Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to any Batman characters in this work. I only own Carmel and any other made up characters throughout the story.


On the counter in the kitchen sat the burner phone that Scarecrow used for his dealings with Egghead. I will admit that I was not very patient waiting for it to ring. It had been two days since I met with Egghead and given him the burner, and I was starting to worry that something had gone wrong. Scarecrow, however, seemed less worried than I.

"Don't you think he would have called by now?" I asked him

He sighed. "Not necessarily. It's not like major robberies are executed every night in Gotham, even if it feels that way. When Egghead finds something, he'll call us. Besides, master plans only succeed with great patience."

He was right, of course, but I sorely lacked the patience. In my defense, this was my first job as a henchman working for a super criminal, so I was a little eager to get the show on the road. In hindsight, I probably was also a little anxious. Up until this point, I had not technically done anything too illegal in my work for Scarecrow. I delivered a phone for him, which wasn't illegal. I guess I did give that poor guy back at Egghead's some fear toxin, but that didn't kill him. I mean, Egghead might have had the guy killed, but the toxin alone didn't kill him. So really, I was still pretty clean. But robbing a bank? That would definitely cross the line past the point of no return for my new life.

When the call finally did come, I practically leapt off the couch and rushed over to the phone in order to get it. But I knew that Scarecrow wanted the call, so I brought it into his bedroom/lab.

"See?" was all he said to me before he answered the phone. "Hello?...Yes, very good to hear from you too, Egghead…No worries, as long as you found someone suitable…No, but I've heard of him…That is wonderful, you certainly didn't have to do that…Your service far exceeded my expectation…Yes, I'm ready." Scarecrow then wrote down a phone number. "I've got it. Thank you for your assistance…Take care." With that, the phone call was over.

I looked at him with great anticipation. "Well?" I asked.

"Well what?" he replied in a nonchalant manner.

"Don't you dare do this to me," I seethed.

A ghostly chuckle escaped his lips. "Egghead was able to find someone that is planning an upcoming bank robbery. Have you ever heard of the Cavalier?"

I wracked my brains, feeling that the name was somewhat familiar. "Doesn't he dress like Robin Hood?"

"No, not Robin Hood, but like a musketeer. Sword, plumed hat and all."

"Oh, yes. Not a top tier villain."

Scarecrow attempted a smile. "No, which makes him perfect for our plan. A lesser profile bank robbing should help keep the spotlight away from my operation."

Thinking about what the news might mean for me, I pushed on. "Alright, so do you need me to go visit this Cavalier and set things up?"

He shook his head. "I expected I would need to, but Egghead already did that for me. He reached out to the Cavalier, explained that I wanted in on the heist, and got Cavalier's approval. Not sure how he managed to do that, but he's given me a number to call the Cavalier to put together details."

"Well, aren't you going to go ahead and call him back?" I asked.

"I will shortly. The negotiations may take a while but I will be able to inform you of our terms of agreement once you return from your shift."

Shit, I realized. I had nearly forgot that I was about to go to work. "Alright, but don't leave anything out. This is exciting stuff!" I explained to my boss. For him, this was probably a routine sort of job. But for me, it all was exhilarating and the first real step taken towards Scarecrow's master plan, whatever it was.

"Oh of course," he finished.

All throughout my shift at the Gotham Casino I thought about what the details of this heist would be. For example, would I need to use a gun and a bulletproof vest? Would we be sneaking in and not using any force? And more importantly, what was I going to wear? My cliché Scarecrow henchman outfit was supposed to be a temporary thing but it seemed like I would be using it again for the robbery.

Mercifully for me, my shift was not a long one and I eagerly returned to the Corn Palace to hear the details of our plan. When I returned, Scarecrow was sitting in the recliner watching the 10 o'clock news.

"Hey there! Any exciting happen in Gotham City today?" I asked.

"Nothing too major," he replied without looking at me. "The Batman captured Condiment King, but that's about it."

