It's been too long! I apologize for the wait, but this chapter was not my friend. No matter which way I was twisting the words or changing the tone, it just wasn't coming out how I wanted it, but I finally got past that block and produced this :)
In this chapter you'll start to see the butterfly effect that Ivan creates in this story, so while I did take some lines straight from the book, things are starting to turn out differently than the book.
This can't be real, I thought. Adrian was still roaming around the room with a lazy curiosity. His hair was a mess as usual, though I got the feeling that tonight it wasn't from purposefully styling it that way. There were dark rings under his eyes, and I knew he couldn't have been completely drunk or he wouldn't be able to dream walk.
I'm not sure if I was more nervous about being in this room or being alone with Adrian. I hid my apprehension by straightening out my back and standing taller. I was on high alert, unsure of why Adrian would want to talk to me.
The extremely dark tinted windows caught Adrian's attention, and he stopped his prowl of the room to study them. He gave me a questioning glance but didn't mention them. "Where are we?" he asked again. Instead of answering his question I asked my own, "Why are we here?"
Adrian shrugged, stuffing his hands in his jean pockets to appear casual. "I sometimes let the other person's subconscious come up with the setting. I was interested to see where you would take us. What is this place?" He pulled out a box of cloves and a lighter from his pocket. I briefly wondered if smoking in a spirit dream was just as bad as the real thing.
"We're in Russia," I said, knowing that he wouldn't be able to discern too much from that answer; I did grow up there, after all. Adrian brought the cigarette to his mouth and lit it. He took a long drag before blowing the smoke out in the air between us, his eyes scrunched up as he scrutinized me. The polluted air floated in front of me but didn't have the same vulgar scent it did in the waking world.
"So I just got out of a spirit dream with Rose," he said, leaving the unfinished statement hanging over my head. Shit, I thought. God knows what Rose told him.
His casual demeanor did nothing to hide his agitation. Adrian for once looked exasperated by me, when it was usually the other way around. He wasn't just annoyed though; if I could read auras I would guess his would contain a darkness that even spirit couldn't conjure.
"She may have let it slip that you are no longer in West Virginia. She also mentioned the names Sonya Karp, Victor Dashkov, Robert Doru, even some Zeklos guy? Are you planning on taking in every fugitive and Strigoi you can find to start a band?" Adrian paused, letting the words hang in the air just like the poisonous smoke that came from his cigarette. I had no reason to believe Adrian would keep this information to himself.
For all I knew, he already got word to Zmey somehow that his daughter wasn't in her safe hiding spot. I briefly wondered how much getting castrated would hurt. Still, I didn't say anything, I simply met his hard, accusatory glare with my guardian mask.
Adrian grew impatient and twirled his hand in a motion for me to hurry up. "Well?" he asked, his voice raised more now.
"Well, what?" I asked evenly.
Adrian took another drag of the cigarette, smoke coming out of his mouth as he spoke, "What the fuck is what! We trusted you to keep Rose safe! Do you not know what that means?" He stepped closer to me, pointing at me with the cigarette pinched between his fingers. "Because I don't think a sociopathic convict and some royal tagging along with you is safe. What if he turns you in?"
I would never admit it to Adrian, but we shared the same fears. "He won't turn us in," I said with more confidence than I actually felt. "We're looking for something… someone, and Victor wants to meet this person just as badly as we do, so he needs us for now."
Adrian threw his arms up in frustration, "Yeah. For now. For now. What happens when he doesn't need you? What happens when one of you gives away your location? Lissa and Abe spent two weeks researching that safe hotel, and you just up and left it!" He paused to run a hand through his hair, composing himself as he did so. "Who is so great that you would risk everything to meet them?" he asked, more out of anger than curiosity.
"That's not important right now," I said. Adrian narrowed his eyes, taking my dismissal as a challenge. "Like hell it isn't. This person is important enough that Rose is risking her own life to go get them. She's only done that for one other person before." He gave me a pointed look. I fought my instinct to swallow or look down in shame.
He shook his head and flounced down on the sofa. The anger bled out of him slowly, like watching a air mattress with a hole lose it's air. The anger was replaced by a hopelessness. "I can't stand knowing that she's not safe," he said quietly.
