"I'm telling you guys, I know what I heard!" Stan reiterated to his friends in as close to a shout as he could get without being bitched at for 'Disrupting the study hall again'.

'Tell him.' Kenny mentally commanded himself.

"Nobody's saying you don't, I'm just saying that maybe there some another explanation." Kyle reasoned.

'Tell him.'

"She's going over to some guy's house today after school! What other explanation is there?!" Stan asked.

'Tell him.'

"Maybe they're just studying." Kyle suggested.

"Yeah, studying." Cartman chimed in, "AKA fucking. Gross dirty hippie fucking." he specified to Stan's horror.

'Dude, that would rule!' Kenny thought, 'No wait, shit. Focus, dumbass. You've gotta tell him!'

"Shut up Cartman!" Kyle scolded.

"I don't see what you're still so bummed out about anyway, that psycho maced you, and more importantly me, for no reason." the fat boy pointed out, "She's always been a bitch but now I think she's officially graduated to cunt status."

"SHUT THE FUCK UP CARTMAN!" Stan and Kenny shouted in unison.

"HEY! THIS IS YOUR FINAL WARNING, IF YOU LITTLE BASTARDS CAN'T KEEP QUIET THEN ALL FOUR OF YOU ARE GOING TO THE PRINCIPAL'S OFFICE!" the study hall supervisor warned.

"Sorry." Stan and Kenny said in their second chorus.

"What's your fucking problem Kenny?" Cartman questioned, the rest of the group eyeing him in similar curiosity.

'Okay, now that you have everybody's attention, tell him.' the boy coughed slightly, "I've just been really stressed out lately, and your stupid fucking voice is pissing me off." he lied through the fabric of his parka… Well, technically it was the truth, just not the one he needed to tell, 'Pussy.' he mentally scolded himself.

"What do you think Kenny? Has Bebe said anything to you about Wendy having a boyfriend?" Stan asked.

"Bebe? What the fuck are you talking about?" the other boy questioned in return.

"I mean, you guys are dating, right?" the boy pressed, "Look dude, it's cool. I mean, it's kind of weird that you're dating Wendy's best friend, but I'm not gonna make it awkward or anything." he assured.

'Dude, you have no idea how awkward it really is' Kenny thought to himself before considering his new debacle, does Kenny: A. Stop the lies dead in their tracks and come clean? B. Continue going behind his friend's back and lie until he gets caught? Or C. Say "I've gotta go take a shit.", stand up, then leave the room?

He went with C.

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"So what are you gonna wear on your date tonight?" Bebe asked quietly so not to disturb the rest of the study hall.

"Exactly what I'm wearing right now because it's not a date, he just invited me over to listen to some music. I do that with you sometimes." Wendy pointed out to her friend.

"Yeah, but I haven't totally been into you since preschool. Oh yeah, and remember back in preschool when I told you 'I think he likes you'? I freaking called it!" the other girl gloated.

"Okay fine, you were right. You're always right. Happy?" Wendy relented.

"I'll be happy when you're happy. Now tell me, does he make you happy?" Bebe questioned.

The girl smiled as she thought back to two days prior, "Saturday was the most fun I've ever had on a date, I would've been fine with just seeing a movie and grabbing some food. But then he took me to Stark's Pond and we just talked. I never just talked with Stan." she explained, "He said he wants to take me on a hike sometime."

"A hike? Who the hell goes on a hike?" the other girl asked.

"I do! Like, all the time! I asked you to come with me two weeks ago!"

"Oh yeah, that admiring the beauty of nature crap." Bebe remembered, "Aw, your new boyfriend's as much of a tree-fucking hippie as you!"

"For the last time he's not my boyfriend. Also, don't call me a hippie, that's what Cartman calls me."

"You can't deny what's inside Wendy." Bebe remarked in a rather poetic manner, "Especially when what's inside is your new boyfriend's huge throbbing co-"

"Stop!" Wendy interrupted.

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Kenny stood at the boys room sink, his hands shaking as he pulled down his hood and reached into his pocket for a joint, 'I've got my gun, if anyone gives me shit for it I can just kill myself.' he reasoned as he pulled the joint out and stuck it in his mouth, closed his eyes, lit it, and took a good inhale.

