Daisy froze. She felt her breath catch as the uninvited guy leered at her and then winked. For a second, she was back there. Back at the house. The house that had him in it. She saw everything clearly. She could even smell him. Smell the booze on his breath and the oil on his clothes.
"Me and you. You know you want it babe. Everyone does."
She heard voices that seemed a million miles away. Some were shouting. "Get out of here Ward. "Leave her alone asshole." "Get your hands off her you maggot."
She heard laughter and he spoke again. "Fuck off you losers. The girl's too pretty to be hanging at the misfit table." His grip on her arm tightened.
Then Daisy heard screaming. She lashed out feeling her hand connect with flesh and continued to flail and strike out at anything near her. Things flew to the floor as she jumped out of her seat knocking over her chair and then she fell to the ground and circled her arms around her body. She began to rock back and forth. In the distance she heard scuffling feet as the cafeteria started buzzing with noise as everyone seemed to be talking and moving at once. The last thought she had before the full-blown panic attack set in, was that the voice that was screaming was her own.
Daisy woke up on a cot. She heard muffled voices talking nearby and then she sat up. Too fast. She sat up too fast. She held her head and looked around the room as it was spinning. She spotted a blurry Phil a few feet away talking to someone. Their backs were to her. She called out to him in a scratchy voice. "Phil?"
He moved quickly to stand by the cot. "Hey sweetheart. How are you? It's okay."
"No, it's not. Where's Melinda? Did you call her?"
"I did. She's on her way. I'm sorry. You're right. It's not okay. What I meant was that you're safe here. It's just me and the school nurse."
Daisy nodded. "Did – did anyone give me meds?"
"No. You passed out for a little bit, came to, and then you fell asleep about twenty minutes ago."
"Yeah. That's what happens on the bad ones. The worst ones. One of my shrinks said my mind just shuts down and my body follows. How long was I passed out?"
"About five minutes from what I can tell." The school nurse, Ms. Temple spoke quietly to her. She moved closer to her. "Is it okay if I take your vital signs Daisy? Only if you feel comfortable."
Daisy nodded. "Okay. But no drugs."
"No drugs. Just going to take your pulse, your blood pressure, oxygen level and look you over for injuries."
"Okay."
"Are you okay with your dad staying in the room?"
She looked over at him. "Yeah. I'd like him to stay." She reached for his hand which her took and she looked him in the eye. "Please stay."
"Of course. I'm not going anywhere."
Ms. Temple performed the vitals tests and did a quick once over, looking for injuries. After a few minutes she paused and spoke to Daisy. "You have a bruise on the underside of your hand and one here on your lower arm. Do you feel any pain from them?"
Daisy shook her head. "No."
Ms. Temple looked over at Phil. "They are minor. She appears to be okay Phil. If you want, you could take her to a doctor to get checked out, but I don't think it's necessary. Probably best to just take her home, keep her calm and let her get some rest." She looked at Daisy. "You should just take it easy for the rest of the night. Phil told me you have occasional panic attacks. This one happened because you were triggered. But you should be fine. If you get any sick symptoms, or pain, you should tell Phil and go to the doctor. Okay?"
She nodded still grasping hold of Phil's hand.
"Oh and there are a bunch of kids out in the office area who are worried about you. Maybe Phil could go talk to them? Tell them that you're okay?"
Daisy looked up at Phil with surprise. "Who?"
"Nat. Carol. Sara. Miles and Mike. None of them would leave."
"Oh. How come?"
"They're worried about you. Nat wanted to come in here. I told her that she needed to give you space. She wasn't happy about it."
"They saw."
"They did. You want to know what happened? I got the whole story from Nat. She said Grant Ward triggered your attack. She said he put his hands on you and made threatening remarks. Apparently, after you – after you smacked him in his nose, and fell to the ground, Roy jumped over the table and confronted him and Ward hit him first, and Roy stood his ground and fought back. Ward got the worst of it. The vice principal took them both to his office. That's where Trip is now too. All the kids had to go to the office one at a time to tell what happened."