"So tell me about the negotiations!"

"Very well, child. The number that Egghead gave me was specifically for Mr. Mortimer Drake, which is the real name of the Cavalier. He told me that Egghead had contacted him about me wanting to get in on the job and then we could negotiate exactly how it was to proceed. I told him that it would be best if he explained to me his current plan and I could then explain how I would add more effectiveness. The Cavalier's initial plan was to roll up at night with a bunch of large trucks to Gotham Bank. Inside these large trucks would be cannons."

"Cannons? You mean like bazookas or machine guns?" I asked.

"No, literal cannons since that's kind of Cavalier's shtick. Cannons were to be fired, blasting the bank open and hopefully incapacitating a number of the guards. Then, his armed men storm in, rob the bank, hop back in the trucks, and be on their merry way."

"It's a simple plan, but it could be effective," I offered. "A bit gaudy though."

"That is more or less what I thought about the subject. I proposed an even more effective way of dealing with security then simply blasting the bank with cannon fire. I offered him the use of a sort of toxin that could be fired with the canon that would help incapacitate the guards. The only difference for his band would be that they would need to wear gas masks in order so the toxin would not affect them. You and I could join the henchmen; they would take their money that they want from the bank and we would take out the money we want and that would be the end of our business arrangement. So basically, I offered to enhance his cannonballs with a toxin and then in exchange we would get to be in the bank and take whatever we wanted while the Cavalier's forces were doing the same."

"That seems like a reasonable plan," I replied.

"Yes, I thought so and so did the Cavalier. The only thing that Mr. Drake and I were hung up on what type of toxin I would use. He wanted me to use fear toxin as it's probably the only toxin he knows. I explained to him that part of the reason that I was trying to rob a bank with someone else with that so my identity would remain more hidden as I was not ready to come out yet. So, I suggested that I would use a different type of nerve gas or toxin and after a few back-and-forth's I manage to convince him of my position and he acquiesced. Therefore, we will need to get enough neurotoxin for these cannonballs and then we'll be ready to go rob the bank."

"Seems simple enough. So boss, when are we doing this?"

"That's the thing. The heist is tomorrow evening so we will have very little time to prepare, especially because I need to whip up this nerve toxin batch beforehand. And I will need your assistance to do that. As such, you will need to call into work and either trade shifts or take a sick day or something because I will need you all day tomorrow for the preparation and then the heist itself."

Fine by me, this will be much more exciting. "I should be able to do that."

"Excellent. You may wish to get a good night's sleep then because we are going to be very busy tomorrow."


Busy is the understatement of the year, I found myself thinking as I handed Dr. Crane another vial the next day. He decided on creating a neurotoxin that would cause paralysis and a lot needed to be done to create enough of these. The containers for this toxin needed to be small enough to fit into a cannonball, so each chemical batch had to then be separated into small glass vials that would easily break upon impact.

"Will, um, this toxin permanently paralyze the security guards?" I asked. I was slowly accepting the life of a supervillain henchman, but that doesn't mean that I was okay with killing people.

Scarecrow stopped what he was doing and turned to look at me, squinting his eyes. "I suppose it depends."

"On what?"

"On how quickly they receive medical attention."

Well done. He had crafted a perfect answer to my question, as it didn't explicitly answer my question, but also shifted some of the burden off of him and onto the medical experts. Of course, he could have been lying. I would never know. That was something I had to start to accept when working with Scarecrow. At this point, he certainly did not confide into me all of the details of his plan. In fact, I was basically on a need to know basis with him.

It was the early afternoon when he addressed my question about what I was to wear. "You are going to need a mask," he said to me out of the blue. "We don't want you inhaling any of this toxin."

"That would be the goal, yes," I retorted.

"You're going to have to use one of my old masks, as I don't currently have any here. Obviously, I'm not in need of them anymore," he growled.

