Chapter 62: The Privilege of Obligations
Maura: November, Present Day
Maura was sitting at the kitchen table making notes on the latest case she was consulting on. Unlike before her time away, she usually didn't bring work home these days. However, she and Jane were going away next weekend, and she had a few things she really wanted to finish before then.
Maura could hear Jane moving around the house as she did the laundry. At one point in her life, she would have found it distracting and moved to a quieter location. Now, though, it made her feel safe and secure. It sounded like home, and she loved it. She still loved her work, but she couldn't believe that she had ever thought that her career could be a replacement for this.
Maura hummed when she felt Jane's hand on her shoulder. Jane leaned over to kiss Maura's cheek before sitting in the chair at the head of the table to Maura's left, trailing her hand across Maura's shoulders as she did so.
"How's it going?" Jane asked.
Maura finished the sentence she was working on before she looked up at Jane and smiled. "I have a little more that I need to get through tonight, but I shouldn't be working too late," she said. She reached up and pushed Jane's hair behind her ear before saying, "Why don't you go take a bath or something? Just relax."
Jane scrunched her nose in displeasure. "Without you?" she whined, drawing a chuckle from Maura.
"Is the real reason you sat down here to distract me from my work?" she asked with a smirk.
"Noooo," Jane grumbled, drawing out the word, and Maura didn't believe her for a second. She reached across the table to grasp Jane's hand.
"If you want me to, I'll put it away," Maura said genuinely.
"No, no, it's okay," Jane said quickly. "I'd rather you do it when the kids are asleep or not here."
"I know, but I hate cutting into our time together, too."
Jane nodded. "We'll have plenty of time together next weekend," she said.
"I'm really hoping to wrap up everything I need to do for this case this week," Maura explained. "That basically leaves naptime tomorrow – if we're lucky – and Friday, but if I need to, I can work Monday, too. We don't leave until Thursday morning."
Jane smiled, her thumb rubbing back and forth across Maura's knuckles. "It's really fine," she told Maura. "It'd be great if you could have all of next week off. Are you going to work at all Thanksgiving week? It's totally cool if you want to, just please don't work on Thanksgiving?"
Maura chuckled at the way Jane's voice trailed off. She knew it was awkward for Jane to ask her not to work, even for something like Thanksgiving, but they were both getting better at expressing those kinds of things. Regardless, Maura had never intended to work on Thanksgiving.
"I'm not sure yet," Maura answered. "I told Kent I would work the week after we get back from Charleston. If any cases from that week carryover to the first part of Thanksgiving week, then, I'll probably work a day or two. I won't take on any new cases for that week – one of the perks of no longer being in charge. And there's absolutely nothing that will make me work on Thanksgiving."
"I didn't really think you'd miss it," Jane admitted. "And don't forget that Emma and Finn's parent night is…"
"Wednesday, November 15th," Maura finished, smiling at Jane.
Jane sighed and her shoulders dropped. "Sorry, I…"
Maura leaned over and silenced Jane's apology with a kiss. "You have nothing to be sorry for," she assured Jane.
Jane: November, Present Day
Maura had successfully finished her work by the end of the week, but since both she and Jane had been busier than expected during the week, Maura was now out on a rare, solo, Saturday afternoon grocery run, leaving Jane at home with the kids.
"Mama?" Finn tapped Jane's arm.
"Hey, bug, what's up?" Jane asked kindly, looking down at her daughter from where she sat at the kitchen island. Emma and Finn had been up in their room reading while Harper and Sophie napped, so Jane hadn't been expecting any of the kids to catch her doing some early Christmas shopping on her laptop. She quickly minimized her screen and gave Finn her full attention.
"Um, can I ask you a question?" Finn's voice was so small that it broke Jane's heart.
"Of course, sweetie," Jane replied. She held out her hands and lifted Finn onto her lap. "What's on your mind?"
Finn settled in Jane's lap so that they were face-to-face, and her feet were dangling on either side. Her fingers traced the Rod Sox logo on Jane's t-shirt as she tried to find the right words. Finn reminded Jane so much of Maura in this moment that all she wanted to do was pull the girl into her arms and hold her tight, but she knew that just like her mommy, Finn needed a moment before she could share what was on her mind.
"What happens if you and mommy break up?" Finn asked quietly.
Jane's face scrunched in confusion and concern. She had expected based on Finn's demeanor that she had something heavy on her mind, but she hadn't expected that question. "Why do you think mommy and I are going to break up, bug?" she asked eventually.
