A/N: Hi! Thanks for all the support of this fic.
Third Year - Part Four
Going into her third year at Hogwarts, Hermione knew that she was going to have an astonishing secret: Professor McGonagall had explained before the summer holidays that the only way she would be able to attend all of her desired classes was through unusual means. She didn't like keeping the time-turner a secret from Harry and Ron but she had promised the Deputy Headmistress that she wouldn't tell them, and Hermione wasn't going to forsake that solemn vow and let down her Head of House.
She was roughly at the halfway point of Third Year and she had unexpectedly accumulated two more startling secrets. Her realisation that Professor Lupin was a werewolf had clicked into place in her mind so suddenly when performing her homework on the creatures, that she had gasped. After confirming that the DADA professor's illnesses always took place during the full moon and that Professor Lupin's boggart was, in fact, the full moon and not a crystal ball like everyone had assumed, the secret gnawed away at Hermione's stomach. She severely debated telling someone - perhaps a member of staff - but then she realised that Professor Dumbledore surely already knew and apparently he trusted that it was safe for Professor Lupin to teach them. Hermione watched her Defence professor closely for the next few weeks and she could find no fault in his character nor (possibly more importantly in her opinion) in his ability to teach his subject, and so she decided to keep Professor Lupin's secret to herself. She just hoped that she would have no reason to regret that decision.
Her third secret wasn't really as astonishing as possessing a device that could turn back time or a werewolf for a teacher, but it was surprising in its own way: there were two members of Slytherin House that she could almost describe as being her 'friend'.
Hermione found Tam Davies so unlike every other Slytherin she'd ever seen that, in truth, it was more the age difference and his overall popularity that made their developing friendship so unlikely. Tam had laughed when she'd made an offhand comment about how unsuited he was to his house. "I might not extol the virtues of pureblood supremacy but I'm no less cunning or ambitious, Granger," he told her with a trace of a smirk that was more befitting of those of his house. "My sole focus is earning a spot at a major magical dance company when I graduate from Hogwarts, and I'm not about to let anything stand in my way." He shook his head ruefully. "It's a shame that my house has such a dark history because it completely overshadows the positive characteristics of Slytherins - yes, Granger, there are good things about us," he added with a faux sneer at the sceptical look on her face. He pondered her for a moment. "You know, while you are obviously a Gryffindor," he said with a slight roll of his eyes, "I reckon there are a few Slytherin traits within you too."
Hermione scoffed at that. "Really?" she asked disbelievingly.
"You're determined, aren't you?" Tam explained.
Hermione considered it. "To a point," she allowed after a few moments of reflection. She was determined but she wasn't as interested in self-preservation as Slytherins were.
"And don't tell me you're not ambitious with all the studying you do," he added. "It brought you to me, didn't it: showing a willingness to form alliances to get where you want to go."
"In Gryffindor we call those friendships," Hermione answered wryly. "And you were the one that approached me first, remember? I still don't see what you get out of helping me."
Tam let out a slight laugh and held up a hand. "Ease back on your suspicions, Granger, I have no sinister or manipulative plans for you. I already told you that I want to spend my time on dance in whatever form it takes. I don't particularly seek anything in return for my coaching so perhaps this is more like a friendship than a traditional Slytherin alliance."
While there might be a tentative label of friendship with Tam, Hermione was less sure where she stood with Nott. He was only marginally more talkative than he had been before their first private rehearsal together a couple of weeks ago, which meant that Hermione was having to observe him very closely in an attempt to figure out his thoughts and motivation. She was extremely keen to ask him questions because he had undoubtedly been through some sort of personal change of attitude to be dancing with and touching her, but she forced herself not to pry because she didn't want to scare him away with her intense inquisitiveness.
She hadn't wanted to give him a chance when Tam had suggested Nott rehearse with them, and she would have refused had he not approached her beforehand with a baffling, but seemingly genuine, desire to find out about muggles. Hermione was incredibly apprehensive at the start of the rehearsal because she'd had too many experiences of the Slytherins in her year being deeply unpleasant towards her. Nott had never actually said anything to her in the past but he had laughed along with all of Malfoy and Parkinson's comments, and the expression on his face had clearly shown that he thought she was far beneath him. And, although his attitude had clearly changed once he'd walked in on her practice with Tam, she couldn't shake off the feeling (however ridiculous) that Nott was going to hurt her in some way.
