We're back with another, folks. This one has two focuses, one from gameplay and the other not...yet? I mean, there's no way a JRPG with a sauna is not going to use it for fanservice. Totally expecting that to be DLC. Oh yeah, and there's also cooking in this. Thanks to my other stories, I have a wide range of recipes at my disposal, meaning you could actually try the recipe mentioned out. Anyway, let's go!

Summary: The Golden Deer have gone mysteriously missing and it's down to Lysithea to find out the truth. Fortunately for her, she comes across Mercedes, who could be the help she needs.


Lysithea gave a sigh as she sat down, dangling the tips of her toes into the water. Not even the serene sight of fish going about their daily lives was enough to draw the white haired girl out of her funk, Lysithea ultimately giving up in favour of curling into a ball.

There was rarely a day where you couldn't find at least some of the Golden Deer hanging out; as opposed to the Leicester Alliance itself, rife with inner turmoil and corrupt conflict, the Golden deer students were surprisingly close regardless of the bickering that plagued their classroom. Particularly on such a beautiful day like today, where they had no official lessons planned, the gold bearing students could often be found lazing about, watching Leonie and Raphael trained while the others either pitched in or went about their own hobbies.

It was why Lysithea was so shocked to find the grass outside their classroom completely devoid of her classmates, as well as the classroom itself. In fact, they didn't seem to be any trace of them at all in the entirety of Garreg Mach! While it was certainly no small area to traverse, especially for one who wasn't exactly built for physical exertion, it was near impossible for such a thing to occur unless they were on a mission.

Despite her concerns, Lysithea gave a small huff to herself. After that little confrontation, they wouldn't be so idiotic to take a mission and exclude her. Not if they didn't want to face her wrath.

No, there had to be some other reason, some logical connection that Lysithea was missing. For such an eclectic mess of personalities to all disappear at the same time, there had to be a special reason. While some could be potentially visiting family or handling manners that their nobility would require them to, the probability of everyone in her class having to attend to such a thing at once was incredibly low.

The only thing that could possibly evidence such a weak hypothesis would be if a major issue tore through the Leicester Alliance and while her family wasn't exactly the most important, she was still the heir of a land bearing house. She would've surely been informed along with everyone else if such a thing were to occur.

The possibility of a mass illness had passed through Lysithea's mind. After all, if there had been a medical issue with the Golden Deer that the infirmary was unable to handle, then they would've been shipped to a more capable, proper hospital. A quick visit to Professor Casagranda however almost immediately disproved it however; there had been no reports of even light illness at all.

With no chores to be handled on the weekend, and therefore no need for people to leave the monastery, Lysithea was left completely stumped. It simply didn't make any logical sense for everyone to disappear at once, not if they were leaving her alone.

"Now then Lysithea, what has you so downtrodden?" the sweet voice of Mercedes spoke from behind, Lysithea turning upwards to see the older Blue Lion crouching down beside her. "I can't stay sad when I'm near the fish. Something must be bothering you badly."

"Just a little confused." Lysithea sighed. "Everyone's disappeared from the Golden Deer and I have no idea where they are. It's worrying."

Lysithea was silently thankful that it was Mercedes that had stumbled across her. Save for the Professor and perhaps Edelgarde, she was one of the easiest people to talk to anyone could ever hope to come across - being raised as part of the church did that to people. It was just… so hard to be upset around her, for Mercedes naturally exuded an aura of joy and warmth like one would expect from their own mother.

"Everyone's disappeared? Oh dear…" Mercedes replied, holding her hands to her mouth. "Well, I'm sure if it were something important they would've told you. Are you sure they didn't leave you a message?"

"Nope, nothing! It's like they all turned into ghosts!" the white haired girl said, before promptly regretting it as the image passed through her mind. Oh god, she was not going to be haunted by the spirits of her classmates. Claude would totally try and do that if he could. "I've checked everywhere. The only thing I could do from this point is search the rest of Fodlan."

