Chapter Five – Somewhere in My Memory
… or Snape hears what I remember of that night

Closing the doors to the compartment, Snape brought out his wand and swished it at them. After seeing me watching him curiously, he explained, "I charmed the doors so that muggles won't come inside."

I made sure to make my expression look confused at that word. He understood.

"Muggle is the Wizarding World's word for a person who has no magic," he said as he sat down.

"Muggle," I said as if trying to sound the new word on my tongue. Then I looked at him thoughtfully.

"Sounds like an insult," I said bluntly. "Like I was about to mug someone. Wouldn't it be better to call them non-magicals?"

Then I had to ask myself if I said too much as I could see a cloud come over his face. This was one of my bad habits, talking before thinking it through. Or being tactless. A small Gryffindor trait.

"Perhaps," was all he said on the matter. Instead, he gave me a sharp look and pulled out my letter to Hogwarts.

"You said you had some questions about our world," he said in lieu of continuing with the theme I had breached.

"Yes I did," I replied with a nod. "You can imagine my surprise when I finally got to read the letter. I never even heard of Hogwarts before and the letter was unfortunately either meant for children raised as magicals or the sender expected us that weren't born in the magical world to know about it."

There was a pause in which Snape seemed to think about what I said. Apparently, the letters weren't the same for muggle-borns if I read his expression correctly. I think that either he or Lily got a completely different letter.

"I was also very lucky that an owl was waiting for me when I got out of the library, otherwise, I wouldn't have been able to send a reply," I added. "And then where would we be?"

It was probable that Dumbledore would have sent Hagrid to pick me up from the hut on the sea. Was I ever so glad to be able to skip that night. It also meant that it wasn't my birthday yet – that particular day would come in a few days, though.

"Professor McGonagall sends her apologies about that," Snape finally said, "she – as did we all, I suppose – expected that your relatives would have told you about our world."

"Well, you thought wrong," I said before cringing at my tactlessness again.

"I apologize," I said quickly before he could frown at me, "that was unkind of me. It wasn't your fault."

Instead of replying, Snape went over the letter again.

"Let's me start explaining from the top then," he said.

"Owl post is the main mode of sending messages and letters to people in the Wizarding World. There are other modes as well, but this one is the easiest and usually fastest. Owls that are trained for delivering mail are usually faster than normal owls and far more intelligent."

I could agree with that – Hedwig was amazing! I couldn't wait to see if I could get her as well. I didn't want someone else getting that amazing owl.

"What are the other modes?" I asked curiously. It was good to know in case I didn't have access to an owl – or if certain house-elf whose name started with a D decided to withhold my mail next year.

"There's Floo Powder for larger parcels than the owls can carry," Snape started explained. Before I even opened my mouth to ask him what Floo Powder was, he was already continuing.

"Floo Powder is a powder that allows you to travel between fireplaces and is one of the transport modes of our world. It can also be used for sending large items over. The other mode is a bit more difficult as it is either impossible to learn or it takes a long time for someone to learn. It's called a Patronus Message."

I was surprised at the last one. I thought that the Patronus messaging was an Order of the Phoenix secret. However, there was something missing.

"That's all fine and dandy," I said after thinking about if for a bit, "but what about people who live in the non-magical world like me and probably don't have access to a fireplace or Floo Powder. Or don't have owls? Or can't do the Patronus Message? What if there's an emergency situation and they can't get help?"

I could see I put him in a tough position again. Grr... wizards really don't think of making muggle-born people feel more comfortable in the Wizarding World, do they? I might have to change that.

"That's really not nice," I said when it became apparent that Snape had no answer to that.

"How are Hogwarts letters to muggle raised children sent then?" I asked.

"Usually, a professor is sent to meet with them and their parents to explain about our world and to answer their questions," Snape replied.

"Like you did with me," I nodded.

"Yes."

To change the subject, Snape went over the letter again.

"You can buy all your school supplies in Diagon Alley, which is where we are going right now. Before that, though, we are going to go to Gringotts Wizarding Bank to withdraw some money from your vault."

"So I do have money?" I asked him before he could continue, and made sure to show relief on my face. Well, it wasn't exactly an act – I was happy to know that I wasn't left penniless in this universe.

"Yes, your parents didn't leave you without money. Your father was from an old family and old families in our world are usually quite wealthy."

