The party scene was way out of Ravi's element.
He wasn't a partier by nature. In contrast to other people his age who longed for the thrill of the music and socialization with their peers, throwing all of their cares and worries out the window for one night to feel free and happy. It just wasn't the environment that he could thrive in. His siblings weren't like that. They liked being the center of attention and everything that Ravi desired not to be. It was one of many differences between them. He was more of a homebody, whereas they could be found all over the city doing who knows what.
As he and Shelby came to find out, Marcy Rogers did not live in an apartment complex, not this one and it wasn't even a complex in the first place. Rather, it was a hotel that went out of business some years ago and was now abandoned and on the market. Her parents received permission for Marcy to use it that night for her party. An entire building for one evening. Not for a special occasion either, merely a last-minute decision to have some weekend fun.
Much as he was astounded in some way, feeling so was technically hypocritical on his part. His parents had done something similar a time or two, but that had been a different circumstance. It hadn't been for a teenage party. Once they'd rented a restaurant out for themselves and some other people related to their area of work for a celebration. For their dad, he'd just finished directing a movie that was sure to be a hit (and it had been) and their mom had successfully done a fashion show that was filmed and posted online for everyone to see; not a thing had gone out of place and no mistakes were made. That was also a hit.
A sensible part of Ravi tried to reason with that thought. His parents' celebration was more practical than letting teenagers run amok in a former hotel, risking them trashing it or causing irreparable damage in some way. He wasn't going to put it past anyone, especially if certain people had been invited and by the looks of it, almost everyone had been.
The hotel, in its glory days, must have been one of those five-star, ultra expensive ones that no ordinary person with an ordinary salary could afford on a whim. Of course that's where she chose, although Marcy Rogers-from a distance as they hadn't ever talked face-to-face-seemed more suited with a ballroom and band that she just needed to have because all the kids were listening to them. Still, it was fairly extravagant.
The lobby was bigger than Ravi's living room. All the lights had been turned on, which was extraordinarily bright, like the sunshine early in the morning. He peered up at the shiny chandeliers that hung from the ceiling, swaying slightly to the breeze from the air condition. In front of the desk where a customer would check in was the snack table, or should he say, tables. She'd certainly gone all out in that aspect. There was every kind of non-alcoholic beverage one could think of and a ton of chips and cookies and snack cakes and-
His stomach growled hungrily.
Ravi should have eaten before he came. His nerves had overwhelmed him, dwindling his appetite to nothing. Except for a half-glass of water that he chugged prior to Shelby's arrival in the lobby of his building. Now he was feeling famished and slightly regretful. All of that food looked quite tasty, but he wasn't going to just go and pop one in his mouth. He wanted to but he just..
What if they stare at me?
What if they judge me for eating?
What if we're supposed to wait and no one told us?
He couldn't just go up there alone. It already felt like all eyes were boring into him, which was difficult to ignore. He was exhaling slowly, trying to calm himself down. Shelby didn't notice anything was wrong with him, she was bursting with excitement, grabbing him by the arm and wagging it up and down whilst he stayed still with an impassive expression.
"Let's go up to the roof," she beamed. "I think the music's up there. You wanna dance? Do you like dancing? I do! It's so much fun! Have you ever taken dancing lessons? I haven't but I know someone who did. I can't dance correctly," she said this with air-quotes, "but I got rhythm. You wanna see?"
"Why don't we wait until we're up there?" Ravi said, glancing around. "I'm sure it will be better with the music."
Said music was blaring so loud that they-at least, Ravi was-were able to hear it from where they were standing. Not well enough to decipher the lyrics, but nonetheless it was heard.
"Good idea!" Shelby dragged him over to where the elevator was, pressing the button with her thumb. He could only hope that no one else was in there. She might be alright to surround herself with strangers but he was not.
