Shadow's funeral took place in the backyard, with the whole family attending. Everyone was crying. Shadow was a good family dog, and Erik had to admit, he also missed him dearly, even though he always stated he loved cats much more than dogs, and Monsieur LeChat was his more preferred companion since they owned a cat as well. Erik dug the faithful family member's grave under a huge tree that will give him some shadow in hot summer days, so he will have a good place to sleep forever. The funeral was nearly as if they were burying a human being, and when Erik adjusted the dirt on the grave, he murmured softly:
- Sleep well, old boy. We loved you.
Mahtab and he carved a mark for the grave which said:
"R.I.P. Shadow, the best and most loving dog ever. Lived more than 8 years. We miss you."
Everyone in the house was noticeably a lot quieter and more gloomy than usual. Erik was missing his old friend who would lay under his feet while he read a book or the newspaper, and was indescribably happy by a stroke of Erik's bony hand, Noel missed his horsey friend, Mahtab missed her huge furry pal who would always lick sugar off of her hands, and Flo did not have a companion to listen to his violin playing any more. Shadow would sometimes sing with him. He loved that and called Shadow a clever boy for it. Christine just sat on the sofa, looking outside of the window and wept. Erik comfortingly rubbed her shoulders to support her emotionally, and tried to talk about more pleasant things, but the wife noticed that his eyes were full of tears as well. Florian tried to occupy and comfort himself with the presence of the musician cat, as he often referred to M. Jean – Pierre. He would pet and kiss him, and the cat was purring for him, giving him the impression he was playing some kind of music again. He would carry him in his arms from room to room, calling him "friend" or "fellow" mostly, serving him milk or cream as a treat. The cat grew to love Flo a lot, so the cat now had two favorite people in the family. The father and the boy.
Mahtab was feeling uneasy, especially in the evenings. Even though she was sleeping in the same room with the two boys, she felt lonely and needed some comfort. She was thinking a lot about someone falling asleep and never waking up again. It was the first time she met death in person. She heard that Geneviéve, her Grandma died some time ago, but as she never met her, she did not miss her at all. She hugged her blanket close to herself and closed her eyes, but anytime she wanted to fall asleep, she was afraid she will never wake up again. Shadow looked like if he was just sleeping at first, but after she had to find out that it was way more than that. Mama and Papa are sleeping as well, everyone else is sleeping but her. Papa is old. He says so. Old people and animals die. This is the way it should be. What if Papa never wakes up again?
She jumped out of bed, ran through the dark hall to her parents' bedroom, and opened the door. Erik was snoring a bit, just as always. Fine, at least he isn't sleeping too deep. She walked to the footboard of the huge double Louis Philippe bed and climbed through it to arrive right on Erik's feet. She did not consider her father was taller than her and she did not think Papa's feet actually did reach that far, she wanted to land on an empty spot. Erik woke up with a groan, feeling the child's weight, but he already saw those mismatched eyes getting closer and closer as Mahtab crawled to him in bed.
- What is wrong? – Erik yawned.
- I am afraid.
- Of what?
- Passing away. – She admitted.
- You are so young yet. – Erik stroke her hair. – You don't have to be afraid of it. Children like you rarely die.
- Not exactly me. – She went on. – Rather older people here.
- So, me? – Erik looked at her worriedly.
Mahtab only nodded slowly then crawled closer to her father, hugging him. Erik started massaging her back to make her feel better. He knew well that Mahtab's fear actually had a reason. He was an old man, and he knew that he wasn't immortal either. He was lucky enough to survive the scarlet fever. The girl buried her face deep in his sleep shirt, and Erik was rubbing her ear with his thumb.
- May I sleep with you and Mama? – Mahtab's muffled voice came.
Even though Erik thought Mahtab was already too old for that, and he did not even allow the children to sleep between him and Christine in their toddlerhood, he did not have the heart to send a worrying and uneasy child back to the other end of the hall, so he quietly agreed.
- But only for tonight.
He covered her up with his blanket and hugged her close to himself, then took a quick glance at his pocket watch on the night table.
- Sleep now, Mahtab, it is only 3 in the morning.
The girl lay her head on Erik's chest and fell asleep, feeling safe with Papa.
The next morning found them waking up together. Christine was happy to find her daughter between her and Erik, and happily kissed her forehead to greet her. Mahtab was happy to sleep with her parents and Erik liked the girl's presence as well, yet he whispered in Christine's ear not to encourage her to sleep with them too much, Later, when everyone did her morning routine and while Erik was making breakfast, Mahtab walked to Christine, who was busy doing her hair and asked:
- Mama… is it true that if someone dies, they go to Heaven?
- Yes dear, depending if they were good or bad person.
- Mama…did Shadow go to Heaven?
- He was a good boy. – Christine nodded sadly. She did not want to tell the poor little girl that animals, according to religion, have no souls. She, to be honest, did not fully agree with this statement anyways.
She finished doing her hair, and took the girl's hand to walk in the dining room. Erik was busy making pancakes. Mahtab was happy about the smell of the delicious breakfast, but the matters of afterlife still were bothering her.
