Chapter 9 : Tears.

Cargo Hold: 17:25 hours

All away members were already on the cargo deck when Shepard got there, even Garrus. Shepard looked at each one and realized just how much they had changed. Each one in turn seemed to stand a little taller when his gaze fell on them. This was a team, solid and formidable. He was proud of them.

Moving forward of the holds control consoles he stood at ease waiting for the shuttle to set down.

Once down the shuttles hatch opened showing an unusual site. Tali, Kasumi and Legion standing on the chairs and bent over so they were basically laying their top half's on the being in front of them. The fact that there was no other room left in the shuttle did not lesson the laughter that came from the gathered team.

Shepard walks up to assist first Kasumi then Tali out of the shuttle. Once Tali's feet were on the deck he embraced her and softly but firmly said "Welcome home, next time keep better contact." Stepping back and holding her at arms length he continued "Looks like you emptied that ship." Smiling he just looked at her eyes for a second then stepping back further addressed the group. "Alright, Tali will let you know where it all goes so let's get busy."

The whole cargo hold had been quiet after Shepard had hugged Tali, even after he had given his orders they all just stood there looking at the two.

Tali was shocked at Shepard's open display of affection. She just stood there staring at him, confused. Was he really that worried about me? She see's Shepard's eye's dart quickly left then back at her and suddenly remembers everyone else. Shaking herself she turns to the group of idiotically smiling team members and clears her throat.

"Okay, the green, gray and sickly yellow ones go to the upper engineering deck. The rest go to lower engineering as well as the two cases of cabling." Tali had started a little soft but ended with a strong 'I'm in charge' voice.

"Shit! Jack exclaims, "I'm not going to lose my bed to some ugly ass equipment."

"No" Tali states "Most will easily fit in the side-rails so we can have clear passages." Pausing a second she continues "Well, that is after we get the equipment hooked up. So no, um, no putting anything on the bed."

With that the party started moving. Shepard stayed with Tali as she directed the equipment. He just watched. She really is good at what she does he thought. Now if she would stop being so damned nervous around me.

After the shuttle was empty Tali said "Okay, We have a lot of work to do...well, my team does anyway. I..I'll talk to you later okay?"

"Sure Tali" he says smiling "You really think all that stuff will work?"

"Yes, Legion and I prechecked everything we brought back. It will not look pretty but it will work and get us home." Tali confidently said as they walked to the elevator. Tali just watched Shepard until the doors opened and she got off. I won't let him down she thinks.

Conference room: 18:00 hours

"Where the hell have you been?" says the Illusive man, glaring at Shepard in the hologram. "It's been over 20 hours since you ignored me and blew up the station. I should have known you didn't have the intelligence to make the right decision. That base would have secured our dominance in this galaxy."

Shepard had calmly listened then returned fire "Who's dominance? Humanity's or Cerberus's? That reaper was an abomination, hell the whole base was. Do you honestly believe I would have let that place fall into anyone's hands?"

"Shepard, you are making a habit of costing me money. With that base we could have..."

Shepard cuts him off saying "Been indoctrinated like the scientists on the reaper corpse? Created a monstrosity out of millions of lives? Learned how to enslave an entire galaxy? No, we need to find a way to beat the reapers and using their tech is not it." Taking a deep breath he continues "You don't win a war when both sides are evenly matched. You win one when you have the advantage. I plan to have that advantage."

"You want to help me fine but don't think you pull the strings, not anymore." Looking up Shepard says "Joker, lose this channel." The hologram fades away.

In his office the Illusive man sits and sips his whiskey. The base is a loss but Shepard is back. He's not our only option but no need to let him know that.

"EDI, have Ken kill the power to that thing. If there's anymore listening devices on board they have to be using that quantum thingy and I'm not giving him anymore free information." "Yes Commander, he as been notified." replies EDI.

Engineering: 20:40 hours

Gabby finishes connecting the last lead running from the propulsion controls to the salvaged feed control and starts testing. "Tali, that's it. Barring any troubles we should have all four thrusters online though we need to test for balance still."

Looking up from her panel Tali stretches her back saying "Good, start the diagnostics and schedule the tests for right after. Set them for deep mode, I want everything checked thoroughly, twice." Realizing just how tired she is she continues "Gabby, Ken it's time to break. We have all been busy today so let's just let the system run the tests. I'll set the system to alert me if anything goes wrong."

"No ma'am" states Ken. "Propulsion's offline for testing so the only thing running is power and that's my bailiwick if you please." He still felt bad about the teasing and this at least let him make some kind of amends. "You two have done enough already today and Legion here can help me if any trouble arises can't you Legion."

Legion simply states "This platform can monitor the panels and assist if needed."

"EDI, tell Joker I am sorry but we had to reset all engine data to zero again. I want a full workup both theoretical and actual data before we attempt the relay tomorrow." Tali says.

"Understood Tali, Jeff may not be too pleased having to do some of the same tests over again but he really needs the practice. This mornings evolutions were a bit sluggish." EDI replied.

Tali looks at both Ken and Legion and see's, perhaps for the first time, just two members of her team and not just a man and a geth. She had been working side by side with Legion for most of the day and never had she felt concern about it. Shepard is right, we can work together. "Thanks Ken, Legion. I dislike saying it but I'm not sure I can last much longer anyway. Goodnight." With that, she and Gabby head up to deck 3 for dinner."

Walking into the ships mess Tali notices that the few crew members there are glancing at her. She catch's fragments of conversations as well. "...new girlfriend...just friends, yeah right...just to pass the time..." She is shaken by what she can hear and embarrassed. Everyone knows? How could everyone know? Shepard! In the cargo hold, he hugged me, in front of everyone! She was even more embarrassed as she remember what he said and the look he gave her.

