Disclaimer: I do not own the characters within this story. All rights and much respect go to Crown Media, Hallmark, Brian Bird, Michael Landon, Jr., the actors, creators, and writers of the show "When Calls the Heart."
**STEAM ALERT**
Chapter 26- Silence Isn't Golden
Jack lay in bed awake, his mind wandering.
Elizabeth's finger traced from his lips, over his chin, down his chest to the waistband of his shorts. "Good morning," she whispered as her lips traced the path that her finger had previously forged.
"Good morning," she whispered again, not used to having to work this hard to get his attention in bed.
"Oh, good morning," he replied.
Taking this as a challenge, she scooted up in the bed as her warm breath began to tickle his ear. She was surprised by his initial lack of interest, as his body usually responded quickly to her touch. A kiss to his cheek was all it took to finally gather his attention.
Jack rolled over her in the bed as he straddled her hips. He gazed down upon her; finding himself captivated by her soulful eyes and warm smile. He knew in his heart that he would always do his best to give her the world.
Her clothes were quickly tossed into a pile as his shorts joined them. He rolled over beside her; his eyes never venturing from hers as his fingers traced across her shoulder and down her arm.
Jack's lips brushed across hers, gently, innocently at first. The desire was there, and the passion quickly followed. There was no doubt that he was addicted to her, but this was one addiction that he could and would live with.
He felt her warm body pressed against his as their breaths mingled and the minty fresh taste from their toothpaste remained. They were so close that each one could feel the heart of the other beating against their chest.
He fell hard into her pillow soft lips; as each kiss fueled the fire that was burning between them. The passion was so strong; his muscles strained, quivered as he held her close. His body was alive as he pushed to remove any worrisome or negative thoughts from his head, allowing his mind to shut down.
Elizabeth ran her fingers down Jack's spine as her body rose up to meet his. She looked into his eyes, feeling more love than she ever dreamed possible.
Their bodies were so close that not even a whisper would have found the space to slip through. In that moment, Jack felt a tear slide from his eye. He loved her and knew in his heart that she would always be his. For if he ever lost her, he would surely lose himself in the process. She is now and would forever be the one thing that made him feel whole.
Jack collapsed beside her in the bed, still holding her close and refusing to release her.
The truth was she didn't want him to let go. If it were possible, she would gladly spend the rest of the day in bed with him lying beside her, holding her close. She tried to put the disturbing feelings from her mind, but the fact was Elizabeth had felt slightly lost recently. Jack had seemed distant, distracted, and unwilling to confide in her. The only time she felt close to him was when they made love, and she was beginning to feel that even that was becoming a chore to him.
"Jack, as much as I'd love to lay here with you, we have to get out to the new place. I need window measurements, and you need to check all of the fencing for Bugsy," she stated as he released his hold on her and rolled over in bed.
"Is something wrong?" She asked.
"No, I'll get up in a few minutes," he stated as he closed his eyes.
An hour later they pulled into the driveway of the new house. Elizabeth proceeded inside to take measurements for window coverings, and Jack walked the property to make certain that all of the fencing was secure. He observed more of the property on this visit, and was inspired by how this farm would allow his now small family to grow. He loved what he saw during his walk, but his excitement was still tempered by the worry he felt over this major financial obligation.
Jack walked into the house and found Elizabeth writing down measurements and excitedly telling him about her decorating ideas for each room. He attempted to appear interested, but she had to call out to him several times to bring him back into the one sided conversation.
The following morning, Elizabeth stepped out of the bathroom, grabbed her bag and slipped a note on her pillow before kissing Jack and walking out the door. He was apparently struggling with something and even though Elizabeth had attempted to get him to open up, he had not yet done so.
He had been restless most of the night, so she tried her best not to wake him. After all, it wasn't often that he had an opportunity to sleep in.