"Hmm, how strange…" Mercedes hummed, a sudden smile appearing on the blonde's face as she reached behind her and pulled out a small slip of paper, an innocuous appearance that betrayed how valuable it was. "It wouldn't do any good if you end up collapsing from stress though. I'll bring this up with the professors and see if I can't find any answers. You should relax and de-wind, before you hurt yourself."

Lysithea could barely believe her eyes as she took the slip, looking at the elegant script emblazoned upon the front.

"Mercedes, you're actually giving me a Sauna Slip!?"

"I was fortunate enough to come across one, but I've never been too enamoured with the idea. I'm sure you'll appreciate it more." came the giggly reply. "Like I said, relax and let me handle this for now. I'll come to the sauna if I find anything out."

The Blue Lion was acting way too casual about the gift she was giving. While Garreg Mach Monastery was home to an amazing sauna, access to it was incredibly rare; to assist with raising funds for the monastery, the sauna was often rented out. Therefore, unless students begged their families for the necessary funds, it was rare to see a resident of the Officer's Academy have the necessary slip to get past the door. It must've cost Mercedes an arm and a leg, and here she was imply giving it away because she didn't feel like it.

"I… thank you Mercedes! Not only are you giving me this, you're dealing with my problems as well…" Lysithea replied, bowing her head deeply as she got to her knees.

"Oh no, not at all. With recent events, members of the Officer's Academy disappearing is everyone's problem. I would be a fool not to act." The blonde was quick to reassure, helping Lysithea to her feet and brushing off her uniform. Admittedly, it made Lysithea feel like a child, but she could tolerate it in the face of Mercedes' kindness. "Now off you go. Enjoy yourself. I'll have it all handled."

"Okay… thank you Mercedes!" watching Lysithea walk off hesitantly, clutching the Sauna Slip as if it were an irreplaceable treasure, Mercedes did her best to hide the small smile that threatened to appear. Considering who Mercedes was, that ultimately meant it appeared without resistance, along with some hushed giggles.

"That poor girl. If only she knew the truth… Claude, you best know what you're doing."


Byleth approached the task with the same vigour one would expect of a knight upon the field. With all of his tools prepared eagerly by Mercedes, the blue haired man immediately leapt into action, barely a word leaving his lips.

While the flames brought 500 millilitres of milk to barely above room temperature, dextrous hands carefully lined the sides and bottom of a tin with butter, placing a small sheet of paper upon the bottom. That formed the perfect vessel for their final product, placed aside while the man turned his attention elsewhere.

Dutifully accepting the 3 eggs and extra egg yolk that his assistant had prepared, Byleth added 100 grams of sugar, the might and muscle built from endless hours of training and battle used to beat the ingredients together until they were perfectly combined. With 70 grams of cocoa powder and a teaspoon of vanilla extract (lovingly made by the chefs at the monastery itself, despite vanilla most prominently coming from outside of Fodlan), they were prepared to enter the next step.

And what perfect timing it was, for the milk had reached optimal temperature at that moment according to Mercedes' measurements. Once the Blue Lion slowly began to add said milk, the professor vigorously stirring all the while, a strange looking paste began to transform into a far more inviting dark mixture, the rich scent of chocolate wafting into the air.

It was primed for its new container, the mix gliding smoothly into the greased tin with nary a trace remaining in the mixing bowl. That tin was then placed into a roasting tray, one that Mercedes had taken care to fill with enough boiling water as to half fill the tin; enough for the water to serve its purpose with little chance of encountering the mixture itself.

Byleth carefully turned to the oven, brought up to a temperature by Mercedes: approximately 160 degrees Celsius. There would their masterpiece remain for 50 minutes, drawing in the ambient heat and metamorphosing into something that could be described as truly magical.

