Knut had no idea it was morning until Antigonus entered the kitchen. When the escort gasped at seeing the boy there, Knut realized he'd actually pulled an all-nighter.
He had always wanted to stay up an entire night, and now he'd done it. It wasn't exactly his picture of the perfect all-nighter, though.
His picture of the best all-nighter would have been staying up with his best friend Ged. They would have dinner with Knut's parents, preferably Mama's beef and noodles but Knut wasn't picky. Mr. P would let Knut pray, just because he knew how much Knut liked it. He'd be happy holding Ged's warm hand in his left and his mother's in his right. They would eat and be together, and discuss everything from school to the Bible to the best color to paint walls. Ged was family, he was practically a Passerini already. They would eat and the boys would help with dishes, and then the family would play a game, whatever was lying around. Then, Knut's parents would go to bed and the boys would stay up, playing and talking and just… Being together.
But he was here. Alone.
When he had needed his friend the most, Ged was nowhere to be found. Knut had expected it, but dared to hope. But the rejection, the accusations, the dehumanizing, the questioning of faith, it was all just as bad as Knut thought it would be.
Knut loved being a pan Christian. He loved having his identity in Christ, and he loved identifying as pan. He loved the thought of being a pastor someday, and reaching out to kids like him, who felt broken. If he weren't here, after all.
Coming out was a conversation that terrified Knut. It was so hard to validate himself, and it was hard to gage how his parents would react. The very thought made him sick, so much that he started to float away from the world. He became numb, he couldn't find joy in everything. He knew he just had to get it out.
He was so blessed to have his parents. His mother's hugs were so warm and comforting, and his father immediately pulled the Bible out and showed him some verses.
"But what if they tell me I can't be both?" Knut had asked, staring at the words on the paper.
"Then you tell them your Dad's a bi pastor and that's that."
Knut was crying, but he giggled a little bit. It was the first joy he'd felt in months and months.
But, of course, there was still that part of Knut that wished he'd never come out. It was just so hard to be a pan Christian sometimes. Sure, he could take the dirt, he wasn't afraid. He had been able to stand strong in his faith through all of it.
But that rejection, that disgust that was in Ged's eyes, looking at Knut as if he was a cockroach as opposed to a human, standing in front of him and letting out his single biggest vulnerability, it didn't go away too easily. Knut wasn't afraid. He'd keep trying. The last thing he wanted was to lose the person he loved so much. He could take it. He would take it.
Ged did visit him after the reaping. It was a bit of a surprise, but Knut always knew his friend would take a stand someday. He ran in and hugged Knut like the world was ending. His pain hurt Knut, but it was pain that he had to feel before he could be healed. It was the first time Knut couldn't pray. He was just so angry, and upset, and hurt. He missed his father. He felt lost, he felt doubt. He was just… Not in a place that he really wanted to seek out the Lord.
It was hard to not be mad at Ged. He had left when Knut needed him the most. He had been part of the problem, after all. Even if he didn't know any better, it was still painful. But, Knut believed in forgiveness, even if it was hard.
"What are you doing, boy?" Antigonus asked, glancing down at where Knut was still kneeling. When the boy stood up, he was hit by how tired he really was. He had been in and out of it, but he hadn't actually slept.
"Sorry Sir," Knut said quietly.
"No problem, boy. You have an hour before you have to wake up. Go on now."
Knut felt a bubble of guilt, as he'd told Duff that he'd soon follow when the older boy went to bed, but had gotten so lost in his thoughts and prayers that he stayed up. Knut was exhausted, lying down in the bed that was meant for him.
For the first time, the weight on his chest had disappeared. He felt a wave of peace wash over him. His last thought before dozing off was how God made his presence known in the darkest of times.
Knut wasn't afraid.
.
Knut didn't want to get out of bed the next morning, but he did so reluctantly. He washed his face, got dressed, brushed his teeth, and styled his hair. He was the first out to the kitchen, taking a small breakfast. Whatever peace he might have had was replaced by the bubbling of fear deep in his stomach. He tried not to let it show when he ate, though. He wouldn't give Antigonus the pleasure of seeing him crack.