"Well, I don't really think you're going to break up, but I just wanna know what would happen if you did."
"Uh, okay, well, first of all, whether mommy and I are dating, married, or not together, nothing will ever change how much either of us loves you and your sisters. Mommy and I are very happy together, so I don't think we're going to break up, but if we did, mommy would probably buy a house close by, and you and your sisters would spend some time living with mommy at her house and some time living with me here.
"But sweetie, I really don't think you need to worry about that happening," Jane tried to assure her daughter. She wondered if this had anything to do with her and Maura's fight a few weeks ago, but she wasn't sure. "Why do you want to know?"
"When you and Stephanie broke up, we didn't get to see her anymore," Finn said.
"Well, Stephanie wasn't your mom," Jane said gently. "She loved you, Emma, and Harper very much, but it wasn't the same."
"What about Harper? Mommy isn't her mommy by blood, and mommy hasn't adopted her yet. Does that mean that mommy is like Stephanie to her? Does that mean that if you and mommy break up, Harper won't get to see mommy anymore?"
Jane was caught off guard by the logic behind Finn's questions. Technically, Finn was right. At this point, Maura's legal connection to Harper was no different than Stephanie's had been to Finn, Emma, and Harper. However, it still wasn't the same. It didn't feel the same. Besides, Stephanie was never going to adopt the girls – all three of them were always Maura's.
"It's complicated," Jane said, but it felt like a cop-out. "Even if mommy and I broke up before she adopted Harper, she would still be Harper's mommy, and Harper would still get to see her. The four of you will always be together. You're right that mommy isn't Harper's mommy by blood nor has she adopted Harper, but mommy and I agreed a long time ago that we were family by love. That means that all four of you girls are also part of that family. It means nothing can take away the fact that both me and mommy are all four of you girls' moms. There are some legal differences that you will understand better as you get older, but what you need to understand right now is that mommy and I always have and always will love all four of you."
"So, nothing is going to change when mommy adopts Harper?" Finn asked.
"There will be some paperwork that mommy and I have to do," Jane said. "But in terms of your day-to-day life or Harper's day-to-day life or Emma and Sophie's day-to-day lives, nothing will change."
"Does that also mean nothing would change if mommy adopted me and Emma?"
"Just like for Harper, there would be some paperwork, but nothing will change for you guys," Jane said. She was finally starting to understand where Finn's concerns were coming from. This wasn't about their fight; it was about the adoption process. Harper's adoption date was coming up in a few weeks, but other than reminding Emma and Finn that they could talk about mommy adopting them anytime, they hadn't pushed the issue.
"Mommy adopting any of you won't change how much mommy loves you or how much I love you. It won't change how either of us treat you or your sisters. It also wouldn't change what would happen to any of you if mommy and I broke up. Is that what you're afraid of?"
Finn chewed on her bottom lip for a few moments before she admitted her deepest concern, "I kinda want mommy to adopt me, too, when she adopts Harper. Emma wants to be adopted, too, but only if mommy adopts both of us. But I'm scared that if mommy adopts us and then if you and mommy break up, we wouldn't see you anymore 'cause then, mommy would be our mommy by blood and our adopted mommy, but you'd only be our adopted mama. But I'm also scared that if mommy doesn't adopt us then, if you break up, we won't get to see mommy anymore. I don't want you and mommy to break up. I want all six of us to live here forever and ever."
"Oh, baby," Jane choked out as she wrapped her arms around Finn and pulled the little girl into a tight embrace. "No matter what, mommy and I love you and your sisters more than anything. Both of us would do absolutely anything to be in your lives, and that won't change if mommy adopts you guys. But sweetie, you really don't need to be worried about me and mommy breaking up, either. I can't predict the future, but mommy and I love each other so much, and we've loved each other for a long time. We plan to be together for as long as possible. One day soon, mommy and I are going to get married. We want to be together forever."
"You love mommy more than you loved Stephanie," Finn said. It was a statement, not a question, but Jane answered anyway.
"Yes, bug. I've never loved anyone the way I love mommy, and that's why I really think we'll be together forever, even if I can't promise anything."
"I'm not really worried that you and mommy are going to break up," Finn said. "But I just wanted to know what would happen if you did."
"It's completely up to you if and when you want mommy to adopt you," Jane said. "Whether mommy adopts you or not will never, ever change how much either of us loves you, and it will never change how we will be in your life. Being adopted is a big thing. It's an important thing, but it's not what makes a family. Love is what makes mommy your mommy just like love is what makes me your mama."