She spent the first half of their practice trying to ignore Nott's presence but that wasn't particularly easy with Tam giving Nott most of his attention, but Davies had never seen his fellow Slytherin dance before and Hermione tried to tune out the sound of his voice whenever he complimented Nott's ability. Hermione already knew that Nott was good because she heard the praise every week from the Vittozzis and she'd discreetly sneaked a few glances his way during classes when he'd started acting differently towards her, but hearing Tam praise him made her feel even more on edge.
When the time came for them to practise the paired dances, Hermione's heart was beating far more quickly in her chest than she would like as her anxiety levels rose, but she tried to portray that she was calm. However, seeing that Nott looked almost as tense and apprehensive as she felt helped her to give the Slytherin a chance. Her heart leapt up to her mouth when he reacted so quickly to her touch, but he seemed genuine in saying that the warmth of her hand took him by surprise. She'd glanced away from him and she saw that Tam was watching them closely in the mirror. Tam gave the slightest inclination of his head in Nott's direction and Hermione understood what he was trying to tell her. Tam believed Nott's change of heart was genuine. If that was true, Hermione could see how this was a very significant moment for Nott and she felt guilty for being unwilling to allow him a chance to redeem himself for his previous behaviour.
The first dance was awkward and stilted but when Tam moved them on to faster, more intricate dances, Hermione soon found the dance steps flowing more smoothly between them and she soon forgot that she had been nervous of dancing with Nott at all. He was much more competent than Neville and she found she didn't have to stretch as much as she did to accommodate Tam's superior height. There were a few niggles in each dance that they had to work on but by the end of the rehearsal, Hermione felt that she'd performed those paired dances better than she ever had before. She didn't know Nott well enough to state confidently how he felt about their practice and his face didn't alter much from its typical guarded or haughty expression, but there were moments in the polka and bourrée when he'd caught her eye and those serious orbs were suddenly bright and more expressive than she'd ever witnessed before. It had almost thrown her off balance. However, the reserved air was quickly back in place straight after and, if it hadn't happened more than once, she would have thought she'd imagined it.
Outside of their private rehearsing, Nott completely ignored her. Hermione didn't mind. She was far too busy attending her many classes and completing all her homework; she didn't have time for any drama that was caused by her 'alliance' with a Slytherin. She could also appreciate that while Tam's level of popularity could handle an association with her, Nott would face a huge amount of criticism from his house for willingly dancing with her. She doubted that the opinions of the Gryffindors would be much more favourable but she could hardly blame them if that turned out to be the case because she had been just as judgemental when presented with Nott's altered behaviour. Harry and Ron still weren't speaking to her and she could only imagine how badly they'd react to her spending time with Slytherins. She might have been willing to give Tam and Nott a chance but she doubted that Harry would, and Ron certainly wouldn't. So, although it gave her a small thrill to know that she had two secret almost-friends, if she actually allowed herself any time away from her workload to think on it, it just reminded her how isolated she really was. Luckily, her busy schedule didn't really leave any time for socialising and, if she were honest with herself, she could barely spare the time for her weekly extra sessions with Tam and Nott. However, during that hour a week she could forget about the extra strains in her life (no huge piles of homework, no friends that had shunned her, no escaped convicts trying to kill her best friend, no Signora belittling her efforts, no Neville to have to compensate for) and she could just enjoy dancing with people who were like-minded. It was a small sanctuary for her.
"Signor has suggested that I teach you the Highland reel," Tam told them at their next practice. He looked eager but a quick glance at Nott told Hermione that he was as nonplussed about the reel as she was. "It's not really taught any more because if the dancers aren't in good enough shape then it looks awful - it's very physically demanding," Tam explained. "You two both got to the end of the jumps sequence in your first class so Signor reckons you've got the stamina." Hermione opened her mouth to ask a question but Tam held his hand up to stop her. "The examiners don't ever ask to see it but the Vittozzis can put you forward to show it to them if you're good enough. It can get you a few bonus marks so it's worth trying."