The image before me was disturbing to say the least. Adrian sitting on the same sofa I would drink from Rose on. Adrian looking destitute and broken in the same room I tortured his girlfriend. He had no idea what I had done to her. Or did he? I couldn't blame her if she told him everything about her time with my Strigoi self.
Suddenly I wondered how far his feelings went for her. All this time I'd only been thinking of their relationship in terms of Rose's feelings, but I had to acknowledge how invested Adrian was in it. I wanted to know how devoted he was, but at the same time I didn't want to be that asshole who asks the question.
I chose instead to comfort him, because I knew what it was like to wonder if Rose was in danger. "Well she's safe for now, at least. We're camping out tonight. No one will find us at a campground." I didn't want to stand over him as I said this, so I sat in the armchair I used to read Western's in while Rose slept.
"Like I said… we're helping Rose look for someone. Once we find this person, she might be able to come back to Court," I explained slowly, wondering if I should be telling Adrian any of this. I chased that thought away; he already knew too much, there was no point in keeping him in the dark at this point.
Adrian looked up, dumbfounded, "But we haven't found who killed my aunt yet." I shrugged, "It's a crazy plan, but when Rose has a crazy plan it usually works out in the end." Adrian smirked, a softness overcoming his features, "Yeah, you got that right." I became slightly uncomfortable seeing Adrian's fondness of Rose, but at the same time, it put part of my mind at ease.
I leaned forward with my hands laced together between my knees to face Adrian more directly. "I won't let anything happen to her," I promised.
Adrian looked at me for a long while, a mix of emotions echoing through him that reflected my own: regret, grief, hope and devotion. "I know you won't," he practically whispered. His assurance and faith in me surprised me enough for me to raise an eyebrow in question. Adrian sighed and the cigarette between his fingers disappeared in a fog- a parlor trick for the spirit user in his own dream.
Adrian leaned forward this time, staring intently at me. "I know you'll take care of her. I saw it in your aura the day we helped Rose escape. I didn't expect anything less, I'd known how your aura lit up around her since I first saw you two together at the ski lodge…" There was no malice in his tone, no bitterness towards me, which only shocked me more. I stayed silent, he took that as a sign to keep talking.
"She's still in love with you." His blunt words made me flinch. It was a reality I didn't want to discuss with Rose's current lover. Adrian looked at me with a desperate glint in his eye, pleading me to speak.
He wanted me to assure him that Rose spent the last few days obsessing over Adrian and missing him, that she didn't even notice I was there.
I couldn't lie to him.
"I know," I replied, a lump was stuck in my throat.
Adrian took a deep breath and let out a slow sigh. I knew which question was coming next, yet nothing could have prepared me to answer it.
"Do you still love her?"
"I will protect her with my life," I said.
Adrian laughed without mirth, "And you would do the same for me, because that's the kind of guy you are. But what I want to know is if you're still in love with my girlfriend?"
I swallowed, but the lump was still lodged in my throat. I refused to answer that question to Adrian.
He huffed and left the couch to examine the room again. "I guess you don't have to answer that, I just wanted to hear you say the words that your aura has been screaming for weeks."
I turned a fraction in my seat to look at Adrian, but he was pretending to be engrossed by the gowns hanging in the wardrobe, his fingers pinched the lace of a blue silk dress. "And what does my aura tell you?" I asked.
Adrian let go of the silk dress in his hand and it fell back into place. The room was quiet enough to hear the swish as the dress rubbed against another article of clothing in the wardrobe. He smiled at me, a small smile that didn't reach his eyes.
"Goodnight, Dimitri."
The next thing I knew, the room and the man before me faded to blackness. I settled into a deeper sleep, all the while my stomach was turning. I couldn't shake the feeling that I was wrecking a perfectly good relationship, and I didn't know if I wanted to stop it either. Those thoughts haunted my restless sleep; which must not have lasted long, because I woke more tired than when I went to bed. I also didn't wake up by myself, which proved how sleep neglected I was.
My senses were on high alert before I opened my eyes; I could hear female voices speaking softly across the campsite- and small whimpers next to me. I rolled over and opened my eyes to see Ivan shaking in his sleep, painful noises erupting from his mouth. The faint glow in the tent indicated the sun had recently risen. I gripped Ivan's shoulder to shake him awake, but when my hand closed on him, his whole body tensed, "No," he begged, "Don't take me."