- Is Grandpa and Grandma in Heaven too?
- Yes dear, I am sure, on both sides. – Christine lifted her on her lap.
- I honestly do hope Geneviéve rots in Hell. – Erik's angry voice could be heard from the kitchen.
- Erik! – Christine gasped in horror.
- Sorry, couldn't help it. – Erik sighed.
- Why do you wish her to rot in Hell, Papa? – Mahtab jumped off of Christine's lap and walked to the kitchen behind Erik's back.
- Nothing, Mahtab. – Erik replied mechanically. – We did not… like each other too much.
- And bad people go to Hell?
- The Bible says so. – Erik nodded. – But stop bothering me because I end up putting soap on your pancake instead of butter.
They both laughed, and finally Mahtab seemed to calm down a bit about death issues. The other two children stormed into the dining room jumping on their seats, and Noel, just as always, started slapping his plate in excitement. Compared to being skinny, he could eat a whole horse with his appetite, just as his father. Since he made peace with himself, Erik did eat a lot more than he used to, yet he did not gain any weight.
- I want six! No, seven! – He clapped.
- How do you ask nicely, Noel? – Christine warned him about manners.
- I would like to want seven. – He corrected himself, if not the best way, but still.
- All right. – Erik arrived with the pancakes. – You get five at first, then you will tell me if you need more. – He patted his head.
When breakfast was served, Mahtab took a glance at her plate, but after she again turned to Christine.
- Mama… did Grandpa love animals as well?
- Yes, dear, he did, a lot. – Christine smiled.
- Did you have a cat like M LeChat? – Flo had put a whole pancake in his mouth earlier, but his question came to his mind so abruptly he did not have time to chew and swallow it, so his inquiry turned out rather hard to understand, but Christine was well – trained about Flo's greediness, so she heard it right.
- Florian, gentleman don't speak with their mouth stuffed full. – Erik turned to him.
- Sorry. – Flo apologized properly.
- We did not have a cat, Erik dear. – Christine replied, looking at her cute chubby son, who was now occupied by eating another sweet treat.
- Why did you not have a cat? – Noel asked.
- Because we were travelling a lot, and we were poor with my Papa. We did not have much to eat, and having an animal with us would have been selfish. We could not have given the treat they need.
- Where did you travel a lot? – Mahtab put down her knife in sudden interest.
- Papa was a street violinist and we would travel together to earn money. I sang.
- Like Mozart on his concert tours? – She asked.
- Kind of, but I never sang for royalties. – Christine laughed.
After some hours, Mahtab was still thinking about the words of Christine. Travelling with Papa, playing music… it sounded something she really wanted to try, and besides, Papa once promised it when she was small, but they returned home. When she wanted to run away it was really frightening but if Papa was with her, it should go well. She ran to the study where Erik was working on some kind of music and she tapped his shoulder to ask for attention.
- What the Devil? - Erik gasped and dropped his pen. Realizing it was Mahtab, he turned around and asked: - What is it, Mahtab?
- Papa, was it good to travel a lot?
- It had its great moments. – He nodded.
- Did you see many beautiful buildings?
- Yes.
- Do you want to see them again?
- I do see them whenever I want to. I have books about each worthy building.
- And in real life?
- What? – He leaned closer to find out if his ear deceived him or not.
- With me. – She pointed at herself.
- Oh, Mahtab, how do you think up such a thing?
- I wish to travel with you. All around Europe to see the Colosseum and all.
- Ha! And might as well a pie in the sky?
- Pie? I want that too.
- Mahtab, a pie in the sky is just a saying, it means I am not going to do that.
- Why?
- Because I am an old man, Mahtab, I don't wish to drag myself all over again from country to country. I am tired and mostly in pain, I do not want to sleep in inns or tents, getting through forests and mountains without opportunity to bathe or use the bathroom in peace and I have no urge to leave my comfortable house behind for months, only for the sake of showing you some buildings you can see in a postcard anytime.
- Seeing it in real life shall be a lot of fun. I would like to see it with you.
- Oh… well, I will think about that. – Erik nodded, wanting to end the conversation about this subject for s time.
He knew what Mahtab felt, as he was just as curious about wonders of the world, but honestly, he did not feel like repeating any of his travels. In his age, people would most likely prefer to stay at home and lead a lazy and comfortable life. He did not like to admit the fact, but taking care of the house in itself started to be a challenge with the renovation and the children. Who needs a journey on top of these?
That child, however, did not give up things easily. She had learned during the years of her existence that if Papa says "No" to something, it can still be turned to a "Yes" within time, especially if she talks to Mama about it. Mama can make Papa change his mind, so she just went and asked Christine about the idea of a travel with Papa.
- Oh dear, would you leave us here with the boys?
- You might as well come. – Mahtab smiled. – All the better.
- Oh, I thought you would just go with Papa and would not even miss us. – Christine teased.
- I think you all should come. Flo could bring his violin and he played music. Like Grandpa.
- Now that is a very sweet idea, Mahtab dear. – Christine sighed dreamily. – Did you ask Papa about this yet?
- Yes, but he doesn't want to. Talk to him, please! – Mahtab pleaded.
