I hurry down the steep, narrow, winding path toward the Pit, practically sprinting so I will make it on time for the first jumper to hit the net. I figured I had plenty of time when I received Will's message saying the new class of initiates were just getting ready to leave the Hub so I told Bridget I would put the girls down for their nap while she kept an eye on Tyler but they each wanted rocked and then a story, so 5 minutes turned into 10 and then 10 turned into an hour. After they were both sound asleep, I made sure Tyler was comfortable. He woke from his nap feeling a little better and even ate some chicken noodle soup, which he managed to keep down but he looked terrible, and I'm really worried about him. I gave Bridget strict instructions to call if there were any changes in his condition. I hated leaving him, and if it were any other day, I wouldn't have.
When I reach the seldom used, dimly lit, damp, musty hallway that leads to the net, my journey comes to a screeching halt when I get behind a large group of slow-moving, boisterous Dauntless members making their way to the celebration, half empty brown bottles in their hands. I try to squeeze my way passed but they don't budge so I end up walking with them, making small talk the entire way. When we reach the cavernous space, I'm finally able to break free after saying my goodbyes. As I make my way through the thick crowd gathered for the jump, I notice that the platform looks like it's in a spotlight. I smile as I take in the sight of my handsome husband and good friends until I see a familiar brunette who is sorely out of place. I take a deep breath, trying to mask my displeasure then head up the stairs.
"Hey, Tris! You made it just in time. They're jumping onto the roof as we speak," Christina says as she grabs me in a big bear hug. "How's Tyler doing? Four said he's sick."
"My poor little guy. I absolutely hated leaving him but he's doing a little bit better now," I say as I maneuver myself between Tobias and Freya, hoping I'm not being too obvious about it but Christina's smirk tells me she knows exactly what I'm doing. "He ate some soup and, thankfully, kept it down. He wasn't so lucky at breakfast."
"That's good," Tobias says. "He didn't look very good when I left."
"He still doesn't," I say, worry evident in my voice. He drapes his arm around my shoulder, pulls me close, and kisses my temple.
"He'll be fine, love," he softly says.
"I told Bridget to call if he needed me, and I would come straight home," I say.
"Okay," he says. I notice Freya eyeing Tobias' arm around me, and I can't help but smile at her, which she returns but it doesn't reach her eyes. She's never made a play for my husband like one red-headed bitch but her near-constant ogling is irritating as hell.
"Four told us about the terrible two and the marshmallow incident," Brody says with a deep, thoughtful laugh. He's changed so much since he jumped into the net two years ago, and I think it has everything to do with the young woman standing next to him looking up at him like he's the only one in the room. He's no longer a quiet, brooding loner. He's outgoing, feisty, thoughtful, and quite funny. He and Ana both fit in very well with our circle of friends.
"I swear if we were to let our girls loose on the city they would cause more damage than a tornado," Tobias says with a chuckle and everyone joins in. Freya laughs so hard she snorts, and we all look at her.
"What are you doing up here again?" Uriah asks, saving me from having to do it. If she didn't make googly eyes at my husband on a near daily basis, I'd feel sorry for her because she has no friends.
"I was giving Four an update from Zeke," she pouts.
"The first jumper will be here any minute," Tobias says. "You better join the crowd down below, Freya. Thanks for the information."
"You're welcome, Four," she beams. She just loves soaking up any drop of attention he gives her. I try not to let it bother me but it does. She turns on her heels and flounces down the stairs, her brunette ponytail swinging back and forth like a pendulum.
"She's got a crush on you, man," Uriah says, trying to hide a chuckle and Tobias sighs.
"Not you, too, man," he says.
"It's obvious," Ana says. "Tris, I don't know how you stand it. If someone looked at Brody that way, I'd take them out." She must be too busy looking at him herself to notice the scores of girls who follow him around with their eyes.
"Uriah's right," I say. "It's just a crush. She knows he's married. We made sure not to make the same mistake we made with the bi… with Olivia." Even after all this time, I hate the feel of her name on my tongue, and the scar on my hip pulsates with remembrance of the stabbing that could have taken my life. Brody and Ana look at each other and smile. "What?"
