I had planned to have this one ready before the end of March, but once again real life got in the way. Sorry for the delay :(

Happy Easter to those who celebrate it. And to those who don't, Happy Holidays :)

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Steps

It had rained for most of the previous day, and thus the heat was more manageable than usual. Touji was thankful for that, as he had too much on his mind. The last thing he needed was the usual sticky, humid weather of Tokyo-3. He was so preoccupied that he barely paid attention to Kensuke's rants.

"…asked for a refund! Can you believe it? Kimura and his whole gang!"

They were in their usual spot, but Touji couldn't care less about business. The brawl still occupied his mind, even though two days had passed already.

"I had to give them money from my allowance, because I had already spent theirs!"

The fight itself didn't worry Touji too much. He had been in dozens, if not hundreds of scuffles over the years, in school and out. Returning home with a black eye or a bloody nose was common for him, and he didn't care about the repercussions. Besides, Hikari had scolded him already, and he had survived. Nothing worse could happen to him.

"And they weren't the only ones! We've been losing money since last Thursday!"

What Touji couldn't take out of his mind, no matter how hard he tried, was their conversation in that bathroom. Sohryu had thanked him; once, and in her own devil-like way, but she had thanked him.

And, as much as he hated to admit it, she could put up a fight.

"Seriously, man; the one time I needed Sohryu to win…"

"Ken, let's stop."

The glasses almost fell off Kensuke's nose. He stared at his old friend, mouth agape.

"What?" he asked. "Now? No way, man; we need to double down if we want to make a profit this month! We have to find new clients, ones who don't care about Sohryu's fiasco, or–"

"Ken."

A shiver ran down his spine. Touji was using that tone, the one he only used when he had been thinking hard about something. Kensuke knew that, whatever his old friend was about to say, it would be final.

"Sohryu doesn't deserve this."

That, however, caught him by surprise.

"What do you mean?" Kensuke asked. "You said the other day that she does! She's a bitch, remember?"

Touji sighed, and his gaze got lost in the distance.

"I don't know anymore," he said. "I'm starting to think that she might not be so bad after all."

"So she's not the Red Devil?"

"Oh no, she is still a devil, and I don't know how Shin-man can stand her; but she's not a bitch." Touji looked at his friend with almost pleading eyes. "Come on, dude; let's put an end to this. I… I don't feel right doing this anymore."

Kensuke looked at the many pictures of Asuka in his hands. He couldn't deny that, from a technical point of view, he was proud of them. They were good pictures, considering he'd had to take them from a safe distance, hidden and with home cameras.

He had never stopped to think how he felt about the whole thing, though.

"Besides," Touji said. "Shinji and her seem to be getting along better. We can't do this to him."

Kensuke sighed, defeated, and made a choice. After all, they were barely making money anyway.

"Yeah, I guess we'd be pretty shitty friends," and he tore the pictures. Then, he smiled. "Not to mention, now that Shinji is learning to fight, we'd better be careful. Can you imagine what he'd do to us if he found out?"


With a quick movement of his feet, Shinji closed the distance between him and Sosuke and threw a punch. Of course, the swordsman with fifteen years of fighting experience at his back had no problem blocking it. Still, he did so with joy. His new student was making progress, and fast.

"Good job!" he said. "Let's take a break."

A panting Shinji sat on the grass, near the cabin's door, and grabbed two bottles of water from a bag. Sosuke didn't join him. Instead, he walked a couple of meters away, took out his phone and talked for a while. Shinji made no attempt to eavesdrop. He felt that it would be disrespectful, especially after Mr. Oshiba had agreed to train him.

A little bit later, Sosuke hung up and sat next to the kid.

"Three so far."

"Three what?" Shinji asked as he passed him a water bottle.

"Three groups of dirtballs who were planning to kidnap you, or any of the other pilots. Ryoji and my Section-2 mates just put the third one behind bars."

"Oh. Good to know."

Sosuke's bottle stopped midway to his mouth, and he raised the eyebrow of his one good eye.

"It does upset me," Shinji said, sensing his trainer's surprise, "but I'm not going to worry about that. I guess there'll always be bad people out there, no matter what we do; so I'll just focus on fighting for the good people, and for those I care about. When I can pilot the Eva again, I'll do it for those who are important to me."

Oshiba smiled. His new junior was growing not only in body, but also in mind. He was taken back to many years in the past, to those days when he had trained an equally promising, if harder to deal with, Ryoji Kaji. He took a sip, lost for a moment in memories of times gone by. Not good times, sadly. The first years after Second Impact had been many things, but "good" wasn't one of them, despite how everything had turned out in the end.

He noticed, then, that Shinji was throwing quick and nervous glances at him, while fiddling with his bottle.

"You want to know about the eye." Not a question. The kid shrunk in embarrassment and nodded in silence. Sosuke, however, simply chuckled. "I thought you'd never ask. Demons ate it."

Shinji stared at his trainer, his mouth agape, but not too much. His face didn't grow pale, nor did he overreact, even though he almost choked on his own breath. His surprise was measured, calculated to not arise suspicion. Ever since the start of his demonic situation, he had gotten good at it.

"They looked like humans at first," Sosuke continued, "but that was only a trick to lure us into a false sense of security."

"Us?"

Oshiba took out his locket and opened it. Shinji saw, once again, the picture of that woman with long brown couldn't remember her name, though; only that it started with an A.

