Chapter VIII,
Sadly, Erik was right about the nasal infections. Mahtab got them very often. Too much often, especially after cooler and finally cold weather arrived. Thankfully she wasn't feverish most of the time, but the constant sneezing and stuffed nose wasn't a pleasant thing to care about. Mahtab did not seem to mind it after a time, it seemed like she slowly got used to feeling a bit under the weather and did not cry or whine any more just because of a mild discomfort.
After her first Birthday she started to develop very quickly. Erik stepped in the nursery one day to the sight that Mahtab sat under the cradle and instantly stood up as she saw her father and greeted him with her usual baby language.
- Good morning there, little one! – Erik laughed and walked closer. – Well- well, how did Papa's little daughter manage to climb out of her bed, eh?
Mahtab hugged Erik's leg and giggled happily as he stroke the toddler's hair. She grew a lot of hair in these past months, it now covered all her head and slowly found its way down to her neck's length. At her birth she had light, almost white-ish blond hair and in this past year it darkened a bit, but still remained a middle blond. It wasn't too thick, and like her father's, it was hard to take care of. Erik hated his hair as well, it never stayed the way he wanted it to. Christine liked to brush her daughter's hair, even though the little girl wasn't too fond of it.
In a few days, she could stand steady without having to cling into something, but walking was yet a difficult process for her, though she could crawl fast on the floor for several weeks. The strange thing was that she did not really show any interest in the tricks she learned and her parents could not even figure out when or how she learned to sit up, to crawl or to stand up. Erik would call her lazy as she would make Erik carry her around and not to take steps herself. "A lazy little diva are you, eh?" – He would jokingly scold her.
But it all changed when she became 15 months old. It was February 1887, a damp and cold winter day. Erik put on his boots to leave the house to go to work when Mahtab approached him on her hands and knees, as usual.
- Oh, bye-bye there, Papa's little diva. Please be a good girl and listen to what Mama says. – Erik patted her tiny head and wanted to open the front door as the child stood up and took a few steps towards him. All alone, she walked to his feet and looked up. – Oh, you want to come with Papa? – He asked with surprise as he turned the baby to face the other direction and gently pushed her back to walk inside. – You stay with Mama.
- No.
That was the first meaningful word that left her lips. That high – pitched but so determined voice left no doubt in Erik that she absolutely knew what she was speaking about. She understood the whole matter they had discussed and gave her opinion on the subject. But just to be sure, Erik leaned close to the little skull – like face, looked into the mismatched eyes, and said:
- You stay here.
- No! – She repeated a bit louder than before.
- Yes, you do. – Erik straightened up to his full height and left the house with a small grin as he shut the door in front of Mahtab's non – existent nose. She was not yet clever and fast enough to follow her father.
"Just her father's daughter." – Erik thought as he smiled and shook his head.
Mahtab wasn't too happy about having to stay at home and her Papa left, but suddenly she forgot about her problems as she looked at the staircase leading to the next floor in the hall. She was upstairs a few times already with Erik, when he carried her up to the study or the music room, but she was never there all alone. She was a curious little girl, just as any babies and toddlers and she decided to find out what was upstairs. She walked to the first step and grabbed the edge of the next one with her tiny and bony hands, and she started to crawl up on her hands and knees. It was a harder task than anything she had done before, but it was oh, so exciting!
Christine had good sixth sense. She always felt if something was wrong or something terrible was to happen. As she took the first sip of her morning tea Erik made for her before leaving, she heard something. Or to be clear, she heard NOTHING. When you have a young child and you don't hear them making noise in their room, you can be sure they are up to something. Christine wasn't wrong when she thought she should be worried and check on her daughter – she reached the hall just in time to see Mahtab halfway upstairs, climbing up. She gasped in horror and ran to catch her.
- Mahtab dear! Oh, my God! – she hugged the toddler with trembling hands as she walked down with her. – How did you get here….? I knew that a young child walks everywhere they can but I thought this day comes only later… dear, you scared me. – she kissed the little girl's cold forehead but she wasn't in the mood for cuddling. Especially not now and not with Christine. It hurt Christine's feelings that Mahtab only wanted her kisses rarely. Her father could kiss her anytime he wanted to but Christine should have caught her in the right mood for it.
- No. – she shook her head and pointed upstairs.
