Edna was not amused.
The train they were on was being hijacked by idiots, and the other passengers were too spineless to do anything about it.
"Alright, what brainless morons decided that this was the perfect time to perform a damn hijacking?" snapped Edna.
This was after she had turned the terrorist's gun into a trumpet, mind you.
"Only you, Ed, would take offense to the fact that a mere hijacking is interrupting your nap time."
"Hell yes I'm offended! Do you have any idea what a pain in the ass it is to deal with Winry's power-shopping?! I'm still tired and my arms are killing me!" snapped Edna.
Alphonse snickered.
Edna wasn't complaining that much considering Winry at least got her some new outfits that were to her tastes. Including a few skirts and ribbons.
His sister hated it whenever people looked down on her for her gender, but that didn't mean she went so far as act completely like a boy.
Edna looked awake and ready to beat the living hell out of someone for interrupting her desperately needed nap.
"Ed, what are we going to do?"
"...I'll take the high road and you take the low road?" said Edna.
"Sometimes I really wonder how I'm related to you," said Alphonse tiredly, before nodding.
"Look at the bright side...all these morons have are cheap guns and not a lot of skill at using them!" chirped Edna.
Alphonse stuck his tongue out at her, before transmuting the door that lead to the back end of the train into a make-shift shield just in case.
If the terrorists wanted to play around with guns, then he would be more than happy to 'educate' them on the dangers of ricochet. That plus he added a few discreet charms to protect himself from that issue.
An hour later...
"Attention moronic terrorists!" said Edna with far too much cheer. "This is your one and only warning...surrender now or face the rather painful consequences of waking me up just to promote your rather idiotic attempts to overthrow people who have actual training!"
(At the other end of the carriage Alphonse face-palmed. Why did his sister have to show off her massive ego.)
"Screw you!" said the lead terrorist.
"Suit yourself!" said Edna with dark cheer...before she opened up the water pipe and sent most of the terrorists into the waiting 'hands' of Alphonse.
"Welcome," said Al, punching his right hand into his left...before knocking them out and using the guard rails to pin the terrorists in place until they arrived at the station.
Once that was done, he went in and found Edna playing with the leader of his mess. Between the two of them, it didn't take much to have him all tied up.
Then Edna noticed that the man in the car was bleeding.
"...Al, can you go and get my medical tape and some gauze? I doubt he'll get an infection but I don't want to risk it. Besides, it's upsetting his kids," said Edna.
"Sure thing," said Alphonse. It only took him a few minutes, before Edna carefully treated the man's ear.
"Thanks. Who are you two?"
"We're the Elrics. I'm Ed and this is my younger brother Alphonse. We're heading to the Eastern Command to try our luck at being State Alchemists."
"Aren't you two a little young?" asked the man's wife.
"Too young for basic, but no one has ever said anything about an age limit to the alchemy exam. Besides, we're planning to become Investigative Alchemists, which means we shouldn't be sent directly to the front lines," said Edna.
At the station...
"Congratulations you two. Because of your efforts to stop the terrorists, you're being given special permission to take the exam," said Mustang smugly.
Edna's face twitched rampantly.
"Are you telling me there actually is an age limit to the exam?" she said growling.
Mustang blinked.
"There's no age limit as far as I'm aware, but considering that State Alchemists often go into basic training there is an age limit to joining the military officially."
Specifically the fact that the military already had a bad rep and didn't want the idea that they wanted child soldiers fighting for them...it was bad enough State Alchemists got such a bad reputation for the mess in Ishbal. As such the unofficial allowed limit without parental consent and a military sponsor for the alchemy exam was sixteen at the most, which happened to be the "age of consent" in Amestris.
Ed and Al were going to have to work their asses off and get a really high score to earn their license on the first try.
"Is there any other surprises you want to spring on us?" said Edna irritably.
Mustang smirked at her. Edna had the sudden desire to punch his face in.
"So you are the two kids who want to be investigative alchemists, huh?"
Edna looked at Mustang.
