Author's note: Now I know why some authors take a long time to update. I'm experiencing it myself, it's called 'real life' and 'sickness' *bricked*. For the sake of continuity in the story, I re-read from first chapter and feel embarrassed /)_(\. I was beyond nervous just to make the correct spelling, and I still am, both on spelling and storyline. But here we are, now on the second arc of the story (how many arcs in this story anyway?). I'm sorry that the event in Winter is not coming yet. It was the first plan that I want Winter's event, but I change my mind. it's still Summer and then I'll start with Fall. I've never been to America, so I'll research as much as I could for their trip.

I'm very depressed right now because our king just passed away. It's difficult to write something happy. Fortunately, this chapter isn't about happiness much. Just one more problem unlocked.

Thank you everyone for reading/review/fav/follow!


Mikey couldn't sleep.

When he said he would have a nightmare for weeks, he half-expected it would happen for two or three days. Not five days straight. Not when a downpour of rain kept hitting the truck roof where they were sleeping on the road. It was pitch black outside. He couldn't see or hear anything, so he tried to go back to sleep again. But the image of the death and clicker were still fresh behind his eyelids so he sat up, kicking off the dirty gray cloak they used as a blanket, blinking sleepily in the darkness. Leo said they would manage with the limited resources they have until he could find camping tools like a tent. It would be a while since they hadn't reached the next town.

He had hoped Leo would wake up the moment he sat, but his big brother was too tired and continue sleeping. Now Mikey was bored. He couldn't read his comic without a light. He wriggled his toes and reached down to touch his ankle. The stitch was gone. Leo cut it out late because they were busy with… other things. The skin was smooth, leaving a little scar that would soon fade over time. He always knew his big brother's sewing skill was superb. He didn't have to worry about the gash turning into ugly scar anymore.

Mikey glanced at Leo who was curling on his side. Usually, Leo, the master of ninjitsu, was a light sleeper. The fact that he didn't even stir when Mikey was awake bothered him a bit. Was he very tired? Or there was something wrong with him? Leo shifted a little as he leaned closer to Leo's head

Despite the sound of heavy rain hitting on the truck roof, Mikey could hear the name that escaped from Leo's lips.

"Raph…"

Oh.

So that's why he didn't wake up. He's dreaming.

He tried to get closer without waking him as if he wanted to get into Leo's dream world.

"...Mikey…"

Ha! I'm in his dream too. I wonder what's he dreaming about? But if there's us in his dream then maybe it's a good dream?

Then he heard Leo ground his teeth with his eyes closed, frowning and sweating in his sleep.

Umm… maybe not very good dream…?

So it wasn't only him who had the nightmare. He didn't know what to do. He could snuggle on him but he preferred to do it when his brother was awake. One thing he had learned was that he shouldn't sneak up on Leo when he was asleep because he would get unpleasant result afterward, like getting a punch in the face. But before Mikey could do anything, the clicking sound echoed from the road behind them, not too loud yet deafening them with fear.

That was when Leo snapped his eyes open, nearly collided his head with Mikey's when he got up. Mikey grabbed Leo's arm, shrinking himself behind his brother's shell. Their eyes darted in the darkness and caught a staggering step from a lonely clicker. It didn't care about them, perhaps there was too much noise as it was still raining. The sound of its pace was coming closer. Mikey held his breath as it passed by the trunk.

It was unusual to meet clicker far from the town. Normally, clicker would stay near the populated city because sometimes living people got infected and turned into one of them. This lost clicker was walking out of nowhere. He felt Leo shifted as the clicking sound haunted them.

He tried to remember the theory in zombie science that the moment people turned into zombie, living soul was gone (he read it from some website that was less authentic than Wikipedia but he didn't care because he wanted to believe it). The person who was inside was already gone, already moved on to the better place.

The image of the boy flashed before his eyes, he quickly buried his face in his brother's shell. He wondered if Sam was at peace.

The lonely clicker staggered away and continued its demise on the empty road ahead. Mikey's gaze followed its shadow until it was out of his sight. He thought it looked so lonely, and he wanted at least to wave at it as a goodbye.

But then he realized he didn't have to because it was already gone, its soul and body.


Mikey was tired.