"Really? Is there any way to check exactly how much money I have so that I know how to make it last until I finish my schooling and get a job?"

Unlike Harry, I wasn't going to be an Auror. I still wasn't sure what I wanted to be, seeing as I didn't know much about magical careers, but I was always attracted to the Curse Breaker career. We'll see.

"You can ask to talk to the manager of your vaults, yes," was all Snape said.

"Vaults?" I immediately jumped on the word. In the books, Harry only had the one vault. Or was this like in the fanfictions, I have read where that vault was only a trust vault and Harry would have to wait until he was seventeen to be able to enter the main vault?

"Yes, usually families such as yours create a trust vault when a child is born and annually fill it with the amount the child used during the year."

"Wow, that's neat," I had to say. "But will we have the time to talk to the manager? I'm sure that by now you've already realized that I'm full of questions, and I'm sure the visit would go on too long if you let me talk to them."

I would swear on whatever deity sent me here that I could see a small, amused smile lit Snape's face, but it was gone in a second and I couldn't be sure of it.

"Indeed, I have realized it by now, yes," he replied and I had to grin a bit sheepishly.

"However, it is to be expected that you have questions. It is also because of this that I was sent to meet with you today," he replied.

So I was right and they were probably going to send Hagrid until it became apparent that I had too many questions and that someone else would have to go and answer them. Not because Hagrid didn't know the answers, but yeah – it was probably because he didn't know the answers to quite a few of them, like my family's vaults.

I mean no insult to Hagrid with this, I've always liked the half-giant a lot.

"To answer your question, no I do not believe we will have time to talk to the manager at length, however, we can always return to Gringotts at another time," he said.

I smiled at him gratefully. "Thank you very much, sir," I said, only then realizing I haven't been calling him Sir at all. Very polite, Adaline, very polite, I scolded myself mentally.

"At that time you can ask your manager to tell you more about the Potter family since I imagine he's the only one with the most knowledge of your family," Snape continued as he crossed his legs and rested his chin on his intertwined fingers. It made him look all noble and made me sit up straighter with both my legs neatly put to the side and my hands resting on my lap like I've seen in the Princess Diaries so long ago on how a lady was supposed to sit.

This arrangement of mine resulted in a raised eyebrow, but no other acknowledgment.

"This brings me to the topic of your parents' deaths," Snape continued and for the first time since I've met him, there was an obvious pain in his eyes.

"You've written that your relatives told you that your parents died in a car accident. That is a lie," he said, with a bit of sharpness to his words at the end.

"I imagined that they did, yes," I replied with a small grimace. It was time to bring a bit of light on the fact that she remembered the night her parents died. "Because my memories tell me a whole different story," I continued with a quick look at Snape's face to see how he would react.

And he did. React, I mean. His eyes widened a bit, but then his – by now – famous mask of indifference came up.

"You remember the night your parents died?" He asked in surprise.

I nodded quietly and wondered if I should tell him that I could mostly remember everything due to my excellent memory. My memory wasn't exactly photographic or eidetic or whatever else they called the total recall – but it was very good, especially in remembering past events and trivia (usually useless) that I've read over the years. I could remember things I've dreamt about when I was a baby in my past life, but would probably forget what I said five minutes ago sometimes, so my memory was a bit iffy like that.

Nonetheless, I was very proud of my memory, so let's leave it at that.

"I remember most of my childhood before I was left with the Dursleys," I admitted. I said childhood before the Dursleys because let's face it – neither Harry nor I had childhoods with the Dursleys.

This little fact didn't seem to escape Snape's notice, but he let it go for now. I imagined that if he would take me to Hogwarts this evening, he would take me straight to Madam Pomfrey for a full medical examination.

"Mum was just putting me to sleep when the doors downstairs exploded inwards and my dad yelled at my mum to take me and get away because he was there. There was a cold laugh and my dad's yells suddenly stopped," I said, looking through the windows as I tried to disassociate myself from the memory. It was still painful thinking of James and Lily, even if they weren't my parents for long.

"Mum then started crying and put me down into my crib, before kissing me and turning her back to me as the doors to my room blew apart and he entered. My mum started pleading with him to let me live and kill her instead, but he kept telling her to step aside. She didn't though and he finally shouted something at her. There was a lot of green light and my mum dropped to the floor as if her strings were cut..."

