Chapter 9 The Connection
Mike walked over to Will's room after El fell asleep. He knocked on the door. No answer. Mike briefly felt that familiar sense of dread. He knew that Julie was sleeping in Sarah's room. Perhaps Will was sleeping too. It occurred to Mike that there was no light coming from under the door and no sound coming from the room. Mike pushed the door open and glanced around. Enough moonlight was coming in from the outside that Mike could clearly see that Will wasn't sleeping in his bed.
He fought the urge to call out Will's name, not wanting to wake the others or alert the neighbors. Mike took a few calming breaths and flipped on the light. He glanced around trying to think of what to do. He didn't imagine Will would like it very much if he freaked out. Mike noticed a notebook and trapper keeper on Will's desk. He'd seen the trapper keeper in Will's old room in Hawkins. It was marked "The Will Byers Files." It looked considerably thicker than the last time Mike had seen it-the night Will had been freed from the Mind Flayer and El had closed the gate.
Mike felt another wave of guilt as he thought about how little he'd even visited Will after El got back. He thought of Troy's taunts and wondered what else Will had gone through that he hadn't discussed with Mike and the others- or rather what he felt he couldn't discuss with them. Mike saw that the notebook was marked "dream journal."
Mike gave into the temptation of picking it up. He didn't want to just read Will's private thoughts without his permission, but he had to understand what was going on in Will's head. He flipped through the pages of the dream journal and it did appears to be details of Will's dreams. He got to a sections wit several drawings and questions jotted in the margin as though Will was trying to figure something out.
Mike picked up the trapper keeper. It was like a scrap book. There were newspaper clippings or notes from the other party members, Jonathan, Mrs. Byers, Hopper, Mr. Clarke and several other people. Mike came across a copy of "The Boy Who Came Back to Life" article. Someone had drawn Xs over Will's eyes and written "Zombie Boy" in marker. The clipping looked like it had been crumpled and flattened. The words "Private, Keep Out" were written on the page with the clipping, but Mike started to flip through the pages. Will had written that he was keeping the "files" to try to determine what was real and what was just in his head. Mike came to a post it note he'd written to Will shortly after El had closed the gate. 'Whenever you get that View-Master feeling, and you feel stuck between the slides...Remember, you're not alone. Crazy together-Mike."
Mike remembered the argument he had with Will as he recovered from the concussion. Will had told him that he had tried to talk to him about things. Mike remembered the pain on Will's face very clearly.
Mike flipped forward to a page marked July 1, 1985. He saw a lot of words, but the word "STUPID" was repeated several times. Mike remembered that night very clearly. He remembered Will riding his bike into the pouring rain. He remembered panicking with Lucas as the two of them were chasing after Will. Mike recalled their panic increasing as they found the Byers home empty. He remembered him and Lucas finding Will next to a destroyed Castle Byers-not knowing how it had been destroyed.
The pages where the word "stupid" was written excessively among several other words and sentences looked like they had been wet at some point as there were several smudges over works like arcade and D&D. Will must have written them when he was alone in his room after taking a shower. Mike remembered Will being in there for a really long time. He and Lucas had knocked several times on the door to ask Will if he was alright. Will had irritably answered that he was fine and just needed a little time. He must have been writing "STUPID" over and over again to vent and get it out of his system because he certainly hadn't been interested in hearing their apologies. Will seemed to have lost all interest in any sort of apologies from his friends from that day forward; either shrugging them off with obvious pain in his voice or outright losing his temper.
Mike slammed the trapper keeper shut as he suddenly realized that going through Will's personal things was breaking the trust that he was so desperately trying to get back. There were tears in his eyes. He decided to go downstairs to look for Will. When he did, he saw that the back porch light was on. Mike opened the back door and saw Will perched on the railing of the porch watching his dog running around the back yard. He was also smoking a cigarette.
"You smoke now?" Mike blurted out before he could stop himself.
Will glanced over at Mike stoically and shrugged. "This is my first cigarette," Will answered matter-of-factly. "I thought it might help me relax."
