Entry #121

So far I think I've adjusted quite well to my life in Floridity. There's still no sign
of anybody coming to seek my whereabouts, nor have I heard anything remotely
related to some great "hero of the woods" that went and offed themself. If
anything, most of the gossip around town is about the local mystery dungeon
adventurer's guild. So for the most part, I'm in the clear, which is great, since I'm
starting to get used to living here.

Things are never perfect though, and working for days on end has made me a bit
lonely. Even the most isolated individuals need someone to talk to occasionally.
Leaving Cradle Town and everything I held dear felt like the equivalent of getting
my soul drained. Even though I have my dream job, it did little to fill up the hole in
my heart; I was empty inside. I'm in no right to complain, afterall, I did bring this
upon myself. I'm aware that just about everyone faces these kinds of internal
struggles once they become independent, and I don't mean just loneliness. I'm
actually
one of the lucky ones, as I was spared of having to face the difficulties of
remaining financially stable, so maybe I'm just being spoiled. Perhaps this is all part
of growing up, and I'm just now coming to terms with reality. The closest I've had
to any real company are the annual postcards I send to my parents to let them know
I'm okay, but without them actually being here, it doesn't really count. I wish I
stayed in school longer.

My solitude was probably why I was so overjoyed to meet Mabel for the first time in
forever. I couldn't believe it at first, and neither could she apparently. Who would've
thought that after all the precautions I made to ensure that no one could trace me
back to Floridity, I would be rediscovered not even a year later by some girl that was
just out for the holidays? I almost didn't even bother to go to the festival, and I was
only there for a short window of time. It's like I can only be either extremely lucky,
or extremely unlucky. I don't even know which side of the fortune spectrum my
chance encounter with Mabel falls in. At least it was Mabel, and not someone like
the little Eevee reporter. The mere thought of that middle-schooler shoving a
notepad in my face again for an interview makes me shudder.

On one of the last few days Mabel had before she went back to Cradle Town, she
pulled me aside to watch the sunset together. I was only going along with it to be
nice, as I didn't think anything would come out of it, but I was surprised when she
expressed a genuine desire for us to keep being friends, even after months of being
separated. I was so happy to hear her say that, as it's definitely a nice change of
pace to have someone to talk to, but I've broken her heart twice now. Why would
still want to stay in touch with someone like that? Just because I've hurt her
unintentionally doesn't mean it's justified. I even saw the effects of my actions when
she first appeared at my doorstep as a quivering mess. Seeing her in such remorse
had a terrible pang on my conscious. Just thinking about how I've been repaying her
kindness by making her suffer is going to haunt me for the rest of my days. She's
not one to hold grudges, but I don't think she's ever going to forgive
me for
abandoning her and everyone else I knew in Cradle. I still have trouble forgiving
myself, to be honest. The best thing I can do now to redeem myself is to vow to
never make her sad again, but that's what all friends should already be doing for
eachother.

Mabel has also been writing to me. I get one or two letters from her every week, and
each one describes how her day was, how things are going back in Cradle, and how
much she wants to see me again. The tone of her writing perfectly reflects her
character - chirpy and, at times, sentimental. I would be lying if I said that her letters
don't energize me more than what coffee does, because they do. Though that might
be because she has been my only source of contact with another Pokémon as of late.
Maybe I'm also being too sentimental.