I'm sorry I haven't updated recently a lot has been going on but i'm back and ready to get back on track with more frequent updates.. This chapter is short but the next one will be longer
Jace's Pov
Mason's birthday was coming up in a month my little man was gonna be six and I wanted it to be perfect this is the first time celebrating a birthday was actually special for me again, after Clary and I split it's like everything went downhill. I would always pick her up early in the morning and then we would spend the day doing random things that she wanted to do most of the time it was me watching her paint or going to the movies. After we broke up I stopped celebrating my birthday there wasn't really any point when the one person I wanted to spend the day with was gone and out of my life and it was all my fault.
I was sitting outside looking up at the dark sky when my phone rang I groaned when I seen who was calling me. "What do you want Amanda?"
"Okay I get it alright you two have a kid together but-"
"I asked you to stop talking to me. Did you get out of my house like I told you?"
"Well yeah but-"
"There is no buts I already told you I was done I can't do this anymore with you."
"Is it because of her?"
"It was over way before Clary came back into the picture, I need to make myself into a better man before I can even try and get her back."
"Come on Jace we made a good team the paparazzi loved us together."
"I have bigger things to worry about."
"Jace-"
"Don't call me again."
"Jace!"
"I'm serious I will change my number if you call again." I said and hung up I thought I would of felt bad but it felt amazing I have wanted to do that for so long but everyone kept telling me being in a serious relationship was good for my image I was just happy it was done. I got up and went back into Mason's room he was asleep and so was Clary. He hasn't been awake for very long in the past weeks he barely can talk right now and it kills me, I kissed his head and laid down letting sleep come.
"So we meet again." The same guy I had a dream about before said and sat down beside me.
"It's like a nightmare on loop…"
"Now now Herondale." He said and looked at Mason. "Do you believe in miracles?"
"Mi-miracles?"
"That's what I said right?"
"Well I guess…."
"How about god you believe in him?"
"I want to wake up…"
"He's fighting really hard-"
"Come on wake up, wake up!" I said slapping myself.
"He doesn't want to be sick anymore."
"Shut up."
"Jace-"
"Shut up!"
"JACE!" I jumped up and bumped my head into Clary's "Ouch."
"Are you okay?"
"I should be asking you that question."
"I was having a bad dream that's all…"
"Do you want to talk about it?"
"Not really…"
"Want to go get coffee?"
"Yeah I don't want to go back to sleep."
We went down to the cafeteria and got breakfast and coffee. "You sure you don't want to talk about it?"
"Positive."
"Jace-"
"Can I take you out tonight?"
"Jace-"
"It's not a date or anything like that… I feel like being in here it's suffocating me and I need to get out for a night I called Isabelle she's coming and will stay with Mason and if he needs us we can come back I just want one night."
"Where will we go?"
"Dinner, movie, and a hotel."
"A hotel?"
"To actually sleep through the night and not get up everytime he makes a noise you need this more then me." I said she looked at the ground and then back at me and gave me a small smile before nodding her head.
"Okay, if you tell me what your dreams are about?"
"Nothing…."
"This is the second time you woke up like that we all have nightmares sometimes Jace and especially being here it's-"
"I know I haven't known Mason his entire life but he's my son my flesh and blood and even though i've only known him for a while I cannot imagine my life without him and I see him fighting for his life I see a weak little boy but then I look at you and I see a mother who remembers him being strong and healthy and I want that I want to know what he's like when he's not like this and it kills me…."
"You will get to see him like that he's a Herondale and if there's one thing I know about Herondale's is that they don't give up easily."
"We should get back…."
"Yeah."
Mason's Pov
I was feeling a little better today I still couldn't stay awake for very long but when mommy and daddy told me auntie Izzy was coming I made it my own goal to stay awake because I had something I wanted to talk to her about. "How are you today Mas?" Izzy asked she was staying with me while daddy took mommy out i'm happy she's getting out of here for awhile she's been to afraid to leave because of me.