Jack woke to his alarm playing the Train song…
Play that song
The one that makes me go all night long
The one that makes me think of you
That's all you gotta do
He stretched as his left arm fell across Elizabeth's pillow and he heard the crinkling of paper. He rose up on one elbow and pulled the note within eye view…
"Good morning. I hope you got some sleep; you seemed fairly restless last night. I'm worried about you, and I wish you'd talk to me.
I'm going to the barn after work to gather my stuff together for the move. I'll be home early enough to fix dinner. How's Lasagna sound?
Jack, I love you. I hope you know that you can tell me anything. You have always been there for me. Please know that this goes both ways. Please talk to me…"
Jack struggled to make his way through the tiny apartment, nervous about the weekend move into their first home together.
He stood and stared at the numerous items she had recently accumulated and laid out on the sofa. She had sheets, curtains, kitchen items, bath mats, towels and other decorating items covering each piece of furniture. If it was meant to be sat in, there were boxes or other items covering it. Stacked in the corner were new muck buckets, water buckets, feed tubs, saddle, bridle and hay racks. New shavings shovels and two pitchforks were left leaning up against the wall.
Jack grabbed a cup of coffee, and stood at the table unable to find a place to sit. He felt his chest tighten as the realization of new obligations upon him were visible everywhere he looked.
Before now he was always satisfied to rent an apartment; no landscaping to be concerned with and maintenance was not his responsibility. Now he was a married man with major responsibilities and he was concerned that he would be unable to live up to the image others, especially Elizabeth, had of him.
Jack was working a split shift, providing coverage for officers who were on leave. Usually scheduled to work from 7am-3pm, this week he was working from 11am to 7pm. At 2pm, he called into the dispatcher, requesting a 10-7 at the local Subway sandwich shop. He walked in the door, prepared to each lunch alone when he caught a glimpse of two firemen that he knew, but didn't see very often.
"Hey Jack," Randy Williams called out, causing his lunch companion to turn around.
"Hey," Jack replied as he walked over to their table. "Are you guys working or have you finished your shift?"
"I wish," Johnny Ames stated. "We just came on at 7am. We had a run a little while ago and just decided to stop here for lunch."
Jack excused himself to order his sub, and then took a seat next to Randy.
"Whoa, I haven't seen you in a while. When did you get married Jack?" Johnny asked.
Jack smiled, "About two months ago. It's the best decision I ever made."
Johnny laughed, "I told you last year that you wouldn't be able to hold out forever; some girl would reel you in. So, what's she like?"
Jack looked down at his ring and smiled, "Her name is Elizabeth. She's an elementary school teacher; she rides horses like no one else you've ever seen. She's kind, loving, compassionate and gorgeous all wrapped up into one package."
"Well, it's good that she knows how to ride, because that was the call we just went out on," Johnny remarked.
"What are you talking about?" Jack asked.
Johnny continued, "We were called out to Princess Ann Farms. There was this girl who apparently fell off her horse over the coop jump, landing underneath it, and the horse fell on her. She was riding alone and no one knows how long she was out there before the owner came out to drag the indoor ring."
Jack attempted to breath, but found the air catching in his throat.
"Are you okay, Jack?" Randy asked.
"How's the girl?" He asked.
Johnny jumped in, "A few broken ribs, separated shoulder, and possible torn cartilage in her knee, but she's alive."
"We don't see each other often. Let's talk about something happier," Randy suggested.
"Hey Randy just bought a new house," Johnny mentioned.
"I said to talk about something happy. I'm not so certain that my new house is a happy topic," Randy quickly commented.
Jack swallowed hard and was rapidly realizing that sitting with Johnny and Randy was doing nothing to ease the concern he had over his own upcoming real estate venture.
"What's wrong with your house?" Jack asked.
"It's turned into a money pit. Whatever could go wrong has gone wrong," he sadly responded. "I guess I rented for so long and if something needed to be fixed, it was the owner's responsibility to do it. Now, I'm the owner," he stated, finally releasing a harsh breath.
"It can't be that bad," Jack remarked.