"You should find something else," said Mike. "I heard those things cause cancer. I'm pretty sure you've heard that too."
Will scoffed. "What does it matter?"
"It matters because you're going to have a kid that is going to need you," said Mike. "You've got a sister who needs you. And it matters to me because you're my best friend!" Mike reached to snatch the cigarette from Will, causing his friend to pull back, lose his balance and nearly fall off the railing. Mike managed to grab Will's arm and prevent the fall. He pulled Will safely on to the main part of the porch.
Will angrily pulled out of Mike's grasp, walked to the edge of the porch and took another puff of the cigarette then slowly exhaled a stream of smoke. Mike found a small comfort in the fact that as guarded Will had become with him, he never denied being Mike's best friend.
"Look, I'm not trying to tell you what to do, Will. But we're in this together now- whatever Brenner is planning-we're in it together. Could you please not start smoking?"
Will sighed. "I'm just going to finish this one and I'll stop."
"Promise?"
"Yeah, I promise." Will took another puff off the cigarette and slowly exhaled before he started to cough. Mike reached over and started patting him on the back, but Will quickly stepped out of his reach. "I'm fine!"
"You're not fine, Will," said Mike. "You haven't been fine for a long time. You're still stuck between two slides."
"What would you know about that, Mike?"
"Because I saw the files, Will. I saw the files you keep to help yourself remember what's real."
"Did you see the words 'Keep Out' on them?"
"I did and I'm sorry that I kept reading, Will. I just had to know what's going on with you. I mean, you didn't even talk to me about Troy's bullying the last few months of eighth grade. Why didn't you tell me how bad it was getting?"
"Don't ask me why I wasn't talking to you about things, Mike. I already told you why. "
"Yeah. I wish I could go back in time and change things. I want things to be the way they were with us."
"Well I don't," said Will.
"Why not?"
"I told you why not at New Years: I was an unequal member of the party. It was just pathetic."
"I hate that we made you feel that way. I hate that I made you feel like you couldn't come to me anymore. I hate the fact that you can't stand doing the things that we loved as kids. Most of all, I hate the fact that I caused you to hate those things."
Will's expression softened. Mike saw some of the gentleness Will always had when he was younger. His expression hardened again and looked almost defiant as he looked past Mike. Mike heard the back door open behind him. He turned around to see Hopper and Mrs. Byers.
"What are you doing with that cigarette, kid?" asked Hopper.
"Trying to relax," said Will as he took another puff and glared at Hopper defiantly. This confused Mike as Will had always gotten along well with Hopper.
"You need to find another way to relax," said Hopper.
"I will if you will," said Will. He glanced at his mother who looked anxiously between Will and Hopper. "Both of you."
"It's different for us," said Hopper sternly. We're the adults."
"As adults, you should know better and set a better example," said Will. "I'm just an impressionable kid after all."
Mike started to feel a little nervous for Will. He'd seen what happened when someone became defiant of Hopper. He then noticed that Hopper actually looked a little nervous.
"Fine, we'll both stop."
"Good," said Will. He dropped the cigarette and crushed it with his foot.
"Now, you wanna tell us what Mike is doing here on a school night?"
Will stepped in front of Mike protectively. "El and I asked him to come."
"Why? What happened?" asked Joyce.
Will's defiantly stoic facade dropped. "He got to us when we went back to Hawkins at New Years. He got to all of us."
"Who did, Sweetie?" asked Joyce ask she walked over to Will and pulled him into a hug. "What do you mean?"
Will hugged his mother back. "Brenner. He got someone to drug us and Mike and El...I...now Julie's dragged into this whole thing too."
"Julie?" asked Hopper. "Anne and Dennis Mason's daughter?"
"Yeah," said Will.
"But why?" asked Hopper.
"I guess since he no longer had you as a prisoner, he decided to skip right to using El and I for that particular purpose," said Will.
"What purpose?" asked Joyce as she glanced between Will and Hopper.
"Are you telling me that El and Julie are both-" Hopper started to ask. Mike started to feel very nervous. Hopper was never thrilled about them making out and El being pregnant was a much bigger deal. Will disentangled himself from his mother and stood between Hopper and Mike again.
