Author's Note:As a note, this story only takes the events of the base game KH3 into account, excluding any future games/dlc. Still gotta get around to playing Re:Mind. :)


Tin Men

Chapter Two


THEN

It was too similar to the last time she'd been here.

Darkness...the word only scratched the surface. A place that light had never touched, had never even known. Thick as the humid air on Destiny Islands — thicker. It wasn't that she couldn't see or hear or taste — those senses simply didn't exist. Only darkness filled the space, endless and indivisible.

A strong heart could withstand the dark—but not forever. She would never find her way out on her own…not without someone who knew the way.

Where was he?

Seconds ticked by. Or was it hours? She started to panic—until she realized that there was, in fact something different this time. Even though there was no physical sensation, she somehow felt it—a translucent golden string looped loosely around her wrist and extending far up into darkness.

When she gripped it with trembling fingers, she was filled with the smell of books, the taste of black tea, and the sound of Merlin humming a tune in her memory. The essence of his magic, bottled into sensation. But it was fading—fading fast. Desperate, she grasped the thread and kicked her feet, following the string, up, up, up.

One moment she was swimming in darkness. Next, she was no longer alone.

Her hand brushed into something. Immediately, she felt it reach for her—the sensation of a phantom hand gripping her elbow. This touch felt different—like a small flame lapping against her skin, a heat to push back the deep pervading cold. But unlike her, it—he—was far less substantial, like smoke flickering and fading save for the places where they connected...

Without warning, the gold light warbled, then popped out of existence. She felt the loss of it dragged from her and replaced with oppressive silence. And then...it was too similar to the last time she'd been here. The last time she'd lost her heart. Panic rose up in her chest as she pulled away—

Kairi. His hand, tight on her arm. I am here.

It wasn't the words that pulled her back. It was the voice. He'd chased her into the dark once before, lies dripping honey sweet and deadly. But this time…this time he sounded in pain.

Heart in her throat, she reached back for him at the exact same time he pulled her forward.

They crashed together, a flurry of limbs and bruises and heat. If she had felt nothing before, she felt everything of him now. Each point of contact burst white hot through her senses, a sensation not unlike the kiss of water against a parched man's lips.

Her hands, banging on his shoulders. His arms, digging hard against her sides. Her nose, warm against the hollow of his throat. His breath, curling around the shell of her ear.

Axel, she thought anxiously, and the flame of him grew brighter in her arms. But so too did the darkness—no longer a calm space, but a churning sea whipped up by a violent storm, eager to tear apart her only remaining anchor. In response she felt his jaw against her forehead clench, the fingers of one of his hands lacing through hers, and even though she would have balked at the intimacy in the light, here she clung back.

Princess. She felt his cheek against her hair. There was fear in him too, but also relief. He felt much more solid now. Don't let go.


NOW

Her apartment complex was old. Brown stacco on the outside and a heavy metal fire escape that extended up one side of the building. Orange threadbare carpet lead the way to a staircase that had seen too many coats of paint. Every time she placed her hand on the rail small paint chips came away on her skin.

It was funny how she noticed these little things now, when she'd never noticed them before.

Four flights of steps later found Axel and Kairi standing awkwardly in a small hallway as she searched for her keys. Another thing she had never noticed—everything in the place was just slightly too cramped. Axel had to duck every door way they'd passed. Even just standing with her back to him now as she fished around in her gym bag (of course her keys would be somewhere at the bottom), she could feel the warmth that always radiated off of him, hear the creak of leather as he shifted, see his scuffed black boots in her periphery.

Within the span of a few minutes, two people passed by, forcing Axel to flatten against the wall to let them pass. The last one—a lady with a small dog tucked under one arm like a newspaper, glowered up at him and humphed as she squeezed by.

"Nice neighbors," he commented, possibly the first thing he'd said since the quiet bus ride back.

Kairi made a noise, flashing a look at the lady's back as she turned the corner. "Number fourteen," she whispered, glancing up at Axel as she slid her key in the door. "She doesn't like me. Sorry."

Axel raised a curious eyebrow, but then she swung open the heavy door with a rusty creak, revealing a dark hallway. She stepped in, toeing off her shoes. "Welcome," she said, pulling the chain on her hall lamp that washed everything in a low orange light. "Please ignore the mess."

