Warnings: past violence, trauma, abandonment.


Chapter Two - Indigo - 1973-74

Of course, as expected, most everyone else does not take this well.

"No," Takeru says and for a moment Yamato can't help but imagine angry eleven year old Takeru when no one believed him about a missing Hikari. He remembers the extras of that seething fury, even knowing she was safe and home and fine now. "You can't. You'd be alone."

And while it's not the wrong thing to say, Yamato knows it isn't the right one either. He sees Hikari straighten up in a way that sends Daisuke still limping for cover, because while these two agree on many things, her being flesh and not glass is something they'll throw things at each other over mostly out of sight. He would know, he's seen it.

"I'll have the Digimon," she says, as patiently as she can, while looking him in the eye. There would be some gasping mothers if they had any (and it's entirely different, he can't help but think, to having lost his mother's time in the divorce, now he doesn't have her at all, it's so different.) "I'll be all right this time."

"We thought the others would be all right," Takeru says and even Yamato has to wince at the honesty there. He sees all the younger kids wince themselves. Iori in particular looks like he's been stabbed, or maybe he had been, Yamato has yet to look under the poor kid's bandages unlike Jou who is determined to do these nurses' jobs and then some. "We thought they would be all right without us and they weren't. We could have gotten to them, and now… we might not be able to get to you."

"Not right away, we won't," Koushiro agrees and for a moment, Yamato considers going and giving the genius a cuff on the head. But he can't, really. He can't, because he knows that's just how Koushiro is. Knowledge needs to be spread and clearly. Yamato feels Koushiro tries to express information as quickly and succinctly and understandably as possible because without it you can't be knowledgeable. Of everyone, Koushiro understands the power of his crest, and its weight. "And it's going to be difficult to get her through as it is. The barriers are still fresh. The Wall of Fire hasn't been breached yet."

"Not helping, Koushiro." Yamato watches Takeru turn bright red, his pale skin looking sunburned.

Koushiro swallows. "My apologies. I'm merely explaining what we have to do to be able to help further." He pauses, chews his lip. "And I don't think we will succeed at changing her mind anyway."

"You won't," Hikari-chan agrees cheerfully.

Daisuke's peeking over the couch now, over Taichi's couch, though Yamato hopes the kid hasn't noticed just how close he is to his mentor and friend. He doesn't know what's running through the junior chosen leader's head, but he hasn't asked yet, and now isn't the time.

"Hikari-chan," the kid says anyway, watching with some dim light in his eyes. "You're really fine with going. Never seeing with us again. After everything."

There is something accusatory there, laced with what Yamato knows his brother can label as vocal aconite, but Hikari only smiles it off and replies,

"Yes, Daisuke-kun."

Yamato watches his face fall, watches Miyako throw herself on her friend, and then watches his brother twitch and seethe and storm out, Patamon landing on his shoulder.

Yamato pauses a moment, nods to everyone, then walks out after him.

If Daisuke thinks he's being subtle in how he follows, well, Yamato isn't going to correct him.


"I'm not a baby who needs minding, Nii-san."

It's a testament to how unhappy his brother is that Takeru is talking at all, though that's only because he knows whatever shit he gives, Yamato can and will eventually sling back with interest and cheese in a can. "You're my brother who needs minding so he doesn't run off to find five girls to date at once to cover his massive insecurity issues."

"Oh thanks." Yamato waits for the telltale lip twitch, a habit of their mother's, just to be sure he hasn't gone too far, before sitting down. "She didn't even ask us if it was okay."

"I mean, Hikari-chan is like her brother in three ways." Yamato thinks he sounds reasonable here, but as Sora has told him he is incredibly lacking in the reasoning and logic department (like she can talk) he can't confirm. "One of them includes how dense she is in assuming we'll worry about her. The other is that she'll make a decision before the rest of us even think about the problem."

Daisuke flops down with them with not a lick of decorum or boundary space which means he's probably not as angry as he seems, only really confused and thankfully lacking a Cherrymon in his head. "What's the third one?" he asks, since Takeru is too busy scowling at the lower steps.

Yamato thinks about it, then bites the bullet and responds with "Being cute as hell."

Takeru chokes on spit, Daisuke lets out a peal of laughter that definitely hurts more going out than it does breathing in. Gabumon only stares at him, purely puzzled.

Yamato tries to grin it off, but his ears are pink so he's definitely failing at it.

But the two of them look a little happier now, so he takes his ribbing and his lumps like the adult he is going to be.

The thought makes him stop and for a few minutes, Yamato just sits and turns the image in his head. His hair turning up into spikes again, softer and less gel, a sloped weight to his cheeks, a sharpness to his fingers, tuned from years and years of music, touching a hand that isn't just smaller than his, but under his protection. Under his weight. Under his love in a way Takeru can't be.