- You want to go upstairs, dear? What do you want to do there, my angel? – Christine laughed. She saw it well that this isn't an ordinary child, and she could see some similarities between her and Erik, even in this young age. Christine could have sworn that Erik was just as stubborn and determined even back then, when he could barely count his fingers, but wanted to explore the whole world. Once he mentioned to her that he used to get injured a lot as a little boy when he was trying out something dangerous – Christine gasped in horror even for the mention of Erik walked along a balcony banister many times in his childhood, and once he broke his right wrist during the process. She was even more shocked by the fact that Erik told it to her laughing. For a moment, she saw Mahtab's tiny body falling down from the top of the stairs and she swallowed back some tears of worry. As she carried the child to the music room, she nervously wondered what to do to protect the child from this awful fate awaiting her with this attitude.
In the music room, thankfully, there was a thing that caught Mahtab's attention. Christine just placed her down to the floor and sat down beside her to teach her something new, but the tiny girl did not pay any more attention to her mother as she saw that awesome thing… she had seen her father sitting at it many times when he placed her down on the floor in a little basket when she was smaller or she crawled under it sometimes before: the piano. It was always so interesting to her that it produced some awesome noise. She stood up and staggered to the leg of the instrument and stretched just as she could to reach the keyboard, but her fingertips only could touch the edge of the keys.
- A musician… - Christine laughed and sat on the piano chair, picking Mahtab on her lap. – See, that's Papa's piano. Do you want to play it one day? – Christine asked playfully.
- Papa! – Mahtab exclaimed with happiness.
- Yes, Papa plays it very well. Do you want to say "Mama" as well?
- Papa. – Mahtab repeated and looked behind her to see if her father was there yet.
- Please dear, say Mama!
- Papa. – Mahtab nodded.
- Not Papa. – Christine sighed. – Mama…?
- Papa. – she then lost her interest about Christine and turned back to the piano, started hitting the keys with her fists. – Bang bang bang!
- Oh… right, dear. – Christine shook her head and sighed.
At the end of the unusually long, stressful and annoying day, Erik tiredly walked home from work when he noticed something. He wasn't alone. Someone was following him. He could hear the snow crunching under the feet of that said follower. He turned back to see who it was and his eyes met the thing that faithfully followed his path. It was a rather messy looking, fuzzy, brownish – gray colored male dog. It was rather big, its head reached up to Erik's waist level. It was bony, most likely starving, and Erik could have sworn it was full of fleas. As Erik stopped, it stopped as well, and sat down behind Erik and looked up at him with plea and adoration in its eyes.
- What do you want of Erik? He has nothing for you. – He told the animal and started walking again. The thing still was in his heels. He stopped, and so did the dog, again. – Go away. – Erik turned back to see if the thing is still behind him or not. It was. He did some more attempts to chase or scare it away, but the dog seemed like it picked him out as his master, and would not leave.
Erik liked animals in general, yet he had a strange relationship with them. In his childhood they had animals around the house, some chickens, two geese, a cow, a horse and a dog to guard the house. And a cat that did not really belong to anyone, but it appeared around the house many times to catch mice and his poor unhappy mother would give it some milk regularly. He was ashamed to admit that he sometimes was mean to those animals in his young years, mostly to get his mother's attention. Mother was always so busy… she did not even want to look at him or talk to him. He asked her about something and she would say "Leave me alone, I have to feed the chickens.", or something along these lines. He sometimes felt jealous of those chickens, that horse, the dog… they got much more attention from his mother than he ever dreamed. He saw his mother kissing the little chicks and he was so mad… he HATED them. They got kisses from mother… and he never got ONE. He made a slingshot and shot the chickens when his mother did not see him, or so he thought. He was caught and he got what he deserved for it – mother literally broke a wooden spoon while teaching him his manners and he wasn't able to sit for days.
His favorite animal was the cat back then. It was so independent, free spirit and clever. He did not accept anyone as a friend- just the ones he trusted. Erik would wait for him to return and talk to him, pet him and try to get his trust. The cat liked him more than it did like mother, even though it was her that gave the cat food. Food wasn't everything- a dog likes you for food, but a cat doesn't. Erik thought himself very similar to a cat many times.
