A Grain of Sand Among the Leaves
Enclosed Feelings

The young jonin stared at the small creature sitting in the bassinet on the table. The chair Kakashi sat in was a foot or two away from the kitchen table. The fourteen-year-old leaned forward, watching the auburn-haired child do practically nothing. A sigh escaped Kakashi's mouth, wondering when Gaara would need to be fed next, or even changed. Instead, the infant's seafoam green eyes blinked a couple of times, not noticing the small deposits of sand gathered into the folds of the blankets underneath himself.

In Kakashi's mind, the visit to the Uchiha household ended in disaster even though Mikoto kindly gave what she could for the small infant. In some ways, the young, silver-haired jonin felt the woman simply gave help to Kushina and Minato in an attempt to keep up appearances, something Kakashi found the Uchiha clan to deem important. The fourteen-year-old worried his bottom lip, remembering the reaction of the clan towards Obito due to his companions inability to waken his #sharingan#.

The young shinobi went to the funeral, only to find the Uchiha's far more interested in his newly obtained ability, and whether he would keep their family secrets over the dead youth from their clan. Kakashi felt like the family wanted to bring him into the family, and yet also felt a level of disdain due to not being blood-related; the feeling wasn't one he could easily describe, but he did know he didn't like the feeling. However, Mikoto always treated the young jonin like family much in the same way Kushina and Minato did, accepting him as he was.

That would normally, in the mind of the fourteen-year-old, make Mikoto doing something for Kushina simply out of formality out of the question, but Kakashi clearly felt the anxiety in the room. Gaara's ability to move sand remained strange, an abnormality which set the child apart. The teen's dark eyes clearly saw the two adult females faces, and knew both were unsure of how to proceed. The auburn-haired infant looked so physically weak, and yet all four knew the sands were dangerous in nature.

Mikoto gathered up items quickly then, her dark eyes darting over to the small infant held in Kakashi's arms. The teen watched the woman try to smile at him, while Kushina took Gaara from his arms. The wife of the Uchiha head proceeded to pile into his arms a basket full of items. "Here's some of Sasuke's old clothes, though they won't fit Gaara for awhile, as he's much smaller than my little one was as a newborn. You'll have to have something specially made for him, or perhaps find another person with a premature child."

Kakashi carried the basket with no questions, his mouth pushing tightly as his eyes watched Kushina carefully. The fourteen-year-old noticed no other sign of the sand gathering around the small infant, and yet...

The entire situation felt off, reminding the silver-haired jonin of the times he felt an adrenaline rush during a mission. The teen found himself jolting away from his own thoughts upon hearing Kushina's voice. The voice of the Hokage's wife remained soft in tone, indicating a concern. "Are you alright?"

Kakashi felt his facial features wrinkle up under his mask, dropping the basket onto the table.

"I'm confused."

"About what?"

The silver-haired teen narrowed his dark eyes, his mouth pushing together, slowly gathering his thoughts. His attempt to avoid saying something which would rile up the fiery tempered woman failed. "Mikoto-san was rather rude to you, wasn't she?" The woman's chakra spiked, her hands reaching out to pull on Kakashi's cheeks. "Ow..."

"Don't ow me. Where did this idea come from? That Mikoto was rude to us?"

"She was in a hurry to get us out of there, and while she gave you some stuff for Gaara, none of it fits him. Aren't all newborn babies the same size?"

One of Kushina's eyebrows shot up. "You know, for being a child genius, you are one of the worst idiots I've met. Babies are not the same size, particularly when they're born prematurely. I've got to have someone make him clothing or find someone who had a preemie."

"Preemie?"

"A baby born prematurely." Kushina shook her head, before setting about reorganizing the hand-me-downs she'd gotten from Mikoto."

"The stuff's also used."

"It's the thing one does with babies, give away the old clothing so it can still be used, though you're supposed to keep aside the special outfits."

Kakashi's mouth wrinkled up. "Good grief. Are you telling me women are as nuts about baby clothing as they are their own?"

Soon the teen was hurrying out the window as Kushina threw things at him, her voice strained from yelling at him for saying something stupid. Kakashi let out a sigh, wondering what he'd done wrong, before heading back to the house he'd inherited from his father. Closing the door behind him left him staring at the empty home, reminding him of how alone he was when Minato and Kushina weren't around him. The feeling ate away, which was why Kakashi wanted to make sure they were happy in their lives. They made him happy.