Axel sized up the doorframe skeptically. "Short people," he muttered.

She grinned a little. "You're just freakishly tall." She took a minute to dump her gym bag in the hall closet—she'd throw the whole thing into the wash later—and glanced over her shoulder to see Axel duck into her apartment. The sight of his bright red hair next to her ancient dusty hall lamp and the black coat hanging on a chipped coat rack made her blink.

It'd been…awhile…since she'd had someone in her apartment. A guy.

Their eyes met and he paused. Maybe there was something on her face. "What?"

"Nothing." Kairi smiled, stuffing her nervous hands in her pockets. She turned shuffling down the hall. "Mind locking it, please?"

Behind her, the door creaked and then shut. As she hooked a right into her tiny kitchen, she heard the sound of the dead bolt sliding with a click, then the metal chain rattling.

By the time Axel popped his head into her kitchen, which was barely big enough to fit a small table and two plastic chairs, Kairi had shed her hoodie and was head deep in the fridge. Several food stuffs were already stacked on the counter beside her.

"I'm gonna eat," she said, surfacing to put three condiment bottles and a jar of pickles on the counter. She pulled her long hair up in a pony tail, loose strands of hair brushing against her face. She looked to find him staring. "Want anything?"

"Uh, I'm good," he said, watching her as she reached on tip toes to grab a loaf of bread off her small fridge. She shrugged, then gestured at him to take a seat, which he did by taking up half the kitchen with his long legs and nearly blocking access to the fridge. She paused, shooting him a glare as she plunked into the other seat beside him, but all he did was grin shamelessly at her.

"Quaint," he said, eyes flickering around the small room and lingering on the one ragged tea towel hanging off the stove and the ceramic red teapot half full of cold tea. "Cute."

Kairi snorted as she reached over to grab lettuce from the counter top. "Boring. At least that's what Selphie says."

He cocked his head at the name, and she was reminded that he wasn't Sora or Riku, who would know who she was talking about. "An old school friend," she added. "You'll probably meet her." If he ended up hanging around, that is.

Another awkward silence. They were having a lot of those. Kairi busied herself slathering condiment on her bread.

Finally, Axel hummed, crossing his legs at the ankles. "So," he said deceptively casually and putting Kairi immediately on edge. "How've you been?"

Kairi eyed him over a slice of lunch meat. "Fine. Nothing's much changed, I guess."

The snort he made annoyed her. "I highly doubt that."

"And how would you know?" She shot back, because she was not above being petty with him. "It's been years and you didn't even realize."

He propped his chin in his hand. "Not my fault," he said, peering at her with those piercing green eyes that were far too observant for his own good. Even sitting down, he made her feel small. "You always looked older than you actually were."

She frowned down at a piece of lettuce. "Looked, maybe. Pretended to be." What else was she supposed to have done, when every one else around her seemed to know what they were doing? "Fat lot of good that did me."

He shook his head slightly, lips curved at the ends. "You sell yourself too short. If I had to compare you now to the Kairi then…" he paused, a hand raising to his chin. "Your hair was a bit shorter, then. Wore a little less black." His eyes lingered on her outfit, on the hoodie draped on her chair. At her scowl, he reached over and poked her cheek. "Smiled more often, too. But you were still always trying to take care of everyone. Trying to protect others." He crossed his arms on the table. "Doesn't seem like that's changed."

Hearing him say that was frankly embarrassing. She'd never been able to protect anyone. "I was naïve."

He smirked. "I'd call it sweet."

Her face flushed, equal parts flattery and annoyance. "You make me sound like a child," she said almost angrily.

"I'm not trying to." His eyes flicked between hers, face turning serious. "I admire that part of you. I'm wondering why you don't anymore."

3 Axel, 0 Kairi.

She looked away first, because there was just no response to that.

"Well at least you haven't changed," She muttered, slapping a piece of cheese a little too hard on her sandwich. "You're still annoying"

He opened his arms wide. "I do try."

"And you're so good at it."

"I'm good at everything, remember?" he said, and she rolled her eyes, fighting down a smile as she topped her finished sandwich. It was a monster looking thing, and Axel seemed very amused by it. She ignored him and took a big bite, resolutely staring at the wall.