Leo and he didn't get enough sleep yesterday. Last night they met the first clicker and they were anxious more would come. On the bright side, it could mean that the next town was close.

His big brother climbed on the truck to see the direction, then he saw the town ahead. Mikey wasn't sure he should be happy or not. The next town might be full of supplies and clickers. But he really needed the tent. It would be so much better to have camping tools. At least it would make him feel like they were on vacation.

He glanced at Leo who was looking at the map intently as he led the way. Mikey knew Leo was usually quiet and difficult to read. Most of the conversation he had was always with Raph, and half of them turned into arguments. Now Leo didn't have someone to argue with so he was mostly quiet. And it was Mikey who initialed the talk. The more he talked, the more he knew that Leo hid something beneath his stoic mark. Maybe Leo tried to stay strong for both of them. He was technically their leader, after all, even if they were only two of them.

But he wanted Leo to talk, to tell him what he had on his mind. No use to rush him anyway, Mikey could wait. When Leo was ready, he would tell him since he didn't have anyone else to talk to.

So he reached out to hold his big brother's hand.


Leo was immediately tensed.

The words from afar hit him when Mikey's hand touched his.

- said I'm too old to hold his hand - Maybe you should do it with him again.

His own nightmare resurfaced, bringing him back to the radio tower, red liquid on his hands. He stood still as he shook his head. When he opened his eyes again the tower was gone, but he was back where the purple liquid was on the floor, behind him the giant blender was glowing and spinning at high speed. Something wet fell on him. He startled at the bright blue liquid splattered on his hand, he would get the second mutation and it was all his fault -

"Leo?"

He gasped as his mind was back at the empty street under the sunlight. Mikey was looking at him as if he grew another head. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes to calm down.

"We should reach the town before noon. Come on."

He tentatively pulled his hand out of Mikey's grip, pretending to grab the map with both hands. As Leo walked away he could feel Mikey's disappointment in the air, but he chose to ignore him, focusing on walking faster.

This world, this place, it messed him up. He had to escape this nightmare as soon as possible.


Mikey was a little bit unhappy.

What's wrong with holding hand? He thought. Yesterday you were fine when I cuddled you, now you don't want me to even touch you?

Leo kept walking and didn't say anything, leaving Mikey followed him and secretly pouted at him.

Fine. I can wait, He yawned. I caaaaaan wait for a long time until you're ready to tell me your nightmare.


They were walking in the town, bigger than the last one they visited. The architecture was different too. Dark orange buildings setting like a row of Lego blocks. The tall grass covered the walking path but it wasn't a problem since they didn't want to walk around the town, they just wanted to get into the building.

But Mikey thought he should be concerned about surrounding. It was too quiet, no humans or clickers. His six sense told him that there was something weird here, and his sense was always correct. His squint eyes caught something not so transparent on the both side of the wall, blocking their way. The wire? Why do they bind the thin wire to block the way? It doesn't seem effective. But his instinct told him not to touch it. They could still crawl under it, though. He glanced at Leo who didn't seem to notice it.

"Umm, Leo?"

Leo didn't hear him even if he was behind him. This is weird, Mikey thought and tried again.

"Leonardo?"

The power of full name didn't work on him, or Leo didn't hear him, again. He moved closer to his brother and took a peek over his shoulder. The voice in his head yelled at him, telling him to do something. Leo was only a meter before hitting the wire so he grabbed the top of his brother's shell and pulled back.

"Stop! SU-TO-PU! Yame! You'll hit it, bro."

Leo was confused for a moment before glaring back at Mikey.

"What the shell, Mikey?"

He meekly pointed at the wire in front of them. It took a few moments until Leo could see it. His brother blinked, mumbled something to himself.

"Oh."

"Oh? Just oh? Are you serious? How can you miss the simple trap like that? I'm sleepy head here and I still can see it." He knew he was babbling, but he thought it was appropriate because he needed it, he needed to relieve his stress. "What's wrong with you? You cannot see? Did something happen to your eyes? Or… or… you can't see because mushroom is growing on your head!?"

Leo rolled his eyes, giving him a look that meant 'you're the best example of exaggeration'. "Mikey, stop. I'm fine."

