Interlude – Camp
Deirdre's been kidnapped. I'm recovering from a near death experience. Shanan is injured. Seliph cries and cries and no one can seem to comfort him.
This is all such a mess. Why did everything go so wrong so fast?
It hurt to move. It hurt to breath. Everything hurt. What was far worse, though, was the absence. I had no Deirdre. Deirdre was gone. My best friend was gone, kidnapped, and I felt her absence so very keenly. If she'd been here, she would've been right by my side, fussing like mad. She'd have brought flowers to cheer me up, papers to keep me busy. She'd have brought Seliph with her, so that I could play with him. She'd have made me laugh twenty times in as many minutes, and then panic when I'd start coughing because everything hurt. I wouldn't have cared, though. Because she'd be here.
I had to brace myself against the wall, breathing heavily. I'd barely pushed myself out of bed, and already, I was about to collapse. I struggled to breath, coughing a bit, and made myself take a step. My vision blurred as my legs protested. I coughed more and felt like molten daggers were sliding into my ribs. My arms trembled. My legs shook. I… was about to fall.
"Sister!" Thankfully, though, no one was in a hurry to leave me alone for long. Azel caught me before I collapsed, and helped me back into bed. "You of all people should know better than to push yourself!" he scolded, tucking me back in. I didn't even have the breath to reassure him. "Easy…"
"Sorry…" I finally managed. I also managed a smile, though it felt more like my face was cracking. "I just… I needed to try…"
"By yourself?" He glowered, even as he smoothed the blankets out. "You know better than that Alicia."
"Well, I didn't think I was that weak. The pain medicine is working better than expected." I supposed the fact that I rarely took any growing up played a large part in why that was. "So, it was good. I have a better idea of how I am healing."
"Yeah, while almost busting your chin on your nightstand." His hands shook a bit as he sat down in the nearby chair. I'd scared him. "Please, just rest. I know you want to work, and I know you're worried about the injured, but you're the worst off."
"I wasn't… planning on working…" Not exactly, at least. If I could have made it to the table, I might've tried to make some medicines.
"Then what were you wanting to do?"
"I… I wanted to see Shanan." Shanan was the only person I hadn't seen in the days since I'd first woke up. I'd even seen Seliph, when Chulainn had brought him in for me. But Shanan stayed away and, from my understanding, was completely reclusive. "I wanted to see Shanan. He's my charge."
"Yes, but…" Azel tried to protest, but instead sighed, and gave me a heartbrokenly wry smile. "Okay. I'll bring him here. You stay here."
"Okay…" I caught his sleeve as he left. "I love you, little brother."
"And I love you, big sister." He leaned down to kiss my forehead before walking out, leaving the door open.
I waited, resisting the urge to sigh. Pain filled me and made it so very difficult to breathe. But I laid there, keeping my breath as even as possible. Fighting for my consciousness as the pain tried to take it away. I worried over it. I worried I'd pass out before Azel returned. But thankfully, he did, though he had to physically carry Shanan into the room. That was probably why he'd left the door open.
He set Shanan down in the chair, and left, shutting the door behind him. Shanan was quiet, looking down, and I studied him, worried. He was horribly pale, and far too thin. He didn't look like he'd eaten anything. He didn't look like he'd slept. He did look like he'd bathed, but I had a feeling it was because Ayra had dropped him in a tub and washed him herself. I could see the bandages peeking out of his collar. I saw some on his wrists, and based on how he sat there, digging into his wrists, I knew… I knew that it was something he'd done to himself.
"Hey, Shanan…" I whispered. He flinched at my voice, and I tried to not react. "I'm sorry."
"F-for what?" he whimpered. He still wouldn't look up, but his voice was heavy with unshed tears. "You…"
"Deirdre and I didn't keep our promise." We had told him we'd be 'right back'. We had told him we wouldn't be long. And yet… "So, I'm sorry."
"B-b-but… that was…" His voice cracked and the threatened tears fell. "I… I…"
I managed enough strength to lift the covers and he seized the offer, curling into my side as he broke down in tears. I tried not to wince and whimper, instead just turning so that I could hold him and stroke his hair while he cried.