"We all knew you were married from day one," Brody says. This time Tobias and I look at each other.
"It was obvious by the way you two looked at each other," Ana says. "We knew you were in love, and Tris was pregnant. We put two and two together."
"It was also hard to miss your matching tattoos and wedding rings," he adds.
"We told them we were afraid they couldn't keep their hands to themselves," Christina says.
"I told them to keep it G rated because sex education wasn't part of the curriculum," Uriah snorts.
"Uri!" Tobias and I scold at the same time.
"You two can't take a joke," he murmurs. I roll my eyes at him.
"I can't believe you knew and never said anything," I say to Brody and Ana.
"I guess it never came up," she shrugs. A piercing scream causes the entire room to go silent, and we all look toward the sky. Unlike the past two years, the streak isn't entirely black but black and white. Candor. Only when the net cradles the frightened girl does she stop shrieking at the top of her lungs, and I recognize her immediately even though it's been nearly two years since I last saw her. I should have known though. She sounded just like her sister when she jumped.
"Rose," Christina whispers as she stands frozen on the platform, wide-eyed and mouth agape, while Brody and Tobias reach up and help her younger sister out of the net. I think I'm just as surprised to see her here as Christina is. Since I met her, she's been the very definition of Candor. I can't imagine what would have brought her here.
"Hi, Christy," Rose softly says as she faces her sister. She was always taller but now she towers over Christina, who is tall in her own right. And she looks so much like their mother with her slick, side-parted, chin-length bob and wary dark brown eyes. She takes a step toward us but the look on Christina's face tells her that a hug would be inappropriate.
"Christina, would you like to do the honors?" I ask, breaking from tradition. Usually one of the initiate's instructors makes the announcement but I don't think Brody and Ana will mind under the circumstances.
She clears her throat, gathering her wits and yells loudly for all to hear, "First jumper … Rose." Rose is caught off guard when the Dauntless members emerge from the shadows and start their customary celebratory shouting, whistling, stomping, and fist pumping but soon a huge smile unfurls on her face. Christina puts her hand on her sister's back, leans in, and quietly says, "We'll talk later. I'm glad you're here," then directs her down the steps to where Will is standing just as another jumper silently drops toward the net like a rock.
"Okay," Rose says then she slowly and carefully descends the stairs taking in her surroundings.
"Who was that?" Brody asks.
"My sister. I can't believe she left Candor," Christina says as Tobias and Uriah help a petite blonde-haired, blue-eyed Erudite girl out of the net. "I totally forgot she turned 16 on her last birthday. I had no idea she would be choosing today. Poor Mom. I'll have to call her later and check on her. She's all alone now." Christina seems preoccupied as we watch initiate after initiate fall into the net. I'd love to talk to her about it but I know now's not the time.
So far, we have equal numbers of transfers and Dauntless-born but there are still several left to jump according to Shauna who's still on the roof. She's been giving us steady updates throughout the process. We look toward the giant opening in the ceiling and watch as yet another black and white streak falls from the sky. Great! Another Candor know it all. They seem to be the ones who take the longest to conform to Dauntless ways. Brody and Tobias reach up to help the large boy out of the net. When he looks up and our eyes meet, I can't help my startled gasp. I swear I'm looking into the eyes of a ghost.
"Holy shit!" Christina murmurs barely above a whisper. I imagine I only hear it because we're standing so close to one another. I study the familiar-looking stranger when he's on two feet, and my body begins to tremble, and I have trouble breathing. He has the same kind face and soulful dark brown eyes that he did. He's a big guy just like he was. He has the same five o'clock shadow he did. I take a small step closer and a sweet, fresh aroma I haven't smelled in three years overwhelms my senses and clings to my nostrils. If I hadn't seen him pulled out of the chasm myself, I would swear Al was standing right here in front of me.
"What's your name?" I ask, my voice shaky with apprehension.
"Oliver," he says, studying me carefully. They have to be related. He even sounds like Al right down to the soft, bass vibrato.