"How'd I get here?"
"Trip. He picked you up and carried you here. Sara ran to get me." Phil answered.
"What's going to happen now?"
"Well now we go home. I'm sure that you'll have to tell the vice principal what happened, but that can wait."
"Everyone saw."
"Most people had no idea what happened. Trip picked you up and brought you here. All that most people know was there was a fight. The story will get changed many times, and it'll all die down in a few days."
"Good thing it's Friday. It would totally suck to have to come back here tomorrow."
"Yup." Phil smiled watching her regain some of her spunk. She did seem to bounce back quickly. But he also knew from what Melinda had been saying, that she also kept things buried deep inside allowing them to fester while putting on a brave front. "It's okay to not be okay."
She looked at him and smiled. "Melinda says that."
"Who do you think taught me?" He winked at her. She laughed.
There was a loud commotion in the outer room and then the door burst open as Melinda charged into the room. She stopped at the foot of the cot staring at Phil and Daisy who were laughing.
Daisy noticed her disheveled appearance, imagining that she broke every traffic law to get there, and she flashed her a huge grin. "I'm not okay," she cheerfully stated.
Phil smirked. Melinda looked back and forth at Daisy and Phil. Her expression was one of puzzlement.
"She moved to the other side of the cot. "Did you hit your head?"
Daisy's grin turned into a full-blown laugh. Then she spoke matter-of-factly "None of us is okay and that's okay."
Melinda brushed her hand gently against Daisy's face. Then she tapped her lightly on the nose. "How are you?"
"I'm safe. No pain. And they didn't give me meds. It was a bad one Melinda."
Melinda nodded. She looked at Phil. "You two want to fill me in on what happened?"
Ms. Temple then spoke. "I'm going to get all the paperwork done, and after that you can sign off on her release and take her home. I'll tell the kids outside what's going on. Tell them to give you all some room and space and to call you later, okay Daisy?'
She gave her a thumbs up.
"Thank you, Claire. For everything." Phil smiled at her.
"I'll see you in a few minutes."
Melinda closed the door and walked out to the kitchen. She sat down at the counter and took the offered cup of tea from Phil. "Thanks. She just wants to be alone for a little while. Said she might take nap. I don't think we're going to be heading over to the house tonight Phil."
"Yeah I figured. Hey, I can take a load with me now. If you want."
"Sure. Those boxes over there have videos and books. A few have some shoes and purses."
"Hey. Stop worrying. She's fine now Mel. I think she's more worried about her friends seeing her having a panic attack then the actual attack."
"If he was over eighteen, I'd kick his ass."
"You'd have to get behind me. Remind me to buy Roy something. Maybe a gift card?"
"According to Carol this Ward character got the worst of it. We can take Roy out to dinner too."
"I'm just glad Trip and Nat were there and held it together so they could get Daisy to the nurse quickly."
"He's going to be expelled, isn't he?"
"I don't know Mel. His parents have money. He's been in trouble a number of times and he always comes back."
"Who are his parents?"
"Robert and Janet Ward. Old money. Real estate and finance."
"Well I can beat them up then. They're adults."
"Melinda."
"Maybe we should press charges against him?"
"What charges would stick?"
"Intimidation. Assault. Criminal threat."
"You really think one of those would stick? They'll chalk it up to teen hormones and school yard misunderstandings. Especially considering Roy jumped in. We could put him in danger to be charged as well."
"The school better punish his ass then."
"They will. He's a senior. By next May he's gone."
"Phil if I get wind that he goes near her again, I will pay him a visit. I don't care how old the jerk is."
"Again. You'll have to get in line if that happens."
"She said this panic attack was one of the worst she's ever had. I asked her about the trigger for it and she refused to say any more." Melinda took a deep breath to calm down. "Maybe this jerk Ward should be told that Daisy's aunt and uncle are police officers with a lot of friends? We could bring Mack along. And then also remind him that her mom is an FBI agent with five black belts in various martial arts. Oh and we can throw in the fact that both her parents are highly trained in all kinds of weapons. I could get a Katana."