Randy looked at Johnny and then back to Jack, "Well let's see; first there was the hot water tank. That one was okay; it was a simple fix. Then the bathroom floor began to sag, and we found a leak under the house. Shortly after that the compressor went out on the AC unit. But the worst was the…"
"What's wrong Jack?" Johnny inquired.
"I've heard enough. Please I'm stressed enough about our move," Jack quickly interjected.
"Did you buy a house Jack?" Johnny asked.
"Yes, we're moving this weekend. My apartment was cramped enough with two people, but now with all of the stuff that Elizabeth has accumulated, it is definitely tight quarters," Jack stated with a slight laugh which quickly faded as he thought about Randy's experience.
Jack stared out into the shopping center parking lot, "This is such an investment. I'm just used to renting."
Just then, Randy's scanner buzzed and they rushed to their ambulance to take another call, leaving Jack to finish his lunch and ponder the contents of their conversation.
Elizabeth sat at her desk finishing up lesson plans for the remainder of the week. She pulled out her phone and dialed Jack's number…
"Hello…?"
"Hi Jack. Are you busy?" She asked.
"A little. Did you need something?" He inquired with his own question.
"Are you okay?" Elizabeth responded.
"Why does everyone have to ask me that?" Jack replied.
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bother you. I guess we'll talk later," she stated before hanging up the phone.
She remained at her desk staring at her phone, and found herself extremely confused by his tone. She gathered her belongings and decided that she would accomplish nothing further at school, so she headed for the barn.
Elizabeth ran by Rosie's apartment and picked up Onyx and they made the short drive to the barn. Poor Onyx got an earful on how men can be so insensitive.
Elizabeth parked her Jeep and placed Onyx in the play yard before heading to Bugsy's stall. She passed several boarders on the way, each one mentioning how much they were going to miss her and Bugsy after they moved.
She brought Bugsy out for a short ride, finding herself alone in the ring. She hacked around and popped over a few small fences when she glanced up and saw Jack's police cruiser in the driveway.
She trotted over to the fence as he exited the vehicle, and she quickly observed a stern look on his face.
"Jack, is something wrong?" She was getting tired of asking the same question.
"Why are you out here by yourself?" He asked rather sharply.
"Excuse me?" She snapped back.
"You shouldn't be riding by yourself," the words rushed out of his mouth, and she quickly gathered his angry undertone.
"Well, as usual, there are people all around the barn, so I'm not alone," she advised. "I'm going to ask you again; what's wrong? You have been in a sour mood for days," her tone was soft, but her frustration bled through. "Have I done something to upset you?"
"Nothing's wrong. I just don't think you're showing good judgment riding out here alone," he remarked. He said nothing further, but Elizabeth caught him staring in her direction.
Feeling self conscious, she asked, "Why are you staring at me?"
"Do you need to wear that color of lipstick? He remarked. It makes you look like…"
"It makes me look like what?" She blurted out as her eyes narrowed, her lips were pursed and her brow furrowed.
Before he could respond, Elizabeth snapped back, "Jack, are you just trying to pick a fight with me? I mean, I wish you'd tell me what I did that's so heinous, because this accusatory tone you've been taking with me is getting old," she informed him.
Jack turned away, retreating to his cruiser as he heard the radio buzz requiring his attention. "I have a call that I need to take. I'll talk with you later," he stated as he approached the fence.
"What time will you be home?" She asked, hoping that they could talk later as it was obvious that something was bothering him and it was making her nervous.
"I'm not sure, regular time I guess," he stated as he turned and headed back to his car.
"Please be careful," she called out to him as he closed the cruiser door and backed out of his parking space.
Elizabeth watched as he pulled out onto Independence Blvd. and headed toward the Navy base. She was well aware of the fact that the surrounding area had been the site of much unrest as of late. She raised her head to the sun and closed her eyes, saying a simple prayer for his safety…
"I stand firm on your promises, O' Lord. I believe that you above anyone or anything else are able to keep Jack safe. Please send angels to surround him, and return him home safely to me."
