Thank you for beta'ing, A Star In My Universe! Warning: threats directed at minors, and talk about death and rape.
"Now, the next session can be whenever you'd like. Any questions?" Lourdes wonders aloud.
Daya raises her hand. "When should I tell my friend Adarsh? I've known him for a couple of weeks now."
"You don't ever have to, that's your choice. However, if you wish to do so, you can whenever you feel comfortable."
She appears to be relieved. "Okay. Thank you."
After the meeting is finished, everyone but Lourdes, Red, Blanca, and Maria go over to the Diaz and Mendoza apartment, and the girls decide to hang out in Daya's room. Alex had made sure her mom was okay before leaving her to hang out with her friends, and Diane is fine with it since the other women and Leon are there to keep her company, and Charles is planning on coming over soon.
"Your uncle Mitch died a hero. You would've loved him! He'd spoil you rotten. It's too bad you never got a chance to meet him." Diane smiles sadly at Alex and cups her chin while kissing her forehead. Her mother's eyes are shining with moisture and she sniffles.
"Yeah, it is." Alex hugs her and wipes away leftover tears from her own eyes. "I love you."
"I love you too! Have a great time with your friends, sweetie."
"Thanks, Mom! Same to you."
"Yo, I'm real glad Pocket Daya exposed Holly Hobbie's bitchiness!" Flaca announces once Alex steps inside Daya's bedroom to join them, along with Maritza, Lorna, and Nicky.
Alex's spirits lift when Flaca says this, and the other girls' faces light up, too. "I know, that's awesome! How'd Christina do it?"
"Well, first, Maria casually mentioned that Lorna was gonna babysit Pepa, and Palalalala Polly was acting all squirmy about it, like she didn't trust Lorna to care for Maria's baby-"
"What?! I love children! I want four of my own when I get older!" Lorna protests.
"Yeah, I know, Maria told her that...the fact that you're so fond of babies. She started sayin' shit like, you're mentally ill and you ain't equipped to handle a child...and then Maria and Ouija informed her that you're actually capable of doing so! I was just trying to process the garbage that she was spewing. After that, she asked me who I'd boot out of my clique if we were dying of hunger on a desert island, trying to get me to kick you out!"
Lorna gasps and hisses through gritted teeth. Nicky folds her arms across her chest. "Does she wanna get some Hawaiian punch?"
"I don't know how we stopped ourselves from beating her up, but you're more than welcome to," Daya mutters. "So, uh...she had to call up Larry and Maria let us all know that she didn't trust Holly Hobbie, because she'd made fun of Maria and Blanca last year and she and Piper were tight. Christina randomly walked in and started swearing like a little sailor, and I told her to stop. She loved doing it, though."
The girls laugh. "She's adorable," Maritza comments, and everyone else nods in agreement.
"Yeah...and Cindy asked her to spy on Palalalalalalala-Polly for us, so she did! I found out how truly horrible she was...callin' Alex Supercunt, Flaca a freak who celebrates Halloween year round, and Lorna Looney Tunes," Daya reports. "We kicked her right on outta here!"
Lorna wraps her arms around Daya. "Thanks for finally getting rid of her!" the Italian brunette squeals.
"Yeah, we love you for this!" Alex chimes in and she and Flaca join their hug.
"You're awesome!" Flaca adds.
"Love you girls, too!" Daya exclaims. "Oh...Piper's diary was in my house, I guess I borrowed it one day and never remembered to give it back."
"Can we see what's written?" Lorna asks enthusiastically.
"Sure!"
"Could I read it, like to myself?" Alex wants to know. "I'll pass it around."
"Alright." Daya gives her Piper's journal, and Alex scans it.
April 3rd, 2002
Dear Diary,
I love all this power I hold over Martin Van Buren High! I've improved a lot since sixth grade, back when I was a lame loser. I had these daredevil friends, Jessica, Ralph, and Ryan, who urged me to take risks like jump out the back of the bus when it was moving slowly, like five miles per hour, but I decided not to rebel at that time since I was still a dumb daddy's girl. Also, I didn't wanna break my ankle like Marcy Klein, who attempted a herkie. I thought Ryan's cologne was gross, can you imagine? I wish it were possible to slap my younger self for not being badass, but at least I've gotten better. Nicole and Bojing have nothing on me, even though I wimped out. I was surprisingly still allowed to come to Ryan's for his New Years Eve party. Jessica hadn't abandoned me yet. Later, I finally grew some balls and saw Dazed and Confused with Sara H. I pretended my name was Zoe and wore dorky sunglasses, though, so I admit, that was stupid. Still, I pissed off my mom good with that one, but whatever. I should not have told on myself like an idiot! Nobody does that, come on. It's only you, Diary, who can know that I fuck up at times. I'm not perfect. I can't believe Daddy was kissing some skank there, but at least he didn't notice me. Her name was Linda, and now, he's having an affair with a different Linda. It's so fucking weird. I'd tried to tell Mom, but her only response was grounding me. I talked to Grandmother about it, and she taught me to keep secrets to prevent people from getting their feelings hurt. I was like, okay, sure, that's easy. In seventh grade, though, all those pals I had, dumped me, so I got new ones, threw them away the next day, and picked out the friendless losers at my school to form a clique with. We got along surprisingly well, despite all our differences, and now, they're the best friends I could ever ask for.
X's and O's,
Piper
Alex wordlessly hands it to Lorna, who then passes it to Flaca, and then, it gets returned to Daya.
"Friendless losers, huh?" Flaca demands, sounding highly offended. She frowns, as do Lorna and Daya, and their eyes flicker with rage. Alex sighs shakily as she feels a pain rush through her heart, like it had been run over by a train. "We were, but she gathered us all up out of pity and to make herself the star of the show! It wasn't real, none of it!"
"Wow, she sounds like a gem," Maritza grumbles sarcastically. "I'm sorry she did that to you guys!"
"Fuckin' bitch!" Daya growls and slams the diary on her desk.
"I hate her," Lorna declares harshly.
