"Hey, Toshi are you free?" Kondo asks as he enters the living room. I was currently sitting on the couch, enjoying a nice cigarette with Takasugi, while Zenzou was stuck with his hemorrhoids in the bathroom.
I take out the cigarette in my mouth and crush it into the ashtray before walking to Kondo-san. "What is it, Kondo-san?"
The older man handed me a bag, and once it was transferred to me, I realized just how heavy it was. I mean it wasn't heavy enough for me to break my shoulders, but it was very much heavy. I give Kondo-san a questioning look, and he seems to have read it. "I need you to go to Katsura's shop and drop these off! It seems he forgot his designs and materials here, and he just called in asking for someone to drop it off." He explains. "Normally, I would ask Zenzou since he is fast on his feet, but seeing as he is…" There were light groans coming from the bathroom that I did not want to question. "I was thinking that Toshi could use the time to get to know Katsura!"
Well, it was true that I knew barely anything about the long-haired man, well besides his obsession with the stupidest things which includes ducks. But, I have a higher suspicion that Kondo-san just wanted me to do it instead of him so he could stalk that college girl—not that I will ever pry. I remember the chief's office and pale. Yes, I don't ever want to pry.
"Oh? You're going to Zura's?" Takasugi approaches the two of us, joining into the conversation. I have been hanging out with Takasugi most of the time of my stay. We are very similar, so it was easy for us to get along but the only problem with this was that he was childhood friends with Gintoki and Katsura. Katsura wasn't so much of a problem—no matter how quirky he is—but that silver perm idiot always got on my nerves!
Anyways, Takasugi looks to me. "Mind if I tag along? It's pretty boring here without those two loudmouths or you. Plus, I don't want to be stuck wth a zoo gorilla and a ninja on the toilet."
"Who are you calling zoo gorilla! I may be a gorilla but—" Kondo-san tries to argue, but is only ignored by the two of us.
"Sure, besides," I give Takasugi a little smirk. "I don't know where that guy's shop is."
He returns the smirk with his own and a chuckle. "You won't be too surprised when you see the place."
"As I was saying."
I am officially irked. Takasugi and I had just entered a store called, "JooiRevo", and the instant we entered, we were surrounded by flashy clothes—wait, correction—costumes. The whole shop was filled with them! Sure they were pretty well made, and quite beautiful—but what is with all these costumes! Most of the store had female costumes, with some male ones every so often, but it was definitely a store for women. At least no one is here yet… I sweat at the thought of walking in here with a full house of women. They would stare at us strangely for even entering a store like this.
"Ahh—we are closed for the day!" A deep voice calls from inside the store, then a beautiful woman pops out. She was tall for a woman, but her hair was silky and long. She wore an indigo kimono with orange maple leaves decorating it. When her brown eyes caught onto Takasugi and me they widened. She must think it's weird for males to come into the shop.
Takasugi walks up to her as if it was normal, taking the heavy bag from my arms. "Yo, Zura! We brought your stuff."
Wait… I blink. 'Zura'? My eyes widen from shock before looking at the beautiful woman to Takasugi.
"That's Katsura?!"
The beautiful woman takes the bag from Takasugi before hitting him. "It's not Zura. It's Zurako!" Then she—he turns to me and smiles. "Thank you Hijikata-san for bringing this over. Since you are here, why not come take a tour?"
A tour? Why not—it's not like there is anything to do anyways. "Sure." I follow Katsura (It's not Katsura, it's Zurako!) and Takasugi to the inside of the store—which is usually only for staff. We pass by more costumes on the way, though these ones are more traditional clothing. "So Katsura, you make women clothing?" I inquire as we reach the staff room.
This causes the long-haired man to stop in his tracks and stare at me in bewilderment. "Huh? Women clothes? No—no—no." He laughs. "These are for both men and women! This shop is for costumes, ceremonial garb, disguises, and etc.!"
Takasugi cuts in with a nonchalant tone, "Basically, it's a store for perverts, otakus, and cosplayers."
"No! They are very respectable people who want to keep their identities a secret!" Katsura shouts back at the purple haired man. But that argument doesn't really help…
Takasugi bites back, "And they have to keep their identities a secret? What respectable people! Plus wearing your clothes would make them stick out like a sore thumb!"
"Oh yeah! Well, they get a lot of joy from my Jooi clothes!" Katsura argues. Then, he turns to me to laugh. "You get it, 'joy' and 'Jooi'? Ahahahahahahah!"
It's sad that you are laughing at your own joke! I practically scream in my head as I feel my eye twitch.
"Oi, Zura!" an annoyingly familiar voice barges in. I turn in the direction of the voice, my eye twitching like hell. It couldn't be… "How long do I need to—!"
I froze at the sight. There was curly, silver hair up in pigtails, a light pink kimono with accents of darker pink blossoms, and those dead-fish red eyes—Sakata Gintoki. He stands before me, dressed as a woman. I shouldn't be too shocked—seeing how Katsura is dressed. But, I am. Not on the fact of how he is cross-dressing—but rather on the fact that he actually can pull off looking like a pretty woman. Katsura looked slightly feminine in the first place, so I could understand him looking like a beautiful woman—but not Gintoki who looks were fairly manly.
