To RandomFanAuthor- I would love to write something for Albania! I was going to put something in this about it, but I couldn't quite come up with something just right, you know? Maybe I'll work on it some other time and one-shot it!


Leo had trusted Louisa to steer. It probably wasn't a good idea, considering the amount of coffee she had drunk this morning, but he had a job to do and he was the only one skinny enough to fit in the crawl space. Wedged between the layers of the hull with the plumbing and the wiring, Leo could be alone with his thoughts. He didn't want to come out of the wall; every time he got frustrated, he could hit stuff with his mallet and the others would not think anything of it. He could tantrum in peace and that's exactly what he needed.

There was one problem with his sanctuary. He only fitted up to his waist. His legs and butt were still on view, which made it very hard for him to hide. Louisa had thought it was most amusing, but she had grown used to talking to his backside the last few hours. "Don't make much difference from ya face, Valdez!"

"Leo!" Piper's voice came from somewhere behind him. "We need you!" She pulled on his leg. The celestial bronze O-ring fell from Leo's pliers and vanished into the depths of the crawl space. Leo sighed.

"Talk to the pants, Piper! The hands are busy!"

"I am not talking to the pants! Meeting in the mess hall, we're almost at Olympia. Yes, Lou, that includes you."

"Uuggghh, do I have ta?"

"Yes. Leo?"

"Yeah, yeah, I'll be there in a sec."

"What are you doing in there anyway? You've been in the hull for days!" Leo swept his flashlight across the celestial bronze plates and pistons he had been installing. It was slow work, but he was making progress.

"Just routine maintenance!" He called back. He got silence in return and swore under his breath. Piper was a little too good at knowing when he was lying. She said his name, her tone warning. "Hey," Leo cut across, "while you're out there, do me a favour. I've got this itch right below my-"

"Fine! I'm leaving!" He heard Louisa breaking down in peals of laughter. "Do not encourage him, Louisa!" Piper warned furiously. Leo heard her stomp out. It took Louisa a while to wear herself out. As soon as he popped out of the wall, however, she cracked up all over again, leaning on the wheel. Leo grinned lopsidedly.

"I'll be back in a bit," Leo told her, "got some stuff to do."

"OK," she wheezed, "go itch that butt."

"Who said it was my butt?" He smirked. She half-groaned in disgust, laughter bubbling up once more. She waved him away. Leo went to his cabin, which wasn't technically his cabin. He didn't sleep there. His mattress was buried in wires, nails and the guts of several disassembled bronze machines. His three massive rolling tool cabinets- Chico, Harpo and Groucho- took up most of the room. Dozens of power tools hung on the walls. The worktable was almost lost under photocopied blueprints from On Spheres, the Archimedes text Leo had recovered from an underground workshop in Rome.

Leo preferred to sleep in the engine room. The constant hum of machinery lulled him to sleep. And, ever since his time on Ogygia, he had become rather fond of camping outside. A bedroll on the floor was all he needed.

He retrieved his keys from his belt, opened the middle drawer of Groucho. He didn't really have time for this, but he stared at the two precious objects inside. The first was a bronze astrolabe he had liberated from those dwarves in Bologna. The second was a fist-sized chunk of crystal from Ogygia. He hadn't figured out how to put the two together, no matter how much he racked his brain. Hence the temper tantrums in the walls.

Thoughts of Calypso collided with thoughts of Louisa. He had been smitten with Louisa since the moment he saw her. They had spent months together, rarely apart. Be it in Bunker Nine where they could torment his siblings. Or in the arena, while he and Piper watched her kick Jason's ass. At the camp fire, sharing marshmallows and judging other people together; at meal times stealing each other's desserts; at meetings where they only had to share a look to get the giggles; training, which Leo wasn't very good at or races, which Leo also wasn't very good; the errands she ran for him, even the one to the Underworld; all the times she brought him and his siblings food and threatened them into showers on pain of death; her tolerance for his constant Rolling Stones and then how she would hum the tunes when she thought he wasn't listening; she knew his life story and he knew some of hers- there was always something to learn about her. She knew how weird he was and proceeded to out-weird him at every turn.