"Ivan," I murmured, nudging him awake, "It's just a nightmare." I realized that for the first time since I'd been transformed, I slept without any nightmares of my own. I would have to thank Adrian for that. I still felt a surge of empathy for Ivan; I could imagine exactly what he saw when he slept.
It took a few moments for Ivan to adjust to the world around him. When he had fully woken up he gave me a pathetic smile, "That's not going to attract the ladies, is it?" I couldn't help but laugh at the lame joke. As much as Ivan was suffering now, I knew that deep down he would always care about his public image. Not that he had any reason to worry, everyone adored Ivan when he was alive. There was plenty of grief to go around when he 'died'.
His 'death' didn't add up, either. It was another thing about Ivan that unnerved me. I attended his funeral, granted it was a closed casket, there had to be a body in the coffin. After all that I revealed to him, it didn't seem wrong to ask him about that time in his life. Until now I'd been too occupied by having him back in my life that I wasn't too concerned with how he left it.
"Ivan…" I began, not knowing how to put my concerns into words. I sat up, hunched over since the tent was too small for my height. "The alchemists found a body when you died. They claimed it was you. That's why we all thought you were long gone."
Ivan sat up too, looking uncomfortable at the shift in our conversation. He understood the question without me having to ask it. "Not a long story there, unlike all of yours," he nudged me playfully. "The Strigoi who turned me was named Vova. He had tried turning several people before, but they had all been staked or burnt by the sun not long after they'd been turned. He was extra careful with me, he wanted to make sure I survived. After he drained me and fed me his blood he went to a nightclub and found a Moroi that was blond and fair skinned. He completely mauled that man, no Alchemist would have been able to tell that the body didn't belong to me. We left the body with the fallen guardians. Vova thought it would increase my chance of survival if everyone thought I was dead." There was a faraway look in his eyes as he recalled the past. He held no warmth for his maker.
"What happened to Vova?" I asked. Ivan shrugged, "He's probably still out there. We, uh, parted ways." The bitterness in his voice made me think there was more to it than his simple explanation. I smiled, relating to Ivan's hatred of his maker.
"You told me that you hated your maker, too, right?" he asked.
I scoffed, running a hand down my face to rub away some of my grogginess. "Yeah," I mumbled. "He wanted me to be obedient and all that, but I didn't want him to have power over me." Ivan sat up, a crude smile on his face, "Strigoi are all the same, aren't they?"
I couldn't have agreed more.
We joined the others in the campsite. Everyone had bags under their eyes from a rough night's sleep. As soon as I was standing I stretched out my arms and yawned. My back was sore from sleeping on the ground.
None of us wanted to waste time with getting on the road to the Dragomir child, and I didn't want to travel with unnecessary luggage so, we left the tents and blankets in the camp for the rangers to collect.
"It's just like Russia," Rose mumbled when I told her not to pack up the tents. I raised an eyebrow, not understanding her. Surely this campsite was nothing like the hotel. "How so?" Ivan asked, coming up from behind me draping an arm over my shoulder in a brotherly fashion.
Sydney also gained interest in the statement and stepping in to join our circle. Rose shrugged nonchalantly. "Oh, it's just that we're leaving the tents and stuff here. When I was in Russia I went to a lot of high end bars and clubs." A smile crept over her face at the memory, "I bought a lot of uhhh-mazing dresses there, but I had to ditch them all whenever I moved around…" The smile faltered as she looked wistfully off into space, "I wish I still had some of those dresses. They really were gorgeous."
"I liked the one you were wearing the night we met," Syndey stated matter-of-factly, looking at me as she spoke. I gave her a questioning glance and she waved her arm, encouraging me to do something, her eyes imploring me. Ivan nudged me and nodded, giving me the same encouragement. Holy hell, I had two wingmen. Both of them jumped on the opportunity to give me a chance to woo Rose.
I wasn't sure if I regretted or relished that I'd told them the story of Rose and I last night.
I cleared my throat, suddenly self-conscious. Rose, of course, noticed the exchange between the three of us. She raised her eyebrows at us, I could practically see her deciphering the meaning behind our silent communication.
"I'm sure they were, uh, very pretty." I said awkwardly. The words themselves weren't that bad, it was the hesitancy with which I said it. Rose was taken aback, she opened her mouth to say something and closed it again. I mentally slapped myself for saying anything at all, let alone something stupid like that. Sydney gave me a disappointed look, as if I somehow let her down.