That wasn't to say that their hands remained idle for such a length of time. No, they were quickly put to work by Byleth and Mercedes carefully chopping 120 grams of dark chocolate and bringing a pot of water to the boil respectively.

With roughly 4 teaspoons' worth of sugar syrup prepared and butter brought forth from the cold store to reach room temperature, the chocolate would be placed into a mixing bowl, one that perfectly sat upon the boiling water. Such meant that the chocolate and butter would melt without burning, creating a beautiful thick glaze that would complement their dessert magnificently.

That was to say nothing of the special garnish that Mercedes had prepared, something far beyond Byleth's admittedly limited knowledge in the world of the culinary arts.

White chocolate, roughly chopped and placed upon a baking tray lined with paper. Though held at a slightly lower temperature than their main creation – approximately 120 degrees rather than 160 – it had still attained a beautiful deep golden brown colouration with careful stirring every 10 minutes. Sitting in the cold store, it would be a delight crumbled over their work.

All that was left was to prepare some Brighid imported cherries and crumble some shortbread biscuits famous within the Leicester Alliance and everything was prepared. All they had to do was wait.


Lysithea sank into the waters, any worries melting away as she basked in the heat. Even if the ugly thoughts still reared up at the back of her mind, the reassurances of Mercedes combined with the intimate experience was more than enough to make her content with savouring the sauna.

A smile settled upon her face. She was one of the few students who would ever get to use the sauna during their school time.

Except she really wasn't meant to be. Mercedes was. It was her who had received the sauna slip, a highly expensive and coveted item that few would give away so easily. Mercedes was meant to be the one enjoying herself, yet here Lysithea was, basking in luxury while Mercedes did the work the white haired girl was meant to. Despite the fact that the blonde said she didn't care, it made every second that Lysithea spent in the waters feel guilty.

Rising from the sauna and reaching for her towel, a thought suddenly came to Lysithea's mind. If Mercedes was not one for saunas, then why did she have a slip for access? It would make no sense to purchase one herself, nor would it make sense for anyone to give it to her if she didn't like them. Actually, Mercedes was rather fond of skincare, having the softest skin imaginable; surely she would love the sauna that was famed for making your skin years younger?

Lysithea quickly put the thought out of her mind. It would not do to look a gift horse in the mouth.

With her lithe form dried and her hair as close to dry as she could hope to get it, the white haired girl stepped out into the cold crisp air of the afternoon, stretching with a yawn. If she had spent any longer in there, there was no telling if she would've fallen asleep or not.

"Time to get back to work then… I've let Mercedes do too much for me as is…"

"Oh, so you've finished then? Was it as good as they say?" Lysithea had to do her best to hold back her squawk of surprise. Say what you will about the gentle nature of Mercedes, but it was frightening how she could suddenly appear out of nowhere. "…Lysithea?"

"Y-yeah, it was great. I still feel kind of bad that you just gave it to me for no reason." Lysithea muttered. If nothing else, then she could just blame the redness of her cheeks on the heat of the sauna. "More importantly, did you figure out where everyone was!?"

"Yes, you came out just in time in fact! Come, I'll take you there right now!" Mercedes eagerly answered, grabbing Lysithea's arm and near bolting it towards the classroom.

It took all Lysithea had to stay on her feet, but if it meant learning about the whereabouts of her classmates, she would give it her all. That alone was enough to bring new energy to her feet, running at such a speed that if it weren't for the need for Mercedes to lead the way, Lysithea would've left her in the dust. As it was, it was clear that they were heading for the classrooms, Lysithea bursting through the door and…!

"SURPRISE!"

The instincts distilled into her by Byleth immediately kicked into action, barely a second passing before dark magic welled at her fingertips and became a thick miasma that flew towards the source of the sound. With the threat of the Death Knight and all sorts of foul people entering the monastery there was no time to hesitate in the face of an ambush.

It was only when Lysithea stopped to see the back of the Professor's coat burnt to a cinder, bloody baked flesh on show, when she realised that it was no ambush.

