saw them, Orihime and Ichigo were a happy pair of lovebirds. Unless something changed?"
"I don't think so," Toushirou says, shaking his head. "I'm sure they're as happy as they've ever been."
"It's not like you to be such a busybody, Captain," Matsumoto notes, regarding him with a mischievous glint in her robin-egg eyes. "I didn't think you were the type."
"I'm not," Toushirou frowns, annoyed at how swiftly Matsumoto has pounced on the opportunity to gossip. They're on a coffee break at the moment, so he'll allow it, but he has a feeling that if he's not too careful, then Matsumoto will make the conversation go much longer than he should technically allow.
"Ah," Matsumoto says, delighted by his response, much to his annoyance. "Then you asked only because of Karin?"
"Yes," Toushirou answers, an edge to his voice. "She mentioned them, and then went on in a rather roundabout way to talk about her own… dating life."
"So she finally told you about him!" Matsumoto grins with catlike glee, and looks at him with an obnoxious expression. "I wondered when she might."
"You… you already knew?" Toushirou fluster.
"Of course!" Matsumoto preens. "Me and Karin-chan are close."
Since when? Toushirou nearly asks, skin prickling as he fights the urge to give voice to his question.
"Did Karin-chan happen to give her 'I'm a realist' rant?" Matsumoto asks, clearly amused by it, paying him no mind. "What did you think?"
"I heard something of the sort," Toushirou sighs. "It's… one way to look at love, I suppose."
"Not a very convincing one," Matsumoto remarks, tilting her head, and adds, "considering she got so excited about her first ever boyfriend."
"She wasn't that excited," Toushirou mutters, a touch cantankerous. Karin must have given a different one to Matsumoto to the one he heard.
"She was when I saw her," Matsumoto beams, looking fond as she reminisces some more. She looks up, and for a split second, he swears that her eyes are twinkling. "Trying hard not to look so happy, when she was over the moon about him. And who can blame her? He's a very cute boy, Captain! Definitely competition!"
"Against who?" Toushirou asks, flatly. He hates it when Matsumoto makes remarks like those, never failing to put him in a bad mood. "My brother?"
"Perhaps," Matsumoto replies, playful. "Perhaps."
"Well, you know what they say," Toushirou sighs, bitterly regretting starting the conversation in the first place. Voice laden with sarcasm, Toushirou continues. "Juushirou's a catch."
His fingers drum on the table, loudly.
"There's nothing to compete about!" Toushirou bursts out, louder than he intended. "Karin's made her decision! She's dating someone else and Juushirou is… I don't know. Somewhere far, far away!"
"Doesn't mean she can't change her mind," Matsumoto points out, smiling impishly as she takes out her phone. "Want to see what Daiki looks like?"
"Daiki?"
"Karin-chan's boyfriend, of course," Matsumoto murmurs, absently, attention elsewhere. "Aha! I found him!"
She saunters towards him, hands her phone over, triumph in her gaze.
Toushirou stares, keeping his expression carefully blank.
Brown hair. Brown eyes. A nice smile. Freckles.
"So what do you think of Karin's sweetheart?" Matsumoto says, after Toushirou has handed her phone back. "Cute, right?"
"Yes," Toushirou agrees eventually, somewhat curt. He's a little taken aback by her choice of words, but it's just because he isn't used to hearing it in the same context of Karin. "I suppose so."
"She's got good taste, that's for sure," Matsumoto grins sunnily, as she returns to comfortably sitting on the sofa, leaning her head back.
Toushirou glances at the clock, they've got a couple of seconds left until their break is over.
"Aw, she's growing up so fast, Captain! And to think that just a few weeks ago, she had the most adorable crush on your older brother!"
He doesn't know how he's supposed to respond to that.
He just feels awkward.
"Yeah, well," Toushirou mutters, flustering as he tries to think of something to say, and finishes inelegantly with: "It was never going to happen."
He's glad that Karin has moved on.
Really.
