Harry was awoken by a sharp rap on the door down the hallway. Strange, he thought, disorientated. He fumbled for his glasses and his eyes adjusted to the dark of his cupboard. There it was again. Tap tap tap in quick succession. Harry raised himself up on his elbows. It was early. He felt a chill down the back of his neck, biting cold.
"I will protect your mind young Master" a deep voice faded into the back of his mind. As the ringing faded in his ears, he heard muffled voices by the door.
"Tuney" a voice low like velvet
"You people can't leave well enough alone"
"What are you doing here!"
The voices lowered; Harry couldn't hear properly any more. He crept closer to his locked cupboard door and heard scuffling then footsteps, the rustle of robes on carpet.
The door jerked open and Harry fell back, blinded momentarily by the light in the hallway, blinking as his eyes struggled to focus on the man standing in front of him. Snape! Harry felt a rush of elation. The man had never been kind but he had been so brave in his own way and had protected Harry until his dying breath, bleeding out on the floor of the shrieking shack. Harry supposed actually replying to McGonagall's letter would have allowed for a different approach than sending Hagrid on a wild Harry hunt across Great Britain.
Harry schooled his face into a look of suspicion. Hagrid was one thing, Harry was very fond of the man but he was utterly oblivious on so many levels, with his head so far up Dumbledore's arse he might as well have been a suppository. Snape on the other hand was anything but, Harry thought as he watched the man take in the state of him and his cupboard; his eyes flickering over the too small cot, bare lightbulb hanging, and most damningly resting on the door where scrawled in red crayon was written 'Harry's Room'.
"Who are you?" Harry demanded keeping any hint of recognition well away from his face. It wouldn't do to have Snape catching on too quickly and the man was terrifyingly perceptive. Maybe this time he would be able to get out of Summers under the loving care of the Dursleys. The man had sworn to protect him after all. Having acknowledged the state of his home life, returning him to them would surely tug at the man's vow.
Snape was furious. Harry could see it in the set of his shoulders and the tightening at his jaw. The only time Harry could remember having seen the man's resolute composure slipping before was that god-awful day he'd snooped in his pensieve. If he had been any less angry there would have been no physical evidence at all.
"My name is Severus Snape." he said in a short, clipped tone. "I am a Professor at Hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry. I understand you received your letter."
Harry thought for a moment. He wouldn't be able to pull off wide eyed, innocent and ignorant boy-who-lived. Not under close scrutiny from Severus Snape who would notice if your eyelash twitched in a contradictory direction. Well then, he was going to give them Tom Riddle 2.0 and see how they reacted.
"It's magic then? The things I can do? Aunt Petunia says I'm a freak but I'm not. I'm not mad" words tripping over themselves, he did still need to seem like a child. Then quieter, almost inaudibly "I thought the letter was a joke."
He could almost see steam coming from the man's ears, like he'd just taken a pepper-up for some nonexistent cold. "Your parents. Surely Headmaster Dumbledore..." the words came out of Snape's mouth through gritted teeth.
Harry saw an opportunity and interrupted "My parents died in a car crash Sir." be polite, the man had always demanded respect. "Who is Dumbledore?" and he'd done it there was a crack as the man lost control of his magic. The cupboard door cracked in two, Snape's magic was so thick in the air that Harry could almost taste it. He looked at Snape whose lips had thinned alarmingly.
"Get your things we're leaving." the words were clipped; Snape was having trouble containing himself. Harry scrambled to his feet; well, this would be interesting.
While Harry gathered his possessions, Severus Snape waited in the hallway his thoughts far away crashing against the boundaries of his occlumency shields. This was not what he had expected when he had left his office this morning. As they walked down the hall to leave Number 4 Privet Drive they passed Aunt Petunia who was trying to become one with the floral wallpaper of the hall. Severus loomed over her as Harry stood on the doorstep, he leant over her pushing into her personal space to whisper in her ear. "You will be hearing from me Tuney." And with that he swept passed her before throwing a scornful look back at the Dursley home, the older man taking Harry's smaller hand in his before disapparating with a crack.