"Then why didn't you see the trap? You didn't even hear my warnings!"

Leo bit his lip. Mikey guessed he was trying to come up with an excuse. Oh man, excuse? Really? When did Leo act like Mikey? He never gave a lecture to his brothers, basically because he was the one who mostly got it.

Then the light bulb shone in his head.

He becomes distracted again, like he did on the bridge, like when he fell into this dimension…

He tilted his head, trying to figure out what was wrong with Leo. Physically, he was fine (and no mushrooms, thank god). So he thought the problem must be inside his head.

Leo ran a hand over his face, averting his eyes. "Sorry. I'm just ...tired."

Even Mikey could tell he was lying, every family member knew Leo was a terrible liar. But he wouldn't press him, he could wait. Mikey's next word was soft.

"I know we haven't had enough sleep yesterday. Maybe today we can get rest early?"

Leo nodded, still not looking at him. "Yes, I agree. I think we found enough supplies. Let's find a safe place for tonight."

"Before we do that, can I test this trap? I want to know what will happen if I touch it..."

His big brother swatted his hand. "Stop. It's a bomb trap. See the black box on the wall? If you set it off, it'll explode."

"So, ugh, we should leave it alone?"

Leo sighed and rubbed his temple. Mikey actually smiled at him because it meant his brother was back to be himself again.

"Let's go."

His voice was clipped, leaving no place to argue which was fine with him. But Leo still didn't hold his hand. Ugh, fine.


Finding a secure place was a challenge. They had to look out for humans and clickers. A few times they ran into clickers but those things just stood still since there was no noise to attract them. They couldn't spare them, of course, so Leo quickly took care of them. Mikey still felt sorry for them, but he reminded himself that their souls were already gone.

This building in front of them looked intact, the windows were tightly closed, and the door was well built. When they entered the building, they found a lot of supplies here, like humans regularly came here and stocked it. Mikey enjoyed searching for camping equipment for their journey, while Leo had a suspicion about this place.

"Whoa… I found a tent!"

Leo shook his head at his little brother who was running around the room. "Looks like you enjoy shopping."

"Definitely. Look! They have crackers! This is what I called real food!"

"Don't make a loud noise. We don't know when will they come back." Leo warned him before entering the next room. His body tensed when he saw stuff inside. Mikey ran to him and took a peek over his shoulder.

"Someone's setting an army here," Leo breathed, keeping his voice low.

They walked carefully to the gun racks. Some gun parts waiting for assembling were on the table. After a few minutes, Leo examined a familiar gun in his hand and called Mikey. "Come to look at this."

"Is that… Kraang's laser gun?" Mikey looked too cheerful for someone who saw enemy's gun. Who would have thought we'll be happy to see Kraang's stuff? "I know it! This is one of Fireflies' hideout, and this place is where they keep their guns."

Leo wasn't easily convinced. "If this is really their place, there should be more laser guns. But there's only one here, I checked. It looks quite old compared to other guns. Maybe they stole it from the Kraang."

Mikey was discouraged. "So… this place isn't owned by Fireflies?"

"Seems that way. I bet the hunters stole this gun from them." Leo grunted. He began to hate those hunters. "Keep looking. Maybe there's more info about this place."

"Leo, look!"

Mikey pointed at the blackboard behind the gun racks. There were chalk writing and notes pinned on it, showing the list of goods and the route to escape out of the town.

"This town is the part of gun trafficking. That's why they set up many traps. They prevent intruders from coming to this building," Leo asserted, the realization drew to him finally. "Hey, at least we know we're on the right track. We're getting closer to the Kraang."

"Yeah, but… no Fireflies here..." Mikey gulped. Suddenly sleeping under the truck roof sounded more appealing than sleeping in the town where bad humans were around.


They decided to spend the night outside the town.

Leo was anxious that humans may come back anytime, and he didn't want to face more clickers today. Mikey didn't object, though he spent a long time in the weapon room to find something related to the Kraang. Sadly, he didn't find anything.

At the exit to the open-air storage, Leo was about to open the door to go out. Mikey squinted his eyes as he saw some weird rope on the door knob. It looked like one of the tricks he had seen on TV…

Then he realized it was the trap. This town was full of traps he wanted to cry.

