"So, these Friends of Red Jenny. They are another gang…" Cassandra's voice dripped disapproval and Maria's mouth throbbed where some bastard had gotten a lucky shot in. She held ice to her lip and moved to take it away and answer the Seeker, but her new friend answered first.
"Pft, no. Just people bein' people. Watchin' out for each other."
"And you're this Jenny?" Cassandra asked.
"No. She's Sera. Sera. My tongue wants to whistle on the start. Sera. But it has to stay still or the r is a d. Sera. Seda. Seda…" Cole broke into a rambling train of thought, pacing anxiously in the empty chasm between her and Varric.
She hadn't looked at Varric when he held out the ice wrapped up neatly in a clean dish towel. In fact, if Cassandra hadn't impatiently ripped it from Varric's hand and thrust it against her face, Maria wasn't sure she would have taken his assistance. As it was, she watched him suspiciously from the corner of her eye as he tapped at his phone, spoke softly to the AI in his ear, glared up at covered security cameras.
She couldn't look directly at him, but she couldn't ignore him either. It was like trying to ignore gravity.
"What the fuck is…" The elf took a reflexive step from Cole who wrung his hands nervously. "Creepy over there better watch his…"
"He isn't creepy." Maria cut in immediately, defensively, angling her body firmly between the elf and Cole.
"How'd he know my name, yeah?" Sera challenged.
"She's loud. Light. Colors. Whirlwind. Drowning out the whispers and the whistles and…" Cole paused, eyes flicking between Varric and Maria again as quickly as pinball bouncing around an arcade machine. "This is wrong."
"You're tellin' me." Sera muttered darkly, glaring suspiciously at Cole. "It's like his mouth doesn't even know what he's sayin'!"
"Come here kid." Varric called gently. "I could use some help. Think you can reach those wires for me?"
"What are you doing, Varric?" Cassandra rounded on the other dwarf, granting Maria a small reprieve.
"Erasing the security footage." Varric answered calmly. "Unless you think it's a great idea to have this all over the evening news. In which case…"
"And if there is a backup in the cloud?" Cassandra demanded.
"Seeker, of course there's a backup in the cloud. Or there was, at any rate. Bianca's already on it."
"This is highly illegal and…"
Maria pressed the heel of her hand hard against her forehead. She was starting to get a migraine. Without preamble, Sera took the distraction offered by Varric and Cassandra's incessant bickering to lean against the bar where Maria sat. "So…. you're it, yeah? The Herald of Andraste?"
"I'm not." Maria argued, meeting the elf's eyes. "People keep calling me that but I'm just the unluckiest bitch in Thedas."
"Weird thing, you." Sera reclined like a lanky, mismatched cat. There was something both predatory and playful in her posture. Bea would like this one, Maria was certain. The elf was just her type, all legs with a wicked edge. "The Jenny in Ostwick can't stop talkin' bout you."
"I don't know the Jenny in Ostwick or any of their friends." Maria snapped impatiently.
"That isn't true, is it?" Sera grinned. "My friends like you. Odd, considerin' your boyfriend is a flaming piece of shit who knocks you around."
And there it was, the odd, hollow sucker punch she'd been waiting for. She blinked once, twice, let it settle. Let the nausea roll in her stomach. Then, she let the towel she was holding and the ice within it fall to the bar with the same hollow sound. She shoved herself off the bar stool and fixed her eyes, unseeing, on the door. "They don't know me."
Nobody did, really, except Cole and Bea. It was so fucking easy for everyone else to sit and point, to whisper, to...
"Know more than you think!" Sera, obviously, wasn't content to let her walk away. She was shouting so loud Sera and Varric both looked away from their own argument over the dubious ethics of making sure the so-called Herald didn't get arrested. "Know Friends think you don't eat enough, 'specially lately. And you got kicked out of three card games! Too good, right? Winnin' too much and the house can't have that."
"It was four." Maria glared over her shoulder. "Your friends missed one. Seeker, I want to go back to the hotel."