"Pass it." he heard Craig's monotonous voice say from his left.

Kenny choked on the smoke in surprise of the other boy's presence, "Jesus Fuck, dude!" he shouted through his coughing fit, still obliging his friend's request anyway.

Craig took a drag, holding it for a second before exhaling, "You seem kind of stressed today." he pointed out, passing the joint back to the other boy.

"Yeah, you could say that." Kenny lamented.

"Is it because you're afraid to tell Stan you're dating Wendy?"

The boy started coughing once again, "How the hell did you know that?!"

"I saw you two at the coffee shop, remember?"

"How do you know we weren't there as friends?"

"Because you just told me you're afraid to tell Stan you're dating Wendy."

Kenny paused for a second to think, "Shit." he cursed before passing the joint back to Craig.

"See, this is why I win when every time we play Guess Who. You always give away more information than you need to." the boy stated before taking his second drag and passing it back.

"Please don't tell Stan." the other boy begged.

"I wouldn't tell Stan anything, I hate him." Craig bluntly stated. "So, you and Wendy, huh?"

"You sound surprised."

"No, just curious." his friend corrected, "I never really took her for your type."

"Oh really? Then what is my-"

"Girls with big fat titties and deep vaginas, the kind that put out on the first date and are up for anything from oral to anal." Craig described.

Kenny paused to admire just how spot-on that description really was, "Dude, you're a seriously good listener." he complimented.

"Not like you make it easy with that fucking hood up all the time." the boy took one last drag before passing it back to his friend a final time, "So, how'd a nice girl like that end up with a degenerate like you anyway?"

Kenny took a hit from his joint, finally getting some of it into his lungs before telling his story "Well, after I spent fifteen years in a private South Korean prison, I got out and started my quest for revenge against whoever locked me in there. Shortly afterward I met Wendy and we instantly fell in love after I passed out eating a live squid." Kenny explained.

"That's the plot of Oldboy." the other boy pointed out.

"Yeah, but it still makes more sense than the truth. Hell, even I still don't entirely get what happened." the boy admitted as he extinguished his weed.

"Whatever, you're just lucky I'm the one who figured it out and not someone who can't keep a secret, like Butters or something."

It was when they heard one of the toilets flush that the two realized they weren't alone, one of the stalls opened to reveal a nondescript Douchebag who simply made the mouth-zipping motion and gave a silent thumbs up, prompting Kenny to sigh in relief.

"Man, I thought for sure that was gonna be Butters." Craig monotonously stated.

"Let's all just thank our respective gods that it wasn't." Kenny said as he checked the time on his phone, "Hey, I've got a date at six, you guys wanna cut out early and hang until then?"

"Okay." Craig agreed.

Douchebag gave what Kenny interpreted as an affirmative shrug before the three exited the bathroom.

Once the door was closed, the sound of shit hitting water echoed through the seemingly empty room followed by a stressed utterance of the phrase "Aw hamburgers, I knew I should've just waited to go at home."

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"He's really not taking it well, is he?" Wendy asked as she and Kenny laid side by side on his bed listening to Pink Floyd, fully clothed and over the covers because they're just friends.

"He never does. This happens every time you guys break up." Kenny explained, "I'm pretty sure the only reason he hasn't started hanging out with the goth kids again is because I started hanging out with them."

"You hang out with the goth kids?"

"Sort of." he answered "Me, Craig, and Douchebag sit out behind the school and smoke with them sometimes. They're pretty cool once you get used to them, they once told us we'd make good goths once we cut ourselves from the umbilical cord of conformity, which I'm pretty sure just means to start dressing in black."

"I think you'd look good in black." Wendy complimented.

"Alright cool, I was wondering if I would." Kenny admitted.

The two paused before getting back to their original topic, "Do you think I've been too hard on Stan?" the girl asked.

Kenny chuckled, "You said hard on." he pointed out, his brain constantly working overtime to find the immaturity in every conversation he can, "But no, I don't think so. The dude's got his priorities, and it's always been pretty clear to me that a relationship's not number one on that list."

