Chapter 5


Missie was awake before dawn, pushing her covers aside as she glanced over at Ben and Adam. Both father and brother were still sleeping soundly, the fire having died down to only a few coals. Quietly she got up and stoked it with the remaining wood they had then picked up the kettle to fill it.

A gentle breeze blew as she walked down to the river, looking up at the stars as she filled the kettle. The North star shone brightly in the black sky, a couple clouds passing over the moon and cast long shadows on the ground. She made her way back to camp once it was filled then placed it over the fire to boil for coffee.

Ben and Adam were still sleeping and she smiled a little as she watched them from her seat next to the fire. Adam had his hands tucked up under his chin, reminding her of May. Out of all her siblings, May was the one she could say without a doubt she had been the closest too. Her smile faded upon the thought of her sister, the memories still only bringing pain to her heart. God, she missed them. She missed them dreadfully.

She got up again, slipping her pistol into her pocket and grabbed her knife then headed out into the darkness. If she were lucky she might catch a rabbit or two and surprise them with cooked rabbit for breakfast. Quietly she slipped through the underbrush as softly as an Indian, her lessons taught by Elizabeth learnt well. Her boots and skirts made no sound as she drifted further from camp in search of something to hunt. It was chilly now away from the fire but she had her coat on to keep her warm so she felt only half frozen.

The stars were starting to disappear when she finally came across a few unsuspecting rabbits grazing on a patch of grass. They were plump and fat too, the girls mouth watering at the thought of rabbit cooked over an open campfire. Slowly she crept closer. If she were careful she might be able to get two.

The rabbit grazing furtherest from the group was her first target, snuck up on it and grabbed it with her bare hands. Before it could alert the others she'd cleanly snapped it's neck and placed it on the grass to come back to and continued on to the next one. She almost missed but managed to catch it however, the other rabbits scurrying as she fell flat on her face with a fighting rabbit in hand. She stood back up and it was dispatched just as the other had been then she took inventory of her injuries. Apart from a bit of a rip in her skirt from a rock and a slight graze on her elbow she was just fine.

Missie breathed in deeply of the morning air as she went back to the other rabbits and picked it up, tying them together with some thick grass and slung them over her shoulder. With breakfast secured she started back to camp. She'd found some berry bushes on the way and so went past them to pick some to add to the meal.

Her father and brother were still asleep when she padded softly into camp another half hour later. The fire was burning brightly again and the water had boiled in her absence. Placing the rabbits and the berries she collected in her skirts aside she sat down and prepared herself a cup of coffee. Her hands were as cold as ice and the hot coffee helped warm them some before she set about skinning the rabbits. Once they were skinned and gutted they went onto the fire to cook.

The sun was just rising over the horizon when she settled down to eat some berries and finish off her coffee. She glanced over at Ben and Adam, her father stirring a little and she guessed he would wake soon. The smell of the roasting rabbit mixed with the rising sun was announcing it was time to wake up.

'Morning Pa.' She grinned when he finally sat up and rubbed his eyes, the girl pouring another cup of coffee. 'Coffee?'

He nodded as he got up stiffly from his bedroll and joined her beside the fire. 'How long have you been up?'

'Oh, couple of hours probably. Do you want some berries while the rabbit cooks?'

'I see you've been busy.' The rabbits hadn't escaped his notice, not with the sweet smell of them cooking. 'How did you get all this?'

Missie shrugged as if it were no big deal, which, to her, it wasn't. It wasn't nothing new for her to be able to make a meal just from what was around on the land. 'Came across some rabbits about half a mile from here and brought the berries back on my return. I hope you don't mind.'

'Mind? I'm impressed. You did well.'

She smiled a little, turning the rabbits on the spit over to roast the other side. 'Hopefully I'll do as well fishing today. If I can find a real shallow section of river I'd be able to catch fish easy my way.'

'I'm sure you'll get the hang of it.' He helped himself to a few more berries then looked back at her. 'Missie, I saw you carrying your pistol last night.' The girl froze, her eyes watching him carefully. 'Now, if you were one of my son's I'd be tanning your hide but I'm going to allow you a chance for an explanation.'

'I'm sorry, I should have asked you.'

'Yes, you should have.'

'Pa let me start carrying one on the ranch when I was ten-' She refused to look at him as she explained, instead staring into the fire. 'For times when a rifle wouldn't have been able to be gotten out quick enough. He said I was doing the work of a man and I was old enough for the responsibility. He made sure I could use it though before he let me wear it, I had lessons about how to clean it and such. Pa said when a person straps on a gun they take on the responsibility they might have to use it one day. He drilled that into me thoroughly. I had to use it too, when I tried to stop those men. I carry it because I know what dangers there are out here and I'm no stranger to them. Wild animals and rattlesnakes and the two legged variety to boot too. I don't shoot if I don't need to, Pa taught me it's best to try and talk to resolve problems rather then do it by the gun. He also taught me if needed to do it by the gun do it well enough so you're still standing.' She paused for a moment then looked up at him, trying to read his expression. 'I hope your not angry with me.'