I noticed Rose blush slightly before excusing herself to the car. Sydney followed after her, but not before shaking her head at me in annoyance.
As soon as the girls were out of earshot Ivan turned on me.
"'Very pretty'?! That's all you've got?" Ivan stage whispered. I dropped my shoulders, feeling pathetic. "You know I'm no good at flirting!" I pinched the bridge of my nose. Shame and guilt coursed through me as I remembered my dream with Adrian. It was tearing him up to leave Rose alone with me, but he was trusting me. I couldn't just go and break that trust.
Ivan's eyes bugged out, still concerned with my lack of flirting skills, "You're telling me that you scored that," he pointed to where Rose was, "without flirting with her? That girl is a solid ten, and girls like her don't sleep with guys that say 'very pretty.'" I felt a surge of anger at him for making Rose sound like some prized possession. My blood was boiling under the skin.
I knew that Ivan didn't always have the upmost respect for women, but to talk about someone as honorable and courageous, and altruistic as Roza… that was just not acceptable. I stepped closer to Ivan, invading his personal space and looming over him. I had never threatened or tried to intimidate Ivan, but I was overstepping all kinds of boundaries lately. There was a spark in Ivan's eyes, as if he expected this, wanted it, even.
"Score?" I asked, my voice dangerously low. "I didn't score anything, Ivan. I fell in love. She was with me because I love her, not because I flirt with her."
Ivan straightened up, a huge smirk plastered on his face as if he'd won this battle. "There it is. Did you hear yourself? You said love, not loved. Present tense." His smug smile grew and he tilted his head to one side, "No more reservations, Dimka. After all you've done for me, the least I can do is help you get Rose back," he laughed, rubbing his jaw, "God knows you'll need it." He patted my shoulder before walking to the car, leaving my heart pounding and my conscious torn.
Needless to say, the road trip was quiet and uncomfortable after that.
This whole time I was imagining the Dragomir child to be more… regal. A figment of my imagination that already met the standards of royalty. I guess that wouldn't make sense if the child was raised in the dark about their lineage, but I still wasn't expecting a lanky tween girl with unkempt hair.
I recognized her from St. Vladimir's. I remembered that her and Rose knew each other, another surprise, and it was clear from this meeting that the girls were friendly with each other. Given any other circumstance, they would have hugged and squealed with delight to see each other.
Lissa's half-sibling, Jill Mastrano, had the same jade green eyes as every other renowned Dragomir. I didn't need any extra convincing that we'd found the right girl. There wasn't much of an age difference between Jill and the princess, I found it disturbing that Eric had cheated on Rhea when Lissa was a baby. I was half hoping the illegitimate child would have been conceived before Eric was married.
Jill's mother, Emily, reluctantly invited us in to explain ourselves. Once she determined Sonya was in fact a Moroi again, she was more willing to hear us out. I let the Moroi, Sydney and Rose take the open seats. There was a spot for me in an armchair, but I opted to stand near the doorway. I immersed myself in what Rose called "seeing-without-seeing." The small act of guardian duty helped put my mind at ease. Standing at a post and watching the room carefully fulfilled a sense of purpose that can't be achieved by chaperoning a group of vampires across the country in an Alchemist's SUV.
I noticed right away that Jill's father, or rather step-father, John, felt hostility toward us for bringing fugitives into his home. Not that I blamed him, but I would be keeping an extra careful eye on him.
Rose did all the talking. She jumped right into the hard parts by pointing to John and saying, "He's not your father." There was a lot of back and forth after that. Jill and Emily were becoming more and more upset by the topic, but it was John that I was worried about. Rose paid no attention to him, her eyes were only for the long lost Dragomir.
John was quiet for most of the conversation, although it was less of a conversation and more of a… well I don't know what to compare this to. John had his hands folded in his lap, and I could see them tense and loosen up multiple times. He also had a twitch in his jaw; the smallest of signs that he would not take this news with ease.
With Sonya's help, Emily finally admitted to an affair with Eric Dragomir.
When Rose demanded that Jill go back to court with us, John looked at me, as is sizing me up to determine if he could take me in a fight. As stupid as it was for a Moroi to consider taking on a guardian, especially one with my reputation, I had to admire the determined glint in his eye.