Hermione nodded, convinced by Tam's justification for the added effort it would take to learn an extra dance even though she was particularly exhausted that day. Tam tried to move around which day of the week their practice was on because both she and Nott still preferred for it to be a secret from the other students, and she had already done two extra hours that day with her time-turner and stayed up late the previous night to finish her homework on time. She also strongly suspected that she had the beginnings of a cold because her limbs ached more than normal, her throat was a little dry and her sinuses throbbed painfully whenever she bent her head forwards. The prospect of learning a supposedly-physical new dance worried her a little but she hoped that Tam had been over-exaggerating its difficulty.
He had not.
The reel seemed to consist almost exclusively of leaps and springs from foot to foot that very quickly sapped away at Hermione's energy and left her legs burning. The only respite came when Hermione and Nott laid their arms forwards across each other's waist and turned around each other for a few counts.
"OK, that's the first part," Tam told them as they sucked in huge lungfuls of air, Hermione bent double as she lethargically massaged the backs of her calves.
"How much more is there?" gasped Nott, wiping a hand across his brow.
"There are eight parts in total," Tam admitted and Hermione let out a strangled gasp as she looked up at him dismay.
"Eight?" she repeated.
"I told you it was a hard dance," Tam replied with only a hint of sympathy. "You haven't even covered thirty seconds of the choreography yet."
Hermione stared at him in disbelief as exhaustion and despair bubbled up inside her. She held a hand up to cover her eyes as tears started to sting and blur her vision. She couldn't bear for either of the Slytherins to see her moment of weakness and she forced herself to calm down - becoming emotional was only going to make her more tired anyway.
The second part of the reel was just as brutal as the first but contained slightly more intricate footwork that Hermione struggled to get right. Not only that but her arms sooned matched the aching of her legs after prolonged periods of holding them high above her head.
"You're doing really well," Tam told them encouragingly. "I said it's a killer, didn't I? Let's try it with the music a couple of times and then we'll call it a day." Hermione tried not to look too relieved at his words and a picture of all the work she still had to complete loomed in the back of her mind. She attempted to push it away, not wanting it to intrude on her precious dance time.
They soon found that the music was a fair bit faster than they had been rehearsing to and they struggled to keep the jumps and springs in time. Hermione realised a split second after it happened that she had turned to face the wrong diagonal but it was too late to stop Nott's toes making sharp contact with the top of her foot as he kicked it out like the jump dictated him to. Hermione gasped at the impact and wrapped her hand around her injured foot to try and contain the pain as she attempted to balance on one leg.
The music stopped abruptly and Hermione squeezed her eyes shut, highly embarrassed by her mistake and reluctant to look at either of the Slytherins in her humiliation. A hand reached out to steady her and she heard Tam ask, "How bad is it, Granger?"
She grimaced and then concentrated on keeping any wobbles out of her voice. "It hurts but I don't think it's broken."
"I'll run a diagnostic spell just to make sure," Tam replied. Hermione cracked open her eyes and watched him move her fingers off her foot before tapping the injured area three times and muttering an incantation under his breath. Her skin glowed brown for a moment and then faded. "You're right - no break," he confirmed, "but it'll bruise badly. There's always some salve in the store cupboard. I'll go grab some. Hang on."
Tam gave her a reassuring tap on her calf and then walked out of the room. Through the pain, Hermione suddenly became aware that she had her arm wrapped over the back of Nott's neck to steady herself and his hand was on her lower back. Even though they had now danced closely together a few times, it felt very intimate. In her attempt to put distance between them, she lost her balance and would've landed rather inelegantly on her bottom had Nott's hands not caught her. He lowered her gently to the ground, even more humiliated and still wanting to cry as her cheeks flamed red. She buried her face in her hands but then became aware of him sitting next to her.
"I'm sorry," he said quietly, making her look over at him in surprise.
"Don't be ridiculous - I'm the one that turned the wrong way," she pointed out. "It's my fault I got hurt, not yours."