A thought though crossed the young jonin's mind, making him step into his father's room. Kakashi's feet left footsteps on the ground, having not entered the room very often since his father's death. The teen opened up the closet and looked at the boxes. Kakashi's thin fingers pulled out the boxes, opening them up until he found the items from his infancy. The teen reached in, touching the toys, moving them aside until he found the clothing at the bottom, smaller than what Mikoto provided. A sigh escaped his mouth as he gathered them up in his arms, heading back to Hokage's place, slipping into the kitchen through the window again.

Kushina looked at him, a glare on her face as she rocked Gaara back and forth. "You're really a glutton for punishment, aren't you Kakashi?"

Instead of answering, the teen moved over to the table, dropping the clothes onto the wooden top. "I brought you something Kushina-san."

The red-haired female stared at him, making the fourteen-year-old shuffle from one foot to another once, the discomfort getting the better of him. He reached out and picked up an outfit. "I thought you said used clothes were okay when they were gifts?"

"Kakashi..." The woman carried Gaara over to the table, setting the baby into the bassinet Mikoto gave her. Kushina reached out, picking up one of the outfits, her mouth twisting up. "Where did you get these?"

"They were mine." The teen's dark eyes narrowed at her, wondering why the Hokage's wife was so upset. The silver-haired youth watched her facial features twist up, then felt a sharp sting across his cheek. Kakashi's eyes widen, a very painful feeling settling into his chest, the urge to cry in a very unmanly manner threatening briefly to surge forth, only to be replaced by anger. The young jonin turned to her, his fists clenching. "What the hell was that for!"

"Do you even understand what these clothes meant to someone in your family!"

Kakashi felt his eye twitch, his mouth twisting up as his own anger continued to flare. "As if that's any of your business! So what if my old man kept them! What of it!"

Kushina's eyes narrowed, her arms crossing her chest. "I know you used to have problems with your father, but I honestly thought you'd gotten over that! How can you be so cold! If he kept them, they meant something to him, yet you're just giving them away like this!"

The fourteen-year-old couldn't place the feelings which now upset his stomach, but he did know what was going on through his mind. A hot heat spread across his cheeks, his exasperation hitting a new high. The teen knew full well how important the clothes were, but this made the gift even more important. "You don't get it!"

The young jonin left through the kitchen window before the red-head lost her temper again, heading off to a nearby alleyway, kicking one of the trashcans good and hard. "Stupid, stupid, stupid!"

"What..." The deep voice from nearby made the young jonin let out a sigh, figuring a lecture would be coming. "Kakashi, what are you doing?"

"Nothing." The silver-haired youth glared at the trashcan, the small dents now evident.

"I obviously saw you kicking a trashcan. That's not doing anything." The other person sighed, stepping over, a hand clapping down on Kakashi's shoulder. This forced the other teen to look up into Asuma's face.

"I'm confused. If you knew what I was doing, then why did you ask what I was doing?" The silver-haired teen narrowed his eyes at the fifteen-year-old.

Asuma glared back, his mouth shutting firmly. "I think you know the question was intended as a way of asking you why you were doing what you were doing, rather than what you were doing." The older teen lowered his hand, raising an eyebrow, his mouth twisting up in worry. "This doesn't have to do with what happened to Rin does it?"

Kakashi's instinct amounted to moving away, moving swiftly to the top of one of the nearby trashcans, continuing to glare at the fifteen-year-old. "None of your business."

Asuma sighed, one hand reaching up to rub the back of his head. "Look. If you ever..."

"Don't need to talk."

An irritated sound escaped the lips of the third Hokage's son, and his hand reached down to his pocket, pulling out the packet of cigarettes. "Seriously, do you have to act like a feral cat all of the time?"

"I don't get what you're talking about, plus..." Kakashi pointed at the box, one hand on the top of the trashcan to keep him balanced. "Does your old man know you're smoking?"

"Shut up." Asuma pulled out his lighter, flicking the lever to light up. "Seriously, though, if you don't need to talk, explain the cans."

"You told me to shut up."

