Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to any Batman character in this work. I only own Carmel and any other made up characters throughout the story.


"Egghead?" I asked with surprise. I had heard of Egghead before, but for some reason, he did not seem like the type of guy who would work with Scarecrow. Although, come to think of it, not many villains did seem likely to work with Scarecrow.

"Yes. We'll need his expertise in order to start my master plan," The Scarecrow replied.

"Which is?"

He chuckled. "We'll get there. First, though, we need to acquire some capital for our endeavor. And for that, we need Egghead."

"He loans out money?"

"No. We will need to rob a bank."

"Oh okay. Pretty casual," I remarked. Sometimes I forget what a crazy job I took on!

He shot me a look. "I doubt that you have ever robbed a bank before. In my younger years, it was possible for me to do it on my own. Now, not so much."

"You robbed a bank by yourself?"

"With the right fear gas, it could be done." He explained no further, despite my desire to hear that story. "Regardless, I certainly can't do it anymore, even though my mobility has been steadily improving. Thus, we're going to need some help."

"Ah, so that's where Egghead comes in. We're going to have his crew help us."

"Wrong again. If you would let me finish… Egghead is indeed a genius, and he usually knows the location of many of Gotham's supercriminals. Thus, we are going to get in touch with Egghead so that he can connect us with a crew that is about to rob a bank."

"That makes sense. But why not ask the Riddler? Doesn't he do that stuff too?"

"He does. But talking to Edward is usually not an enjoyable experience, unless you like being lectured to and condescended to death. I hear Egghead is more genteel, although I have yet to speak with him."

"Oh?"

"However, I arranged for you to meet with him tomorrow evening. I will not be attending."

That alarmed me. "What? Why not?"

"Part of the mystique of being the Scarecrow requires mystery and fear. The less appearances I make, the better. Besides, you are more than capable of doing this."

While I was pleased that he felt that I was capable of such an important task, I was a little worried about negotiating with Egghead. "I'm not sure that I can relay all of your plan to him."

"No worries. You will primarily serve as the messenger this evening. You'll be calling me and I will be speaking to Egghead. I wouldn't expect you to be negotiating. Yet."

I nodded my head. "Alright, let's give it a go."


The next day passed quickly, although I spent most of it thinking about the job I was going to do that night. I didn't see much of Scarecrow, as he spent most of the day working on the liquid fear toxin. Now that I finally had some downtime, I went ahead and finished unpacking my things and organizing my new room. I also had to do a lot of cleaning of both my bedroom and bathroom because there was no way I was going to live in the "rundown haunted house" vibe that Scarecrow seemed to be going for. Being an evil villain is not an excuse for being clean! While I obviously couldn't fix the cracks and dents in the wall, I could make it less grimy. By the time I was done, it looked certainly cheerier than the rest of the Corn Palace.

Nightfall eventually arrived and the Scarecrow revealed the last parts of the plan. "Now, you'll need to wear something that will show his henchman that you work for me," he explained.

"What exactly did you have in mind? I was hoping I'd never have to wear that bracelet again."

He scoffed. "No, no. I have something in mind, but you may not like it."

"Oh?"

"Well, since I'm the Scarecrow, I thought something more country-esque would suffice. Maybe something flannel?"

I laughed. It was absurd, but it did make sense. The supervillain life calls for more stereotypical outfits than other professions, I guess. "So you want me to dress up like I was if I was going as a cowgirl for Halloween?"

"It sounds silly, and we certainly can have you design your own look in the future, but since the meeting is tonight, I thought it was as good as we can do."

Well, that's very far away from my style, so I've got nothing to help. "I'm not sure that I…" I trailed off as I saw him point to a shopping bag on the counter. I walked over to the bag and found a flannel shirt, a cowboy hat, and some somewhat obnoxious cowboy boots. I also found a holster there. "Did this come with the boots or something?"

"Nope. You'll need it." He headed back into his room and came back out holding a gun.

"Are you fucking kidding me?! You think I know how to use one? Or that I would shoot someone?"