They materialized in a place unfamiliar to Harry. Snape had obviously decided that he needed to take a moment to ascertain the true level of Harry's woeful ignorance of the magical world and if possible, remedy it before thrusting it upon an entirely unsuspecting child. They were in a small living room, it was clean, meticulously so but still had the air of somewhere unlived in and uncared for. The décor had certainly not been updated recently Harry thought as he took in the faded brown sofa and paisley pattern of the orange and brown carpet. Snape gestured for Harry to take a seat before sweeping from the room. Harry could hear the man pacing back and forth in what must be the kitchen, this was a muggle home it must have belonged to Snape's parents then he thought.
Harry almost would have felt sorry for Snape if the man would've allowed it. The man had been expecting a spoilt carbon copy of James Potter and probably geared himself up for a day of tolerance and snide remarks. Instead, he had been confronted with a cupboard, a stark reminder of the circumstances of his own childhood and Lily's eyes looking at him accusingly from a too thin face. Honestly, who had looked at Snape and thought it was ok to give the man the impossible, herculean task of shouldering his own staggering grief and explaining the circumstances of the death of the Potters to their child. Lily's child. Harry wanted to strangle them.
Severus Snape was pacing his kitchen, making tea the muggle way to occupy his hands which were otherwise clenching and unclenching into involuntary fists, was going through much the same if more expletive ridden thought process. His grief and guilt squeezing at his ribcage and crawling up his throat making it hard to breath. He busied himself putting together a tea tray, brown and white patterned china and a monstrosity of a teapot shaped like a chicken. God, he hated this place, he didn't know why he'd kept it or why he'd come here of all places. Looking out the window away from Spinners End at the row of terraced houses lining the rise of the hill towards the rest of Cokesworth he knew why. He leaned heavily on the countertop by the sink and heaved a deep sigh.
Severus went back through to the faded living room and placed the tea set down on the coffee table before drawing up a chair opposite the boy. Harry. They sat in silence for a moment taking the measure of each other. He looked at the boy who was sat straight with a blank expression on his face looking right back at Severus. He flickered his legilimency out but it just slid off the boy's mind, off shields that by all rights shouldn't be there. He was beginning to feel decidedly unnerved.
He heard the boy speak quietly breaking the moment of tension, "So, you're a wizard. And there are other people, people like us? People with magic." He took a slow sip of his tea.
Severus blinked, letting the previous thought go as he focused on the child in front of him looking so serious. Setting his teacup down with a soft clink of the china. He focused on a spot slightly above the boy's left eyebrow, not quite able to bring himself to look directly at those eyes again yet, "Indeed, Mr Potter. There are men and women all over the world, witches and wizards as we call them who have magic. You yourself will be attending Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry in order to learn to control your magic and hone your craft."
"Were my parents magical?"
Severus' heart skipped a beat and not in the good way. He thought he might have a stroke the way his heart was pounding, arrhythmia was not a good sign.
He made his decision. They couldn't hide the truth from the boy, he was infamous for Merlin's sake. The minute they set foot in Diagon Alley he would be mobbed. He just wished that someone else, anyone else had been the one to pick up this section of the list of incoming muggle raised students. Or, his mind supplied resentfully, that Albus had been considerate enough to realise this case would need special attention. He swallowed.
"You were told your parents died in a car crash." Not a question but he received a small, wary nod of confirmation from the boy.
"That is incorrect. Your parents, Lily and James were magical, we went to school together." he paused feeling like he was going to step off a cliff
"There was a war amongst wixen. It became brutal. Your parents were murdered in their home on the eve of Samhain 1981 by the Dark Lord. A wizard by the name of Lord Voldemort who was the leader of the wizards rebelling against those currently in power. There was a prophesy. The prophesy named you as the one who would be his downfall. He sought you out and your family was betrayed by the one who held the secret of your location. When he turned his wand on you to kill you, his spell rebounded, you were left with that scar and he has not been heard from since." he kept talking, Severus thought if he stopped, he wouldn't be able to get it all out and the boy deserved to know, he needed to be prepared. "You are the only known person to have survived such a curse. As such you are famed in our world."