"Me too," Nicky agrees. "So, that's why she wanted to be the bitch of the school, so nobody would mess with her again!"
"She just took it way too far. Manipulative cunt!" Alex shouts angrily as her eyes fill with tears, and everyone looks at her, probably shocked by her choice of words. "I just...ugh!" She balls up her hands into fists and shakes them while gritting her teeth, attempting not to crumble in front of them.
"I know you loved her, Alex, and I can sense how much this hurts," Lorna tells her sympathetically. She walks toward Alex and gives her a sweet hug. Alex returns it, and then the rest of her friends put their arms around her and Lorna. Being embraced by her girls is making her feel better now.
"Yeah...solid proof really sucks," Alex mumbles and then sniffles.
"We got you," Flaca assures her.
"Mm-hm, and you got us," Daya lets her know.
"This chick's not worth going soft over, Vause," Nicky adds gently.
"She was just a piece of shit," Maritza chimes in. "You're like, gold compared to her!"
"Thanks," Alex answers them quietly while smiling. She squeezes her eyes shut tightly, trying to hold back her emotions.
They separate a minute later. "Daya...I deeply apologize for saying you don't got a clue what being raped is like on Thursday night since you never been through it, when you actually had," Lorna tells her. "I'm so ashamed of myself."
"Don't be. It's cool," Daya murmurs with a shrug. "You had no idea, and I didn't tell nobody except Gloria and just this afternoon, my mom and then you guys at therapy."
"You don't gotta feel bad about it...being sexually violated isn't necessarily something people share...however, I shouldn't have kept Pornstache having sex with my sister to get me out of jail, a secret."
"Why air your family's dirty laundry? It wasn't anyone's business," Nicky insists.
"Yeah, but that kinda thing is what you can tell friends, just make sure it don't get back to Franny! She consented, but only to help me. He ain't tried to get her back since."
"We won't mention nothin' about it to her," Flaca says.
"That's a promise!" Maritza continues, and the other girls nod in agreement.
"I'm glad!" Lorna exclaims.
"Did I overstep?" Diane asks Gloria in concern as all of the adults are supervising the children doing an art project with glue and colorful glitter. "I'm sorry...it's okay if you don't wanna go dancing and drinking with us at all." She feels guilty for proposing the idea to Gloria in the first place, given her past.
"Nah, it's alright! I apologize for never responding to your invitation. I guess I was feeling unsure and didn't know what to say exactly. Yes, I'd love to! It should be fun!"
Diane sighs with relief. "Cool! We can show off our moves!"
"Yeah!"
Aleida winks at Leon. "I do appreciate a man who can dance!"
"I'll wow you on the floor, then, mi corazón," Leon tells her, and she beams with delight.
Julio and Emiliano frown at their bottles of glitter as they shake them. "Help me!" Julio says while holding his out toward Gloria. "It's stuck, Mama!"
"Wont come out!" Emiliano chimes in. He waves his at Aleida.
Christina simply hands hers to Charles, who removes the cap with ease, making Diane smile to herself at how cute he is with assisting kids, and Benny bangs his on the table, in an unsuccessful attempt to loosen the top. "Leon, it's not working!" he whines and pouts while stomping his foot.
"I got it."
"Okay, give it to me," Gloria instructs Julio.
"That's 'cause it ain't open," Aleida points out. Altogether, Gloria, Aleida, and Leon unscrew the caps while Diane twists open the bottles of Elmer's glue so the little ones won't run into this kind of problem again.
They're all soon shaking the glue and squeezing it out, creating random shapes and sprinkling the glitter all over the paper-covered table. It's a messy art project, but luckily they're wearing the right clothes.
"Look, my hands are pretty!" Christina shows Diane her glitter-covered palms and pats Diane's cheek. "Now you're a princess!"
"Thank you, honey," Diane murmurs. She's not too fond of the stickiness on her face, but Christina is having a great time, and that's the most important part.
Aleida sighs heavily. "Christina, it only goes on the paper!" She turns to Diane. "I'm sorry...I caught her putting glitter in Daya's fishbowl and had her clean it out."
"It's okay, it'll come off," Diane reassures Aleida.
"You are lovely, though!" Charles pecks Diane's temple, and she grins like a cat that ate the canary.
Emiliano is about to stick his glitter-coated fingers into his mouth, but Aleida stops him right away. "¡Ay dios mío, you don't eat it!"
"Yeah, that's yucky," Leon adds, and the women wrinkle their noses in disgust.
"I gotta watch my babies like a hawk," Aleida says.
"Julio and Emiliano are in the exploring stage, as they're toddlers," Gloria states. "I'm just glad Julio hasn't reached the terrible twos phase yet, of always saying no. Benny did that until he was about almost four! I'd say, have some carrots! No! Go to sleep, it's nap time. No! You wanna go outside and play ball? No! You wanna dress up as SpiderMan for preschool tomorrow? No! You want your red shirt or orange tank top? No! We gotta go see Tía Lourdes! No! Jesus, he'd decline shit that I know he wanted to do! On and on...that kid would drive me up the wall, but I loved him." She smiles while tousling Benny's hair. "I still do, of course!"
The adults get a chuckle out of this. "Alex, too," Diane remembers. "She could be a handful, but I adored her, like always."
"Look what we did, Mama!" Benny taps Gloria and shows her a collection of colors in a wavy pattern.
"Wow, did you make a rainbow?" Gloria wonders aloud in exaggerated amazement.
"Yeah!" Julio bounces up and down in his seat while clapping his hands.
"You're good artists," Gloria praises them. "What colors do you see, Julio? Benny, let your brother answer, this is what he's learning in preschool! You're already a whiz at this."
"Red, orange, yellow, green, blue, purple!" Julio recites proudly as Gloria points to each wave.
"You are so smart!" She hi-fives both of her sons.
"I can do ABC!" Emiliano informs Aleida.
"Yeah, and I can count to thirty!" Christina puts in. "It's a big number!"
"Me, too!" Benny pipes up.
"Alright, lemme hear it!" Aleida exclaims.
"A, B, C, D, E, F, G-" Emiliano begins.
