Elsewhere, the Kanker sisters heard a deafening explosion. This was followed by earthquake levels of shaking, putting all there Kankers on their asses.

"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?!" A very angry Lee Kanker yelled.

Marie managed to stand up and make it to a nearby window. In the distance, she could see a mushroom cloud.

"Looks like someone set off a bomb! I bet it was Double D finally getting back at all those bastards!" Marie yelled.

"Hah, those sultry slut faces deserve it! Making us wait that long for our dick—I mean loving relationships, yeah!" May yelled.

The two share a laugh. Lee wasn't as enthused though.

"You idiots! If our men DID set off that bomb, then they would have died as well! ...Wait, even if they didn't set it off, then they still might be dead!"

The other two abruptly stopped laughing and gave each other worried looks.

"OH NOOO! DOUBLE D!" Marie cried, at the top of her lungs.

The Kankers rushed out of their trailer in a trailer park frenzy. They couldn't help but feel a bit guilty about not just using sex to seduce them in the first place.

"OUR BOYFRIENDS GOT HIROSHAT ON!" May yelled, making an absolutely awful play on words. Seriously, this was bad even by their standards.

They managed to make it to the partly obliterated Cul De Sac in mere seconds of endless running. All around them, they could see nothing but nuclear fallout and what used to be houses.

"There used to be fifty people here, now it's a Buttered Toast town…" May said, in a somber tone.

While looking around, Marie noticed some rummaging around in a pile of debris. She quickly ran up to it and started to clear it. A very shaken up Eddy popped out of the rubble, visibly traumatized, though not from the explosion.

"Hey, Lee! I found your man!" Marie yelled, a little disappointed.

Lee immediately ran up to Eddy and bear-hugged him, moving faster than the naked eye could see because of her sexual stamina. She nearly crushed his ribs in the process.

"AGGGGHHHHH!" An over hugged Eddy yelled, being squeezed like a stress ball.

"You have no idea how worried I was about you! Now GET READY FOR YOUR MEDICINE HONEY!" Lee yelled, uh...Kankeriffically.

Once again, we're not good with adjectives.

"What!? What are yo- WWOHHAAAAHHHHH!" Eddy yelled as Lee grabbed onto Eddy's cock.

"I'm not waiting anymore! My man is getting a blow job, and he's getting it RIGHT NOW!"

For once, will Eddy have a fun or even decent time with anything?! Find out next time, on Dragon Ball Z!

*Three episodes of filler and steroid-induced wrestler yelling later*

"BLOWJOB TIME HONEY!" A horny Lee Kanker yelled.

She roughly started stroking Eddy's dick, almost ripping the skin.

"OW! THAT HURTS!" Eddy yelled.

"Nah, it'll feel great for you dear! LEMME JUST GET IN POSITION!" Lee yelled back.

Lee got on her knees and stuck her mouth on Eddy's cock, but in the process, she accidentally bit it and squeezed his balls a *BIT* too hard…

"OOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWW! EEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAOWCH JESUS HEEEEEEEELP MEEEEEEEEEE!" Eddy yelled

"Would you two keep it down?! Were trying to find OUR men too!" Marie yelled in the distance.

Eddy swore he could hear The Big Show's theme song play in the background as Lee suplexed him into a 69 position. He didn't have long to think about this though as Lee shoved her unshaved pussy into Eddy's face.

"You can't be the only one having all the fun!" Lee yelled, then going back to give Eddy a VERY toothy blowjob.

Eddy decided to just suck it up and suck another very hairy thing, hoping it would be over soon.

Meanwhile, May and Marie were basically playing real-life Fallout. New Vegas, not those 'other' ones.

"FUCK! WHERE IS ED! I WANNA GET STUFFED LIKE A TURKEY!" May yelled while pulling on her hair.

"Did someone say turkey!?" Ed yelled as he popped his head out of the ground.

Ed then noticed he was talking to one of the Kankers.