At some point, Ayra came to check in on us, but by that point, Shanan was fast asleep and I was half. She simply adjusted the blanket on us and let us sleep.
"Gods, these wounds are so jagged…" Lachesis murmured. She held her staff over my unbandaged leg, scooting a little closer so that I didn't quite feel the strain. It was resting in her lap as she worked. "It's like a lightning bolt in the sky, but redder. Angrier."
"And in skin," I half-joked. I winced, though, as Lewyn jostled my arm. "Ah…"
"Sorry, I was losing my grip," Lewyn explained. While Lachesis worked on treating my injuries with healing magic, Lewyn went over the injuries with some herbal medicines he'd learned on his travels. My injuries were just too extensive to focus on one type of treatment alone. "I mentioned I wasn't much of a healer, right?"
"Well, you're the only other one who has healing experience at all," Lachesis pointed out a little sourly. She wilted when Lewyn shot her a look. "I'm sorry. I'm frustrated."
"I know. I am too." He smiled kindly and went back to cleaning the injuries on my arm. "Erinys reported no unusual sightings on her patrol, by the way."
"Oh, thank all that's holy." Lachesis smiled brightly, but it only highlighted how tired she was. With me injured and on bedrest, she was the main healer for all the injured, and there were a lot. "I doubt we'd survive a second assault."
"Very true. But it also means no messengers."
"Were we expecting any? I wasn't."
"Well…" Lewyn finished disinfecting my arm and started bandaging it. He bent the wind around to cool my arm, soothing against the burning pain I felt. The wounds were jagged, red, and a bit swollen. It looked like someone had tried to flay the skin off my bones, and only just failed. "I, personally, was hoping for some ransom note for Deirdre."
"Oh…" Lachesis's smile fell, and her posture slumped. She finished with one of my legs and carefully shifted me so that she could tend to the other. I bit back a whimper as pain shrieked up anyway. My pain medicines were fading. "Yeah, I suppose… that would be good…" She fell silent before looking to me. "Who do you think it was?"
"Well, if you follow logic, Chagall is involved," I replied. Yet, at the same time, that felt… wrong. If it had been Chagall, I was certain we'd have heard something by now. He just seemed like the type to mock people when he thought he'd won. "But if you also follow that logic, then this would be just like Verdane."
"I talked to Jamke about that," Lewyn murmured. His eyes were dark and more than a little sad. I also saw the worry in them, and knew he was wondering the obvious: 'were dark mages hurting his country too?'. "And I suppose it's possible. Seems to fit the idea. Attack suddenly, cause drama, profit off something."
"But what is that something?" That seemed to be the question no one could answer. Just what were they planning. Why start two wars? Why expand Grannvale's influence? Why challenge it? Why kidnap Deirdre? Why, why, why? "There's too little information."
"The worst part is how we have to keep the whole dark magic part quiet." Lewyn tied off the bandage and then shifted to check the injuries on my neck. I tilted my head back to make it easier on him. "Otherwise, you're going to have dozens of people burned at the stake, outcasts turned into scapegoats for convenience."
"Surely not…" Lachesis half-heartedly protested. She frowned over one of my wounds and turned her attention to it. A quick look showed it was swollen and red on the edges, suggesting infection. "There would be a fair trial…"
"Since no one has any idea what dark magic does? They'll give the most ridiculous of defenses," Lewyn countered firmly. He started cleaning the ones on my neck, giving me a sympathetic smile when I winced from pain. "I remember reading about some in the past. One's accusers included things like 'oh, it was their spirit who did those things'! And that can't be disproven."
"Is it not innocent until proven guilty?"
"Mass hysteria turns it into 'guilty until proven innocent'." Lewyn sat back in his chair, smiling bitterly. There was an exhaustion to his eyes too, but it felt different, far more worried. I wondered if he ran because he was far too scared of what 'mass hysteria' his uncles would try to use. He feared what they had done in his absence. "I think we can get away with no bandages to your neck. I think the majority of your wounds were to your torso."
"Makes sense," I replied. I lowered my head to smile at him. "We'll see how it goes."
"Seems like the name of the game for all of this," Lewyn noted. He leaned back in his chair, and smiled back. "All we have to do is wait and pray."