But there was also Calypso. Yes, OK, she had hated Leo at first and he did destroy one of her tables- totally an accident, of course, but she didn't see it that way. But she had been kind and warm, she had rolled her sleeves up and picked up being Leo's assistant with hardly a second thought. She had made him the fireproof clothing and the fireproof bag for Frank's lifeline. Once she got over his irritating nature, she had been patient, but firm. She kept him on task, she had a wicked sense of humour, she had been caring and sweet and when she had kissed Leo, he thought his brain had backfired completely.

He pushed the drawer shut with a sigh. What was he going to do? Odysseus had never got the astrolabe working. He hadn't had a crystal to use as a homing beacon. Leo did. He would have to succeed where the cleverest demigod of all time had failed. It was rather typical of his luck- not only had he fallen for two impossibly powerful women, but for one he had to figure out how to wire a stupid chunk of rock into a three-thousand year old navigation device and for the other, he ran the risk of having his head ripped off by her brother. Neither of those problems would be fixed by duct tape.

He looked to his bulletin board. Two pictures hung side by side. The first was the crayon drawing of the Argo he had done when he was seven years old. The next was a charcoal sketch Hazel had done for him. As soon as they found Leo in Malta, she had known his pain right away. The first chance she got, after the whole fiasco at the House of Hades, she had marched into Leo's cabin with a single word on her lips: "Spill."

So Leo told her. She came back later that evening with her sketch pad and charcoal pencils. "Describe her." She had said. "Every detail." Leo described her easily- he couldn't close his eyes without seeing her. Now Calypso's likeness gazed back at him from the bulletin board, a slight downward turn to her mouth, her brow knitted. Leo Valdez, he could hear her say, you are so full of it.

The hum of the ship's engines changed to a lower pitch. Over the cabin loudspeaker, Festus creaked at him.

"Yeah, thanks, buddy." Leo said. "On my way."

The others were eating breakfast. Louisa had left Festus in charge of steering. Ever since Piper had permanently activated the dragon- a feat Leo still did not understand- he had done an excellent job of running the ship with no-one at the helm. And there was always Buford as back-up.

Coach Hedge had left. Leo had decided that, in the satyr's absence, Buford could do just as good a job as their previous adult chaperone. He had laminated a holographic simulation of Coach Hedge to Buford's table top. Mini-Hedge stomped about on Buford's top, randomly yelling at anything that moved. "CUT THAT OUT!" He would scream. "I'M GONNA KILL YOU!" and the ever popular, "PUT SOME CLOTHES ON!" It had taken all of Leo's power to stop Louisa punting the table off the side of the ship, but that didn't stop her from trying.

Buford now manned the helm. Leo stood in the doorway of the mess hall, taking in the scene around the dining table. It wasn't often he got to see all his friends together, especially without someone or something trying to kill them.

Percy was eating a huge stack of blue pancakes. Annabeth sat next to him, scolding him for pouring on too much syrup.

"You're drowning them!" She protested.

"Hey, I'm the son of Poseidon." He stuck his tongue out. "I can't drown, so neither can my pancakes." Louisa knocked the bottle from his hands as she passed, cackling as he pouted at the back of her head. Frank and Hazel sat to their left, using cereal bowls to flatten a map of Greece. They poured over it, heads close together. Every now and then, Frank's hand would cover Hazel's, squeezing her fingers. Hazel smiled every time he did, no longer flustered at the contact. A vast improvement for a girl from the nineteen-forties. Now if only they could get her used to Louisa's foul mouth. Jason sat at the head of the table, uncomfortable, his T-shirt rolled up to his ribcage as Nurse Piper removed his bandages. Louisa stopped on the other side of him, summoning her water gloves.

"Hold still," Piper said, "I know it hurts." She added when he grimaced.

"It's just cold." He said. Louisa lay her hands on the injuries and he relaxed slightly. The entrance wound on his back was an ugly shade of purple and it steamed. Piper had privately aired her worries to Leo. No matter how much she tried to stay positive in front of Jason, no medicine was working. Not ambrosia, not nectar, no amount of mortal medicine. The only partially effective thing was Louisa's healing, but she was easing his pain more than healing. A deep cut from Celestial bronze or Imperial gold could literally dissolve a demigod's essence from the inside out.

When asked how she had recovered from Chrysaor's blade, Louisa had shrugged.

"Look, demigod injuries are weird as fuck. I'll see what I can find out, but in the meantime, will ya move? I'm bustin' for a wee."

