BAM!
"Ow! Why do you always punch me like that!" Jiraiya complained as he cradled his jaw, which was definitely broken. All thanks to the redhead storming before him. He can't even ask her to heal him with her freaky powers, since she was way too pissed off to even listen to him. Honestly, it wasn't even his fault. He was just enjoying the way her ass sways from left to right as she walks, when was it a crime to stare after a girl's ass?
A twitch appeared over Alice's forehead and she clenched her fist and retorted "Why do you always stare at my ass?"
His lips morphed in a lecherous grin and he said "Isn't it obvious?"
SLAM!
This punch made him fly ten metres away and crash into a nearby tree, breaking it's tree trunk, and bruising his ribs. She glared at him and threatened him "Watch that attitude of yours, or I will turn you into a hideous toad and then feed you to snakes."
Jiraiya gulped as he scooted away from her, mumbling "Jeez, what got your panties in a twist?"
He froze when a heavy wave of killer intent washed over him, and he turned his head slowly –and dramatically- towards Alice, who was now cracking her knuckles.
"You never learn, do you?" She said in a deathly tone and stalked towards Jiraiya, who cowered away from her. She slammed her fist down on earth, and the ground beneath her cracked.
Jiraiya blanched as he stumbled away from her. "Oh Kami, I pissed off a mini-Tsunade. What am I going to do now?!" He cried out to heavens as he ran away from Alice, who was giving him the chase.
And when she did caught up to him, well you can imagine the result now, can't you?
"You sure you're not an Uzumaki?" Jiraiya said as he cradled the huge bump on his head, all thanks to Alice. "Coz you sure act like one."
"No I'm not." She said surely, because if she had any more relatives, then someone would've told her so. Right? If not, then at least Aunt Petunia would've sent her to some other relative –if she had had any- since neither she nor her big-fat pig-of-a-husband had ever wanted to look after her anyway. So yeah, that rules out the chances of having any relatives other than the Durseleys. "Besides, I just acted like any other woman would if they were in my place." She said with a huff.
"Not every woman hits with monster strength to a man who was just appreciating their beauty." Jiraiya muttered under his breath in a low tone, but apparently, not too low since she heard him all too clearly.
A twitch appeared over her head and she said in a low threatening undertone "Care to repeat that?"
Jiraiya squeaked out and shook his head little too quickly "Nothing!"
She smiled smugly and said "That's what I thought."
They had rented a room in a nearby inn or the night, since turns out she had actually punched Jiraiya a little harder than she had originally thought. So now, here they were, spending the while evening and the rest of the night in a dingy little inn on the roadside, waiting for Jiraiya's wounds to recover. She could have healed his wounds with her magic, but she was feeling a bit vengeful today. What? The pervert so deserves it, and you know it. Besides, it's he'd die or anything with his wounds. She didn't hit him that hard.
"Ow!" Jiraiya groaned as he placed an ice-pack over the huge bump on his head.
Er… maybe she did hit him a bit harder than she had imagined. Che, he'll live.
"Alright, I'm going to retire for the night." She said as she got up from the corner of the bed she had been sitting on. However, before moving to the door, she gave him a stern look and said "Don't call me before the morning," She then paused and added on as an after-thought. "-unless you're dying or being maimed." Saying this, she slammed the door shut and made her way to the room next to this one, which happened to be her room for night.
As soon as she got into the room and locked the door behind her, the façade of cheerful nonchalance she had been putting on dropped immediately as her shoulders drooped down as if she has the weight of the world on her shoulders (maybe she did, and still does). Her emerald green eyes, which once used to sparkle with warmth and mischief was now dull, and made her face look more aged. She sighed with weariness as she made her way towards the bed and sat down on it. It was going to be a long night.
She was used to bizzare and abnormal situations that she always somehow ends up in, but this is ridiculous! Getting dragged into another dimension –because of a blasted toad- where people can use some supernatural power akin to magic and where animals can talk and everyone suspected you to be some fancy, kick-ass, one of the last survivors of an almost extinct Clan –Merlin, it's like one of the Muggle stories she had read one, "Alice In Wonderland" where she was being portrayed as Alice and this weird World is Wonderland. You'd think that after fighting and winning a War against a deranged snake-man, she'd get to live a somewhat normal life. But No! what she instead got was an Adventure.
An Adventure she didn't want.
Actually, she'd have been more than happy to explore this world and have a kick-ass Adventure here, if only she was assured that her Godson was alright and wasn't worried about her like the little worrier he was, and that she somehow had a chance to get back to her own world. But after hearing from Jiraiya and Gamakichi's theories about how disastrous it'd be to open a portal with natural energy for a second time, she had a feeling it was almost impossible to open the portal from this Dimension.