"OH NO! THE CLAW MUST BREAK THE LAW, RUN WITH ME EDDY!" Ed yelled. Eddy just replied with soft groaning.

"OH NO YOU DON'T LOVER BOY!" May yelled while attempting to grab Ed.

She managed to grab onto his collar, but Ed was too strong. So she got pulled along for a ride, but not the ride she was hoping for.

"RUN AWAY RUN AWAY!" Ed yelled.

"RIDE EM COWGIRL! STOOOOOOP!" May yelled, tripping Ed up and making him comically fall on top of her.

"THAT'S WHAT I CALL COW TIPPING! HAW, HAW!" Marie yelled in her best impression of Snotty Boy.

May immediately yanked Ed's pants and underwear down and was greeted by a huge cock.

"Why don't you butter my toast, honey?!" May yelled with a borderline ahegao face.

"THIS IS A BUTTERY SIN! HELP ME ASTOLFO!" Ed yelled.

Astolfo appeared from the ground and pulled out a bible.

"As you said before, Ed, rape is not a sin in the Book of Toast. The Book of Chicken says differently, but I don't really care. That chicken is an asshole." Butter Astolfo replied, phasing back into the void.

"You heard the… Uhh, man? TIME FOR ME TO GET SOME MEAT!"

Ed had felt a bit forsaken but knew what had to be done.

"IF IT ISN'T A SIN THEN I MUST WIN! IN THE NAME OF BUTTERED TOAST!" Ed yelled, pulling May down on his cock. The two began sexing each other up like animals, leaving Marie to be a bit jealous.

"WHERE THE HELL IS DOUBLE FUCKING D!? I WANT MY MAN HERE TO TURN MY HAIR FROM BLUE TO CRAYOLA WHITE, NOW!" Marie yelled.

Meanwhile…

A tied up and ball gagged Double D sat by a campfire with the Totally Spies. They wanted to make sure that Double D was completely safe and in no way able to accidentally getaway.

"Hey guys, let's sing a song!" Alex suggested.

"NO." Clover and Sam said sternly.

"MOTHERFUCKER I HAVE THE GUITAR, DON'T TEST ME…*ahem* 'Well we're sitting by the campfire, singing this campfire song! In just a few minutes we'll suck Double D's dong! And if you don't think that we can suck him off faster then you're wrong, so SHUT UP, and JUST SING ALONG…" Alex began.

"THIS IS, OUR, C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E D-O-N-G DONG! OUR-" Alex began singing. Clover joined in with a full-out set of drums.

"CAMPFIRE MOTHERFUCKERS! YEAH! MOTHERFUCKING CAMPFIRES AND SHIT, WE WILL DISSOLVE DOUBLE D'S DOUBLE TESTICLES IN OUR MOTHERFUCKING SALIVA! AAAAAAAAAARRRRRRAAAAAGHHHHHHHH!" A hormoned-up Clover screamed.

Clover and Alex began to play Death Metal, while Sam broke out the microphone and started singing their own, sexual rendition of Metallica. They had already came up with the name 'Carol of the Balls'.

"What the hell...is that a band of women playing a song about Double D?" Marie asked herself from at least a few hundred feet away.

Double D's Kanker sense began to tingle, even though it was just a few remaining swimmers left in his cul-de-ballsack warning him about his impending sex education tutoring.

"MMMMFFFFFFF!" A very scared, tied up Double D yelled.

Sam continued to sing while Alex and Clover played their instruments.

Instruments both in their pants and in the drum set.

"Jingle Bell, jingle bell, jingle bell COCK! Alex is a bitch, but in bed, she rocks! We'll fucking kill you if you steal our man, so don't do stupid shit just because you can!" Sam sang actually rather beautifully.

"Fuck that stupid ass Chrismas shit! We need PYROTECHNICS!" Alex yelled while smashing a big red button.

Suddenly, fire rose out of the ground and shot into the air. Unfortunately, there were trees all over the fucking place, so shit caught on fire quick. Though, only Double D noticed it.