His lips twitched sideways as he briefly showed a troubled expression. "No, not about that - although I still feel bad for hurting you - but I was apologising for…" He struggled to find the words and then motioned his hand over his shoulder. "...For the past, I suppose." At Hermione's confused expression he explained, "Before, you apologised for judging me even though a few weeks ago your assessment would have been truthful. The view I had of you and those like you, however, was inaccurate for years. I'm sorry that I judged you."
Hermione tried not to gape at him, more than a little shocked how the world had turned on its head: her two best friends were no longer speaking to her and here she was, sat on the floor, with a Slytherin who was making a mature apology the likes of which she wasn't sure Ron nor Harry were even capable of. To her shame, it all became too much and tears fell from her eyes before she could stop them. A sob escaped her chest, immediately followed by another, as all the exhaustion, stress and pain bubbled up from where she'd been repressing it.
Nott looked almost comically terrified at her reaction. "Granger, I didn't - I don't - I…"
Hermione shook her head and waved her hand at him. "It's not you," she reassured him, her voice thick with emotion. "It's a lot of things." He didn't look at all reassured.
"Can I get you anything?" he asked tightly.
Hermione wiped her eyes, her breaths still hitching unevenly in her throat. "My bag - there's a handkerchief in it."
Nott looked only too pleased to be given a reason to move away from her and he hurried over to where she'd placed her belongings. He returned at once, carefully depositing her bag in front of her. Desperate as she was to compose herself, Hermione sorted through the contents of her bag agitatedly and snatched the handkerchief out. In her haste, she failed to notice that something else had been partly dislodged from the bag until she had momentarily lowered the soft blue cotton from her eyes in order to blow her nose. The sight of the time-turner dangling over the side of her satchel caused her heart to momentarily freeze in alarm, but then, even more worryingly, she saw that Nott's attention had been caught by the device and his fingers were reaching out to touch it.
"No!" she said sharply. Nott looked over at her, evidently surprised by her tone, but his fingers stayed merely resting against the hourglass. "It- it used to belong to my grandmother," she lied quickly. "It's very delicate."
Nott held her gaze for a few moments. She tried not to squirm at the intensity of it but she could feel her cheeks flooding with colour once again. Could he tell she was lying? Probably. She'd never been all that good at it and she knew that neither her lie nor the execution of it had been very convincing.
Nott's eyes dropped back to the time-turner and he gently lifted his fingers away from the device. "Forgive me," he apologised politely, but his eyes were fixed on the talisman.
Thankfully, the sound of the door opening broke Nott's concentration as he glanced over to where Tam was jogging in with a glass jar clutched in his hand. With Nott looking elsewhere, Hermione took the opportunity to carefully tuck the time-turner out of sight again.
Hermione looked down at the chapter she'd been asked to study for her arithmancy homework and fought very hard to resist the urge to burst into tears. This couldn't be the next part of their course, surely? The formulas involved were far beyond what they had covered so far. She looked down at the note she'd made on her parchment of the page number she needed to read from, and checked that it matched with the book. It did. Her heart sank and a tear slipped from her eyes as an increasingly familiar sense of being overwhelmed threatened to swallow her up.
She sniffed loudly and brushed the tear away. There were still a few minutes until the library would close. If she was lucky, she'd find someone from her arithmancy class between the shelves so she could check that she had copied down the correct page number and she therefore wouldn't waste her time reading and trying to understand something she didn't have to. She didn't have arithmancy tomorrow but she'd have little time in the evening to complete her homework when she had ballet class and other work to do too. She quickly tidied her belongings away and held the books that didn't fit into her bag against her chest as she glanced around for any familiar faces from arithmancy.
Unfortunately, row after row proved disappointing. The library was normally full of the Ravenclaws from her year but it was typical that when she needed to talk to one of them there wouldn't be any in sight. Another tear escaped and quickly trickled down her cheek. With a feeling of inevitable disappointment, she tried the tables at the rear of the library and came across a familiar head of dark hair.
"Nott," she whispered eagerly and hurried over to him. He glanced up at her with an expression of faint surprise and put down his quill as she approached. She could see him taking in her dishevelled appearance but she was too relieved to have found a fellow arithmancy student to care about how scruffy she looked. "Can you remember what page number Professor Vector wanted us to read from? The figure I copied down takes me near the end of the book and I'm sure she can't possibly want us to study the material back there yet." Her voice sounded a little hysterical and she cleared her throat in an attempt to get herself back under control. It had been just over a week since she'd broken down in front of him in their ballet session and she had no intention of repeating that embarrassing experience.
