{Hey guys I know its been a while but, I managed to get a way to watch Sons of Anarchy and I am going to start updating everything. Super, Super sorry! As usual I do not own Sons of Anarchy only my own character and anything else you do not recognize}
I don't know how long me and Happy had sat there with him rubbing my back with one hand and his other running through my hair. My tears had run dry but, I didn't want to leave his arms. This was the safest I had felt in a long time. But, like everything in my life it had to end at some time. Happy's hold on me had loosened on me and his hand grasped my chin and tilted it to look at him. "I love sitting here with you but, we should go back in." He whispered
"Please don't leave me." My voice cracked with the fear
His eyes searched mine before he leaned in to kiss me. I closed my eyes and let him lead. I felt like such a child asking him what I did but, I was scared and so lonely. Once he pulled away, he looked at me again without letting go of me, "I told you I wasn't going anywhere." He leaned in and kissed my forehead
He shifted me in his lap before he placed his arms under my knees and supported my back as well. He stood up pulling me tight to his chest before beginning to walk towards the house. When we came in the house Clay and Gemma were no longer there and he walked towards my bedroom. Once we were in, he closed the door slowly and walked to the bed laying me down beside my daughter. After I crawled under the blankets, I watched as he walked towards the other side crawling in as well. I turned on my side to face him, my daughters back was facing me and my hand laid on top of Stella. Happy reached for my hand cradling my small hand in his big one. This felt right, it finally felt right. He squeezed my hand, "I love you Savannah." He whispered
"And I love you."
He pulled my hand to his lips giving it a gentle kiss before placing it back. I shuffled close to him and my daughter and as I felt my eyes become heavy I aloud myself to fall asleep without the fear of the nightmares. I was safe with Happy beside me and I felt loved. Not scared and not alone but, loved and safe.
~~SOA~~
(Happy p.o.v.)
I didn't want to leave either of my girls this morning but, when Clay peaked his head in to tell me that we had to go to the Clubhouse for church. I knew I had to go, it was about Savannah and Gemma and I had to be there as much as I didn't want to hear it again. As much as I wanted to find Zobelle and hurt him, kill him until he was 6 feet under then bring him back from the dead just to do it all over again. I had never felt so angry in my whole life. The killer in me was just begging to be let loose. But I had to reign it in and go to church not for Gemma, not for the club or out of duty but, for Savannah.
Once we got all the members rounded up, we headed straight in to church. Once everyone was seated, we immediately got into it and Bobby was the first to speak up "Guessing this has to do with the patches being back on your kute?"
Jax leaned on the table farther and looked me dead in the eye, "Yeah, I'm not going nomad."
"That's good Jackie boy." Chibs smiled at him
"Just listen up." Jax said as he shifted in his seat and looked at the table
I crossed my arms across my chest knowing what was coming and really not wanting to live through this again. It was quiet for a few minutes before Clay began to tell everyone what happened, "The night of Bobby's party…Gemma didn't drive into that barricade and Savanah wasn't taking care of Stella. Gemma was jumped and Savannah as well. On eighteen and took her to the utility house with Zobelle's crew and gave them a message to deliver. Stop selling guns," Clay paused, and I could tell he was struggling to get it out. My eyes fell on Tig, I was curious to know how much she told him, "They raped Gemma and force fed enough crank to embolize Savannah for hours and forced her to watch."
Clay stopped speaking to allow what he said to sink in. The members all reacted in different ways and I had to squeeze my arms to stop myself from loosing myself all over again. I continued to watch Tig and judging by the shock on his face, he knew nothing of the truth of that night. Tig was the first to say something, "Jesus Clay…Hap…I'm so sorry."
My eyes shifted to Clay and I watched as he gritted his teeth, "One of them was Weston."