"LEO!"

"Ahhh!"

It was too late. Leo already opened the door and stepped on the lasso on the ground, triggering the snare trap. There was a loud bang as the heavy crate fell to the ground, the other end of rope caught his leg and pulled him up in the air. As Leo struggled while the rope was pulling him, the back of his head hit the old fridge nearby. The unexpected blow sent him to unconscious.

"LEO!"

Mikey, who was still on the ground, tried to call him again. Leo's limp form was up in the air, at least ten feet from the ground. His gray cloak tangled with his arms. When his brother didn't respond, he was panicked.

Is he dead? No! Don't die! Answer me!

"Leo! Answer me! Say something! Are you okay!? I'll get you down. Just wait a minute-"

He was going to get under him when the katana slipped from the scabbards and hit the ground below with a loud clank! That was when he realized he was now truly alone. But he didn't have to wait for long for another company. The familiar clicking sounds were coming to his direction. Oh what to do, what to do!? Mikey swallowed. He was alone, he had to deal with it alone.

It ran to him with full speed. Still in shock, he didn't have time to get his nunchucks. But his reflective move worked in time to spin kick it.

"Stay away from him!" Mikey shouted at it, but it was a mistake. More noise meant more of them coming.

What to do? What should I do!?

Leo's still form was above his head, groaning but not waking up. At least he was hanging upside down high in the air, clickers couldn't reach him. Mikey grabbed his nunchucks nervously. He needed to lure them away from Leo and the warehouse.

It's no big deal. I fought those things before in the open area. I'll be fine.

"Alright, mushroom head. You want a piece of me? Come and get me!"

The sickle pierced through the air and landed directly on its head, then he yanked the chain the swung its body to outside. A few clickers were running to the warehouse where the loud noise occurred previously like they already pinpointed the location of the noise. Mikey bit his lip, his taunt wasn't enough. They were heading to the warehouse anyway. He couldn't risk staying near Leo. He had to get away from this place, not too close to Leo but not too far from him in case he needed to run back. He switched nunchucks back and beat one of clicker in the face to get out.

For some reason, he thought about screaming to attract them. High pitch scream would work, but he needed to cover all range of sound. Once he stood on the street he cleared his throat, making his voice deep and sang loudly (it was off-key, of course).

"HUWAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH…! Yeahyeahyeaheeeeeyeeeaaaah!"

There was an eerily silent moment. Everything on the ground stopped moving, even clickers. The sound came out like a death metal screaming. Mikey was about to continue, and his audiences(?) stood still as if to wait for his song, but then he scratched his head.

"Aww, I forget lyric."

The moment had passed.

The song questionably worked.

Those clickers turned to him, trying to find his location using clicking noise from its head. Mikey was far from happy when he found himself to be the center of attention.

"Easy clicker, nice clicker. Why do the bad guys always follow me!?" He started running from the horde. "Chill, pals. Can we talk about it over coffee?! No?"

They followed him, which was good because Leo would be safe for a while. But what about him? Now that he could lure them away he had to come up with the plan. Mikey used a smoke bomb to get ahead of them when they ran too close to him. He ran and shouted at them all the way.

"You ugly pizza topping! You disgrace all your neighbor toppings. Caramelized onions, fontina, and rosemary are ashamed of you!"

It was easy just to lure them away, but at the same time, he had to keep distance with them. He was practically running around the town, attracting more clickers along the way. Another smoke bomb was used. Mikey began to get tired, but he kept running. His destination was the bomb trap they found earlier,

"You are the worst topping ever! I don't want to hate you but you give me no choice." He shouted one last time and used the grappling hook to get to the rooftop. Those clickers were still running to his direction. He mocked a sad face. "Goodbye, my love. I'll remember you. Wild mushroom topping will always be in my heart."

When the bomb exploded, he didn't wait around to see the result. But he saw some splash making the way high to the rooftop like a fountain. Not really pleasant view, so he focused on getting back to his brother.

"Leo!"

Leo regained consciousness finally, he groaned. "...What happened?"

Mikey looked up at him and giggled. "You took a nap like a bat, dude. Get it? You're hanging upside down."

"Really…?"