"Akane Nanjo." Sosuke said, as if reading his thoughts. "They took my eye after ripping out her heart."

The ambience turned cold, despite the eternal summer. Shinji focused on his bottle again, not daring to interrupt the tale.

"I killed one of them." Sosuke continued. "The other, I wounded enough to make it flee, but I had to spend two months in the hospital after that. And these were small fries, not like the big ones you've seen here. Just as malevolent, though." He put away the locket and took another sip. "That's why I don't hold any grudge towards the Sohryu girl for not catching that giant bat. I'm a seasoned swordsman, I can take on five armed enemies at the same time; and yet I barely survived against a couple small demons. I don't want to imagine how hard it must be to fight the large ones, even with your robots. My respect goes to you," he pointed a finger "You Children. I'll slice anyone who insults you."

Recalling the incident with the kidnappers, Shinji hoped Sosuke would never learn about Kimura. Not even he and his lackeys deserved such a fate. Besides, they had bled enough already. Asuka and Touji had made sure of that.

"I have to confess something," Oshiba added. "One of the reasons why I joined Section-2 and took this job was because you're fighting demons. I want to see you kill all of them. All of them."

Shinji noticed that Sosuke's grip on his bottle was tightening. His only eye was fixated on some random point beyond the trees, and he could see the flames of anger dancing in it.

Flames of hatred and pain.

"Um…" Shinji spoke. "All of them? What if there are good demons out there?"

"No such thing," he said, snickering and spitting on the ground. "They're monsters, hiding among us to attack when we least expect it. They will murder your friends and family for fun and force you to watch before killing you too."

"But… I mean…"

Alas, no matter how hard Shinji tried to think of an argument, the image of Sosuke witnessing the death of his girlfriend, or perhaps wife, flashed in his mind. His imagination made it worse each time. He didn't feel he had the right to argue, to challenge Sosuke's point of view, even though Shinji knew he was wrong. Besides, it would mean revealing his secret to yet another person, and while he had grown to trust the swordsman, Shinji preferred not to take any chances.

For a while, they said nothing. Eventually, Sosuke took a deep breath and relaxed.

"You're a good kid," he said. "Perhaps too good. Follow my advice here: when you get back into your big purple robot, if you have a demon under your gun, do not hesitate. Do not let them deceive you. Do not give them any chance to hurt those you love. Kill them."

Shinji just nodded, not wishing to continue the conversation.

The training resumed shortly after.


A woman, a girl and a penguin dug into their dinner, which that night consisted of pizza, chips and some drinks to wash it all down.

They ate in silence. Again.

Misato almost couldn't hide her disappointment. The 'girl time' during Shinji's absence wasn't working as well as she had expected. Asuka barely talked to her, other than a few sentences about school and maybe the synch tests, and that was only when Misato asked. Be it at dinner, at breakfast or when she accepted to sit down on the couch and watch TV; Asuka didn't have much to say, or she just didn't want to talk.

The can of beer touched her lips. Misato took two slow gulps, her eyes focused on her ward as she munched on some chips. It was Thursday again. A whole week without Shinji, and they had made no progress at all. Did Asuka not trust her, after that one night of drunken sincerity? Or was it precisely because she had been drunk?

Well, she wasn't now, and there is no time like the present. Or so they say.

She left the can on the table.

"I heard you, Shinji and that Suzuhara boy beat up some jerks at school."

Asuka, who was about to take another bite off her slice, stopped. Her eyes reflected surprise for just an instant, but she quickly recovered and threw a somewhat defiant, but not hostile, glare.

"Took you long enough. That happened on Monday," She said, taking a bite.

"Oh, I've known about it since then. Rei informed your principal that those bullies had started it, and with a bit of nudging from Nerv, you won't be suspended nor expelled. You're welcome." She waited for some thankful words, but Asuka just rolled her eyes and kept chewing. "Anyway, I didn't bring it up before because I thought maybe you needed some time to calm down." She changed her tone of voice to a more, for lack of a better word, motherly one. "I'm so sorry about what happened. Of all the things they could've put in your locker…"

"It was a coincidence, alright?" Asuka drank from her glass. "Those clowns used a doll because it was cheap to buy I guess, and nothing more. All they know about me were whatever perverted fantasies they used to have." She snickered. "I bet they won't be fantasying anymore now!"

A smile. Sort of malevolent, yes; but it was enough to ease Misato. Perhaps conversation would be possible, after all.

"So, how are the classes doing?" she asked.

"Fine."

"And the new teacher?"

"Too much homework." Asuka ate another chip.

"Well, make sure you finish it all before bed. And keep practicing your kanji. Your marks have improved, but they could still be better."

"Bite me."

"Nah, I'd get food poisoning."

"Oh, look who's talking."

"Speaking of food, is Rei still eating lunch with you at school?"

"Of course she is!"

"I see. That's good." Misato still hadn't touched her slice. "Oh, by the way, how's Shinji doing in the pool?"

Asuka, who had been chewing slower for the past seconds, swallowed and left her portion, unfinished, on the plate.

"Alright, what's going on?" she asked. "Why this sudden interrogation?"

"It's not an interrogation. I've asked you many questions over these past nights."

"But you're nosier today."

Misato's flight-or-fight response activated. She held her ward's gaze, and for a moment she thought about denying everything and giving any excuse she could think about. But what would be the point of it? Asuka had already seen her drunk; she had heard her uninhibited rambles. It would be cowardly to keep pretending at that point. That girl didn't deserve such a thing.