Gabby noticed Tali's discomfort and knew the reason. Leaning close to her head she whispers "Tali, don't pay any attention to them. In fact, don't even try to listen to them. They have even been saying things about Ken and I all day so don't worry." Smiling at Tali she says "If they aren't gossiping about someone they invent new rumors just to gossip about later.

"You and Ken?" Tali asks. She knew they were close friends but she didn't think it was that serious. Just thinking about them made her blush a little.

Gabby relates what happened in the morning and said "Who cares if they know about you and the Commander. The gossip will wind down or be replaced by something or someone else soon enough so please don't let it bother you. Anyway, its getting late and I'm ready for some rack time. Night Tali, sleep well."

Tali looks up when she hears a door open and see's Shepard walking out with Miranda. Tali watches Miranda, something seems different. Her stance is, well, not standoffish but she does not get the feeling of want either. Its as if Miranda..Oh keelah, she knows as well. Her blushing deepens.

"Thanks Miranda, seems like the Normandy is almost ready for the relay." Shepard says and he turns to see Tali. Speaking to Miranda still he says "If anything comes up, I'll be in my quarters." Calling over to Tali he says "Bedtime Tali. Tomorrow's going to be busy." He then proceeds towards the Elevator smiling to himself.

She sits there not knowing what to do. Was that an invitation? She didn't know what to think. He hugged me when I got back from the ship. He was truly concerned about me so much so he gently reprimanded me. He was right too, I should have kept him updated. Sighing, she gets up and starts to head towards her sleeper pod.

"Tali" calls Miranda "Would you mind coming into my office. I want to update the ships logs and I need your input on the engineering sections."

Sighing once more she follows Miranda and once inside begins describing the work done so far. Quietly she prays to the ancestors that Miranda will not bring up Shepard or her feelings for him.

Captains Quarters: 21:50 hours

"Oh well" Shepard says aloud. He thought he had been clear enough for Tali to realize he wanted her to come up without being too obvious. They needed to talk but he didn't want to force her to do come to his cabin. When will she understand just how much she means to me. She's too damn intelligent not to see it. Well, to be fair she had a very busy and strenuous day so I bet she's dead tired.

I could always go find her but if she's that tired I better let her rest. After all, she didn't get the same amount of sleep I did last night. Best to let it go for now. we will have plenty of time after we pass the relay tomorrow. Then the fun begins. Hah, fun. Where the hell am I going to take basically a stolen star ship to get repaired? What space dock will allow us entry with a geth and an unshackled AI aboard?

Leaning back in his chair, his injured side causes him to wince. Giving up for the day he strips down to his skivvies and lays down telling EDI to wake him at 07:30 hours.

Deck 3: 22:30 hours

Tali leaves Miranda's office and once more heads towards her sleep pod. Bed time she thought...bed... No, that's not what he meant. But why not? They had shared his bed twice already. True I was unconscious the second time at first but... If he wanted me there he would tell me. No, I just need sleep.

Stopping in front of her pod she activates the door and stops. Why am I so unsure? Why am I afraid? The worst he could do is ask me to leave... She reaches into the pod to grab her rucksack but her hand pauses. Now I'm being silly. He would have told me, wouldn't he? Did he? No, he was just saying goodnight. Sighing she steps into the pod and seals the door.

For a whole 5 seconds the door remained sealed.

Damn him she thought as she unsealed the pod door. I'm tired and probably not thinking straight. Fine let him laugh me out of his room. No more games, I know my feelings for him. He may not understand the significance of our...our joining earlier, but I do and he needs to as well. She steps out, grabbing her bag containing everything she owns and walks towards the elevator.

Once inside the elevator she presses deck 1. As soon as it starts to move she once more fights herself. What are you doing her mind screams. Even if he wanted you to come up he didn't say anything about moving in! The rucksack's weight reminding her of its presence. No, he already said I'm the one he cares for and he's proven it over and over again otherwise I could never have bonded to him. The doors open.

Stepping out again she pauses. This is stupid she thinks. He doesn't realize the importance of what has happened. He can't know that I have chosen him as my lifemate, he's not quarian, he doesn't know our ways. I know I can't hold him to my beliefs, my needs and I accept that. I willingly went to him knowing he might not feel the same but now I must know. I can't keep second guessing around him.

Looking at the door she brings up her omnitool. If its locked it won't be for long she thinks with resolve. Stepping forward the door smoothly opens.

The cabins lights are off and the soft glow from the fish tank illuminates the room in a soft blue. Tali enters and pauses only briefly at the top of the steps before walking down. The whole time she was watching the sleeping form of Shepard. She feels like she is intruding and almost loses her resolve.

Stepping up to the foot of the bed she quietly calls "Shep..." No, for this I use his first name. "John, John wake up." Pausing for a minute she calls again just a little louder "John please wake up. We need to talk." Opening her mouth to repeat it once more she hears his soft reply.

"I thought I was dreaming when I heard you calling me by my first name" he says as he opens his eye's. Seeing her in this light made her seem almost ethereal. Smiling he asks "You said we need to talk?" "John, before I say anything more I need to know something. I need to know if you really want me here in your cabin." she asks, her voice quivering slightly.

He hears the trembling in her voice, sees the bag on her shoulder, the stiffness in her stance as she waits to hear his answer. Softly he says "Tali, I want you by my side no matter where I am." Standing up he walks around the bed to her as she just stands there watching him. Gently he takes her bag from her shoulder and places it on the desk. Wrapping his arms gently around her he says "This is our" stressing the word "cabin now. For as long as you want it to be."

Tears burst forth from her as she wraps her arms around him, hugging him as tight as she can. Through her sobs he can hear her saying "Oh John I never wanted to be anywhere but by your side." Standing there, her head on his shoulder, she let the tears that she had held in for so long finally flow freely. They were tears of joy.