It means that Toushirou is spared from the distress of seeing Karin pine for someone who doesn't exist.
And yet.
Something about Karin's crush on his 'older brother' piqued his curiosity. Maybe it was her expression, that day, Toushirou muses, recalling how star-struck Karin had been. At the time, he'd been unaware that she'd been smitten, but on reflection, the signs were obvious, and he couldn't rid himself of the memory. Karin had clearly liked what she'd seen, even if she was at a loss of her trademark snappy comebacks.
It surprised him.
Never had Karin stuttered or became that affected by a person before, but then, Toushirou surmises, he'd never seen Karin develop feelings for someone. Maybe Karin was tongue-tied around her boyfriend, Daiki, and Toushirou had yet to see that side of her. Maybe Matsumoto was right, and Karin was excited to date Daiki, and excited that Daiki wanted to date Karin.
But the way Karin had talked about Daiki… had been odd.
That she might not meet the love of her life until she's thirty; that Daiki might not be it, but she was liked him well enough to see if he could be.
Something about the way she'd said that had struck a nerve with Toushirou. Maybe she'd been joking about the fact that Daiki had offered to pay for all her meals as the clincher, but…
He knows he shouldn't be so quick to judge, and yet…
It's a side of Karin that he never knew existed. He's never thought of her as shallow before, but… between Juushirou and Daiki; she'd showed her shallowness in very different ways and Toushirou doesn't know what to make of it.
As far as he knew, she'd never acted like that around him. And that… that was good, right?
It meant that Karin saw Toushirou as her friend, nothing more. She doesn't have to put on an act, always speaking her mind, enjoying the times he drops by to visit her in Karakura Town, and is more than comfortable to take it upon herself to drop by the Tenth Division's office if she needs to.
Even though they've bickered and butted heads from time to time, because both Toushirou and Karin could be stubborn like nobody's business, they were closer because of it, and they knew how to find a middle ground.
On the whole, there was something remarkably easy-going about their friendship, which he has always appreciated.
Somehow, Karin enjoys his personality, and thinks highly of him, even if she likes to poke fun at him — and for someone who has had difficulty in gaining friends, especially back in the days of Rukongai, Toushirou is glad that he met her. He likes her brash but thoughtful natures, how easily she wears her heart on her sleeve, and the fact that she's never once been afraid of him.
(Except now there's the existence of his fictitious older brother and Karin having feelings for him — insistent that it's a crush — and suddenly everything become far more complicated than Toushirou could have ever imagined.)
He buries his face in his hands. Groans.
A fictitious older brother.
How did things escalate this badly? Rationally, he knows he should have put a stop to the rumours, right at the beginning, and then, he shouldn't have let Momo add fuel to it, creating a feasible backstory, and yet.
And yet he couldn't, because he cannot bring himself to admit such an embarrassing truth.
It had gone on for far too long to suddenly announce to everyone that actually, there was no Hitsugaya Juushirou. That it was Hitsugaya Toushirou all along, and it was because of his bankai needing to age him up in order to sustain that kind of power —
Nobody had to know that he didn't like how he looked in the future.
He was fine with ignoring the hype, the gossip, the fan club the Shinigami Women's Association decided to devote to Hitsugaya Juushirou. Toushirou had his own, actually, if Matsumoto had been truthful about that. He was fine with the way things were, perhaps not happy with it, but he was willing to wait for it to blow over.
But then Karin happened.
And, well.
That complicated things.
He just wants to check, he tells himself during the week, each time he feels uneasy. There's no harm in it.
Karin has a boyfriend. Toushirou knows that. He is not going to undermine that.
Hitsugaya Juushirou might be flirt, but even he knows how to be gallant.
Toushirou makes a mental note to tell Momo that later. He does have some creative input, after all.
He wants to be sure that Karin is over Juushirou. There is nothing wrong with that.
And so, one sunny afternoon, Hitsugaya Juushirou seeks out Kurosaki Karin.