Nott reached for a sheet of parchment under the one he was working on. "Page two hundred and seventy-eight," he told her and Hermione's shoulders sagged in relief.
"I had seven hundred and seventy-eight," she explained, depositing the books in her hands on the table so she could retrieve the arithmancy tome from within her bag. She flicked through the pages until she came to the right section and then skimmed through it. It was longer than she'd hoped for but at least she should be able to understand it. With a sigh, she attempted to stuff the book back into her satchel a little too forcefully and the weight from her shoulder suddenly disappeared as her bag split open and the contents spilled onto the floor. Letting loose a soft cry of despair, Hermione ducked down to rectify the damage that had been done to her possessions. The first few books she picked up were fine but she soon saw that one of her ink pots had smashed, soaking the parchment closest to it and staining a few pages in a couple of her set texts. "Oh no," she moaned wearily, unable to believe her misfortune.
"Here, allow me," she heard Nott say and an ink-splattered book was suddenly plucked out of her hand.
"Thank you," she murmured, ducking her head to discreetly wipe away the tears that once again threatened to fall. "I, er, think there's a charm that we could use that removes liquids but I don't remember what it is," she told him, her voice shaking with repressed emotion.
"Tergeo," Nott told her and then demonstrated the charm, siphoning off the wet ink from the pages of her transfiguration textbook.
"Oh," she said, momentarily distracted by the sight of the new spell at work. "Will that work on my homework too?" she asked, glancing down to the ink-drenched parchment that she'd intended on handing in during tomorrow's Ancient Runes lesson.
"It'll take off the wet ink but it might take some of the dry too," he replied, watching her a little warily.
Hermione sighed and nodded. "Could you have a go for me? I'll have to rewrite it anyway but the more I can see the easier it'll be."
"Here," Nott said, pointing his wand at the wet pieces of parchment and repeating the incantation. The glistening black ink disappeared quickly and, as far as Hermione could see, only a few of her written words were erased along with it. "I can teach you if you want," Nott offered after Hermione thanked him. "There's no wand action involved but the pronunciation needs to be precise."
She managed to remove a large ink stain from the floor on her third attempt and then promptly sneezed four times in a row, each one becoming louder and higher in pitch.
Nott frowned at her as she retrieved a clean tissue from her pocket "I see you're still unwell. Did you not take a remedy from Madam Pomfrey?"
"I did," Hermione replied, stuffing the tissue deep into her pocket again. "I took three. I'm not sure if this is a new cold or just the same one lingering on."
Nott was still looking at her with a disapproving expression. "I'm not particularly surprised. You need to give yourself a break - you work too hard."
Hermione forced herself to smile weakly. "I'm fine," she told him. "Everyone gets a little run down this time of year."
"But when they take something like Pepper-Up potion they get better," Nott pointed out. "If you don't start taking better care of yourself, you're going to crack."
Hermione shook her head, a little bemused to even be having this conversation with the Slytherin. "I've got too much to do, I haven't got time to relax."
Nott's eyes dropped temporarily to her neck. "Actually, I'd say time is something you do have."
Hermione stared at him, frozen in place by the meaning behind his words. "I don't know what you mean," she said eventually in a forcefully confused voice as she averted her attention to repairing her split bag.
"I was referring to your time-turner," Nott replied calmly.
Hermione accidentally burnt a hole in her bag at the abruptness of his words and she quickly looked around in case anyone had overheard. Fortunately, they were completely alone.
"I - " she began, rapidly trying to think of some plausible excuse but Nott interrupted.
"Don't bother trying to deny it, Granger. I didn't know what it was when I saw it but I knew by the runes that it didn't come from your muggle family. It took a little bit of research but I know what I saw now," Nott stated but Hermione was still scrambling to rectify the situation. He must have noticed the panic on her face because he said, "Look, I'm not going to tell anyone. I wasn't going to say anything to you but you appear to be stubbornly ignoring the negative effect it's having on your health."