"Do you think mommy still wants to adopt me and Emma?" Finn asked, her voice shaking slightly.
"I know she does, bug," Jane replied. In fact, Maura already had appointments made to adopt all three girls with the hope that Emma and Finn might come around to the idea before then. Only Jane and their lawyer knew this, though. Neither one of them wanted to pressure the girls into something they weren't ready for, so if they didn't bring it up on their own before then, Maura would cancel Emma and Finn's appointments, and they would never know. "Do you want mommy to adopt you?"
Finn nodded against Jane's shoulder, and Jane couldn't stop the smile that tugged at her lips. "Emma does too," Finn whispered, causing Jane's smile to grow.
"I think you guys should talk to mommy," Jane said without releasing Finn from their hug.
"Will you be there, too?"
"If you'd like me to be there, I will be."
"I do," Finn confirmed.
"Why don't the four of us talk tonight before bedtime? After Harper and Sophie go to bed," Jane suggested.
"'Kay," Finn agreed, sitting up again in Jane's lap. "I'm going to go tell Emma."
"Alright, sweetie," Jane said.
"Love you," Finn added, giving Jane another hug before climbing off of her lap. Jane watched Finn walk back up the stairs. The little girl smiled down at Jane as she reached the second floor before disappearing into her room.
Jane turned back to her computer with a huge smile on her face. Of course, she wanted Finn and Emma to make the decision to be adopted when they were ready, but she couldn't deny that she had hoped they would want it sooner rather than later. Now, she couldn't wait until the girls asked Maura tonight.
Maura: November, Present Day
Maura rubbed her hand across her face. The busy week and especially the busy day she'd had today had taken their toll. She was exhausted, and as much as she loved spending time with the kids, she was looking forward to when they went to bed, and she could just relax in Jane's arms. Luckily, Jane had volunteered to handle bath time tonight, clearly recognizing how tired Maura was, so Maura had a few minutes to herself.
Maura poured herself a small glass of wine and sat down on the couch with her iPad to do a little shoe shopping. However, after a few minutes, she found herself listening to the giggles and sweet voices travelling down to her from the upstairs bathroom. She couldn't make out the conversation, but there was no doubt that the kids were having a good time.
Suddenly, the bathroom door opened, and Sophie appeared in her underwear at the top of the stairs. "Mommy," she called down. "Will you come read to me and Harper?"
Maura smiled as she set her empty wine glass and iPad aside. "I'm coming, darling," she called back, and even though she'd definitely needed that moment alone, she was happy to rejoin the chaos that was her family life.
Half an hour, four books, and a change of pajamas later, Maura closed the door to Sophie and Harper's room. She was sure both of them would be sound asleep before she finished saying goodnight to Finn and Emma.
Maura knocked lightly on Emma and Finn's door.
"Come in," a little voice called out.
Jane was sitting on Emma's bed with her back against the wall and an arm around each girl as they read together.
"I just came to say goodnight," Maura said with a smile. She planned to give each of them a kiss and leave Jane to finish their evening routine. Over time, they had fallen into a routine that Maura absolutely loved. Either she or Jane would read to Harper and Sophie while the other read to Emma and Finn, and they would switch back and forth each day. Of course, they both always said goodnight to all four kids.
"Um, mommy, will you stay?" Emma asked nervously.
Maura's eyebrows narrowed in concern. "Of course," she said quickly. She perched on the edge of Emma's bed so that she could still face them, but Emma tugged at her elbow, pulling her back to cuddle with them. Maura smiled as she leaned against Jane's shoulder with Emma between them and Finn on Jane's other side.
Nobody said anything for a moment, causing Maura's anxiety to increase, but Jane must have sensed it. "They have something they want to talk to you about," Jane told Maura quietly.
Maura looked down at Emma and Finn. "You girls can talk to me about anything," she said softly, hoping to convey how much she meant it. "I love you both so much."
Finn reached out and grasped Jane's hand in both of hers before she looked at Maura. "Will you…um, I mean, is it too late to…uh…" she stumbled over her words.
Emma looked at Finn before turning to Maura. "We want to know if you still want to adopt us," she said quickly, helping out her sister, but her voice was so small, so unsure that it broke Maura's heart.
Maura's breath caught in her throat, and her eyes instantly filled with tears. "Come'ere," Maura said thickly, pulling both girls into her lap. She held them both tightly against her chest. "I do want to adopt you girls," she said through her tears. "I have never stopped wanting to adopt both of you."