The tension in the room was insane, "So what do we do?" Opie asked the room
"We get bloody, we chop their god damn heads off." Chibs was the first to offer up a suggestion and I could agree more
Judging by the agreements in the room I wasn't the only one who felt that way. But I knew that Clay was going to intervene as much as I wanted to rip every person who was involved to pieces with an excessive amount of bullet holes, we had to be smart about our moves. We were in a game of chess, "No!" Clay shouted over everyone
"We ain't never seen an assault like this and as much as I would like to cut their hearts out. Showed force just puts us back in jail. We got to do what they been doing. You know find a weakness and unravel them." Jax tried to explain for Clay
"And until then nobody reacts. You see Zobelle, you see Weston, you see any of the crew you swallow the urge to kill them and walk on. Understood?" Clay interrupted to finish the point as he pointed his finger to every person in the room
Some members nodded their hand in understanding and others looked shocked whether that was still from the news of what happened or because they couldn't retaliate, I wouldn't know. "We gotta get our hands on some guns, company is bare." Bobby offered up a suggestion
"Its been low since the immigration stuff, it will be weeks before we see any of that shit." Clay spoke up
"We got to tap our personal stock. Everyone bring in what you got." Jax ordered
Clay hit the table and stood up to signal that the conversation was done. Everyone filed out after him and I went straight for the bar grabbing a shot glass and filling it with whiskey before I shot it back. I was pouring myself another one before my eyes caught the movement in front of me. I looked up to see Tig, I knew I would eventually have to talk to him. I hit him without knowing the full facts, I jumped to conclusions. He tried to tell me that it wasn't like that. I doubted a brother, one that I owed a thank you to for taking care of her. I grabbed another glass and filled it with the amber liquid. "Thank you." I told him after we took our shots
"No need to thank me brother. I would have done it for anybody but, if I had known exactly what happened I would have told you." Tig told me with sympathy in his eyes
"I know. Listen brother Im sorry about the other day." I apologized knowing he would know what I meant
"I lived." Tig shrugged his shoulders.
I know that Tig was just trying to put the past exactly where is belonged but, it bugged me that I attacked him because I had assumed the wrong thing. But, right now we had bigger things to take care of, I had some assholes who deserved the grave I was going to dig for them.
(End of Happy .)
~~SOA~~
When I had woken up, I woke up to Stella grabbing my hand and pulling hard. "Come on mama! I'm hungry!" She shouted
My eyes fluttered open and after I adjusted to light, I looked to Stella with warm eyes. I didn't see Happy but, I had a feeling I knew where he was. But my eyes did find a little folded piece of paper on the night table on the side of the bed where he had slept. I smiled at Stella as she continued to pull at me before I reached forward and grabbed her pulling her tight to me as I switched spots with her. Pinning her down under me and tickling her in all the spots I know. She giggled uncontrollably and tried to squirm away from me, "I got you!" I laughed with her
"Stop…Please…. Mama stop!" She begged me in-between her fits of laughter
I grabbed her hands instead this time and pulled her up to me again and kissed her face a couple times. "Okay sweetheart you go to the kitchen and I will be right there." I told her
She hugged me quickly before she took off to the kitchen. I sat back down in the bed and reached over to the note. I opened and smiled as I read
'I wish I didn't have to leave. But, don't go anywhere I've got a surprise for you. Stay with Gemma, stay safe.'
That man could be so sweet when he wanted to be. I placed the note back down and grabbed the first hoodie I could find, ironically it was the one Happy was wearing yesterday, and I walked out to join my daughter. I walked into the kitchen and saw Gemma making breakfast with Stella sitting on the counter beside her. I walked up to Stella and kissed her on her forehead before I laid a hand on Gemma shoulder. She placed her hand over mine and I squeezed, an understanding passing between us. "What's gramma making sweetheart?" I asked Stella as I grabbed a coffee cup from the cupboard and started to poor myself a cup
"Pancakes!" she shouted excitedly
I smiled and looked at her with a smile on my face, "Pancakes you say?"
I didn't think she could smile any bigger but, she proved me wrong as she hummed her response to me. I leaned against the counter as I looked at Gemma. She may have smiled at my daughter and amused her in the meantime but, I could see how tense she was, worse than she had been all night. I felt like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders. But what Gemma went through was worse than me. It couldn't have been easy telling my father what had happened to her. Gemma dished up my daughter and I tried not to laugh as I watched her wolf down her food faster then I had seen anyone ever eat. If I didn't know better, I would say she hadn't eaten in weeks. I looked around and didn't see my father so I could only assume that I was right this morning, they were at the clubhouse. "When did they leave?" I asked Gemma as I looked at the clock on the stove to see that it was just after nine in the morning
"Early…maybe over an hour ago." She replied as she sipped from her coffee
"Church?"