"One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight..." Christina speaks over his singing.
"H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P..."
"Nine, ten, eleven, twelve...fourteen, no, thirteen...then, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen..."
"Q, R, S, T, U, V..."
"Seventeen, eighteen, nineteen, twenty..." Christina takes a huge breath and then continues. "Twenty-one, twenty-two, twenty-three, twenty-four..."
"W, X, Y, and Z..."
"Twenty-five, twenty-six, twenty-seven, twenty-eight, twenty-nine, aaaaand thirty!"
"Now I know my ABC's, next time won't you sing with meeeee?"
"Yay!" both Benny and Julio cheer.
Aleida gasps while smiling brightly at her children. "Y'all are fuckin' geniuses! Holy shit! I'm real proud of you."
"Yeah, but I messed up," Christina says glumly.
"It's okay! You did your best. You don't gotta be perfect." Aleida cups their chins sweetly and pats their cheeks.
The kids beam at this and hug their mothers with glee, and even if there are glittery handprints on their clothes now, they're the picture of happiness. Diane misses having a child of her own running around. Alex will be her baby forever, but she's grown up and can't really play with Diane like she used to. She hopes that if she and Charles have a huge future together, as in marriage and growing old with each other, he'll agree to give Alex a kid sister or brother.
Suddenly, she has an urge to dance, so she excuses herself and she and Charles drive to an empty ballet studio. Diane starts doing pirouettes and leaps around the room in her light pink casual dress as he watches her with pride. She keeps on spinning with her eyes closed until she senses tears crawling down her cheeks, and she sinks to the floor while crying. She just stays there in the corner, hanging onto the barre with one hand and the other covers her eyes. She puts her right leg over her outstretched left and points and flexes her feet.
"Diane...sweetie pie, what's goin' on?" Charles asks kindly while sitting beside her.
"I...I don't know..." she blubbers. "It just hit me all of a sudden...I'm feeling so fragile..."
"Hmm?"
She gasps in and out deeply and he holds her. "I think I'm having a mid-life crisis! I hang out with women nine years younger than me! Their kids are a decade younger than mine, the kindergarteners, at least."
"Hey, that's okay...you have a lot in common with them, that's what makes you three the best of friends. I have homies of all ages. Think about this for a second...when Daya has her child, Aleida will be a grandmother at age thirty-one."
Diane sniffles. "Oh, yeah...don't tell her, she'll totally freak! She doesn't have gray hair, though, she's got nothin' to worry about..."
"You don't either, baby."
"I do, actually," she mutters through a sigh. "I'm nearing forty and I found a little strand the other day...meanwhile, your hair is like, perfect!"
"So is yours!" he insists while tucking some brunette locks behind her ears. "I could run my fingers through this all day, it's hella sleek and smooth...and you're just so goddamn beautiful. I'm gonna be thirty-nine soon, you'll be forty by that time, but really, it's not a big deal! I see you as a lively spirit and to be honest with you, Diane, you don't look a day over twenty-five!"
Diane giggles a bit through her tears. "Stop! I didn't age that gracefully..."
Charles strokes her cheeks with her thumbs and kisses her lips a few times. "Yeah, you did." He turns her around to face the mirror and she wipes her tears away so she can see herself better. "That is one fine woman right there!" He points at her reflection.
"Yeah, until I get wrinkles or another gray hair..."
"I will, too, and I bet anything that you'll look more fantastic than me!"
Diane bursts out sobbing again. She twists around in his arms and buries her face into his shoulder while scooting closer into him and on his lap. "I miss my brother, Mitch...I should've died instead of him!"
"Don't say that! Why would you..."
"Mitch, um...he saved me...from being gang raped...when I was twenty-one. He knocked those bastards out good...to their deaths, but he was just...extremely angry...and his brain...it exploded! He was gone...within minutes," she explains in a wavery voice as he strokes her hair comfortingly with his lips on her crown. Diane gulps. "I was so alone...he really got me, you know? My friends understood what I was all about, too, but he...he was family. He didn't have to die because of me!" She pulls back from his embrace and notices a wet patch on his shirt where she'd sobbed into it. He glances down sadly at her. "I know we should share everything with each other...so I felt bad about never telling you...god, I'm such a mess!"
"It's okay, honey. I'm so sorry that happened." He brushes her tears off her jaw with his knuckles, but they continue to fall like rain down the sides of her face. "You didn't deserve that shit!"
"Also, I...after we kissed, I...I made Gloria feel uncomfortable by asking if she wanted to come to another triple date...dancing with Fahri...and she may not even be ready yet! I apologized for doing that, but she's fine with going. She was just caught off guard. I'm awful...I didn't even think about it from her perspective!" She whimpers and her breath catches a few times.
"No, you're not!" Charles lifts up her chin so she's looking up at him. "Hey, listen. I promise, you are the nicest, most considerate lady I've ever met. Anyone else probably wouldn't give it a second thought. You were probably just excited, and I'm sure she understands that."
"I guess so...even Aleida didn't say a word about it, and they're extremely close! I know, it's Aleida, yeah, but she's gotten better at that only giving a fuck about herself thing."
"See?"
"Yeah, babe. You do great at comforting me through my insecurities," Diane murmurs as he rocks her from side to side while humming.
"I'll pick you up if you're down, every time!"
"Thank you." She manages a tiny smile.
Charles sends a heart-melting grin back at her. "You're welcome."
"I wasn't sure whether to go Audrey Hepburn or leave my hair down," Lorna is saying as she comes into her room where Nicky is all ready in a white blouse, blue pencil skirt, sheer stockings, and tall black boots. Lorna is a vision in her usual made-up face, a sparkly red long-sleeved top, gray cardigan, tight black leather pants, and a pair of sexy stilettos.
Nicky grins at her cheerfully. "You're beautiful no matter what hair style you choose."
"Thank you." The brunette points to her shoes. "These are kitten heels, like Audrey Hepburn used to wear. Good thing Celeste Chapman isn't my grandmother, since she wouldn't approve of 'em...she's always hated this lady named Mary because she wears kitten heels."