"P-Professor! I'm so sorry!" Lysithea immediately cried as she began to heal the wound to the best of her ability. Taking no notice of the people surrounding or the rather strange appearance of the classroom, she focused all that she had on healing; her magic caused no small amount of damage. "I thought that somebody had taken you, or you were ambushed, with everyone else! Where have you been!?"

"Preparing." Was all he said, completely unflinching as he threw his arm out and Lysithea got a proper look at the room.

Colourful streamers decorating the rooftop. A large assortment of patterned paper-wrapped boxes sitting to the side. a veritable feast of food all crammed onto the largest table available, which would've been vaporised if it weren't for Byleth's intervention. It would take a few moments, but the realisation hit like a truck, Claude stepping forward with a sigh.

"You're looking like this came out of nowhere. You always were the dedicated worker, but I never thought you would be so stressed that you would forget your own birthday." The Golden deer leader remarked with his hands behind his head. "Guess I can't blame you though. We didn't really get a distraction or excuse ready in time."

"There wouldn't have been a distraction at all if it weren't for the Professor roping in Mercedes at the last minute." Hilda scolded with a tut, lightly slapping the boy on the shoulder. "Sorry about that Lysithea. The original plan was for someone to tell you that we'd been tasked with a delivery. You know, to make the whole 'large number of boxes' thing seem reasonable. We never meant to worry you like that."

"Weren't you meant to do that Hilda?" Leonie pointed out.

"Me? Of course not. I would never forget such a crucial part of the plan!"

"Mercedes…? Then the whole sauna situation…!" Lysithea realised, turning to where the blonde was openly giggling.

"That ticket was your birthday present. When the Professor asked me to keep you occupied, I thought to give it to you a little earlier than planned and have you use it immediately. My apologies for misleading you." Mercedes explained. "I was afraid you were going to reject it, but you accepted luckily. It gave the Golden Deer enough time to prepare and for me to help the Professor make you a cake."

"Wait, you made this cake Professor?" Lysithea repeated as she looked at the gorgeous log of pure chocolate.

Covered in crumbled shortbread, a selection of berries and caramelised white chocolate, sitting on a blanket of rich ganache, the baked chocolate mousse cake was a masterpiece to behold. Simply looking at it was enough to trigger Lysithea's deep seated cravings for sugar, not at all helped by Byleth holding out a piece for her.

"I never celebrated my birthday. I had to ask everyone what was appropriate." Byleth stated waiting for Lysithea to take the slice before awkwardly rubbing the back of his head. "The chefs were too busy to prepare a cake, so I asked Mercedes how to create my own. I had initially thought of gifting you a strategy book, but I was informed that it was inappropriate…"

The white haired girl had already made up her mind on the matter from the moment she looked at the cake, but that didn't stop her from eagerly taking the biggest chunk possible and shoving it into her mouth with all of the grace of a child. A chocolate smeared smile appeared on her face, though she was polite enough to swallow before speaking.

"It's great Professor! It tastes amazing!" She praised. "All of this… I can't believe you would go to this much trouble for me."

"Nothing less for our best magical bomb." Claude replied, laughing even as her elbow rammed into his stomach.

On that cheerful note, the party began in earnest, those Lysithea knew from other houses and years filtering in to join the fun. Great food was eaten, a strange mess of games invented by Raphael and surprisingly, Marianne, were played and Lorenz only got on people's nerves once.

Lysithea sat back with a content grin. It was exactly like the idiots that made the Golden Deer to make her worry so much for such a petty reason. Still, one would be hard pressed to find such a group better suited for someone as unique as herself.

She would never forget that day.


And that's it for this time. I know Lysithea's birthday is the 28th day of the Pegasus Moon, meaning February, but I couldn't wait seven months just for a neat little detail. Please tell me what you think of this chapter. Next time, things are a little more... non-canon.

Super hero time! See you next time!