Elizabeth dismounted, rolled her stirrups up and loosened her girth. "Come on Bugsy. I'm not into riding right now, and I'm fairly certain that you aren't either," she stated.
She and Bugsy walked backed toward the barn. Elizabeth glanced over to the pet area and observed Onyx running around chasing Ophelia, the barn cat. She took care of Bugsy, making certain that he was settled for the night. She walked over and removed Onyx from the fenced area and headed for her Jeep.
Elizabeth placed Onyx in the security of her crate for the short ride back to Rosie's apartment. "Your daddy is upset about something. I'm not sure what it is, but I'm determined to find out."
As she closed the passenger side door on the Jeep, Stacey caught her attention, "Hey Elizabeth…?"
"Hey, I already took care of Bugsy, and he has his hay for the night." Elizabeth observed the look of shock on her face, "WOW, everyone seems to be upset today. What's wrong?"
"Stephanie was riding over at Princess Anne and I don't know what happened, but she fell off and her horse fell on her," Stacey stated, adding that her friend Christine worked there and called to tell her.
Elizabeth gasped, "Is she okay?"
"I understand that she will be okay, but she broken up right now. She's at Sentara Bayside Hospital if you want to go see her," Stacey advised before being called away to the barn.
Elizabeth slipped into her Jeep and sat momentarily, "Yeah, like I'm good enough friends with her to visit." Elizabeth glanced over at Onyx and suddenly her heart softened. She smiled at the once silly puppy that was growing into a gorgeous dog, "You're right. I should put our petty differences aside. Maybe I'll visit tomorrow."
Elizabeth dropped Onyx off at Rosie's then sat in her Jeep and wiped a few stray tears that fell down her cheek. "After this weekend, you'll be home where you belong, Onyx," she whispered.
Elizabeth rushed home to start cooking dinner, hoping to have it done when Jack arrived. She timed the Lasagna so that it would come out of the oven in enough time to heat the bread and she would have it on the table when he walked through the door. She poured two glasses of wine moved everything off the table, sat down and began watching the door, hoping to see the handle turn.
After she consumed a full glass of wine, she released a harsh breath, pulled her phone from her purse to call Jack, but realized that he had sent a text…
"Going out with Lee. B home L8r…"
"Are you kidding me…? How could u b so insensitive? I made dinner and I'm sitting here waiting 4 u…" She wrote out planning to text him back. "No, I can't send that," she thought before deleting the comment.
"Would u please talk 2 me…?" she texted instead.
She sat with her phone in her hand, glancing between it and the door, hoping for a response from either item. However, she received no call, or text, and the door handle stubbornly remained still.
She grabbed the plates and threw the uneaten food in the trash. Elizabeth put the cork back on the wine bottle and headed for the kitchen. Before putting it away, she again removed the cork, and poured herself a second glass.
Elizabeth pulled out her phone and called Rosie…
"Hey, what's going on with the guys?" She asked.
"What do you mean?" Rosie replied.
"Well, Jack was snippy with me earlier, and then he sends me a text saying he's going out with Lee," she stopped talking long enough to take another sip of her wine. "I was sitting at the dining room table with dinner ready for him when I saw the text. That's rude, and certainly not like Jack. Do you know what's wrong?"
Rosie stated, "No, Lee didn't say anything to me. We had already eaten and Lee was getting ready to go home when Jack called. I assumed maybe you two had a fight."
"Not that I know of, but we're liable to have one when he gets home," she clarified.
"Are you upset that he went out with Lee?" Rosie asked.
"Of course not, but if he is upset about something and confiding in Lee instead of me, then that bothers me," Elizabeth remarked. "He's not acting like himself. He's snapping at me, barking out orders, picking fights, and whenever we talk, we get interrupted, so I still don't know what's bothering him.
Rosie reassured her, "Elizabeth, Jack loves you more than anything. I'm sure that he'll talk with you soon."