"If…" Cassandra began, but Sera interrupted her brightly.
"My friends say not like you to be greedy. You know when to stop, make sure they let you come back, yeah?" Sera smirked. "But, friends say you hid the shortfalls in the racket. Hid 'em as long as you could, huh? He take it from your cut in the end? Bastard."
"What?" Cassandra asked, looking from Sera to Maria and back again. "What in the Maker's name…"
"Shit." Varric swore, his voice cut through her like a blade. "The businesses the Carta took protection money from couldn't pay, so you paid for them and hid it from Dwyka."
Until that last time. Until she couldn't and Dwyka took it out of both her cut and her flesh, then sent her to Haven to die.
"Sweet baby Andraste." Varric said into the heavy silence. His voice echoed, couldn't look at him. "Princess…"
"Andraste and the Maker don't do enough." Sera rolled her eyes, interrupting Maria before she could tell Varric not to call her that, to never call her that ever again. "Go to chantry, pray about your sins, ask forgiveness, go home hungry, isn't that it? The chant doesn't keep your belly full or your clothes clean. Doesn't keep the kids from eatin' the lead paint off the walls. The sisters up there in their big hats with their holier-than-thou tits."
"Excuse me?" Cassandra sputtered indignantly, but Maria could feel Sera's keen eyes on her shoulder blades.
"You though… different, you. Tough, too. Carta's gotta be tough, right? You know what it's like down here with the little people, the people who don't care 'bout witches and templars and chantry. You gotta want it to end too, right? Get rid of the crack in the sky, little people get back to work, I get back to takin' out rich tits who won't fix the plumbing in their shitty apartments." Sera scratched her chin with the butt of her rifle nonchalantly. "I can bring friends, you know they'll help."
"What good are these friends?" Cassandra asked pointedly.
In Ostwick, Dwyka bought a load of smack from some shady Tevinter assholes. Bea took one look at it and told him to throw it in the harbor, you couldn't trust anything from the north. In return, Maria took a black eye that made Bea spit fire for weeks, but she'd been right about the drugs. As soon as junkies started dropping, it was obvious who was to blame. The shit was cut with something either potent or poison, it didn't matter really. The end effect was the same. Dwyka didn't care at first. He still got paid.
Until Red Jenny traced the source of the bad drugs. Then, everything that could go wrong went wrong. Cops got tipped to their most lucrative drop points, one of their lyrium shipments sunk into the harbor, a bunch of their dealers got arrested, and finally Maria herself got picked up in a bar brawl she was still ninety percent sure was a setup and was out of commission for weeks because her paperwork got lost. While she languished, Dwyka was suddenly faced with all the shit Maria herself usually did. Protection money went unclaimed, smugglers went unpaid, and Dwyka finally had to get his ass in gear and figure out who was out to get him. They only ever found out one name, not a real one, but an appropriately dramatic one. Red Jenny.
She, or he, wasn't satisfied until Dwyka personally paid the funeral expenses of every last person and the rest of the drugs sunk into the harbor exactly where Bea and Maria wanted them in the first place.
"Ask your Herald what happened in Ostwick. She knows." Sera was smirking and Maria wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry. She'd had a damn good laugh at Dwyka while she'd been locked up watching his ill-gotten empire fall apart. It had been the highlight of her year.
Still, she'd always wondered… "Did your friends set me up for that brawl?"
Sera had the presence of mind to look slightly abashed. "Like a mini-vacay, right?"
It almost had been, just like this was. But all things must end. "She should come with us, Seeker. If you don't take her, she's gonna end up in jail and so am I for this… shit show."
Cassandra looked like she would argue, but instead she let her shoulders slump in defeat and shook her head. "As you wish. Come then."
Sera whooped and dodged underneath the bar, pulling bags out from under it and chattering wildly while Cassandra surveyed her with a mixture of distrust and aggravation.
"We don't deserve you, Maria Cadash."