"You think so?" Wendy asked, disappointed but not surprised.

"Maybe." he answered, "Maybe I'm just jealous and worried you might come to your senses about me and run back to him." the boy admitted, "At least I got you in bed before that happened."

"You didn't get me in bed."

"Oh really Wendy? Then what do you call this thing we're laying on, a sink?" the smartass countered.

"See, this is the exact conversation I was trying to avoid when I suggested we sit on the floor." the girl stated.

"Bed? Floor? I could rock your world no matter where we sit." Kenny said before remembering who he was talking to, "I mean, like in a classy way, with a rubber and shit. You know, because you're a classy chick. Fuck, do I sound sleazy?"

"Kinda." she answered, "If I didn't have such a crush on you then I might be a little creeped out." she admitted, 'Was that too much? Not enough? What's that look he's giving me? Oh shit, did I screw this up?'

'I thought I was supposed to be the bold one, what the hell's going on here?!' the boy thought to himself, "Was that an admission of guilt I just heard?" he asked, "Could it be that I, the dastardly Kenny McCormick, have charmed you after all these years of silent admiration?"

Wendy giggled "Maybe. Or maybe I'm just worried I might lose your attention and you'll run off with some girl with bigger tits." she teased.

"Trust me, I've had plenty of girls with bigger tits, and not one of them has managed to hold my attention nearly as well as you." Kenny shot back.

The girl nodded, "You're a real womanizer, aren't you?" she asked.

"I am an absolute whore, yes." the boy answered without the slightest bit of shame or hesitation.

"So how do I know I'm not just another one of your cheap thrills?"

"You don't." he answered with a shrug, "While we're on the subject, how do I know I'm not just some rebound crush you're using to distract yourself from Stan?" the boy instantly countered.

Wendy sat up in surprise, "It's not like that!" she defended.

"Alright."

The girl was surprised by how easily he believed her, "Alright?"

"Yeah, alright. I trust you." Kenny stated with a grin, "Granted, my judgment always goes to shit when I'm dealing with beautiful girls." he added with a wink.

Said beautiful girl couldn't help but blush at the compliment "Are you trying to fuck with me or something?" she asked, immediately regretting her choice of words when she saw the suggestive grin that appeared on the boy's face, "Don't give me that look, we are not fucking!" she affirmed.

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"THEY'RE WHAT?!" Stan furiously questioned.

"L-look Stan, I'm just tellin' you what I heard." Butters said, shocking his friends with the news he'd just shared.

"Heard where?!"

"I-in the bathroom, I heard him and Craig talkin' about it."

"No way Kenny would do that, he's not that kind of guy." Kyle stated.

"I'm tellin' the truth, cross my heart." Butters stated.

Finally, Cartman could no longer contain himself and burst out laughing, "HOLY SHIT DUDE, YOU GOT CUCKED!" he shouted.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP CARTMAN!" Stan demanded before returning his attention to Butters, "Dude, I swear to God, if you're fucking with me-"

"I'M NOT! Kenny's dating Wendy, I just thought you should know." the boy said.

"I can't believe he'd do this to me." Stan lamented in disbelief.

"Maybe there's another explanation for this." Kyle suggested, trying to comfort his friend.

"Kenny admitted to it and specifically told Craig not to tell you." Butters recounted.

"Are you guys seriously surprised?" Cartman asked "You know he sticks his dick in everything right?"

The mere suggestion of Kenny doing that with his girlfriend was enough to make Stan throw up right there on the sidewalk. "That fucking scumbag!" he cursed after blowing the contents of his stomach onto the concrete.

"Ew!" the rest of the group said in unison.

"I'm gonna kill him, I'm gonna fucking kill him!" Stan promised.

"Dude, killing Kenny isn't going to do anything aside from land you in jail." Kyle reminded.

"I don't care!" the boy countered, "How could he do this to me?! What kind of dick even thinks about dating his friend's ex?!" he furiously questioned before marching down the street.

"Where are you going?" Kyle asked.

"Where do you think?! I'm gonna go kick his ass!" Stan answered.

"Dude, you can't kick Kenny's ass!"

"Watch me!"