So, every few hours, Louisa worked her water magic on Jason's injuries.

"What's up, guys?" Leo beamed, waving as he strolled into the mess hall. "Aw, yes to brownies!" He grabbed the last one over Annabeth's shoulder- from a sea-salt recipe they had picked up from Aphros, the fish centaur at the bottom of the Atlantic. Louisa glared at him.

"That was mine." She protested. Leo took a large bite.

"You snooze you lose!" The intercom crackled. Buford's Mini-Hedge screamed over the speakers.

"PUT SOME CLOTHES ON!" Everyone jumped. Hazel ended up five feet away from Frank. Percy sent his orange juice flying. Louisa took a step back, dropping water on Piper's head. Jason awkwardly wiggled back into his shirt and Frank turned into a bulldog. Piper glared at Leo, swiping water from her face.

"I thought you were getting rid of that stupid hologram."

"Hey, it's just Buford saying good morning! He loves his hologram!" Leo held his hands up. Louisa waved her fingers, the water flowing Piper's face and hair. "Look, we all miss the Coach. And Frank makes a cute bulldog." Frank turned back into a burly, grumpy Chinese-Canadian.

"Just sit down, Leo. We've got stuff to talk about." Leo squeezed between Jason and Hazel, the two least likely to hit him for a stupid joke. He momentarily forgot about Louisa. She loomed over him. He shoved the last of his- her- brownie into his mouth and smiled sweetly. She elbowed him over a little. Piper helped lift Jason's shirt again and she went back to water magicking. Leo grabbed a pack of Fonzies. Jason leaned forward in his seat, wincing. Louisa muttered vulgarities as he moved.

"We're going to stay airborne," he said, "and drop anchor as close as we can to Olympia. It's further inland than I'd like, about five miles. But we don't have much choice. According to Juno, ow."

"Keep still then, dumbass."

"According to Juno, we have to find the goddess of victory and, um… subdue her." Jason noticed Percy. "What?"

"No, I'm not glaring you at you." He jabbed a finger at his sister. She looked up, frowning.

"What?"

"Teach me your secrets." He demanded. Louisa looked down at her hands, snorting bemusedly.

"Nah." She stuck her tongue out. Jason winced, murmuring an 'ouch'. "You do better then, Sparky."

"Sorry." Jason grimaced. Percy stuck his fork in his pancakes sulkily. He could only heal himself and Louisa, water-based demigods. He may have cleared Jason's lungs of water in the nymphs' shrine, but he had not yet learnt how to heal wounds. "So, yeah," Jason continued, "we need to find this victory goddess and subdue her." He looked around the table. Everyone stared back at him. Louisa snickered at his side.

"Way ta go, Sparky, ya got 'em all rarin' ta go."

"I'd like to see you do better."

"Done deal." Louisa smirked. "Nike likes ta win, don't mention any other sports brands, unless ya want a bigger meltdown. Kick her ass, tie her up, bring her back here 'n' we get goin' again. We got this." She nodded. "I'm gonna smack Gaia in the face myself."

"Confidence," Leo nodded, "I approve."

"Shut up 'n' eat ya Fonzies."

"I'm down for fighting the occasional goddess," Percy said around his mouthful, "but I thought Nike was one of the good ones? I mean, I personally like victory, can't get enough of it."

"It does seem strange," Annabeth agreed, "I understand Nike being in Olympia, home of the Olympics. Contestants sacrificed to her, Greeks and Romans, for like twelve hundred years, right?"

"Almost to the end of the Roman empire," Frank nodded, "Romans called her Victoria, but same difference. Everybody loved her, who doesn't like to win? Why would we have to subdue her?" Jason frowned, wincing. Steam curled from his wound.

"Sorry, sorry." Louisa murmured. "I'm only good for physical wounds, not spiritual ones."

"It's OK, Lou," Jason assured, "thank you." He faced the group again. "The ghoul, Antonius said 'victory runs rampant in Olympia'. Juno warned us we couldn't heal the Greek/Roman rift without defeating victory."

"How?" Piper frowned. "It sounds like a riddle."

"Like eating only one Fonzie." Leo said, shovelling a handful in his mouth. Hazel wrinkled her nose.

"Those things will kill you."

"You kidding? So many preservatives, I'm gonna live forever."