"Where would you get... never mind. Melinda we can't threaten a minor."
"Okay. I'll wait till he turns eighteen then."
Phil laughed. "Your mamabear is strong tonight. Has Daisy seen that side of you yet?"
"She has." Daisy interrupted.
Melinda and Phil both turned their heads toward Daisy who continued to walk to the fridge.
"It's very endearing. But I would rather not have to visit you in jail." She took the chocolate milk she had pulled out of the fridge and grabbed a glass and poured a drink. She took a swallow and then looked at them both. "Cause I may not be okay, but I would be very much less okay if one of you guys wasn't here."
Melinda went to speak but Daisy raised her hand, took another swig of chocolate milk and then spoke again. "Yeah this whole thing today sucked ass. But it made me see – see things – see more clearly. I've been thinking on stuff and it's kind of deep stuff. For a while I was just – I just didn't know how – how to deal – how that all worked and stuff. Seeing little me with you both in those photos, remembering those boots, I just – I've wanted – wanted to – I saw – before I saw this little kid, the one in your belly as not me – as some random little kid that was your kid. But Skye – she's not some random kid – she's me. I'm her. Then today how you were there for me, both of you. Your entrance when you came to school today and Phil's words and it just – well today, yeah - today I – I wanted – I - today I realized you're my mom, Melinda. And you're my dad, Phil. And I love you both."
Daisy had just enough time to set down her glass before she was engulfed in a sandwich hug from Melinda and Phil. She gave a little laugh as she allowed them to squeeze her tightly. She looked at Phil who had tears in his eyes, and she felt Melinda stroke her back. She sighed and closed her eyes. She finally was home.
Melinda grabbed a box and followed Daisy into the house. They had brought half of their stuff from Melinda's and this was the seventh and last trip to her SUV. Bobbi and Hunter were also at the house, they had helped Phil bring over some of his items. The living room and dining room furniture has been delivered yesterday. Bobbi had come to the house on her lunch break to allow them entrance. The bedroom furniture was supposed to arrive by noon today.
Daisy set the boxes of books down in the living room and then plopped down on the new couch. She whined." It's too early for manual labor."
Melinda laughed as she placed her box next to the others. "It's already seven o'clock. Look the sun's starting to rise."
Hunter walked by to go get more boxes from his truck. "I'm with her. It's not only early but it's bloody cold outside. I guess we are getting winter after all." He continued out the door.
"Supposed to snow tomorrow." Daisy frowned as she said it.
"Snow's fun."
"Nothing's fun at seven in the morning on a Saturday Melinda. absolutely nothing."
"We should have done Tai Chi. Get the blood flowing."
"You're a sadist. I had to get up at five to finish packing up and we could only get half the stuff in your SUV, so we still have to go back and walk all those boxes to the parking garage and then come back here and bring them all into the house. Not to mention there's about a zillion boxes and bags all over this house and I nearly died tripping over that big one over there three times now."
Melinda shook with laughter at Daisy's theatrics. "Come on. Shake a leg. Let's get these to my room so they are out of the way. We can pile them in the closet and along the one wall so the furniture delivery people can get the furniture in the rooms. Then we can go back to the apartment and get the rest, and then you and I will have most of our stuff here."
Daisy groaned but got up and grabbed a box of books. "Remind me how much I hate this when I groan about my schoolwork. I need to get good grades, cause I want a cushy office job where I can sit all day and not lift shit."
It was six o'clock and Daisy was officially on strike. Everyone knew it because she kept telling them.
"I'm officially on strike,' she reminded them again. "It's a no more carrying shit strike."
Melinda laughed and Phil grinned. Daisy was sprawled out on the lounge chair upside down as Melinda and Phil were stacking boxes into piles based on what rooms they belonged in. Most of the boxes were Phil's with a few of Melinda's mixed in. The bedroom furniture had arrived before noon, and the bedrooms were at least sleep ready. Melinda had made her and Daisy's beds so they could stay and sleep in them. Everything else was a huge mess which Daisy liked to remind them of.