"Tired…"
"Do you want to take a nap?"
"All I do is sleep, i'm not allowed out of bed because i'm too weak right now."
"I know it must suck being in bed all day and night."
"Sometimes…" I started breathing heavily. "It doesn't….Daddy...and I play games…..and…. we make up jokes." My eyes wanted to close but I wouldn't let them.
"You know they love you so much." Izzy said kissing my head she's afraid to everyone's scared i'll die but i'm not scared anymore i'm tired.
"Do you think mommy will be okay?"
"What do you mean?"
"When I die."
"You aren't gonna die Mason."
"I don't want to die but daddy once said in an interview he did that sometimes people have to go away like his mommy and daddy went away."
"That's different Mason what happened to them it wasn't- it isn't-" She stopped talking she looked sad.
"Are my mommy and daddy in love?"
"What?"
"I want them to be in love."
"Mason."
"Mommy should be happy and I want her to be happy with daddy because that will make him happy because he loves her." My eyes were getting harder and harder to keep open.
"If it's meant to be then maybe they will be together but it's up to them."
"I think i'm gonna go to sleep now."
"Alright…"
"Don't leave me okay?" I said softly closing my eyes I don't like being alone.
"As long as you don't leave me." I heard her say softly kissing my hand.
Clary's Pov
"Thank you Jace I really did need this." I said once we finished dinner Jace had been quiet most of the night so I figured now would be the perfect time to talk.
"I think we both did before I came along did you ever get out of the hospital?"
"Mason is afraid of being alone so i've never left him I never wanted to leave him.."
"I'm sorry I was such a terrible person to you before I never wanted to hurt you and I know you may not believe me when I say that but I was moving away and I know how hard long distance relationships are and I couldn't- i'm not saying this right Clary I know I fucked up and I know if we weren't in this situation you would've never wanted to see me again."
"You're right if Mason wasn't sick I would of yelled at you the first time I seen you I would of told you that you had no right to try and be in his life when you didn't care what you did to me how much you hurt me. How could I have let you into my son's life? But all he has ever wanted was to know who his dad was and that his father loved him and when you meet him he was starting to give up you gave him hope for the future you motivated him to want to fight harder and I know if he makes it past this and goes into remission it will be another shot at life for Mason and I but do you really want it?"
"Want what?"
"A kid."
"I don't understand."
"You said that you wanted him in your life that you wanted joint custody but do you even know how to take care of a child?"
"Of course I do I use to babysit Max all the time."
"Babysitting and being a father are two completely different things Jace."
"I know they-"
"And he won't be weak all the time you'd actually have to do things with him."
"I know that."
"Do you really and I mean really want him?"
"I would give up everything for my family." He said softly and I knew what he meant.
"I'm tired…" I said he nodded and stood up holding his hand out for me.
We got to the hotel there was only one bed but Jace said I could take it and he'd sleep on the small sofa by the window he said I deserved to have a nice comfy bed. No matter how mad I was at him I couldn't change my feelings i've been in love with him since I was sixteen and even though he hurt me so badly he took my heart along with him and i've never really gotten it back. "Jace?" He turned around his expression curious.
"Yeah?"
"Come here." I said he raised his eyebrow but moved towards me anyway.
"Is everything okay?" I nodded. "Then what's wrong?" He asked he was standing in front of me I took a step closer to him and wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him towards me kissing him. "Clary." He pulled back shaking his head. "This wasn't what I wanted I just wanted to have fun today to get away from all the negative in the hospital."
"So you don't want me?"
"Of course I do! But you don't want me."
"You're all i've wanted." I said pulling him back to me.
"Clary please I won't be able to stop if you-" I pulled his shirt off and grabbed his pants by the belt loop bring him closer to the bed.
"I don't want to stop, I want you please."
So I never asked about Lemons/Smut so I just went with this... Again im sorry its taken so long to update but I will be updating soon again thanks for sticking with me!