"No, seriously Stan, Kyle's right for once." Cartman admitted, "Kenny could totally beat the shit out of you."

"Nobody asked you, fatass!" Stan countered.

"I'm not fat, I'm BIG BONED!" Cartman corrected, "JUST LIKE THE BIG BONE THAT'S PROBABLY JAMMED UP YOUR HIPPIE BITCH EX-GIRLFRIEND'S FUCK-HOLE RIGHT NOW!" he added, only infuriating the other boy further as he made his way to the poor neighborhood.

Kyle turned to look at the heavyset teenager with contempt, "As clever as that was, you're a fucking asshole."

"Yeah." Cartman proudly agreed, "Yeah I am."

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Kevin McCormick pulled up in front of his house, his inebriated father in the passenger seat,
"Alright dad, we're home."

"I ever tell you 'bout how that Jerry Seinfeld bastard stole all my jokes for that show of his?" the drunken older man slurred.

Kevin sighed, "Yeah dad, twice on the way here." he answered.

"S'true." he stated, "Made a billions of dollars and I never saw a dime for it!"

"Come on, let's get inside." Kevin said as he got out of the truck and began helping his father to the front door. Out of the corner of his eye, the young man saw a figure emerge from the darkness in the form of a pissed off teenager approaching his house, "You think you can make it from here?" he asked.

"I can walk jus' fine." the older man answered as he stumbled into his home.

Kevin shut the door before addressing his visitor, "Hey squirt. What are you doin' here so late?" he asked.

"Where's Kenny?!" the boy asked in response.

"First off, watch the fuckin' attitude. Second, he ain't here right now."

"Then why's his truck here?!"

"It's dad's truck, 'least it will be once he gets his license back." the older boy responded, "What's your fuckin' problem anyway?"

"I just found out your brother's banging my girlfriend!" Stan answered.

'That's my little bro.' Kevin mused to himself, "Well like I said, he ain't here right now, and I don't appreciate you comin' on my property like you're some kinda tough guy. So hows about you fuck off. Ya know, unless ya really need to fight off some of that aggression." the older teen suggested, cracking his knuckles.

Now don't get him wrong, Stan was pissed beyond belief and ready for a fight, but even in his enraged state of mind he knew that Kevin could definitely kick his ass, and getting the shit kicked out of him for no reason just didn't seem like the best course of action, "Fuck this, I'll deal with him tomorrow." he said as he walked away.

"Smart move kid." Kevin laughed to himself before going inside to find his father passed out on the couch next to his little sister, "Hey Kevin." she greeted.

"Hey kiddo." he said in return, "Kenny home?"

The young girl nodded, "He's in his room with some girl."

"Oh is he now?" Kevin said with a grin, before making his way further into the house.

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"I mean, why not though?" Kenny asked, "You already came out and said you've got a thing for me." he pointed out.

"I just feel like it's kind of a big jump to take." Wendy expressed, "I mean, we only just started dating."

"Oh shit, we did? Kickass!" the boy exclaimed.

"Wait, no I-"

"Too late, you said it, now you're stuck with me!" Kenny reached under his bed and pulled out two bottles of soda, "Let's celebrate with a drink." he said before popping one of the caps off on his nightstand and taking a sip.

"First of all, I'm not drinking a bottle of Coke that says '2008 Olympics' on it." the girl declined.

Kenny spit the cola in his mouth back into the bottle, "Good call, this shit's flat." he said.

"Look, I just don't want to rush things, okay?"

The boy nodded, "Got it, that's totally cool, we can take this at whatever speed you want, no problem." he assured, "And just so we're clear, that means no naked bouncy time in the foreseeable future?"

"Please don't ever call it that again." Wendy begged, "And no, not for now. But..."

"Ooh, I do like butts!"

"Shut up." the girl instructed, she tried to think of the right words to say what she wanted to, "Screw it." were the only two that came to mind before she decided actions would speak far louder and collided her mouth with his, 'Why not? He already kissed me without warning.'

