The Right Time.
Tonight was the night.
After years of heartache and longing and yearning, Mac was certain she was finally ready to give herself to Harm body and soul.
The last year hadn't exactly been kind to her. That stupid assignment to Paraguay had left her feeling bereft and out of sorts. Her relationship with Clayton Webb was toxic and left a hole inside of her that she feared would never close again.
It ended rather messily and was another notch in the long list of men she was involved with that she never really loved. Harm had been there, of course. His unwavering presence was even more pronounced the more she fought to keep him away. He held her when she cried, searched for answers about the illness that left her barren. He gave her options, none of which sounded appealing but one - that he no longer wished to be on the sidelines in regards to her.
Harm told her he loved her in no uncertain terms. It was on Christmas morning when he brought her home from the hospital and refused to leave her side. She felt battered and bruised and, in her opinion, looked terrible. Her face was bruised and swollen, it wasn't the kind of setting she imagined he'd use to open his heart to her.
She'd been mean to him, accusing of Harm only wanting her because he'd nearly lost her again. This time, he fought back.
Harm yelled. He detailed the last two years of his longing for her and took it back even farther. He paced her apartment like he was in court and met her rebuttal with one of his. He loved her. He just simply loved her and was tired of waiting.
And so she cried and he kissed her - a feat that hurt her aching face and wound up as a mere brush of his lips over hers. It was heartbreakingly sweet and Harm understood nothing more would happen for a while. "I'm in for the long haul, Sarah...Whatever it takes."
That had been two months ago and between counseling sessions and infinite time spent with Harm, Mac was ready.
They were practically living together. He spent more time at her apartment than his loft. Some of his clothes had found their way next to hers, his toothbrush was in her bathroom, his body wash in the shower. She needed them to be in a safe place emotionally before taking the next step and that had finally come.
He was working late which afforded her time to prepare. Candles were lit throughout the apartment, soft music played in the background. When she showered, it dawned on Mac that they'd been together longer than any of them thought.
Even between significant others, they were a couple hiding being a veil of friendship that most could see through. He was also the only good relationship she'd ever known.
It was as if they were married in a way, joined at the hip from the second he took her hand in a rose garden. They'd always done coupley things for one another: back rubs, coffee breaks just so she could see him. Mac would bring him oatmeal if he skipped breakfast, Harm would show up with a Snickers bar if she had a rough case. Working dinners weren't. completely about work - they shared personal experiences, memories much as if they'd been dating without realizing it.
The last few years had been something of an angsty type of foreplay which finally led to this. Mac wanted to be ready and she was ready now.
She wanted him to kiss her like lovers do. She yearned to feel his naked body molding against hers. She wanted the right to touch him uninhibited and watch his blue eyes turn stormy. She wanted to be flat on her back, in the center of her mattress with him on top, moving in and out of her. She wanted to be on top of him, watching his expressions as she rode him. She wanted to taste him, wanted to feel his mouth on her. She wanted that sweet, satisfied ache between her thighs. She wanted to wake up in the morning and make love until they were late for work. She wanted to lose herself in him.
She wanted to love him. She wanted him to know just how much she loved him. She just wanted him.
The ginger and lavender infused water made the bathroom smell heavenly and despite an array of sexy underthings in her top drawer, Mac simply wore a short, silk kimono.
It was a fiery red with intricate patterns and came to mid thigh and not a stitch of clothing was underneath it. She put on makeup and immediately took it all off because she knew he'd appreciate her fresh face look. Her long hair was down, the curly tendrils touching her shoulders that were bare because she pushed the kimono down some.
She wasn't an unattractive woman but the way she looked when glancing at a mirror took her own breath away. He would like this.
And so when he knocked on the door twenty minutes later, she nearly ran for it - her heart hammering in anticipation and excitement.
It all came to a screeching halt. "What in the hell happened to you?"
"Hey." He smirked and sighed deeply. Harm was a mess. His forehead had a gash which was only held together by four butterfly bandages. Blood was matted onto his hair and skin. His uniform shirt was a rumpled mess and droplets of blood had ruined the front. Harm held his jacket in one hand, his briefcase in the other and looked so worse for wear that she mildly thought he'd lost a battle with Tyson.
"Car accident." He finally explained when Mac pulled him inside and pushed him onto her sofa. She was using a bottle of peroxide and cotton swabs to dabble on all of the scratches the paramedics didn't clean.
That made her stop. Flashes of her own terrible wreck still kept her up sometimes. Mac was sure she would die until the crews pulled her from the wreck she shouldn't have survived.
"I'm okay, Mac." He knew what she was thinking, how fate would cruelly make them both suffer. "The other person is also okay. They ran the four way stop near the office. The one time I didn't wear a seatbelt. Heh."
His head hit the steering wheel and Harm was lucky he hadn't broken his nose. The cuts on his forearms and hands were from his window shattering. "Oddly enough none of the airbags blew. I'm just glad it wasn't the 'Vette, I would have cried."
"Why don't you shower and change? I'll order pizza."
"Mac." He was looking at her funny as if he just noticed the setting he was in. The kimono was far up in her thigh, indecently so as she sat next to him and cleaned another cut. Harm saw the candles, heard the soft music and cursed the other driver that caused the wreck. It wasn't going to be a normal night for them and he lamented ruining whatever she had in mind. "I need a raincheck...my head hurts, my body feels like it was run over by an F14 at Mach 3. I'm so sorry….It's never the right time for us, is it?"
"One day it will be. I'm sure of it." She flipped the cap on the bottle of peroxide and motioned to her bedroom. "Shower. Change of clothes. Pizza. Sleep."