"Well, I love nice high heels on you, they look hot! It would drive me wild if you were naked and only had them on."
Lorna winks at her. "I'll treat you with that fantasy tonight, after your NA meeting."
"Sweet! I'm so pumped." Nicky rolls off Lorna's bed and picks up a vase full of pink, white, and red roses that was hidden from her girlfriend's sight. She walks over to the tiny Italian and gives them to her, causing her eyes to twinkle with happiness. "For you, my lady."
Lorna beams and puts her nose into the petals. "Thank you, Nicky! They're lovely, as are you!"
Nicky grins back at her. "You're welcome, Lorna, and thanks for the compliment!"
"No problem." Lorna fluffs out her freshly curled hair in the mirror. "I'm goin' with a half pony," she decides aloud, and gathers some of her hair into an elastic. She leaves tendrils out to frame her pretty face, twists her hair around her fingers, and lays it on her shoulders so it hangs to her chest. She beams fondly at her reflection and Nicky comes up to her and embraces her from behind.
"You're a stunner," Nicky murmurs and then kisses Lorna's cheek and lips.
Lorna closes her eyes and brings Nicky's arms tighter around her as she blushes and a giddy smile crosses her face. "Mmm...I love when you do that."
"I'm happy showing affection to my girl, who obviously deserves it!"
"So do you."
They walk to the movies after they get off the bus. Lorna's excited and is now pulling Nicky toward the theater. They're running to it and Lorna is a ball of energy. Nicky adores that about her. In fact, Nicky loves everything about her brunette girlfriend. She wants her to be Mrs. Lorna Nichols someday.
"Nicky, the tickets," she hears Lorna say faintly with a giggle. Nicky realizes she'd spaced out for about five minutes.
"Oh, right," Nicky stammers, pulling out money and handing it to the person at the counter. "Two tickets to see The Exorcism, please."
The person eyes Lorna suspiciously. "Sure you're old enough to see this movie?"
Nicky chuckles and Lorna scowls. "I'm fifteen."
"I think she was joking," Nicky murmurs and then takes their tickets. Lorna takes hers from Nicky's hand and they get popcorn to share. Nicky leads Lorna to their theater and pushes the armrest out of the way. This is why Nicky is glad to watch a horror movie. She predicts Lorna is the type of girl to cuddle up when she's scared, though Nicky would never tell her that. The dim light makes Lorna's face look even sexier. Lorna places the popcorn between them, but Nicky knows it'll probably get knocked over during the movie.
Sometime during the film, Nicky's arm goes over her small shoulders and she relaxes. Lorna eyes meet hers for a split second and she scoots closer to her. A loud scream and a crash is heard from the movie and Lorna jumps. The girl on the screen is positioning herself in weird ways that has Lorna covering her eyes and peeking between two fingers. Nicky holds the small Italian protectively against her and she sighs contentedly. Nicky's fingertips trail down Lorna's arm a few times and she seems to relax even more. "It's okay, doll, we can go if you want," Nicky whispers.
"No, it's not that scary-oh my God, did you see that?" Lorna almost shrieks as the girl's head turns fully around. Lorna lays her face against Nicky's chest and Nicky brings her hand to the back of Lorna's head and strokes her hair. She grabs Nicky's hand and never lets it go through the whole movie. Lorna's tight grip on her hand loosens slightly as soon as the movie is over. She gasps in shock when the screen suddenly goes black and then fades to the credits. Nicky guides her out of the dark theater. "Hope I don't get nightmares tonight," Lorna mutters to herself.
"Well, it was a good movie to watch around Halloween," Nicky comments.
"I know," Lorna agrees.
When they exit the theater, a chill runs through the both of them and Nicky sees her holding her thin sweater tighter around her body. She shrugs out of her jacket and hands it to Lorna.
"I'm f-fine, Nicky," she stutters, but her teeth are chattering and Nicky can see goosebumps forming on Lorna's arms.
"Lorna, you're freezing. Please, I insist!"
"I d-don't want you to get c-cold..."
"I won't, don't worry!" Nicky helps Lorna into her jacket and she sighs from its warmth. Nicky laughs when she sees that the bottom of her jacket reaches Lorna's knees and the arms have to be rolled up five times to fit her tiny frame.
"What can I say, I'm short," she says, giggling. That giggle is going to be the death of Nicky, if not Lorna.
"Yeah, you really are! I had a blast!" Nicky slings her arm around Lorna's waist and they walk back to the bus together to head to NA.
"I did, too!"
As soon as they get into the meeting, Nicky sees a slightly older African American man who appears to be in his twenties, walking with a limp and pressing his hand to his side, and he seems to be in excruciating pain. Nicky is well aware that he'd been shot dead, but he closely resembles RJ. Even though she hadn't known the guy well enough to picture him perfectly, he had come home every night for dinner, and she can tell it actually is him. "RJ?!" she asks before her brain can catch up with her mouth.
"Shh!" he hisses while narrowing his eyes at her. A terrified look crosses his features.
Lorna stands to her feet. "Hey, don't talk to her like that!"
Nicky sits down next to him and Lorna goes to her other side. "It's fine, Lorna." She looks over at RJ. "We thought you were dead!" she says in a much quieter voice.
"I'm supposed to be...I survived my gunshot wounds, limped away hours later, fainted and hit my head...then, I woke up from a month-long coma in the hospital. I then had to replace my own body with an actual corpse and start a new life in the Bronx, so that motherfucking cop won't find me again." Nicky and Lorna gasp sharply. "He attempted to kill me! I can't ever go back to Harlem. I think Vee had a hit out on me because I was doing my own deals behind her back. I'm not sure if I should tell Taystee, because she was so stupid about that bitch. I'm really trying to stay away from drugs. I'm a new man now, starting a new life...and college tomorrow. I've even got a girlfriend." He tilts his head towards a Latina with a slightly rounded stomach, indicating that she's pregnant, and waves at her. She returns the gesture. "Her baby isn't mine, the idiot father's in prison, but I'mma take care of both Margarita and her child."