She flinched at Varric's voice closer than she expected it to be, he'd moved to her side almost as silently as Cole could. She tucked her hands into the pockets in her coat with her ill-gotten weapon immediately, ducked her head. He was right. They didn't deserve to be saddled with her and the trainwreck that was her life.
"Yeah, well, I'm what you've got. I guess."
"I didn't… I didn't mean it whatever way you just took it." Varric reached out like he may touch her, his hand faltering in the loaded space between them and falling uselessly back to his side.
It had been easy, before. That night, in the snow, his book like a living thing in her hands and his rakish smile while he spun stories out of thin air like Solas summoned magic.
She thought he was going to kiss her that night. She'd wanted him to in a way she hadn't wanted to be kissed in a long, long time. It would have been a good kiss, the kind they wrote poetry about, the kind that people applauded in movies.
This wasn't a movie. This wasn't poetry. This was blood and monsters. She didn't deserve a fairy tale kiss in the starlight. That was for other women, women with clean hands and unblemished souls.
"No." Cole whispered in horror. "No, no, no, no. You're both wrong. How… how are you both so wrong?"
"We're going." Cassandra snapped, ending the fraught moment. Maria turned blindly towards the sound of her voice, unable to meet Varric's eyes as she left him behind.
"Someone! Help me!"
Maria reached for a gun she didn't have while she whirled to stare at the long, dark hallway. Someone was screaming far away, begging for help, but nobody was coming. Nobody was there except for her.
She took a step forward. Something terrible rumbled in the distance, a laugh that made all the hair on her skin stand up straight. She kept walking, placed one hand on the door to shove it open with all her might and…
"You afraid, Cadash?" It was Dwyka's voice, Dwyka's breath on her neck, his arm sliding around her waist and pulling her back flush to his chest, but it wasn't Dwyka.
It was something worse. She knew it even as Dwyka's hand covered her mouth so she couldn't scream. She watched it grow claws, listened to Dwyka's laugh become a dark, twisted thing.
"You should be." The demon laughed and dug talons into her mouth and she could taste her own blood, she was drowning in it, stuck, pinned…
"Herald?"
Maria opened her eyes, staring out into too bright morning light. Outside the car window she saw people, movement, Inquisition soldiers. She took a deep, shuddering breath and brought her hand up to her forehead.
It took them one long ass train ride to get to Val Royeaux, but it took them multiple trains and two days to get back to Haven due to the civil war in Orlais flaring back up again. Maria seemed to spend most of that time on the phone, mostly with Josephine, Leliana, and Cullen. A few times with Dwyka when she could hide away.
She didn't know how long she'd been asleep with her face pressed against the tinted SUV window, but there was an embarrassing amount of drool on it and Harding looked a bit worried.
"Sorry, let you sleep as long as we could."
"Are you well?" Solas examined her face critically. "You do not appear more rested."
"My nanna used to say dwarves didn't dream. Back when we lived in the dirt." Maria yawned and ran her fingers through her hair. "Fair trade, I'm beginning to think. I've had some horrible dreams lately."
When she slept at all. Sometimes, her head hurt so damn much she couldn't fall asleep at all. Sometimes, she was convinced she'd find demons on her eyelids.
Solas frowned and turned stiffly in his seat. Cassandra turned the key in the ignition and inclined her head to the door. "Are you ready?"
As she'd ever be. In all honesty, Haven was welcome after Val Royeaux. There was something welcoming about the snow capped mountains around them, the people who were all starting to look familiar. Maria nodded and reached for the door, popping it open and swinging her short legs out. From the corner of her eye, she saw the other SUV pulling to a stop. Blackwall was roaring with laughter, pounding his big fist against the steering wheel while Sera mimed a gigantic pair of breasts. Maria smiled, shook her head. Blackwall caught her eye and winked as he turned the car off. The back door was already opening and Cole stumbled out, followed on the other side by Varric.