"Yeah."
"It was the right thing. To tell them the truth." I tried to comfort her
"No, it wasn't. But it needed to be done for your sake and Jax's." She wouldn't look at me as she said that, she just kept looking at my daughter
I pursed my lips really wanting Gemma to understand the good that would come from this for her sake to. But I knew right now she did not want to here it. She felt like she was backed into a corner with only one option to get out. "Mama?" Stella's voice reached my ears
I pulled my eyes from Gemma and smiled at my daughter once more, "Yes sweetheart?" I replied
"I'm done." She said as she swung her legs between the chair
"You are excused. Go wash your hands and you can play with you toys in the living room while I visit with gramma." I told her
She started to run from the table, and I held my hand out to stop her. She looked from me to Gemma confused before I pointed to the table. "Sorry." She said quickly as she realized she left her plate behind
She ran back to the table and brought her plate to the counter beside the sink. I placed it into the sink or her as she ran past me. Once Stella was out of ear shot, I looked to Gemma again, "Gemma why can't you believe this is a good thing?"
She sighed and instead of answering me she walked into her dinning room and sat at the head of her table. I sat beside her where I could see Stella as she played with her toys. Once I saw Stella wander in to play with her toys, I looked to Gemma expectantly. "Savannah listen to me. I told you that no good would come from telling them this. Happy is back in your arms yes but, at what cost. My husband, your father knows but again at what cost. I know my boys and I know that no good will come from this and the cost will be higher than the gain." Gemma explained to me as she lit a smoke.
I knew what she was talking about was most likely the truth or at least a portion. Ever since what happened Gemma had been more down and secluded. She had been in this life a lot longer then me but, it didn't mean that some good wouldn't come from this. I leaned forward and took her hand in mine, "Gemma look at it this way. It may have brought out the worst or the worst may be coming as you said. But at the end of every storm there is sunshine right? It may not look very promising now but, Clay still loves you, no one else needs or will get hurt by that son of a bitch and you protected what was yours and Jax has stayed home and isn't going nomad. There will be good at the end we just got to get through the shit first."
Her eyes were connected with mine and she opened her mouth to say something, but a knock came to the door first. She sucked on her smoke her eyes still never left mine and as she exhaled, she pulled her hand from mine and leaned back in the chair, "Its open." She answered to the knock on the door
After a second Tara walked in and smiled at me before she sat at the table, "Hey." She greeted us
"Hey." Gemma greeted back
I gave her a slight wave and leaned back in my chair to drink my coffee. The air was thick and as Gemma sat there twirling her cigarette in her hand and staring at it, Tara did what I had already tried, "Doing okay?"
"Sure."
Tara looked at me and I just shook my head. She had no need to ask me the question she knew how I had been from the beginning it was Gemma we had to worry about. "Its brave doing what you two did." Tara condoned us
Gemma took another pull from her cigarette as I looked to my daughter who was in her own little world no wiser to the harsh world, we were living in. "Had to be done. Snap Jax and Clay out of their bullshit. Stopped Happy and Tig from ripped each other to shreds." Gemma's words pulled me back to their conversation
"Had to be done for the both you. Do you want to talk about it?" Tara tried going down the same road I had
I shook my head, "She doesn't believe it should have been done for her. She did it for all of us, that's what she believes." I told Tara a little upset that Gemma couldn't see what that secret had been doing to her to
Gemma sat forward as she began to put out her smoke, "That's enough of that, there is nothing to talk about. Clay's never going to want to be inside something that's been ripped up like me." Gemma said solemnly
My mouth almost dropped at what she said. If my dad claimed to love Gemma as much as he said, then that shouldn't matter. For fuck sakes he should want to take away that pain, that feeling of being violated by another man. Make her forget and him that anyone ever touched what was his. Hell, if Stella wasn't in my room last night, I was sure that Happy would have made love to me all night just to take away both our pain. "Jesus Christ Gemma Clay loves you." Tara spoke the words I wanted to say as I freaked out a little inside
"Love don't mean shit. Men need to own their pussy…his has been violated. He'll find another that's what they do." Gemma spoke what we both knew was really hurting her
"Gemma, I know I may not have known my dad as long as you but, whether he loves you or not. You are his he would always want to be with you. We both know he would fight tooth and nail to make sure you were in his arms at night. If he could have protected, you that night he would have."