If she'd seen what I had, maybe we would have refused Emily's offer to stay the night. But without Rose to confirm my fears, I dismissed them as just an overactive imagination and my apprehension about this entire situation. I should have listened to my gut.
About an hour later, the Moroi were feeding downstairs so Rose and myself were in the spare bedroom. I had just calmed Rose down after she saw Eddie save Lissa from an attack through Lissa's eyes. She heaved a sigh of frustration, "I should be there with her."
We each had a chance to shower, and I caught myself admiring the way Rose's dress clung to her hips and chest, how I wanted to run my fingers through her damp hair flowing down her body.
"You will be soon," I promised. Now that we had Lissa's sibling, we could go back to Court and move on from the dark chapter in our lives. Rose smiled and shook her head in disbelief, "We did it… I can't believe we actually found Jill. Adrian's gonna have to stop calling her 'Jailbait' if she's going to be a Lady… or even Princess if Lissa becomes queen."
Rose spoke Adrian's name with a fondness in her voice that I hadn't heard in a long time. Back then, she spoke my name like that. The spirit dream I shared with Adrian popped into my head; the pain in his eyes from being apart from Rose. "Adrian…" I said, his name rolling off my lips like a penance for a crime I hadn't yet committed. "He seems pretty loyal to you."
"He is. I trust him completely." Rose smiled, a distant look in her eyes as she thought of him. Rose's answer and faith in Adrian felt like a bullet in my stomach. I don't know why I continued with the questions when it only felt like someone digging into the bullet wound.
"And he makes you happy?" My tone came out more clipped and forceful than I'd meant to. I resisted the urge to reach out and tuck her hair behind her ear to let her know I wasn't angry with her (since most of our conversations these days wound up becoming fights). Rose turned pensive, "Yeah. He does. I have fun with him. I mean he's infuriating sometimes- okay, a lot of the time- by don't be fooled by all the vices. He's not a bad person."
Rose just had to add the last part, sending a wave of guilt through me for lusting after a good person's girlfriend. "I know he isn't," I said. "He's a good man. It's not easy for everyone to see, but I can." I can see it better than ever now, after I witnessed first hand how Adrian was willing to risk his reputation and good-standing with the Court to rescue Rose. He had everything to lose, and still thought Rose was a bigger priority. "He's still getting himself together, but he's on his was. I saw it in the escape. And after…"
I stopped myself, unsure if I wanted to continue. But Rose was looking at me with those eyes as if she could see right through me. As if she already knew the question I was going to ask. Why the hell not? I asked myself, Go ahead and throw salt into the wound. 'After Siberia, he was there for you? He helped you?"
Rose bit her lip unconsciously and nodded. This was just getting worse and worse. While part of me was happy that Adrian turned out to be a stand-up guy for Rose, a bitterness dwelled in me that couldn't stand to see someone else making Rose happy.
I would never admit it to her, but I couldn't stand that Rose had become independent from me; that she no longer needed me in her life.
"Do you love him?" I asked. The words were out of my mouth before I could stop them. I regretted them instantly, believing that I didn't want to know her answer.
Rose's eyes reflected my own feelings in that moment, and I knew with certainty that no matter how she felt about Adrian, there was still a place for me in her heart. She was silent for a long time, keeping her eyes on me for what felt like years. I gravitated toward her without realizing what I was doing. The world around me blurred to the background, and I could see was the woman in front of me- she became everything in that moment.
"Yeah," she said softly, "I… I do love him."
And just like that, the moment was gone. I looked to the window as if I could see it flying away. "Good. I'm glad," I lied. My mind went blank as I focused on a potted plant hanging from the neighbor's window sill. I felt Roza's presence in the room with me, but I couldn't form any rational thought in my head.
The figure in my peripheral stepped closer. "What's wrong?" she asked. I wanted to say, "That depends, Rose. What's wrong with me? Plenty. What's wrong with this? Everything." But instead I lied again. "Nothing. I just want to make sure that you're okay. That you're happy," well, at least the last part was true. I turned to face her, a smile plastered on my face. I thought it was strange that I had spent most of my life training to hide smiles and keep my face blank, and not I was working to do the exact opposite. I probably wasn't fooling anyone with my visage, especially not Roza.
