"I don't know how you got here, but you're headed straight back to Hell where you belong!" declared the largest of a group of Ogres. Raditz was staring up at the planet above them. Raditz's training with Dabura was complete, and now he was to join Kakarot to train under this King Kai. It would be a hard sell, but Raditz just so happened to have most of the truth on his side. Explaining his body would be the hardest.
"I'm exactly where I need to be," Raditz said.
"You're not getting to King Kai's," the Ogres stepped towards him. Raditz faced them, and clenched his fists.
"I imagine it's a long way down. You may want to brace yourself," Raditz warned, and charged the biggest. To his surprise, the Ogre caught Raditz's charge, barely budging. Raditz started to jab him in the side, which did force the Ogre to try and reel back from Raditz, which allowed the Saiyan to push the Ogre up and over. Raditz held the Ogre over his head, and with a heave, tossed the Ogre over the edge of Snake Way.
"GET HIM!" the other Ogres shouted, and they rushed Raditz. Just as they did, Raditz saw his brother running towards them on Snake Way.
Damn! He'll only have questions if he sees me fighting these guys! I'll have to hide my true power...Last time I fought King Yemma, he trounced me…
"Kakarot! Help!"
"Raditz? What are you doing here?" Goku wondered, and he watched for a few moments while the Ogres started to 'beat down' Raditz.
"Okay, that's enough, he's down, leave him alone!" Goku shouted. The Ogres started to lift him up to try and throw him off the side.
"Don't let them send me back! I don't want to go back, please, Kakarot! Help me!" Raditz pleaded. Goku charged forward, punching out one of the Ogres off the side. Raditz slipped, and grabbed the side of Snake Way while Goku got into the middle of the mob and started fighting them. Individually, they weren't much of a challenge, but together, they were enough to give Goku some trouble.
Deciding it wasn't worth risking Goku being sent over the edge, Raditz pulled himself up, and joined his brother in fighting the Ogres. Together, they punted them off one by one, until there was one last Ogre, who decided safety was the better part of valor, and began running down Snake Way away from the Saiyans.
"Whew! That was a close one! Thank you for saving me, Kakarot!" Raditz said.
"What are you doing here? Are you here to stop me from getting to King Kai's place?" Goku demanded, sliding into a fighting stance. Raditz held up his hands to placate him.
"No, of course not, Kakarot! I'm here to talk to King Kai, actually. I heard about him in Hell, and that he can contact the mortal world. I have to warn Earth!" Raditz said.
"Warn Earth? You tried to take it over!"
"I tried to take the Dragonballs, and you. I planned on sparing the Earth. No, Kakarot, your friends are in danger! I have to warn them! I had hoped King Kai would help me. I didn't expect to see you at all!" Raditz said. Dabura had told Raditz to come up with a story to convince King Kai and Goku, but he hadn't thought of one; now, though, it was starting to come together.
"Warn them about what?"
"This is what I tried to tell you on Earth! Kakarot, we have family. Our mother is still alive, and she is paired with General Nappa, a powerful warrior of our people. Together, we all serve Prince Vegeta, the last member of our Royal line. Our mother and Nappa had a daughter, our half-sister, Brussa. I'm sure that our mother is on her way now, but she won't arrive for almost seven months. But Brussa, she should be nearly to Earth by now, and she'll be furious that we've been killed. I don't know what your squad is doing, but they have to be ready for her; she's almost as powerful as I am. If they're caught off-guard, she could cause a lot of damage to your world. Even if your friends do overpower her, I don't want her to get hurt, either. Kakarot, she's our sister. Please, will you help me talk to King Kai?"
"Woah, my mother and my sister? That's wild...This better not be a trick, Raditz!"
"No tricks, Kakarot! I just want to save our sister, and your friends, if I can. It wasn't until I arrived on earth that I started to appreciate its beauty and its food. Please, I want the chance to change!"
"All right. We'll see what King Kai says, then. Where...Where is it?"
Raditz pointed up, "I think that's it up there. Maybe we should jump?"
"Last one there is a rotten egg!" Goku let out a laugh and jumped towards the little planet.