That was true. His face and his mask were basically melded together. I knew that he wouldn't need a gas mask, as he appeared to have one grafted to his throat. "Let's see what you've got," I asked.

He led me over to a closet. Seeing what he wanted, he pulled down a dusty box. "There should be at least one in here. Haven't been used in a couple of years, but I always kept extra masks in those days," he explained. Opening the box, he pulled a mask that certainly was scary.

The mask was basically a burlap mask with eyeholes cut in it. It was stitched together to look like it formed a Scarecrow mouth beneath the eyes, with a gas mask built into it. There was also a broken noose that was tied around the base of the neck portion of the mask.

The Scarecrow chuckled upon seeing it. "Ah, yes, the good old days." He turned to me. "We can remove the noose if you would like. It was simply there for dramatic effect."

"No, let's keep it. I'm going to need to generate all the fear I can, cause I'm guessing I'm going to be terrified tonight," I said in reply.

"That's wonderful," he replied.

I mentally facepalmed, momentarily forgetting that he loved fear. "Can I try it on?"

He hesitated, something that I didn't expect from him. "You know, no one has even worn the Scarecrow mask instead of me."

I raised an eyebrow. "Getting sentimental? I can just die without a mask if that's what you prefer."

He shook his head. "With that type of sass, maybe I should," he grumbled.

"You know you love me."

As expected, Scarecrow did not respond to that, but moved on. "You won't need anything else special. Just wear all black as we are attempting to be stealthy," he finished.

"Okay, I'll see what I can throw together." I took the mask with me and headed across the apartment to my bathroom. I was eager to try on the mask and see how scary I looked. I was impressed with the results. I hardly recognized myself in the terrifying mask. This is going to be fun.

The rest of the afternoon and evening was more of the same, with me assisting Dr. Crane in the completion of the neurotoxin and then loading of the cannonballs. He seemed to be satisfied with the results of the toxin. He briefly left in order to go pick up the cannonballs from some of the Cavalier's men. I found out that the Cavalier was going to pick us up at a subway station not too far from the Corn Palace. I wasn't exactly sure how that was going to go, but I generally try to limit the number of questions that I ask Scarecrow. Even though I was new to this whole henchman thing and would understandably have many questions, I didn't want to annoy him or make him think that I was stupid.

Scarecrow's guidance allowed me to assemble my outfit for the evening. I put my hair in a low bun so I could better wear the Scarecrow mask. Since I needed to wear all black, I decided that I might as well be comfortable. I selected a turtleneck and yoga pants. Yeah, obviously not the pinnacle of fashion, but it covered me up, was black, and was comfortable. Scarecrow hadn't said anything about covering up, but I would be lying if I said I wasn't a little nervous and was taking extra precautions just to be safe. Since I figured running would be involved, I went with some black sneakers as well.

Scarecrow nodded in approval when I walked out in my outfit for the night. He was holding two burlap sacks.

"For the money?" I presumed.

"Correct. Back in the day I tried garbage bags, but there's nothing more embarrassing than your bag full of stolen money ripping as you are trying to get away. These burlap sacks are more practical and fit my aesthetic as a bonus."

"That makes sense," I replied as I took one of the sacks from him.

We then went ahead and loaded up the sacks with the eight neurotoxin cannonballs that we had produced, putting four in each one. I lifted a sack to test the weight and found myself surprised. "Fuck, these are heavier than I expected."

The Scarecrow blinked in confusion. "Cannonballs aren't usually known for being light. Regardless, we only have to lug them to the subway station."


Finally, the time for the heist arrived. A little before 10 o'clock, Scarecrow and I headed out of the Corn Palace and to the subway station. I put my mask in my sack, not intending to wear it until it was time to enter the bank. The Scarecrow kept his head down, letting his hood and the darkness obscure his face. We didn't encounter many people, as the Corn Palace was decently far away from the heart of Gotham City.

Fortunately for my nerves, we did not have to wait outside of the subway station very long. A black limousine pulled up and the driver came out. "Dr. Crane, I presume?"