He didn't have to worry about that, as it turned out. It was empty. They went in inside and Shelby pressed the button for the rooftop. "This is so cool!" she grinned. "Have you ever been to a prty like this? I can't believe they're using a hotel for it. I've never stayed in a hotel before. Have you? I've always wanted to. I wonder if there's an indoor pool? Too bad it's not a pool party. That'd be fun."
"I don't think there'd be any water left in it, even if there is."
"Aw, really? That's disappointing. Swimming sounds really fun right now. I'd jump in."
"Even dressed like that?" Ravi gestured. Walking around in soaking wet jeans that would cling to his legs didn't sound like anything he wanted to be apart of.
"Sure!"
"If it comes down to you doing, you're on your own," Ravi said, warningly.
She giggled.
The doors dinged as they opened and in that moment Ravi wished he'd brought some ear plugs. It was instantaneous, how the noise level went from zero to one-hundred. Shelby didn't seem at all bothered. They stepped off, Ravi wanted to hide, to go back into the elevator and looked over his shoulder longingly as the doors closed back up.
The sheer amount of people present was far more than it'd looked when they were down on the ground. It was packed most likely more than it should have been for the limited space that was available. It was probably a hazard by some standard; he didn't know the exact number for the vicinity's capacity, but he imagined it was less than what was being occupied right now.
Ravi didn't even recognize all of the party goers as being students from Walden. They couldn't have been, as some appeared to be a bit too old to be considered a student and others must have been from a school nearby. All of them had one thing in common and that was not being an underclassmen; that was one rule he knew of, despite not being out much in the party scene. It wasn't considered cool to have a bunch of younger kids invited so they were strictly forbidden from attending. It was probably for good reason. Parties held by people from his school were known to get a bit wild, which effectively kept Ravi from ever being interested in going-along with that dilemma of getting invited. That seemed to put a halt into things, too.
He had to resist the childish urge to plug his ears with his fingers to give them a break from the horrifically loud music that was playing. The music was being blasted from expensive looking speakers that were set up in the corners to some song that was not of the few genres he would listen to. Not to mention, some couples had taken to dancing rather inappropriately with each other. They might as well have taken their clothes off, for goodness sake's. He grimaced. This was not what he had in mind for his first real party in...
Forever, really.
"Oh, there's Marcy!" Shelby yelled happily, barely audible over the music. She pointed over to where Marcy Rogers was dancing with a guy, which quickly transformed into her grabbing him by the front of his shirt and proceeding to make-out rather heavily, not minding a few whistles that went their way or get it girl from someone else. "Wanna go say hi?"
"Perhaps later," Ravi side-eyed her, "she, er, looks a bit busy."
It really was difficult to hear each other. He and Shelby leaned in closer and all Ravi could smell was vanilla, which was radiating off of her. It must have been a shampoo. Vanilla bean. It wasn't that bad. Less obnoxious than some of the other smells from other girls he'd been around. Emma, for one, had a variety of perfumes that made him scrunch up his nose.
That's an interesting thing to notice
It hardly is
You think she smells nice
And? What of it?
You typically do that if you like the person
That is ridiculous. I do not like her. I'm simply observing. There is a difference
Not in this case
The music was starting to make his ears ache. He groaned. How could anyone withstand this? Nobody looked like they were bothered. They all seemed to be enjoying themselves and the person that they were with.
You can't relate
Or can you?
Makes you wish you had a girlfriend, hmm?
But it doesn't matter
No girl is going to want you when she could have literally anyone else
Someone that's better
Someone that's worth it
You aren't worth it
But you know that already
Don't you?
He wanted to leave. Needed to get out of there now. He began to fiddle with his collar, breathing in and out. This was getting to be too much. Too much to handle at once. Why had he agreed to come? Oh. Right.
Shelby.
Had he been by himself, he would have bolted back in the elevator and out the front entrance of the building in a split second. But he couldn't very well do that right now. Shelby was new around there and this was her first time at a city party, so he wasn't going to her alone. Regardless of what he was feeling, he wouldn't do that. That was a promise.