"I just want to show you that I care," Misato said. "I might've been hammered that night, but what I said was true."

Asuka looked down and resumed eating, again chewing slowly. A knot formed in Misato's stomach. They were barely a meter apart, but it felt like a vast chasm. But, refusing to give up, she tried again:

"Look, I know I wasn't the best guardian back in Germany. Let's be honest, I'm starting to doubt I'm a good guardian here and now, but…" she grabbed the can, not to drink, but because she needed a support. Anything. "I just thought it would be nice if we could get to know each other better these days. Girl time, you know?"

She forced a smile, but Asuka barely reacted. Even Pen-pen noticed the change of mood, and his gaze shifted from one woman to the other.

"You already know me," the girl said, still not making eye contact. "You know all about me. But it happened a long time ago, so we shouldn't worry. Right?"

It took Misato a while to recognize her own words. Longer that she would like to admit, in fact. After the initial shock, she lowered her head, in painful but silent defeat.

"I guess I'm the only one to blame, then," she raised the can to her lips. "Too little too late, right?"

The chasm could not be crossed, it seemed. All she could hope for was a formal, if somewhat cold, tolerance from the kid she had failed already.

Asuka rose from the table, plate in hand.

"I'll finish in my room, if you don't mind."

Any other night, Misato would've told her to sit down and eat in the kitchen, like a proper Japanese daughter; but at that moment, she couldn't. There was no point, and she didn't want to make things worse.

"I care about you," she repeated, in a whisper, as Asuka walked past her. "I really do. As much as I care about Shinji. I just I wanted to give you two a better adolescence than I had, despite everything. Or, at least, try."

Asuka didn't stop, and her steps sounded more distant with each passing second. Misato was left in a silent kitchen, with Pen-pen as her only company. And it was there, after yet another night of failure, when a doubt slithered into her mind.

Whose adolescence was she trying to help, really? Did she take Shinji and Asuka in for their sake? Or for hers?

"Hey."

Misato turned around. Asuka was peeking from the corridor, not making eye contact.

"You're right," she said. "You were a shitty guardian in Germany, and you're a shitty guardian now. But you're trying, and your heart is in the right place. So, thanks for that. And thanks for letting me live here. I know you care."

And she disappeared, perhaps a bit too fast, as if she feared what would happen if that conversation were to continue.

Misato let her get away. It wasn't as much progress as she wanted, but it was enough for the night. She turned to face her food, now almost cold, but she couldn't bring herself to eat. The doubt was still boring through her mind.

"Is my heart truly in the right place, Pen-pen?"

The penguin stopped sipping from his beer and replied with a confused wark.


Tokyo-3 looked beautiful at night. Once, Asuka had expressed her love for the city lights, even if they blocked the view of the stars. While Shinji still didn't agree with that, he conceded that she had a point. Maybe it was because he hadn't slept down there for a week already, and he missed it.

Or maybe it was because it was his first time looking at the city from the top of a tree.

"Ready for another try?" Ura asked, perched next to him.

Shinji flapped his wings a couple of times, still not used to the extra bones and muscle on his back.

"Yes."

He took off, just as she had taught him. First up, towards the starry sky, and then descending in spiral. The flights couldn't last for too long, since there was always the danger that some night hiker could record them with a camera. Improbable, but not impossible. So, he glided back to the privacy and safety of the trees, to practice his low flight.

Then he hit his head on a branch.

He ended face-down on the earth, the failure hurting more than the actual crash. Shinji spat some grass, brushed the dirt off and stood up, while Ura landed close, fighting back giggles.

"Don't worry," she said. "I hit my head against many branches when I was young; it's all part of the learning experience."

He smiled, and was about to reply, when he saw her approaching.

"Once you recover your memories, it'll be much easier," Medusa said.

Ever since Shinji had unlocked his new form, she had insisted on being present during his flight lessons. Her eyes were always fixated on him, and she often smiled or even winked whenever he looked at her. She seemed to hold no grudge for having been thrown against a tree, and took every chance to get closer to him and talk about "his" old life. Shinji had asked her to stop twice already; but with no avail.

"You think this is hard?" Medusa continued. "You don't remember it, but the first time you had to learn to fly in the underground." She chuckled. "You broke so many stalactites…"

Ura stepped back, keeping her distance from the other demoness, even though Medusa had promised to Shinji that she wouldn't attack anyone. As for him, he ignored her words, offering no response. He even looked away, giving clear signals that he didn't wish to speak with her.

It didn't work, and Medusa approached even further, eyeing Shinji from his horns, to the wings and the tail. The locks of her hair wriggled a little, as if they, or she, were excited.

"There was this one time," she said. "We were with Astaroth and Baal, training, and you were impatient that day, so…"

Shinji paid no attention to her story, just to her hand. She had extended it, absent-mindedly it seemed, and was getting too close to him. To his head. To his hair.

He slapped it away.

"Don't touch me. Please." He almost didn't add the 'please.'

Medusa's smile didn't falter. For the last days, nothing Shinji did, not even his constant rejections, could sour her mood.

"I think you need to rest," she said. "You've done a lot of work today. Perhaps tomorrow we'll have more luck."

And with that, not even acknowledging Ura's presence, Medusa turned around and walked away, until she disappeared in the darkness.

Not before looking back a couple of times. At him.

