Breakdowns and Run-Ins
"I just don't get it. Why are they even near us?"
"I bet it has something to do with that stupid Golden Boy. He always is caught up with trouble."
"Who was crying? Oh, no I was not crying. I don't cry."
"Did anyone else feel that cold? It was so deep to the bones. What is going on?"
Draco could barely make out who was asking questions. His mind was still uneasy about their recent encounter. The skies were a golden red when just a few minutes ago they were a dark and misty haze. He knew they would reach Hogwarts soon but he did not know how he was going to tell his mother about the attack. He could already hear his father ranting about Dumbledore and his lack of leadership. People around him continued to talk but his mind was not ready to talk yet. He had never felt so hopeless in his life.
"Guys, I just need a breather. I need a walk by myself. I'll be back soon." He slid his way between two Slytherins standing at the compartment door but it seemed like no one was paying attention. Everyone was so caught up in their own thoughts that he realized no one was watching him. As this thought sunk in he tucked his hands into his pockets, ducked his head down low, and walked quickly away from the group. Crabbe tried to follow but he told him to stay with everyone else. "We don't know if they are coming back and I can handle myself. Stay with everyone else, alright?" He knew that was a lie. He barely survived this attack without breaking down, he would never be lucky enough to stay strong if the dementor came back.
Draco travelled down three cars before he reached a breaking point. The memories were beginning to weigh on his mind but he knew he had to keep it together. He finally reached the bathroom when he shoved the door open then slammed it shut. He leaned against the solid door and allowed his body to slump to the ground. He slipped his fingers through his pale hair hoping to feel his mother's touch on his head. His eyes began to water and his lip started to quiver. He could feel his body breaking down and shaking uncontrollably. Keep it together, you made it through, he told himself and he slowly rose from the floor. His legs felt numb as he supported most of his body with his arms. He struggled to reach the sink as he gripped the marble and stared at himself in the mirror. He was focusing on controlling his breathing when he noticed another person in the bathroom. It was too late to fix himself, the damage was done. Ron came around the corner and his eyes were wider than saucers.
"Are you truly crying?" Ron was in shock to see such raw emotions from Draco. Malfoys don't show emotions, especially deep ones. It was too late for Draco to try and cover up what happened. "Look, we all suffer in our own ways. Just let it go and don't say a word to anyone. That's the last thing I need right now." Ron suddenly puffed up his chest, "Suffer? You want to know what suffering is? Dealing with you for the past two years is suffering. The way you've treated me and my friends is suffering. You know nothing about what you have done to humiliate my family and friends. You didn't just fight off a dementor, we did. So stay away from us this year and we'll call it even. Deal?" Ron was still trying to act tough. Draco chuckled inside, this is exactly what I needed to relax. Draco fixed his hair in the mirror and slapped his cheeks to gain some color back into them. "You didn't fight off a dementor. The old man in your compartment did. All you did was cover your face. I saw what happened so don't try to label yourself as a hero." He took a step towards Ron, "I don't make deals with people like you." He adjusted his black shirt and walked towards the door. With his right hand pushing it open he turned to grin at Ron. "It's so cute when you try to act tough but you'll always just be a nobody. Thanks for cheering me up, mate." The door swung open again and he turned right. He took a few steps down the corridor and leaned against the wall. He was waiting for Ron to leave to see where he went. But before the door opened again he felt a gentle touch on his right shoulder. He snapped his head around and was surprised to see her standing there.
Draco quickly grabbed her arm and pulled her into one of the darkened doorways. "What are you doing? Are you trying to cause panic in this car?" He didn't know how to handle his emotions right now. She began to get a panicked look on her face when he realized he was gripping her shoulders too tight. "'Mione, sorry. I didn't mean to grab you. This train ride has just been very...strange." Hermione gently rubbed the emerald on the necklace while avoiding his gaze. "I know, I just-I want to say thank you for checking on me. I've got a lot on my mind for the school year and I don't know how I'm going to do it all. And the boys only seem interested in what's going on in Harry's life. They haven't even asked me if I'm doing alright or how my summer was or noticed anything about me. It's just...thank you, I guess. I don't know." Hermione began to walk away when Draco gently pulled her back. "I like your hair?" Now he felt stupid. Really? You like her hair? That's what you go with? She looked down as she grabbed part of her hair and tucked it behind her ear. She locked eyes on the carpet and started to walk away. Draco sighed deeply and leaned on the wall again as she walked away. As she transferred between cars reality set in. Draco quickly screened the car to see if anyone saw them talking. He then felt the rock in his pocket get heavy. He slipped back into the darkened doorway and pulled it out to see it glowing. People walked by but no one seemed to notice.
Did he really just say he likes my hair? Well at least someone noticed. He said the necklace is simple and beautiful...was he calling me simple minded!? Oh buddy, if that's the case I will need to remind him why I got highest marks in charms. A good hex might help jog his memory. It's weird for him to say beautiful though. Oh shoot! I need to find my choc-
All the sudden the voices stopped. He could hear her as if she was standing there but it was clearly in his head. He did not know how he felt about his mother's gift but he knew what her intentions were. He shook a smile to his face, dropped the rock back into his pocket, and began walking back to the Slytherin group. When he returned they all seemed to be recovering better and Draco could see the relief in Crabbe and Goyle for his return. He slipped back into the compartment and kicked his feet up on to a seat. "Boys, we are going to have a great year. Guess who I saw having a nervous breakdown in the bathroom!?"