For some reason, his face burns hotter, and he almost misses Daisuke's voice, impossibly quiet beneath his hands.

"Why didn't you guys find us?"

He sounds, grim, resigned, hurting raw. Also… guilty, somehow. Like he hasn't wanted to ask but there's an opportunity so he hits it with both fists.

Takeru gapes, swallows, shame filling his blue eyes like tears he's going to try and rub away again. And then, perhaps because the two of them have always liked using anger to hide when they're scared more than smiling ever worked, Takeru replies,

"Why didn't you let us come with you?"

Daisuke flinches, Of all people, Motomiya Daisuke flinches. And Yamato waits, because he knows that wasn't Takeru's way of defending himself now. That was Takeru's way of asking where they'd been supposed to start. What were they supposed to do? How could they help?

"It was just one patrol," Daisuke says, but it's weak, and he sounds tired. Like even he's stopped believing whatever they decided the answer was. "And...well, we figured even with the Holy Ring back, it'd be all right, we could handle it. We've been able to so far. And we knew you were busy and Hikari-chan wasn't answering her phone. We didn't see any point in waiting."

"Idiot." Yamato says the word, layers it with a fondness he doesn't have to for Taichi and Sora, who take his ribbing in stride. "It's worth waiting for your friends. And I think Hikari-chan knows that's what's going to happen." He smiles a little, and it's hard, carrying the guilt of not finding the others sooner, not helping them, not knowing. But it's not what Daisuke or his brother need, so he'll let Sora get on him over it later. "She knows we'll find a way to see each other again, and that we won't stop caring no matter how far life takes us."

"But why does it have to be her?"

Yamato doesn't even blink. "Because the rest of us don't want to."


Takeru has come to accept that his brother can actually cook. Watching his brother pretend to gag over the tiniest amount of wasabi got old fairly quickly, and no one could blame him for bopping his little brother on the nose, right?

Sora finds it adorable, but then she would because she gets the patented "Are you dating my brother while I'm here" teasing that covered up his dreadful insecurity because no one knew what to do with the half-French boy who could only pretend to flirt.

Yamato, like always, worries about Takeru. But it's easier now, in a sickening kind of way, to not say it. His brother doesn't need him to say it, and thus he doesn't have to.

Sora looks at him from her now near-permanent presence on his couch, in that narrowed-eyed way you get from moms and dads who have to be your moms. If his stomach lurches he ignores it.

"What are you thinking?" she asks him.

He makes a face. "Just about how nice it is to not have an ashtray in here."

She smiles at him in disbelief and he's glad she ends it there and goes back to her sewing. Piyomon sleeps beside her, as if she's afraid to go.

Yamato makes another effort to not bump into Gabumon's tail, only to look down and realize his friend is right beside him, holding the pan from the bread.

Yamato smiles and ignores that it's a little wet. "Don't burn yourself idiot."

Gabumon only smiles in his knowing way and waves a paw clad in an oven mitt.

Yamato watches him set the tray down, and is suddenly overcome with that rawness from being eleven years old, where they'd just sat and let him play harmonica, and again, months and another timeline ago, where he'd done it without asking.

"I learned a new song on the harmonica yesterday," he begins. "From some kids outside. Want to help me practice?"

Gabumon beams at him, and yes, they're definitely crying.

And that's he hears Sora and Piyomon sniffling from their lofty perch.

"I know why Takeru and Daisuke are angry," he finally says once they're all settled and the weirdest tv show is playing and they have warm bread and butter. "But we can't go. Convincing humans will be much harder than convincing Digimon. And Hikari-chan's always had that… tie to the Digital World that we don't have."

Yamato nods, glad he hadn't had to bring it up.

"Also she and Taichi are hiding something."

Sora says this as casually as opening a bottle of water. And she's Taichi's old friend so he believes her.

"Like what?" Because now his hair is prickling on his neck, and it makes him a little sweaty to think about. Taichi is, after all, awful at keeping secrets unless he doesn't understand them.

"Would Taichi really let any of us go to the Digital World alone with no way back? He came back for us." Sora wipes her mouth from where she'd bitten her lip. "He wouldn't leave any of us stranded. He definitely wouldn't leave Hikari-chan stranded. And we don't know how he came back to Earth with the pods."

Yamato considers this. "Do you think he knows a way to get back? And hasn't told Koushiro? Of all people."

Sora hesitates, but she nods. "Yes, I think so."

Before Yamato can even start to consider this, Takeru throws the front door open, walking with Iori and sounding happier than he has in days.

"Legos," he tells them with a grin. "We're gonna start early. Make them popular."

Iori's cheeks are flushed, he hands twitchy, and Upamon on top of the bag stretches his ear wings.