"You need to be able to defend yourself. You're meeting with elements of the criminal underworld. Of course, it will be taken from you upon your meeting with Egghead. It's just for the time in-between," he explained as if it was the most casual thing in the world.

"I'd rather not. Won't some fear toxin be good enough?"

"I'm going to send some with you also. But you're taking the gun as well. There will be no further debate on that," he growled.


And that was how I found myself parking right by a very sketchy Gotham City alley. I would never come here, even in my old career! I could see why Scarecrow sent me with the gun, but I was still uncomfortable about it. Although, that might have had something to do with the fact that I looked like I was going to a Halloween party dressed in my flannel shirt, jeans, cowboy hat, boots, and holster. I clutched the briefcase that Scarecrow had given me, slightly apprehensive of what was to come.

Two gentlemen immediately appeared from the alley, and my heart stopped. Hope they work for Egghead or this is going to get messy quick! Fortunately for me, they were exactly who I was looking for.

"Are you Carmel Ocean?" one of them asked.

"Depends. Who's asking?"

"Friends of Egghead," the other man replied.

"Perfect. Then yes, I am," I answered.

"Good." His eyes had clearly wandered to my chest.

"My eyes are up here, gentlemen. A really pretty green that you're missing out on," I smugly replied. Yeah, that was probably a little reckless, but I felt that showing confidence was key in this type of business.

The man cleared his throat. "We'll take you to see you to see Mr. Egghead. I'm Sonny and this is HB," the first man replied.

"Nice to meet you." They led me through a door in the alley into some sort of abandoned building. We walked through many different rooms until we finally approached a room filled with light.

"I'll need your weapon," HB told me.

"Of course."

He took the gun from me, and I was happy to be rid of the thing. He then conducted a quick patdown, which I also expected. That's why I had my emergency fear toxin stuffed into my bra.

Sunny then opened the door and led me into Egghead's office. Unsurprisingly, the office had a yellow and white décor about it. And there, sitting in his trademark white and yellow suit was the dapper Egghead. Gotta love Gotham supervillains.

"Ah, Ms. Ocean, you made it!" He rose from his desk and immediately came over to me. He grabbed my hand and kissed it. "We are most fortunate to be in the presence of such beauty, aren't we gentlemen? And such beautiful eyes, might I add." Truly a gentleman indeed.

The two men grunted their approval as Egghead led me to a chair across from his desk. After he got me settled, he then return to his chair. "Ms. Ocean, it is indeed a pleasure to meet you. You can imagine my surprise that the Scarecrow reached out to me for business, as he has never done that before. But that's eggsactly why I took the meeting! And then, to find out that he has such a beautiful assistant? One surprise after another."

"Oh, you're too kind, Mr. Egghead. Dr. Crane felt that you were the perfect person to reach out. Your reputation precedes you."

"Well, making business deals is my eggspertise," he said with a smile. "Now what is it that the Scarecrow wants?"

"Let's find out. I'm just the messenger. He asked that I set up this call with you," I explained.

"Eggcellent! One question, my dear. How should I address him?"

"He prefers to be called Dr. Crane." I grabbed my phone and dialed Scarecrow's number, immediately putting it on speakerphone.

"This is Dr. Crane," his voice called out.

"I'm here with Mr. Egghead," I said.

"Greetings to you, Mr. Egghead," Crane began.

"The same to you, Dr. Crane. I must say that I'm curious as to what you set up this meeting for. My secretary said you didn't provide any details."

"That is correct. These days, one can't be too careful. That's why I've sent Ms. Ocean instead of calling you directly."

"Of course, with that flying rodent around, we can never be too sure."

"I'm calling because I need your assistance. I'm gearing up for my master plan that will bring Gotham to its knees. However, I will need to raise some capital, which is where you come in."

"I appreciate the call, but I am not a bank, Dr. Crane. I really don't loan money out to other supercriminals. It would egghaust my funds too quickly," Egghead replied.

"Of course. But you can put me in touch with someone who might be able to. I've been told that you usually know the whereabouts of my criminals. I was hoping that you would be able to put me in touch with some criminals that are planning on robbing a bank. You could connect me to them and then I could work with them to obtain the funds that I require."

