"So… Luke said that Jess is coming back again next weekend? He's staying above the diner? Does this have something to do with the sneaky breakfast to go you guys ate on the porch?" Lorelai shoved a pop tart and a steaming cup of coffee in her daughter's face. The whirlwind wedding had ended with the biggest drop that the tall brunette had heard in years but she didn't want to pry, careful to tread in the territory that she was allowed too.
"I don't think so!" Rory exclaimed, averting her eyes away from the nosy women, "He just likes the change of scenery and being around family."
"And being around you!" She hummed, "Does he know?"
"Know what?" She tore apart the dry pastry in front of her, smashing it into the plate pondering if she really wanted to spend the morning puking up brown sugar cinnamon.
"That you're-," Rory's eyes met her mother's as she continued, "Pregnant! That you're pregnant!"
The younger of the two hushed her mother, "Don't say it so loud!"
"Do you think it's going to make it go away? Because I thought the same thing! If I said it enough it wouldn't be true but look here you are! Fully functioning human!" Lorelai mocked.
"No, I don't think that! I'm just not ready for…." She pointed to the ceiling which led up to the bedroom where Luke had been hiding, "The world to know!"
"For Luke to know? What do you think he's going to say?" Lorelai grabbed the plate away from her daughter and threw the broken breakfast snack into her mouth, "He'll be delighted to be Grandpa Luke! It will give him an excuse to finally turn that backwards baseball cap forward…"
Rory rolled her eyes, "I know that he'll be happy but it's… it's embarrassing!" She sighed, "It's like my whole life is just one big embarrassing monologue of I don't have a job, I'm having a baby but I don't even have a place to live- I don't know!"
"Hey! I was in the same boat as you…."
"There is such a HUGE difference between your situation and my situation." Rory's head fell to the table and she huffed, "For starters, you were sixteen!"
"I hate to be this person but you still didn't answer the question… did you tell Jess?" She was doing that thing that she had tried too hard to avoid but as the mother, she needed to know the gory details.
"Yes, I told him! I felt bad… I don't think he really knew how to react but he also felt guilty or something. I don't know it was nice being able to talk to somebody about it…." Her fingers pulsed against the linoleum table as she pondered life, love, and Jess.
"You can talk to me!" Lorelai steadied her hand by gripping it with the force of life, "You know I'm here for you babe! Till death do us part… HA! Still coming through with the wedding puns."
"Are you sure? Because I don't want you to be uncomfortable! Because it's kind of uncomfortable, right?" Rory leaned forward, lowering her voice.
"It's just strange! I mean you made it this far without getting pregnant- sometimes I wondered if you ever would but I'm excited, really!" Lorelai nodded reassuringly, "And I want you to talk to me about it! About every little step of the way and we'll find you the perfect place to live with the perfect nursery and the perfect little playroom…" She smiled remembering the little elephants that she had dreamed would lace Rory's room someday, "We got this."
Rory finally cracked a smile, "Okay! Because I have a list of questions…" She ran into her bedroom, slamming a desk drawer, and flinging some stuff out of a box. Lorelai worried she'd return to the table with a book the size of the whole house but it was just a plethora of small lists written down on receipts, napkins, and the small notebook she had always carried with her since her road to true journalism began. Rory cleared her throat before starting, "To begin- am I ever going to NOT feel like throwing up?"
Lorelai laughed, "The throwing up is the least horrific part of the nine months!" She thought back to her own pregnancy that had been filled with minimal morning sickness but an excess number of cravings followed by more pounds gained than her torn band t-shirts would allow.
"Do I even want the rest of these answered?" She shoved them into the middle.
"Let's take a trip down to Andrew's today! We can get you the important books! I didn't read any of them but Sookie said they're important so-,"
"You told Sookie?" Rory stood, scooping up her questions, fears, and concerns and shoving them back into a hidden drawer.
"Just over text! And I didn't say it was you I just said if somebody I knew was pregnant what book should I get them and then she said is it Rory? And I said I'm not at liberty to discuss that!" She held her cup of coffee up.
Rory rolled her eyes pouring the remainder of the pot out for her, "Very discreet!"
"Hey, I don't need to know who it is but have you told the father yet?"
"Not yet!" Rory crossed her arms, rocking on the balls of her feet, "But I will! I'm going too! When the timing is right…." She peered towards her bedroom door, panicked, "I'm a little tired so I'm just going to-," She was grateful to have an out to the awkward conversation of who's the daddy.
"Okay sweetie…" Lorelai nodded sensing the tension, "I'm going to head to work but feel free to swing by this afternoon if you're up for it!"
"For the book trip!" Rory reminded her.
"Yes, the book trip!" The brunette watched her mini me shut the door on the conversation.
She thought back to when she was in this same position. Scared, confused, embarrassed even. It wasn't exactly easy to get knocked up in modern times but here they were. Another generation on the way. Lorelai really wanted to know who the father was, assuming the worst but hoping for the best. In that case, she couldn't help but wonder how this was going to turn out.
Being that a wedding (to a different woman) was pending and all….
Rory didn't think about that- about the other women. She never had. When she had slept with Dean or spent weekends in London with Logan she was always just thinking of her own happiness and her own need in the moment. Some would call it selfish or reckless but to her it was body over mind- something a Yale graduate had a hard time admitting still happened.
She didn't want to be that way anymore. That's why she couldn't tell the father and completely ruin whatever it was that tied him to Odette. And she would make damn sure that her child never turned out like Luke's kid, knocking on his door thirteen years later, inserting itself into a life in process. It was just going to be the two of them.
It's how it had to be.