"That's right."

The driver opened a door for us and we entered the limo. There, in all of his 17th century glory, the Cavalier was waiting for us. He was dressed pretty much how I expected him to be. Bold choice with the orange and green color scheme, I thought to myself. He had long black hair, a thin, waxed black mustache, and a goatee.

"Welcome, Dr. Crane. It's so nice to finally meet you in person," he began.

"Likewise," the Scarecrow responded.

"And who is this pretty maiden accompanying you? Your daughter?"

I was going to be offended, but I realized that it was possible, age-wise, that the Scarecrow was old enough to be my father.

"No," Scarecrow quickly responded, clearly embarrassed.

"My apologies! Your girlfriend then?"

Here I had to work hard to stifle a laugh.

"No," Scarecrow replied indignantly. "This is my assistant, Carmel Ocean."

"Nice to meet you," I quickly interjected.

"Ah, 'assistant.' Say no more," the Cavalier replied, winking at me. I mentally rolled my eyes, but did not attempt to correct him. "We're heading off to my warehouse. There we will pick up the trucks and cannons and then it's off to Gotham National Bank."

"Excellent. There were no difficulties in whipping up the toxins, and Carmel and I loaded up the eight balls," Crane said.

"Must have been difficult for Carmel, having to load balls instead of emptying them." He laughed at his innuendo, but neither Scarecrow nor I did. "But in all seriousness, I don't anticipate any trouble with the cannonballs. You are the expert, after all." His eyes lit up. "I'm quite excited to see your work."

I realized that it probably was a big deal for a lesser villain like the Cavalier to be working with a big shot like the Scarecrow. And it's a big deal for me, too. Tonight is my first test!


We didn't stay at the warehouse very long. The two cannons were already loaded onto pick-up trucks, as well as some ramps to roll the cannons down. Some henchmen took the cannonballs from us and loaded the first ball into each cannon.

"You know, these are authentic 1600s cannons," the Cavalier had explained to us on the tour of the warehouse he gave.

In my opinion, the entire plan was ridiculous. There was certainly no need to bomb a bank via cannon fire. It would definitely attract unneeded attention, which seemed like something you would not want to do if you were trying to be discrete. But it wasn't my plan, so I guess we're going to just roll with it.

Scarecrow and I rode with the third vehicle, an armored car. This was where the Cavalier's henchmen would be putting their money. Including the Cavalier, there were ten men on the job. Apparently the Cavalier's aesthetic only went so far, as his men were armed with guns and not swords. If the plan went right, the guns wouldn't be needed, as the gas would incapacitate all of the guards.

We arrived at the bank, parking across the street. I was impressed with the speed that the ramps were set up and the cannons brought down. My mask had already made an impression, as some of the henchman had done a double take upon seeing me exit the armored car.

"Alright, gentlemen, it's time to begin," the Cavalier announced. "You may fire when ready. For king and country!"

I'll admit I have never seen a cannon fire in person, but it was pretty cool to see it happen. After that, things got pretty chaotic. Alarms immediately started blaring and I could hear some shouts and the release of the gas. The second cannon fired, adding to the chaos. The front doors were basically nonexistent now having been blasted away. The first cannon was reloaded and soon was able to fire again.

A security guard stumbled out to fire at us, but the Cavalier's goons quickly gunned him down. The barrage would continue with three more cannonballs before the Cavalier signaled to stop.

"We'll hold these last two. May not need them. Onward!" he cried out. He and his men put on gas masks and then he led seven into the bank.

"Follow my lead," Scarecrow said and then he started walking into the bank. Since we were unarmed, we had no desire to run into the bank right away, letting the Cavalier and his men to clear things out if necessary.

As we stepped into the bank, I could see the cloud of toxin hanging like a sheet over the floor. There were several guards down on the ground, one or two which seemed to be spasaming, indicating that the gas was effective. Seeing that made me particularly grateful for my gas mask. Heading deeper into the bank, I heard some gunshots, but that didn't seem to deter the Scarecrow.