There was a crease between her eyebrows as she tried to figure my truth out. Something in the way she studied me implored me to open up to her. "Things have been changing, that's all." I said, trying to reassure her. "It's making me reconsider so much. Ever since Donovan… and then Ivan and Sonya… it's strange. I thought it all changed the night Lissa saved me. But it didn't. There's been so much more, more to the healing than I'd realized. Every day I figure out something new. Some new emotion I'd forgotten to feel. Some revelation I totally missed." My eyes travelled to her hair, "Some beauty I didn't see."
Rose touched the lock of hair I was focused on, "Hey, my hair in the alley does not go on that list, okay? You were in shock." Usually Rose's playful attitude would snap me out of my reverie, but not this time. I smiled fondly at her, "No, Roza. It was beautiful. It's beautiful now." Once again, I was back in the moment with her. My subconscious guilt and moral compass were suppressed by the wave of emotions I felt when in the room alone with Roza.
"The dress is just throwing you off," she attempted to joke, but her gaze was more sensual than mocking. I knew that it would come back to bite me later, but at that point I didn't care about Rose and Adrian's relationship. I was operating solely on reflex now, and every instinct in me wanted to have Roza, no matter the price I pay later.
After everything we had been through at the academy, and how hard we fought to be together, looking at her then, I thought that I should have fought harder.
The concerned look returned to Rose's face. "What?" she asked. "Why are you looking at me like that?"
I shook my head at her; only Rose would be ridiculous enough to be self-conscious. Doesn't she know how perfect she is? If Adrian wasn't going to let her know, I would.
"Because sometimes," I said with a smile, "a person can get so caught up in the details that they miss the whole. It's not just the dress or the hair. It's you. You're beautiful." Saying the words aloud felt like a breath of fresh air. A weight had been lifted off my chest. "So beautiful, it hurts me," I added, remembering the first time I admitted she was beautiful.
It had taken a lust charm for me to tell her she was beautiful and touch her the first time, and I had a similar feeling of being compelled now… but this was no magic spell. This was just my pure, unquestionable love for the goddess standing before me. We were standing mere inches apart now, unintentionally drifting closer and closer like magnets.
"Hey, guys, have you- oh." Sydney stopped in the doorway to examine what she'd just walked in on. There's no telling how far I would have taken it then and there if we hadn't been interrupted by Sydney. Rose took two steps away from me, a sheepish look on her face, "What's up?"
My mind was still swimming, but it was easier to think clearly with another person in the room. Really, I was glad for Sydney's interference. Without heady thought impairing my judgement, I scolded myself for letting things get so far with Rose.
Sydney's brief conversation with Rose halted when we heard a commotion downstairs. I jumped to attention, both Rose and I instinctively ran to the stairs, where I could hear shouts. "Where is Rosemarie Hathaway and Dimitri Belikov?" Hard, steel voices demanded. I turned to Rose, who had frozen in place, grabbing her arm and pulling back down the hallway. "Guardians," I hissed, "guardians are raiding the house."
I shouldn't have underestimated John.
Rose reached for Sydney, gripping her wrist but not saying anything. Rose bit her lip in fear. Sydney nodded, understanding what Rose wasn't saying. "Go now," Sydney implored. "I'll hold them off as long as I can."
I yanked on Rose harder, desperate to get her away from this house. Sydney might get into some trouble when caught, but for us, it was life and death. I led her down to the room at the end of the hall and flung the door open. Thankfully there was a window big enough for us to get through. I opened the window pane, and just before jumping, I paused. Ivan was downstairs. I looked back to the open doorway, then at Rose.
"What are you doing?" Rose panicked, "We need to get out of here!"
I nodded. Rose was my priority. I told myself that Ivan would be okay. I swung my legs over the window sill and propelled myself to the ground two stories beneath me. Rose fell ungracefully next to me, rolling on her ankle.
She would have to push through the pain if we were going to survive this. I helped her stand, putting her arm around my shoulder so that I could support her weight as we started sprinting away from the house, the shouts of guardians communicating followed closely behind.
I pressed my index and middle finger lightly on the golf ball size swell on Rose's ankle. "Does that hurt?" I asked. Rose was sitting on a wooden bench-table while I knelt by her. She grimaced looking at her ankle, "Yeah, a bit." I nodded and rolled her ankle with one hand while the other kept her leg still. She didn't cry out in pain, so I took that as a good sign. "I don't think it's broken," I said, grabbing the hem of her dress to cover her leg. My hand felt warm even after breaking contact with her.