"MMHMMMHHHHHMMMHHHH!" Double D muffled/yelled.

"What was that Double D? You want an encore?! Hell yeah!" Alex excitedly yelled.

The Spies began to play once again, while the fire quickly spread all around them. Double do begin to panic even more and was on the verge of a panic attack.

Double D finally passed out from the stress and days of sex as the forest burned like an epic fiery anime Michael Bay volcano fight...thing. The Spies finally stopped playing, but only because they finally realized how shitty their music was.

"Why did I think this was a good idea?! Who the fuck plays music while camping?!" Alex yelled, to no one in particular.

She was about to throw her guitar at a nearby tree, but immediately stopped when she noticed said tree was on fire.

"Oh damn! This shit is getting- HOLY SHIT! DOUBLE D!" Alex cried out, noticing Double D's pants were now on fire.

"MMMHHHHMHHMMMMHHHHHHMMMMMMMMHMMMM!"

The burning of the flame was enough to wake Double D up.

"OH MY GOD! QUICK, PISS ON THE FLAME!" Sam yelled, in a panic.

The Spies all ran up to Double D and revived themselves all over Double D. He wanted to vomit but the gag wouldn't let him.

Marie finally made her way up. She immediately noticed the spreading fire, and a trio of girls pissing on Double D. Maries' face turned red with rage.

"HEY, YOU DUMB CUNTS! I'M SUPPOSE TO BE THE ONE THAT PISSES ON DOUBLE D!"

This startled the girls, causing them to accidentally piss all over Double D's face. He again gagged, but still could do nothing about it.

"Hey, uh...Who the fuck is this?" Alex whispered to Sam. Sam shrugged in response.

"WHO AM I? WHO AM I?...deep question actually, who are we really? BUT I KNOW WHO I AM! I'M DOUBLE D'S GIRLFRIEND! I'M THE ONE WHO SUCKS HIS NUTS, FUCKS HIM AND SHITS ON THE BED—wait no—PISSES ON THE BED WHEN HE LEAST EXPECTS IT!" Marie yelled extensively.

The Spies and Double D blankly stare at Marie. Double D was trying to figure out who he would rather be the sex slave of, while the Spies processed what she had said.

"So let me get this straight… YOU, some weird looking blue-haired bitch, think that Double D is YOUR boyfriend?" Clover asked while tilting her head.

"I KNOW SO! And I have the photos of me having unconscious sex with him to prove it!" Marie yelled, pulling out a massive photo album and throwing it in front of them.

Upon looking at the many pictures, Double D realized that he was never a virgin all along. This was actually kind of a comforting thought since he at least knew that the Spies didn't steal his virginity. Though, he still didn't like that his virginity was stolen from him.

The Spies, on the other hand, were fuming. Taking Double Ds virginity was their greatest accomplishment. Now, they had nothing.

"I...I-I-I…" Clover tried to say, while her left eye twitched.

A crow cawed in the background. Not because of the pictures though, but because the forest was still burning. Something that only Marie and Double D seemed to be completely aware of at that moment.

Smokey the Bear would be sobbing if the Spies hadn't already killed him for being a bear… Racist cunts.

"I know you three are jealous of me now, but THE FUCKING FOREST IS BURNING TO THE GROUND, AND I WON'T LET YOU GET DOUBLE D KILLED!"

The Spies were so traumatized that they didn't even know Marie was shouting at them (very overdramatically).

Marie noticed that the Spies weren't responding and suddenly felt very awkward. Double D eyed them for a moment, then gave Marie an awkward stare.

"Uh...I'm uh, just gonna take this." Marie said as she picked up Double D and ran off like a Detroit criminal.

The Spies just kinda, well, stood there. Like bimbo gargoyles. Even with the fire now right next to them, they didn't budge. This lasted a few minutes until Sam finally snapped back into reality.

"THAT BITCH TOOK OUR DOUBLE D!"