"That's a very interesting proposal. It's certainly something that I can eggsecute. That is, if the price is right."

Scarecrow chuckled. "I figured as much. Which is why I didn't send Ms. Ocean empty-handed. Carmel, please get out the presents for Mr. Egghead."

I did as he told me, reaching down to my briefcase and opening it up, revealing two syringes filled with a sort of orange-brownish liquid as well as a flip phone.

"I have heard that you are a collector, Mr. Egghead, so I thought I would bring an item that is exceptionally rare: some of my fear toxin," Scarecrow droned on.

Probably a good call that he didn't go the obvious egg pun there! I saw Egghead's eyes widen in surprise and a huge smile broke out on his face.

"Oh that is simply marvelous! Perfectly eggcellent!" But then his face soured. "But how do I know that it's real?"

"And that is why I brought two samples. If you have a test subject, Ms. Ocean can demonstrate how it works," Crane explained.

"Of course. Hard Boiled, can you go grab that fool who broke in here earlier in the day?" Egghead asked his minion.

I could barely contain my laughter as I realized what HB's name stood for. Of course, that put Sunny's name in a different context as well.

HB quickly returned with what appeared to be a homeless man. He looked to be conscious, but not by much. "See, I knew that not eggsecuting him right away was a good call," Egghead gleefully said.

"Carmel, go ahead and inject one dose into the patient," Scarecrow replied. His use of the word 'patient' is…interesting. I grabbed the first syringe and walked over to the bum. I was a little apprehensive about giving him the toxin, but I knew that it wouldn't be fatal. I injected one of the two doses in the syringe to the man and stepped back. HB let go of the man and backed up as well.

The fear toxin worked almost immediately. The man's eyes opened wide as looked at Egghead. "No, no! Don't kill them Egghead! Don't kill my family! I'll-I'll…Oh my god. What are you doing?" The man started to back away. "He's…he's becoming a giant egg! Do any of you guys see this? Help! Help! Egg Monster!" The men turned to try to flee and instead smashed into the wall. He got up and stumbled around. "He's trapped me in an eggshell! Please don't hurt me!" the man screamed. He crawled into the fetal position and rocked back and forth.

"Splendid. Simply marvelous!" Egghead replied, clapping his hands together. "Sunny, you can take him away." Sunny did as he was told.

"It sounded as if it was successful," Scarecrow said.

"Yes, sir, Dr. Crane," I replied.

"Dr. Crane, I'm most impressed with your toxin. I accept your present gladly and will work my magic to get you an eggcellent partner."

"It is greatly appreciated. Carmel will provide you with a burner phone to contact us. Unless you have any further questions, I'll end the conversation," Scarecrow replied.

"No, I believe we're good. It has been a pleasure doing business with you, Dr. Crane."

"Likewise," Scarecrow finished. He then hung up.

I then took the flip phone from the briefcase and handed it to Egghead. "Only number on there is the one you need." I then set the briefcase on his desk.

"Perfect. You have provided me with eggactly what I need. It's been an egghilarating experience meeting you, Ms. Ocean!"

"You're too kind, Mr. Egghead. The pleasure is all mine."

"Gentlemen, can you escort this delightful lady to her vehicle? Safe travels, my dear."

HB and Sunny then led me out of Egghead's office and through the hideout until we arrived to the alley. Sunny returned me my pistol, which I immediately holstered.

"Thank you very much, boys."

"Of course," was Sunny's crisp reply.

I then hopped into my car and started the drive back to the Corn Palace. I was abuzz with the excitement about successfully completing my job, as well as marveling at how Scarecrow's toxin affected that man. I had never seen the toxin applied to anyone else, as I was the only one to receive in my presence. Gotham, you better watch out!


Hey there everybody! As promised, here's one more update before we head into 2020. As always, thank you to all of you readers! Please feel free to review the story and let me know how you feel about it. Hope you enjoy and have a eggcellent new year!

Se ya real soon,

The Mustachioed Academic