Hitsugaya Juushirou, Toushirou reminds himself, as he takes a deep breath and forces himself to relax, before he uses bankai to become his future self, is flirty, ditzy, and not to mention an irrefutable narcissist.
"Okay," Toushirou mutters under his breath, transformed. He's ready as he'll ever be in becoming his imaginary brother's persona. "Let's do this."
He spots Karin practising soccer, bouncing the ball on her knee, and draws himself up.
"Hey! Karin!" Toushirou greets, as Juushirou, and instantly feels stupid.
Will she see right through him and realize who he is, or will she continue to believe that he is Toushirou's older brother?
He stands there, tall and towering, watching Karin turn to the direction of his voice, watching Karin turn to look at him, and when she finally does, it's like the world stops for just a moment.
Toushirou feels nervous, all of a sudden. The sensation builds in his stomach, then rises, making his chest feel tight. He wants her so badly to figure out it's him, without having to actually say the words.
Her eyes widen, then her face flushes, and then the ball is left to roll away as she forgets to kick it back up in the air.
And then the biggest smile Toushirou has ever seen graces Karin's face.
"No way, Juushirou!" Karin beams, beatific, surprise shifting into delight. She raises her hand and waves. "Hey, yourself! What are you doing here?"
Toushirou's mind goes blank.
What was he doing? What was Juushirou supposed to be doing?
He was… he was here to check that Karin didn't have a crush on him! Yes! That was it! But… how exactly does someone do that?
He should have gone to Momo and consulted her instead of impulsively going to Karin.
He should have done a test run with Momo, to get a feel for the louder than life character that both of them had created.
It's all well and good to decide that Juushirou was a flirt, a ditz and a narcissist, but for Toushirou to act like that is a problem, considering it's the opposite of how he behaves, and is only now just realizing he might not have the capability to pull it off.
Too late now.
"I was in the neighbourhood," Toushirou admits, eventually, after a prolonged pause, hoping that it could somehow be mistaken as a dramatic pause instead of letting the silence go on for too long because he didn't know what to say. He continues, determined to ignore his self-consciousness. "I wanted to see what you were up to. If that's okay?"
"Um," Karin says, blinking rapidly, and gulps. Her cheeks blossom into a colour that's redder than roses, clearly trying to think up words in response to him. She doesn't hide her obvious delight that he specifically came to see her, lighting up with a smile. "That's… yeah. That's more than okay. I mean, you're Toushirou's brother, so, if he's cool, you're cool! You know?"
"He's cool, sure," Toushirou nods, finding adorable how Karin is rabbiting with her words, nervous but pleased, all the same. Since Juushirou is narcissist and probably can't stand being on the same level of coolness as his younger brother, Toushirou declares with a flourishing stance and a raised voice. "But I'm cooler."
Instantly, he feels like a prat.
Karin snorts, then bursts into giggles.
Toushirou tries to fight the heat spreading on his face, hoping that Karin's reaction is a step in the right direction.
He waits for her giggles to end, his expression frozen on his face. He hopes that he looks nonchalant rather than mortified by the lame joke he made.
"You're something else, that's for sure," Karin says, lips quirked into grin, amusement laced into her voice. She tucks a loose strand of hair that's fallen out of place behind her ear, bites the corner of her mouth, and then looks up at him, considering. "Not exactly what I had in mind for Toushirou's older brother."
He raises his eyebrow at her, tilts his head slightly. Haughty. But when he speaks, his voice is confused. Almost hurt. "Didn't Toushirou tell you about me?"
He doesn't know what he's doing. Everything Momo has ever said about Juushirou is just… gone. He can't remember what she said beyond: flirty, ditzy and narcissist, so now he's forced to improvise and make it up as he goes along.
The important thing is to stay calm.
Calm.
"Not really, no," Karin folds her arms across her chest, and shakes her head.
Matsumoto hadn't said anything to Karin? Nor Kuchiki?
Nothing?
Toushirou swings his limbs, feeling like a scarecrow, but Juushirou places his hand on his heart, like he's been wounded, the melodramatic fool. Feeling very much like a caricature, Toushirou shakes his head, opens his mouth, and says —
"For shame, baby brother! For shame!"