"I suppose." A thought occurred to me. "Did anyone ever tell Sigurd what happened here?"
"The red and green knights left to tell him."
"Has anyone reassured him that we're alive?"
"Finn left to do that."
"No wonder Lachesis is sour, then." I had to tease. It was worth her squeaking and blushing. "That does remind me. How is that relationship going?" I glanced at Lewyn. "You may also tell me how you and Erinys are making up. I'm assuming you are. You better be, at least."
"That… that is off limits!" Lewyn's face went red, but there was a conflicted look on his face. Clearly, there were still talks that needed to be done. "But, whatever. Let's talk about the beautiful golden princess and her blue knight in shining armor. I could make a song of it!"
Lachesis instantly squawked a protest, even as she continued carefully tending to my legs, but Lewyn ignored her to compose a song on the spot. I laughed for the first time since Deirdre was kidnapped, though it ended up with me having a coughing fit and struggling for breath. But I didn't care, and begged Lewyn to continue. I needed that laughter. Deirdre would've been so sad if she'd known I stopped laughing.
"Absolutely not!" Chulainn's voice didn't tilt to yelling, but the glower he wore and the intensity of his voice gave all the implications anyway. "It's far too dangerous."
"It's no more dangerous than any other time I stayed in camp while you all went fighting!" I snapped back. I glared up at him, struggling to keep on my feet. What had started as a simple walk through the gardens to gather more strength had turned into an argument I didn't have the stamina for. "Which I've done numerous times!"
"Not while this wounded!"
"As if that matters!"
"And the camp could become a battle at any moment!"
"You mean like the castle did?!" I almost said more. I had the thought. But that bit of strain was enough to tip me over. I started coughing and my knees buckled.
Chulainn caught me instantly, though, and half-picked me up to ease the strain on my legs. "…This isn't the time for arguing…" His voice was soft now, guilty. My own anger surged, though. "Come on. Let's get you back to-"
"I am tired of that blasted bed!" I hated it. I hated being trapped there, suffocating. I hated having only blankets and pain. "Besides, it's cold."
"We'll get you more blankets."
"That's not what I meant!" I glared up at him again, but then looked away, realizing how childish I was being. "Wait, no, that's not-"
"…Clearly, we needed to talk a while ago." Chulainn picked me up gently and carried me to a nearby bench. But instead of setting me on it, he sat down and settled me in his lap. I instinctively leaned against him, tucking my head under his chin so that I could hear his heartbeat. "Now, then… ignoring the camp thing for now."
"Mmm…"
"I've upset you, and then upset you further by arguing." He kissed the top of my head, and held me a little tighter. The wind blew gently, carrying cold and the smell of flowers. Winter was on the way, though it was still a ways off. "So, what is it?"
"That's…" I didn't want to explain, feeling mortified, but the silence stretched on, with him clearly waiting for a response. "…Lonely…"
"Lonely?" He sounded confused, and a bit of exasperation spiked through me. "But there's always someone with you. Friends, your little brother…"
"Oh, you complete dunce!" I leaned up to kiss him before breaking away, glowering. "One, I miss Deirdre. Terribly. Two, you are never around." I settled back against him, not bothering to try and figure out his expression. "You're always out on patrols or hanging with Ayra or something. You barely see me."
"That's…"
"So, I'm dealing with injuries, I'm dealing with my best friend being kidnapped, and my lover keeps his distance. I'm lonely and cranky." I glowered up at him again. "Then I tell you that I want to move to the camp, like I normally do, to do my job, and you go yelling!"
"…Ah." For a long time, that was all he said, but my temper had cooled enough that I could see he was just trying to get his thoughts in order. He threaded his fingers through my hair and slowly ran his hand through. It was a soothing motion and I leaned into him again, still waiting. "Well, first, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for hurting your feelings."
"Mmm…" I relaxed then, and I felt myself smile. "So…"
"I've been patrolling in the hopes that I could find some sign of the attackers, or perhaps signs of Deirdre." He kept running his hand through my hair, speaking soothingly. "I've been spending time with Ayra because… well…" His hand paused briefly before resuming. "I used Luna. To get here faster."