She looked away quickly and shoved her hands in her pockets. She turned to head up to the chantry, where she knew Josephine, Leliana, and Cullen were waiting. The rebel witches wanted to meet her, talk to her. She impressed them with her little spat with the Lord Seeker. Meanwhile, the Lord Seeker himself seemed to be quickly losing political support, and that support was skillfully being moved behind the Inquisition thanks to Josephine's careful diplomacy. Cullen said soon, they'd have no choice but to sit down at the bargaining table too.
But it was Leliana she was anxious to see. Leliana had an answer about how Varric knew so much about her past, but she'd asked to tell her in person after assuring her, repeatedly, that there was no immediate danger, that she did not believe anything beyond the police report and trial records had been compromised.
Leliana didn't ask what was so important beyond those. Maria wasn't quite sure if it was because the woman already knew or if it was because Leliana didn't want to push the boundaries of the fragile trust they seemed to be establishing.
"I've got to go see…" Maria began, looking up at Solas, but before she took one step…
"Look what the cat dragged in."
Maria's head whipped back up and she stared, shocked, into eyes a perfect match for her own. Bea was at the top of the pedestrian steps and she leaned carelessly against one snow-covered railing. She was wearing a jacket so tight Maria wouldn't be shocked if the zipper simply gave up and flopped the whole way back down, a dress with a hemline that was drawing rather scandalized looks from a flock of Chantry sisters, and black boots that went up over her knees. Her chocolate curls fell elegantly over one shoulder and her makeup, as always, was impeccable.
She was, all at once, the best damn thing and worst thing Maria could see. "Bea?"
Instead of answering, Bea flew down the steps and tossed her arms around Maria's neck. It was automatic to wrap arms around her back and tug her closer, to inhale the sweet scent of vanilla and amber hanging in the air around her, the scent instantly enough to transport her home.
"What are you doing here?" Maria finally asked, the words muffled in Bea's curls. Bea pulled away just enough to critically sweep her gaze over her with a tight frown.
"I'm here to make sure you're eating. Real food," Bea clarified when Maria opened her mouth. "Not twinkies and instant ramen."
"Bea this is dangerous. I don't know if you noticed the giant hole of death over there, but…"
"Of course it's dangerous. And of course you're right in the middle of it. You're bleedin' cursed and Nanna is rolling in her grave right now, you watch. If I'm not here to get you to bolt at the first chance…"
"How did you get here?" Maria could shake her. Only Bea would think it was a good idea to traipse, by herself, through a war zone and…
"My good looks." Bea winked and inclined her head up the stairs. "Well, and a very large qunari."
Maria followed Bea's gaze up the steps and couldn't help the startled laugh that slipped from her mouth. A massive Qunari was making his way down the steps with an easy, deceptively casual gait. He had an eyepatch on, but beyond that, the three piece suit he wore belonged in the most boring of offices. Except for the garish tie, plaidweave of all things.
"Bull!" She stepped out of Bea's embrace and craned her neck to look up at the Iron Bull, his massive horns scraping the sky as he walked. "I can't believe you're here."
"I'd say I can't believe you managed to get into this mess, Boss." Bull grumbled mildly with a spark of wicked humor in his voice. "But you always knew how to find the best kind of trouble."
"Who is this?" Cassandra looked utterly bewildered. For the first time in days, Maria's grin felt genuine.
"Seeker, this is my lawyer and the man who taught me to fight." Maria punched Bull's arm lightly. "The Iron fucking Bull."
xx
Varric: I've got several nasty emails from the Inquisition's head of intelligence. She knows you were digging and she's extremely unhappy about it. The kind of unhappy that usually leads to murder.
Bianca: I'm sure. They wouldn't want those records getting out now, would they?
Varric: Stop it. Stop meddling. Leave Maria Cadash alone.
Bianca: I'm not scared of an upstart religious organization, Varric.
Varric: Do it for me then. Because I'm fucking asking you and how many things do I actually ask you for?
Varric: There's nothing going on between me and Cadash, and if there was, it wouldn't be your damn business anyway.