"Welcome to Dauntless, Oliver," I say. The moment the sentiment leaves my lips, I regret it. I don't know why I said it. We don't individually welcome initiates to Dauntless. As we stand staring at each other a small smile turns up his lips.
"You need to wait at the end of the stairs with the other initiates," Tobias gruffly says, pointing in their direction. Oliver nods and turns to go down the stairs and stumbles a little over his large feet but rights himself quickly. I finally tear my eyes away from Al's, I mean Oliver's, back and meet my husband's worried gaze.
"That has to be his brother, right?" Uriah asks what we're all thinking as we wait for the next jumper. Uri, Christina, Tobias, and I stand silent and shell-shocked on the platform while Brody and Ana look at each other, confused. As I close my eyes and take a deep breath, my last conversation with Al replays through my mind.
"Are you all right, love?" Tobias quietly asks, his mouth near my ear. He takes my hand in his and squeezes it tightly.
"I honestly don't know," I say, sounding hollow. "I thought I dealt with my feelings about Al a long time ago. I never thought he'd be standing before me again, living and breathing."
"It's. Not. Him. Tris," he slowly says, his voice dripping with anxiety.
I know, echoes inside my head but instead, "He looks just like him," comes out of my mouth.
"Tris, it can't be him," Christina says. "We saw him as he was being hauled out of the chasm." I remember. I remember his open, vacant eyes; his lifeless blue lips; his body swollen with water and I shudder. "It's not him." I can tell Brody and Ana are wondering about my reaction, hell all our reactions, to the innocuous teen but there isn't time for an explanation as a red and yellow streak, the first today, falls into the net. Amity. That's a first in years actually. Uriah and Christina help her out.
"Maybe you should go home and get some rest," Tobias says as Ana asks the young girl her name.
"No, I'll be fine," I say, still somewhat frazzled. "Seeing him just shook me up. I hope there are no more surprises today." Just as the words cross my lips, my phone buzzes. I sigh as I pull it out, and worry makes my heart pound heavily in my chest when I see it's Bridget calling. "Hi, Bridget. Is Tyler okay?"
"No, I'm afraid he's not, Tris," she says, something close to panic in her voice. My eyes fly to Tobias', and he's immediately on guard. "He just woke up from his nap, and his stomach is hurting really badly. What should I do?"
"Hold on just a second," I say. I hang my arm at my side, the phone suddenly feeling like it weighs a ton. "Christina?" She turns at the sound of my strained voice and concern overtakes her face. "Can Bridget drop the girls off with Fiona and Liam? We need to get Tyler to the infirmary as soon as possible."
"Of course," she says. "What's wrong with him?"
"I don't know," I say, my voice emotionless. Tobias has taught me well the past three years, and I can now emulate Four flawlessly, shutting my emotions down. I'm afraid to feel anything at the moment for fear of breaking down, and then I would be of no use to anyone. "Will you give her a heads up that they're coming?"
"Yeah," she says and immediately pulls her phone out and sends a quick text.
"Bridget, take the girls to Will and Christina's. Fiona is expecting them, then get Tyler to the infirmary as quickly as you can.
"Tell her I'll meet her," Tobias says then he rushes off down the stairs, through the thick crowd, which parts like the Red Sea, and into the gaping mouth of the black tunnel.
"Four will meet you on the path, and I'll see you in the infirmary."
"Okay, Tris," she says then hangs up.
"Four and I have to go, guys," I hurriedly say over my shoulder as I hustle down the steps. "Tyler's sick and we have to take him to the infirmary." The agonized look on my face keeps Dauntless members at bay until I nearly reach the tunnel entrance. That's when Zander reaches out and stops me.
"What's going on, Tris?" he asks. I glance behind him and see Stella worriedly standing there. "Four ran out of here like a bat out of hell."
"There's something wrong with Tyler," I choke, then gather myself. "Four went to get him." Zander puts his hand on the small of my back and rushes me out of the cavernous room, shooting medical questions at me one right after another. "Do you know what's wrong with him, Zander?"
"I don't want to speculate before examining him, Tris," he says as we rush through the doors of the infirmary. "Emily, Four is bringing Tyler in for an examination. Have him brought to exam room 12 STAT."