Shelby was still beside him. Her body was swaying, but not outright dancing like everyone else was. He'd expected her to jump on the dance floor with some outrageous, embarrassing moves. Ravi watched as some guy he did not know approach her, his hand resting on the wall. He was a smidgen taller than Shelby and was giving her a look purely rooted in lust.
He was sure that she didn't notice that part. She was somewhat naïve and now that he thought about it, he'd never really heard her talk about guys she was interested in, nor had she mentioned having a boyfriend. Perhaps she hadn't. There was nothing wrong with that. He just wondered if she wasn't allowed to date or if that was her choice to wait.
"Hey there, gorgeous," the guy, who Ravi was referring to as Guy Who Thinks He's Pretty in his head because he was clearly one of those types, grinned at her. He was a typical buff guy, that probably spent a majority of his free time working out. The kind that girls would swoon over.
He was also ignoring the fact that Ravi was right there so it made things slightly awkward.
He hoped Shelby didn't forget he was there, too.
Shelby didn't giggle or blush or give any indication that she was falling for the charm Guy Who Think He's Pretty was attempting to put out. It was honestly a good thing.
You sound like you're jealous
Like a jealous boyfriend
I am not jealous
That is ridiculous
Second time you've said that
Because it's true!
She shouldn't fall for something like this
"Hi," Shelby smiled a normal, totally not going gaga over him, smile.
"What's your name?" Guy Who Thinks He's Pretty asked her. "You live around here?"
Don't give him your location...
"Shelby," was the only thing she offered. "And yeah. Sort of."
"Shelby," he drawled and Ravi disliked the tone in which he was speaking. "Nice. I don't think I've seen you around. You must not go to Townsend."
"Oh, I don't," she said without seeming like she felt uneasy around him.
"Too bad," Guy Who Thinks He's Pretty was eying her. "Might actually enjoy going if you did."
Ravi rolled his eyes.
"You know," Guy Who Thinks He's Pretty said, inching a bit closer to her, looking put out when she backed away slightly. He recovered, though. "I bet you like to dance. Is that true? How about you come show me how good you are. A girl like you must have moves."
I knew it, Ravi thought.
He didn't realize that along with his thought, he's snorted-out loud.
It was just as the song that had been playing, changed. So both Shelby and Guy Who Thinks He's Pretty turned to look at him. Under the unintentional attention, he shrunk a bit, blushing.
"What?" Guy Who Thinks He's Pretty said, irritably. "You think something's funny? Huh?"
What was it about Ravi that attracted unbelievably tall guys to him? The last thing he wanted was to cause any trouble. This guy, however, seemed to be alright with being the cause of it. Ravi cleared his throat, inwardly panicking but trying not to show it. That was important, not to show the other guy that he was fearful. They feed off of that. Makes it worse. "Erm, no. No. Of course not," Ravi said, weakly. "I just...remembered something funny."
Because that's not a lame excuse
Guy Who Thinks He's Pretty snarled. "Do you think I'm stupid? Huh?"
"No! I didn't mean it like that. I just-"
Shelby moved, getting in the middle between him and the other guy. He did a inward sigh of relief. Despite how brutish Guy Who Thinks He's pretty seemed, he wouldn't stoop so low as to risk hitting a girl. Not where there was an audience which could prompt a recording of him.
Well, he thought so.
But she did not come to save him as he'd hoped (and he was aware of how much of a wuss that made him sound).
She flashed him a smile. "What did you remember?"
Which was the worst possible thing she could have said.
I hate you, Ravi stared at her, flatly.
Why, why why!
Are you trying to get me killed?
"It was nothing important," Ravi gulped when the other guy cracked his knuckles loudly.
Yep, definitely looking for a fight.
"But if it was nothing important, why was it funny?" she tilted her head sideways. "I don't get it."
Please just shut up
Guy Who Thinks He's Pretty kept a steely glare on Ravi, like he was this close to snapping him in half. He didn't doubt it. The guy looked like he could crush a pineapple with little effort. "Forget about him," he said to Shelby. "Let's say you and me go have a little fun."