"Aye aye ma'am."
Harm walked into her bedroom which always felt forefin no matter how many times he crossed that threshold and used her bathroom. He always slept in the spare on the uncomfortable bed that was far too small for him. He never complained because sharing mornings with her, no matter how friendly and mundane everything was to him.
There were candles there too, lovely smelling ones and her bed no longer had it's comforter, just the pale blue sheets and four fluffy pillows. She could have been his tonight. He could have slipped that kimono off knowing she was nude underneath and...and...and...His head throbbed at the thought. Damn.
Dejectedly he took a shower, the cold kind and winced as his skin protested. He was quick about it and when he came back out with a towel wrapped around his waist a bout of dizziness made him sit down on the bed. It was soft and cozy and smelled of her. So what if he crawled into the middle and lay down? So what if he plucked a pillow, buried his nose in it and eventually dozed off cradling it in his arms?
And that's how Mac found him. After blowing out the candles she'd been concerned he was taking too long and walked into her bedroom to find him fast asleep on her bed. He wasn't sleeping fitfully and out of an abundance of concern Mac lay next to him watching as he slept.
Harm woke only because the daylight filtered in through a gap in the drap. He lay on his back opening his eyes to find a smooth white ceiling and not the rafters of his loft. He felt good, a little sore from the wreck but good and rested. A sheet had been draped over.him and upon turning his head to the side he found Mac sleeping soundly.
She was on her side, back to him and still wore that red kimono that had shifted enough for him to see her bare back and shoulder. Carefully, he scooted closer, draped an arm over her middle and settled himself against her so that his chest was flush against her back.
Lord it felt good to hold her this way and although they didn't sleep together in the biblical sense, he felt content - whole - like all of the scattered pieces of his heart finally fit together again. He closed his eyes and began to doze off again until three softly spoken words cut through the comfortable silence.
"I love you." Mac said. "I've always, always loved you no matter who came or went. It's always you. It will always be you." She turned slightly, enough so that her lips could touch his. It was a kiss that he deepend and when Mac turned in his arms, the evidence of his intense passion for her pressed against her belly.
"I love you too, Sarah."
"I know." She took one hand and guided his fingers to uncinch the loosely tied kimono. She enjoyed watching his eyes go nearly black. She enjoyed hearing him moan when the silk fell away exposing naked flesh. "I want you. I want to be with you."
"Oh Mac." Harm's mouth lavished her breasts, his fingers moved slowly down her body until he found her center. She leaned back against the pillows and each ministration on her body made her writhe from uninhibited passion.
His name on her lips was the sweetest sound Harm had ever heard. And his fantasies came to life when Mac sat up and let the kimono fully drop off her body. She was stunning and the real thing made his dream girl come to life.
Mac pulled the towel off his lap that had barely concealed his impressive length. He shuttered when she touched him and when her hand took his weight he was a lost, lost man. "See what you do to me?" He smirked when a thumb moved over the tip and its built up moisture. "I'm crazy about you, Sarah."
"Show me."
She lay back against the pillows and saw that sexy flyboy grin curve his lips. Her legs spread as her final invitation and when he kneeled between her parted thighs Mac knew there was no going back. His dark gaze held hers as he guided himself into her sweet lock, slowly parting her folds as she opened for him.
He was big and thick, each inch that she took of him was a sweet type of torture until he felt her tightness ease. "It's been a while." He confessed and his cheeks tainted a lovely shade of pink, an endearing quality Mac always found in him. A man who blushed, none of her lovers ever did and it was an impetus that made him that more special.
"You're doing pretty good so far."
"I'm not hurting you?"
"No. You feel so good...really, really good." Her hands reached out to touch him, to move down his chest and slip around his flank. She pulled at him, needing Harm's body to cover hers. "Love me, Harm."
Hips pressed into her, his length slid with some resistance deep inside her. Mac gasped when he began to move, shallow thrusts turning to deeper, demanding ones. God, she felt good too. With each squeeze of her body, greedily milking him, not letting him stop.
Mac was holding his gaze, the passion in her eyes not letting him look away. And when she felt that he was done, when her body began to quiver around him, she placed her hands on either sides of his face and brought him down so that she could kiss him.
His hard thrusts calmed some, his pelvis grinded against hers and she held him tightly in her sweet lock. It hadn't felt like this with any other women, that warmth that spread between them, a wavelength that couldn't be broken. He was lost in her and the intoxication of pleasure and love.
Harm was humbled by her, the beautiful woman that had finally chosen to be with him. "I love you." He said, punctuating the words with kisses, thrusting with fierceness as she begged for more and more from him.
Mac's body clamped down on his and that exquisite heat of pleasure spread through her, enough that she pulled him down onto her so that his chest flattened her breasts. She wanted that weight of his heavy frame pressing her into the mattress, she wanted to feel his warmth spread inside her. And so her legs came up high on his waist, her arms wrapped around him. She didn't let him pull out until he spent himself within her.
When he came he said her name - Sarah - and it sounded wild and wonderful and perfect. Absolutely perfect in that deep tone, the sesuanlly induced tone that made her tremble beneathe him.
Mac wasn't sure if she passed out or fell asleep or both. When she woke she lay in his arms, snuggled against his body las if they'd always been like this. She felt his lips press a kiss on her shoulder, the hand over her hip dipping downward until he reached between her thighs and buried them in her curls. She laughed at his enthusiasm and when her thighs parted even slightly, Harm pushed into her from behind.
They rocked gently against each other, a simple act of making love that took her breath away. And when the morning came the lovers would start a new life...together.