"Yes, doctor," the faceless nurse behind the intake desk says. I follow Zander through the freshly painted hallways into one of the newly remodeled examination rooms, practically having to run to keep up with him. Over the past two years the infirmary has had a complete overhaul, top to bottom. Erudite provided the latest, most up-to-date equipment. Two full-time physicians were transferred from the city hospital because we were so short staffed that Zander was working more than 12 hours a day 7 days a week and never getting any time with his family. But the best part of the remodel for me was the fact that Isobel has been assigned to the infirmary full-time. I love having her here; I wish she was here right now.
As I lower myself into one of the black leather chairs in the corner by the examination table, I can't help but wonder why he brought us to the furthest room from the waiting area but I don't get a chance to ask because he leaves as soon as I get settled. I continually wring my hands as both my knees jump around nervously of their own accord. Stella sits quietly beside me with her arm around me, trying to comfort me but unfortunately it does no good. I practice the deep breathing exercises Tobias taught me when we found out I was pregnant until I hear familiar crying, and I jump to my feet and rush out into the hallway.
"But I want my mommy!" Tyler cries at the top of his lungs, making my heart twist painfully.
"She's right here, buddy," Tobias says, obviously distressed. He carefully places him in my arms, and I hug him to me tightly.
"My tummy hurts so bad, Mommy," he says, tears streaming down his cheeks. I loosen my grip and carry him from the hallway into the exam room, kissing the moisture away and sit down on the paper-covered examination table.
"I'm sorry, Tyler," I say, trying to swallow down the suffocating guilt. I shouldn't have left him. "I'm so sorry." I place my hand in his. "You squeeze my hand as tightly as you can when your tummy hurts. Okay?"
"Okay," he says then bears down on my fingers. He's obviously in a lot of pain.
"Zander's going to examine you and figure out what's going on."
"Don't leave me!" he screams, his eyes wild. I hold him close to my chest and gently rock him back and forth like I used to when he would have a bad dream. He slowly calms down then I lean back a little and look in his face
"Hey, Mommy and Daddy aren't going anywhere, baby," I say. "I promise."
"I waked up and you was gone," he pouts.
"I know and I'm so sorry but I had to go work," I softly say. I've never felt guiltier about being a working mother than I do right now.
"How are you feeling, Tyler?" Zander asks as he walks in the room and shuts the door behind him.
"My tummy hurts. Bad," he groans. Zander performs a thorough examination, asking tons of questions as he goes along. I'm very proud that Tyler can answer most of them by himself but it also makes me sad because he's growing up too fast. Zander takes his temperature, which is quite high now. He listens to his heart and lungs. He checks his ears, nose, and throat then feels all around his neck and upper body. He also asks him if anything else hurts besides his tummy, which I'm surprised I didn't think to do, and Tyler tells him his throat and ears hurt, too.
"Can you lie down on the table and show me where it hurts? Your mommy can keep holding your hand." I help him lie down on the examination table and stand at his head. He holds tightly to my hand, although I don't know if it's from pain or fear. "Where does it hurt?"
"Everywhere," he moans.
"Everywhere," Zander murmurs. "Let's see if we can narrow that down, okay?" Then he begins lightly pressing all over his tummy but Tyler doesn't react until he reaches slightly lower and to the right of his navel then he cries out.
"When's the last time he vomited?" he asks, looking at me.
"Did you get sick after your soup?" I ask and he shakes his head. "After breakfast, which was a single slice of toast." He nods.
"I'm going to need a blood sample. You can hold him, Tris," Zander says. "Isobel will be right in to draw his blood. She's great with children."
"What do you think it is?" Tobias asks as I pick Tyler up and sit down on the table. I hold him close and caress his cheek, and I notice his eyes starting to droop. My poor boy. He's exhausted.
"It could be several things," he says. "I need the blood test to rule a few out." He gives us a sorrowful look then heads out into the hallway and disappears around the corner. Tobias sits on the table next to us, puts his arm around me, and pulls us close.
"I feel awful," I quietly say so only he can hear me. "I should have been with him, not Bridget."
