Santos campaign. Bedroom off the staff room during the Al Smith Dinner.

When Lou called me a few weeks later to offer me a job doing media in the Midwest corridor I was a little shocked. By this point I wasn't actively courting a job with the Santos campaign. I also wasn't surprised that Josh would have been tracking me and knew I had gone home to take a break from Washington and clear my head. The call from Lou came at just the right moment, too. After three weeks at home not doing much of anything except trying to hide the fact that I was nursing a long breaking heart (both because of my failed relationship with Josh and my failed love affair with the White House), I was beginning to remember why I'd left home in the first place.

One night around 6 p.m. the shrill, unexpected ringing of cell phone interrupted me as I struggled to help my mother by making our family dinner of overcooked chicken, potatoes and canned vegetables. Green beans really shouldn't explode all over the kitchen like that. Suzie homemaker I am not.

Lou clearly had my resume already, and as I talked with her – and talking is really what it was, it wasn't an interview, she was already aware of my work history and pretty eager to hire me - I remember thinking that I honestly thought Josh was more vindictive than this. Even in his peak points of desperation I couldn't recall him shutting someone down like he shut me down to turn around a few weeks later and beg me back, but I convinced myself that that's what was happening - at least on some level.

But, I also knew the sway women have on him. I was there when Amy used her position at NOW to try to tank one of his bills and then I watched not long after as he flirted right back into her bed. I think just a little bit of my ego convinced me that my history with him was driving it. Maybe he was still feeling guilty about not taking me back after the convention and now that the dust had settled this was his idea of a second chance.

So, what was there left to do but say yes and throw myself into my work? Since I was assigned to the Midwest, I could make Madison my home base, which gave my parents a rare opportunity to really see me in action, and I was doing good work. It was a far cry from working with the big campaign machine I was used to, but it was honest work and in only a week's time I had our local office ship shape and my local media strategy was even starting to bleed into Illinois where it was clear Josh had been avoiding spending precious ad dollars.

When Lou's deputy Otto called me to prepare me to make a statement on the abortion attack ad by the Committee for the Integrity of Human Life I was excited for the opportunity. This would be my opportunity to show Josh that I could be valuable on his team even if initially I'd been on the other side of the court. Plus, I was excited to be talking about something I believed in. Even if I've never had an abortion, the idea that a shriveled old white man who has no medical training could tell me what to do with my body is something I'd love to shout from the rooftops about. Although Otto's statement lacked the passion I would have added, it does the job and about and hour later, Lou called and told me to get on a plane to come meet with her in person.

At head quarters I find that I don't recognize anyone except Lou and Otto which I guess isn't that surprising. If Josh had been specifically avoiding hiring anyone who had worked on any of the competing campaigns, I'm not likely to see any of my former Russell campaign coworkers. Still, I thought it was odd that no one except Lou seemed to know that I used to work for Josh. Even the congressman asked me about my history as if he had no idea who I was prior to being "the chicken fighter." If Josh had made the call to hire me wouldn't he have explained our work history and why he wanted me even though I had a reputation as being Russell's chicken fighter? And, if not, wouldn't he even have just mentioned me?

After my whirlwind of introductions Lou shows me to a bedroom off the office and closes the door. I'm not left long to question why there is a bedroom off the staff room, but I have so many questions.

Suddenly the door opens again and Josh and Lou walk in. Josh is obviously surprised to see me. Awkward doesn't begin to describe it.

"I don't know what the problem is between you two," Lou declares, "but she's great on television and I don't care if she worked for Francisco Franco in the primary, right now it's all hands on deck. So work it out."

She hands Josh a folder and leaves abruptly closing the door behind her.

Me and Josh. Alone in a bedroom. Well if this isn't a triggering situation.

Now I'm really questioning why there is a bedroom in the office off the staff room and why she chose this as the place for me and Josh to work out our differences. What does she know about our relationship and really does she think that a bedroom off the staff office could be the best place to work something like that out… in THAT manner.

These thoughts don't seem to occur to Josh who actually pretends to go through the motions of interviewing me.

"References if we want to pursue this?" He says, his voice trying to sound annoyed and disinterested.

It's a crazy experience. I've worked for the man for years but he never interviewed me. I can't keep the sarcasm out of my voice as I answer his questions. He knows he needs me but he's determined to make my life hell in the meantime. It's good to see we've grown up and past our differences.

Then he drops it on me. "Did he tell you campaigns require loyalty; you don't go working for the other guy?"

Loyalty. So that's what it boils down to. It's not about anything more than loyalty?

Now I'm yelling. It's not the cathartic kind of yelling, though. I'm keeping my voice down and doing my best to keep it professional, though I do let a jab about Josh's hamburgers go.

We only have about 60 seconds to go at each other before Lou interrupts us and thank God she does because it was about to get ugly. The Donna of old would be questioning my place, but Lou's just made it even more clear that they need me and, regardless if Josh wants to hire me, Lou already has and is tasking me with my next assignment. Josh will just have to get over it.

The rose-colored glasses I've been wearing for the past few months have finally cleared and I feel the bitterness creep back into my veins a little bit. But I want to get a democrat elected this year so what is there to do but go to work. This is politics, baby, and my mentor has taught me that it's always a little personal.


Do I stop there? Do I keep going? I don't know. You tell me.