CHAPTER 5:
A couple of weeks later, Meade and Mode magazine's operations had slowly began to return to normal with the exception of Daniel and Wilhelmina's relationship. After working together to push Cal out of Meade, it became extremely hard for them to pretend they hated each other. Instead of being at each other throats, the pair was actually attempting a normal working relationship, sharing responsibilities instead of wasting time by attending every single meeting together, afraid what the other might do or say to the advertisers. They spent the entire first week going through the company's finances and budgets, brainstorming and short listing ways to get Meade Publications back to its former glory. They'd also met with advertisers back to back, reassuring them of the return of their full creative control of Mode and Meade Publications.
The pair sat together in Wilhelmina's office after hours with over a dozen spreadsheets in front of them. They've spent the previous hour and a half putting their capital allocation plans in motion, devising budgets of the publications.
"Wilhelmina, you're a genius." Daniel said out of the blue as he transfixed his gaze on the folder in his hands.
"Of course, I am." She answered quickly. She paused and furrowed her brows "About what?" Daniel chuckled softly,
"About this idea of getting these magazines started up again."
"Yeah, I did the math. Even though the economy is kind of shitty, they will be able to generate profit." She replied.
"Plus everybody being on payroll. It's amazing."
"Those are well deserved raises. Happy staff is productive stuff."
"Got that right." He said.
"Hey, don't you think we should get some new media kits for Mode?"
"Do we need them?" He asked.
"Of course, I mean they would spice up the magazine since we just go out of a dark cloud. I just think Mode needs some revival." She suggested.
"You're right. You're absolutely right." He glanced at his watch "It's getting late."
"If you want to go, you may. I can finish up on my own." She said with her attention back on her computer.
"You should go too. We can finish up tomorrow."
"I have a lot to do tomorrow, Daniel. The book was submitted and I need to do redlining and sort press ready files."
"Willie c'mon, you need to slow down." He said, his voice showing concern. She only scoffed as his suggestion.
"Excuse me? I don't have time to slow down. I'm working almost twice as hard since I don't have a completely reliable assistant."
"You still don't have an assistant? I thought Amanda…"
"Amanda's phone skills are impressive but I'm not so sure about her secretarial skills. It's not that I don't trust her or anything, it's just that I'm sort of a perfectionist when it comes to the magazine and I can't rely on her for major things. Her attention is all over the place." She explained.
"Well, it sounds like you don't trust her." Daniel teased.
"Shut up." She snapped jokingly, trying to hold back a laugh.
"Hey, do you wanna grab a drink?" He asked.
"Twice on the same day? Aren't people going to get the wrong idea?" She asked lifting her brow. Daniel chuckled.
"C'mon we only went out to lunch to discuss business. Besides, since when do you care what people think?" That, he was right about and before she could refuse, a somewhat heartbreaking look of desperation crossed his face. And she felt for him.
"You're right. Let me just tidy this up and I'll be on my way."
"Great."
At about an hour later, the pair sat in a booth in a slightly enigmatic bar in Williamsburg that Wilhelmina had no idea existed. She was on her second martini and Daniel's first snakebite was still almost full. Since they arrived they were chatting about work, basically continuing their conversion from earlier at office.
"Thanks." Daniel said smiling.
"For?"
"Doing this with me. Back at the office, I could tell you were reluctant. So, thanks."
"You're welcome."
"It used to be Betty who was my friend and companion. If I needed to talk, she'd be there. Even if I didn't want to talk about it, she'd be there whether it would be a pep talk or to tell me that I can win in whatever fight you and I would be having or scheme you were perpetrating." She gave a short suppressed giggle.
"And now she's too busy to baby you?" She teased.
"I know she's not my assistant anymore. I know she still cares, but…"
"Daniel, I'm not saying this to come between you and Betty, I'm saying it to help you understand her. Betty doesn't have a job anymore, she has a CAREER. You're still best friends but she is an editor now and it's a dog-eat-dog kind of world at Mode. She has to work at being on top of her game all the time. And that's going to be hard if she has to make a friend's personal life her first priority."
"No, I understand. I'm very happy for her but…things are not the same anymore."
"You know sometimes when things change, they become different and they're just not the same anymore." Willie said in an attempt to cheer him up. And that she did because, he responded with a laugh. "Things between you two are going to get better with time." She assured.
"I hope so. It's been stressful lately."
"Did you go to therapy?" She enquired.
""I went 3 days ago actually. It was my first session. He penciled me down for 5 more."
"Did it help in any way?"
"I don't know, Willie. It's hard to talk about it. I just…I miss her." He said softly.
"That's understandable, it's still early not to. Have you been sleeping, though?"
"Surprisingly, after our talk at the Bahamas, I have been sleeping. Your words really got to me. 'You should try and deal with grief rather than try to replace it.' I just…I wish it was that easy to do."
"It's not. Dealing with emotional pain is hard. Time is your only friend, Daniel. Grief comes in many stages and…"
"Stages?"