Jack and Lee sat at a table at the Pirate's Cove talking. Initially the topic was nothing specific, just small talk.
"You know I enjoy spending time with you and Elizabeth, but she's not here, which is totally not like you. So, what's wrong?" Lee asked as each of them nursed their respective beers.
"Did you know I saw her riding her horse by herself today?" Jack stated as if anyone hearing the statement would think it bizarre.
Lee looked perplexed, "Does she generally ride double?"
It was now Jack's turn to look confused, "No stupid…I meant that she was the only one in the ring riding. What would have happened if she had fallen off, and no one was there to help her?"
"I guess you have a point there," Lee replied. "So what did she say when you asked her?"
"I didn't. The dispatcher sent me on a call, so we haven't talked," Jack responded.
"Jack, so why are you here with me instead of with your wife at home? What's going on? You're definitely acting weird," Lee remarked.
Jack took a deep breath and glanced around at the tables of men out enjoying time with their friends.
Jack's perusing of the area did not go unnoticed by Lee, "Are you missing your time as a bachelor; maybe regretting having gotten married?"
"What? WHAT? No, I love Elizabeth, and I'm lucky that she agreed to marry me," the words rushed out with the force of a cork from an exploding bottle of champagne.
"Then what's going on?" Lee became determined that he was going to make Jack talk.
"It's everything; this move, buying this farm, being responsible for and to someone else." Jack's eyes looked distant, "I don't want to let her down."
Jack took a deep breath before continuing, "Everyone looks to me like I know all the answers. Maybe I'm supposed to, but I don't. Elizabeth is everything to me, and to let her down would crush me," he admitted.
"Jack, you know that I'm here for you, for both of you actually. But, you need to talk with Elizabeth about this, not me," Lee reminded him. "Go home man; talk to your wife. I think she'll surprise you."
Back at the apartment, Elizabeth periodically checked her phone hoping for a message from Jack. Becoming angry at his lack of concern for her, she grabbed her journal from her bag, found a small spot on the sofa to sit, and attempted to convey her feelings on paper…
"Listen to him…When he enters a room, but chooses to say nothing…listen to him. When you talk on the phone, but he remains unusually quiet or is not his usual self…listen to him. When he picks a fight over something silly…listen to him. When his absence is uncharacteristic…listen to him. When the silence is deafening…listen…always listen. Open your heart and listen, for if you are only listening with your ears, you may not be privy to the truth.
There is much more conveyed through silence than we readily accept. We beg to be included, filled in, fearful of being left out of the feelings and emotions of another which has the potential of altering our universe. We love; we feel loved, but we are just as quickly shunned, and at a loss for why we are left in the dark. Why is it so hard to say what we feel? Are we attempting to spare the feelings of another, or are we simply protecting ourselves? Why does it seem so easy for us to walk away and hurt those that we claim to love the most?
I love you. I love the good, the bad and as if there were such a thing, the ugly. We are best friends, a couple, a partnership, and we must be willing to share everything. Nothing should be off limits; nothing should be a taboo subject. If it bothers you, I need to know, for I would never want to put you in a difficult situation. If the shoe were on the other foot, would you not be pushing me for information, clarification and attempting to understand?
What is excruciating is that the same person who made you feel so special enveloped in such love and warmth yesterday, is capable of making you feel so unwanted today. Please don't push me away, for if you do so long enough, the only thing you accomplish is to show me how easy it is to live without you."
She sat her journal down, unintentionally leaving it open on the table. She reached for her phone and called Jack. It was now 9:30pm but the call went to his voicemail. She grabbed her purse and the keys to her Jeep and headed for the door.
Jack and Lee finished a subdued game of pool and returned to their table and each of their untouched mugs of beer. Jack glanced at his phone which rested on the table, "Elizabeth called."
"Jack, go home. Talk to her; there is nothing wrong with being overwhelmed by everything. Maybe she feels the same way, but you won't know if you don't talk to her," Lee commented.