If Toushirou actually had an older brother like this, he has no doubt he would hate him.
"Hey, don't say that!" Karin protests, a loyal friend to the end. "He's not so bad."
"No, I suppose not," Juushirou ruefully concedes, Toushirou more than happy to backtrack and agree with her. Under the pretence of being overly dramatic, he lets out a heavy sigh. "He is my brother, after all. He can't be all bad, even if we are as different as night and day."
What are words? What is acting?
Toushirou sorely regrets coming here at all. He's making such a fool out of himself.
"I'm beginning to see why you two don't get along," Karin mutters, and he bristles.
"I… wouldn't say that!" Toushirou lies through his teeth, struggling to remain in character.
It's true that Juushirou's personality does annoy him, but Toushirou has given their dynamic some thought, to really sell the realism of being actual brothers, and had decided that no matter how many times they clash, Toushirou's personality wouldn't annoy Juushirou nearly as much as Juushirou's personality annoys Toushirou.
"We get along just fine, Karin!" Toushirou says, with great difficulty. "Toushirou is just… very serious and very grumpy, you know? Always in a bad mood for some reason. I try so hard to cheer him up, but then… without warning, he explodes at me! Ha!"
Toushirou forces himself to laugh. Laugh light-heartedly. Laugh like Juushirou is unaware that the fault is his own.
Internally, he winces. He knows he can be self-depreciating at the worst of times, but even this is a bit much, right?
Should he really be saying these things about himself?
"Um, Toushirou isn't the type to explode for no reason, Juushirou," Karin says, slow to respond, taken aback by his response. "I should know, I've made him mad more times than I can count, but the thing is, I know that usually it comes from a well-meaning place. Most of the time. The other times, it's 'cause he doesn't know better."
Toushirou resents that, but because he's Juushirou, he lets it slide.
"Sure, he's serious and grumpy," Karin acknowledges, with an oddly fond smile. "But he happens to be my best friend."
Toushirou can't help but beam at Karin, basking in her praise.
"And I am delighted to hear it!" Juushirou declares, nodding approvingly, a heartbeat later. Toushirou snaps his fingers and instantly regrets that decision. Nevertheless, as Juushirou, he blusters onwards, voice booming like it did when he was talking to Abarai and Kuchiki under that mistaken pretence. "That was a test, and you passed with flying colours."
Karin stares at him.
He flashes a grin.
Karin continues to stare at him.
His cheeks hurt from smiling too long.
… it's too late to undo that character choice. He can't go back in time, however much he wishes he could.
"Um," Karin says, looking at him utterly baffled, gaping, and yet doing her best to make sense of the ridiculous sentence he just said. "… what?"
Toushirou doesn't blame her.
He's confused too.
He doesn't know what he's doing.
At all.
"I worry about my baby brother," Juushirou explains after a pause. Pausing is good. Gives him time to think. Simple is best, Toushirou knows, mind racing as he comes up with reasonable-ish sounding answer. "He doesn't have a lot of friends, you see. And well, since he talks about you so often, and with so much praise, that I… well. I had to know what kind of person you were, seeing as I didn't get the chance to, last time."
"So. So, wait. Let me get this straight," Karin looks at him, mouth parted, lashes fluttering as the cogs turn in her brain. "You were looking out for Toushirou?"
"Yeah!" Toushirou winks at her. Juushirou, Toushirou realizes belatedly, would probably say something cheesy like bingo instead. Like hell he was about say something like that. He could barely wink at Karin and not cringe at his own actions. "And you passed!"
"Oh… um. Good," Karin says slowly, stunned. As if it was difficult to wrap her head around the revelation that Juushirou was an oddly protective older brother. "Great."
Toushirou can hardly believe it himself.
"Yes," Juushirou agrees, confirming, and then adds, because Toushirou maintains that he must be a gentleman, if an unexpectedly eccentric one. "But I can go, if you want?"