"I'm fine," she insisted hotly. "It's just a persistent cold."
"It doesn't take a genius to figure out that you're using the time-turner to take more classes so, not only are you actually living longer days by repeating those hours again to attend the lessons, you have much more homework than everyone else and no extra time to complete it all."
"I manage," she said tightly but she could feel her emotions rising upwards again.
"The very fact that you haven't responded to the remedies shows that your body is telling you otherwise," Nott argued. "Something needs to change - even if it's just redoing part of your Saturday afternoon so you can go and sleep in your dormitory once in a while."
Hermione gaped at him. "I-I couldn't possibly!" she spluttered. "It's not a toy, Nott. I'm to use it for my studies only."
"Well, your studies seem to have driven you to the brink of a breakdown," he said calmly. "If you're not going to take some hours for yourself then I recommend you drop something before you really do crack from the exhaustion."
Hermione was so shocked by his line of thinking that she actually leaned away from him. "Drop something?" she repeated, sounding almost scandalised. "I can't just drop one of my subjects."
"If you're taking every elective there is, then of course you can," Nott replied and then narrowed his eyes. "You're not taking all of them, are you?" Hermione pursed her lips together and Nott's eyebrows nearly disappeared into his hairline. "Granger, why, in Salazar's name, are you taking Muggle Studies?!"
Hermione's cheeks flushed at his disbelieving tone. "It's very interesting to hear about them from a magical perspective. It gives me an insight into the viewpoint of witches and wizards from a purely magical background."
Nott didn't look convinced. "It's a waste of your time and energy, Granger."
"No, what would be a waste is me quitting now when I've put the time and effort in for half a year," she argued. "I can't just walk away with nothing."
"What about your other subjects: do you enjoy all of them?" he questioned.
"I - " she began and then balked.
He noticed at once. "Which one don't you like - Care of Magical Creatures?"
"I would never drop Care of Magical Creatures," she vowed passionately.
"Why? It's terrible. After Draco nearly got killed, we spent an entire term tending to flobberworms, Granger. I've barely learnt a thing in that class that I couldn't have just read in a book," Nott declared, suddenly sounding more like a Slytherin than she'd ever heard before - not that he'd spoken to her very much until now.
"Professor Hagrid is my friend," she told him coldly.
He watched her carefully for a moment and then said, "That doesn't qualify him as being a competent teacher." Hermione balled her hands up into fists, too worked up to feel anything but a heartfelt defence of Hagrid. Nott seemed to notice though because he continued, "So I guess you aren't fond of Divination."
Hermione simply made a noncommittal noise in her throat and shrugged her shoulders. "It all seems very imprecise to me," she replied diplomatically.
"From what I've heard, you either have the gift for Divination or you don't," Nott told her. "And if you don't then there's not much point studying it, is there?"
Hermione set her jaw stubbornly. "I'm not a quitter."
Nott's eyes narrowed on her once again but she refused to look away. "No. I suspect that's the Gryffindor in you."
She could tell that he thought that she was being ridiculous and the possibility that he might be right, that she was making emotional decisions instead of rational ones, was something she refused to consider in case it made her even more upset.
"Well, you know what I think your two options are," he told her, handing back the book he'd been holding onto for no apparent reason. "Either you free up your school schedule or you find a way to give yourself more time to catch up on some rest, and until you make a choice, I won't be taking part in an extra dance session with you and Davies. I don't see the benefit for either of us in rehearsing with you in your current state." He muttered a charm and flicked his wand at his belongings so that they tidied themselves neatly into his bag, before giving her a curt nod and walking away without another word, leaving Hermione to gape at his retreating figure.
A/N Hope you enjoyed the chapter - let me know what you thought. I think one qualifies as a bit of a slow-burner, right?
Anyway, the holiday season is upon us! Is anyone seeing any festive ballets? No Nutcracker for me this year (I saw it at the Royal Opera House last year and Les Patineurs a couple of weeks later!) but I've got the music and DVDs to see me through! I've also got Coppelia lined up in the New Year (I realise that it's not particularly festive but I'm still very much looking forward to it!)
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