Kenny's mind went blank as instinct took over, 90% of said instinct he had to actively fight against for fear of overstepping their newly set boundaries. Still, if what he was feeling in this moment was any indication of things to come then it was worth the wait. Fuck huffing cat piss or any other dumb he tried to get high in the past, Wendy's lips gave him a high that no other drug could compare to, a paradise so sweet that he nearly cried when she finally pulled away. "Sfinte rahat, marita-ma." was all he could bring himself to say.

"What was that?" she asked.

The boy snapped back to reality, relieved that his little slip came out in a form she couldn't understand, "I'll tell you in English later." he promised.

The two stared at each other for a moment, the room was quiet and the pair had both come to the conclusion that they were having a moment.

A moment that would soon be shattered when the door to Kenny's room opened and his brother chucked a box of condoms at his head, knocking him right off the bed, "Don't forget to wrap it up Ken, we both know you can't afford a kid!" Kevin teased before turning to the shocked girl on the bed, "Damn, not bad! Welcome to the family gorgeous!" he shouted before shutting the door, leaving the pair alone once again.

"Kenny, are you alright?" Wendy asked in concern.

"Aside from a bruised ego, I'll be fine." he assured before spitting out some blood.

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"So I take it you're going out of your way to avoid Stan now?" Craig deduced before taking a hit from his friend's joint and passing it to Douchebag.

"What makes you say that?" Kenny asked.

"You got us to skip school and get stoned in the middle of the woods, something about that tells me you're trying to stay as far away from someone there as possible."

"Well maybe I'm just sick of all the plastic wannabe excuses for human beings that plague the halls of South Park High and I just wanted to get away for a while."

"You stole that line from Firkle." Douchebag pointed out as he handed Kenny the joint.

"Holy fuck, IT SPEAKS!" the boy sarcastically exclaimed before taking a drag.

"Since you're feeling chatty for once, can you please tell Kenny to put on anything besides Bloodhound Gang?" Craig requested.

"No." Douchebag bluntly answered before slightly turning up the volume on Kenny's boombox.

Kenny laughed as he handed Craig the joint, "Sorry dude, majority rules in favor of The Bad Touch."

"Speaking of the bad touch, how'd your date go last night?" Craig asked.

"Yeah, did you score or what?" Douchebag added.

"No Butthole, I didn't score." the boy admitted, "She said she wants to take it slow for now."

"Bummer." Douchebag responded as Craig handed him the joint.

"Honestly, I don't even mind. Like yeah, she's smoking hot and I seriously wanna fuck her brains out, but after so many girls where it's just fuck, bang, cum, screw, and that's it, it feels kinda cool to change it up like this… It feels more special, I guess." Kenny explained.

"That sounds pretty gay, not gonna lie." Craig stated.

"You're literally dating a guy." Kenny pointed out.

"Exactly. So when I say something's pretty gay, that means it's pretty fucking gay." the other boy explained, "Also, doesn't Wendy identify as a guy anyway?" he added.

"Dude, I seriously have no fucking idea, I completely stopped paying attention after season 18."

"Season 18 was when that plot-point happened." Craig reminded.

"Well season 18 fucking sucked! There was literally one joke about Stan's dad dressed in drag and it got completely hammered into the ground for ten fucking episodes, IT WAS BULLSHIT!" Kenny ranted.

"Dude, calm the fuck down and stop breaking the fourth wall."

"Fuck the fourth wall, just hand me the joint so we can end this fucking scene already."

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The goth kids sat in their usual spot behind the school, smoking cigarettes, listening to The Cure, and denouncing conformity. Ya know, like they do.

Suddenly, the door inside which they'd propped open with a math textbook was slammed open, revealing a furious Stan Marsh, hunting down the one who'd invoked his wrath, "Where is he?!" he demanded.

The tall goth (Who your friend and humble narrator now knows as Michael, thanks to the ever so helpful South Park Wiki) took a drag from his cigarette before addressing their intruder, "What the fuck are you talking about, conformist pig?" he calmly asked.

"Kenny! I know he comes out here to smoke, so where is he?!" the boy specified.

"Do we look like his fucking keepers?" Henrietta asked, "Maybe he's out sick or something, did you ever think of that? Or are you so caught up in your own self-worship that it slipped your mind?" she added.