Yamato fixes them both with his most approving stare. "Sounds great to me. Let's show the digimon how it works."

And if Iori lights up like an actual preteen, and Takeru looks a little bit proud, well, it's worth keeping those dark thoughts in the back of their minds a little bit longer.


When Koushiro calls up to tell them that they're ready to go whenever, it's the afternoon after he's been accused of truancy. Apparently, there are issues with him in school and if it weren't for his grades, he'd have been expelled.

The school gets an angry mob of twelve children and one carefully disguised giant ladybug, headed by Taichi and Mimi the second they hear it, who probably make the teachers wet themselves through sheer force of personality. Yamato keeps order and if someone tries to escape, gets the younger kids to form a barrier or stands in their face himself, and dares them to run with his eyes alone.

Koushiro is their friend, their partner, their comrade as much as anyone, and no supposed problems are allowed to keep him from being everything he should.

Koushiro leaves the school flushed with euphoria and warm feelings and all of them pile Koushiro into a hug of pride that he returns with everything he has.

They spend the night, all of them, running through the playground, picking at grass, shoving homework around, making sandwiches and rice balls, preparing even if they don't want to admit it. Yamato watches Taichi hug Hikari and spin her about like they're little kids again and she laughs into his shoulder.

Somehow, Mimi gets a hold of a guitar and demands Yamato sing his heart out.

He does and Mimi joins him and for a moment, one blissful track, he can think he could spend the rest of his life with Mimi too, flushed with life and the pleasure of the present day.

But Sora takes his hand and squeezes it around the blisters from the strings, and he knows just why he isn't going to.

And that, he realizes as he looks at Mimi flopping ungainly between Meiko and Miyako and earning them both laughing like loons, is just fine.

They are just fine.

But he isn't sure until he sees Hikari-chan, nestled between his brother and Daisuke like friends should be, all caught together and playing with her camera.

Wait.

"Put that camera away or so help me-"

Takeru snatches the camera from Hikari's hands and flees his grip and Yamato sees Hikari-chan and Daisuke lean on each other, laughing so hard they cry.

And he smiles a little, only for it to widen as Taichi trips Takeru and pins him to the ground, knowing exactly where and how to get him sputtering laughter.

Which Yamato has to stop of course. No one's allowed to lay a hand on his little brother without his permission. Especially not Taichi? Right? Right.


A small hand shakes Yamato awake. He half-expects to see Sora, outlined in the rising sun and beautifully shaded in oranges, it making her hair crackle in place like a forest fire.

It's not. It's Hikari-chan, and she looks at him solemn and old.

"Wh' time is it?"

"Early," she says, a sheepish smile crossing her face. "They want to send me through first with Tailmon. Just in case."

He sits up, suspicion crossing his face. Yamato nods slowly. In case. Right.

"You're not allowed to die," he tells her. "Takeru would never forgive you."

She laughs behind her hand. "Onii-chan says that about you and Sora-san all the time."

He wants to laugh back, but the situation lingers. He glances at Daisuke and Takeru, tangled in each other in a way that will find them sniping at each other because Daisuke is firmly Ken and Miyako sexual and Takeru is bless him, in the closet with the ugly American Christmas sweaters. "Want to dump ice water on those two?"

She beams and Yamato feels relief in his toes that she's now never going to marry Takeru.

Soon the twenty-five of them are passing around coffee, donuts, tea and for the Digimon, whole submarine sandwiches. There are reasons for this, Koushiro promises.

Takeru is shooting him dirty looks across the circle as he drips water into his coffee and Yamato bats his eyelashes as if to say, "who, me?" in the most genuine expression possible. Sora snorts, barely awake on his shoulder.

Mimi gently clocks Koushiro's cheek with a bottle of oolong tea, forcing him to take one hand from his computer in order to drink it. No one is around yet, which is what Yamato chalks up to the fact that he didn't wake up in a jail cell or with cuffs on his hands. How no one found them sleeping in a park and did anything is just weird.

Or maybe it's just the day. It's a winter morning in 1974 and the world is still turning. And now they have to join in.

"Hikari-san," Koushiro finally says, soft and solemn. "Will you and Tailmon stand in the middle?"

The low chatter goes silent. Hikari nods, rises to her feet with Tailmon and a small backpack in hand. She'd talked them all out of too much, pointing out she'd be on the move most of the time and that she'd have her D-Terminal for them to figure out sending items through anyway. She smiles at them, but focuses mainly on Koushiro.

Yamato gently picks up Gabumon and his partner comes willingly, squeezing around him with a steady pair of arms.

"The program is all warmed up," Koushiro says softly, black eyes steady on them all. "We're ready at any time."