Duff came out last, walking slowly as if he were at a funeral. He looked awful, with dark circles under his eyes and hair disheveled.
"Morning," Antigonus said, as Duff got food and ate slowly.
"Hi," Duff said quietly, getting himself some breakfast.
"How're you feeling then?" he asked both of them.
"Nervous," Duff said.
"Of course you are," Antigonus said. His eyes glinted with something, some kind of satisfaction, pride, that made Knut's gut flare.
"And you, boy?"
Knut took a deep breath, the flame of rebellion burning bright in his chest. He looked his Capitol escort in the face and spoke clearly. "I'm not scared."
Duff looked up, surprised. Knut was satisfied at how Antigonus's face twisted with the response, and he didn't ask anymore questions. Knut flipped the wooden charm, the cross, around his necklace and felt no shame.
After they were done eating, Duff and Knut took one last walk around the eighth floor with their last moments together before they'd have to go.
"Did you mean it? That you're not afraid?" Duff bit his lip.
"Yeah. I did."
"How? You're… Are you still going to…"
Knut, in a moment that he couldn't fully explain, took the necklace off of his neck and put it in Duff's hand. Knut didn't need it anymore.
"I'm not going to fight. I'm going to try to stop this. I've accepted the fact that I'll probably not make it. But I'm not afraid."
"H-How-"
"Because. I know the Most High rules. That's the great thing, Duff. The Capitol didn't just pick on us because we're easy targets. They target us because they're afraid of us. They target us because we are a threat to them. We are a threat to their rule. We refuse to bow to them." Knut's green eyes were alight with fire. "We know that no matter who thinks they're in control, the Most High rules. We're not afraid of them like they want us to be. And we never will be. They can keep killing us, but that doesn't mean we're going to be afraid." With each word he spoke, Knut felt more and more confident, more and more defiant, stronger and stronger. "We will never bow to them. And that's what defiance is about. My father was a martyr, but he died knowing that he was saved! That no matter who persecutes us and destroys us, we will never bow. I guess I never saw that until now."
"I couldn't take this…"
"Do you have a token yet?"
"No, but-"
"Take it. I'm going to go out there and stand for what I believe in, and if I'm a martyr because of it, then…" He grinned slowly. "Everyone's going to watch this boy who should be shitting his pants do God's work. Daniel wasn't scared in the lion's den, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego weren't scared in the furnace, and I'm not going to be scared either. I'm not giving them the satisfaction."
Duff was speechless, but he put the necklace around his neck. "You amaze me, Knut," he said quietly.
"I think I amaze myself sometimes," Knut said quietly, laughing.
"So, you're not budging."
"Not even a little bit." Knut grinned, but he noticed Duff's eyes pooling up with tears. "Hey, don't cry."
"Sorry," Duff sniffled. "I just…"
"I know," Knut said, as they heard Antigonus calling for them to get going. "Hey Duff."
The older boy looked up, sniffling a little bit. "Hm?"
"If you forget anything I've ever told you, remember this. God is good. God forgives. If you could make it home… To my mother and best friend Ged…"
"Oh…" Duff blinked in surprise. It seemed that this kid was full of surprises. "Right."
Together, the tributes walked out to where their escort was waiting, and got on the elevator. They went up to the roof, where a hovercraft was waiting for them.
"This is where I say goodbye," Antigonus says. "And thank Augustus. A spitfire and a delusional little boy."
Duff growled, but Knut surprised him again by running over and hugging their escort tightly. "I forgive you," he said, before letting go and entering the hovercraft with Duff.
The tributes were loaded and buckled, before the doors closed. Knut's chest fluttered with nerves, but he did his best to shut them out. He closed his eyes and tried to collect his thoughts together well enough for a prayer. It was hard when they were flying around. All he could think of was, Help! Help! Help!
He felt a squeeze and noticed Duff taking his hand. Knut smiled a bit and squeezed it. His lips started to form words, asking for strength, and guidance. He was surprised when the 12 girl next to him took his other hand and squeezed it. The hovercraft was basically silent, besides the 11 girl chattering to her District partner and Kepler whimpering and clutching Henry's arm as he was afraid of heights. Everyone could hear Knut pray. He didn't care. He had a new sense of confidence. He wanted them to hear it.