"No, thank you," Shelby said, easily. "I'm fine right here. Besides-" She smiled at Ravi again, "I don't wanna leave Ravi alone."
Guy Who Thinks He's Pretty did not appreciate being turned down. It must not be a regular occurrence for him. His face hardened and he scoffed. "You wanna stay with that loser?"
Which, technically, he hadn't been around Ravi for more than five minutes and already knew he was a loser.
Because everyone knows
It's obvious
You just don't get it
It was just like her first day at Walden when they were in the cafeteria. That girl-Sienna, maybe? Sierra?-she invited to sit with her and Ravi had declined because of him and so the girl told Shelby to come with her to another table. He'd thoroughly expected her to do just that, to be like any other teenager and crave instant popularity, especially for a newcomer like herself.
But she hadn't done that. She'd stood up for him. For some reason.
Like she was doing right now.
She stood her ground, not the least bit intimidated by the height difference between her and Guy Who Thinks He's Pretty. "He's not a loser," she said, simply. "You really shouldn't be so rude, you know. It's not very nice. Do your parents know you're like this? Because if they don't-"
The other guy ignored her rambling. "Fine. If you think he's so great, then stay with him. I got plenty of other girls who'd love to be with me."
Shelby blinked. "Then why are you over here with us?"
Guy Who Thinks He's Pretty made a noise that conveyed his irritation and stomped off, quickly loosing the charm he'd tried to show that he had.
That's the second time she's defended you
And yet you still can't think of her as a real friend
Don't you see what's wrong with that picture?
"Are you okay?" This time she didn't have to shout. A slower, quieter song was playing. She was genuinely wondering, reaching out to touch his forearm. "Did he upset you? He was kinda mean, calling you a loser like that."
He's only telling the truth
You just won't accept it
"Ravi?"
"What?" he said, quietly.
The atmosphere had changed drastically. Couples were slow dancing with each other. Snuggled up as close as they could be, enjoying the other's presence. Some even twirled their dates, which made gleeful laughter erupt from them.
"You know you're not a loser, right?"
She was serious. Actually serious. So earnest. There was no doubt that she believed what she was saying.
He could not, however.
He just...couldn't.
She's lying
She doesn't mean it
She's trying to trick you
It's all a game
Don't fall for it
She'll be laughing later
At you
He was brought out of his musings by her gently yanking on his sleeve. She was jerking her head toward the exit door instead of the elevator, meaning that she wanted him to follow her. "Come on," she led them over there. "Let's go back downstairs. I'm thirsty. Are you? Let's get something to drink. I think I saw some soda on the table. Hopefully there's still some left. Be a bummer if there wasn't."
The door slammed shut behind Ravi. He jumped a little, admittedly. The stair case looked like something out of a horror movie. Cold, like there was a draft coming in. Fairly dark except for a lone light that hung at the ceiling and flickered. It must have been the old. The building, too. Couldn't have been too recent by the looks of things. Or, maybe not been renovated in some time. He half expected someone to jump out at them. It would fit with what Emma would say was the aesthetic of things.
"Erm, so-"
And he stopped. He didn't know what to say.
As always, Shelby filled in the silence. "My ears are still ringing," she said, shaking her head, presumably to help with that problem. "Are yours? It was way too loud. But can you believe that first song? I didn't like that. My parents don't like me listening to that stuff. Do yours let you?"
Ravi's were hardly around and when they were, none such rules regarding the music he and his siblings listened came into question. They pretty much let their children do whatever, well, nearly, as evident by his semi-recent grounding he was dealt.
You mean you
If it was Luke, they wouldn't have punished him
It's just you
They hate you
They wish they didn't adopt you
Luke feels that way
Remember?
"They don't care," Ravi eventually said. He pushed on the door that led to a long hallway that went back to the lobby and various other rooms that were being used by the party goers. He didn't want to find out what certain purposes that some of those people were using the rooms for. He then asked her, "Erm, are you okay? You know, because of that guy?"
