He was dressed and out the door before sunrise.
Thankfully he hadn't lost his badge, he didn't feel like a police officer much these days though, he was a desk jockey, it seriously sucked but he knew he needed to keep his nose clean. It was only a matter of time before the brass had better things to do instead of watching his ass.
Voight had made it clear as day, he wouldn't be working a case in the field, he wouldn't sit in on interrogations or question witnesses. He was tasked with chasing down paper trails and researching their suspects. Occasionally he would be allowed to make phone calls and speak with people who may have been in contact with a suspect or person of interest.
It was mostly paperwork and that was more than just a little boring but it was better than nothing.
It was awkward as hell in the bullpen, it felt as if everyone was walking on eggshells in his presence, he was the eight hundred pound gorilla in the room. When he first came back he had been standoffish, he rejected their hugs and handshakes. He didn't want to be touched, he didn't want anyone in his face, nor did he want anyone coming at him from behind.
His second day back he arrived before everyone else and moved his desk into a corner of the bullpen making it impossible for someone to come up behind him. He was quieter now, his bubbly personality a thing of the past, he always wanted to be the center of attention now he hoped to blend in.
He wanted to go unnoticed.
More than anything though he wanted people to stop asking him how he was doing, he didn't want to talk about what had gone on during his four months in prison. He wanted to put it all behind him.
He settled in at his desk and fired up his laptop he was currently scouring the dark web for links to their case, he had discovered some pretty horrific shit along the way but none of it could be linked to their case.
He had sent off what he had found to the right departments and refocused his efforts on their case. He had about a dozen properties that were purported to be linked to one of their suspects. He needed to gather all the intel he could find on each property, making a folder for each one that would assist the team in the event of a raid.
He started with the properties within a fifty mile radius, and would slowly expand the radius to include the other properties.
It wasn't his favorite thing to do but at least it was actual police work, he felt like a cop again. He'd give his left nut to actually take part in one of the raids, but he knew it wasn't gonna happen anytime soon.
Voight ambled upstairs, he had grown used to Adam being at his desk before everyone else, "Adam." He nodded his head in acknowledgment.
"Boss." Adam briefly looked up from his laptop.
"How's it going?" Hank asked him. He was watching the kid closely, he felt a tremendous amount of guilt over the length of time Adam had spent in jail. He had handled the entire mess poorly, it never should've happened.
Antonio had wanted to turn himself in immediately after Adam had been arrested, but Voight wouldn't allow him to do so, he needed to get Antonio's head right first. He had found Antonio gacked out of his mind, and lit into him. He was furious that Antonio had fallen off the wagon, especially since Adam had been arrested.
It had gotten ugly and Antonio threw a punch which Hank dodged and countered with one of his own, knocking Antonio on his ass. Hank stood over him and made it clear that the only place Antonio was going was a rehab facility and that it wasn't up for discussion.
All of this went down the night Kelton was killed.
Hank refused to sell Antonio out so when IA came to question him about Kelton's death, Voight didn't say much and refused to tell them where he had been and who he was with. It had gotten pretty nasty and he knew they were looking at him for the murder. He didn't budge despite everyone telling him to talk.
He had a clear conscience, and just days after Kelton's funeral an arrest was made, a banger that felt he had been dicked over by the mayor elect had taken him out. They soon learned that their esteemed mayor was as dirty as the day was long.
Once Antonio completed his stay in rehab, Hank did as he promised and stood by Antonio as he confessed to his crime. Much to their dismay it didn't result in Adam's release, it was another two weeks before he was finally set released.
"It's going." Adam replied, he held up the three files he had completed, "these are done. I've got blueprints, neighborhood stats, some photos of the interior but I can't be sure of how current they are." He handed them to his boss.
"Good work."
Adam folded his arms across his chest, "Any chance I can tag along if this results in a raid?" He bounced on his toes a bit, nervous energy coursing through his veins.
Hank furrowed his brow, "No. Not yet." He shook his head, "You need more time."
Adam felt dejected, "More time? I've been back to work for over a month, I'm dying here."
"You flinch when someone gets too close, you're jumpy. You're not ready, Adam." Hank explained, "You give any more thought to talking to someone?"