"Hey, no fair!" Raditz jumped after him. Goku stuck his tongue out at Raditz on the way towards the little planet, only to let out a yelp as it pulled him in faster and faster, until he landed hard enough on the surface to leave a dent. Raditz, however, landed softly and gracefully on the planet.
"Are you okay, Kakarot? Why are you down there?" Raditz asked.
"It's...So heavy...Why aren't you struggling?" Goku said. Raditz dhrugged.
"It's not that heavy, it's just like Planet Vegeta. I grew up with this kind of gravity. Kind of comfortable, actually. I can see why Earth left you so weak, Kakarot, with its light gravity."
"It's so...Intense…" Goku managed to get to his knees, but fell back down.
"Come on, Kakarot! This is your homeworld's gravity! Don't be a weakling, stand up already! We're on the planet of King Kai! You can do this!"
Goku managed to get to his feet, and started taking steps, "I can...I can do this! It's not...Too...Far! Wait...Is that? I knew it, food!"
Goku changed direction from walking towards the house towards the fruit tree. Raditz let out a snort, and followed his brother to the tree.
"This is part of your training, it must be! Go on, get us the fruit, Kakarot! I'm hungry, too!"
"I've got this!" Goku declared, trying to climb the tree.
"Ka-ka-rot! Ka-ka-rot!" Raditz chanted as Goku climbed the tree's trunk. Egged on by his brother, Goku managed to get to the lowest branches, and used them to hoist himself up.
"Ooh-ooh-ah! Oo-ooh-ah!" a monkey chanted along with Raditz. Raditz stared at the monkey.
"What...What is that…"
"Hey, Raditz, I made it! Heads up! Whoops!" Goku called down. He pulled off one of the apples, and dropped it; the apple hit the ground hard enough to leave a hole.
"Kakarot! Watch it!" snarled Raditz, "Drop another one, I'm hungry! I'll catch it this time!"
"Okay, Raditz! Here you go!" Goku pulled another, and this time Raditz caught the apple, and took a bite.
"Kakarot, throw a third one! There's some kind of strange creature down here, I think it's hungry, too."
"What kind of creature?" Goku peeked through the branches, "Oh, hello! It's a monkey!"
"Oh. Right. Because of the tail, and the fur. Right. Well, I think it's hungry."
"Okay! I'll drop another one!" Goku pulled one off, "Jeez these are heavy!"
"Stop being a weakling, Kakarot!" Raditz sneered, catching the apple, and handing it to the money. The monkeys accepted the fruit, and started nibbling on the apple, before letting out some happy cheers and dancing around.
"Do you think that's King Kai?" Goku asked.
"No. This planet isn't very big, he has to be around here somewhere. Hello? King Kai? Is there anybody here?" Raditz called out, taking a bite of the apple. Goku started to climb out of the tree, but lost his balance, landing on the ground, putting another ditch in the yard. Raditz turned, looked at him, and then went back to calling for King Kai.
"You don't have to shout, I'm right here!" a nasally voice called out. A plump, blue man with antennae waddled out from behind the house, "Who are you, and what are you doing on my planet?"
"Oh! Are you...Ugh, I'm so heavy! Are you King Kai?" Goku asked, struggling to stand and rubbing his head. He picked up the apple he'd grabbed
"Yup, that's me! Now, who are you two?" King Kai asked.
"Well, my name is Goku. I'm from Earth. Our guardian, Kami, sent me to train under you!"
"Oh. And who are you?"
"Me? Oh, um, I'm Raditz, I'm his older brother. I came to ask for your help, for a, uh, related matter," Raditz said.
"All right, well...Let's start, then. Why don't oysters donate to charity?"
Raditz and Goku stared at him.
"Go on! Why don't oysters donate to charity?"
"Because...They're...Making their own pearls?" Raditz asked. King Kai stared at him.
"Because they're shellfish," King Kai said. Raditz and Goku exchanged glances. King Kai let out a frustrated huff.
"All right, let's try a different one. What's a fly without wings?"
"Um...A fall?" Goku asked.
"A WALK! Jeez, humor doesn't run in your family, does it?" King Kai growled.