The only sound breaking the silence was soft breaths, it seemed like it went on forever. The boy had lowered his eyes and looked like he was searching for the answers to the world in the bottom of his tea cup. Who knows, it's as good a place as any to look. They were sat there quietly for long minutes. Severus was complicit in this he thought, the guilt clawing at his throat again 'I was the one who delivered the prophesy. I did this.' he couldn't say it. What he could do was prepare the boy. He could see the boy was concealing his reactions, not ready to trust Severus with that yet perhaps. 'A Slytherin for sure' the thought ran through his mind. Not that that would be unexpected from what he had seen of his upbringing.
Albus would certainly not agree with how he had told the boy. Albus would have delivered the information in unequivocally frustrating dribs and drabs over lemon drops and grandfatherly smiles; not like a gavel coming down striking a life sentence. But he couldn't bring himself to let the child walk into this blind – that said he would have to get the child's eyesight checked today as well, those glasses were atrocious.
The child finally looked up from behind a curtain of messy black curls and Severus knew he had made the right choice as he searched his face, the boy had taken the information stoically and there was a look of determination in those deep green eyes; so like Lily's.
"Will you help me?" said the boy – no Harry
"In such ways as I can."
"We have to go for the things on my school list now don't we? Is there a way to hide my scar? You said I'm famous because of it. Because my parents are dead. I'm not ready. and people somehow think I defeated this wizard before I could even talk. I don't know enough about this world yet."
Severus nodded curtly, seeing that focusing his mind on the practical issues at hand was how the child was processing. He seemed like a smart boy and not very trusting of adults. Unsurprising really.
"Of course. Shall we depart?"
Harry nodded.
The interior of Flourish and Blott had that comforting smell of parchment and fresh ink, it was slightly too warm, paper birds were swarming overhead and there was a buzz of excitement as children rushed back and forth among the stacks searching out their schoolbooks for the year.
Narcissa Malfoy smiled indulgently at her little prince; only a slight upturn at the corners of her lips but there was a softness around her eyes if you were looking. Draco was so funny she thought, a miniature of his father, or trying to be at least. It was less impressive when you were 4ft 11. His nose was up in the air pontificating to the Parkinson's little girl, Pansy hanging off his every word. They were adorable. Narcissa was watching the children while Lucius took care of some business in Knockturn Alley. The Parkinsons having gone on ahead to make a lunch reservation at Perthro. She ran her eyes over the crowd, taking in the people around her and caught sight of a tall dark-haired man in swooping black robes.
"Wait here darling, don't move." She tapped her son on his shoulder.
Severus looked...Off. That was the only way to describe it. It was very unlike Sev not to acknowledge her, in fact if she hadn't thought it was impossible, she'd say he hadn't even registered her. She made her way around the circular shelves towards the man who was conversing in that quiet way of his with the child beside him, who had his full attention she could see. Strange; Severus had many qualities she admired. He did not have a fondness for interacting with children, an unfortunate quality in a school teacher. The child itself was small, first year then, certainly muggle raised. Rather delicate looking child, dark wavy hair and vivid green eyes. Awful ill-fitting clothes. She coughed quietly.
"Severus! It's such a pleasure to see you, we weren't expecting to run into you today."
"Lady Malfoy" he said lowly with a short bow.
"Come now Severus, please do introduce me to your charge here." she wanted to know who this child was that had managed to capture Severus Snapes undivided attention. There was tension there too, she could smell it. Lucius might be the politician of the two but he was greatly aided by his wife's sharp eye for the subtle tides of society. She extended her hand to the child.
"Harry, Harry Evans, I'm very pleased to meet you Lady Malfoy." he bent to kiss the air above her hand. Over the child's head she caught Severus' eye with a sharp look, he looked uncomfortable, she raised an eyebrow feeling a flash of concern sweep across her face.
This child's name was certainly not Evans. She held Severus' gaze raising her hand lightly to tuck a stray strand of hair behind her ear lingering on her right earlobe. A signal they had used years before in tense, dangerous meetings. 'We need to talk'. Severus sighed wearily.