He had the card in his wallet, he'd even called the number a couple of times but he never let ring more than once or twice. It was embarrassing reaching out for help, he knew that whatever he told the doctor would stay between him and the doctor but he also knew that doctor had the power to take his badge and he couldn't risk it.
Halstead had broached the subject with him and he appreciated it but told him he was good, he knew Jay had similar demons but that was where the similarities ended. It seemed everyone wanted to chime in, Hailey had approached him and Jay, she was quick to tell him to let it go that he was stubborn and Jay was wasting his breath.
Adam noticed the looks passed between the two, their relationship seemed to no longer be just a working one. He wasn't surprised she always seemed to care more about Jay than she cared about him, their brief relationship had been a mistake from the get go. He had no hard feelings towards Hailey but he made it clear that they were merely coworkers at this point.
Kevin did whatever he could to show his support and Adam appreciated it. Kevin seemed to know when Adam wanted to be left alone and when he needed a friend. He shown up at Adam's apartment with a six pack, they didn't talk about what had happened, but Adam knew Kevin would listen if he needed to talk about it.
He didn't have many visitors in prison and that was the way he wanted it, Voight visited despite Adam's wishes and truthfully he expected nothing less than that, but never in a million years did he expect Kim to show up.
He had been a dick to her when he was seeing Haley, he would regret how he handled that for the rest of his life. He should've been the one to tell her, she never should've walked in on them and he definitely shouldn't have cracked a joke about it either.
Needless to say when she walked in the room he felt his stomach drop, he couldn't do it. He couldn't sit behind the pane of glass and look her in the eye. He immediately got up and called for the guard and asked to be brought back to his cell.
The first time he saw her after his release was hard.
Hank had called them all in, no one knew what was going on but knew it had to be big to be called in on their day off.
Adam hated it but knew this was the best way to go, he could get it over with it. His stomach filled with knots and dread. He waited in Hank's office until they all arrived, he waited for Hank to knock on the closed door before stepping out.
"Hey." Adam waved awkwardly.
"It's good to see you Ruz." Jay extended his hand.
"Good to see you too." Adam shook his hand, "it's good to see all of you." He forced a smile and shook everyone's hand, he stood in a very defensive posture and it was clear to all that he needed his personal space.
They all milled about for a bit, talking amongst themselves,when Kim finally worked up the courage she approached him. She placed her hand on his upper arm, "It's okay, Adam." She smiled a bit, "I understand."
Adam felt relief wash over him, "Thank you."
They never mentioned it again.
"I don't need to talk to anyone, boss. What's the point?" Adam asked, "it won't change what happened. I've got no one to blame but myself, I went against your orders. Multiple times." He went back to his desk, "I made my bed now I've got to lay in it." The frustration was rolling off him in waves.
"Adam..." Hank approached him, "You thought you were doing what was right. No shame in that, I played a hand in all of this. I never should've let it get to that point..."
"Shoulda...woulda..coulda.." Adam plopped down in his chair, "Can we just let it go? I don't want to talk about it."
"Kid..." Hank placed his hands on Adam's desk, "You need to."
"Do I?" Adam opened a file, "Like you talked about Al's death? Or when Lindsay talked about her shit?"
Hank could hear voices begin to float upstairs, now was not the time to get into it, "I'll drop it for now."
"I appreciate it."
"Fuck it's cold as hell out there." Kevin reached the landing and stomped his feet on the rug to knock off the accumulated slush from his boots, "So cold. Colder than a witch's tit."
Kim rolled her eyes at the comment, "Good morning." She pushed past him and made her way to her desk.
Upton and Halstead arrived within the hour, they worked on paperwork and checked in with their CI's before turning their attention to Hank.
"Alright, everyone focused? Ready to get to it?" He watched as they nodded their heads and put whatever they'd been working on to the side, giving Hank their undivided attention.
Adam pushed back from his desk and handed them each a folder containing copies of what he had found, "Some light reading to start your day." He forced a smile as he dished them out.
"Ruzek has discovered a list of properties that are linked to our person of interest" Hank started, he waited as Adam taped the blueprints of two buildings on the white board, "The ones posted are most likely to be our targets. We can't rule any of them out though, we start with these two and then work our way through the list."