When Knut glanced up, he noticed Malthe clasping his hands together, and Platinum burying his face in his knees, arms wrapped around them and hands clasped. Chico took Dill's hand, tears rolling down her cheeks. Rosalind's head was bowed as she tried to hold back tears. Drake stared at him, then stared at his own hands, but didn't act on it. Most of the other tributes were just confused, or tried to ignore it. Guinness leaned over his joined hands, sobbing quietly.
Knut prayed for strength. He prayed for forgiveness. He prayed for all of the tributes. He prayed for their oppressors. He prayed for the people that killed his father. He prayed for the Victor, if it would come to that, that whoever it is do the work of God. He prayed for the country. He prayed for his mother, for Duff's parents, for Chico's little brother, for Dill's siblings, for Platinum's parents, for Rosalind's brother, for Guinness's family, for Malthe's family and friends, for all of the people that would have to watch. Knut prayed the strongest, most fearless prayer he had ever prayed. He thanked God for the group of them, that had the courage to pray together.
They were interrupted when Capitolites came with syringes.
"What is this?" Duff asked, as the man roughly took his arm.
"It's a tracker," the man said, injecting it into his arm, causing Duff's face to contort in pain.
Knut gave up his arm without a fight, but refused to stop praying, even when the other tributes weren't with him. Chico didn't let go of his hand when her tracker was injected. Knut refused to let them stop him from praying.
The hovercraft landed just then.
"We're here," the Capitol aviator said. A lump formed in Knut's throat as they were all taken into a building, each of the rooms marked. They all had Peacekeeper escorts this time, close behind them. Not even Suki dared to fight them.
They had found Knut's room when the 14-year-old noticed Duff. He took off running before the Peacekeepers could stop him, and practically tackled Duff in a tight hug. Duff hugged back immediately, tears pouring out of his eyes.
"You're one of my best friends," Knut said quickly, crying as Duff held him tight and cried into his neck. "I love you."
"Thank you Knut-" Knut felt pain as the Peacekeepers' hands buried into his shoulders and ripped him away from Duff, letting out a sob. They dragged him away from Duff, who was escorted roughly the other way, sniffling. "I love you too!"
Knut wiped at his eyes, but couldn't help but smile as they shoved him forward into the room where his stylist was waiting for him.
Along with the T-shirt, light, athletic pants, and boots, Knut was given a jacket to wear with his District number on it. His stylist had no mercy in her eyes, no gentleness, no regret.
"It's about time the Districts get what they deserve," she said.
Knut stepped into the glass tube that would take him to the Arena. "I will never bow to you," he said.
"Then you will die."
Knut swallowed his tears, and let a huge grin spread across his tear-stained face.
"It is well with my soul."
The metal plate brought him up to the Arena.
~.~.
The sky was dark in the Arena. The moon was full and hung in the sky, which was decorated with stars. The tributes felt a breeze from behind, chilly and pricking at the back of their necks. They had been told to stay put for fear of being blown up, and they did so. They were in a grassy field, before them was a horn that glinted gold under the moon. It had plenty of supplies and weapons within.
Beyond the horn was a house, standing three stories tall. The house was old and dilapidated, but it was obvious that they were supposed to go inside.
Duff looked desperately for his District partner, but the duo had been kept separate for obvious reasons. Even Champagne, who was so bubbly, was quiet and deflated. She was right next to one of her allies, and wished that Drake's plate was just a bit closer to hers so she could hold his hand during the countdown.
Jessie found Rune, they were just five people apart, and they exchanged a glance and a nod. Charge and his District partner were on opposite sides, but they both figured it was for the best. Kepler was on his knees, examining the ground. Henry watched the clock, trying to distract his ally. It was hard as Henry was five people away from Kepler, but he had to keep trying.
The countdown continued, and the the tributes prepared for what was bound to be a time of misery and despair.
