The Month Peter Parker Learned Humility
Chapter 3: Monday September 3rd/Labor Day
"So should I wear the button down or just MJ's bowtie on the Spider-Suit?", Peter frantically asks May. "Just the bowtie, the top'll make you look like a Superhero World waiter. Ya gotta look better than Thor for your big ceremony!" "But I thought the button down wasn't returnable because it was—" "We'll find a different time to wear it, maybe for Ben's birthday dinner." A sudden silence filled the air. "… yeah, I can wear it there. Anyway, you want me to go on my own there, text you where it is or do you and MJ want to go with me?"
"No, you go ahead, me and Mary Jane will follow the news trucks around Central Park. Plus, I Googled up some stuff about their special events in the city." "You did? What'd ya find?" "They have a knack for throwing parties at Belvedere Castle." "I'll check that out and call the both of you, in case you're reading another Bugle Sound-Off!", Peter replies as he swings out of the kitchen window, his mask covering all but his mouth biting a cold pepperoni slice. "You used to work for them, smart ass."
As he swings from Forest Hills to Manhattan's Museum Mile, Peter sees a large crowd head towards Turtle Pond. "Well, May was right for once. Actually, she's always right, except for me not being an Avenger", Peter ponders inside his head, swinging between the tree branches. "I can finally BE someone, someone that can protect them and the city. Someone that can't be hunted down or hurt, someone MJ can love better than anyone could ask for! Now why wouldn't I want to be that?" Landing on the roof of the Delacorte Theater, Peter immediately gets more than his fair share of cameras and reporters.
"Spider-Man, can you confirm and/or deny that you will fight on Avengers missions abroad?", asked a Spectrum News reporter. "Can't you wait 'till the ceremony actually starts?" "Spider-Man! Eddie Brock, CNN! Will you be using Stark enhanced tech, now that you'll be the 7th Avenger?" "No comment, wait for the show to star—" "Spider-Man, Betty Brant, DBNR! Can you tell us whether you'll be taking orders from SHIELD or the Avengers themselves?" "Again, no comment! And good to see you back on the field, Betty", Peter replies in an almost flirtatious matter, swinging off into the trees above the Turtle Pond pier. Reporters from all over the media circuit try to track his movement in the trees, but he loses them quite easily as he catches his breath before the big show.
Roughly a half hour later, the Avengers logo can be seen plastered above a small stage, facing the water of Belvedere Castle on this extra sunny Labor Day. "Spider-Man, do you swear to answer the call whenever the Avengers assemble in your town?", asked a stoic Captain America. "I do, sir." "Do you swear to help out any and all citizens in mortal danger, regardless of how dangerous our villains may be?" "Sir, yes sir." "Do you swear to serve as an inspiration to men, women and children all over the world?" "I do, sir." "Then you are an Avenger, Spider-Man. Go ahead and make the call, son."
"Well, if you say so, Cap. …AVENGERS ASSEMBLE!" Immediately after Peter calls for his new teammates, Iron Man slams into the stage, fist first. The Hulk roars a pathway for him to sprint in and jump onto the stage. Thor gracefully rockets right next to Cap, as the Ant-Man and Wasp fly in on dragonflies, growing right in front of Spidey's eyes.
"When you guys say Avengers Assemble, you really assemble!", muttered Spider-Man, hoping no one would hear him. "Ay verily, Man of Spiders! Tis why we summon ourselves in such a manner", replies Thor. "Hulk hungry, say cheese for puny camera people already!", yells a disgruntled Hulk. As the cameramen take pictures of the new Avengers team, a large, unmarked white van crashes into the ceremony crowd. "Stark, where are you, ya war mongering mother fucker?!", bellows a portly, armored and masked mad man. "You can't live a life of freedom if your weapons and stupid suits take that away from the rest of the world!"
"Hulk, do what you always do", Cap sternly ordered. As the green goliath steamrolls towards the portly terrorist, the madman creates an organic forcefield around himself. "I don't want to fight any Avenger except the armored one", the portly man calmly stated. "You're wrong and you know it, Stark! Mutants are here, they're here to stay, and we'll inherit the Earth by any means necessary", he monologues while opening the trunk of his van. Inside the van lies a child-sized meteor, smoking from the pores of its rocky exterior. "Go get him, my little Kinder egg from outer space." The portly terrorist then slams his force-field enabled fist into the dead center of the meteor, cracking it open and releasing slime-like goo of varying shapes and colors.
As the goo creatures are unleashed upon an innocent crowd and not-so-innocent heroes, Captain America's shield slashes through these new liquid threats. "Contain the fighting inward as much as possible, Spider-Man!", Cap barks. "These,.. things, I don't know how they fight, so keep it tight enough that we always have the upper hand. They can't be as bad as HYDRA, they don't even have a face!"