"Really?" Finn said, lifting her head from Maura's shoulder
"Absolutely," Maura said thickly, the smile evident in her voice. She glanced over to Jane to see the other woman beaming happily at her.
"I love you, mommy," Emma mumbled against Maura's chest.
"Me too," Finn added.
"And I love all three of you," Jane said before wrapping Maura, Emma, and Finn in a big bear hug.
All four of them started laughing as they got tangled together in their group hug, and Maura had yet another moment to add to her ever growing list of favorite moments.
Jane: November, Present Day
"Hugs," Jane said, holding her arms open to Harper and Sophie. Both girls complied instantly, throwing themselves into Jane's embrace. "Be good for nana, grandpa, and nonna, okay?"
Sophie wrapped her arms around Jane's neck and gave her a wet kiss on the cheek. "Gonna miss you, mama, but you and mommy have fun!" she said.
Not to be outdone by her sister, Harper wrapped her arms and her legs around Jane. "Bye, mama," she said as she too kissed Jane's cheek. "We'll be good. Promise."
"Alright, love you guys," Jane said one more time before standing up. She smiled at Maura as Maura turned to follow the girls to the garage. Maura was driving Harper and Sophie to Constance and Arthur's house for the day while Jane put Emma and Finn on the bus. They'd have about an hour to finish getting ready for their trip before they needed to leave for the airport.
Jane was more nervous to be so far away from the girls than she had expected. This was the first time ever she would be in a different state than them. They'd spent nights at other houses, especially their grandparents, but Jane had always been close by.
She knew they'd be fine, and the girls were very excited for their own special weekend with their grandparents. Angela would be staying at the house with the girls overnight all three nights. Harper and Sophie were spending today with Constance and Arthur, and all four girls were also planning to spend Saturday with their nana and grandpa.
Jane knew that she and Maura could get home relatively quickly if something did happen. Still, it was the first time that getting back to the kids would require a flight. She and Maura hadn't talked much about how they were feeling about leaving the girls, but she knew it would likely be a topic of conversation at some point during their trip. Being away from the kids had to be difficult for Maura as well.
Jane walked back to the kitchen where Emma and Finn were finishing their breakfast. "Are you guys ready?" Jane asked as she walked up to the table. She frowned when she found Emma playing with her cereal with her head lying on her good arm on the table. "Are you okay, bean?" she asked, her voice laced with concern.
"'m tired," Emma mumbled, lifting her head up.
Jane glanced at Finn, who was carrying her bowl to the sink, but Finn didn't say anything. Jane reached out and rested her hand against Emma's forehead. "Sweetie, you're hot," she said quickly, kneeling down next to Emma and turning the girl to face her.
Emma's eyes were hooded and bloodshot and her cheeks were flushed.
"Finn, can you run upstairs and grab the thermometer?" Jane asked, turning to address Finn, who was now standing next to the table.
"Yeah," Finn agreed before bounding up the stairs.
"Em, what doesn't feel good?" Jane asked, focusing her attention back on Emma.
"'m okay," she tried, rubbing her eyes. "'m not sick."
Jane chuckled softly at how unconvincing Emma was.
"I wanna go to school, and I wanna spend the weekend with nonna and nana and grandpa," Emma whined.
"I'm pretty sure you're sick, bean," Jane said. "You're not going to school today, but let's see what your temperature is before we make a decision about this weekend."
Jane brushed Emma's hair away from her face and kissed the girl's forehead while they waited for Finn to return with the thermometer. Despite the reassurances she had just given Emma, Jane was already mentally preparing herself for cancelling their trip. If it was just a little cold with no fever, maybe they could still go…but Jane knew she'd never be able to leave with one of the kids sick.
"Here," Finn said, returning with the thermometer and handing it to Jane.
Jane took it from her and took Emma's temperature. "101.6," Jane read off after the beep. "Go put your pajamas back on," she added, kissing Emma's hot forehead.
When Emma was on her way upstairs, Jane turned to Finn. "How do you feel?" she asked.
"Fine," Finn said.
"Let me take your temperature," Jane said. It was normal. "Okay, get your stuff. We should still be able to catch the bus."
As Finn ran to get her coat and schoolbag, Jane yelled up the stairs, "Emma?" When Emma returned to the upstairs landing, Jane told her, "I'm just going to walk Finn to the bus stop. You can see me if you need anything. I'll make you a bed on the couch when I get back."
"'Kay," Emma replied before returning to her room.
"Are you and mommy going to still go on your trip?" Finn asked as Jane walked her to the bus stop a few minutes later.