Again, Gemma didn't have words to answer mine. I don't know if she was ignoring me or didn't want to listen to the sense that I was giving her but, it was starting to get on my nerves. The thought of Happy ever finding another woman to fill his needs just because he could stand to be inside me seriously pissed me off. It would be a discussion I would have with him later. Gemma didn't want to hear it anymore and she stood up and walked away from us. Going straight to her room before she closed the door and I looked back at Tara. "Has she been like this all morning?" Tara asked me
"For as long as I have been up, yeah. I tried to talk some sense into her before you got here but, as you can see, I didn't get anywhere." I told her
"What do you think about what she said about Clay?"
I looked to my daughter again as I drug my finger around the rim of my cup. "I hope my father has sense to see that it isn't like that. That he needs to show her that he still loves her in a physical and emotional way. I'll talk to my dad but, for now we need to let her be. Telling her the shit she doesn't want to here isn't going to help her heal….my dad is the only one who could do that now."
Tara pursed her lips and I could tell she really didn't like my answer but, she wasn't going to argue with me either.
~~SOA~~
It had been me and Stella for most of the day. Happy had given me a call earlier to tell me that he would be a little later then he thought getting back to us but, to stay put. I really didn't appreciate the orders I was being given but, I didn't want to worry him after all I knew deep down that is where that was coming from. Gemma had left almost an hour ago claiming she had somewhere she needed to go before we all met up at the clubhouse. It was just passed five o'clock when Happy finally showed up. I was just finishing up the last couple dishes as I heard the door open and Stella's happy squeals for the man I loved. I heard him grunt as he picked her up "How's my girl doing today?" He asked her
"Great. Mama played with me all day!" she said really excited
I smiled at my daughter's enthusiasm. "What did she play with you?"
"Um…barbies!" I looked over my shoulder and saw a sight that melted my heart
There stood Happy in all his bad ass-ness holding my tiny daughter in his huge arms with her tiny arms around his neck. I smiled knowing that this was the perfect picture of the perfect family that I always wanted for mine and my daughter's life. Not to mention that I could feel the warmth gathering in between my legs and I turned away quickly trying to hide my blush. Who knew that seeing Happy be so sweet to my daughter would be a turn on for me. I was so into my thoughts that I jumped a little when I felt Happy's arms wrap around my waist and pulling me into his hard chest.
I turned the water off and leaned back into him more, placing my head on his shoulder. He placed his chin on my shoulder and we stood there for a moment in a comfortable silence. But it soon ended when he squeezed me and as he pulled away, he grabbed my hand so he could pull me from the sink and towards the door. "I have a surprise I have wanted to show you for a couple months. Come on let's go." He told me with a huge smile on his face
"Okay let me just grab Stella." I told him as I pulled my hand from his
He let me pull away and I quickly gathered Stella. Slipping on her pair of shoes before I grabbed my purse and walked out with Happy. Once we got Stella in my car we followed after Happy until we reached a beautiful two story old Victorian house with red framing. It had a wide porch with a porch swing to one side. I got out with Stella and stared at the house in wonder. I didn't understand why we were here, was I going to meet someone? His mom maybe? As I stared in awe at the beautiful house, I walked around my car to unbuckle Stella and helped her out. Stella grabbed onto my hand as we both stared at the house. I heard Happy clear his throat beside me bringing me out of my stupor and I looked to him. He motioned to the house and smiled at me, "Go ahead."
I scrunched my eyebrows at him but, did as he said and pulled Stella along to the house. Once we reached the deck he reached out for the door and opened it for us. I was even more confused once the door was opened. There was not only no one in here but, there wasn't anything in here…it was empty. I walked in and waited as Happy closed the door behind me. I looked back at Happy who had a huge grin on his face, "Did you finally by a house since you're not on the road anymore?" I asked trying to figure out why I was here
He shrugged his shoulders and grabbed my free hand in his pulling me closer to him, so I was tucked into his side. Stella pulled at Happy's other hand so he leaned down to pick her up as he answered me, "You could say that. Its our new home." He said matter of factly
I looked at him shocked, did he just say ours? His smile never left his face in fact it got wider, "That is if you would move in with me?"