Later, he learned to defeat his evil thoughts about animals. He found out they were just as helpless as a child was, and they gave lots of love to a person if treated kindly. He tried at least to be kind to animals in his whole adult life, but he never wanted a pet of his own. Too much responsibility, too much trouble and they would not leave him work. If he did not have a dog under the Opera in his complete solitude to have at least SOME companion, why would he have a dog now when he at least has a family to love? He does not have time and energy for a dog. He is too old for that, with a young toddler and such a big house… and work to do… He felt so tired, so old at that moment as he was 100 years old. In the last decade or so his joints were in quite a pain sometimes, especially in the winter, even if he tried to ignore it as much as he could. It will be a big enough challenge to raise a child like this.
As he was wondering about his relationship towards animals, and his health lately and stood there, he noticed the dog sat closer and closer to him, in the end it reached his gloved hand with its nose. It sniffed him several times, then sat down again. Erik sighed as he watched the poor neglected creature. It looked rather unhappy and unloved.
- Are you hungry? – He asked with compassion. The dog, as if he understood what Erik asked, swallowed and licked its mouth.
Erik patted the dog's head as he sighed again and shrugged agreeably.
- Come. – He gestured to the dog to follow him, and now, with delight, he realized it was still walking behind him just as if it was leashed. It did not get away from him, not even to search for smells or to chase sparrows. – You are going to need a name. – Erik added after some minutes as they were walking. – You seem to be following me everywhere and you are dark colored – what about Shadow? – the dog did not seem to mind its new name so Erik stated. – Not protesting is accepting. So your name is Shadow. I am Erik.
When they reached the porch of Erik's home, Erik told the dog to sit down. To his surprise it did obey him. It seemed like Shadow knew and understood orders, so he was trained. Did he escape from a home, did he get lost, or was he abandoned? He thought he would never find it out what has happened to the poor creature, but he was happy he did not have to teach him everything. It would have been a tiring and annoying task. When he entered the house and Christine wanted to run to him to talk about something, Erik, unlike his usual habit, stopped her mid step.
- I am sorry to interrupt my dear wife, but I have to feed the dog. He is starving.
- Dog? – Christine asked wonderingly. – What dog?
- That one. – Erik pointed to Shadow, who still sat on the porch without a move.
- Oh… do you want to keep it?
- He wanted to keep me. – Erik laughed and put some sausages in front of Shadow, but to his surprise the dog did not start to eat, just stared at him. – What's wrong? You may eat it… it's yours. – To that the dog gobbled the whole food up in a blink of his eyes. – You only eat if you are permitted to do so? Hmmmm… clever dog. I think we will be friends if you don't go on my nerves. Well, I give you some water and a blanket here. You will stay here. – the dog was wagging his tail and showed much pleasure as Erik gave him water and a blanket to lay on. He put it on the porch, patted the dog's head then walked inside.
- Why don't you let him sleep inside? – Christine asked.
- A dog? A filthy dog in Erik's house? No, Christine, the dog stays outside. It is his place.
- What if he leaves?
- His decision. – Erik shrugged.
- It is cold outside.
- Not on the porch, there he has a corner to hide and a blanket. He will be fine. By the way he is wandering on the street for weeks. If it did not cause him any trouble, he is used to cold weather. The dog is for guarding the house. His place is outside. End of argument. Now what Erik's wife wanted to tell him?
- You… look like you are not feeling well. – Christine stated worriedly as she stepped closer.
- Erik is just tired. He had a lousy day today.
- I will try to make you feel better. – Christine smiled and gently stroke Erik's bony shoulder sympathetically.
- You always do, my dear. – Erik smiled too, at last. – Where is my baby girl?
- In the nursery… I actually wanted to talk about her, Erik… she is getting dangerous to herself.
- What? Why?
- Today she tried to climb upstairs. I caught her on the stairs.
- Uh oh… well, Erik should have expected this to happen. I knew she will do this, I just did not think it will happen so soon. But don't worry, Erik is taking care of the situation right now.
- Right now? What are you planning to do?
- I put safety gates on the top and the bottom of the stairs so she won't be able to climb up or down without us until she learns to use the stairs safely all by herself.
- That is a very good idea Erik dear, but you are both tired and you must be hungry… it can wait.
- No, Christine, my daughter's safety cannot wait. Erik is not hungry anyway – he will be done in a few hours.
Erik was all done with the gates by the time morning came. He did not sleep all night, and only had time to take a bath and change his clothes and he left for work with Shadow in his heels again. He was too tired to protest – the dog may follow him anywhere he wanted to. As he arrived to the construction and started to talk to the people there he realized Shadow wasn't with him anymore. He was delighted for a time that he finally got rid of him. Maybe he found someone else to pester.
