Chapter Forty-four
"No, no, I…I changed my mind." Jake whimpered. "I can't do this!"
"Jake…" Peter started gently.
"No!" Jake shouted like a child not getting his way. "Take another step closer and I will kill you!"
"Jake, we're just trying to help." Neal assured.
"I don't care, get out of my way!"
Neal looked to Peter to see what their next move should be, he had no doubt that if further provoked that Jake would turn violent but at the same time just letting him go could be a death sentence for them all. If Jake died it would only make sense for Sawyer to take his place. Standing in the doorway into the large bathroom Peter was weighing his options and not looking like he was thrilled with any of them. Jake had peacefully followed Neal into the back room for medial attention but the moment he realized that he was trapped he had panicked. Staring Peter and Neal down Jake didn't look like he was interested in their help despite desperately needing it. When Jake narrowed his eyes and squared his shoulders in preparation to attack Peter Neal stepped in between them to defend Peter, which further blocked the door from Jake's view.
"Neal, no, let him go." Peter put his hand on Neal's shoulder before turning to Jake. "Jake, we're not going to force you into anything, but if you leave now you're just going to get worse."
Neal followed Peter's lead as he moved to the side to allow Jake to pass by if he wanted to. With a feral look in his eyes Jake's gaze shifted rapidly from the doorway to the two men as he struggled to make a decision. With sweat dripping off his fever heated skin Jake was locked in place; too desperate to leave, too afraid to accept help. Shaking heavily Jake reached up and hovered his hand protectively over the burn mark that was slowly killing him and shook his head slightly in stubborn refusal.
"Jake," Neal said softly "you've survived on your own for so long down here, don't give in when you're this close to not having to fight alone."
Jake stared at Neal as tears slipped down his face silently. Neal could see how much Jake wanted to trust in them, but could understand that after so long on his own that it might be hard to accept anything that even resembled hope. Hanging his head in exhausted defeat rather than in relief Jake sighed in misery before he sat down on the concrete floor. For as much as Jake had tormented him Neal still hated to see him looking so broken. Not really trusting that Jake was safe to approach Neal looked to Peter again for direction. Having the same uncertainly Peter hesitated, he clearly wanted to step forward first but he also knew that he was more likely to set Jake off than Neal was.
Neal could practically hear Peter's internal dilemma on the matter and solved it by cautiously walking up to Jake. Peter stayed back but kept on the balls of his feet in case he had to move in quickly to intervene. Neal found himself with a painful knot in his stomach as he knelt down in front of Jake. His instincts were screaming at him to keep his distance from the dangerous man that had mercilessly tortured him on several occasions and even admitted to enjoying it. Swallowing his fear Neal held out his hand, inviting Jake to take it as a sign of peace. Between his residual fear of Jake and coming down off the adrenaline of his last fight Neal couldn't keep his hand from trembling. Jake noted Neal's trepidation sadly before he glanced up at Peter who was still poised to defend Neal if he had to. Neal got the feeling that Jake didn't trust what was happening mostly because he didn't feel like he deserved it.
"Jake..."
"When you two first arrived down here I could see how bonded you were. I envy it even though I never thought it would last down here." Jake interrupted in a voice soaked in guilt "I saw instantly that what you had was beautiful and I wanted to destroy it. I had to prove to myself that it's every man for himself. I wasn't going to be satisfied until I turn you on each other."
"I think we all know now that that's never going to happen."
"It really isn't is it?"
"No." Neal smiled warmly "and since you can't beat us…"
Neal left the rest of the saying off as he encouraged Jake to join them by taking his hand. Although he still looked like he didn't believe in Neal's altruism Jake reached out and took Neal's hand. Neal wasn't sure what more he or Peter could do to prove to Jake that they wanted to save him but he felt like they at least had a start. Peter gave the delicate alliance a moment to solidify before he joined the pair and knelt down on the floor as well to bring himself eye level with Jake. Jake eyed Peter apprehensively at first but he eventually resigned himself to what had to be done.
"I'm sorry, Jake." Peter said genuinely. "I don't want to hurt you, but we have to get that shirt off."
