As she exits the room, leaving her mother and Kane to get ready for the ceremony, she's told by the guards that the Commander is waiting for her in the throne room. She smiles at the idea of being in Lexa's presence again, but the smile soon fades away when she remembers her mother's last words. No matter how hard she wants to convince herself she's not a kid anymore and she doesn't need her mother, she still cares about her opinion and she really wishes Abby could be approving and happy for her. That's the thing about her mom: always saying Clarke can talk to her, but never actually listening or understanding her daughter's words. Well, at least she can tell Lexa it worked...
"Clarke?" Lexa asks from her throne when she sees the Sky leader entering the room with tear tracks on her cheeks and a blank expression. Clarke doesn't seem to notice her presence, nor even where she is, as she's too busy worrying her mind with whatever it is that's bothering her. Worry takes over Lexa as she stands and walks towards the girl who has yet to look at her. "Clarke? Clarke, what's wrong?" Only when Lexa places a hand on Clarke's shoulder to gain her attention does the girl raise her eyes to meet with Lexa's. She's almost surprised to see her and she darts her eyes around the room as if to figure out where she is. This only makes Lexa worry even more. "Clarke, what happened? Did your mother say no?"
Clarke brings her eyes back on Lexa for a moment before closing the distance between them, embracing the other girl tightly in her arms. Lexa is dumbstruck for a moment, still not understanding the girl's strange behavior, but she soon collects herself returning the hug just as fiercely.
"My mother said yes." She mumbles in the crook of Lexa's neck after a while. "We'll become the 13th clan."
"I knew I was right to have faith in you." Lexa smiles and leans down to place a soft kiss on Clarke's hair, but her words only manage to bring more tears to the blonde's eyes. As soon as Lexa feels the wetness on the skin of her neck, her smile falters and worry overcomes her again. She gently leans back so she can meet Clarke's eyes. The blonde feels so vulnerable right now she can't even bring her gaze up to look at Lexa, even tough she knows she'd only find understanding in those beautiful green orbs. Lexa places her hands on Clarke's cheeks, wiping away the tears with her thumbs and slowly tilting the girl's head up. "Please, tell me what's wrong. Why are you crying?"
Shaking her head and chuckling lightly for the emotional mess she is, Clarke places a hand on her cheek where Lexa's still rests. "I'm sorry. It's just... It's stupid, really. Don't worry about it." She attempts a smile, but Lexa doesn't seem convinced yet.
"It's not stupid if it made you cry. You can tell me. You know I won't judge you." She strokes her thumb along the blonde's cheek to reassure Clarke even more.
"That's the thing. You don't ever judge me and you've always placed your faith in me, even when we were just two strangers to each other. You've always been reluctant to trust other people, but, for some reason, you've always trusted me. After killing Finn, I was drowning in my own guilt, until you came around and told me about Costia. You told me love was weakness and, tough I knew you were wrong, I believed you enough to put myself back together. You always know exactly what to say to make me feel better." Now Lexa's eyes are watery as well. All she wants is for Clarke to be okay and hearing her say she was able to make her feel good just makes her the happiest person in the world.
"Your mother's only ever seen the Commander side of me. Give her time. She'll come round at some point. I'll make sure she knows I'm more than just the heartless leader who abandoned your people at Mount Weather."
"You're not heartless, Lexa. You're the most caring person I've ever known. You care about each one of your people with all your heart. And, once again, you knew exactly what to say without needing me to tell you what was bothering me. My mother says I can talk to her, but she never understands what I'm saying. With you, though, I don't have to say a word for you to understand it all." This time it's Clarke's turn to wipe away Lexa's tears.
"Osir keryon ste teina, Heda. Yu laik ai alf keryon. You're my soulmate. You're like a best friend to me, but... more. You're the one person in the world who knows me better than anyone else. You make me a better person. Actually, you don't make me better, I do it myself because you inspire me. You're the one person I will carry with me forever. The only one who will ever know me, and accept me, and believe in me before anyone else does, or when no one else will." She says the last part staring straight into those wide green orbs that are looking back at her in awe. "Ai hod yu in, Leksa kom Trikru. No matter what happens, I will always love you. Nothing could ever change that." And with that she leans in and kisses Lexa with all the love she can convey.