"Yeah, they are. Brenner got someone to drug us all at the New Years party. I guess he decided to do it while Sarah and Alice weren't around," said Will. "We have two more lives to protect."
"I'm not going to strangle Mike, kid," said Hopper to Will. Joyce's eyes widened as she realized what Will and Hopper were talking about.
"That son of a bitch! I'm going to strangle him!"
"Joyce, calm down," said Hopper as he glanced to one side of the back yard, then the other.
"Calm down?" asked Joyce incredulously. "HE VIOLATED MY CHILDREN, HOP! He's been violating them their whole lives and he keeps doing it!"
"I know that, Joyce. I know," said Hopper. "Let's talk about this inside, we don't need the neighbors hearing about this."
"Fine!" said Joyce. She gestured for Mike and Will to follow her inside. Mike tugged Will's sleeve.
"What's going on with you and Hopper, Will," he whispered.
"Never mind," said Will hastily. He didn't want Mike angry with Hopper anymore than he wanted Hopper angry with Mike. As angry as Will was with Hopper after he found out that Hopper had told Brenner where El was so they could save Will, he didn't hate him.
El, Julie, Sarah, and Alice were at the top of the when they went inside. El came down the stairs and hugged Joyce.
"Oh, my sweet girl," Joyce exclaimed. "Are you alright?"
"I'm okay," said El tearfully. Julie walked over to Will and took his hand. He gave hers a reassuring squeeze.
"Do your parents know you're here?" Hopper asked Julie. "Do they know that Will's the father?"
Julie shook her hear. "No."
"We need to call them and let them know you're okay."
"What? No! They wanted me to give up the baby and Sarah said that the couple works for that mad scientist guy. I told them I had a bad feeling, but they won't listen!"
"We'll keep you and the baby safe, Julie," said Hopper. "But we have to let your parents know where you are or things could get a lot worse for everyone."
"What if they try to force me to go back to Hawkins?" asked Julie.
"We won't let that happen," said Joyce as she held El.
"Brenner and his people are going to try all kinds of things," said Will. "Who knows what he'll do next? He's always trying to control us and everyone else..." Will's eyes widened. "El, Sarah, come with me. I need to show you something."
"Will, what-" Joyce began.
"I have something I need to figure out, Mom," said Will. "Give us a couple minutes."
Mike started to follow, but Will held up his hand. "Sorry, Mike, I need to talk to them alone." El and Sarah followed him to his room. Mike imagined that Max would have gotten a good laugh out of that moment. He did feel a sense of loss that he wasn't in on whatever secret they were discussing.
Will walked over to his desk and picked up his dream journal when he entered his bedroom with his twin sister and his step sister.
"Will, what is it?" asked El.
Will held up a finger then started flipping through his dream journal. He had made detailed sketches next to the descriptions of what El had seen in his mind. There were pictures of the demogorgan, the Mind Flayer and Papa. "When-when I saw your memories of Brenner hurting you and making you do things you didn't want to do... the feelings were exactly the same as when the Mind Flayer was making me do things I didn't want to do... how it hurt me when I resisted."
"Yes," said El tearfully. "I felt the same when I saw your memories about the Mind Flayer."
"And that first Demogorgan... It was fully grown. It had you powers...when it unlocked the door at the old house from the outside the night it took me. It was the exact same way you opened the latch the night you closed the gate. And it could make portals after it touched me. We both disappeared to the upside down when it touched me in the shed."
"What are you thinking, Will?" asked Sarah.
"The demogorgans were the Mind Flayer's army. The way it tries to force people to do things feels the same way as it does when Brenner tries to force people to do things. What is the Mind Flayer is an extension of him somehow? What if that's why he wants to open the gate again? You saw our memories, Sarah. What do you think?"
"Give me that dream journal," said Sarah. Will handed it too her. She sat on the floor, closed her eyes and concentrated. She took a deep breath and opened her eyes. "You're right."
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A couple hours later, Mike listened as Will tossed and turned in his bed.
"Can't sleep?" asked Mike.