"Yeah, and you missed my concert." Mikey's words began to make no sense to him. Leo decided not to ask about it while Mikey helped to get him down. "You okay?"

"Yes… How long I was out of the game?"

"Not too long. I can handle them. But please, please don't do something like this again. I thought you're a goner for a sec."

He wouldn't say it was un-Leo-like to fall to the trap like that, he didn't need to because it already showed in Leo's expression. "I'm sorry..."


Mikey planed to get him to talk.

He knew he could wait, but when he saw Leo today he thought he couldn't wait for him to come around. He had to do something.

They were staying out of the town, residing back on the main road, leaving the town behind. Mikey set up the tent and built a campfire, getting excited that it was like a vacation to him. The rest was to persuade Leo to join him. But like the other night, Leo's presence seemed to be far away from him.

Mikey turned to see his brother who was sitting on the top of the abandoned car, looking at the emptiness on the road. The moonlight outlined his form under the cloak, his hood tugged down. Leo touched the bump on the back of his head, looked upset. He decided to cut the chase and climbed to sit near him. Leo shut his eyes and didn't say anything. His heart sank a little. Mikey just wanted to tell him that he didn't blame Leo, so he poked his arm.

"I'm tired of waiting, Leo. Something bothers you for a while. You have to tell me."

Leo hugged his knees. "I don't know… I can't explain it..."

"I know you have a nightmare, I have one too. You can tell me about it." When Leo didn't respond, he used the triumph card. "You promised to tell me everything, remember?"

It seemed Leo was having a battle inside his head, hugging his knees tight and shutting him out. Mikey pouted when his trick didn't work. Leo must have an awful nightmare if he didn't want to share with him.

So who's he gonna share with? Mikey wondered, then the lightbulb once again shone in his head.

How can I forget one person that Leo wishes to see the most?

He sat on the floor in lotus style beside him, tying a plastic rope on his chin to make a Japanese goatee. Leo was busy staring at the ground, so when Mikey called him he blinked at his transformation.

Hesitatingly, Leo asked. "Umm, Mikey, what are you doing?"

Mikey closed his eyes and put his hands on his lap, shifting a bit so he could face his brother. "What do you think I'm doing, son?"

"What?"

He used all of his self-restraint not to laugh at Leo's expression. His brother's eyes were as large as pancake. Not now, Mikey. You can do it again at the lair. Right now you need to focus. He thought, lifting his right hand in front of them.

"Give me your hand, son. So we can be connected through the spiritual thingy in our bodies."

"...Are you imitating Master Splinter?"

"No. Nuh-uh. Don't be silly, son"

Even with eyes closed, he still felt Leo's gaze piercing through him, judging him. But he won't back down easily. Trying his best to pretend meditating, he told himself this wasn't a prank, this was the only way to let his brother talk to him.

"Tell me what troubles you, son." He made sure to add emphasis on 'son'. Mikey hoped he had pulled all his father's resemblance just to make his brother relax. When he didn't hear a response, he cracked one eye open. Leo was sitting with legs crossed, staring at his right hand as if he was nervous to place his own hand on his. Finally, he conceded. Leo sighed, wondering why he did it but decided to play along.

"I.. err…"

Mikey shut his eyes again and remained still as much as possible. He squeezed his brother's hand a bit as an encouragement.

It took several minutes before Leo spoke again.

"I hate getting used to kill."

Mikey internally asked what? but he kept his calm look. It was better to let Leo spoke, interrupting him might stop him completely.

Besides, I'm curious about what he'll tell me.

"I… Master Splinter told us we shouldn't kill unless we have no choice. He teaches Ninjitsu to allow us to protect ourselves, not to kill humans, not to take pleasure in killing. And yet I've aimed to kill them… intentionally."

He heard Leo sighed again. "He also said 'do not hesitate' so I didn't. I'm afraid that if I didn't get them first, they would kill us. And I… I was going to kill Sam because he hurt you. It's wrong, he was our friend and little brother. But I couldn't let him kill you. You're my little brother too. I have to choose between you and him."

He remembered it too well and slightly shuddered at that memory, but it subsided quickly. Leo's confession was his priority. Mikey opened his eyes, holding Leo's hand with both hands. "Leo, it's not wrong. That person isn't Sam anymore."