"You did?" Now that he mentioned it, I did vaguely recall Lewyn mentioning Chulainn 'cutting through armor'. "Oh, but that means…"
"Yeah, she figured it out. So, she's been ambushing me to try to catch up. I then distract her until I can find Lex or Lachesis to hide around."
"I see."
"And for spending time away…" He hesitated again, and this time, he tilted my head up to kiss me gently. "Part of that was selfishness. You're in so much pain and there's nothing I can do."
"Yes, you can." I sulked as he pulled away. "You can just be there. It's relaxing. Comforting." A thought occurred to me. "Oh, but I guess I wouldn't have been very good company. I spend a lot of time…"
"Whimpering and crying out in pain, and nothing I can do." His fingers trailed down my cheek before lingering on some of the wounds on my neck. "The first night after you woke up, I did try. But even trying to hold you caused pain, so I kept my distance."
"Oh…"
"But when you started recovering, I should've asked if it would be okay."
"…And I should've told you I was lonely." I sighed and tucked myself under his chin more. "But you can't keep me from doing my job."
"…No, of course not." He tightened his hold on me, but let up when I winced from pain. "Of course not. And I shouldn't even try. I love how devoted you are to your work, even if it worries me. But I want you safe. I want you to be safe. I never want you to be so injured again."
"But nowhere is safe, really." It simply wasn't. "Oh, gods… we'd have to take Shanan and Seliph with us."
"You can't bring a baby to a war camp."
"That… that man who kidnapped Deirdre almost killed Seliph. He only didn't because Shanana turned away in time." I still remembered that scream. It haunted my nightmares just as much as Deirdre's. "We can't leave him here. There's too many injured to defend the castle."
"That's…" He tried to protest, but there wasn't really one. We knew the risks of… all of it. I was badly hurt and wouldn't really be able to defend myself if something went wrong. Shanan and Seliph would also be unable. Shanan and Seliph would be stuck amidst the chaos of a war camp. "Damn it."
"I know. Everything is a huge mess." I curled into him a little more, feeling so tired and lost. I missed Deirdre. I missed having my biggest worry just being the injured. "Stay with me. Please."
"Always." He kissed the top of my head. "But you really do need to go rest."
"Fine."
"How are you holding up?" Erinys asked me, shifting to make sure I was secure. There had been quite some debate on how I would travel, with it eventually being decided that Erinys's pegasus would be the smoothest ride. "Do you need me to stop?"
"We're almost there, right?" I asked, leaning against her. While I'd tried to look down and admire the view, it only took two seconds before I was entirely too panicky and light-headed. "I can make it."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes." I managed a smile for her, but I did have to admit that my pain medicine was fading. It didn't help that I'd taken less, hoping to wean myself off it. "I can make it."
"Okay." She smiled back. "When you're better, I'll take you for a proper ride."
"That sounds good." Though I was fairly certain I wouldn't take her up on it. We were just far too high for my liking. I liked my feet on the ground. "How far ahead are we?"
"We're not bound by the road, so…" She glanced back and down, still smiling. "So, we're a good ways ahead, from the looks of it."
"I see." I briefly looked down, but I felt lightheaded again, so I just kept my eyes closed. "So, by the way, how are things with Lewyn?"
"Well, he's talking to me! As you saw when we were leaving." She laughed, delighted, but I felt so bad. She was just so happy to not be ignored. "He won't listen to my arguments to return, though, and he won't explain himself. We talk around it a lot."
"When things calm down, lock him in a room and make him talk."
"Now that is a thought." She laughed again, eyes dancing. "Okay, we're coming over the camp, so we'll descend now."
"Okay." I held onto her as tightly as I dared as we dropped from the sky, the wind rushing past us. I winced as my wounds protested the wind, but I did my best to hide it from Erinys.
She seemed to know anyway, though, as when we landed, she instantly dismounted and helped me down. "Stay here. I'll get someone." She gave me another quick smile and darted off, easily meandering through the busy camp.
Soldiers and pages were racing about, delivering messages or carrying weapons. The sounds of laughter and shouts echoed through. The smell of blood, ale, sweat, and cooking food wafted about. The sight… well, it was just a normally camp. Tents lied in a neat fashion, organized to make things easy. But I saw how they stumbled as they moved. I saw how pale they were. Tired. They were all so tired.