Only when he was sure that she was far away and couldn't hear them, only then Shinji groaned, sighed, cursed his luck and sat down on the grass, burying his face in his knees. He hugged his legs, shivering.

"I'm scared, Miss Ura."

She sat, too, and put an arm-wing around him.

"Of what?"

"That she might be right. That I might be Dante."

Ura tightened the embrace, pulling Shinji even closer. She ran her other hand through his hair, just as she had done to her daughters many times, in moments of heartbreaks, stress or dejection.

"Why is that?" she asked.

"Because…" he raised his head a little. "If that's the case, then who is Shinji Ikari?" But the shadows provided no answers, just the whistling of the night breeze. "These fourteen years of my life, all the experiences, all I have learned, all the people I've met… were they for nothing? Will everything be meaningless once I recover my supposed memories? Asuka and Misato, do they care for a person who doesn't exist? I…" he trembled again, sucking air through his teeth. "I just don't know what to do."

Before he could crumble any further, Ura embraced him fully, with both arms, and began to rock him back and forth.

"Sssssh," she cooed. "It's alright."

Foggy memories flashed in Shinji's mind, too fast for him to register them properly. A soothing voice, and that familiar smile once again, from long ago. The same woman his brain refused to fully recall, or just couldn't; but it was enough to soothe him.

"I'm sorry," Shinji said, sniffling.

"No need to apologize. You're going through a lot right now."

He brushed off his tears. His eyes got lost somewhere in the darkness far away. Ura had an idea of where.

"You miss them, don't you?"

"Yeah," Shinji nodded. "I mean, I do get to see Asuka and Rei at school; but for seven days I've only talked with Misato through the phone."

"Don't worry, it's normal." She let him go, since he seemed more calmed; but remained by his side. "You know, I had my own doubts when I adopted my girls. I'm aware it's not exactly the same situation. Yours is pretty unique, after all. But I asked myself, for many days, who I really was. A demon? A mother? A traitor to my race?"

Ura joined Shinji in looking into the darkness, thinking about the city on the other side of the trees, where her family was.

"I didn't feel like myself," she continued. "A whole life hating humans, and then taking care of three? Who was I? Had I become someone different? It didn't help when I had to take a human identity, get a human job, and teach my girls to don't tell anyone about my true nature. I felt like an impostor, on so many levels. I wondered if the old me had died too in the Second Impact, and if a phony had taken her place." She took a deep breath. "But I eventually found an answer."

"What was it?"

"I am me. No matter how much I might change, I'll always be me." She patted his head one more time. "Whatever happens in the future, you will be you, regardless if you have been alive for fourteen years or six thousand. Shinji Ikari will only be meaningless if you let him be. If you abandon him."

He gave himself a moment to think about those words.

"So," he asked, "keep fighting, no matter how hard it gets?"

"I guess you can see it that way."

"Mmh…" Shinji scratched the ground with his talons and sniffled one last time. "Yeah. I can do that. I'll keep fighting." He then chuckled. "It sounds like something Asuka would say."

"I can believe it. From what Saori has told me, she has the will and ferocity of a demon. No wonder you like her so much."

Shinji's face turned red at the speed of sound. He stood up, tripped, fell and then stood up again.

"It's not like that!" he said, after babbling incoherently. "I mean… I do like her, but as a friend! We're just friends!"

"Uh?" Confused, Ura put a finger on her chin. "That's weird. According to Saori, everyone in class calls you 'the newlyweds.'"

And now, he was blushing so much that the demonic marks on his cheeks were no longer visible. Ura laughed, covering her mouth and giving him and apologetic look. She couldn't help it. Despite having the powers of the King of Demons, Shinji was still a fourteen-year old boy. She found it adorable.

A beam of light shone on them. They turned and saw Kaji approaching, holding a flashlight in one hand. In the other, a platter with two cups of steaming, hot chocolate.

"Hello, Miss Ura."

"Greetings, Mister Spy."

They looked at each other, in silence, for a few seconds. Then, smiling, he sighed and shook his head.

"Nope. Sorry, but talking to a bird-person still feels weird. No offense."

"None taken." Ura stood up and grabbed one of the offered cups.

"Anyway; Shinji," he addressed the kid. "Ritsuko just called. She wants you in the GeoFront tomorrow after class. She says she has a surprise for you."


Friday arrived to Japan, at last, and it didn't come alone.

Up in the sky, a colossal black plane carried a precious cargo. It hung from the machine's belly, kept in place by thick cables of steel and encased in a crimson crucifix.

Evangelion Unit-03 slept, uncaring of the world around it.

Of the cumulonimbus they were flying through.

Of the thing latching onto it and creeping under its armor.


The plugsuit felt weird against his skin. So did the controls in his hands and the clips in his hair. Little more than two weeks had passed, but he had almost forgotten the sensations.

The LCL was just as disgusting as he remembered, though.

"Are you ready?" Ritsuko's voice arrived through the comm. channel.

"Yes."

"Then we're going to begin. Do what you usually do in normal synch tests; we'll take care of the rest."

He closed his eyes and focused, searching for that connection with the machine. He tried not to think about his conversation with Asuka, where they had discussed the true nature of the Evangelions. If there was truly Angel flesh inside Unit-01, Shinji didn't want to anger it.

So, with great effort, he calmed down and pretended that he was back to the time before the demons, when the Evas were just Evas. He called for whatever it was that made the giant tick.