Bianca: I'm just trying to protect you.
Varric: Bullshit.
Varric: If you don't stop, I won't beg Nightingale on your behalf. You can clean up your own damn mess when she goes after you.
Bianca: I just need you to go home safe. That's all.
Bianca: I'm doing this for you. For us.
Varric may have had more unanswered emails than anyone he knew, but he made it a point to always respond to text messages as soon as he got them, at least from people he liked. Varric didn't leave people on read.
But he hadn't responded to Bianca, days after returning to Haven, days after he'd been dressed down by Nightingale. He didn't know if it was because he was still furious, which he certainly was, or if it was because that one sentence was enough to break him. Bianca claiming to be working for him. For them.
It was the same reason she gave him when she married Bogdan because he had the money to fund Rogue Tech in those early days when Bianca was little more than a penniless genius and he was a smooth-talking starving author. They needed funding. Bogdan wanted a wife who could glitter in social settings. Bianca's family didn't have cash, but they had the right pedigree.
Varric, meanwhile, didn't have the right name or the appropriate amount of zeroes in his bank account. Not then. And now…
Well, Bianca's husband had claim to half her share in their company, a devil's bargain if he ever saw one. Leaving him meant Bianca opened herself up to losing half of what she worked for her entire life, and she'd never risk that. Varric knew where he stood in the scheme of things.
There was no them. There was his one-sided pining and Bianca's protests that she'd leave Bodgan when the time was right. Until then, all he had were empty words and the sick guilt that lingered after every secret encounter in anonymous hotel rooms, the hook-ups that grew less and less frequent as Varric realized they were both getting too old for this shit.
As Varric watched his best friend end up with someone who actually wanted to be with her, no matter the cost. Fenris, prickly ass that he was, didn't hesitate to stay by Hawke's side when the world blew up in their face.
"You've led me to strange places. Engaged in a hopeless battle to protect witches of all people."
Aveline and Isabela dragged another ugly ass desk in front of the door. Hawke's fingers were remarkably steady while she wrapped a torn strip of cloth around a burn on Sunshine's arm. Merrill was laying down spells to act as wards as fast as she could and Varric stood shoulder to shoulder with Choir Boy dividing out ammunition. All around them, he could hear screaming. Crying. People were dying of injuries they had no hope of treating.
This was the end. The end of the world.
"Oh I'm sure I'll take you to stranger ones." Hawke claimed with a sunny, lighthearted optimism that sounded only slightly forced. She patted Bethany's cheek lightly and turned to Fenris, wiping blood stained palms on her ruined red dress.
"Tempting offer." Fenris smirked, but the expression didn't hold up for very long. Instead, he crossed to Hawke's side, rifle loosely gripped in his right hand, left rising up to cup Hawke's cheek. "In case I do not get the chance to say this… meeting you was the most important thing that has ever happened to me."
Hawke opened her mouth, closed it, opened it again. Her voice came out unnaturally high this time. "Fen, fuck I'm sorry. I'm so sorry that I dragged you…"
"Don't." Fenris cut her off, tucking his fingers through Hawke's hair. "Promise me you won't die. I can't bear the thought of living in this world without you."
Hawke laughed, a wild reckless sound that made them all look. "Say that again? I didn't quite catch that, but it sounded like you were admitting how much you liked me, but that couldn't…"
"Let me make it clear for you." With a strong jerk of his arm, Hawke fell into Fenris's chest and he pressed his lips greedily against hers.
"Andraste have mercy." Sebastian whispered. "I dinnae think I'd ever see it. Guess I owe ye that money, dwarf."
It wasn't quite I love you, but it felt like it. The same way it wasn't quite the end of the world, no matter how it felt.
"I'd tell you to cheer up, but it won't solve the main problem."
He'd been staring at his phone as he meandered and hadn't realized he was walking right past the local bar, he certainly didn't see the figure of Beatrix Cadash reclining in the alley against the wall with an unlit joint in one hand and a lighter in the other.