The bright morning had given way to heavier skies drizzling warm summer rain. Harry looked up at the sky as they moved between stores gathering his Hogwarts supplies. He had an enormous amount of respect for Narcissa Malfoy. It would be a cold day in hell before he forgot the moment the woman had looked the Dark Lord Voldemort, a man so feared people wouldn't even say his name, dead in the eye and bare-faced lied. She was a formidable woman and he had spoken up at her trial, it had been one of the earlier ones and his influence had counted at that time. While Lucius had been sentenced to Azkaban, Harry's testimony had swung the sentence to house arrest only for Narcissa and Draco.
He blinked as the rain fell on his face and ran into his eyes, the sensation strange without his glasses. After stopping at Gringott's where Harry had feigned ignorance of goblin customs and the goblins had played along, sensing with their customary acuteness that he did not want to reveal his status to his companion, Snape had taken him straight to a magical optician round a corner Harry had never noticed before. Several tests, one occulus sanneo later and a lot of gold lighter Harry's vision had been corrected. Apparently, it could only be done before a certain age and once again Harry pushed aside a tendril of irritation towards his earlier ignorance of the magical world he lived in.
They had parted ways with the Malfoys outside Flourish and Blott's much earlier but Harry suspected he would be seeing them shortly. He hadn't had to say much after the introductions where he had caught the tightening of Narcissa's hand on Draco's shoulder when the latter had begun to sneer after he had introduced himself as 'Evans'. After an encouraging smile from his mother the blonde had decided his friendship must be deemed desirable for whatever reason and had begun prattling on. Harry found it quite nostalgic he thought as he trailed after Snape's long strides.
The man's company had been surprisingly pleasant Harry thought. Harry had asked a lot of questions to Snape, he wanted to maintain the act of someone new to the wizarding world and had listened carefully to the man's answers. While terse and sarcastic still his responses had been well thought out and informative. It seemed his venom was no longer to be aggressively directed at Harry. He let his thoughts slide away over the topic as they made their way to Madam Malkin's Snape having deemed it too crowded earlier in the day, not wanting to join 'the herd' as he put it.
Narcissa was waiting for them at Madam Malkin's. She and Draco had separated from the Parkinsons after lunch as they had had another engagement to get to and Lucius had called one of the family house elfs to take their purchases home before heading to the ministry himself to check in on his office. As soon as the boys were settled standing on stools, tape measure flying around them as Malkin fussed with the hem of Draco's robe she withdrew to one side of the shop appearing to examine the different fabrics on offer for tailored clothing and signalled for Severus to join her.
She waited as he threw up a quick muffliato, you could never be too careful, before taking him gently by the wrist. "Evans?" she said and waited knowingly. Severus had become like a brother to her over the years, as god-father to her son he was family and Narcissa had a long memory.
"Potter" he answered resigned to her interrogation. Good. Her eyes widened almost imperceptibly at the confirmation. She had guessed certainly; it was the logical conclusion but that wasn't the only observation she had made of the boy. She waited patiently for him to continue.
"His muggle relatives...Merlin I..they were keeping him in a cupboard under the stairs...He didn't know...they had told him James and Lily died in a car crash of all things Cissy." Oh Severus, her eyes had been wide, but her lips thinned as her dear friend came to the end of what he had needed to tell her earlier. It was unusual for him to be so incoherent but now she understood why. They would figure it out like they always did. However, if she knew Severus Snape, which she did he would not be returning the boy to where he came from tonight and stubborn as he was would never admit he needed company and support just now.
"You are both welcome to join us at the manor this evening, in fact I insist." Let him wiggle out of this one.
Harry looked up at the folds of light blue silk making up the canopy hanging over the four-poster bed he was lying in. They looked like waves he thought, letting his eyes adjust to the darkness. He felt a tight knot of guilt curl in his gut, Snape had been so quick to take him away from the Dursleys and Narcissa to welcome him into her home, even knowing who he really was, which she clearly had. They had remedied that mis-introduction on returning to Malfoy manor. Draco's face had been a picture. Harry snorted softly.
He had never liked being dishonest, it didn't come naturally to him. And he was used to surviving independently of the adults around him, he wasn't used to people trying to take care of him and it made his chest tighten. Least of all Snape. He shut his eyes willing away the memory of blood, hot and red on the floor of the shrieking shack.