Nothing answered.

Nothing happened.

He felt nothing.

Shinji sighed, and bubbles escaped his mouth. He opened his eyes, ready to apologize to Ritsuko for wasting everyone's time; but only a gasp came out.

He could see the cage. He could see the rails, and the technicians in orange jumpsuits, and the cranes they often used to move damaged parts. The walls of the entry plug showed him the world through the eyes of Unit-01.

"Connection established!" he heard Maya saying. "Synch rate stable at 33.8%"

"Better than we predicted," that was Ritsuko. "Shinji, concentrate on raising the Eva's left hand."

He did as instructed. Once again, nothing seemed to happen. He didn't feel the tingling, the signal that the Eva could receive his thoughts. Shinji looked at his left, at the red liquid his Unit was often submerged in. Worries began to stir in his stomach; but about ten seconds later, ripples appeared in the surface. A giant knuckle rose from it, very slowly, and then the rest of the hand. Its movements were awkward, almost unfocused.

Shinji heard cheers coming through the comm. channel, and despite his own feelings regarding the Evangelions, he found himself joining the celebration.

"Amazing!" he said. "This is amazing! How did you do it, Miss Ritsuko?"


"Dummy plug? What's that?"

After the test, Ritsuko had taken them to one of the many conference rooms. She was showing them some schematics in the main screen, with so many numbers and formulas that Shinji couldn't understand a thing.

"In short, it's an artificial pilot," she explained. Then, upon seeing Asuka about to yell, she raised a hand. "Before you get hysterical: no, we're not planning on replacing you. Sending dummies against the Angels would be a suicide. They can't adapt and improvise the way you kids do, at least not with our current technology. However, in the event that you are knocked out, they will keep the Eva functioning, and you alive, until the threat has been dealt with. In theory, at least."

Another lie. Ritsuko knew that Gendo's original plan for the dummies was exactly that, to make the pilots obsolete, to not depend on fourteen-year olds and their chaotic, hormonal nature. She hoped to turn them into something better: a tool so that Shinji could officially join the battlefield again.

The first step in her long road to redemption, mayhaps.

"How does it work?" Shinji asked.

"Think of it as a relay station. The Dummy plug receives your thought patterns and sends them to the Eva. We've used it to 'patch' your connection with Unit-01, so to speak. But, as I'm sure you've noticed, it's not perfect. Far from it, there's a considerable delay between thought and reaction, and the Eva's movements are sluggish."

"Oh…" he hunched. "So I still can't go into battle."

"Not like you used to, but once we improve the system, you'll be able to provide cover fire from a safe distance. It's better than nothing. Make no mistake; this is just a temporary solution, until we can fully solve the problem."

A warmth arose in Shinji's stomach. It was an unusual experience, to be happy that he could pilot that infernal machine once again; but any discomfort was drowned by the excitement.

"Well, look who's back!" Asuka nudged him. "I bet you're rusty from two weeks of vacation, so get ready for extra training!"

"I too am glad to have you back," Rei said.

The plugsuit no longer felt weird against his skin, and he didn't mind the smell of LCL that much. His worries, the demons, SEELE and everything else seemed far away, like an unpleasant dream. Shinji knew it wouldn't last. He knew all those things were outside, waiting for him; but he didn't care. Not at that moment. Not for just a little while.

A hand landed on his shoulder, familiar and kind. A hand he hadn't felt in a week. He looked up, meeting with Misato's smiling face.

"Welcome back, Shinji."

He had missed it so much.

"So, Rits;" Misato said, changing the subject. "Are you going to put those dummy things in all the Units?"

"So far, only Eva-01 has it. But yes, in time, we'll install it in all the Evas, including in Unit-03, which should be in the Matsuhiro base," Ritsuko checked her wristwatch. "About fifteen minutes ago. All we need now is to find a pilot."

"You ordered an Eva to be transferred before assigning it a pilot?"

"It's been some busy weeks, Misato. I don't know if you've noticed, but there are giant demons roaming our streets."

Shinji didn't pay attention to the rest of their discussion. His mind was set in the immediate future. How long would it take for Ritsuko to perfect the system? Two days? Another week? It was irrelevant. All that mattered to him was that, at last, he could go back. He wouldn't need to transform, he could help Asuka and Rei without having to make up more lies.

His time as the King of Demons was coming to a close, so it seemed.


Away from Tokyo-3, behind a mountain range and under a hill, the laboratory had been forgotten and abandoned for over a decade. That day, however, the machines were beeping and humming once again. A certain old man went from flickering screen to flickering screen, reading the data and adjusting the devices as he saw fit.

Dr. Rainuma had been working tirelessly since moving, to the amazement of the few guards stationed there. Up until meeting him, they had thought nobody in the world could match Ritsuko Akagi's work routine. He, of course, didn't pay attention to them, nor did he care about their opinions. Even when the Commander of Nerv walked through the door and stood next to him, he barely reacted. All of his attention was on the glass tube in the middle of the laboratory, and on the creature floating inside.

"I'm impressed," Gendo said. "You managed to keep it alive for all these years, with only the basic equipment you had in your hideout."

"Meh," Rainuma snorted, blowing smoke through his teeth and nose. "Keeping these things alive is easy. What's difficult is to prevent them from growing."

"When will it be ready?"

"When do you want it?"

"Tomorrow."