"Everything's a huge mess." She said for them again, as she sighed dramatically.
Bobbi wandered into the room and grinned at her niece. "You know you could help make it less of a mess, instead of lying there whining.
"But I'm really good at it. Besides I'm supervising. Cause I ain't lifting no more shit. Nada. Zilcho. And I'm starving. Where's the food? Didn't your husband leave like an hour ago?
"Twenty- minutes Daisy. He'll be here soon."
"I hope so. I'm starving."
"Yes. You made that quite clear for the last hour."
"Well my metabolism kicks in high gear when I gotta lift shit all day. Not my fault."
"You could use a better vocabulary Dais. Shit gets old."
"Hah. I see what you did there Melinda."
"I mean shit happens." Melinda smirked at her.
"Life can be a shit storm." Bobbi added with grin.
Daisy grinned. "You guys are being shitty now."
"Don't lose your shit Daisy." Bobbie was having a blast now.
"UhOh. Shit just got real." Melinda added quickly.
"The maturity level in this room just dropped 50 points." Phil chastised all of them.
"Ha. Phil thinks his shit don't stink."
He turned and glared at his ex-wife. "You're contributing to this show of immaturity Melinda."
"Don't you mean this shit show of immaturity, Phil?" Daisy couldn't resist.
"Actually, I think she's the one who started this shit, Phil." Bobbi's grin was wide now.
"Yeah Phil. Look at that shit eating grin on her face." Daisy barely got out between fits of laughter.
Melinda giggled. Daisy was full out laughing now, along with Bobbi.
"Yeah well. I'm leaving." He walked away a few steps with a box in his hands heading to the basement door, turned around and said, "I don't need this shit."
The three howled with laughter.
Daisy stole more fries off Melinda's plate. She shoved them in her mouth. She'd already eaten her own burger and fries.
Melinda noticed and just slide her plate closer to Daisy.
"We're going to head home Phil." Bobbi stood as Hunter downed the rest of his beer. "We'll be back tomorrow in the morning. You want us to bring breakfast?"
"Nah. I brought food from my place and have eggs and cheese so I can make omelets." He turned to Melinda. "Although I will have to get groceries tomorrow. I'll do that before everyone arrives. Then Hunter and Mack and I can get the rest of my stuff at my apartment. So, on second thought, yeah could you bring something for Mel and Daisy?"
"Sure thing. Those breakfast platters okay? The ones from McDonalds?"
"That's fine. Anything's fine Bobbi."
"With a caramel machiotto?" Daisy asked.
"Sure Daisy. I can do that."
Daisy smiled.
Daisy laid awake. She was in her new bed, in new sheets and blankets, in her new room at her new house with her new parents. Melinda was across the hall in her own room, and Phil was in his bedroom downstairs. She picked up her phone again and saw it was nearly one o'clock. They'd all been tired and had retired to their bedrooms at ten-thirty, but Daisy had been unable to fall asleep. She turned over to her other side and closed her eyes. After ten minutes of telling herself to sleep, she sat up on the bed and switched on the light on her nightstand. She pulled her legs up and wrapped her arms around them and looked at the door. Finally, she made a decision.
She got out of bed, and walked to the door, going into the hallway, and then stood outside Melinda's bedroom door. She put her ear to the door listening. She reached for the doorknob and turned it quietly. It wasn't locked. She pushed the door open halfway and then snuck around the door shutting it behind her and leaned against the now closed door. She waited till her eyes adjusted to the dark, and then sought out Melinda. Melinda had placed her bed in the middle of the far wall, and Daisy could see her sleeping under her new purple and white comforter.
"Melinda," she whispered.
"Come here Daisy."
"How'd you know it was me?"
"I can see you and you whispered."
"I didn't want to wake you."
"I used to be a spy Daisy. Are you staying?"
"That would be weird, right? I have my own room now."
"You get used to things. It's okay to want things to stay the same. It's okay to want to be near people."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah."
"I never had a place I could run to when I was scared before."