Lee could see that Jack was thinking, "You know I'm right. What would you tell her if she felt overwhelmed?"
Jack smiled the first smile of the evening, "I'd tell her that I love her and that anywhere we are together is home. I would tell her that we can accomplish so much more together than we ever could apart." Jack stared into his full mug of beer, "I would tell her that she is my life, my world, my everything."
"Then why are you still here with me?" Lee asked as he watched Jack grab his phone and keys from the table and head out the door.
Elizabeth parked her Jeep at Cold Stone Creamery, walked inside and ordered her comfort food, a banana nut and caramel ice cream cup with whipped cream and a cherry.
"Elizabeth," Jack called out as he entered the apartment, falling over boxes that were stacked by the door. He walked into the kitchen where the wonderful aroma of uneaten Lasagna dinner remained.
He walked down the hall assuming that she would now be in bed, but the room was empty. Until then, he had hoped that his total lack of judgment had hopefully gone unnoticed by Elizabeth. At this point he knew that she was angry, and justifiably so.
He sat on the sofa trying to figure where she would be. He glanced down and observed her journal, open and revealing her feelings. He reached over and closed her book, only reading the last line of her entry…
"Please don't push me away, for if you do so long enough, the only thing you accomplish is to show me how easy it is to live without you."
That was all he needed to see; he didn't intend to see that, but as a result, he grabbed his keys and headed for the door.
She walked out into the night air and headed for her Jeep. She slipped inside and made the short drive to the barn. Elizabeth knew that she must look as depressed as she felt when she opened Bugsy's stall door and slipped inside, taking a seat in the corner by the door.
She stirred the ice cream in her cup, finding herself playing with it instead of consuming it.
Jack started his truck and pulled out onto the highway. Ten minutes later he pulled into a parking space, shut the motor down and stepped outside. He passed her Jeep in the small parking area by the barn.
Jack's chest tightened as he felt the cool crisp air enter his lungs. He knew that he owed her an apology, but he also owed her the truth. Seeing a light on in the barn, he slowly continued toward Bugsy's stall.
"Bugsy," she started slowly, "Why do guys have to be so pigheaded?" She continued to sit in the corner, wishing for but not expecting a response.
"I love him, but I must have done something that has upset him so badly, but he won't talk to me," she stated as her voice became shaky.
Jack walked down the aisle way toward Bugsy's stall, but hearing the emotion in her voice caused him to stop. Resting up against the barn wall, he listened…
"Why won't he talk to me, Bugs? He goes out with Lee and talks to him, but me…I get nothing. Maybe the only thing I'm good for is someone to sleep with…"
Jack wanted to reach out to her, to tell her that she was so much more than a warm bed companion. That he didn't see his life without her in it, and that he was so sorry that he had hurt her. Before he could say anything, Elizabeth continued in her one sided conversation with Bugsy.
Elizabeth brushed the shavings from her jeans as she stretched her legs out, "I just wish he'd talk to me. I'm scared about this move, and I just wish he wouldn't push me away," she stated, still certain that she was alone with her horse and her thoughts. "I need him, and I thought he needed me to," she stated softly.
"I do," Jack stated as he approached the stall door.
The sound of his voice startled her, and she felt her breath catch in her throat as she dropped her ice cream beside her in the shavings.
Elizabeth jumped up hoping to keep from wearing the dessert that she had yet to even taste.
Her heart pounded as she attempted to gain control of her breathing. "What are you doing here?"
"Looking for you," his voice had an apologetic tone.
Elizabeth didn't want to be mad. She wanted to jump up and wrap her arms around him. However, there was a part of her that was angry; that part of her that felt shunned, pushed aside, expendable, and that part won.
"I've been trying to talk to you, but you've done nothing but push me aside and pick fights. Maybe I don't want to talk now," she stated as she turned her back to him, walked over to Bugsy and wrapped her arms around his neck.
"You don't have to talk; I'll talk," he stated as he leaned over the bottom stall door.