"Oh, yeah!" Shelby wasn't visibly upset by what had happened. Other than shifting away, she seemed fine. "I'm fine. It's sweet of you to worry, though."
"I wasn't-" he protested.
He was not worried. He was just looking out for her. That was the polite thing to do, especially for her not being in the city for that long. She just didn't know the people and their interactions were probably different than what she'd dealt with back in her home town.
But he was not worried.
That was just absurd.
"You might want to move," she said, airily.
"What?"
He yelped. Two guys had found a luggage cart and were currently hanging off of it, riding-racing-down the hallway, hollering. Ravi threw himself against the wall, staring at the two boys incredulously as they zoomed past. It was obviously not a party that was being supervised by Marcy's parents. He imagined that things were going to get to the wild stage very soon. Hopefully he and Shelby would leave by then.
"Have they no sense of manners?" he muttered.
"Probably not," Shelby swung her arms back and forth. 'But it does look like fun, doesn't it? I wish I could try. That'd be neat. Oooh, I remember me and my friends did something similar back home. Well, we didn't have a cart like that but we used trash cans. One of us got inside and someone pushed them all around. That was fun. Ooh, you wanna see if we can a can and I'll push you?"
She looked excited at the thought.
"No," he said, immediately.
"Fiiine," she hit him on the back and he simply blinked. "You really should try smiling more. See?" she gave him a visual. "I like your smile. It's nice. But you don't do it often."
"I have nothing to smile for," he said, shortly.
Why are you even telling her?
It's not like she'll care
Because she doesn't
They halted and she stood in front of him. He glanced around, wary in case there could be any more racing luggage carts coming toward him. "Sure you do! There's always a reason to smile. You just gotta try!"
No there isn't
You just don't get it
You don't understand
It's not that simple
It was as overly simplistic as she believed it to be; smiling wasn't going to magically cure his anxious thoughts and worries, or uplift things. It just wasn't. He was realistic, she was not. She was naively optimistic, he was not. But he couldn't just try to explain that to her. To anyone, really. People just assumed he was to blame, that he was his own worst enemy, that he just needed to look on the bright side and everything would be better. Well, it wouldn't. It wasn't like that. They just didn't comprehend it.
Shelby looked at him meaningfully. "Why do you say that?"
"Say what?"
"That you have nothing to smile for?" She wanted to know. 'What does that mean?"
He's said too much.
"Nothing," he said, quickly. He didn't mean for that to slip out. "It's nothing important. Forget about it."
"It must be if you said it."
"It isn't."
"I think you're trying to avoid it," she said.
"You're wrong."
"Am I?" She asked him.
"Yes," Ravi said with more confidence than he actually had.
You're really trying
But she doesn't believe you
You're a horrible liar
Her face softened. She didn't press anymore with the subject, thank goodness. She let it be, let it fizzle out before saying, "Let's go get a drink. I'm still thirsty."
He was thankful for the change of subject. "Alright," he agreed with caution.
"I think I saw some punch. You want some? Or do you not like punch? I like it, but I prefer soda. It's sweeter. I like sweet stuff. Course, my parents always tell me not to over do it. Do your parents say that? I used to know a guy whose parents are dentists and he doesn't get to have much sugar. That'd be a bummer, don't you think? I heard he wasn't ever allowed to have cake on his birthday. What kind of birthday doesn't have cake?"
The snack tables were still over flowing with food and drink, which gave reassurance that they hadn't run out. Shelby was still chattering away as she handed him a ice cold and dripping wet can of cola. He gave a nod as his thanks and cracked it open. He raised it to his lips when he spotted three large figures coming through the front doors.
"Mitch, glad you could make it, man," someone said, giving him a fist bump.
"Wouldn't miss it," Mitch grinned and reciprocated.
Ravi's can gave a thud as it fell to the floor.