I looked between him and my daughter before looking at the huge room we were standing in. I probably looked like a gapping fool the way I was looking at everything. Of course, I was bursting with happiness but, this was a huge step even though in my heart I knew that I was going to follow this man to the ends of the earth, "Happy when did you do this?" I asked wondering if he had bought this house because of what happened
He looked a little sheepish as he rubbed the back of his neck, "Actually I have had it for a couple months now I just didn't know how to ask you and with everything with Stella and what happened to you and Gemma you had your hands full. I thought you would want a home with Stella that wasn't at your dads and hopefully a home with me seeing as I'm not on the road anymore. I didn't want to pressure you-" Happy began to rabble in what I was assuming was nerves
I cut him off though as I grabbed his face in my hands and kissed him hard on the lips. After a moment I pulled away with a huge smile on my face. "I love it Happy."
His nerves seemed to melt off his face at my reaction and was replaced with happiness. He leaned forward and kissed me again. During our kiss it seemed that Stella became impatient with us and her little hand tapped at my face. I giggled as I pulled away to look at my daughter, "Are you ready to go look for your new bedroom?" I asked
Her face turned to excitement as she wiggled her way out of Happy's arms and started to run around the house. When she realized we weren't following she ran back to us and grabbed both of our hands and pulled us hard towards the rest of the house. I was amazed at how big this house was there was an unfinished basement under the house and one the first level there was a big kitchen with an island and all stainless steel appliances and of course the room we started in that was the living room and a bathroom. Then there was the top level with three bedrooms, yes, I said three bedrooms all with ample space. The master suite had its own bathroom and they're was a bathroom in the hall for Stella. Once Stella had chosen her room that was directly across from mine, she squealed in excitement and ran around the room with her arms in the air like an airplane. I had snuck out to look at the third bedroom that was just down from our room but, beside Stella's room. I leaned against the door frame and looked at the empty room. Happy came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist then placed his head on my shoulder. "I thought we could make it a spare room you know, until we had a kid of our own?" he asked me
I turned to look at him man, Happy was full of surprises today, "You want a kid?" I asked almost not believing my ears
I never thought of Happy ever wanting kids, Stella was just apart of me whether he liked it or not. "I never thought I did until I met you. There is a lot of firsts with you." He laughed
I completely pulled from his arms this time so I could look at him and make sure he wasn't joking. Because honestly, I always wanted more kids but, I never thought that was in the cards with Happy and I was okay with that if it meant that I was always with the man I loved. He looked worried for a moment, "Of course not right away…but, in the future?" He asked me with hope lacing his voice
I looked back over the room I was standing in and happiness bubbled in me. "I never thought you would want to have a child but, Happy I would love that future with you." I told him as I grabbed his hand in mine
He leaned down to my level and kissed me passionately.
I would like to start off by thanking;
Legolas' Girl 31, decadenceofmysoul- thank you for your continued reviews I always appreciate them, and I hope that you enjoy this update
Cherokee Daniels- I am glad that you enjoyed those bits only more exciting things to come right? Hope you enjoy this chapter as well
nelle76- I am glad you enjoyed that I probably rewrote it at least 10 times, I wanted to get it right and I was really happy with the way I did it
abaker2291- I am really sorry about the long update but, I am back I love hearing when someone binge reads my things it makes me feel like I did something right
AMRS90- I am so sorry about the long wait I have finally figured out how to continue this story. I have so many plans for this story and as much as I try to follow the season as it was so well done, I want to change things because of course Savannah will throw in her own curves to the story
wabi-sabi1090- I thought about Hulu but unfortunately, I am in Canada and I can't get Hulu here
Guest- I apologize I am really sorry I was trying to find a way without putting the story on hold but, I didn't want you or anyone thinking I had abandoned it
butterflybitch- thank you so much for your understanding
I would also like to thank everyone who has favorited and continued to do so in my absence;
BryannaY, bookworm4life0812, MademoiselleRiddle, HBanana412, DemonQueen8787, AMRS90, , Vampirress101, Caly82, Ellevarnes, caitlander, dukedk
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UNTIL NEXT TIME!