"I've just felt somewhat overwhelmed," he began.
She couldn't help herself, "Overwhelmed? By what?"
"I guess everything. My life is changing so fast, and I just feel like I can't keep up," he attempted to explain.
"Everything? Does that include us?" She was finding it difficult to get the words passed the lump in her throat.
Before he could answer, she jumped in, "I mean we didn't really date for very long before we jumped into marriage. Maybe it was too soon for both of us."
His jaw dropped, "You don't believe that, do you?"
"I don't know but apparently you do," she remarked as she turned back toward Bugsy.
Jack opened the door and entered the stall, "Elizabeth, I love you. You have to know that…" he waited for a response, but received none. "You are the most important thing to me, and marrying you is without a doubt the best thing I have ever done in my life."
"Please look at me," Jack said softly as the emotion was readily noticeable in his voice.
She turned around but the look on her face showed that she was definitely worried.
"Elizabeth, I'm scared…I'm scared of not being a good husband; I'm scared of being home owners, but I'm most afraid of disappointing you, of letting you down," his voice was barely audible.
Elizabeth quickly responded, "Disappointing me? Jack, all I have ever asked is that you love me as I do you. Disappointment is a part of life; it's going to happen sometimes. Not everything is within your control." Her hands covered her mouth as she took a deep breath, "I'm so sorry if I did anything that added to the pressure you already felt."
Jack glanced down before bringing his eyes back up to meet hers, "Everyone thinks of me as having all the answers, of being so strong…"
"You are strong," she quickly reminded him. "But Jack, we're supposed to walk side by side, being strong for each other. You shouldn't have to carry all of the responsibility."
She looked down and took a deep breath, looking back at him as she exhaled, "You're always there for me; I'm sorry if I led you to feel that I wasn't there for you," her eyes watered as tears began to slip down her cheeks. "I'm so sorry Jack. I didn't realize the pressure you were under and how it was affecting you. Can you forgive me?"
She wrapped her arms around his neck and held on as if he were her shelter in an approaching storm. His arms around her waist pulled her tight to his body with neither one wanting to let go.
Each one repeated "I'm sorry" in between the soft, gentle kisses that they shared. She captured his face in her hands as her thumbs gently stroked his cheeks. The worrisome look on his face that lately she had unfortunately come to know began to fade slightly.
Bugsy nudged Elizabeth's back pushing them toward the door.
"Looks like someone wants us to leave," Elizabeth giggled.
Jack took her hand and led her toward the door, "Ready to go home?"
"Jack, any place is home as long as we're together," Elizabeth stated as she suddenly felt overcome. "I don't need the big house. Bugsy can stay here at Breckenridge. They love him, and we can get a townhouse, or an apartment that will allow Onyx. I just want to be with you," she stated through her tears.
His lips met hers, quieting her proclamation. Her lips were soft, always inviting, and he pressed her up against the stall wall as she felt his body pressed up against hers.
"I'm so sorry you felt that I was pushing you away," Jack remarked. "I don't want you to get use to living without me."
Elizabeth looked confused, "Why would you say that?"
Jack swallowed hard, "You left your journal open on the coffee table. I…I promise that I didn't read it; well not all of it anyway."
"You read my journal; my private thoughts?" She asked finding it hard to believe that he would violate her privacy.
"Not intentionally," he stated in his defense. "You left it open on the table. I sat down…I promise, I only saw the last sentence."
She pushed him off of her and walked toward the stall door.
"Please don't walk away," he called out to her.
Elizabeth stopped and Jack gently took her arm, turning her back toward him.
"I came home to talk. I'm sorry. I've been thinking only about myself; what I was going through, and what I was feeling," he explained.
"Jack, you left me at home and went to talk with Lee. You should have been talking to me," she remarked. "I've been feeling the same things. I've rented since I moved out on my own. If something broke the landlord fixed it. Once we move in, if something breaks, we have to fix it, and the thought of it is overwhelming."