"Oh, I know one our father told me! A Saiyan walked into a bar. When he came to, he bent it in half to make it tender!" Raditz shouted, pointing at King Kai.
King Kai stared at Raditz, his mouth agape. Raditz held still, watching for King Kai's reaction.
"A saiyan...Walks into...A...Bar…" King Kai stammered.
Raditz let out a slight whimper.
"Bar...Tender…"
The sons of Bardock remained frozen in place.
"BARTENDER! OH WOW THAT'S A GOOD ONE! BAH-HAHAHAHA!" King Kai clutched at his gut, bent over as he let out a laugh. Raditz let out a sigh of relief.
"All right!" King Kai suddenly stopped his laughing, and the both of them stood up straight, "Now your turn. Goku, was it? Tell me a joke. Make me a laugh, and you're in."
"A joke? Come on, I'm not a comedian! Oh, man…"
"Don't stay so tense, you'll ruin the delivery! Come on, if you can't tell me one joke you might as well give up and go home!" King Kai taunted while Goku racked his brain for a joke.
"Why...Did the chicken...CROSS THE ROAD?"
King Kai let out a gasp, "To...Get to the other side?"
Goku smiled, but steeled himself; he wasn't laughing yet, "IT WAS TOO FAR TO FLY!"
King Kai held his hands to his mouth.
"Yes, Kakarot! You have him on the ropes! Give him another!" Raditz called out.
"What's the difference between a jeweler and a jailer? A jeweler sells watches, and a jailer watches cells!"
King Kai gasped again, rolled over onto the ground, pounding at it.
"Hah! Got it! You laughed, King Kai!" Goku called out, "Somebody stop me! Hey, King Kai, don't blow a gasket on me, okay?"
"All right, all right, you're in! When I'm through with the two of you, you'll be the princes of puns! How does that grab you?" King Kai told them.
"Puns? We're not here for puns! We're here for punches!" Raditz shouted.
King Kai started to laugh again.
"That's not funny! We're here for serious business!" Raditz insisted.
"All right, you should have led with that!" King Kai said, moving into a martial arts stance, "Show me what you've got! Goku, you first! Don't hold back, I'm stronger than I look!"
Goku got into his own fighting stance, but something about it seemed to slack.
"What's wrong?" King Kai asked.
"It's this gravity! I just can't seem to get used to it!" Goku admitted.
"Oh, right, you said you were from Earth, didn't you? That explains it. My planet may look small, but its gravity is ten times as strong as Earth's," King Kai explained.
"It feels normal to me," Raditz said, "But I'm from Planet Vegeta. It is normal."
"Mm-hmm, that sounds about right. Why don't you jump, to test just how far you can?" King Kai instructed. Goku nodded, and leapt into the air, before falling down into another crater. Raditz watched King Kai and the contemplative expression he had.
What an oddball. What's going through his mind?
"So," King Kai stood over Goku, who pushed himself back to his feet, "How long do you plan on staying here?"
"Well, as long as I can," Goku said, "It's like this: There's a bunch of people, and they're real powerful and real mad. They're called Saiyans, and they're going to hurt a lot of people, including my family and friends!"
Raditz nodded, "They're our family, too. I want to make sure that nobody gets hurt when they do arrive, I think there's a way to stop them from hurting each other!"
"Oh, yeah, Saiyans can be a real bad bunch, that's for sure. All right, let's find the exact day that they're going to arrive on planet Earth," King Kai said, his antennae twitching forward. King Kai started to hum and haw as he scanned the galaxy, "Let's see, where are they...Ah, yes, there they are. Three of them. I'm afraid they don't come any stronger than them. Alright. According to my calculations, they should arrive on Earth in approximately eighty-eight days."
"What? Eighty-eight days? No!" Raditz balked, "That means Brussa is already there! King Kai, I have to contact her and make sure she's okay!"
"We can make that happen, but there's a lot to consider here. Goku, these three Saiyan are even stronger than I am, and one of them, your mother, is particularly enraged at your death. So you're not only going to have to get to my level, you're going to have to surpass me. But this is the palace to do it, training on my planet is the equivalent of training for several thousand years on Earth, okay?" King Kai explained.