Rainuma snickered. He took a small device out of his pocket, a tiny piece of plastic and metal crowned by two buttons, red and blue; and handed it to the commander.

"You do the honors," he said. "I'll leave this place first hour in the morning. Make sure your goons leave as well, or you'll have to find new ones. Whenever you're ready, the blue button will wake him up. The red one will force him to revert back into a larval stage, easy for your cleaning crew to handle."

Gendo looked at the device in his gloved hand. He put it in his pocket and, without addressing Rainuma any further, not even with a nod; he turned around and walked away.

At first, the older doctor didn't react. He kept looking at the thing in the tube, his hands clasped behind his back and smoke floating from his pipe. His attention, however, was in Gendo's footsteps. Rainuma was counting them, knowing exactly how many were needed to reach the door.

He couldn't let him go, not like that, after he had used him twice. And what he had given him in return? The first time, a pitiful protection, his life officially erased and damned to remain hidden in a wet, seaweed-smelling hole. And now, a vague promise of getting rid of SEELE. Rainuma wanted to laugh at such an idea. He knew well the power of the Throne of Souls, and Nerv had no chance against them.

So, the good doctor was going to choose a different reward for his services: the honor of being among the few people in the world who had shocked Gendo Ikari.

"You're not the only one with an 'Ayanami,' you know?"

The footsteps stopped, all of the sudden. Rainuma looked back, resisting the urge to smile. Gendo wasn't moving, and the door slid close at his hesitation. Then he turned around, seemingly as calm as ever.

"What?"

'Ha! Such a peasant's word,' Rainuma thought. He could see the minuscule changes in the body language, and he could hear the faint faltering in the voice. Although the commander had been quick to regain his composure, and his agents would never suspect it; he had seen it all.

Yes. He had just seen the broken, desperate shell of a man who hid under the commander's clothes and influences and power. The same one he had seen so many years before.

"Explain." Gendo demanded, not caring about what the guards could hear. They were all loyal to him.

"Didn't you think it was too much a coincidence?" Rainuma blew smoke. "That I appeared out of nowhere, after your wife's accident, with the exact knowledge you needed to make endless clones of her? And with the flesh of a Seed, no less!"

"You said SEELE disliked your experiments." Was that a tinge of anger in Gendo's voice? "You said they considered your work an abomination."

"That wasn't a lie. They let me make just one because they needed it, and then they shot everything down. They would've likely shot me as well, if I hadn't come to you for help."

The two men broke eye contact, their backs to each other once more. Still, Rainuma kept an eye on his guest through the blurry reflection in the glass tube.

"Just one?" Gendo asked.

"One soul, many empty bodies. Just like your Ayanami."

"I see. Thanks."

And he went away. Rainuma couldn't hold it anymore, and as soon as the door closed, a chuckle escaped his lips. Then another. Then a louder one. He quickly began to laugh.

Thanks, that Ikari fool had said. As if he had told him out of the goodness of his heart.


It was Saturday morning in Tokyo-3. Asuka and Rei, who had been given the day off by Ritsuko and Misato, met with Hikari in the mall. Shinji, for his part, remained in the cabin, having another training session with Sosuke. However, a big part of his mind was still focused on the events of the previous day, and on what could happen in the coming ones.

If he hadn't been so distracted, maybe he would've noticed that Sosuke seemed more serious than usual.

So, things were quiet in mankind's last bastion against the Angels. Down in the GeoFront, the staff worked at a more leisured pace, allowing themselves to enjoy a peace which could last very little. Their superiors seemed to think the same, for no complaint had arrived from the top offices.

Speaking of offices, when Gendo entered his, he found Fuyutsuki hunched over the desk, phone in ear. Judging by the expression in his wrinkly face, it wasn't a very pleasant call. Not everyone in the GeoFront was in peace that morning, apparently.

Gendo walked to his chair, trying to not make too much noise with his steps. It was less out of respect for his former professor, and more because he wanted to eavesdrop on the conversation. However, Fuyutsuki soon finished whatever he had to say, bid farewell to the person on the other end of the line, and hung up. Making sure to not show his disappointment, Gendo sat down and adopted his favorite pose.

"I've been dealing with calls all morning," Fuyutsuki said, weariness evident in his voice.

"From who?"

"The military, left-wing politicians, right-wing politicians, the City Council… and these aren't the usual complains we get after an Angel battle. Some are accusing us of being a shame for Japan. Others, that we are making the country look weak in the eyes of the world. Passive-aggressive threats, some subtle, some blunt." He sighed. "The Prime Minister used to filter these for us, back when he still was in your debt."

"No matter. Sticks and stones."

"There was also a protest at the Matsuhiro base, and you've heard what happened to the Second and your son in school. The situation is getting dangerous, Ikari."

"There's no need to worry." Gendo didn't even look at him. "We shall recover the government's trust, and the people's, once we catch the First Demon."

Fuyutuki sat on his own chair and pulled a small book from his pocket.

"You speak as if we can do it," he said. "He hasn't appeared in a week. We don't even know where it is."

No reply came from the commander, reassuring or otherwise. A familiar silence fell over the office. The seconds passed, with no activity other than Fuyutsuki turning the pages.

Then, Gendo stood up. His movements were slow and calm, almost relaxed, if the Commander of Nerv could even comprehend such a concept. He walked to the windows, and his steps echoed in the room. He looked at the GeoFront, his kingdom below the earth. He looked at the fields, and the trees, and the faraway mountains, and the artificial blue sky…

His hand slipped into his pocket, innocently, until it found the device given to him by Dr. Rainuma.