"Ed, Al, this is Maes Hughes. He leads the Investigative division...if you two are planning to act as Investigative Alchemists, then he'll be your main point of contact and the one training you so you can make actual arrests," explained Mustang.
"What do you mean training?" asked Alphonse.
"It's like this... you two are planning to look into things like illegal research and fake miracles being created by alchemy, right?" said Hughes. They nodded. "That means you'll need to be trained in how to handle evidence and a crime scene, so that when you bust the bad guys it'll actually stick in court and they can face justice."
Alphonse nodded brightly.
"We won't have to actually undergo basic training, right?"
"There are civilians in our department, but you'll still be considered under military jurisdiction because you want to be State Alchemists," said Hughes. "At most we'll want to be sure you can handle yourself against bigger opponents and can chase down the ones that try to run without actually killing anyone. Just to warn you though, you'll likely be called into court in order to explain things to non-alchemists."
"Got any other questions?" asked Mustang.
"Not at the moment," said Alphonse.
"I do. Are we going to be stuck with a lab space once we get our license?" asked Edna.
"Considering Investigative alchemists travel a lot, that's highly unlikely. You might be called in to inspect any labs where you're stationed however, and you'll still be required to do a yearly assessment. I'm not too sure what that would require, since most people aren't aware that it's an option," said Mustang.
As it turned out, the written exam was stupidly easy, in the opinion of the siblings. The psychological one was irritating, but they managed to pass.
It was the practical that they were tripping up on, because neither of them had written a working thesis regarding alchemy in their life.
Mustang had confirmed that the showing people made often lead to their official codename as a State Alchemist. Which was the issue...neither of them had any real specialty and had no idea what to present in order to get their license.
And the practical was in two days.
"Argh! At this rate we're going to have to wing it, because I have no idea what we're supposed to do!" said Edna unhappily.
"Why not use alkahestry? That was why we went to Xing, right?" said Alphonse.
Edna sighed in frustration.
"I can't think straight at all."
"It has been a rather nerve-wracking week," agreed Alphonse.
"What do you say to a mock-fight to clear our heads?"
Alphonse blinked, before nodded. Perhaps having a play fight like they always did would help give them a better idea of how to impress the people judging the practicals. Besides, it had been over a week since they had a chance to spar.
Edna grinned and made a set of 'roller blades' as Angel had called them. Alphonse took one look at the wheels and groaned.
Edna had an unholy love for the things, whereas he could never stand up straight on them without falling on his ass.
"Same rules as always?" asked Edna. In her hands was the naginata their teacher in Xing had given her, after noticing her preferece to using spears.
Alphonse nodded, having already drawn his dao sword.
No words passed between them. At the unnoticed signal, Edna charged towards Alphonse, using the butt of her naginata to send her into the air. Alphonse, being no fool, quickly countered using a quick transmutation of the ground to give him a height advantage which crumbled the moment his foot left the earth.
The two of them sparred like a well-oiled team, neither gaining any real advantage of the other. Where Edna was swift and had a longer reach due to her weapon, Alphonse was strong and steady like the trees themselves, often using quick and dirty transmutations through the gloves on his hands to create walls and the odd bits of earth armor.
The siblings were so caught up in their sparring match they didn't even notice the audience until they registered the clapping for a quick breather.
"That is quite impressive," said their audience.
It was a man in military uniform with an eyepatch over one eye. He seemed vaguely familiar and it was Alphonse who recognized him first.
"Ed, that's the man who was at the psychological assessment!" hissed Alphonse.
"Wait...you mean Mustang's boss?" said Edna, eyes wide.
"I couldn't help but notice the rather impressive display you two were putting on. I'm rather eager to see what you two will pull off for the practical tomorrow," said Bradley in a rather friendly manner.
Angel, however spoke up.
"Edna, don't show off any of your extra skills. His tone and body language might claim he's harmless but his eyes say something far more sinister," she warned.
Edna silently acknowledged her warning. He could play off the 'friendly boss' all he wanted, but there was something about him that made her Qi-sensing ability ring all sorts of alarm bells. It was bad enough they kept sensing something weird in the ground, like there was a crowd of people beneath them even though they were completely alone.