The door opened once again to reveal yet another teenager, one that didn't realize just what she was walking into, "Hey have you guys seen Ken-" Wendy began to ask before noticing the presence of her ex-boyfriend, "-drick Lamar's new album? Pretty great right?" she finished with an awkward laugh, hoping the poor save would work.

"I already know." Stan expressed.

Wendy could feel a bead of sweat drip down her face, "That Kendrick Lamar is one of the best rappers of our generation?" she asked, losing all hope in her ability to bullshit her way out of this.

"Cut the crap Wendy! Butters told me you're dating Kenny!" the boy exclaimed.

'How the hell did Butters find out?' the girl wondered to herself, "Well, so what if I am? You realize we're not together anymore, right? I can date whoever the fuck I want!"

"So you admit you two are dating?!" Stan questioned.

Wendy thought about it for a brief moment before coming out with her answer, "Yeah, we're dating! So what?!" she exclaimed.

The boy grew even more infuriated at the admission, "Like, really dating? have you kissed yet?!" he pressed.

"Oh my god, are you serious?! Yeah, I kissed Kenny!"

"THAT BASTARD!"

"Hey, you don't get to talk about him like that!" Wendy chastised, "Maybe this didn't click with you for the whole… What was it, eight years we dated? But I'm my own person and I can be with whoever the fuck I want!" she proclaimed.

"Look, you don't date your friend's ex, that's the rule and Kenny knows it!"

"Well it's a stupid rule! What, you think you've got some kind of right to me just because you saw me first? Well newsflash asshole, Kenny tried asking me out before I even met you!"

"He-… He what?" Stan asked, not sure if he heard that right.

"And he didn't even throw up on me." she added, "I just wish I could understand what he was saying. Maybe then I wouldn't have wasted so much of my time with you!"

Stan was beyond pissed, "Fine! If that's how you really feel then we're fucking over!" he proclaimed.

"We've been over for weeks you fucking idiot! How do you not get this yet?!"

"Screw you!" the boy exclaimed with a flip of his middle finger before re-entering the school, kicking the book out of the door so everyone else would be stuck outside.

Michael couldn't keep himself from groaning, "He is such a fucking asshole!" he stated.

"I was kind of bummed out when he stopped hanging out with us, but I'm starting to think we dodged a bullet." Pete said (The Red Goth, thanks again South Park Wiki)

Wendy sighed before beginning her walk to the school's front entrance, hopefully she'd come up with a good excuse for how she got locked outside once she got back in, "Hey, Queen Conformity." she heard the female goth call her, "That was pretty goth, how you told him off like that." she complimented.

Wendy wasn't entirely sure how to respond to such a pleasantry, "Thanks?" she said.

"If you're still wondering where Kenny is, Douchebag texted us saying they were getting stoned in the woods with Craig." Pete explained.

'That's why he hasn't texted me back, he probably can't get any service.' the girl deduced, "Thanks for letting me know." she expressed with a smile.

"Cigarette?" Firkle offered, "It looks like you could use one."

Wendy shook her head, "I don't smoke, but thanks anyway." she politely declined, "Kenny was right, you guys are pretty cool."

"We don't need approval from a conformist like you." Michael stated, "But thanks, I guess."

The girl nodded in understanding before walking away.

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"Now Wendy, I really appreciate you doing this for me m'kay. You know I would never ask you to do this if it weren't important." the counselor thanked.

"It's no problem Mr. Mackey." she expressed.

"So, how do I look?" he asked, gesturing to his outfit that looked like it was more or less ripped straight off of John Travolta in Saturday Night Fever.

Wendy gave a thumbs up, "Really good." she said, holding back a bit of laughter.

"M'kay, just making sure since I've been out of the dating game for a while now and I'd hate to look silly." he explained, "Now, you know what to do, right?"

"File the papers alphabetically and don't look at their contents." she stated.

"Perfect!" Mr. Mackey said, "Alright, I'll leave ya to it. Wish me luck!" he said before sliding out of the room on his roller skates like the hip young soul he is.