"I'm going to call mommy as soon as you get on the bus," Jane said. "But probably not."
"Bus!" Finn yelled, completely distracted from their conversation when she saw the school bus turn the corner. Despite the fact that there was no way the bus driver wouldn't see them, she took off, running down the sidewalk to get to the official bus stop before the bus.
Jane laughed. "Bye, bug!" she yelled after Finn, only receiving a cursory wave in reply. She shook her head before turning back to the house and pulling out her phone to dial Maura's number. Unsurprisingly, Maura didn't answer – she was probably inside with her mom and the kids – so Jane sent a text: Emma's sick. Kept her home from school. Fever: 101.6.
Jane let herself back into the house to find Emma curled up in her pajamas on the couch staring off into space.
"Oh, baby," Jane cooed, pulling Emma onto her lap and into her arms.
"I don' feel good," Emma mumbled.
"I know, baby."
"I'm sorry," Emma added.
"Why are you sorry?" Jane asked in confusion as she ran her hand through Emma's hair.
"I woo-ned your trip." I ruined your trip.
"Oh, bean, no you didn't," Jane said gently as she kissed the top of Emma's head. "I'm going to go get you some medicine and I'll bring down pillows and blankets to make you a bed on the couch, okay?"
"No, stay," Emma whined, burrowing closer to Jane.
"But the medicine will make you feel better, bean."
"Inna minute."
"Okay," Jane acquiesced. How could she say no to that? she thought as she tightened her hold around Emma. But when Emma started shivering slightly despite being wrapped in Jane's arms, Jane decided she needed to get the medicine.
"What do you want to watch?" Jane asked as she stood up and laid Emma in the corner of the couch.
"Don' care," Emma mumbled.
"'Kay," Jane said, kissing Emma's forehead. She put on 'Hero Elementary' for Emma, but she was pretty sure Emma would be asleep again within a few minutes.
Maura: November, Present Day
Jane was just settling Emma back into the make-shift bed on the couch after giving her some children's Tylenol when Maura quietly walked into the house.
"How is she?" Maura asked, her voice full of concern. She quickly slipped out of her heels so that the noise wouldn't startle Emma.
"She has a fever," Jane said, joining Maura in the kitchen. "But I just gave her Tylenol. I mean, it's that time of year. She'll be fine."
Maura nodded. Despite Jane's words, Maura could still hear the worry she was trying so hard to hide. Maura squeezed Jane's arm in a comforting gesture as she walked by her on the way to the living room.
"Hi, Sweetie," Maura cooed, sitting on the edge of the couch next to Emma. "How are you feeling?"
"'m sick," Emma whimpered. "But mama gave me medicine."
"She's a good mama; isn't she?" Maura said. She rested the back of her hand on Emma's forehead to feel how warm she was before running her hand through Emma's hair a few times.
"Mmm, yeah," Emma agreed, nodding.
"I'll let you rest, sweetie," Maura said before kissing the top of Emma's head. "Let me know if you need anything."
"'Kay," Emma replied.
Maura walked back over to where Jane was seated at the kitchen island. She gently rubbed between Jane's shoulder blades, trying to relieve some of the tension Jane was holding in her body.
"I'll go cancel the flights and hotel reservation," Maura said quietly, already knowing that Jane was agonizing over how to tell her that she wanted to stay home with the kids.
Jane leaned forward and buried her face in her hands, rubbing it a few times before she turned to look at Maura, her cheek resting on her hand. "I'm sorry, Maura," she said softly.
Maura smiled and leaned in to kiss Jane. "Don't be," she said kindly. "I know our mothers are completely capable of taking care of a sick kid, but I don't want to leave when any of them are sick either.
"Thank you," Jane said, sitting up straight again.
"I'll go make the calls upstairs," Maura said, stealing another quick kiss before grabbing her discarded shoes and heading upstairs. Just before she stepped into their bedroom, she saw Jane move to the couch and pull Emma into her arms. It warmed her heart.
A little over an hour later, Maura was just finishing making the changes and letting their parents know about their change in plans when Jane knocked and stepped into the room.
"School just called," Jane said defeatedly, not waiting for Maura to greet her. "Finn's sick now."
"Oh, no," Maura said, shutting her laptop.
"It always happens," Jane said, shaking her head. "I seriously considered not sending her to school today because I knew she'd get sick, but she was perfectly fine this morning. Anyway, one of us has to go get her."
