Razzmatazz

Author's Note: Set during episode 26 of the original 2011 anime series. Enjoy the story and R&R.

Disclaimer: I do not own anything related to or of the Cardfight! Vanguard franchise.

Pairings: Established Reiji x Eiji. Referenced one-sided (canon) Kamui x Emi.

Summary:

Uno Reiji and Saga Eiji argue their way to the VF nationals.


Uno Reiji braced a wall for support, the straps of two overstuffed shoulder bags tucked under his collar and meeting across his open shirt, falling just above his shaking knees.

"It's not even 8 a.m., and it feels like my body's melting!"

Taking the train to nationals was brutal in and of itself. He really didn't need the heat revving his first unparented ride into high gear.

"BM, yo!"

…or an abbreviating echo copying him wherever he went.

That flagrant disregard for proper syntax could only belong to Saga Eiji. The shit-eating grin and topknot exacerbated Reiji's mood. Eiji packed much lighter than he did: a simple red knapsack. Though, to be fair, it looked as heavy.

"Ugh, would you stop using those insufferable initials? You're making it hotter!"

"EM? Excuse me, yo!"

"I just told you to stop!"

"I refuse! This is my policy! MP, yo!"

Even Eiji's name was a truncated spin on his own!

"It's noisy!" Reiji was honestly sweat-logged enough to push him onto the tracks. To do that, he'd have to route his worse half inside.

Eiji stole Reiji's glasses. Oh yes, ousting the boy's vision would drive the know-it-all nuts!

"Hey! Quit fighting, awright?"

"Shut up!"

Dumbly, they'd directed their spur-of-the-moment vitriol toward their boss, Katsuragi Kamui. The damn brat's hair and eyebrows were spiky and hostile.

"K-Kamui-san!"

"Play nice! It's too early to be fighting over such stupid things! Eiji, you see Reiji's carrying double the luggage! Give him a hand!"

"He overpacked! HO, yo!"

But once Kamui shot him a glare, the vested brunette repented.

"And Reiji, criticizing how Eiji talks? You can't teach a new dog old tricks!"

"You mean, 'You can't teach an old dog new tricks'?" the ponytailed nerd put dryly. "Won't keep me from trying!"

Recapturing and returning Reiji's glasses, Kamui scolded, "Well, cut it out! Would hate for my fans to be distracted at the tournament because they're bickering like an old married waffle!"

With that level of perceptiveness, Kamui should've had superior luck courting Emi. Yet nope, his wisdom ended at the knuckleheads on his crew. Further, his diction sucked.

"The phrase is 'an old married couple,' Kamui-san."

"Yeah, I said 'married couple,' didn't I?"

Between Card Capital's good-for-nothing manager, Aichi-oniisan, Misaki-san, that jerk Kai, and Kamui himself, fitting five people into one VW clunker was a tight squeeze.

Therefore, Reiji and Eiji proceeded by train. After getting the animus out of their systems, they recognized how thirsty they were.

"You have orange juice! YOJ, yo!"

"And you've got seltzer!"

Go figure. They brought each other's beverage of choice.

"Wanna switch? WS, yo?"

The again inseparable duo exchanged drinks, and glugged them down.

So refreshing! What were they arguing about?

"Hehe, ILY, yo!"

Reiji choked on his seltzer. No translation required.

When your relationship is this close to retiring to the drop zone, it never hurts to move to the rear-guard circles behind a vanguard who'll pull a heal trigger.

As expected of Kamui the Great!