"Love, it's not your fault he's sick," he says.
"It feels that way." He kisses my temple and then kisses Tyler's head. We're quiet as we wait for Isobel, knowing there's nothing either of us can do to make his pain go away.
"Hi, guys," she says as she walks into the room not a minute later, thankfully pulling me from my dreary thoughts. "I hear you're not feeling well, Tyler. I sure am sorry to hear that. I'm going to take a little blood right out of your arm." He tenses in my embrace when she says that. "It will just be one little poke. I'll fill this half full," she holds up a glass vial with a blue stopper in the top, "then it will be all done. Can you count to 15?"
"Yeah," he shyly says. In his traumatized state he might not remember that Isobel has been to our house several times with her husband, Carter, and their kids, Alec, Jace, and Claire. She wanted to name her baby girl Clary after a character in the same book she got her boys' names but Carter put his foot down … threw a full-fledged fit is more like it … so they compromised and named her Claire Marie after his mother. Isobel told me that it's close enough to Clary that she didn't mind compromising and calls her Clary just to piss Carter off.
"I'm going to wipe off your arm with this alcohol swab first." She holds up a little square package then takes his little arm and gently presses around until she finds a suitable vein then cleanses the area thoroughly. She picks up a butterfly needle and says, "You're going to feel a little poke then I want you, Mommy, and Daddy to all slowly count to 15 then it will be over. Okay?"
"Okay," he whimpers.
"I need you to sit really still for me, Tyler. Okay?" He nods. "All right, here comes the poke." I tighten my grip on him as she puts the needle in his arm, and he winces but does a great job of sitting still then we start counting. True to her word, when we reach 15 she's all done and a neon green band-aid is in place over the small wound. "I'm putting a rush on this. When Dr. Parrish gets the results, he'll be back in to talk to you. It won't be long, I promise."
"Do you know what he's looking for?" I ask, sounding weary.
"Abnormal values in bloodwork tell a valuable story," she says. "It'll give the doctor a better idea of what's going on. He'll be in soon, guys. I know it may be difficult but try not to worry. Feel better, Tyler." I look down at my boy and his eyes are closed, and he seems to be sleeping.
"Thanks, Isobel," Tobias says and we watch as she walks out of the room. "Why don't we sit in the chairs? They're more comfortable. I'll take him."
"No!" I gruffly say and immediately regret it. God, I have a lot of regrets today. "I'm sorry, baby. I shouldn't have snapped at you. None of this is your fault." I immediately understand his disapproving look but I still hold myself responsible. "Yes, I'd like to sit in the chairs." Once we get situated, I realize Stella is no longer here. "Do you know where Stella went?"
"Not really," he says. "She stepped out while Zander was examining Tyler." I don't know if our conversation wakes him up or if it is the pain but he drags his eyes open and starts crying again. Maybe it's the stress of the situation because I feel like crying, too. After trying to comfort him for a few minutes, Tobias jumps to his feet in a rage and stomps out of the room.
"Where did Daddy go?" Tyler mutters, forlornly. "Is he mad at me?"
"Oh, God! Of course he's not mad at you, my sweet boy," I say, my heart twisting painfully. "Why would you think such a thing? Mommy and Daddy are just worried. We don't like that you're in pain and nothing is being done about it. He's upset but not at you."
"But where did he go?" he asks again.
"He came to get me," Zander says as he walks into the room with Tobias on his heels or should I say Four because his emotions are tightly bottled up at the moment, probably for fear of losing it. "I need to speak to you and Four in the hallway, Tris."
"Absolutely not," I vehemently say, shaking my head. "I promised Tyler I wouldn't leave him. I'm not breaking that promise."
"All right," he says, reaching out and squeezing my shoulder. "Four, please sit down." Tobias begrudgingly does as he's asked as Zander pulls up his rolling doctor's stool in front of us and sits down. "Based on Tyler's physical examination and blood work, he has double ear infection and strep throat but what worries me is that he also has the classic symptoms of appendicitis so I'm ordering an abdominal ultrasound and CT scan. Depending on the results, he may need to have surgery."