"Alicia!" But, of course, from the camp, Sigurd came running, waving to catch my attention. "Alicia!" Sigurd stopped just short of me, sliding a bit in the mud. He looked… a wreck. Pale, with bloodshot and puffy eyes. Disheveled. "Hi," he greeted. He shifted on his feet, strangely hesitant. "May… may I hug you?" His eyes darted to the bandages I still wore.
"Just be gentle, Sigurd," I whispered. Stiffly, I held out my arms. "I'm afraid I'm still quite injured."
"Right…" Carefully, he pulled me into a hug, holding me like he was afraid I'd break. "Gods, when we got the message… when we heard that you were… that…" He gave up talking, and just rested his head on mine. "I'm glad you're alive."
"I'm sorry about Deirdre."
"She lives. We'll find her again. I'm just grateful everyone is alive."
"Talk to Shanan when you get a chance. He's…"
"I will." I stepped away, and looked at him again. "…Seliph said his first word."
"Did he?" He laughed, but it sounded hollow. His smile was also bitter. "I'm sad I missed that."
"Well, you'll see his other 'firsts' I'm sure, and it's not like he quite knows what the word means yet." I tried to shrug, but winced instead. My injuries were keening. "It was 'mama' by the way."
"Of course." This time, I caught tears in his eyes just before he looked away. "Ah, thank you for the warning. I… uh…"
"You would've broken down without that warning." I reached up and patted his head. He managed another laugh, but it was still hollow. "I'm sorry. I couldn't…"
"You're alive." He repeated the words firmly, and he looked at me again. His eyes wavered with the unshed tears, but this time, his smile was genuine. "You're alive. Seliph is alive. Shanan is alive. I consider myself very blessed, truthfully. And she was only kidnapped."
"…Right." I smiled back then. "Well, I fear I must rest. I can't go scolding you about the infirmary for a while."
"I live for the day you're recovered enough to do that." He gave me another hug, still gentle, and then stepped back, his eyes darting to someone else. It took all of two seconds to realize it was Sylvia, who greeted me with a kiss to the cheek and a gentle tug to show me where I'd be resting.
As she walked me through camp, she rattled off various bits of camp gossip, likely to distract me. I didn't retain most of it, but I did note that Aideen wasn't here. She, Midir, and King Jamke were still in Madino, left behind there to keep an eye on the pirates. There had, indeed, been some attacks to villages, so they were the safeguard. After all, Sigurd would never leave anyone to fend for themselves.
She got me to a tent, the items inside implying it was Chulainn's and someone had hastily moved out to make room for me, and promptly left, leaving me alone. But not for long. Ethlyn appeared, giving me a quite little hug, before sitting down. "So, welcome to camp," she greeted, forcing cheer. "Let's get you looked at, okay?"
"Yes, that sounds good," I murmured. I shifted to try and get a little more comfortable, and instinctively reached for my pack. But it wasn't here. It, my staves, and Deirdre's Silence were all with the 'main group'. "How go things here?"
"We don't know." She shrugged, undoing my bandages to assess the wounds herself. She winced when she saw them. "Eldigan won't retreat, but no one wants to fight. So, we're in some sort of standoff while we desperately try to avoid a fight."
"Have messengers been sent to King Chagall?"
"While Eldigan let them through, the guards at the actual castle… fort… whatever…" She sighed, resting her head on my shoulder briefly. She, like everyone, was grey with exhaustion. Everyone was just so tired. "They don't. Chagall refuses."
"I see." I tried to pat her shoulder or something, but my arms protested the movement. I'd overextended for the day. So, instead, I gently bumped my head against hers. "Well, I guess we'll see what happens then."
I predicted pain, though. I saw no way for this to end without pain. But I supposed we could hope to be wrong.
Author's notes: Technically speaking, there's pirate attacks on all the villages during most of this map in game, but I'm limiting their range slightly for convenience. Also in game, after Madino's capture, Eldigan and his Cross Knights start marching and attacking. I'm also having them be hesitant for convenience sake. The whole 'maybe your spirit did it' thing is based off a show of The Crucible, a play based off the Salem Witch Trials, I'd seen.
Next Chapter – Eldigan the Lionheart