'I'm not angry with you.' He chose his words carefully trying to think of the best way to handle the situation. 'I think your Pa had great confidence in you to entrust you to wearing a pistol. He knew what you were capable of and had faith in you. I on the other hand still am only just getting to know you. While I'm not going to take your gun away once this camping trip is over I'm going to give you the same talk as I have the boys before I let them carry. You'll also have to prove you can shoot and use a handgun safely. Does that sound reasonable to you?'

Missie nodded. 'It does Pa. I was going to speak with you about it before you found out but I just couldn't get up the courage to talk to you about it. Most folks have a set idea of where a girl or woman should be and I just didn't know how you'd react. I'm sorry.'

'I accept your apology but I do wish you had come spoken to me about it. You trust me, don't you?'

'Of course I do Pa.' She looked back at the fire. 'I just was scared how'd you react.'

'I understand. I hope you'll come to be comfortable enough to come talk to me about things.' He continued softly. 'I'd really like to work on having a relationship with you. I'm still figuring out how to parent you and such and we're all still only just getting to know you.'

'It's big changes for all of us, I know.' She glanced over at Adam who was still soundly asleep. 'I bet they didnt count on having someone like me tagging along.'

'I know all three of them are royally fond of you, especially Adam.'

'I just don't want them to become resentful of me.' She turned the rabbit over once more and looked it over carefully. Another half hour or so and it would be cooked. 'I know I didn't like having my younger siblings along all the time. I just want to be sure that I'm not bothering them.'

'I'm sure they would tell you if you were.'

'I guess so. I just don't want to cause any trouble.'

'You're not causing trouble my dear, far from it. We all love having you around, you have my word on that.' He placed his arm around her and she scooched over closer to him, resting her head against him. 'Sure, it's an adjustment and it is different having a young lady around the place but you've brought something special and beautiful into our lives.'

'And what would that be?'

'You.'

Missie chuckled a little at the compliment. 'You're just saying that because your my Pa now. Every Pa things his girl is something special.'

'That might be true but you most certainly are special. Take the little things you do for instance. Mending our clothes-' He motioned at the fire. 'Cooking breakfast and everything else you do, extra above what we ask of you. You like helping those around you.'

'I do. I like doing things to show people I care about them.'

'And that's part of what makes you special, what you hold in here.' He tapped her coat above her heart. 'You have a heart made of gold.'

'I surely hope not-' She teased. 'Someone might want to strike it rich.'

'Who's striking it rich?'

'Well, good morning to you too, Mr. Sleepy Head.' She teased as Adam sat up and brushed his hat off before putting it back on his head. 'Pa and I were just talking about what makes me special. He rekons I've got myself a heart of gold.' Adam chuckled as he stood up and she poured him a cup of coffee. 'Coffee?'

'You're an angel.'

'I know I am.'

He took the cup, taking a sip as she smiled broadly. 'How come your so chipper this early?'

'Cause I'm out in beautiful country with a gorgeous sunrise and have two of my favorite people here to share it with me.' She leaned back against Ben, content in the safety of his string arms. 'There's nothing I like more then spending time with my family.'

'I couldn't agree more.' Ben kissed her head softly. 'There's nothing more precious then family.'

'While you two are being sentimental-' Adam interrupted, his stomach grumbling loudly at the smell of the cooking rabbit. 'I'd like to know Pa when breakfast will be ready.'

'You'll need to ask Missie, she's the one who's prepared all this.'

'Missie?'

She nodded. 'While you two were still asleep I was off looking for something for us all to eat. The rabbit will still be a little longer but I've got berries here you can have in the meantime.'

'How'd you get away without us noticing?'

Missie shrugged. 'Same way I got away from my father, stelth. Elizabeth used to say I was Indian in spirit because I learnt so quickly and so well the ways of her people. She taught me everything I know of being out here in the wilderness. These rabbits I caught by sneaking up on them and grabbing them. I know a lot of things Adam, but fishing the white mans way isn't one of them. We'd be starving right now if I tried to catch fish for breakfast.' She got up to turn the food again and glanced into the kettle. 'I'll go get some more water to boil.'

'Be careful.' Ben cautioned automatically out of habit, the girl chuckling as she headed down the riverbank. ' That one's going to make the rest of my hair turn grey.'

'From the looks of it, it already has.' He quipped, his father shooting him a look of unammusement as he placed his empty cup on the ground. 'You speak to her about the pistol?'

'I did.'

'And what did you decide?'

'For the moment she can keep it, her father entrusted her to carry and I trust his judgement from the evidence of how she's been raised. I did inform her however that we'd be having a serious talk and she'd also have to show me she can shoot.'

'I think that cougar she got is hard proof she can handle a gun.'

'Handguns and rifles are two different kinds of responsibility Adam, you know that.'