He pressed the blue button.

In the old laboratory, many meters above their heads and many more away; the beeps of the machines changed. Those pumping sedatives in the tube stopped. The computers released controlled electrical chocks, to awaken the thing inside and make it grow.

And grow it did.

In a second, its mass increased so much that it shattered the tube. The machines which had been taking care of it were crushed by the expanding flesh.

An AT-Field blasted away the grass, the earth, the trees and the hill itself; and the alarms of Tokyo-3 howled.


"I'm here!" Misato said, running into the Command Centre.

"We have visual!" Makoto announced. "Main screen!"

It was the most humanoid-looking Angel they had seen so far, more than the Third or the Thirteenth. It even had five fingers in each hand. No toes, however.

It stood as tall as an Evangelion. The sides of the body and the head were of a bright orange. The latter seemed more like a cap than skin, especially because of the white, mask-like face, which had no features other than three green eyes. The rest of its body was white, adorned with unbroken black stripes which ran along the limbs and formed a small Y on the chest.

And, in the middle of this Y, the red core. Misato noticed that it was much smaller than usual.

"Uh," Shigeru said. "I don't know why, but it reminds me of the tokusatsu shows I used to watch as a kid." He then changed his tone as he addressed Misato: "The evacuation has started, ma'am. All the areas in the Angel's most likely path will be empty of civilians in fifteen minutes."

"Good. And the pilots?"

"On their way," Maya said. "Section-2 has just picked Asuka and Rei."

"Send someone to retrieve Shinji, too."

"No."

Gendo's voice paralyzed all activity in the Command Centre, just for an instant. Misato, Ritsuko and the technicians turned around and looked up. The eyes of their commander were, as usual, hidden by its reflective glasses

"As it is now, deploying Unit-01 is very risky," he said. "Until the system is perfected, it and the Third Children will remain off the active roster."

Misato admitted that it made sense. She had seen the delay and the clumsiness of Unit-01's movements. Shinji would not be able to fight like that.

"Still, sir," she said, "I think the pilot will be safer here."

"There is no need. Agent Oshiba is with him now, and he has been instructed to take the Third to a shelter in case of emergency."

His tone of voice made it very clear that there would be no further discussion. Misato didn't even try. She returned her attention to the main screen, which showed their new enemy advancing already.

"The Fourteenth Angel," Gendo said. "The codename shall be Gabuthelon."

"ETA?" Misato asked the technicians.

"Seven minutes, ma'am," Makoto replied.

"Damn it… where are the other pilots?"


"We just passed one of the GeoFront's accesses," Rei pointed out.

"Sorry, but I have instructions," the agent said, not taking his eyes off the road, nor his hands off the wheel. "The Angel is too close to the city, and many access points could be damaged or even destroyed. It's very dangerous to use them right now. I'll take you to a safe one, farther away."

Rei nodded and waited. Asuka, on the other hand, crossed her arms as she grumbled something in her mother tongue.

Through the window, she could see the citizens leaving their houses, aided by the police. And yet, despite the urgency of the situation, there was no chaos. People didn't trample each other, nor did they push. They followed the indications and knew where to go, and although she could see fear in their eyes, they didn't allow it to cloud their judgment. Asuka had to hand it to the Japanese: they knew how to deal with emergencies.

"Wait," she blinked, taken out of her thoughts, when she noticed that there were more cars in the road. So many, in fact, that they were going slower. "Hold on… did you just drive into an evacuation route?"

"It's the quickest way to the designated access point, I'm afraid."

Then, much to her consternation, their car stopped completely. A long line of vehicles was in front of them, slowly being redirected by police agents.

"You've got to be kidding me!" Asuka screeched.

"Worry not," the agent said. "It'll only be a moment."

"We're in the middle of an Angel Attack!" she was about to start pulling her own hair. "Mein Gott; show them your badge or something! Let them know we're Nerv, and demand they let us pass!"

"Sorry, but I'm not allowed to disrupt the evacuation."

Groaning as only she knew how to do, Asuka threw her head back.

"I can't believe it!" she protested. "If I didn't know better, I'd think you're doing it on purpose, so that we'll be late!"

The agent kept it to himself, but he found those words funny, because that was exactly what he was doing.

By Gendo's orders.


"We have to slow it down!" Misato said. "Activate the 22nd Defensive Line! Fire at will!"

In the screen, the slopes of a small mountain opened, revealing row after row of cannons. A barrage of missiles was launched at the Angel, but although it was swallowed by a small maelstrom of explosions, it received no damage.

Gabuthelon turned its head towards the Defensive Line, which was preparing a second attack. The Angel crouched, and using both hands, it grabbed a small, abandoned building. It ripped the whole structure off the ground, and then hurled it with a titanic might. The building lost some pieces as it flew through the air, but most of it crashed against the cannons, causing an explosion.

In the Command Centre, amidst the gasps and the curses, Ritsuko Akagi stood silent. She stared at the screen with widened eyes, her mouth hung open.

"That thing just used a tool."

"What?" Misato asked. "No, it just threw something. The Fourth did it, too."

"That was different." Still staring at the feed, Ritsuko barely blinked. "The Fourth Angel threw Unit-01, its enemy. Like a lion pushing a hyena, or a bear pushing a salmon out of the river. This one, however, used an element of the environment to hit a target at a distance. A primitive weapon. A display of primitive intelligence."