"Whoa," is all Nicky can comment.
"Cesar's other woman?" Lorna asks awkwardly.
"She don't love him anymore and she never visits that punk. His main lady with low-self-esteem does, though."
"Oh, wow...I didn't know Aleida had those issues," Lorna mumbles. "I don't advise you to reveal yourself to Taystee because she's still loyal to Vee, and would tell your satanic foster mother the good news that you're alive after all."
"She sobbed at your funeral, and so did Vee, but I guess those were fake tears," Nicky mutters.
"Yeah, that cunt could act," RJ says bitterly. "Does Taystee still visit my grave?"
"Of course," Nicky replies gently. "She was devastated the night Tricia and I left, just after you were thought to be murdered. Look man, you should stay far away from Taystee and continue to act as if you're six feet under. She goes to Martin Van Buren High to retake English, and you know where she works, right?"
"Shake Shack, Storky's, and Pizza Hut," he recites off the top of his head. "I got a disguise for when I go out into the world, a hat and sunglasses so I look like any other black dude on the street with his girl, who happens to be pregnant. That way, Vee and her cop buddy don't got a chance of recognizing me, and neither will Taystee or the other girls, like Suzanne, Janae, and Cindy. I won't even speed or litter, so I don't catch police attention. I ain't goin' out after dark, and I'm only taking morning and afternoon classes at the Bronx Adult Learning Center."
Nicky claps his back lightly and they smile at each other. "Good plan, bro. I hope Taystee sees what a monster Vee is soon, though!"
"Thanks, sis. Me too!"
"This! This is why I hate drugs!" Lorna states. "I've never used as much as a cigarette. Aleida goes there too for school, so maybe you two could strike up a friendship. She's like you, in the way that she's trying to stay sober and succeeding."
"Cool. Are you here to support Nicky? Margarita and I are doing this together."
"How sweet is that? Yeah, we're girlfriends! Aleida goes to these meetings, too, but she's so good at staying off heroin that she never needs to come, except for when she wants to give speeches and receive her milestone chips."
"I'm just here for motivation," Nicky says. "I'm proud to say that I've been clean for about three weeks now!"
"Congratulations to you both."
"Thanks," they reply in unison.
"Why don't you like not-sugar, Leon?" Benny asks in the middle of Aleida and Leon taking turns reading him and Christina I Love Saturdays/Y Domingos. Daya is changing Emiliano's diaper while Gloria does Julio's.
A pained expression crosses Leon's face. "A couple of years ago, someone I loved very much went to Heaven because of it."
"Ohh..." Benny responds sadly. He, Christina, Daya, Gloria, and Aleida give Leon sympathetic looks. The children continue flipping through the book, fascinated by the pictures and reading silently to themselves.
Aleida is shocked that her boyfriend had never told her. "Who?" she wants to know.
"Well, uh...my friend, Rosalita Pontz. She was...addicted to the stuff, she always wanted it. She'd committed armed robbery...that's taking things that don't belong to you...and I told her she'd get eleven years in jail if she was caught. She stopped for a while, the stealing and not-sugar, but then she had a relapse and we got into a huge fight. I was about to ask her to date me, when these bad people killed her while zooming past us in their car. They had definitely taken not-sugar." Leon sighs heavily and Aleida feels horrible for him, but she can't help but be jealous that he used to make some other chick's life better with him in it. At least now, they're even. She's not the only one hung up on somebody. He looks around at everyone in the room and draws Aleida closer to his side while pecking the top of her head a few times. "I thank God every day that you didn't suffer the same fate, Lei."
"Rosalita...that's a pretty name," Aleida mutters. "I'm real sorry you lost her. She was lucky to have you."
"I couldn't protect her...I failed!"
Aleida squeezes his hands and reaches up to kiss his lips. "You did your best, just like you're doin' with me!"
"I apologize that I never mentioned it at the triple date. It's just too raw, even after two years."
"Oh...it's okay." After kissing and hugging all of the kids good night, the adults and Daya walk out and Gloria heads into the bathroom to wash her face. Aleida and Leon go into their bedroom. "Does it hurt to remember her?" she wonders aloud as they get under the sheets and face each other.
"Yeah. I think about her from time to time if I see a drive by shooting in the news or hear about one in a movie, television show, or song." Leon brushes his knuckles against her cheek and then threads his fingers through her hair. As she scoots closer to him and drapes her arm over his waist, she can see the sadness in his eyes. A stray tear trickles down his cheek and she wipes it off with the pad of her thumb. Noticing how he's so upset about this breaks Aleida inside, not only because Rosalita was the chick he'd always wanted to be with, but also since he's hurting, which is actually the current situation. Rosalita is long gone, and logically, Aleida doesn't have any competition. "You remind me of her...that's part of why I'm so drawn to you. I mean, I liked you since we started flirting back and forth, but I wanted to work harder at helping you through your addiction. I was desperate to stop you from falling off the wagon."
"I was never hooked on drugs! In fact, I been sober most of the times I'm talkin' to you and I ain't been dangerous at all! It's really just Cesar," Aleida confesses, and his movements still as he exhales loudly. "I can't stop visiting him and cut him out of the picture entirely. He just so happened to abuse heroin and I packed it for him and his club of hoodlums." She slides her legs in between his and strokes the stubble on his jaw with her fingertips. He runs his hand down to the middle of her back and then up again.
"Well, that makes me more hopeful, that you're not a regular user and you weren't, ever. Also, you didn't give up your kids and you all had a roof over your heads."
"Nah...Daya was in foster care for a year 'cause I thought I couldn't handle being a single mother to a bratty four-year-old. I'm sorry, I know that sounds terrible of me to say, but...I was lousy! I missed her a lot, though...I was glad when she came back to me. The caseworker passed and the temp was an alcoholic."
"You cared about her, though, that's different."
"So, you pick girls who may need saving from themselves? That's okay...every dude wants a girl to need him. They wanna be the helper, the protector...and women like men like that!"
"My mom was young when she had me...fourteen, to be exact. I've always felt protective of the ladies in my life."