- Well… I will, don't worry. He will say yes eventually.
Erik wasn't too happy about the fact that the little miss talked to her mother about her nonsense idea. He received the news with a sigh and a clear no, adding "Did I turn crazy, you think?" Christine thought it would be a wiser idea not to force the issue any further, but she did not give up convincing him later. Maybe he will say yes once if she finds him in a better mood.
That evening Mahtab went to the master bedroom directly after taking a bath to sleep with her parents. Christine would have allowed her to get in the bed, and started telling her a story, but when Erik arrived to the bedroom after putting the boys in bed, finding Mahtab laying in his own bed, he shook his head and told her to go sleep with her brothers. It has happened two more times, and later Erik accompanied her back in her room and sat on the side of her bed till she fell asleep. He softly recited a poem to calm her down. He caressed her face one last time and kissed her cheek, then he walked back to the bedroom. Despite his habit, he locked the bedroom door.
- Why did you do that? – Christine asked suspiciously.
- Because I don't want Mahtab to jump on my feet at quarter to three again.
- You are cruel.
- She is too old for this babying.
- She is a child, Erik, and needs support.
- She has to learn to deal with her problems. Christine, there will be a time when she stays alone with them.
- You might be right, but I find it cruel nonetheless.
- Sometimes you need to be strict. – Erik lay down in bed and hugged Christine close to himself and kissed her neck.
Christine could no longer stay angry with Erik when he did that. They hugged close to each other and nearly fell asleep when Erik suddenly whispered something in Christine's ear to which she blushed bright red and giggled nervously for some seconds.
- Are you sure…? – She asked half happily, half unsure.
- Yes… please… allow Erik to… do it quickly. Will you? He would so love to. – Erik's voice was so pleading and Christine was actually happy about Erik wanted to do it by himself, so she allowed him to do what he needed to.
Mahtab woke up again in the middle of the night again. For a time, she just tried to fall asleep again, thinking of Papa's soothing voice, but she could no longer do it. She needed Papa's presence. She got up and walked to the bedroom door, but when she wanted to press the doorknob, she heard something VERY strange.
It sounded like Papa was in pain or something. He moaned, and both Mama and he were breathing on a strange way. She got alarmed upon hearing this, and wanted to open the door to see what was happening, but it was closed. This only made her even more nervous. She was standing at the door, with eyes wide open, biting her lips. Is Papa dying? Why did he cry out? Why Mama is breathing like that? Only when Mama started to laugh, and it was followed by Papa's happy "Oh, Christine…" she started to calm down. She pressed her ear against the wood of the door to hear if they needed help or not, but she could only hear some happy chit-chat being whispered. They confessed love to each other and everything seemed to be normal. Erik stated it was the best "lovemaking" of his life.
What the Hell is lovemaking?
She wanted to ask Papa and Mama, but she was afraid she will be scolded by Erik for the attempt to enter the bedroom when he clearly stated she wasn't allowed to, so she rather chose not to. But maybe Sophie can answer!
When Yvette arrived for a visit with Sophie and small Philippe, and Christine and Yvette were busy babbling to the baby, Mahtab took Sophie's hand and led her to Papa's study, where they won't be bothered for a time.
- I need to ask something. – Mahtab whispered.
- What? - Sophie inquired curiously.
- Do you know what lovemaking is?
- Lovemaking is when you make love.
- Yes, but how?
- Well, Mama told me that a man and a woman do it when they love each other and this is how Philippe was born.
- But wasn't Philippe sent by God?
- Mama did not say that.
- Papa said that people pray to God to get a child.
- Maybe, but then why would they kiss?
- So kissing makes babies?
- I am not sure.
- I kiss Flo as well, but we don't have babies. – Mahtab said with confusion.
- I think it is because you need to kiss in bed.
- Really?
- That is what I heard, but it wasn't told by Mama.
- Maybe that is true because they were in bed.
- Maybe you will have a baby brother than? – Sophie laughed, and clapped.
- I am not sure.
- Would you like to have a baby? – Sophie asked.
- I think yes. – Mahtab nodded and smiled. – I like children in general and Flo and Noel are mostly cute.
They started playing together and Mahtab forgot about the whole issue for a time. After some days it returned her mind though, so she walked to Christine and asked.
- Mama, do you want another family member?
- Why do you ask that? – Christine turned to her child with a sudden interest.
- Because I thought you were planning it with Papa.
- Oh! We did not yet talk about it, but… you might be right!
Christine assumed Mahtab was talking about a dog. Shadow passed away and all of them missed him. What were they waiting for? She is right! She was going to get a puppy for the family!
- Fear not, my dear little one. – Christine kissed Mahtab on the cheek. – Mama is going to get one for you all.
- So you start to pray for God?
- No, I go and buy one.
- Buy? – Mahtab asked with a jaw drop.
- Yes, they are being sold as well, you don't always find one on the streets.
- On the streets…? – She whispered.
God… maybe she wasn't even sent by God, but just found on the streets?
Christine just put on a hat and hurried away, leaving Mahtab there, totally confused, wondering about the circumstances of her birth.