He nodded. He could still hear his father's words in his mind when he was given a pistol to carry for the first time. 'I am aware of that.'

'If I don't think Missie is up to the responsibility I will put her gun away until she is older.'

'Is it right for her to be carrying one anyway? After all, she's still only a child.'

Ben shrugged, glancing down at the girl kneeling at the waters edge. 'You and I both know she's no ordinary girl. She's had it hard-'

'Yes, I know that. What I'm saying is does she need to carry one? Once the novility of running with us men wears off she'll end up inside the house anyway.'

'Adam, I have a feeling that like it or not, Missie is going to be pushing her way into every aspect of running this ranch. She's more man then some I know that call themselves that. If you were in her position, living her life, what would you be doing?'

He was silent for a few moments to think and slowly it began to dawn on him. 'Probably the exact same thing as what she's doing.'

Ben nodded as he watched the girl start back up to camp. 'Missie's trying to find her footing, find her way. Within reason there's no reason to stop her from doing what she wants to do. She's not being rebellious, she's just trying to learn where she fits in this new world she finds herself a part of. I can't be too harsh on her Adam, she's had more then her share of punishment in her lifetime. When I brought up the fact to her I knew about her pistol she was like a skittish dear, afraid of being hit. She's learning to trust I won't hurt her but I need to be careful I don't break that trust. Especially after that time at the corral. I'm just lucky she's got a forgiving nature or it could have turned out a lot differently.'

'Would you know there were three trout there teasing me?' She exclaimed upon her return, hanging the kettle back over the fire. 'They knew I didn't have anything to catch them with.'

'I'm sure you'll have better luck today.' Adam encouraged, helping her to make another lot of coffee. 'After breakfast we'll see if your luck might change. I know a perfect little spot downstream.'

'Sure.'

'Pa can teach you though, you might have better luck with a better teacher.'

'Oh you aren't a bad teacher. You've got me reading now, haven't you?' She glanced up at the sky, reading the weather. 'We might get a storm this afternoon.'

'Are you sure Missie? Looks too fine a day for there to be a storm.'

'I just know these things, wether you choose to believe me or not that's up to you. Me on the other hand, I'll be fashioning myself some kind of shelter. I don't like getting wet.' She checked the meat over carefully, smiling in satisfaction as she saw it was ready. 'Alright gentlemen, I hope your hungry. Breakfast is ready.'


The day had warmed up considerably as Missie sat on a rock overhanging the river, swinging her feet in the water. They'd spent the morning fishing, she'd finally managed to catch a couple under Ben's instructerful care and they'd had themselves a good meal. Ben and Adam both had chosen to stay in camp after they'd eaten, Ben fast asleep under a tree while Adam read a book he'd brought. She'd chosen to come dip her feet in the water to cool off from the hot summer sun. There were a few clouds starting to appear in the sky, yes, there was a storm coming in but the girl hadn't noticed just yet, being preoccupied with her thoughts.

She smiled a little, thinking of her new family as she watched the water rushing by. Ben really was trying to build a relationship with her, she could still feel his hands on hers helping her get the hang of fishing. He was so patient and gentle with her but she had a feeling she was the exception to that rule. Ben had an air about him of leadership and boldness, an air that spoke clearly not to get on his bad side. He was no pushover, she knew that. It made her feel safe in the knowledge that he was there as the protector of the family. She was growing to really like him, her heart eating up the love and care he showed her.

The sun was awfully hot on her skin and she stood up, picking up her boots and started upstream to find some shade. She knew not to go too far from camp, she'd left her pistol back there so it wouldn't get wet on accident. Knowing that Ben wasn't angry with her was a huge relief off her shoulders. While she knew he was disappointed she hadn't told him she was thankful he hadn't taken it from her. Aside from Lilly, her pistol and knife were the only things from her life before. They were part of who she was.

A tree next to the river up ahead looked mightly inviting and she quickened her pace. The riverbank had been washed out by an early spring flood, the girl not noticing that the bank was unstable where she was walking. She hummed a little tune as her bare feet padded softly over the dirt then suddenly as she stepped forward again the ground gave way beneath her.

She screamed as she fell, her mouth and lungs filling with water as she went under. Thrashing wildly she made for the surface, gasping for air as she tried to stay above the water. The current was washing her downstream, it wasn't too strong but for a girl who couldn't swim and was panicking it was more then enough to threaten to take her to a watery end.

Water was coming into her mouth and lungs more then air as she struggled frantically, unable to scream for help or think rationally in her terror. All she knew was that she didn't want to die, she was fighting, fighting for her life.

The water pulled her under again, the girl having run out of strength to stay afloat. She struggled for the surface with every thing that she had but it wasn't enough as she began to sink lower into the darkness depths. Her lungs burned and screamed for air but water was all she could breath in. Desperation drove her to try one last time but she couldn't keep her head above water. No, no! Her chest was burning as more water entered her lungs, the water about her turning black as she lost the fight for consciousness...