None-the-less, the both of us stay frozen as we stare at each other in shock. Gintoki pales considerably as Takasugi breaks out laughing like crazy in the background.
Katsura is the first one to break the silence(well, second if you count Takasugi's onslaught laughter.) with an oblivious wave. "Oh! Paako! Come out and greet the guests!~"
A vein pops from the silver perm head as he storms to Katsura. He then takes the liberty of delivering a punch to the other crossdresser, and still clenching his fist he yells.
"Oh, Paako! What are you doing!?" The long-haired man cries out in a girly voice.
"What do you mean 'guests'?! Don't make this place sound like an okama bar?! Why are they here?! Huh?!" Gintoki turns to glare at Takasugi who is still going crazy in laughter. "And, Takasugi shut up!" He returns to Katsura. "And who are you calling 'Paako', 'Paako~'! You big retard!" He kicks Katsura who tries to get back up to the floor again, before turning to glare at me. He then stomps towards me with flashing, predatory eyes. He grabs me by the color of my shirt and gives me a death glare. "I didn't dress like this because I wanted to you here me!"
"I got it, I got it! Now let go!" I grab his hand and pull it off of me. "Geez."
Now, silver perm is scratching his head muttering, "Ahh—now I did it. I went and did it! I should've never have let Zura convince me…"
I gulp feeling slightly guilty for the man in front of me, whose pride was stripped from him and stomped on into pieces. I reach out to him, placing my hand on his shoulder. "Oi." He turns to me, showing his pale face. "…At least you don't look bad… I mean in the kimono…" I can feel my cheeks slightly heat up from embarrassment at what I just said, making my eyes shift to the side.
There was a pause of silence before Gintoki replies. "That doesn't make me feel any better." He deadpans.
In the background, Takasugi was still on his laughing high and Katsura was on the floor, still trying to get up.
"Ahahahah! Ahahahahaha!"
Dear God of Mayonnaise—what is happening right now? Your lost lamb is confused at how he got himself into this situation. The last I remember, I swear I have woken up like in every other morning—before my alarm rang. I got ready like usual, performed all my morning rituals before heading downstairs to make breakfast. That is when I see it.
What is it?
Well, of course, it's this crazy wavy haired brunette man who sits at the dining table while wearing sunglasses indoors and laughing.
Just what is so funny?
I'm still frozen at the entrance to the kitchen/dining room, and I am so tempted to just hop back into bed like I saw nothing. But, I go against this instinct and instead make a U-turn straight to Takasugi's room.
I slam his door open and walk over to Takasugi, who is still asleep even after all the commotion. I kick him a couple of times hissing, "Oi, Takasugi! Wake up!"
The one-eyed man scrunches his eyebrows, not wanting to wake up. But, after another kick, he finally does—by grabbing my leg to stop me from kicking. He glares up at me, but after realizing that it was me, he stops and groans. "Uggh… What do you want so early in the morning, Hijikata?"
Without speaking a word, I hastily pull him up from his futon and drag him downstairs to the kitchen entrance. We stand behind the wall of the entrance where Takasugi looks at me bewildered. I just silently point inside.
"Ahahahah! Ahahahahaha!" The stranger was still laughing.
I hear a sigh from beside me and look down at Takasugi. He shakes his head before entering the dining room. "Oi." He greets the brunette stranger. "Why are you laughing? You are going to wake up the whole house."
The stranger perks up at the sight of the purple-haired man and jumps up to greet him. "Oh! Takasugi! I didn't see you there! Ahahahah! I just got home! Ahahahahaha! You know—you are as short as I last saw you!—!" Suddenly, Takasugi kicks the man on the floor and stomps on him.
"Shut up! Take off your sunglasses, they are ruining your eyesight!" Takasugi growls at the brunette. He then waves to me to come in. "Also, you are being a creep, Sakamoto. You were weirding out our new housemate." Takasugi gives the man a final kick before turning to me. "Never call me short again or I'll kill you." He then directs his speech to me. "You can go make breakfast now. I'm going to go brush up." Takasugi walks towards the exit and before crossing it, he pipes in. "Oh, and that loudmouth idiot is Sakamoto Tatsuma! Don't mind him too much—he is always weird."
After Takasugi left, I finally get to making breakfast. Today's menu is rice with fried fish and a side of miso soup. As I am preparing the meal, I can feel Sakamoto get beside me. I look over my shoulder to give him attention. "What?"
The guy laughs, "I never got to introduce myself when you were moving in! I'm Sakamoto Tatsuma, CEO of the Kaientai Group!" His tone changes to be more serious. "Nice to meet you."
Kaientai Group? That famous successful trading company that was built by a very young man?! So this guy created the Kaientai Group?! This guy may seem like an idiot, laughing all the time, but now that I can see his eyes without those stupid sunglasses, he actually looks pretty sharp. I introduce myself back. "Hijikata Toshirou, vice-commander of the police."
"Oh! A cop, huh! Ahahahah! Ahahahahaha!" Even though Sakamoto seemed so serious earlier, he reverts back to his weird laughter self. I glance at him one more time, examining the seemingly idiotic man, before sliding back to preparing breakfast.
Another weird guy added into the family mix.
This family is full of weirdos.