"Sorry," said Will. "I'll try to be more quiet."
Mike got up and flipped on the light. "It's alright, I can't sleep either."
Will looked up at Mike blankly for a moment before grabbing his sketch pad and starting to draw. Mike sighed and sat back on the cot. "You really aren't going to talk about it?"
"Talk about what, Mike? The fact that El and I are never safe? The fact that he's always trying to get us and he won't stop until he has us all under his control? The fact that El can find him and she's frozen with terror if she tries? The fact that she feels guilty about it even though it isn't her fault?"
"It's not your fault either, Will," said Mike.
"I feel like it is," said Will. "I feel like it's all my fault. If I had fought harder... If I'd been smarter that day... she would have never... we could have... it's because of me that she..never mind."
"Why on Earth do you feel like any of this is your fault, Will? It was Brenner, it was all Brenner."
"There are things that you don't know, and you'd hate me if you did know them." Will tossed his sketch pad to the side, stood up and headed to the door. Mike grabbed his arm.
"I could never hate you, Will. Ever!" Will pulled his arm free. "Will, wait, please!"
"I just need s few minutes alone," said Will. "Please don't follow me." Mike sighed and nodded.
Will thought about what Mike might do if he found out that Hopper had told Brenner where El was so he could go into the Upside Down to save Will. Hopper had told El the truth shortly after taking her to his cabin and she had forgiven him. Will himself couldn't forgive Hopper no matter how much El begged him to do so. Will couldn't forgive himself either, even though El had begged him to do that as well. El still blamed herself for Will's feelings of isolation from his friends and family, despite Will always telling her not to blame herself.
His mother was on the back porch biting her nails. At least she wasn't smoking. Will's little stunt from earlier that night seemed to have worked.
"Mom," said Will as he opened the back door. She turned around and gave him a small smile.
"Couldn't sleep, Baby?" Will shrugged.
"Just thinking about how Brenner is trying to reconnect with an extension of his own Mind in a dark dimension and he's after El and I. Now he's going to be after two innocent babies as well."
"He's not going to get any of you," said Joyce as she walked over and gently cupped Will's face in her hands.
Will reached up and took her hands in his. "It was one thing when El and I just had to protect ourselves. We have other kids like us helping us. But there's this baby that I haven't even met yet and I don't want anything to happen to him or her. I can't relax or focus."
Joyce smiled sadly. "Now you understand how I feel all the time."
"I just want it to be over, Mom: once and for all."
"Me too," said Joyce. She wanted to assure her son that it would be over soon, but had a hard time believing it. Brenner and the people he was working with were ruthless and had spies everywhere. The fact that he had used her children in some sort of twisted breeding program made her feel less safe than ever.
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Mike sat with El in the kitchen as Julie argued with her parents in the living room. He had called his house and left a message that he'd gone to see El, but didn't say why yet. He dreaded telling his parents, but was glad that they weren't there at the same as time the Masons.
"I'm not going back with you," said Julie to her parents. If you try to force me, I'll just run away somewhere else!"
"Julie, we just don't want to you sacrifice your future," said Mrs. Mason.
"Will," Mr. Mason implored. "You had a reputation of being a model student when you lived in Hawkins. You've got a bright future. Surely you can see that this is for the best?"
El was silent and leaned her head on Mike's shoulder as they listened for Will's answer. It took a minute for him to finally speak.
"My own father constantly made it clear that I wasn't wanted. It felt horrible. I don't ever want any kid of mine to feel that way."
El started to cry and Mike pulled her closer.
"Oh, sweetie," Mike and El heard Mrs. Byers saying, Mike figured she was hugging Will. "I should have kicked your father out before you were born. I wanted to, but I wasn't strong enough.
"It wasn't your fault, Mom," said Will. "You're the strongest person I know. You always made me feel loved."
Mike knew that was true. Even though Mrs. Byers always had to work long hours when they were little, she knew what was going on with Will. Mike's own mother, who never had a job, knew very little about what was going on with him and Nancy. He wondered if his parents would even know he was gone if he hadn't taken the car.
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