Mahtab was really disappointed to find out she wasn1t able to climb upstairs or open the thing that closed the way up. But she did not give up the fight – she did the only thing she found suitable for this awful situation – cry from the top of her lungs. Christine arrived soon after hearing Mahtab's cries of displeasure and took her upstairs. She was so happy to be able to enter the music room again.
- Mama teaches you to say Mama. – Christine smiled and placed Mahtab on the sofa in the music room and sat in front of her on a chair, but Mahtab did not really pay attention to her. She was looking at the piano and reached out for it. – Please Mahtab, say Mama. – Christine pleaded.
- Papa. – Mahtab said smiling and pointing towards the piano again.
- Mama?
- Papa.
- Papa. All right. – Christine sighed and took Mahtab to the piano. She slammed her tiny fists against the keys again, making some awful disharmony.
When Erik arrived home he was surprised to find the dog at the porch again. It seemed like Shadow just accompanied him to work and returned home just after. He did not really mind it any more, just quickly fed the dog and gave him fresh water to drink. He could barely keep his eyes open. But as he slowly reached the stairs he heard Mahtab's laughter from the music room and decided to kiss the little girl good night efore he finally goes to sleep. He opened the door of music room and saw Christine and Mahtab on the floor, clapping together. Christine was teaching her some rhythm patterns.
- Papa! – Mahtab screamed with joy as she realized Erik's presence in the room.
- Oh… did you say "Papa"? – Erik smiled as he knelt down to hug the small girl as she stood up and walked towards Erik.
- She says it all the time. – Christine laughed. – And bangs the piano with her fists.
- Is she interested?
- Yes she is. Very much so, I could barely put her to sleep in the afternoon.
- Oh – ho, little musical creature, are you? – Erik gently kissed the toddler's forehead.
- Papa. – she smiled.
- Yes, yes dear. Here is Papa and he loves you. And now we go to sleep. It is late already.
- Maybe you can put her to bed. – Christine laughed. – She wanted you all day.
Mahtab pointed to the piano as Erik lifted her up to take her to the nursery and let out a small disappointed cry.
- No, no dear, Papa is too tired for that right now. Tomorrow, I promise. – he yawned. – Tomorrow.
As soon as he put Mahtab to bed and he returned to their bedroom he wanted to rest a little bit before changing to nightwear, but as he closed his eyes he instantly fell asleep. Christine removed his cravat, shoes and pocket watch for him and placed a gentle kiss on his cold forehead. She stroke his hair and lay beside him to sleep.
She forgot to set the alarm before going to bed, and as Erik was so tired, against his usual habit he did not wake up early in the morning. When he finally opened his eyes, he realized he was in half an hour delay. He had to get dressed and leave that instant as he will be late from work. He put his shoes on in absolute hurry and was running downstairs as quickly as he could – forgetting that he installed a safety gate to the bottom of the stairs and it was still closed.
Christine lifted her head up to the sound of a loud thud and then some half angrily, half plaintively muttered cusswords. She ran to the stairs worriedly and saw Erik slowly staggering to his feet and painfully stroking his knees and side.
-Are you all right? Did you get injured?
- Yes, I am and no I did not. – He stated shortly. – I am sorry my dear, I am in hurry. – He walked outside as fast as he could. Christine ran down to look out of the window to see if Erik could still walk. He was so crazy he would leave for work even with a broken bone. He was walking with a drag so she could see he hit himself, but other than that he looked healthy. Shadow was following him to work – just as the day before.
Erik walked home the same way as he left for work – but he did not seem to mind it. He was used to some level of pain, as he was beaten a lot in his life. Mahtab waited for him in front of the stairs.
- Papa! Bang, bang! – she moved her fists as she was hitting the piano keyboard.
- Yes, you may play with Papa now. – He picked her up in his arms and walked up to the music room. He sat down to the piano with Mahtab on his lap and as the girl started hitting the keys with her fists, he gently caught her hand. – No, no dear, we don't hit the piano. It hurts for the piano if you hit it like this. We pet it. – Erik gently moved Mahtab's tiny fingers on the keys and showed her how the instrument sounded when one wasn't just randomly slammed it. The tiny girl was in awe of the sound and maybe for the first time in her life, she listened to real music.
Erik proudly smiled at his daughter on his lap – maybe not much time has to pass until she plays the first easy piano pieces…