They kiss slowly until they can no longer breathe. They part keeping their foreheads pressed together and only then does Lexa find her voice again to let Clarke know how she feels. Not that she needed to hear it anyway. She'd known Lexa loved her the moment she said "Not everyone. Not you.", but still.
"Ai hod yu in sentaim, Klark kom Skaikru."
The grins that appear on both their faces are so big they could as well light the whole city in the darkest of nights. They're both crying and laughing at the same time when they lean in to kiss again. It's quick, but it still carries all the love they feel for each other.
They'll have plenty of time for kissing later, but they need to focus on the impending ceremony. To be honest, Clarke doesn't really know what's going to happen besides the fact that she'll have to bow to Lexa.
"So about-"
"Maybe we should-"
Both girls chuckle and blush as they start talking at the same time. They stay silent for a while, not wanting to impose on the other, but then it's Clarke who takes the initiative and starts talking again.
"About tonight's ceremony... I... I don't really know what we're supposed to do. To become the 13th clan, I mean." The timid look on Clarke's face makes Lexa smile in amusement. The girl is so adorable. How can she and Wanheda be the person is beyond her understanding.
"Well... Wanheda is expected to bow to the Commander as in display of the fact that your power is now joined with mine. Then, to symbolize our union, the leader of Skaikru needs to be marked with the coalition's emblem."
"And that's gonna be either my mom or Kane. They'll never recognize me as their leader." There's that sad tone again.
"That might not be a bad thing..." At Clarke's questioning look she continues: "We need an ambassador from each clan to stay here in Polis. I was thinking... I was wondering if you'd like to be an ambassador for your clan."
"Is that your way of asking me to move in here with you, permanently?"
"Would you? Stay here in Polis with me?"
"Remember when outside Mount Weather you asked me what I wanted and I said nothing?" She pauses waiting for Lexa to let her know she remembers. "You said I should've come with you to the Capital, that Polis would've changed the way I thought about you."
"You said I already had."
Clarke's gives her a confirming nod. "I might not have been ready to be with anyone at the time, but I was already deeply, madly in love with you, Heda." She moves closer to the girl standing in front of her and she takes one of her hands in her own. After intertwining their fingers, she goes on saying: "I do know what I want now, Lexa. I want you. You are my home. There's nothing I want more than to be exactly where you are. Forever."
"Your people might not be so happy with your choice to stay here."
"Everything I did on the ground has been for my peoplale. Let me be selfish for once and do something for me. I love them, but I'm tired of fighting for their lives if I can just barely survive in the meantime. It's time we get to live too. Don't you think we've earned that?
"Maybe we have." It's barely above a whisper, but Clarke hears it loud and clear nonetheless and, this time, she is the one to close the distance and attach her lips to Lexa's.
"You sent for me?"
"Yes. Octavia has nothing to fear from me. I do trust you, Clarke."
"I know how hard that is for you."
"You think our ways are harsh, but that's how we survive."
"Maybe life should be about more than just surviving. Don't we deserve better than that?"
"Maybe we do."
Yeah. They definitely do.
Note: I hope you liked this chapter. It is definitely my favorite so far.
So, I wanted to give you a couple of references:
- For the parts in Trigedasleng, here is the translation:
Osir keryon ste teina = Our souls are intertwined
Yu laik ai alf keryon = You are my half soul ("Alf" isn't actually a word but I didn't know how to translate "half")
Ai hod yu in, Leksa kom Trikru = I love you, Lexa of the Tree People
Ai hod you in sentaim, Klark kom Skaikru = I love you too, Clarke of the Sky People
- Clarke's speech about soulmates was inspired by a Dawson's Creek scene:
"What's a soulmate?"
"It's uh… Well, it's like a best friend, but more. It's the one person in the world who knows you better than anyone else. It's someone who makes you a better person, actually, they don't make you a better person, you do that yourself because they inspire you. A soulmate is someone who you carry with you forever. It's the one person who knew you, and accepted you, and believed in you before anyone else did, or when no one else would, and no matter what happens, you will always love them. Nothing could ever change that."
Thank you so much for reading! Xxx