"Kakashi..." The fifteen-year-old turned, placing his back to the wall. A puff of smoke escaped his lips followed soon after by a laugh. "Alright. Still, you're not the only one hurting over Rin's death. Plus, don't you consider me enough of a friend to talk to me about what happened? Or do you want to talk to Guy about it?

The silver-haired teen moved from a crouched position to a sitting position. "Is this a question about whether I prefer you as a friend or Guy as a friend, or whether I would find Guy to be the right person to confide in? I'm not the type of person to confide things in people. You should know that."

The fifteen-year-old reached up to rub the back of his head. "Seriously, never mind. I'm guessing the real reason you don't talk to people is because you don't know how to. Talking does make people feel better you know."

The dark eyes of the silver-haired jonin blinked a couple of times, his hand reaching up to scratch his head, a thought having occurred. "You're right. I do feel better."

Asuma's eyes blinked, his mouth opening in a manner which made him nearly drop his cigarette. "What?" Kakashi moved to walk past the older teen, only to find the left shoulder of his clothing grabbed by the son of the third Hokage. "Exactly what got you upset?"

Kakashi's eyes blinked again. "They baby?"

"You don't like the baby?"

"No. Gaara's cute." The silver-haired teen paid no heed to the twitch on Asuma's face. "I'm mad at Kushina-san."

"Did you just say the word cute?"

The dark eyes of the fourteen-year-old narrowed. "If you ever tell anyone, I'll seriously kill you."

"You do realize that is..." The older teen lets go of his clothes, another sigh escaping Asuma's mouth. "Never mind. Explaining these things to you is a pain. Good luck not getting on the Hokage's wife's bad side. You might want to stay away for a bit if you made her angry."

The young teen, however, did not stay away, and headed back, slipping in through a different window this time. Gaara was now clothed in some of the clothing the silver-haired jonin brought over. Gaara's seafoam green eyes blinked a couple of times, his small hands barely moving, the auburn-haired infant's mouth moving to yawn. Kakashi offered his finger. "What got Kushina-san to change her mind?"

Minato's head appeared from one of the doorways, a smile on his face. "I explained to her, that you wanted some precious memories to go with something your father found precious. Do you want to hold him?"

Kakashi's eyes widened. "I..." The fourteen-year-old swallowed. "I only ever picked him up once, and I'm not sure I did it right. We were kind of in a hurry." The teen paused, remembering what happened, turning his head to look at his sensei. "Did she tell you about want happened?"

"Yes. I've added it to the things I've got to talk to the head of the police force about." The blond haired man walked over, ruffling Kakashi's silver-haired locks. "Plus, it's kind of hard not to notice the light dusting of sand around him. To pick him up, you need to support his head, move slowly and gently. Think you can do that?"

The fourteen-year-old let out a strangled sound. "I don't know. That is so different than, you know, a shinobi weapon."

"I think you can do it."

Kakashi took a deep breath, carefully, gently, but very awkwardly picking up the small infant, his dark eyes widening. His mouth formed a circle. He noticed again Gaara's small size, but how soft the baby's skin was. The teen sat down gently in the chair, watching Gaara carefully, a smile spreading across his face. Kushina drifted into the room, her arms folding across her chest. "Kakashi..."

The teen's head darted up, his dark eyes blinking a few times.

"I'd like to take the baby out for some fresh air, so..."

"No!" The silver-haired teen felt his entire body tense up.

The woman's aura began to flare up, the anger flaring in her eyes. "I get that fact you've gotten attached, but I've got things to do, and Gaara's coming with me."

"No!" The silver-haired teen turned his head to look at Minato, his eyes pleading. The look on his sensei's face, however, proved discouraging, as the Hokage's mouth pressed together, indicating the man wished not to deal with the situation.

"No arguments!" Kushina's anger became more evident.

"It's not safe!"

Minato's eyes widened upon hearing these words from Kakashi, then his mouth opened up. The Hokage moved over to his wife, shaking his head and pulling her into another room. Kushina flinched at this action, not understanding what concerned her husband. She glanced over at Kakashi, but her facial features for some reason softened.

In the long run, the young jonin didn't care, so long as Gaara wasn't taken outside where people could find out his secret. The infant was, as Kakashi said, safe from prying eyes inside the house. The teen didn't know the two adults were speaking of his reaction in the other room.