"You do now." Melinda paused for a second. "What are you scared of?"
"Having a nightmare. And being alone. Having a nightmare alone."
"So don't be alone."
"I should go. Just talking made me feel better."
"Okay. Whatever you want to do. Try to sleep. Goodnight."
Daisy hesitated. She wrapped her hand on the doorknob behind her and watched Melinda. Then she let go and ran to the bed and jumped on it. "Maybe just tonight." She wiggled into the blankets and laid on her side staring at Melinda. "I never had this before. I never felt safe enough to have this before."
"Go to sleep Daisy. I'll always keep you safe."
Daisy nodded and cuddled into Melinda who wrapped her arms around her daughter.
"You always smell like you too. It's comforting." Daisy mumbled.
"What do I smell like?" Melinda asked amused.
"I dunno. Vanilla maybe. Sometimes lavender. Cinnamon. Sometimes spicy. But in a good way not a yucky way spicy."
"Hmmm. You're a little weird, you know that Daisy?"
"I know."
"I think weird is a good thing."
"Me too. Everything about all of this is weird. But also good."
"Also very good. Normal is highly overrated."
"Yeah." Daisy settled in and her breathing became slower. She whispered, "this is what home feels like."
Melinda tightened her grip on Daisy and watched her as she drifted off to sleep. She whispered back, "Yes my sweet girl. This is what home feels like.
Sunday morning into the early afternoon was mostly a repeat of Saturday. They moved boxes to rooms, opened and put away much of it to its rightful place. Mack and Hunter helped Phil move most of the rest of his stuff from his apartment leaving only a few things he could move when he had the time. He had till the end of the year, as his landlord was letting him out of his lease a few months early because Phil had found a tenant to take over the apartment. Bobbi had been helping Melinda and Daisy put kitchen wares, books, Dvd's and clothing away.
Mack, Hunter and Bobbi left after a quick pizza lunch. Daisy, Melinda and Phil were still sitting at the new dining room table, Melinda and Daisy with cups of tea and Phil with his coffee.
"We should do something. Get away from the unpacking for a couple hours."
Both Melinda and Daisy turned to look at Phil.
He continued. "Something active and fun."
Melinda raised her eyebrows at him. "Active is the definition of what we've been all weekend Phil."
Daisy nodded in agreement. "I'm all for fun, Phil, but honestly that active part is a no from me. "
"You didn't even hear what I had in mind. Skating. Ice Skating."
They both looked at him. Daisy's look was puzzled while Melinda's was annoyed.
"No I mean think about it. It's fun. It's active but not overly active. We can get hot chocolate after."
"I don't know how to skate Phil."
"I know. But we can teach you."
Melinda folded her arms and rolled her eyes.
"Okay. I mean Melinda can teach you and I can show you how to fall without hurting yourself."
Daisy laughed at his correction. "I don't know. Maybe we could just chill here. Or go see a movie. That'd be fun. And a lot less active."
His face showed momentary disappointment, but he then smiled. "Sure. What movie you have in mind?"
Daisy shrugged. "Or we could go skating, I guess. I 'd like to see just how good Melinda really is."
His face lit back up.
Melinda gave her an encouraging smile. "You sure?"
"Yeah. But I get two hot chocolates – with whipped cream out of the deal. I guess you rent skates, right? But I don't know what to wear."
"Come on. I'll help you find something." Melinda led the way to the bedrooms.
"It's not too crowded today." Phil said. He had his skates on and was waiting for Melinda to help Daisy lace hers up.
"There we go." Melinda said and she stood. She offered Daisy a hand. Daisy held tightly as they made their way to the rink entrance. "So we'll stay over on this side, this area here to our right seems to be where the beginners are all congregated. I'll go on the ice first and then you hold my hands and just kind of glide on the ice, okay?"
Daisy nodded and then shook her head. "I don't think this is a good idea. What was I thinking? I am not good at sports and stuff Melinda."
"Hey. I won't let go, okay? Just give it a try. You made it this far."
"Yeah."
"Ready?"