"I'll go pick her up," Maura said quickly. "You stay with Emma. I talked to both of our mothers, too. I asked Harper and Sophie if they still wanted to stay with their grandparents this weekend – after asking Angela and my mother first, of course. I thought we might have a better chance of them staying healthy, but they really want to come home tonight. Your mom is going to pick them up from my parents' house, feed them dinner, then bring them home."
While she was talking, Maura had gathered her things and was already ready to walk out the door to get Finn.
"Ugh, I kinda wish they wanted to stay with ma," Jane said. "But I get it. I think we should try to keep them separate. I've already been snuggling with Emma, so even if we've both been exposed, I've prolly been more exposed. So, why don't I stay with them for a few days, and you stay with Harper and Sophie for a few days. Maybe, Harper and Sophie can sleep in here with you and use this bathroom. I'd really like to do whatever we can to avoid all four getting sick."
Maura nodded. She didn't love the idea of being separate from Jane, Emma, and Finn, but it absolutely made the most sense. "When we get Finn home, let's set them up upstairs, and I'll disinfect the rest of the house."
"Yeah, good idea," Jane said. "I'll move Emma upstairs while you get Finn, if that's okay."
"Okay, I'm going to go get her now," Maura said, walking with Jane back downstairs.
When Maura arrived at the school, Finn was waiting for her in the office. "Hey, sweetie," Maura said gently, quickly picking up Finn.
"Mommy," Finn whined, instantly wrapping her legs and arms around Maura and resting her head on Maura's shoulder.
Maura kissed Finn's forehead before picking up her backpack and signing the parent pick-up form at the desk.
"I don' feel good," Finn said as Maura carried her to the car. "Where's mama?"
"She's at home with Emma," Maura said. She wasn't surprised that Finn wanted Jane when she didn't feel well. "She's going to have everything ready for you when we get home, okay?"
"Mmm," Finn said noncommittally, letting Maura set her in her booster seat.
"I'm sorry you don't feel well, baby," Maura said once she had buckled Finn in.
"I want mama," Finn whined,
"I know, sweetie," Maura said, kissing Finn's forehead.
"I still love you. I just want mama," Finn said half-heartedly.
"It's okay to want mama," Maura said. "I know you love me, and I love you, too." And she meant it. It hurt a little bit to hear Finn ask for Jane instead of her, but she never would have expected differently. In fact, she'd probably have been concerned if she didn't because it would mean Finn was trying to spare Maura's feelings, and Maura never wanted her kids to feel like they had to protect her.
Maura closed the door and got in the car. Finn remained quiet as they drove home, and Maura could tell how miserable the little girl felt every time she looked at her in the rearview mirror. Luckily, they didn't live far from the school, so before long, Maura was carrying Finn into the house.
Jane and Emma were already in Emma and Finn's bedroom, so Maura carried Finn directly upstairs.
Jane stood up as soon as she saw Maura and Finn enter. She crossed the room in two strides and pulled Finn into her arms.
"Oh, bug, let's get you changed and into bed," Jane said, brushing Finn's hair away from her flushed face. Turning to Maura, she added, "Thanks."
Maura smiled, and despite the fact that she knew she probably shouldn't, she softly kissed both Jane and Finn's cheeks before leaving the room. "I'll bring something light for lunch in a bit, okay?" she said from the doorway. "Let me know if you need anything."
"Thanks, Maur," Jane said, smiling softly.
Maura closed the door behind her before returning downstairs, intending to disinfect the first floor and her car. She absolutely hated that the girls were sick, but something about this moment felt significant. For years, she would have given anything to be able to care for the girls – healthy or sick, in the good times or the hard times – and now she was getting too.
And as much as she was looking forward to her weekend away with Jane – and would continue to look forward to it whenever they rescheduled it – somehow this was better. Parenting with Jane, real life with Jane…with their family…there was nothing better.
A/N: At the beginning of the chapter, Maura reflects on her previous opinion that her career would be enough for her. I just want to clarify, that I (as the author) do think that, for some people, their career can be fulfilling. However, my interpretation of Maura is that she needs and longs for a family, despite how important her job is to her. Others may disagree, and that's totally fine. I just wanted to make it clear that I'm not ascribing this philosophy to everyone.
Okay, and WE'RE BACK! New chapters will be posted on Monday evenings (eastern US). This was a bit of a transition chapter, and yet, I kinda love the little moments that are actually big moments in it (and I love the chapter title, lol). We have a number of big things coming up as we wrap up the story though. Thank you for those who have stayed along for the ride!
