The Month Peter Parker Learned Humility

Chapter 8: Saturday September 8th

"You feeling good enough to talk about yesterday, Pete?', asks a doting Aunt May, cooking wheat cakes just the way her nephew likes. "I knew something bad happened over there from the way you didn't talk at all once you came home. Or was it school? Or Mary Jane? Or maybe even another girl you had you sig—" "I don't know if I wanna be an Avenger anymore, May", dryly replies Peter, walking down the stairs and into the kitchen. "They treat me like a pet, something that just has to do what they say because they say. And when I found something to help out, they take it from me and call me names and call MJ names and make me feel like real shit." "Peter! Language, but wow. What did you find that they took away from you, Petey?" "Remember on Labor Day, when those goo creature things were let outta that meteor?" "…yes, I do. You and your new friends trapped them, but never found the guy responsible for it." "Well, all of them are contained somewhere with a SHIELD logo on it except one." "Peter, what did you do, boy?" "Well, when I was fighting the goos and putting them in Ant-Man's traps, I found one, and.." "And…?" "And it helped me capture one and now I can look like this." Peter then reveals his oil-black design, white spider-symbol and all.

"Peter Benjamin Parker, what in the name of our Holy Lord and Savior is that?!", asks a shocked May, dropping her batter bowl right on the tiled kitchen floor. "It's the alien who helped me out! Do you like it?" "Peter, that's not of this Earth and I don't know what it'll do to you. Take it off, it is not cloth nor is it your friend! Let me see the face of my nephew, alien!" "C'mon, it's just a symbiote—" "SYMBIOTE, AS IN SYMBIOTIC CREATURE?! AS IN IT FEEDS OFF OF YOUR ENERGY JUST LIKE A PARASITE?!" "Yes, but I think I can train it, it designed this suit so it has intelligence of some kind! Give me a chance." "NO. TAKE IT BACK RIGHT NOW." "Let. Me. Try." "…I swear to God, Peter, you've given me so much fucking stress lately." "Language!"

Back at Avengers Mansion, Captain America and the teammates of Ant-Man have a serious discussion. "Can we go back to our lives already, I don't need a talking to like I'm a five year old?", Hank sarcastically asks. "No, Hank. You keep treating a fellow Avenger like garbage", Janet replies sternly. "You don't have to like Spider-Man, but you have to give him respect!" "Not if he allies with the enemy and calls me Pip-Squeak! He's a menace, just like the late J. Jonah Jameson said." "Look, Hank, the kid didn't do THAT much wrong. He's just a kid who's getting back on the super train. We gotta give Peter a chance."

"We did, and he failed miserably! He. Harbored. The enemy." "It was his first day, and like the kid's dealt with aliens before", Iron Man added. "Did you deal with aliens and a new team dynamic IN HIGH SCHOOL?" "HIGH SCHOOL?! I thought he was an eighth grader. Why the hell are we bringing him in anyway, if he's in high school? He can't even vote yet!", Hank replies, scoffing at the age of his supposed teammate. "If I were his dad, I'd give him a firm hand of manners—" "Like you did with me, Hank?", asks Janet. "No no, not like you, you dumb bitch. Worse." "Hank, now that I think about, we really have to talk about the way you treat Janet. And women. And everyone, really."

"I treat everyone with respect—" "If you hit anyone again, if you threaten anyone again, we will publicly remove you from the Avengers and make sure EVERYONE in the media knows what you're really doing. I'm sick and tires of paying off nurses and doctors about how Janet gets hurt each time. It's disgraceful, abusive and all around something Cap would murder you for if you weren't on the Top Ten Smartest Men Alive list", Tony Stark says, removing his helmet and staring Hank directly in his eyes, making sure the smallest Avenger fully understands this promise.

"Is this really how you guys feel? I'm a monster, but I'm too smart to lose?", asks a scared Ant-Man. "Yes, Hank, but you never listen", replies Janet. "You really think a girl like me wants to go outside and look pretty with a shiner the size of Thor's hammer?" "It's a grave problem, and I will beat your ass the next time you do it, now that Tony endorses me teaching you manners the way you should be taught", Cap adds into this tense talk. "Enough is enough, Hank. Fix yourself or we fix you", he concludes before walking away from the team. Suddenly, a whoosh of wind floods the room. "Thine Rainbow Bridge needed severe repairs. What have I missed, fellow Avengers?", asks an extremely late Thor.

END OF CHAPTER 8