Varric froze, caught off guard by Bea's cheerful teasing voice and her vaguely unsettling words. "And what's the main problem?" He asked carefully. Bea laughed to herself and gestured to his chest.
"Your buttons are on strike, apparently. Probably sick of containing all that hair. I know how to do some waxing if you're interested. Free of charge."
He relaxed just a smidge and glared playfully into the darkness, indicating the paraphernalia in her hands. "And what exactly are you up to?"
"It's legal now." Bea shrugged, raising the joint and lighter to her lips.
"Not in Ferelden." Varric advised, too late. The cigarette caught fire and Bea inhaled quickly, puffing it out in a startled cough.
"What? Balls." She looked forlornly down at the joint. "How likely are they to arrest me here?"
Unlikely, given whose sister she was. She was highly likely to get a stern lecture from someone, though. He leaned against the corner of the alley with a shake of his head, blocking most of Bea's form from view of passerby and looking back down at Bianca's message on his phone. "I'll give you fifteen minutes of cover."
"I expected better stamina from you."
Varric groaned and looked over his shoulder. "I know someone you'd hit it off with. I'll introduce you sometime."
Bea grinned wickedly and brought the joint back up to her lips. "I'll give you a hit if you want."
"With the spiraling death tornado above us, I'd prefer to stay clear headed. Ask me after your sister saves the world." Varric swallowed hard, kept his voice carefully neutral while he turned his face away again. "How's she doing?"
"Funny that." Bea drawled. "I was going to ask you, but there's been a suspicious absence of your name the past few days and you're never around her. Weird, since it seemed like you were always around before I got here. Did a little thing like me scare you off?"
"Hardly." Varric deflected. "Everyone's been busy arranging this summit in Redcliffe. Some of us have to earn our keep."
"Didn't your mama ever tell you not to play a player, Varric?" Bea purred, a light hint of laughter wafting past him with the smoke. "I know you're lying."
He didn't rise to her bait. Instead, he asked a question of his own. "You Carta too?"
"Sometimes." Bea didn't seem particularly bothered by her answer. "I've got the ink, like Maria, but I don't work as much as she does. Mostly because the work Dwyka wants me to do involves turning tricks and Maria would kill him first."
"So what do you do?" Varric asked curiously.
"Take my clothes off while dancing. Usually for money. Sometimes for fun."
"I meant." Varric couldn't keep the long suffering sigh at bay. "For the Carta."
"Oh, that?" Bea laughed and blew more smoke out past Varric's face. He was going to get a terrible contact high from this. He already had a craving for fries. "I make drugs. Party shit, mostly, for the clubs. I'm an ace at chemistry, but Dwyka only needs me when he gets his hands on the raw ingredients, which isn't often. Usually if he buys, he buys them already mixed. Well, until that whole rotten deal with the smack anyway."
"And how do you feel about Dwyka?" Varric asked carefully. Behind him, Bea went silent. She was quiet for so long, he almost believed she ran away. He turned to look at her and found her frowning, staring into space.
"You didn't answer my question." Bea said slowly, carefully, forming the words neatly with her mouth even as the smoke curled around her. "Why's Maria avoiding you?"
"You should ask her." Varric muttered.
"I did." Bea admitted guilelessly. "She didn't answer."
"I downloaded the records. From her trial." Varric admitted guiltily. "I read them all."
Bea scoffed and glared at him. "You and half the world, I'm sure. She can't be mad at everybody that gets a bit curious…."
Bea trailed off, thoughtful, turning her soft gray eyes on him with sudden, steely determination. "Did you believe it?"
For a second, he had. For a second, he thought the worst and he was ashamed to look into Bea's eyes, so much like Maria's, and admit it. "I found out about Dwyka and I thought…"
Bea's face hardened immediately and she lifted her chin imperiously, turning to stub out her joint on the wall. "The good news is that you don't fucking matter." Bea spat out, turning on her heel and shoving past him. "And we're never going back to Ostwick."