"Nothing better than a little exercise to clear your head. Besides, we couldn't think of anything specific we wanted to do with for the practicals anyway," said Edna with false cheer.
"Oh I don't know, I daresay this little demonstration would be more than enough," said Bradley.
Okay, if Angel hadn't tipped her off that something was weird about the man, that fake as hell smile would have. It didn't even remotely reach his eyes and it freaked her out.
Still he had given them an idea of what they could do for their practical. And it wasn't like they had any better ideas.
Edna hoped they wouldn't be sent out to the front lines because they were more "combat oriented" than "researchers".
Mustang pulled out the two files for the Elric siblings.
He couldn't believe both of them had passed, particularly after the demonstration they did. He had to wonder who put it into their heads to go against each other using their alchemy like that in front of the generals supervising the entire thing.
He would be the first to admit it had been damn impressive, and it meant they could skip the majority of the training Hughes was going to put them through since they were clearly capable of putting grown men down without killing them in the process. They just needed to learn a few new tricks and they would be good to go.
He did have to wonder what Führer Bradley was smoking when he came up with their codenames though. Seriously, who would give a pair of kids names like "Fullmetal" and "Knight" Alchemists?
A short time later...
"Fullmetal?" repeated Edna incredulously. While it did sound badass, she had been trying to show off her grace and agility, not the fact she had an automail leg.
Alphonse was pretty happy with being called the "Knight" alchemist, even if he would inevitably have to deal mistaking the actual name for "Night" since the "K" was silent.
"What made you two decide that a sparring match was the best idea for the practical?" asked Mustang, because he had to know.
Alphonse looked sheepish.
"Führer Bradley spotted us when we were mock-fighting the night before, and we couldn't think of anything better," he admitted.
Mustang looked like he had a headache.
"Well you two are officially certified Alchemists."
Edna high-fived her brother.
"So where are we stationed anyway?" asked Edna.
"It's fortunate in a way that you two are so young. Considering the display you put on, you would have been separated otherwise," said Mustang bluntly.
Wait, what?!
Edna's thought patterns must have shown on her face, because Mustang smirked at her.
"Did you really think the military would leave a pair of combat-oriented alchemists as smart as you two together unless there was mitigating circumstances? You're going to be sent all over the country checking up on potential illegal activity...if you were adults they would have split you up in a heart beat to make better use of you two," said Mustang flatly. "As it stands, I was able to cover for keeping both of you together by pointing out that the two of you would naturally cover for each other until you're older and have more experience under your belt."
"How did you get us under your command though?" asked Alphonse.
"You two are already comfortable with me, and the generals underestimate you both because so far the only thing you've both demonstrated is that you're good at using premade circles on the fly and have previous combat training. Besides, some of the higher ups would get pretty nervous having two intelligent Investigative alchemists so close to the labs...there's no telling what you would find out and reveal to people they don't want knowing."
Edna smirked.
"So basically the guys above your paygrade agreed because they didn't want the headache of two curious kids butting their nose into official military secrets that are technically off the books and finding stuff that they technically shouldn't be playing around with," said Edna. "Especially those they can't pay off and will be given training to ask questions they really don't want answered."
Mustang's smirk said volumes.
"Since no one would have believed that a pair of kids could pass the exam on their first try, we don't have any official uniforms for you just yet," said Mustang.
Edna made a face.
"Do we have to wear them?"
"Only when on official business, otherwise no one is going to take you seriously as dogs of the military," said Mustang. "Unless you want to wear them full time to make the adults pay you the proper respect, but I would recommend sticking to civilian clothes otherwise."
"Because civilians will be more likely to talk to a couple of kids traveling to see 'grandma' or some other fictional relative, compared to two teenagers who recently joined the military," said Edna, already understanding why.
"That and it keeps me from having to hear people whine about employing child soldiers," agreed Mustang. "So long as you have the watch, you should be fine and if anyone asks you're undercover since no one would suspect a fourteen year old of being in the military or outranking someone."