"So what else has changed?" He started again.

She swallowed. "Nothing much."

"Right." He said, leaning back. "Except you're no longer traipsing across worlds or throwing magic spells at monsters on the regular. Going to school?"

She grunted, shaking her head.

"Boyfriend?" His eyes turned sly. "….Girlfriend?"

She glared.

He smirked. "How's your job, then?"

"Why are you interrogating me?" She said, annoyed, pointing at him with her sandwich. At his wounded look, she scowled. "Don't play dumb, I remember very well how you are."

He held up his hands, easing into that carefree smile he used when he was trying to placate someone. It never ceased to make her wary. "Just trying to get to know you."

"Or trying to find out things that are none of your business," she muttered, taking another large bite, then waving her hand around the room. "What you see is what you get. There isn't much else."

"Nothing, huh?" He examined his nails. "And the tattoo?"

She froze mid chew, eyes snapping up to his, before she realized there was no way he could know what he was talking about given what she was wearing. He was fishing.

Unfortunately, the damage was done. He sat up, eyes sparkling with interest. "So you do have one," he said, grinning.

He was worse then Selphie. She planted her socked foot on his knee and shoved. He would have toppled off the chair if he hadn't grabbed her table, making it rattle dangerously on its legs.

"No I don't," she muttered, for all the good that it did her, and stood up, sandwich all but crust in one hand. She elbowed him hard in the shoulder as she passed, ignoring his overdramatic grunt. "I'm going to bed. Come on, I'll show you the couch."

Her living room was simple. Just an enormous old grey couch she'd inherited from her parent's basement, a small coffee table she'd picked up for free on a street corner, and a TV that she'd had since she was a little girl.

Axel studied the barren room with a neutral expression on his face, eyes lingering on a stack of cardboard boxes hidden in a corner. She wish she'd at least thrown a blanket over them. "Quaint," he repeated softly, throwing her a smile.

Kairi willed the flush away, annoyed with herself. Selphie had told her multiple times she needed to get a rug or some throw pillows, but the suggestions had always sounded silly at the time. Now, though, she wondered why she hadn't at least hung up some paintings she'd gotten as gifts. She was also trying to remember if she'd changed the toilet paper in the bathroom or when was the last time she'd washed her spare sheets.

She chewed her lip. "Let me get you a blanket." She left him there and walked quickly into her room across from the kitchen, pulling her summer blanket down from the top shelf of her closet. On her way back out she grabbed her only other pillow off her bed. When she entered the living room again, she found Axel sprawled on her large couch, arms behind his head as he stared at her ceiling. Massive as the couch was, his ankles still hung over the edge.

She lingered near his socked feet, peering at him from behind her blanket and pillow. "Is it gonna work?" She asked hesitantly.

His green eyes flicked down, catching hers. Then he sat up, legs sliding to the ground. His smile was reassuring. "This is great. Thanks, Kairi."

Her name on his lips felt odd and almost intimate. She thrust the blankets at him. "Sorry. It's not a lot," she said, tucking loose hair behind her ear.

Axel grinned. "You know I've slept on far worse."

She paused, considering. "You did sleep on a rock once."

"A boulder," he corrected, of which she rolled her eyes because he always said that and it was a complete exaggeration. He leaned back on the couch again, the curve of his mouth soft. "Relax, Kairi. This is already far more than what I expected. Thanks for putting me up."

"And exactly what did you expect?" She raised an eyebrow. "That I'd just leave you on the streets?"

"You did try to run out on me," he pointed out.

"Only because I thought you were going to leave anyway." She rolled her eyes at his wince, shoulders relaxing. "If you need to hang around its, fine. This is no trouble at all. It's not like you're planning to stay for ever."

She realized only after that she'd said something she shouldn't. The flash of something across his face was too quick to identify, but the gentle smile that he gave her afterwards wasn't, nor the small chill down her spine.

"Right," he said, and she had a feeling they were having different conversations. And she didn't understand.

Lea was gentle. Not Axel.

"Good night, Princess," Axel said, his body fully relaxed yet his eyes so impenetrable that she was reminded sharply of her first memories of him on a beach, holding out his hand to her and calling her friend.

Maybe there were things she didn't know about this new Axel too.