"Boss...that's like..." Halstead scanned the list quickly, "a dozen buildings. All over the city. Seems a bit much."
"Agreed. Jay's right. One of these places...is out of our jurisdiction." Hailey pointed, "We are down two officers. We are stretched thin as it, I say we go through the list and whittle it down to the properties that fit the bill of a typical stash house. Work smarter, not harder."
Kim cocked her head to the side and clucked her tongue against the roof of her mouth, "I don't know. These guys wanna lay low, I think we need to do our due diligence with each property. The least likely it is to be a stash house, makes it even more likely to be a stash house." She didn't appreciate the comment regarding being down two, she knew Hailey didn't have malicious intent but it was still a shitty thing to say. "I don't think cutting corners is the way to go. We need to look into all of the listed properties. Regardless of location."
Voight could see the conversation veering off track and knew he needed to get them focused on the task at hand.
"All valid points. We don't have much to go on at this point, I think we need to do this the old fashioned way, we start with these two.." he rapped his knuckle against the white board "...and work our way down. In the meantime we hope shit doesn't hit the fan. Halstead and Upton, you take the buildings with an even numbered address, Atwater you take the odd."
"Am I flying solo?" Kevin eyed him suspiciously, "Not that I won't enjoy the quiet..."
"Platt is sending a uniform to ride with you." Voight explained, "Head downstairs, I'm sure your partner is anxiously awaiting your arrival." He smirked a bit, it was written all over Kevin's face, he wasn't thrilled at the idea of a patrol officer as his co pilot.
"Fan-fucking-tastic" Kevin grabbed his coat off the back of his chair.
"Dude, you need to remember your roots." Halstead busted his balls. "You started in patrol, it's time to give back, let the uni see how the other side lives." He wore a shit eating grin as he continued to rib Kevin.
Atwater turned to face him, "I remember my roots all to well. The last thing I want is to have an eager beaver ridin' shotgun." He grimaced, "I'll make the best of it though."
"I wouldn't expect anything else from you." Halstead countered with a grin.
"Burgess, my office." Hank ordered.
"What's up?" Kim asked as she closed the door to Voight's office, "Am I sitting this one out"
Hank leaned back in his chair, "No." he knew he what he was doing was a bit of a risk but he had to do it. He could see Ruzek was struggling under the weight of it all, he knew prison hadn't been easy on him and he had been roughed up numerous times. He also knew that Burgess was the only one Ruzek would listen to, she was able to settle him with just a look or touch.
He knew things had gotten messy between them, far messier than he would have liked and ordinarily he wouldn't pull such a move but he was desperate. Someone needed to get through to Adam, to break down the walls he had built around himself otherwise it would eat him alive.
"So what am I doing?" Kim asked growing a bit impatient. She wanted in on the action.
"Taking a road trip." Hank told her, he handed her the paperwork on the property that Halstead had mentioned, the one out of their jurisdiction. "This one is unlikely to be involved, it's in the middle of nowhere, a few hours outside of the the city. It's too far away from the action, but we need to check it out regardless. I guess you could say we'd be doing our due diligence"
"Okay." Kim looked it over, "Whose riding shotgun?"
"Ruzek."
Kim looked up, "Seriously? You think he's ready?"
"You have reservations?" If she had any reservations at all he wouldn't send Ruzek with her, he trusted her judgement.
"No. God no, Ruzek is good police. It's just you've got him riding a desk. What's changed?" Kim never doubted Adam's ability as an officer and she knew beyond a shadow of doubt that he had her back. Always.
"Nothing really. You know as well as I do that you'll find jack shit at this house. There's no way it's an active stash house but we need to check it out nonetheless. You take Ruzek with you. It's a long drive, you shoot the shit. Get him talking. He'll open up to you, Kim. He needs to talk to someone, he's struggling."
"I don't know. A lot has changed between us."
Hank sucked his teeth, "Maybe, but my gut says otherwise." He leaned forward in his seat, "Kim, if you can't do this, or you don't want to do it. Say something. I think Adam needs you, he needs help and I think you're the only one he will listen to."
Kim took a deep breath and held it for a moment before answering him, "Alright. I'm in."