The Fourteenth Angel was now tearing the mountain apart, as well as the base inside. It took the broken cannons, one by one, and tossed them aside once it confirmed they were no longer a threat.

Misato bit her lip. Indeed, it didn't behave like its brothers.

"What does this mean, Rits?"

"I'm not sure, but I don't like it."


Sosuke and Shinji walked down the mountain, on route to the closest shelter. They had been quick to abandon the cabin after the first wails of the alarms.

Out of the trees now, they got a good view of Tokyo-3 and the approaching giant. The city's defenses fired, attracting its attention and rage; but all it would do was buy some minutes. It was better than nothing, though. It would give time to complete the evacuation. The tallest buildings were already retracting into the ground.

But there was something missing.

"Where are the Evas?" Shinji asked.

"Don't worry about that," Sosuke said, grabbing his arm. "There's nothing we can do, other than going to the shelter."

The agent tugged, but Shinji didn't move. He didn't take his eyes away from the Angel. In his mind, a decision was made. He knew what to do, even if he had hoped things would be different from now on.

He'd have to be the King of Demons that day, too.

"That's not true." He said, and freed himself from Oshiba's grasp. "That's not true at all!" He looked at Sosuke. "There's something I can do!"

"You can't pilot your Eva properly. And even if you could, going down to the GeoFront is dangerous. The enemy is too close."

Shinji shook his head. His fists were clenched, and affected by a slight shiver. Sweat was forming in his forehead, cold. Fear was dripping from every cell of his body, and yet, he didn't stutter. Not a single syllable.

"I don't need my Unit. I can take care of the Angel by myself, because I'm the First Demon."

He saw Sosuke's face growing pale, and his only eye opening wide. A dead silence, heavy and suffocating, surrounded them. The only sounds were the hissing of the wind and the faraway noises of the Fourteenth Angel.

"It's true," Shinji dared to speak. "I know it's hard to believe, but–"

His words were cut, as was the air in front of him, when Sosuke's katana unsheathed at an inhuman speed.

Shinji flinched, but didn't step back, didn't back down. He gulped down all his fears and ignored the blade next to his neck. It was something he knew could happen. He looked at the swordsman's only eye, which now glared at him, almost burning with anger, on a hateful face scarred by an indignant scorn.

"I understand," Shinji said, "but I'm not going to hurt anyone, I promise. I'll just stall the Angel until Asuka and Rei arrive."

Sosuke breathed through his teeth. Not an inch of his body moved or trembled.

"I'm sorry for keeping it a secret," Shinji insisted. "Once this is over, I'll tell you everything."

The sword remained close to his neck, little more than a millimeter apart; but he didn't care. It couldn't hurt him unless he allowed it. He was still worried though, for he knew he didn't have much time. The Angel would enter the city sooner or later. There could still be people there.

Shinji opened his mouth, ready to tell Sosuke that he needed to go; when the swordsman cut his words once more. Not with the katana, but with a single sentence:

"I can't believe that your father was right."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

AUTHOR'S NOTES:

The new Angel comes from Detective Evangelion, a PS2 game. I couldn't find the Angel's name, if he even has one, so in this universe he's named after Gabuthelon, who is a non-canonical angel in Christianity if I'm not mistaken.

I'd like to thank SheriffJohnStone not only for being my beta reader once again, but also for his help in making this chapter possible. The line "Despite having the powers of the King of Demons, Shinji was still a fourteen-year old boy." is his, and it's great. Also, thanks to Chucky117 for letting me use the dummy plug as a solution to Shinji's synch troubles, despite being similar to a thing he does in his fic Rebuild Shinji's Choice. Go read that one, everyone. I'm also thankful to HydrationStation, deathbringer374, NoseGum, TheOneAndOnlyErik and Greg242 for their help when I was stuck describing some scenes.

Last but not least, many thanks to Surayo, LDGV, Guillaume Grigna, calborghete, righteous-maximus, Lovemichi, Romulo Nidoking BR, ghemstro (GHEMSTROOOOOOOOO! :D), Thekidofheryes, RealRemainder and everyone who follows and/or favorites. Thank you for your constant support.

Before I go, I'd like to make a brief mention to the EverLAStingLove initiative, which aims to bring together all the fans of Evangelion, and especially Asushin, so that their fanfics and fanart can be translated to reach as many people as possible. Quoting a bit from the reddit post:

Shinji and Asuka's relationship has several layers of tropes and narrative construction that makes it really interesting, notably being one of the most prominent tools in the story that is used to represent the challenges of humans to form connections and relationships even if they love each other, in the eternal struggle of the hedgehog's dilemma.

No matter if their journey ends with them getting too close and hurting each other (The End of Evangelion), having to be apart because of circumstances and losing each other's warmth (Shin Evangelion), earning the chance of a fresh start (Sadamoto's Manga) or even being able to solve their dilemmas and have the chance to be happy together (Angelic Days and ANIMA), the key point about their stories is that they symbolize hope.

The hope that, despite the struggles and hardships, people will be able understand each other and somehow be able to find love and happiness.

That's why our love and passion for Evangelion and for those characters and what they represent is an EverLASting Love, a flame that will keep burning and shinning.

You can find more information by following the hashtag EverLAStingLove in twitter (and in reddit, I think)

Take care, everyone! See you in the next chapter! :D