"Good night," she whispered. And then, because she was still a coward when it came to him, she turned and walked away to her bedroom, closing the door softly behind her.


THEN

When she next opened her eyes, she was standing on a beach under the blinding light of a setting sun. Her Keyblade was gone. Merlin, the fairies and the room in Radiant Garden were gone. Instead there was an ocean, dyed orange and red from horizon to beach shoreline.

Familiar, achingly so. For a moment, she couldn't breathe for seeing it again.

"What do you know," Axel—Lea—Axel murmured from beside her, and she nearly recoiled at the nearness of his voice. "This crazy plan actually worked."

She didn't realize she was still tightly holding his hand until his grip loosened. She immediately snatched her hand to her chest, cheeks flushing.

White sand stretched endlessly on either side of them. In front of them lay the familiar silhouette of Destiny Islands that she both longed for and dreaded seeing at the same time. At least not like this, without the people that made it home in the first place.

Kairi squinted up the (infuriating) distance between their heights to see an odd smile on Axel's face as he contemplated the lapping waves. A smile that checked all the boxes except for the ones that really mattered. As shallow as a footprint washed away under the cerulean waves.

She watched him take a few steps away from her, crouching in the sand. She had no idea what he was looking at. When he looked up and stared at a particular spot over his shoulder, she got the feeling he was sensing something she didn't.

"We were just here," he murmured to himself, and Kairi stiffened. He didn't really mean them, now...he meant them then. Their past selves a year ago, on the eve of their first stupid meeting where he lied through his teeth that they were already friends and life as she remembered it changed forever.

Except it wasn't a year ago anymore, it was now. Axel's satisfied expression said as much.

It had worked. They were back. Again.

Kairi felt her head grow light, her heart beat ratcheting up. Standing on the beach, she was flooded with the memory that felt like yesterday—the taste of the ocean breeze, the hot sun on her burnt shoulder blades. Pluto's wagging tail, the warmth of his fur under her fingers. Axel's carefree smile, his empty placating words. And eventually...his grip on her wrist, always, her personal shackle.

She didn't want to be here. She didn't want to think about this or them or him or worse— all that came after. She had lost her mind committing to this crazy plan, returning here with the very person who had kidnapped her in the first place.

"—nothing's changed," Axel was saying, and something in Kairi snapped.

"Everything has changed," she said, pressing a hand to her chest, the skin of which felt tight and hot under her shirt.

He glanced at her from the corner of his eye, smile fading. His eyes darted down to her hand and she swallowed, a lump in her throat, fighting the sudden need to turn away, to disappear.

There was a tightness in his expression that she didn't understand— consternation? Impatience? Pity?—then his eyes rolled away from her and he just...shrugged. "You'll get used to it," he said cryptically, the corner of his mouth curling up again ever so slightly.

He might as well have said nothing at all, for all the comfort that brought her. And really why should he comfort her? Because he'd...he'd held her hand in the dark? Because for a second, she thought she'd felt camaraderie in that moment of terror?

Humiliation burned through her. Axel had been right about one thing: nothing had changed between them. Not what they had to do, not what he wanted, and not what she needed from him.

"I don't want to get used to it," she shot back, the back of her eyes prickling. "I'm not like you, Axel."

Annoyance flashed across his expression, his mouth opening as he pinned his viridian green eyes on her—and then she drew a sharp breath, cold trickling down her spine as it dawned on her suddenly.

He was the only one left.

There was no Merlin to buffer their odd silent treatment of each other. There were no Good Fairies that she could talk to when she was lonely. There was just her and Axel, in a place where they could change nothing or speak to no one, and they were all each other had.

Axel stopped. His eyes tracked over her face, and then all expression slipped from him. All that remained was the blank mask that honestly terrified her even more.

"Sorry," he murmured delicately, the way one might handle a knife delicately, eyes sliding away from her to the water—and she almost preferred the annoyance. At least it wouldn't sound as devoid of feeling as he looked.

It was too easy. Too easy to look at this man and only see the stranger she had met a year ago trying to destroy the person she cared for most. And ironically, Sora would have been so disappointed in her for not seeing past it.

Sora wasn't here though. Neither Sora or Riku had been around for a long time.

She turned her back on Axel and the island of her childhood both. "Right," she said shortly. "Let's just…let's just go."