Elijah looked up at the moon and thought of Nate. He wanted to get home so badly, and would do whatever he could to get there. Next to him, Guinness was trembling and sobbing on his plate. On his other side, Suki's face was set, not betraying any emotion whatsoever.
Paulina was next to Platinum, and looked to be trying to make a plan as the timer counted down. The seconds continued to count down, and the tributes got more and more tense.
"Five… Four… Three… Two… One. Let the First annual Hunger Games begin!"
At first, nobody moved. It seemed nobody wanted to be the first to step off of their plates.
"Oh, damn it to hell!" Drake Fellington stepped off first, and after him came the others.
All of them ran to the horn, quickly gathering backpacks and as much as they could carry. Drake threw a couple punches to get the packs he wanted, one of them hitting Oliver and the other Kaya, but once he got what he wanted, he went to find his allies.
Suki searched for any kind of weapon she could use, just in case, when she sensed someone coming at her, full speed. Suki panicked, quickly grabbing a weapon and squeezing it, turning around and driving her weapon directly through Heidi's chest, who let out a shuddering gasp and collapsed to the ground.
Everyone froze, staring at the scene that had just happened. Suki, horrified at herself, quickly pulled the weapon out of the 12-year-old's chest and ran. Fights started to break out as the tributes realized that they had to fight to survive.
Seeing the horrors that were about to unfold, Henry took Kepler's arm and pulled the confused boy away, Rosalind quickly escaping after. Oliver and Crickette ran away together, and Dill also escaped the carnage unscathed, Malthe close behind him. Guinness buried his face in his hands, sobbing, but his instincts took over as he turned and ran, not knowing he was being followed closely by Elijah, who managed to get a backpack and a lantern.
Chico from 12 ended up being pursued by the girl from District 2. Paulina had a sword and was quick to demonstrate that she was not afraid to use it, hoping to win the attention of the strong alliance from 1 and 4. Chicory dodged her attacks, taking some cuts to her arms and hands defending herself. Chico knew her hope was gone when Paulina shoved her to the ground, quickly scuttling backwards as her arms burned. Paulina was about to strike her and end her life, but the impact didn't come. Chico gasped when she was pushed to the side, and saw the younger boy from 8 standing over her.
"Stop, please stop, can't you see that this is what they want?!" Knut put up his hands, weaponless, defenseless. Paulina didn't hesitate, she didn't even pause. She buried the weapon in his chest, causing Knut to cough and collapse.
Tears poured out of Chico's eyes as she forced herself to get up and run away from there, as fast as she possibly could.
Paulina hadn't even taken another breath before pain exploded in her lower back. When she looked down, she saw a spear poking out of her stomach. It was a very clean, very powerful, very intentional shot. A sob escaped her as she collapsed to her knees. Before her knees touched the ground, though, she felt a heavy boot strongly kick her in the back of the head, sending her down on her face as the spear was forcefully ripped out of her, causing more hot, burning pain through her entire body.
"Die, bitch!" The last thing the girl from 2 saw was Duff's face, red with anger and streaked with tears, before he stomped his foot into her jaw, causing painful, red agony, and the spear is pushed torturously through her chest, dragging out every second of pain as she screamed, begging for release.
While this was happening, Jessie and Rune met up in the horn, each of them grabbing a backpack and a weapon. On their way out, they noticed the 11 boy, a blank expression on his face as he wandered aimlessly towards the horn. They made an unspoken agreement, as Rune loaded an arrow and fired it at the boy's chest. It hit its target, and the girls from 9 and 10 quickly ran away together, not able to bear seeing what they've done.
The last battle to end was between Kaya from 6 and Charge from 5. The girl from 6 fearlessly jabbed a knife at Charge, who had a sword but was far too afraid to use it. He had learned how to use it, but had never dreamt of actually hurting someone, or worse, killing them. Instead, he kept defended, looking for an opportunity to get away. Kaya slashed at him a couple of times with her knife, hitting him enough to make gashes that bled. She saw that Charge wasn't intent on fighting and thought she might as well try to throw it. She wasn't afraid to do what she had to, she wanted to get back home and certainly didn't want to die. Her first throw missed, and before she could throw a second time, she was brought to the ground by Watt.