Aleida kisses his neck. "I love that about you. It sounds like Rosalita didn't deserve you as her man anyway. She cared about smack more than you."
"I didn't think I could move on until I met you, Lei. You gave me strength to do so."
"I thought I didn't do nothin' useful in this relationship. Like, when you met me, I was poor, uneducated, unemployed, a bad motha...while you had taken college, you got a good job, and you're hella fantastic with kids. I'm just learning...and I started college late...you got so much to offer me, but I...I don't," she admits regretfully.
"That's not true, baby...you're offering yourself! You have so many good qualities...you're an excellent listener, funny, sweet, caring in the way you look after others, and your beauty is timeless." He leans down to gently connect his mouth with hers. "I understand you had struggles before, but you have all of us now."
Aleida smiles so widely that her cheeks hurt and she kisses him back with more fervor. "Thank you...and hey, remember, I got your back, too! I never experienced loss of a loved one, but I can be there for ya. Maybe we can visit your could've-been woman soon, if you're okay with that? I'll even bring flowers, probably roses, since that would've been my nickname for her, had we been besties."
Leon holds her tightly, like he's afraid she'll fly away from him, and his lips are pressed to the spot below her eye. "Sure, it'd be nice!"
"Yo...you won't be able to get rid of me that quickly. I ain't never gonna die. I promise," she assures him.
Then, in the darkness and comfort of the bedroom that's now theirs, and not just hers, the couple makes out soundlessly, long and soft, with their fingers locked and bodies molded together. From here on out, she wants to provide him with much more comfort than usual.
After the meeting, Nicky and Lorna join Alex, Michelle, Flaca, and Maritza, for a triple date at Shake Shack, just to get fries for a late-night snack. They're in casual evening wear-jeans, boots, cute colorful tops, and leather jackets. Lorna and Nicky are too busy shoveling food into their mouths to really talk, so they listen to their friends shoot the shit. Alex is the only one who eats something more, which is a cheeseburger with a slice of tomato. "Mmm, delicious," she's saying between bites.
Michelle pops a fry into her mouth. "This is, too...nice and salty...and warm! So...you know I had fun with you last night," she murmurs while taking Alex's hand in hers. Lorna beams to herself at their cuteness. Her raven-haired friend blushes.
"Yeah...I did, too. Dancing with you was awesome...I can't wait for homecoming."
"Me neither. I liked meeting your mom, she's so much kinder than mine." They beam at each other while giggling and Alex skims her thumb across Michelle's knuckles a few times. "So, what'd you do today?"
"Um...nothing, really...except Gloria's aunt arranged a therapy thing and I went to it, along with the rest of our crew. Sorry I didn't invite you to come along...it would've been boring, anyway. All we talked about was horror movie-esque shit we've experienced in our lives. I didn't even wanna go, but my mom made me." Alex rolls her eyes. "It was so awkward, but I got through it. Gloria's aunt was really kind to us, and it actually helped, much to my pleasant surprise. In a way, I'm glad my mom coaxed me into attending."
"It's alright, though, I would've liked to be at your side."
"Thanks. You can go with me next time!"
"Okay, awesome!"
"How was your day?"
Michelle sets her chin on her fist. "Pretty uneventful...uh, Reema, my lab partner, came over and we badmouthed Mr. Davis and even drew devil horns and a beard on a picture of him that we'd printed from the Internet."
Alex chuckles. "Why?"
"He gave us real hard dumbass homework over the weekend, and we needed a good laugh!"
"Ohh! He had a thing for Ms. McCullough, I'm not sure if you knew. My mom knows all the teacher gossip."
"Ms. McCullough don't like him back," Maritza cuts in. "Girl, please, he just lusted after her boobs!"
"What an idiot," Alex mutters while shaking her head in disapproval. "Mr. Rikerson once asked my mom out, but she turned him down. He's nice and cool, but I don't want him dating her! It's weird to have your teacher as your stepdad or the guy your mom's seeing!"
"Yeah, but Diane was your teach last year," Michelle reminds her.
"Dude, she's my mom, it's different." Alex shrugs. "No judgements!" She pushes her slippery tomato back into her cheeseburger and takes another bite.
Michelle points a fry at Alex. "True. Yo, would you rather have your mom be with your teacher or coach, or somebody who all the high school girls are attracted to? Like, a third of my crew is into Leon, plus a few outsiders, like Cindy and that stupid white Nazi bitch whose grandma calls black people fuckin' darkies!"
"Jennifer's a pathetic loser," Alex grumbles after swallowing. "Uh...I dunno! Both situations are awkward! Maybe the second option, though, since Daya seems to be dealing okay. Besides, they won't be in high school forever, they'll get over him eventually. As long as it doesn't affect the relationship between him and my mom, it should be fine."
"I agree!"
Flaca grins. "Well, just to let y'all know, I'm done with my crush on Leon, 'cause I have Mari!" She twirls a lock of her short girlfriend's hair around her finger, and Maritza beams. "Also, outta mad respect for Aleida, and I don't want her kickin' my ass or nothin'! I told Daya all that, and she was super happy!"
Lorna gulps down her food. "Oh, good thing!"
Nicky clears her throat. "Fantastic!"
"Hey, Michelle...have you picked out your dress for next Friday?" Alex wants to know.
Michelle smiles at her. "Hell yeah, you?"
"I did." Alex grins and then explodes into giggles. She snorts behind her palm and her eyes widen.
"What?"
"Nothing...just randomly thinking about Mei Chang brushing her teeth with salt. That's so gross and weird, who does that? She was at the store when my mom and I went shopping with Charles."
"Well, Chang, for one!" Michelle chuckles. "I seriously cannot stand her. Ouija says she's annoying as fuck! She came into Chang's pharmacy for a pregnancy test, and Chang was all, another whore, you're preggers too young while looking at her strangely! She did the same thing to Maria last year!"
"She did that to Daya, too," Lorna puts in.
"Weeeir-do!" Flaca comments in a singsong voice.