I shut up there and brought my hands to hide my crying face. I didn't want Snape to see me like that.

There was silence in our compartment, only broken by my soft cries.

After a few moments, I took a deep breath and tried to calm down to continue telling him the memory of that night.

"Then he turned to me and said the same words and the same green light came at me. I remember my head was splitting open in pain and I could hear someone yell in pain as well, but I can't tell if it was me or if it was him. All I know is that when the pain stopped, I was alone in the room for a while."

I wondered if I should tell him that I remembered him coming into the house and crying over my mother and then bringing me outside of the burning house. Should I? I wasn't sure if I should, but then again – I wanted him to know that I remembered him.

In the end, I softly said, "Thank you for bringing me out of the house. If you hadn't, I would probably have died that night as well."

This was another divergence from the canon story in the books and the movies. Snape in the movies came and cried over Lily's body but left Harry crying in the crib. He wasn't mentioned in the books at all until Harry arrived at Hogwarts and it was Hagrid who took Harry from the house on that night.

This brought on the subject of Sirius.

"I don't understand one thing, though," I said, taking a chance to look at Snape. I immediately looked away from the painful expression on his face at my recounting of Lily's death.

"What thing?" He asked me, also looking away from my face.

"Why didn't Papa Padfoot take me in?" I asked him.

And yes, that is exactly what I called Sirius when I was a baby. James would always get angry when I said Papa, but would melt when I gave him a smile and called him daddy, so he obviously wasn't too mad about it. As long as he, James, was daddy, Sirius could be called whatever I desired.

If he had lived, I would have probably been a huge daddy's girl.

I could see Snape didn't understand who I was talking about, so I elaborated. "My godfather, Sirius Black? Or Uncle Moony for that matter?"

I think he knew who I meant by that moniker since he didn't ask me who I meant by it. His black eyes were frowning at me – but not from hearing the name of the person who was bullying him when he was younger, and who he thought betrayed Lily to Voldemort, but thoughtfully as if he only now realized the importance of my memory. I could see indecision in his eyes. Should he tell me that my godfather was incarcerated in Azkaban or not?

In the end, he decided to be truthful with me and told me, "Black couldn't take you because he was arrested on suspicion of betraying you and your parents to the man who killed them, and for the murder of twelve muggles the next day."

He paused there as if trying to find words.

"There exists a spell. A spell that can make you keep a Secret. The charm is called the Fidelius Charm and the person who has it cast on them is called the Secret Keeper. Black was the Secret Keeper of your location and told it to the Dark Lord. He betrayed you all and that is why he is currently kept in the highest security prison in Azkaban, the wizarding prison."

I was honestly confused by now. I knew that Sirius received no trial, but the fact that he was my godfather by the Olde Rites should mean something, shouldn't it? Or did Harry's Sirius never insist on that ritual? I never knew that Sirius would go to this length when James and Lily asked him to be my godfather, but he did. He asked them to do the Olde Rite to make him so – it would make him incapable of ever betraying me.

"I'm confused," I admitted, chewing slightly on my lower lip.

"About what?" Snape asked me.

"How could people think that Papa Padfoot betrayed us if he is my godfather?"

A moment of silence as Snape looked at me as if he couldn't understand what I was confused about. But then, his eyes widened again and he sat up straight as if realizing something.

"By him being your godfather, you mean?" He asked as if already knowing the answer. "Did your parents name him your godfather by the Olde Rites?"

"If you mean they took me to a huge room that they said was a ritual room, and had some strange people and Papa Padfoot recite something about vowing to protect me, then yes," I replied, wondering all the time if this would make me blow my cover by being ignorant of being a witch. I made sure not to say that they took me to Gringotts or mention the word goblins.

I think I did a good job, because apparently, Snape bought it, as he paled even further than his already pale skin and seemed to almost crumple in his seat.

This made me suspicious. Why would he react like this if he hated Sirius? Was this world different even in this instance? I have seen no hatred whenever James, Sirius or Remus were mentioned, only pain at Lily's name or memory. Did the Snape of this world not hate the Marauders as much as he did in Harry's?

Just how different was this universe than the one I knew about?

I wasn't to get any answers at the moment because the train stopped and we had to exit it.