Karin's passed 'the test' apparently… does Juushirou really need to be here any longer?
"No!" Karin says, quickly, and Toushirou freezes. She clears her throat, cheeks pinkening. "Um, I mean… stay a while. Yeah. Hey, Juushirou, do you… um… want to play soccer with me?"
"Soccer?" Juushirou echoes, while Toushirou blanches, wishing that he'd made his exit when he had the chance.
"Yeah, soccer!" Karin nods, gaining her gung-ho confidence back, and leaping at the chance to shine and show off her skills. "I don't know how much Toushirou has told you about me, but… I'm pretty good at the sport. Better than he is, by far."
There's bragging rights, and then there's bragging lies.
"Really?" Toushirou drawls, picking up the soccer ball. He scrutinizes it like he doesn't know what he's supposed to do with it. Absent-mindedly, he wonders how far Karin is willing to go uttering such blatant untruths.
"Mmhm," Karin nods, absolutely shameless. Arms akimbo, she stands on her tiptoes and says with complete seriousness. "I taught him all I know. So he's good, but he's not as great as me."
How lucky for Karin that Toushirou isn't here. Oh, wait…
He's just about to open his mouth and disagree — because it wouldn't be uncharacteristic to defend his own — no, wait, his brother's — honour. Right?
"I take it… you don't know how to play soccer, huh?" Karin says, and looks up at him, hopeful. "I can teach you, if you like?"
He throws the ball up in the air, and catches it with his hands.
"It'll be fun, I promise," Karin says, grinning like she knows she's already got him, hook, line and sinker before he's even said yes.
"Alright," Toushirou gives in, reluctant to refuse. He rolls his eyes. "Since you promised."
Toushirou is quick to realize that he has made a mistake.
In the body of his future self, his limbs are too long and spindly for his liking. The change in height means that his centre of gravity has shifted, and though he's able to adjust to it during a fight, there are a few missteps in the first few moments upon his completing Daiguren Hyourinmaru. It's his pride that vainly hopes that nobody notices his exaggerated movements as he tries to regain his balance and accustom himself to the change.
He's had practice getting used to this body in a fight, but when it's something as trivial as bouncing a ball —
"I thought I'd be better at this," Toushirou mutters, frustrated by how much he feels like a stranger in his own body. It's like the first few times he completed Daiguren Hyourinmaru all over again.
"You will be," Karin says, patiently, trying to hide her smile but being utterly unable to do so. "Just give it some time. We can't all start off as talented soccer players, can we?"
She helps him up from the grass.
Again.
"Watch me," Toushirou huffs, gritting his teeth. "Just you wait."
"Whatever you say, Juushirou," Karin humours him, and laughs at he looks at her, hopeless, her cheeks flushed, soft and pink.
When Toushirou gets fed up of genuinely being bad at the basics of soccer — which infuriates him to an uncanny degree because he really thought he'd be better at it in his future self's body than he is — he bids his farewell.
Now is the time to flirt, Toushirou decides, determined that Juushirou won't overstep Karin's boundaries.
He takes her hand.
"Thank you, Karin," Juushirou says gallantly. Spurred by the desire to do something swoon worthy, he kisses her hand. "For an afternoon most magical."
"Um, s-sure," Karin says, flustered by the gesture, and uses her other hand to tuck her hair behind her ear. She grins at him, like she can't help herself, bright and brilliant. "We should do this again sometime."
"You can count on it," Juushirou promises sincerely, before he disappears in front of her without a trace.
That was exhausting, Toushirou thinks later, not yet fully recovered from the ordeal. Not just in terms of physicality, but in personality.
How can anyone stand it?
It occurs to Toushirou as he reflects that he might have made things worse, somehow, not better.
"Oh no," Toushirou inhales sharply, suddenly cognizant of his actions, conscious of how they might have been perceived by Karin. In an instant, he knows that he has, without a doubt, made things so much worse.
Blood drains from his face.
What had he done?