"Also, just plain rude!" Maritza adds.
"I went in there for pain meds. She said her fingers smell like an old tennis ball," Nicky informs them.
"Eeew!" the girls exclaim while cracking up.
"She's around Red's age, she'd fit in with the Golden Girls, but she doesn't think much of them and she completely disrespects us teens and even the younger adults, like my mom and her friends and Sophia and Crystal Burset." Alex scoffs.
"Chang is a nobody! Fuckin' friendless loser," Michelle grumbles.
"Hebei province of China in the seventies was probably a hell of a lot different than here in that same time period," Lorna murmurs.
"It was," Nicky confirms. Everyone looks at her questioningly. "You're talking to a history freak here!"
"She's passed by our school once and while Maureen and some others were playing basketball, she was hit in the head 'cause she walked straight in the middle of it!" Flaca says, and Maritza rolls her eyes. "They should've apologized, but like, look where you're goin', ya know?"
"Yeah," they all agree.
"Yo, we went on our date last night, and it was hella bomb, especially 'cause of that ABC's of You game we played," Maritza announces while pressing a light kiss on the inside of Flaca's wrist. "We tied, by the way. Just recently, Nichorello here were on theirs, to see The Exorcist," she reports while swinging her arms around Michelle and Nicky. "When are you guys gonna have alone time?"
"Pretty soon, but we don't wanna rush things," Alex replies while gazing at Michelle with love in her green eyes.
"We officially met on Thursday," Michelle says dreamily.
"Right...it ain't even been a week yet!" Flaca points out.
Nicky, Lorna, Flaca, and Maritza begin talking about their individual dates. Maritza and Michelle have them all laughing after explaining what the ABC's of You game is.
"It sounds extremely adorable," Lorna comments. Nicky and Alex pretend it's too sappy for their tastes, but Lorna sees through their facades. She knows them too well. They're soft when it comes to girls they love.
"What you two been up to lately, besides the movies?" Michelle asks while her eyes travel between Nicky and Lorna.
"Nothing much," they answer at the same time. Lorna isn't sure that Michelle is a good secret keeper, so she doesn't want to tell her anything about RJ. It could get back to Taystee in a heartbeat and put an innocent person in danger.
"Oh, jinx!" Flaca calls out, and Nicky and Lorna start giggling together. She reaches across the table and strokes Maritza's cheek with her thumb. "You're super pretty, mi amor."
"Gracias, and you are too, you got a natural beauty," Maritza compliments her back while beaming.
Flaca beams. "¡Gracias!"
"Hey, hon," Lorna starts out while tracing Nicky's tattoo above her elbow. "You got amazing eyes." Nicky grins widely and dimples appear on her cheeks. "I ain't kiddin', I can't stop staring into 'em. Also, you're really adorable, I love your smile!"
"Thanks, baby! You sure know how to make a girl feel special. Lorna, you're so beautiful...always!"
"Thank you, Nicky!" They both stand up and exchange a heated liplock, and Lorna moans softly when Nicky nibbles on her bottom lip.
"Get a room!" Michelle complains.
This just makes Flaca and Maritza start kissing passionately. Alex groans. "Oh, come on!"
"Y'all claim to be lesbians before you ever tried dick, try some dick and see how that gayness disappears!" some idiot cuts in, and they turn around to face Joey, who looks pleased that he'd interrupted them.
"Straight men claim to be straight before they ever tried dick, try some dick and see how that straightness disappears!" Maritza fires back at him.
"Ohhh, burn!" Flaca snaps her fingers in front of his face. "Outta here, white boy." The girls flip him off until he leaves the burger joint at last.
They take the bus back to their houses since after going to Shake Shack, they'd ventured all the way to Manhattan and didn't want to bother anyone for a ride this late. On their way home, Lorna notices three tough-looking Spanish men boarding the bus. Since they're heading in the girls' direction, she spreads herself out by putting her purse across two seats beside them and laying completely down, with her head on her girlfriend's lap and her legs on Alex's knees. She smiles at Nicky threading her fingers through her hair. They're in the very back, so there's room for one more person to sit with them. Nicky is completely unaware of this, since she has her eyes closed and headphones on. She's cheerfully bobbing her head to her music while tapping her foot rhythmically. The rest of them, except Lorna, are equally distracted. Flaca and Maritza are heavily making out on another row of seats on one side of the bus with Flaca's broken leg outstretched and her crutches next to her, while Alex and Michelle are chattering away excitedly one seat down from Lorna. As the guys come closer and smirk at Lorna while waving, she taps Nicky frantically and kicks at Alex. She hates talking to strangers, but the rest of her crew, especially Nicky, is great at getting weird people to leave them alone.
"Huh...what?" Nicky grumbles.
Alex removes her elbow from Michelle's shoulder where it had been resting. "'Sup?"
"Some people we don't know are saying hi to me and giving me creepy grins, and I dunno why! Here they come now."
"It ain't just you...they're kinda doin' it to all of us, but me and Alex were trying to ignore 'em and act natural," Michelle informs Lorna. "They're givin' me the skeevies."
"Yeah, us, too," Flaca and Maritza say in unison as they break away from each other.
"Okay." Nicky pauses her music and yanks her earbuds out. She glances at the men curiously. "You're kinda freakin' my girls out here. They're not interested in speaking to you since they got no idea who any of you are."
"Oh, really?" One of them sits at the end of the row that's closest to Maritza, and the other two take spots beside Nicky, on another row. "I'll introduce myself, then. Duardo Velasquez. I'm the leader of the game. These are my sidekicks, Paco and Pepe." Duardo gestures to them. "Paco's a jokester, Pepe gets us places to make some H, and we're missing two of our packers. One's in the big house, while his little bitch has got a bodyguard for herself."
Lorna tenses up, since she recognizes their names from when Daya had mentioned that they're in a gang who used to work with Cesar, and Duardo is his cousin. The Latinas and Alex turn white as sheets. "Alright...cool, sorry to hear that," Alex says in a bored voice.
"Yo, we're just trying to chill here..." Flaca trails off when his beady eyes stare the group down.