To be truthful, she was worried about Teddy. Would he be worried about her? Wrong question, of course he was! Teddy may be cheerful and carefree like normal eleven year olds, but he was such a worrier. He knew Alice's tendency to fall into bizarre situations, and he knew that she always, always somehow comes back home afterwards, but it doesn't stop him from worrying. Who wouldn't, after all, for the one of the last and only member of their family? He didn't want to lose his Godmother, just like how she didn't want to lose her Godson. Remus trusted her with his son, she can't fail now. She'd have to find out some way to get back home, and give her Godson a big hug for worrying so much for her. She'd somehow have to at least send a message back home to tell him that she was safe, or else he will sic Hermione and Ron on her case, and knowing them, they'd panic and cause mayhem in the Wizarding World in the guise of finding her.
Wait, if he tells Hermione, then there's also a high possibility that the smart witch would somehow contact with her, and then try her best to find a way to bring her home. She wasn't called the Brightest Witch of her age for nothing. Hm….. maybe she was worrying for naught. Hermione will surely find a way, coz there are very few things Hermione can't do.
But what if she can't?
Ugh….. she needs a back-up plan. Or maybe, what she needs is a solid plan, because depending on Hermione to get her out of this Dimension would only happen once she somehows gets in contact with her friends… which doesn't seem to happen anytime soon.
So yeah, a plan would be better than worrying about her current situation.
But what could she do from here? She can't go back the way she can –from what she understood from the jargon that Toad was telling her- and she can't overly depend on Hermione to get her out of this mess.
She pulled her red hair in frustration. Ugh! Thinking is so boring, and harder than just summoning Death and breaking havoc on poor, unsuspecting prisoners of Azkaban!
She almost jolted in shock. Death. Of course! Why the fuck hadn't she thought of that before?!
She can just summon Death and the Bastard would send her back to London. Easy as a pie!
Grinning happily, she quickly pulled out the elder wand and stood up. She remembered from Death's lectures the last time she had attempted to summon him, that one needs a blood sacrifice to summon him. So, with a flick of her wand, a cut appeared over her left palm as blood dripped from it. She coated her fingers with her blood, not even flinching at the injury and pulled off her robes and undershirt so that she was only in her bra. Taking a deep breath, she made the sign of the Deathly Hallows on her chest, just above the part of skin under which her heart was beating. The mark of the Deathly hallows has to be drawn with blood over the heart, because the heart contains the magical core, as well as the essence of life. Figures that Death can only be summoned at the cost of a life. Not that she had to worry about losing her life, since she was the Master of Death, and hence, it's not like she'll die anyway.
Casting a silencing charm around the room, she took a deep breath and chanted "I summon thee, O Spirit of Death!"
Nothing.
Huh. It usually works. Why wasn't it working?
Shrugging, she tried again. Maybe this time It'll work?
"Death, I summon thee!" She said in a loud and clear tone.
Still nothing.
What. The. Hell.
A cold feeling gripped her heart and she gritted her teeth in anger. Why wasn't he answering her? Was this because of the prank she had pulled on him the last time? But she had already apologized for that! "Death! Answer me! I need your help! Please!"
She paused and waiting for something –anything- to happen. But nothing happened.
She clenched her fists in anger, ignoring the blood that dripped down from her left fist as tears of frustration rolled down her cheeks. "Death! You bastard! Show your face to me or I swear I'll punch you to the seven hells and won't forgive you even if you let me make Tom Riddle dance wearing a pink tutu!"
Still Nothing.
Screaming in anger, she punched the nearest wall, and I cracked under the strain of her overflowing magic. Her eyes burned emerald and her red hair flew around her like flames of an unrestrained fire. Oh no, she was not angry. She was darn pissed.
She let out an angry scream, and her magic lashed out, causing havoc in the little room, breaking everything in her sight.
She laid on the floor, feeling exhausted and numb. She had destroyed everything in the room in her anger, and exhausted her magic reserves. Her tears has dried up long ago, and her red hair was sprawled around her like a blanket. She was so, so tired and numb. She wanted to hide away in some remote corner and never come out.
The feeling of disappointment, and fear that she'll never be able to go home gripped her heart. Coming her was a mistake. She hadn't even wanted to come here in the first place! That blasted Amphibian! She should've killed him on the spot! Who the fuck cares if he was somehow related to Neville's Toad? He was the reason she was in this mess!
She wanted to go home. She wanted to hug Teddy and shower him in affections. She had wanted to spend these three weeks with him, knowing that he'd be going to Hogwarts in three weeks. After that, she won't be able to see him until Christmas break, and that way too far from now. She wanted to go back on her Auror duty and terrorize the new recruits. She wanted to crash Kingsley's Stiff and Formal Meetings and see Neville and Luna's amused smiles and Hermione's exasperated and angry rants. She wanted to have dinner Nights with Weasleys, and have a drunk evening with the twins.
She wanted to go home.
But she was stuck in this world for God knows how long, while Death was MIA and her friends and family have no idea where she was.
Can this situation get any worse?