Once her superior had left the room, Wendy let out the laugh she'd been holding in and got to work. The girl spent about ten minutes filing, really getting into the rhythm of her work before she heard a tap at the office window, snapping her out of her bureaucratic mindset "He wouldn't." she said to herself only to be answered by a second tap at the window, "Seriously? Does all his romantic expertise come from movies?" she questioned as she made her way to the window.

Wendy opened the second story window and looked down to where she expected to see her boyfriend, only to find the spot was completely vacant, "What's up hot stuff?" she heard his voice say from above her.

The girl shrieked in surprise before looking up to find the boy staring down at her from the roof, "What the hell?!" she exclaimed.

"Let me guess, you were hoping to see me in a leather jacket holding a boombox over my head?" he questioned with a wide grin on his face.

"What are you doing here?" she asked.

Kenny gestured for her to retreat into the room before dropping from the roof and grabbing onto the windowsill, pulling himself up to join her inside, "What? I wanted to see you." he said with a smile. "So, you're working for Mackey? What's up with that shit?"

Wendy rolled her eyes, "It's my volunteer work, you know, that thing we're all required to do before we can graduate?" she reminded.

"Oh yeah." the boy recalled as he took a seat on the counselor's desk, "That's fuckin' lame."

"Well whatever you think about it, we still have to do it, and just because everyone else is putting it off until senior year doesn't mean I can't get a head start." the girl stated.

"Hey, I'm not gonna get in your way. I just wanna look at my beautiful girlfriend for a while." he assured with a grin, "Now is that so wrong?"

"I guess not." she answered, hiding her blush from the boy.

"Sweet. So fill me in, does Mackey still keep weed in his office? Ya know, for educational purposes?" Kenny asked.

Wendy rolled her eyes once again, "No, he stopped doing that when he got fired, remember?" she reminded.

"Oh yeah, third grade was a hell of a year." the boy reminisced with a grin as he pulled out a joint and lit it.

"Hey! What the hell do you think you're doing?!" the girl questioned.

"Dude, chill. It's legal." Kenny assured with a grin.

"Not in a fucking elementary school!"

"Come on, what's the big deal?"

"Kenny, I swear, if you don't put that out right-"

"Look, I'll make you a deal," he interrupted, "I'll put it out if you take a hit."

"W-what?" Wendy asked.

"You take a hit, we both feel good for a few minutes, and Mackey will be overjoyed that you sprayed his office down with the sweet scent of air freshener. Everyone wins!"

"You're an idiot." she stated.

"I'm your idiot." the boy countered, "Come on, it's just one hit, then I'll be a good boy while I stare at you and think dirty thoughts." he promised with a grin.

The girl considered the offer, "Just one hit?"

Kenny nodded, "One hit and it goes out." he assured as he offered her the weed.

Wendy thought about it for a moment more before coming to her decision, "Fine, you win." she said as she took the joint in her hand and examined it.

Kenny watched as she raised the illicit item to her lips, he could've swore he heard some old heavy metal song ring out in his ears as the goddess before him took her first drag, "Holy fuck you're hot." he said as he lost himself in the sight of her.

Wendy coughed out the smoke in her lungs, partially due to her inexperience with having smoke in her lungs in the first place and mostly due to her boyfriend's remark, 'You're getting awfully comfortable with the B-word, aren't you?' she mentally asked herself before snapping back to reality, "Alright, a deal's a-"

The girl was interrupted when Kenny propelled himself into her face, kissing her much in the same way she'd done to him the night before, he decided his dealer had some explaining to do considering the girl was getting him higher than the weed ever did.

A/N: Here's a bit of trivia, this whole fic was written around one line I came up with, that line being "Oh my god, you fucked Wendy! YOU BASTARD!" and I'm kind of sad that I wrote myself into a position where I didn't get to use it. That said, I think the lines "Yeah, I kissed Kenny!"/"THAT BASTARD!" are a good variation in their own right. What do you think?

Also, if anyone else can come up with a good idea for a fic using the "Oh my god, you fucked Wendy" line, then feel free to use it, especially if it's for a Kendy fic, we need more of those on this website.

Anyways, let me know how you liked this chapter with a review, good or bad, any input is always appreciated.