"You see this?" Duardo lifts up his shirt to reveal his chest, and his cronies do the same. The six girls gasp at their tattoos that say Gloria equals with a skull and crossbones underneath.
"Oh, that gave you quite a reaction, I see! Her boyfriend has the exact one! He and Cesar gave it to each other in the slammer," Paco informs them as Pepe and Duardo snicker. "Isn't that funny? I think it's hilarious."
"Gloria?" Lorna pipes up, attempting to play dumb. "Who's that?"
"Don't try to act stupid with us, girlie, we've watched you get into her car with some brats after trashing some dude's house," Pepe growls, and she shrinks further into Nicky's arms. Flaca tucks Maritza's head under her chest as she holds her protectively. Michelle cuddles closer to Alex, seeking comfort. "You're all familiar with her."
"Only thing is, we never see the snitching cunt around...when she's alone, at least. Aleida refuses to confess, and we got an ax to grind with her, too, but Cesar says she ain't worth it. She keeps saying it was a random drug bust...we supposed to believe that shit when Gloria hates Cesar's guts and actually threatened to turn us in upon her arrival?" Duardo chuckles slowly and creeps closer to Lorna and Nicky, forcing Lorna to move her things so he can be right between her and Alex, who is clutching the key that Charles had apparently made for her and Diane. She'd most likely use it as a weapon if need be.
"Hey, give us some space!" Michelle says loudly, probably trying to alert the driver, but the man at the wheel doesn't notice since the bus is so noisy. She groans while scratching her forehead and wincing.
"Yeah, we know nothin' of that night...except for the fact that Cesar got exactly what he fuckin' deserved!" Maritza adds with a scowl.
"Daya's family is actually functional now without that asshole," Nicky states strongly.
"Shut up, blondie!" Paco hisses. "Cesar's gotten away with murder before when they saw his gun in his pocket, and it can happen again once he figures out a way to escape, or he'll have us do it for him!"
"Just go away, please..." Lorna begs them meekly. She feels like crying, but she doesn't want to do it in front of them.
"It was Gloria, right?" Pepe asks harshly. "Admit it!"
"Nah, we ain't gonna sell her out when she didn't even do nothin'!" Flaca retorts and glares at them.
"You losers won't get anything out of us, so stop wasting our time and yours!" Michelle puts in furiously.
"So it was her?" Duardo questions the girls while rubbing his hands together. An evil grin crosses his face. "Cesar should've shot that bullet right between her eyes...or through her lips and out the back of her head. Like...whoosh!" He imitates shooting himself in the mouth and then jerks his thumb backward from behind his head. "It would've solved our problem."
Lorna shivers and whimpers softly. Nicky shushes her while pressing a kiss to the top of her head. "No, you're dead wrong!" Maritza yells. "Gloria would've been too afraid with him pointing his gun at her, that's scary as fuck." She raises an eyebrow at him. "Think about it, hombre."
Alex nods and pushes her glasses up on her nose. "Mm-hm! It's called common sense. She wouldn't wanna aggravate him even more by calling the cops."
The bus comes to a stop. "You better be right, putas," Paco snarls threateningly as they finally get off. The friends sigh with relief when they're gone.
"Jesus, that was so fucked up," Nicky whispers.
"I ain't never gonna take a bus this late at night again...just because we got some creeps in jail, doesn't mean the police caught 'em all," Lorna mumbles shakily.
"Yeah...I'll certainly tell Charles about them," Alex lets the girls know. "There's no way any of us are safe with them lurking around the streets."
"How would we describe their appearances, like what they were wearing and shit?" Michelle wonders aloud.
"Don't worry, chica, I recorded it and everything!" Maritza jiggles the heavy bangle that's around her wrist and smirks. "We never know who we'll run into."
"You're a total fuckin' brainiac," Flaca murmurs and the girls hug Maritza while thanking her.
They go to Charles' apartment and Alex unlocks the door with her personal key. He's still up and watching television. "Hey, Charles, I'm home...is my mom in bed?" she asks quietly. The girls trail in after her.
"Mm-hm, she wanted to wait up for you, but she was getting exhausted, so I told her I'd stay awake and she could turn in." Charles frowns. "It's a school night, you should be sleeping, too."
"Sorry," Alex mutters sheepishly. "I didn't know we'd be out for this long." Lorna beams at the way Charles is acting like a real father to Alex.
"At least you gave us updates." He glances at them in concern. "Uh, what's wrong? Are you girls okay? You all look so alarmed."
"Actually, no. See, um...I don't wanna worry Mom about this or anything, but you know Cesar, right?" At Alex's question, Charles nods. "Well, his gang interrogated us on the bus about who snitched on him to the cops. They're trying to get us to say it was Gloria, but it wasn't. We actually don't know who...but according to Aleida, police were busting people randomly for drugs that night."
"Mari got it all on her big-ass bracelet," Flaca chimes in, and Maritza slides it off her wrist. She hands it to him.
"There's a built-in-camera. I wear it when I go out, for protection!"
Charles examines it. "Well, thank you for this! Did they hurt you in any way?" he asks worriedly.
"Nah," Michelle and Nicky respond in unison, and the others shake their heads no.
"We were really scared, though," Lorna admits.
"I'm so sorry, but good thing you're alright. I'll check this out, but I'll give you rides home first. Alex..." Charles tilts his head toward where Diane is asleep, and she nods to his unspoken order. After hugging the girls good night, wrapping her arms around Michelle the longest, she goes into the hall and takes a right.
Nicky asks him to take her and Lorna to the Morellos' place so Red doesn't freak out, Maritza goes to Flaca's house, and Michelle tries to insist on taking a bus, but Flaca and Maritza have her stay with them, since nobody wants her alone anymore, not after this.
Lorna's phone vibrates with a text, and it had been sent to her, Flaca, and Alex only. Ask Daya, she knows everything and could help you out of this mess! Xo, P
Thank you for reading and reviewing, A Star In My Universe, CoffeeWritingAddiction, Double99, and MinervaSnape394!