He lay on his back listening to the creaks and groans of the old house. He could use this opportunity to get his hands on the first piece of Voldemort's soul. The largest soul piece. The diary was in the library here. The diadem he could collect at Hogwarts. He had access to the locket at Grimauld place and could use his illusioned heir ring to portkey him through the wards there. The ring would require an excursion to Little Hangleton. The cup was a problem. It would be the most difficult of the horcruxes for him to access. He pushed himself up on his elbows then swung his legs out over the side of the bed. Harry set out on bare feet on wooden floorboards, creeping out of his room through the heavy door which creaked slightly and shut with a soft click behind him.
Harry padded quietly down the hallway, keeping close to the wall as he passed a doorway under which soft firelight flickered and quiet voices issued. Part of him wanted to stop and listen to the soft murmurs. He kept going his heart beating quickly in his breast. The warmth of the room receding as the distance opened up between them, the floorboards growing cold again beneath his feet. The corridor went on and on, he crept passed slumbering portraits until he turned a left and stopped, his breath caught for a moment.
It was beautiful, the corridor had opened up into a hallway, one side of which was entirely floor to ceiling windows and the view was breathtaking; reaching over tamed gardens and out onto rolling fields, the sky a deep midnight blue and clouds rolling lazily across a bright moon which seemed almost too round, too full to be real. It felt like he could see every star in the sky; a masterpiece untouched by human hands.
In the drawing room the hearth crackled comfortingly, Severus sat back in a winged leather chair and watched the shifting of the logs and the occasional spark of coal bulleting past the guard to land by his feet. One side of his body was almost too warm, he could feel the heat on his face from the fire flickering beside him. The glass in his hand felt cool with the large ball of ice floating in the amber liquid within.
Narcissa was leaning on the armrest of a deep, green sofa her eyes fixed on her friend "Knut for your thoughts Severus?" she said finally, trying to draw him out.
"He's different than I thought he would be Cissa. Very reserved. And there's something I cannot put my finger on yet."
She nodded acknowledging his point, then tilted her head to the side "That is only to be expected Sev, you told me who he was raised by and how he has been treated. He's very polite all things considered. You yourself were not the most forthcoming of children if I might remind you...remember that time you spiked 'Dromeda's pumpkin juice for, and I quote 'mothering' you, you sulked in that spare classroom in the dungeons for a week. Not that much has changed there" she said dryly. "Give him time it's a big adjustment."
"Hmm" he took a slow sip from his glass.
Narcissa sat up and leaned forward to him "You can't change what has already passed. You would not have been allowed to raise Harry, Sev, you know that. Not with that mark on your arm."
His eyes darkened and flickered towards the doorway.
"Severus?"
He held up one hand in a cautionary gesture, setting his glass to one side and rising to his feet. He'd seen a shadow pass at the foot of the doorway, he crossed the room, put his ear to the wooden panel of the door and listened as soft footsteps faded away down the hallway. He waited a minute then followed robes rustling against the floorboards.
"It's quite a sight don't you agree?"
Harry inhaled sharply, caught off guard by the low voice coming from the darkness behind him, shoulders stiffening.
Severus walked to join the boy looking out the window gazing out at the view. He hesitated then rested one hand on Harry's shoulder. "Couldn't sleep?"
"hmm"
Severus looked away from the moon and down at the top of the boy's head and his unruly dark hair in contemplation. He felt the boy relax slowly under the weight of his palm. They stood side by side for a long while. He would be there for this child. Merlin knows it was unlikely to be an easy life, something Severus would know all too well. "Come on back to bed. It will be a long day tomorrow. I will wake you in the morning before we head to the train station." They turned and he guided the boy back to his rooms.
Harry heard the door close with a click behind him and lay back again under the blue silk awning. Tonight had been unsuccessful but he knew the layout of the manor better now. It was probably for the best anyway; to avoid drawing attention to his horcrux search before he found a way to retrieve the cup. He would try again to retrieve the diary at Yule. He closed his eyes and let sleep pull him away.