Leo shook his head, looking at everywhere but him.

"And I made a lot of mistakes. I thought I alone could take them down. I don't want to risk your life. I keep thinking about space and the world after we get back but I don't know another way to do it without sacrificing someone."

Oh… so this is back to space? This is the reason behind his heroic act. Wow, he's going to tell me everything. I should be happy, right?

Now Leo was squeezing his hands, bowing his head down until his beak touched Mikey's open palms. His voice muffled.

"I don't trust myself anymore. What if I make a wrong decision? What if we die because of me? I keep making mistakes. I fell into the portal because of my carelessness. More importantly, I failed you..."

Somewhere in the middle of Leo's long monolog, Mikey frowned. "Huh? Me?"

"If I wasn't distracted, the Kraang wouldn't shoot at me, we would have won the fight and then went back to the lair to have pizza together. Because I brought us here, you almost got killed many times. If it isn't because of me..."

"I would have died for real."

Leo looked up abruptly with panic in his eyes, mouth parted, and shook his head as if to say he didn't want to hear that word. He looked scared. It was the unusual sight. Leo, scared? Not in a million years. His brother didn't have trouble fighting clickers when they first came to this dimension. Mikey thought that would be a question for another time. He tapped his chin, making his goatee swaying back and forth.

"So that's the reason why your concentration is on and off sometimes. It seems you can't take my advice to your heart: focus on finding the way home. You can't keep thinking about things in the past that we can't do anything to fix it. When you're thinking, you can't focus. We have to let some of them go."

It was a second time Leo averted his eyes. Perhaps his brother remembered this speech that he said before they moved out of New York city.

"Buuut 'cause you're my bro I can't say I didn't expect this. You will be you, no matter what I said."

"I'm sorry..."

Mikey held his palm up.

"You totally forget that I will always be me too, the Mikester, Dr. Prankenstein, annnnd..." He leaned closer to hug his brother. Ha! Hug can cure anything! "Your cute little brother."

Leo exhaled softly on his shoulder. He took it as a cue to continue.

"We're learning to be brothers again, not just a leader and follower. We are team, and best siblings ever."

Leo closed his eyes, slowly wrapping his arms around him and whispered. "How can you stay strong after what we've been through?"

"I'm not strong, not brave too." Mikey let go first but his hands still held Leo's shoulders firmly. "But I have the best big bro in the world and I just looked up at him."

His brother blushed slightly. Mikey let out a small laugh and said with a calm tone, one that Leo usually used to comfort him. Now he was just returning a favor.

"Since you can't let go of your thoughts, and I don't think I can make you leave them. I guess there's only one choice left," Mikey inhaled and exhaled quietly. He wanted to tell it to Leo for a long time. "Just talk to me. Tell me everything. Tell me what is wrong. Even if I can't fix it for you but I'll listen. I'll always be here for you. You can order me to shut up and hear you out anytime."

They were staring at each other, not moving, not letting go of their hands. But Leo tilted his head a bit when Mikey leaned closer as he whispered.

"And don't worry, I promise I won't tell Raph."

Finally, Leo looked at him. A tiny smile worked its way across his face and into his eyes.

"Hai, sensei."

Mikey blinked, then he remembered he still had the plastic rope on his chin. He giggled as he removed it. "Oh man, I was sooo out of the character."

"You're doing great as sensei, Mikey."

He felt Leo's hands behind his neck. Slowly, his brother drew them together until their foreheads touched. Leo closed his eyes and sighed.

"Thank you."

At least he did it, he felt like he was getting closer to big brother who he should have been closed sixteen years ago. But it didn't matter, today could be their starting point. He didn't care. Mikey stuck his tongue out playfully. But his eyes widened when Leo smiled and returned the same gesture. Mikey leaned back and stared at him.

"W-What?" Leo stuttered, thinking he did something wrong.

And then Mikey grinned and launched at him, making him yelp and fell on his shell. Mikey laughed as he tickled his brother. The horde of clickers could hear his laughter for all he cared.


P.s. the last scene is inspired by Neofox.

P.s.s. I would like to try caramelized onion...