She ran her hand across her face, removing any sign of the tears that had fallen. "The difference is I didn't freeze you out. I wanted to talk, but more importantly, I wanted to talk to you!"
He felt her eyes upon him, burning through him. "Elizabeth, I was wrong. I'm not used to having someone else to be responsible to…responsible for; to love someone so much that you would give up your life in the blink of an eye for them. I love you so much, and I never wanted to hurt you, but I have, and I just want to make it right with you."
Although she knew it previously, in that quick moment, in that brief span of time, she felt that he truly needed her. That she wasn't just a warm body for him to snuggle up to at night. She was his partner in all things, and he eloquently expressed his feelings for her, as if she really was unaware before.
Elizabeth held out her hand to him and their palms quickly kissed as their fingers entwined. He walked her to her Jeep and then she gave him a short ride down the driveway to his truck which sat in the parking lot by the highway. Before exiting the Jeep, he leaned over and kissed her as they each felt the emotional stirrings inside.
They pulled into the parking lot at their apartment and parked beside each other.
Jack was beside her door before it opened and he held out his hand to her. "I know it's late but will you go some place with me?" He asked.
She smiled, "Don't you know by now, I would go anywhere with you."
He took her hand and closed the door on her Jeep once she was outside. Elizabeth had only lived in the apartment complex since they married, which had only been a few months, but she assumed she knew everything about what was offered there.
They started walking to the opposite edge of the complex when she asked, "Where are we going?"
He laughed softly, "You said that you would go anywhere with me."
"And I will. I just kind of wanted to have an idea of where that might be," she stated with a welcoming smile.
"No questions. You'll know when we get there," he stated as they entered a path that was softly lit by the light of the moon.
They continued down the path as he pulled out his cell phone to help light the way. A short distance further and soft lights were noticeable through the trees.
"Jack, this place is beautiful. Why have you not brought me here before?" Elizabeth asked as she observed old timey street lights situated around a small pond. Off in the distance was a sand volleyball pit, grills for cookouts set in various locations near plentiful picnic tables, trees with swings, and a dock for fishing.
"It's usually very busy here. Often the teens from the surrounding neighborhoods hang out and it isn't as enjoyable as it is right now," he explained.
They walked over to a picnic table and took a seat.
"Can we talk?" He asked.
"Please, yes. I want to know what's on your mind," she replied.
"This is what I want, right here," he stated as he looked around.
"But Jack, we can stay here if you want, but I want to get Onyx back with us, and you know as well as I do, that won't happen here," Elizabeth reminded him.
"No, I know that. Wherever we live, and before we're too old to enjoy it, I want a place like this. A place to celebrate with our friends, or just to be alone," he stated as he leaned over and captured her lips.
"Jack, we don't have to take the house. We'll keep looking for exactly what you want," she replied.
"Elizabeth, do you like the house? I mean really like the house?" He asked. "Be honest."
"Well, if I'm being honest, yes, I love the house. That being said though, I can live without it. A cardboard box on the boardwalk would be home if you and Onyx were with me," she remarked.
He brought her hand up to his lips, and with a soft laugh he stated, "I don't think we need to go that far." He put his hand on the side of her face and stroked her cheek, "I'm sorry about everything. I love you, and if I'm being honest too, I love the farm. So let's do it," he stated as he leaned in and gently pressed his lips to hers. His tongue pushed against the seam of her lips and she welcomed him.
Jack laid her back on the picnic table as his tongue traced down her neck. His hand began working on the multiple buttons on her blouse.
Elizabeth placed her hand over top of his, "Not here."
"There's no one here," he whispered.
Elizabeth slipped out from under him, "Why is it that men have a thing for doing it outside? When we have a place like this of our own, then yes; until then, I prefer the privacy of our apartment."
"Are you ready to go home?" He asked.
"Oh, you're in a hurry now?" She responded.
"I have some making up to do with my wife," he said with a wink.
To be continued…