"Even stronger than you? Wow…" Goku let out a whistle.
"More powerful than Nappa in such a short amount of time? Well, if you say so, King Kai, we're ready!" Raditz insisted. King Kai gave him a grim look.
"I'll agree to train Goku, but you're another matter entirely, Raditz," he said.
"What? But I want to get stronger, too!" Raditz said.
"And what are you going to do with that strength? I've watched your career, Raditz. You've killed billions in your quest for power and wealth. Only Goku has the heart to be the champion that Earth needs right now. I won't be party to your kind of evil, Raditz," King Kai told him. Raditz clenched his fists.
"You're wrong!"
"Oh?"
"There is another! My mother, the one you're so afraid of? I know she had blood on her hands, but she's only ever done so to make sure the Saiyan race survives! If you can calculate the time they'll arrive, then you can see the yoke she's been under! But imagine, if she had gone to Earth with Kakarot, instead of suffering under Prince Vegeta, can you imagine the protector Earth would have had? Her love for her family, for everyone around her, even Vegeta, is greater than everything but the cruelest tyrant! I've seen into her heart, and I know, she is where Kakarot gets that heart you so treasure!"
Raditz knelt before King Kai, "I know I'm not my mother. I know I've done horrible things, even relished in them. But we're on the verge of something great, something new. A new era for my people, for my family. Please, if my mother gives into her rage, she'll never come back. But if I can stand up to her, stand up to Vegeta, then I know I can do good, and fix my mistakes! We might even be able to stop Lord Freeza! I beg of you, King Kai, let me take this chance!"
King Kai looked down to Raditz, "I never thought I'd have a Saiyan kneeling before me. Your people have a lot of pride. It must have taken a lot of strength to do that."
Raditz looked to Goku, "My people are my pride. I'll do anything for them."
King Kai took a deep breath, "I'm not sure."
"He hurt a lot of people on Earth, including my son. Your own nephew. You threw him off a cliff, Raditz!" Goku said. Raditz nodded.
"I spent the week training your son. I knew he wouldn't get hurt from the fall. I only did that to distract you, I never would truly hurt Gohan. You have a special boy, and I'm proud to call him my nephew. He has so much potential, more than I ever had. And I knew you wouldn't let him get hurt, either," Raditz explained.
Goku crossed his arms, "Well...I dunno…"
"Please, Kakarot. I only fought you and your friends, and one human that attacked me. I trained Gohan using techniques that were used on me. I didn't kill anyone on Earth! Only your Namekian friend has done that!" Raditz pleaded.
"King Kai? Can you check and see if that's true?" Goku asked.
"Hmm, let me check," King Kai flipped his antennae again, scanning Earth, "Well, he did scare the bejeezus out of one family, and made a mess of their house. He forced them to cook for him, but aside from the dad, none of them look hurt."
"That's the one who shot me! I needed a place to keep Gohan and to rest and eat. If I'd have been able to pay them, I would have!" Raditz insisted.
King Kai grumbled, "I'm not sure I believe you entirely, but it looks like you're telling the truth. Goku? I'll leave it up to you."
Goku contemplated his brother, prostrated before him and King Kai, "Well, I never had a brother before. So I guess it's okay."
"Really, Kakarot? Do you mean it?" Raditz's face lit up.
"Yeah! You and me, we'll protect the Earth! But you've got to promise not to hurt anyone that's weak, and don't kill anybody!"
"Of course! Our father was a protector of our world, and I yearn to live up to his legacy! I'll follow your lead, Kakarot. Just, please, I know how wicked our people can be, but we have to give them a chance!" Raditz said.
"The Saiyans have been given plenty of chances," King Kai said. He looked Raditz up and down, "But...If you're serious...I think it could be worth it. All right. Let's get started. Raditz, I'm going to have you and Goku on the same regimen, even though you're already almost as powerful as I am. But you've still got a lot to learn. Goku, I want you to do everything you can to keep up with your brother. When you're done here, you'll be just as powerful as each other. Got that?"
"Got it!" they said together.
"Good. Now, your first task…"
Raditz and Goku stood side by side, the same excited expression on their faces.
"...Is to catch my monkey, Bubbles."