We made our way up to where the Cavalier and company were, sidestepping a few bodies on the way. The goons had just managed to somehow get the large vault door open, revealing stacks and stacks of cash.

"Marvelous. Simply marvelous," the Cavalier crowed. "This is working even better than I expected. Your toxins are as advertised!"

"I should hope so. Carmel, start filling up a bag. Remember, don't overload it because we have to carry it."

"You got it," I replied. I had never seen so much money in my life and was amazed to be handling so many stacks of one hundred dollar bills.

"Here, let me help you with that," the Cavalier added. "Frank, you fill this up for the Scarecrow." Scarecrow handed his bag to Frank, who started filling it with cash. "Way less bloodshed than I had thought. You're a magician," the Cavalier gushed.

Scarecrow was a man who showed few emotions and didn't seem to care about the Cavalier's praise. "I'm am also pleased with how the gas worked. Very effective."

A voice crackled on a walkie-talkie hanging on the Cavalier's belt. "Boss, the police are on their way. Probably got about eight minutes. Before the bastards show up."

"Got it, Jason. Start getting those cannons loaded up. We should be out shortly," the Cavalier responded.

A minute later, I had filled my bag to the level that I felt was proper. "Good to go here," I called out.

"Splendid. Well, it has been entertaining, but I believe that it is time that Carmel and I take our leave," the Scarecrow announced.

"Very well. It has certainly been an honor, Dr. Crane. Feel free to team up with me anytime!" the Cavalier praised as Frank handed Scarecrow the filled sack of money.

Scarecrow nodded. "I will definitely keep that in mind."

"Excellent. Nice meeting you, Carmel. Make sure to please your lord tonight!" he added with a guffaw.

God what a prick. "Oh yes," was all I said, not wanting to be around the Cavalier any longer than I had to be.

With that, the Scarecrow and I hoisted up our sacks and left the vault. "We're going to head out a side door where our ride will be waiting."

"Great. Everything seems to be going well so far."

"Don't jinx it," Crane deadpanned.

I didn't think the sack of money was too heavy, but I imagine that I was running on pure adrenaline. We didn't talk as we focused on our task of getting out of the bank. After walking for a bit, we finally reached the door Scarecrow wanted. Fortunately, we did not encounter any new guards or bodies, much to my relief.

Scarecrow tentatively opened up the door. I'm guessing it would have normally triggered the alarm, but the alarms had been blaring since the first cannon shot. "Grey minivan right there. You take shotgun," he commanded.

The police were not at the scene yet, so our escape was pretty easy. Scarecrow opened up the driver side rear door and I went around to the front to ride shotgun. As soon as I was in, the car took off. I hastily buckled myself in.

"Mask off, sunshine. Bank job's done," the driver said.

I took the mask off and as I did so, recognized the voice as Janet's. "I thought I recognized that snark."

"Yeah, yeah. You surprised I'm the driver? Dr. Crane doesn't have the cash to pay a driver. Although that might no longer be the case," she noted.

"You are correct. Everything went well," the Scarecrow responded.

"Great. So the yacht dream is still alive," she said. Scarecrow only chuckled darkly. "Well, good job kid. First bank heist under the belt."

"Thanks," I replied. "Still kind of processing that we just nabbed thousands of dollars."

"Right? Who says crime doesn't pay?" Janet retorted. We did not encounter any trouble and made it safely back to the Corn Palace with our spoils. I couldn't wait to count it all. Everything's more fun with lots of money!


Hey there everybody! I was finally able to find some time to pen another entry for this story in this crazy year. Thanks to all readers, reviewers, and those who favorite/follow the story! Next time, Scarecrow and Carmel will visit an A-list villain to help them with their stolen loot.

See ya real soon,

The Mustachioed Academic