"Gods help us all." Louisa grumbled.

"Anyway," Leo pressed on, "remember Nike's kids at camp?"

"No." Frank and Hazel said. Everyone else made faces, Louisa simply sighed.

"Super-competitive," Percy said, "worse than the Ares kids. No offence, Frank." Frank shrugged it off.

"So, Nike has a dark side?" He asked.

"Her kids sure do," Annabeth said, "they never turn down a challenge. Do they, Louisa?" She glowered at Louisa. Louisa did her best to look sweet and innocent. Leo twisted in his seat to look at her quizzically, but she offered no answers. "They have to be number one at everything." Annabeth carried on, "if their mom is that intense…"

"Wait…" Piper put her hand on the table, realisation dawning on her face. "Guys, all the gods are split between their Greek and Roman aspects, right? If Nike's that way and she's the goddess of victory-"

"She'd be really conflicted." Annabeth said. "She'd want one side or the other to win so she could declare a victor. She'd literally be fighting with herself." Hazel nudged her cereal bowl across the map of Greece.

"But we don't want one side or the other to win. We've got to get the Greeks and Romans on the same team."

"Told ya ta let me kill Octavian."

"If the goddess of victory is running rampant," Jason said, "torn between her two sides, she might make it impossible to bring the two camps together." Percy stabbed at his pancakes.

"You know how Ares can spark a fight by walking into a crowded room? Does Nike radiate a competitive vibe or something? She could aggravate the whole Greek-Roman rivalry big-time."

"Yes she does 'n' yes she is." Louisa lowered her hands, shaking the water away. Piper helped Jason back into his T-shirt.

"Thanks, Lou."

"We should send a party of four," Frank piped up, "two Greeks, two Romans. If we can balance our sides, maybe it'll help keep her balanced."

"Frank's right." Annabeth nodded. "A party of four. But we'll have to be careful who goes. We don't want anything that makes Nike, uh… more unstable."

"I'll go." Piper offered. "I can try charmspeaking her."

"Not this time, Piper." Annabeth shook her head. "In her own way, Aphrodite is almost as competitive as Nike-" Louisa scoffed. "-I think Nike might see you as a threat." Piper wasn't upset with Annabeth's refusal, simply nodding. "Percy and Jason definitely can't go together. Jupiter and Poseidon, that's a bad combination." Louisa cleared her throat. "You shouldn't go full-stop, you're a nightmare." She looked to Percy and Jason. "Nike could get you two fighting easily." Percy gave her a sideways smile.

"Yeah, we can't have another Kansas. I might kill my bro Jason."

"Or I might kill my bro Percy." Jason said amiably. Louisa groaned, rolling her eyes.

"Or I might kill ya both for bein' dicks."

"Which proves my point." Annabeth nodded. "We can't send me and Frank, Mars and Athena would be just as bad."

"OK." Leo broke in. "So, Percy and me for the Greeks. Frank and Hazel for the Romans. Is that the ultimate non-competitive dream team or what?" Annabeth and Frank exchanged war-godly looks.

"It could work." Frank decided. "I mean, no combination is perfect, but Poseidon, Hephaestus, Pluto and Mars… I don't see any huge antagonism there. No, Lou, you are definitely not going." Louisa stared at him.

"Why not?" She demanded. "Ya'll considered Jason 'n' the poor bastard's been stabbed through his fuckin' soul!"

"You were stabbed and came with us to fight the zombie nymphs!"

"Who's gonna pass up a chance to fight zombie nymphs?" Louisa threw her hands up. "I, for one, would love to kick Nike's ass. Adidas just don't cut it for me." Annabeth put her head in her hands. Leo laughed into his bag of Fonzies. Louisa couldn't keep a straight face for longer than ten seconds. The air around the table cleared, Leo's giggles spreading through them. Annabeth looked up.

"So, it's decided then. Frank, Hazel, Percy and Leo." She cut Louisa a warning look. "How did Jessica put up with you for so long?" Louisa's eyes widened.

"She's scary!" She hissed. Annabeth's brow furrowed. A million questions zipped through her mind, not one staying long enough to voice. Louisa nodded seriously and Annabeth settled on questioning life itself. "Anyhoo, ain't you lot got somewhere ta be? Fuck off, all of ya."