His gaze was a small inferno on her back. No matter what nonchalance he affected she knew better—under that careless facade he was studying her, judging her, finding her wanting—and it just made her want to hide out of his sight. But a moment later he did as she asked. A dark portal opened up before her, its rim writhing with shadows, its depths impenetrable.

Kairi stared dully at the portal.

They had one year. One year to master the Keyblade without a real master to guide them. And if they failed—they would have to do this all over again. Travel to a different horrible memory they shared, fight to gain the power to protect the ones they loved, and try not to destroy their souls and hearts via paradox.

Because if they failed that—if they accidentally met their past selves on any of these roads…They would truly fade away. As if they had never existed in the first place.

"Well, Princess?" Axel said lowly as he strolled past her. She couldn't tell if he was being mocking or smug or just ironic. "You ready?

Master Yen Sid had warned her. And she had chosen this.

Taking a deep breath, Kairi followed after him. She didn't know where they were going… but it didn't matter, as long as it wasn't here.


NOW

She stumbled out of her bedroom to find Axel sitting at her kitchen table fully dressed, two cups of coffee steaming in front of him. He was staring lost in thought at the door of her refrigerator.

Her eyes drifted to the door to find a gift from her office white elephant two years ago— a set of those poetry tile word magnets that formed an amorphous cloud in the center of the fridge door. Selphie had opened the box after the party (explicitly against Kairi's permission, who'd wanted to regift it for next year) and entertained herself with it over several glasses of peppermint liquor while Kairi had been practically passed out in her chair from some overzealous imbibing of eggnog. A silly little gift and yet the words had just...stuck.

Currently the magnets spelled out in the center of her door were "oh empty fridge? despair"—the result of her feelings last week when she'd broken her last egg in the middle of making an omelette.

Kairi flushed, coughing. "Morning."

He looked up at her, eyes flitting over her tangled bed hair and her oversized pajamas with cartoonish chocobos chasing after clouds. His eyes crinkled. "Yo."

She willed down the blush as she moved to take the seat opposite him, warming her hands around the steaming coffee mug he'd clearly made for her. The best way to deal with Axel was to side step whatever he was trying to embarrass her about. "Did you sleep in that?" She asked, eying his heavy leather coat.

He shrugged. "Don't have anything else."

She took a sip of her coffee, made a face, then stood up to grab the sugar bowl from her counter and the creamer from the fridge.

"Don't drink it black?" He said, amused.

"Too acidic for me," She said, spooning two teaspoons of sugar and a couple dashes of milk. "Too bitter."

"Coffee is best black," he said, leaning back and draping an arm over his chair. "As black as the soul."

"Your soul, maybe," she retorted, taking a second sip of her coffee, then adding a bit more milk. "Speaking of which…" She spooned up some sugar and leaned over, dunking it into his cup and giving it a quick swirl.

Too late, Axel drew away, covering his mug with a hand. "Hey!"

"A little sweetness isn't going to kill you," She huffed.

After she'd settled down in her chair, they fell into silence. It wasn't comfortable exactly, but it wasn't awkward either. She watched him over the rim of her cup as he just sort of…stared vacantly, lost in thought. She remembered this about him from so long ago. For all that Axel was the very definition of a boisterous and loud extrovert, there were also times where he seemed too caught up in his own internal world to notice those around him.

Especially in the mornings. For all that he hid it well, he wasn't much of a morning person.

"So," she said eventually, feeling slightly bad when he stirred, blinking. "…you planning to hang around?"

His eyes flashed up to her at that. He looked about to say something, then his mouth twitched. His gaze returned to the fridge, oddly not meeting her eyes. "There maybe some heartless still around," he said.

She shrugged, taking another sip. "You can stay. As long as you need." When his gaze snapped back to her in surprise, she added. "If you don't mind the couch."

He mulled over that one for a long moment. Eventually, he said with a tentative smile, "I don't mind."

He took a sip of his coffee, then paused. The bewildered look on his face reminded her of what she'd done. She held out her hand guiltily. "Sorry. I can get you a new cup."

He stared at her, then looked back at his coffee. He didn't move to give it to her. "It's fine," He said, eyes catching hers contemplatively as he moved to take a second slow sip. "Just not used to it, that's all."