Rose reached for the bag of peas and crawled into the tent. Tent, singular. Rose's dress was a wreck so I went into the supermarket alone to buy all new camping gear, including frozen peas for Rose's ankle. No matter how much I told myself I bought just one tent for safety reasons (we needed to stay side-by-side until we knew we hadn't been followed), there was a thrill to sharing the small space with Rose.
It would be torture for sure. My hand formed into a fist, I squeezed to release the tension. All this proximity to her, and Ivan's role in getting me to open up more has been making it harder and harder to keep my distance, literally and figuratively. I couldn't even say I wanted the distance anymore.
I crawled into the tent and sat opposite Rose, who had that dazed look in her eyes that told me she was in Lissa's head. Her entire face was slack, with her mouth forming a small o shape. Then her eyes moved to me, she must have sensed me or heard me, I'm not sure how her senses function when she visited Lissa. Her eyes flashed in comprehension for me but she didn't say anything, choosing to concentrate on the other plane in her mind.
I opened a bag of chips and ate some, patiently waiting for Rose to come back to me on her own terms. Given the raid that just happened, there must be a lot going on at Court for Rose to see.
After at least ten minutes Rose sighed, she closed her mouth and took notice of her surroundings. "The guardians have Sydney, Ivan, and the Mastranos. The brothers and Sonya escaped. Hans interrogated Lissa, he told her that two unidentified men tried to take off with Jill but Ivan fought them off. The brothers must have been using a glamour, nobody knows we were working with them. Hans is about to interrogate Jill and her parents. I wish Lissa could be in the room when that happens."
Rose reached for the bag of chips, absent mindedly munching as she pondered Lissa meeting her half-sibling. "What do you think Hans will do with Ivan?" I asked, handing the chips to Rose to keep myself from eating more. I didn't even like sour cream and onion flavor, I just bought them from Rose.
She shrugged, "Put him in jail until they can prove he's not Strigoi like they did for you? He'll be safe," she said dismissively. "I just hope Emily doesn't talk Jill out of telling the truth," she mumbled. "With Jill there, Lissa will be elected queen, I'm sure of it. You should see the crowds that gather for her, Dimitri. People love her." There was awe in Rose's voice as she spoke, mixing in with her hope for the future.
"Jill will do the right thing," I said, though I wasn't completely sure that was true. I pictured Ivan being thrown in a cell similar to mine. He shouldn't be treated that way, thrown in a cage because simple minded people couldn't accept his, our, transformation. "We don't need to worry about that right now. And the brothers are gone. We just need to lie low until it's safe to go back to Court and get Ivan out of containment. They can't lock him up like that." Containment is what Hans called it while I was being followed by my own security detail and subjected to daily tests to prove that I was a living being and not undead. "He deserves better than that."
Rose hummed, studying me as if I'd just said something profound. I raised an eyebrow, taking satisfaction in the brief pursing of her lips as I did so. It was mean, but I raised a single eyebrow at her more than I did to other people because I know it makes her envious of me. "What is it?"
A large smile grew on her lips, similar to the looks she would give me at the academy when I was pissing her off and she became too sweet. "It's funny," she said bitterly, not one trace of humor in her voice.
"You've been treating Ivan like I treated you, but I guess it's okay now, right? It's not like you two were in love or anything. It's not like you traveled all the way to Russia to save him." Her voice felt like ice wrapping around my veins and freezing my blood. Usually when she was mad at me I was quick to react with my own anger, but she left me speechless then. She laid on her side, facing away from me and pulled a fleece blanket up to cover her shoulders. "You don't mind taking first watch, do you? I'm going to get some rest."
A lot of back and forth between Rose and Dimitri! Just like the good ol' days ;) I couldn't resist adding in a bit more Rose with her attitude, because it's not a VA fanfic without Rose being Rose.
How have you all been? For my friends in the USA, how are you feeling after the election? I just started taking an American Politics course, and my professor seems really funny and interesting! I'm sure we'll have a lot to discuss this semester. I love getting PMs and Reviews from all of you, so don't hesitate to reach out to me!
Let me know what you think of this chapter! -thefangirldiaries