"I'm not," Daisuke grumbles. Takeru agrees with a scowl.

Hikari smiles underneath her eyelashes. "Next time you see me, Daisuke-kun, I'll be buff and flex all over you."

His eyes go wide with horror. "No."

Miyako snorts. "Sounds hot."

"Miyako!"

Iori chokes on his donut as Poromon scolds her in his high chirpy voice, likely for the last time.

Hikari only laughs and glances at her brother. He's smiling, but sadly, and that worm of suspicion wiggles in Yamato's gut again.

It's gone as Koushiro types and calibrates or whatever he's doing, and beside Mimi, Meiko goes stiff as a board. Then a tingle runs down his spine, sending his hair standing on end. He balks and clutches Gabumon tighter. Hikari merely looks up and it draws their eyes upward.

It's like a tear on a piece of paper that was glued on a piece of cardboard, ripping off to see the color underneath. The sky rips open a slit, and the leaves on the trees begin to tug themselves up into it, followed by rocks, stray litter, and donuts left unattended. Chibimon squawks his dismay at the loss.

Hikari regards them all, lets Tailmon tighten her grip on her jacket, and then beams. "I'm off."

"Be careful out there," he says before Takeru can do something stupid.

"Punch someone for me," Taichi adds.

She nods to them, grin widening as Mimi twitches to scoop her into a hug and settles for nearly breaking Meiko's ribs instead.

Then, she lifts her D-3 up towards the burning, bright light and then, all trace of her and Tailmon is gone.

For a few moments, they just stare, silently where they left. All but Koushiro, who is typing furiously again. If this works, the Digimon are next. If it doesn't, the Digimon stay, and plans change.

Minutes tick past. No one gets up to pace, lest they get caught in the light themselves and they all really get screwed over. The digimon are vibrating. Gabumon leans on him.

"You sure you want to go?" Yamato asks him.

Gabumon shakes his head. "Not really, but I should. I don't want Yamato to be hurt because of us again."

"I'd take a thousand rocks and photobombs for you," Yamato assures him, only to get the big red stare burning into his.

"What about a thousand and one?"

It takes Yamato a minute to realize he's joking. "Nah you gotta get hit with that last one." Yamato rubs his knuckles into the Digimon's head with a scoff and a fond smile. "Maybe you'll get back in time to meet my kids and partner with them."

Gabumon regards him with that utter serenity that comes from just being Gabumon. "I'm always only going to be your partner, Yamato."

And that hurts, but it settles an ancient ache in his chest. Yamato squeezes him tighter. "Yeah, I know."

There's a beep from all of their pockets. They all fumble out their D-Terminals.

"Koushiro-san is a jerk," reads on their screen. "He dropped me on a Monochromon."

Takeru snorts. "Good."

They laugh.

Another beep. "I'm fine now, no thanks to Takeru-kun. I'm sending you new coordinates."

"She always knows," Yamato hears his brother grumble and he laughs.

"She'd better."

Koushiro's hand tightens on Tentomon's shell, and for a moment, he seems to hesitate. Then he nods. "We're set. Is everyone ready?"

No. "Yeah," Taichi says, just to be contrary. "Let's do it.

And for once, Yamato agrees without arguing about it. "Yeah. Let's do it."

The digimon nod to their partners, and as one, to Meiko. The girl flushes with some hidden joy.

Yamato swallows the lump in his throat, and lets Gabumon go. It hurts more this time than the last.

But that's okay. Sometimes things hurt. Sometimes things change. That doesn't make them worth having. Maybe this time, this world, they'll be able to prove it.

No. They're definitely going to.


"You know," he says to Sora and Takeru as they walk home that day. "I think I'm gonna go into space."

"Really."

He waits, feels their disbelief on his spine. Then he laughs. "Heck no, I'm going to do lightspeed travel, then go into space."

"You and Taichi have to work on that competition thing," Sora tells him. But she's smiling and he suspects Takeru is too.

Good to know some things don't have to change.


A/N: This is a story that comes out of me with great joy and great sorrow. To me, this is a story of growing up and living. Not only that things change and we will not always win without sacrifices, but that if you wish for it, you will find the love you need and wish for despite everything else. Put another way, it's another story I wanted to tell in My Sanctuary, but I was too young and inexperienced to do. I hope this story will cause you to feel something by the end, if it hasn't already. That's my fervent wish.

And admittedly, I'm getting a little sentimental early on. I can't help it. This story carries a lot of things I want to tell people in the end.

On the more important things, poly Chosen? Poly Chosen. They all love each other in their own ways. After all, Sora's love is everyone's love and Yamato's friendship is everyone's too.

On that note, next chapter is Sora. Look forward to her. And don't worry, this isn't the last we'll see of Hikari.