Ant-Man launches small red pills at each goo, releasing cages that entrap them. The Wasp flies above the crowd, crop dusting the goo creatures with more shrunken down containment cages. Thor and Hulk punch their way to glory, weakening the goo's strength.
Cap and Iron Man strategize a "slice and atom splice 'em" plan to handle this strange, sticky threat. Spider-Man, feeling confident that the civilians are now out of harm's way, finally rose up to the challenge of fighting alongside The Avengers. "Hey, Cap! Looks like everyone's gonna be able to report another day, how many of these things are left to take care of?", Peter asked. "There's maybe two or three left, if what Ant-Man told me is correct, Spider-Man. Just contain them with Ant-Man's tech", Cap replied. "Go find Ant-Man and get the last of the cages." Spidey, now with a mission, swings off to finish the job.
"Ant-Man, where you at? I need some of those little red pills, bro! Bro, where are you?", Peter asks with purpose in his voice. "You didn't shrink into infinity, did ya? Where are you, man; this isn't funny anymore!" His Spider-Sense soon flares up like a bomb as a large, slick, oil-black goo encases the web-slinger in a slimy cocoon. He tries to first wiggle, then wrestle and lastly web his way out of the menacing goo, failing each time. The goo begins to truly entrap Peter. "Get out of my body! Get out get out get out!" The goo then creates a bubble around Peter and a nearby tree, with Peter's increasingly louder screams silenced like pressing a mute button. The goo then crawls up Peter's body, granting him a new outfit with a slick black, organic design and white chest spider.
"W-w-What's this? What did you do to me?", Peter asks the goo. One last blood red goo can be seen, eating a paparazzo hiding in the bushes. He instinctively strikes his iconic, two-fingered webbing pose, yet on his left hand, the goo extends itself and grabs the last of the goo like a tentacle, gripping its prey. It then uses Peter's right hand to grapple a tree branch, swing up, grab another, and so on until landing at the Avengers stage. "Show your identity right now, or die", Iron Man asserts as his left arm charges up for a powerful energy blast. "Relax guys, it's me, Spider-Man! The goo helped me capture one of the others. It was eating a dude alive, but I think this guy's an ally." The goo then slides up and off of Peter, resting on his left shoulder like a liquid cape.
"…Kid, what the hell do you think you're doing calling these 'things' an ally?", asks Ant-Man. "And where's the red one?" The black goo spits out the red, murderous, slimy creature. Its weakened status was apparent, as it could barely crawl half a foot towards Ant-Man without tiring out. The smallest Avenger did't care, as he quickly entrapped it in the last of his red pill cages. "Now, I know you're a bit younger than our usual teammates, so I'm only gonna say this nicely once: give me the black goo, too. Give it now, please." "But why, if he's helping—" "Don't call IT 'he', or anything other than an it! It's alive, it's not something I've ever seen on this planet, and it's a possible danger to you and everything we know just like those damn dirty Iraqis back in '02! Now cough it up, ROOKIE."
"Hank, calm down", Wasp begged her increasingly angered husband, hoping to keep him in-check. "He's just a kid from Queens, like he knows what—" "SHUT YOUR MOUTH FORE I SHUT IT FOR YA, JAN!", Hank replies, shaking the back of his right hand quite close to her cheeks. "NOW GIVE ME THE DAMN GOO, YA LITTLE SHIT!" A startlingly shaken Peter lifts his left arm, signaling for the goo to give itself up to a fully enraged Ant-Man. "Fucking dumb ass kid, can't even help but befriend the damn enemy. Just like your generation to switch sides the same way you switch and flip-flop ya genders", Hank mutters to himself as he mounts a dragonfly back to Avengers Mansion. A crying, humiliated Wasp flies behind her bitter lover in tears and shame. "Hank, get back here now. We need a serious discussion about manners again", Cap demands in his comm link, chasing that very dragonfly down like a HYDRA tank. Thor and Hulk, changing into Bruce Banner, a mild-mannered gamma specialist, follow suit.
"I think you should head over to the Mansion for last-minute paperwork on Friday. At least then we'll have talked some sense back into Hank, Peter", Iron Man politely asks this very scared boy. "He's just,… Well, not everyone has the morals of Steve Rogers, Pete. Sorry this has to be the way you find out." Iron Man then blasts off back to his mansion/super-powered office, leaving behind a spider of a man.
"I know, Mr Iron Man. I know not everyone's what you think they are", Peter whispers to himself, swinging out of the now inactive crime scene and somberly reminiscing over Harry Osborn.
END OF CHAPTER 3