She woke up with the sounds of birds chirruping, and someone banging on the door. She groaned and rubbed her stiff neck as she opened her eyes, and was almost surprised when she saw the horrible state of the room. The furniture was in pieces, the mirror was shattered, and the bed was broken. Huh, she really had caused utter destruction. Looks like she'll need to take anger management Classes, again.
Sighing, she waved her hand absently and everything was repaired and the room looked like the way it was before she had destroyed everything. Good. If she hadn't cleaned up her mess, she had no doubt that Jiraiya would have had her head.
There was banging from the door again and she scowled as she groggily got up and made her way to the door. She absently draped her robes over her upper body and then unlocked it with a wandless "Alohomora" and opened it, revealing Jiraiya with his fist up and was about to bang on the door once again.
As soon as he saw her, his brow furrowed and he teased her, with an undertone of concern. "You look horrible." Is it her imagination or did his eyes flicker over the cut on her left palm?
"No shit Sherlock." She deadpanned.
He tilted his head in confusion, not understanding her reference. "What?" He asked, confusedly. Figures, he won't understand the references from Earth.
"Nothing to worry your Ugly head over." She said with a dismissive wave of her hand, and he cried out indignantly-
"HEY!"
She ignored his comment and asked "Why were you banging on my door anyways? Haven't ever heard of knocking?"
He sniffed as he folded his arms and said haughtily "Knocking is for wimps."
"And banging is for morons." She quipped dryly, without missing a beat.
He glared at her good-naturally, while the corner of her lips quirked up in a small smile. Jiraiya may be a pervert, but the man sure knows how to lighten anyone's mood. She guess he was overall a good person, if one ignores his perverseness. He rolled his eyes and said "Anyway, I came here to tell you that we'll have to depart as soon as we can if we want to reach Konoha by this evening."
"What's the hurry?" she asked with a raised brow.
He grimaced and answered "I got a message from my Sensei yesterday, stating some rather problematic situation in which he needs my help. We need to get back as soon as possible." Huh, looks like something big happened. Is it really safe to stay in Konoha if there's some sort of danger there?
…..Who was she kidding? There is no place in this World or another where she can be "safe". Ron used to say that Danger was her Middle name, and she won't deny it.
She nodded at his explanation. "Alright. Meet you in twenty minutes?" She asked.
"Make it ten." He said sternly.
"Fifteen." She bargained with a stern look, because he was already pushing up her time limit. What girl do you know of who can get ready in such less time?
He opened his mouth to argue, but she just cracked her knuckles and gave him a scathing look. "A-Alright." He said hastily. "Fifteen Minutes and no more."
"Good." She said as she slammed the door on his face and quickly rushed into the adjoining bathroom and stripped out of her clothes. She had only fifteen minutes to get ready, after all.
"What are you doing in my bathroom! Wait, answer that later. For now, GET OUT!"
Merlin, not only Jiraiya was a damn pervert, but was also utterly shameless and ridiculously stubborn too. And apparently, something is actually wrong with his ear to brain passage since he doesn't understand the meaning of 'No', and 'Get out'
"Don't you understand you damn pervert?! I said, Get out, NOW!" Alice screeched as she bonked his head, making him crash into the bathroom's door, breaking it in the process. Jiraiya groaned in pain as he tried to sit up, nursing the bump on his head where she had punched him.
"Goddammit Woman!" He exclaimed with a groan "Why do you have to hit so hard?!"
"Why do have to be such a pervert and enter the bathroom while I am bathing?!" She said as a twitch appeared over her forehead and she clenched her fist again. Her dark red hair was dripping water, and the bathing robe clung to her body, flaunting her curves. Jiraiya had to admit though, it was a sight to behold, even if she looked so damn angry.
"I told you, it was an accident!" Jiraiya said as he groaned in pain. "I thought you've gotten ready by now and came here to get you!"
She snorted and said in an accusing tone "I find that very hard to believe, you pervert! You didn't have to enter the bathroom to check if I'm ready or not!"
"I just thought it's be a good idea to remind you to hurry up. Seeing you naked under shower was just a bonus." He said with a perverted giggle making her eye twitch.
"Get. Out." She seethed and with a wave of her hand, Jiraiya was thrown outside the bathroom, and the destroyed bathroom door got repaired in an instant with her magic, along with a strong repelling charm that'll keep Jiraiya out for the time being.
While she got ready in the bathroom, plotting to take revenge for Jiraiya's perverted actions, Jiraiya gaped at the bathroom door with a disbelieving expression on his face. The woman had thrown him –One of the Legendary Sannin- out of the Bathroom with just a wave of her hand! Not many people can do that!
Uzumaki or not, this woman was clearly something. She may not have large chakra reserves, but she clearly had something that helps her performing strange Jutsus. He'll just have to find out what it is.
After all, if Jiraiya was good at anything, then it was Information Gathering.