"Run!" they shouted after Charge.
"Watt no!" Charge shouted, horrified. He tried to make himself move, come to the defense of his District partner, but he was paralyzed. He couldn't make himself move, or do anything.
Kaya changed targets to the weaponless Watt, who fought back as best as they can.
"Go!" Watt called again, and Charge didn't think twice, heart pounding as he turned and ran to the house.
Watt didn't hold up too much longer against Kaya, who soon buried a knife in their chest, prematurely ending their life. The fight was noticed by the last remaining alliance, made up of Platinum and Champagne from 1 and Drake from 4.
"Let's get the 6 girl," Drake said, starting after her, but Champagne grabbed his arm.
"No!" her voice was shaking. "Please. Enough people have d-died…" she whimpered and Platinum gave her a sad look.
"This is the Hunger Games, we're going to have to kill sometimes," Drake said, as Kaya ran with a backpack and belt of knives.
"I know, but tomorrow!" Champagne sniffled. "Please Drake!"
Drake sighed but didn't pursue Kaya. As soon as she entered the house, the tributes heard the sounds of five cannons shoot off.
"Attention tributes," said a voice that sounded to be over a loudspeaker. It was Octavian Spencer, the Master of Ceremonies. "The cannon shots you just heard will continue to fire off through your time in the Games. Each cannon shot represents a tribute that has died. The tributes that have died will be announced by me over the loudspeaker every night at sunset. Good luck, and may the odds be in your favor."
"Five deaths." Drake said it so flatly, like it was just a normal occurrence. Champagne had to hold in a sob. She just couldn't look at it anymore.
"Please, let's just leave it at five for today," she begged desperately. She wasn't sure if Drake would listen, but he seemed to soften at least a little bit, sighing.
"Fine. But we have the horn and we're going to defend it until we get exactly what we want." Champagne nodded in agreement with that, but looked nervously at the Cornucopia. Drake could tell that she didn't want to go near the dead bodies, so he just let out another sigh.
"Platinum, help me get the rest of the supplies out. Blondie, just watch and make sure nobody tries to come get anything."
"Alright!" Champagne agreed quickly, clutching a spear from the horn tightly.
Platinum was more than a little unsettled having the hollow eyes of a 12-year-old staring up at him as he collected backpacks, but knew that Drake was a much better ally than enemy. He barely seemed phased by the carnage, bringing the backpacks back out and surveying their supplies. The District 1 tributes didn't have much input on what was most necessary to take with them. Platinum was just glad to have a sword, but the backpacks with extra food and flashlights were a big plus.
"Alright, I think that should do it," Drake said decidedly. He was going to take the lead of this alliance whether they liked it or not. He promised himself that once the two ditzes from One stopped being useful he'd dispose of them. Now that his life depended on it, he was ready to do that, no matter what he thought about Champagne before. Maybe they could have been together, but not here. No, not here.
"Ready to confront fate?" he asked the other two, as if they had a choice.
"Yeah," Platinum said quietly. Champagne stayed nestled close in between the two boys, swallowing hard and nodding a bit.
"Good. Let's go."
Together, the trio entered the house.
~.~.
A/N: Well, there's the "bloodbath." Not a real bloodbath because this is only the first Games, but I hope it was realistic enough for you all and you enjoyed reading it. And so starts the Games again, and so opens up sponsoring if you wanna give any tributes a chance to last longer (note: the Victor is not going to change, but the placements are flexible to shift with sponsor gifts).
R.I.P.
Heidi Rousin, District 11 Female, 12. Killed by Suki Tachibana, District 7.
Knut Passerini, District 8 Male, 14. Killed by Paulina Manson, District 2.
Paulina Manson, District 2 Female, 18. Killed by Duff Shoemaker, District 8.
Drago Cross, District 11 Male, 15. Killed by Rune Lachapelle, District 9.
Watt Fairbend, District 5 Female, 18. Killed by Kaya Toft, District 6.
Chapter Question: Which of the bloodbath deaths was the saddest? Which was the most surprising? Which of the five tributes will you miss the most?