Daisy nodded and Melinda stepped onto the ice and gently guided Daisy out onto the ice holding her hands. Melinda was skating backwards, and pulled Daisy over to the right, going very slow.
"You're skating backwards." Daisy said and then she stumbled a bit, but Melinda held her up and gave her an encouraging smile.
"We're going to go a little faster now and I want you to focus on how the ice feels, how your balance feels."
Daisy looked at her with trusting eyes and nodded. Melinda led her around a number of times letting her glide over the ice and get comfortable. Then she stopped and taught her how to balance and feel the blades on the ice, and how to distribute her weight over the skates. After a good forty-five minutes, Daisy could stand up on the skates and move forward cautiously as long as Melinda stayed by her side. Melinda led her to the snack tables and Phil joined them. He bought Daisy and himself hot chocolate with whipped cream.
Melinda skated off as Phil sat at the small table. He grinned at Daisy and sat the drinks on the table. "How you like it?"
"It's scary. And I feel kind of dumb when the little kids skate past me. But it was fun too."
"Good. You know one of the most fun I have while skating?"
"What's that?"
"Watching Melinda skate. She's in the middle of the rink." He gestured to where Melinda was doing a sit spin.
"Whoa!" Daisy looked over and grinned. "She was really a champion way back huh?"
"She was."
Melinda rose out of the sit spin and set off building some speed. She did a single toe jump and Daisy's eyes lit up. Melinda looked over at them and smiled. Then she set off again and skating backward took off on her back skate and executed a perfect jump landing with a huge smile on her face. A couple next to Daisy seemed impressed.
"Who is that?"
"My mom." Daisy answered. "That's my mom. She used to be a junior champion."
The older couple smiled at her. The woman spoke, "seems she hasn't lost her step. That was an impressive jump."
Daisy grinned. "Yeah, she's amazing."
"So nice to see a young person who respects and appreciates their parents." The man added. They smiled at Phil. "You raised her well sir." With that they got up and left the snack area.
Phil didn't say anything. Melinda had skated over and got Phil's attention. "Come on out here Phillip." He looked at Daisy who spoke, "go ahead. I haven't seen you skate yet."
He got up and mumbled. "More like falling. You can watch and learn how to fall with grace." He winked at her.
Daisy laughed and he made his way to the rink. Melinda took his hand and they skated away. Daisy watched them and thought about what the man had said. You raised her well, he had said. Trouble was they hadn't raised her at all. And that was a damn shame, cause it would have been amazing. They'd missed out on so much. She'd missed out on so much. Yet now they were doing their best. Melinda had taught her to skate. No she was not an expert after one time, but she had stayed mostly upright and had really skated by herself for a few feet a few times. She watched them now as Melinda built up speed and as they passed by her, Phil gave her an exaggerated look of fear. She giggled. He was such a dork. But he made her laugh and he was so patient with her. It was something she always pictured that dads did. They made dumb jokes and they protected their kids. They certainly did not smack them around or come into their room at night and do unspeakable things to them.
She shook her head. She wanted to be normal about normal stuff. Melinda had told her it was okay to not be okay. So had Phil. But she wanted to be okay. She didn't want to feel the need to lock her bedroom door, or crawl into bed with her newly found mom to stop nightmares about very real things that had been done to her. She didn't want to lay awake at night fighting between her fear of falling asleep and her fear of staying awake with the dark consuming thoughts racing through her mind. Her musings were interrupted by a loud laugh from Melinda as Phil had seemingly tripped over his own feet after she let him go. He grinned as he got back up and bowed.
"See at least I fall with style."
"Yes dear. You keep telling yourself that." Melinda retorted.
Daisy smiled at the antics of her parents. Cause she saw them that way now. Her geeky, fun loving, quick witted, patient, kind-hearted, smart dad. And her sassy, badass, protective, compassionate mom who could read her like a book. Neither pushed her, and yet when she had allowed it, had been right there to give her pieces of themselves. She brushed a tear away as Melinda came over to the entrance and waved for her to join them. She did.