"You can lean against me." Neal offered. "You can focus on me while Peter tears the shirt open, it will be quick."
"That's a good plan." Peter agreed. "It will be faster than trying to get it off over your head. Okay?"
Jake closed his eyes and nodded. Working quickly to keep Jake from losing his nerve or outright turning on them again Neal moved to sit down behind him and guided him to lay back. Jake whimpered in a combination of pain and fear as he laid down in Neal's lap. Offering him the support that he'd promised Neal put his hands in Jake's, but Peter shook his head at the move. Peter reached out and removed Neal's hands from Jake's grip and had Jake put his palms flat against the floor. Neal gave Peter a confused look that Jake picked up on.
"Peter's worried I might break your hands in a violent haze of pain." Jake explained having figured out Peter's motivation. "He's right. We can't have you ending up like Slattery, he'll probably live but you'd be a dead man with that injury."
Neal cringed with a pang of guilt radiating out from his chest at the mention of Slattery. Worrying about Jake had help distract him from the violent fight but it all came back to him at the mention of Slattery's name. He could still hear the sickening sound of Slattery's bone cracking against his jaw. Neal was suddenly haunted by the feel of the broken pieces of Slattery's hand shifting in his grip when he'd attacked him again. He hadn't even hesitated to go for Slattery's weakness when he'd thought Peter was in trouble. Neal was horrified by what he had done, but what was worse was the fact that he couldn't find it in himself to regret it. Even though he had misread the situation he had been instantly willing to inflict pain on someone else to save Peter, and he knew that if the situation arose again he would do it again in a heartbeat. Neal doubted he would have been that quick to respond to the same scenario with such cruelty a month ago. It terrified him that with Slattery he hadn't even tried to think of another solution. Jake had told him that violence was going to become part of his nature and now it was.
"Neal." Peter said to pull Neal's focus back to the present.
Neal looked up at Peter to let him know he was paying attention again. He knew he still had to work on coming to terms with the monster that growing inside of him, but that would have to wait. Peter gave him a concerned look but quickly hid it to keep Jake from picking up on the tension. Jake was shivering in Neal's lap as his anxiety mounted. Neal tried to help by putting his hands over Jake's; being careful to keep Jake from being able to accidentally grab a hold of them. Jake pressed his back into Neal in terror when Peter reached out and took a hold of the collar of his shirt in his hands. Peter was about to tear open the shirt but hesitated when he saw that Jake was staring down at his own chest. There was a real danger that looking at the fresh brand mark would be more than Jake's fractured psyche could take right now. Peter flicked his eyes up to Neal for help and Neal nodded his understanding.
"Jake?" Neal asked to get his attention.
When Jake automatically tilted his head back to look up at Neal Peter took advantage of the moment of distraction and ripped open Jake's shirt with a single powerful motion. Arching back Jake screamed in agony as the cotton tore away from the devastating burn in his chest. Neal was grateful that Peter had thought to take his hands out of Jake's as Jake clawed at the floor spasmodically. Looking down at the man writhing in his lap bile jumped to the back of Neal's throat as Jake's reopened wound erupted in a gruesome pool of fresh blood and dying flesh.
York had seared the brand far deeper than on either of them in an effort to make sure that Jake never forgot his place again. Jake cried out again, his voice cracking when he broke down into a bitter sobbing as his physical pain was compounded by the psychological strain. Desperate to help Neal brushed his hand against Jake's temple in a vain attempt to calm him. Still in the clutches of an overwhelming wave of pain Jake cried himself breathless. On the edge of permanent insanity Jake looked up pleadingly at Neal but there was nothing he could think to do to ease the pain he was in. Feeling helpless Neal stared down at Jake with sorrowful empathy only to be surprised when Jake suddenly lost the fear in his eyes. A bright smile lit up Jake's face for a split second before he relaxed and mercifully passed out. Dazed from the events Neal stared up at Peter for answers.
"W…why did he smile at me? I didn't do anything."
"You were there for him, that's far from nothing."