"Yes, there are a lot of stages of grief we go through and we skip some and we dwell on some. But we all go through them in our own different way. You're still in that stage where you want to choke every single person who says it's going to be fine." Daniel's brows shot up at her explanation.
"You've had that feeling before?"
"Far too many times than I'd like to admit. People tell you that you'll get through it as if they know what you're going through." She said slowly shaking her head.
"I just want to punch them in the face every time I hear that 'Everything is gonna be okay.' speech."
"You know what pisses me off more? It's when the people who claim to care about you act like you don't have a right to be angry. Like you can't break things, throw them around. Like your behavior is not normal…that you can't react. Sometimes shedding tears isn't enough…sometimes you just need a release, you know, before it really sinks in…that…" She trailed off looking down, trying to mask her emotions.
"That the person you love and planned the rest of your life with is gone." He finished.
"Exactly. And then they send you to therapy because they can't handle you at your worst. That pisses me off because there is no right or wrong way to grieve."
"So it's okay to ask 'Why me?' and throw shit around?"
"Very much so. And it is healthier than being in denial for 12 years…like me." She admitted.
"12 years?"
"I know I'm a bitch from hell and everybody hates me but…I wasn't always like this. It's just that, I was in denial for far too long that I kept losing a part of who I was throughout the years without even realizing it. I attempted to deal with it but it was too late. I had already changed to the wicked witch with no feelings. But I still don't understand."
"What?"
"I mean, I wasn't America's sweetheart or 'Betty-nice' but I was a decent human being. And for the life of me I still can't understand what I did so wrong back then that God thought I deserved something like that. I try…I just can't." She looked down and spaced out, staring in the distance. Daniel placed his hand rested it atop of hers and that shook her from her thoughts.
"Sorry, I'm making this about me." She apologized.
"Nonsense. I brought you here so we could talk and I'm glad that you told me that you're still dealing." He said quietly.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to…I don't mean to scare you. You will make peace with Molly's death. Like they say, time heals all wounds. It's just that… A child's death is different from a spouse's."
"I understand. I've been reading on the internet and they say losing a child is far worse. And with you, your husband and son died on the same day."
"Yeah…Now please can we stop talking about…them? Please. Let's just…drink. But you can tell me all about Molly." Daniel just smiled in response.
"Waiter!" He called out and signaled to the waiter who rushed over.
"Is everything alright, sir?" Asked the waiter.
"Yeah, we'd like more drinks."
"Okay what would you and your lady like sir?" He asked looking at Wilhelmina
"I'd like another snakebite, please." Daniel answered. The waiter looked to Willie
"Do you perhaps have a sazerac?" She enquired.
"Of course ma'am."
"Bring us six tumblers….and some shots of Absolut vodka, 8 of them. Thanks." Said Willie.
"Coming right up." The waiter replied and walked off. Daniel eyed her suspiciously cocking his eyebrows, she only flashed him a mischievous smirk.
"Daniel, please don't look at me like that. We have a town car." Daniel let out a laugh. He was really liking this Wilhelmina.
A couple of days later the pair was sitting in Wilhelmina's living room with the book on the coffee table, going through press ready files. Daniel had also ordered dinner for the two of them and was devouring his stake as they worked harmoniously. They seemed to agree that some layouts needed to be changed, as well as the negative space of the layouts. Strangely, working on the book took them less time than it used to; they were settling their disagreements in a civilized manner as of late and there was compromise involved regarding their tastes and opinion.
"This is strange." Daniel said after a while.
"What is?" She asked as she dabbed her mouth with the napkin.
"We've been working on the book and we've managed to come to agreements like civilized human beings."
"Now that you mention it." She said with a small smile after coming to that realization.
"So, why do you always disagree with me?"
"Because sometimes you're an idiot and most of the ideas you come up with or support are stupid." She simply replied eliciting a small chuckle from Daniel "But, that's been happening a lot less lately."
His excitement peaked following her confession "Yeah?"
"You're getting better at this editing business." She admitted, looking him in the eye.
"Thank you. Is that why you… never mind." He stopped himself as he didn't wish to get kicked out.
"Go on, say it." She challenged as she narrowed her eyes.
"Is that why you always shot down my ideas? Because you were threatened that I was getting better?" He asked causing her to scoff.
"Not at all, believe it or not I don't mind sharing the spotlight. And just to clarify, I am not threatened by you…in any way." She said rather calmly.
"Okay" He replied smirking skeptically at her.
"Daniel, do you know why I was pissed at you for so long? It wasn't because you were a threat, it was because you were given this job on a silver platter after I worked and earned that promotion and that made me angry at Bradford. But what pissed me off the most to the point of almost hating you was that you didn't even try. For two whole years you never tried. You used your power to lure more women into your bed and Betty was the one who saved your ass day in and day out." She explained in a gentle tone. All the while Daniel's grin disappeared slowly.
"I see….I'm sorry."
"Don't be. You were longing for your father's approval. Trust me I know how that's like."
"I'm not just sorry for not trying but also about accepting a job which you rightfully earned. You're right, for two years I've taken credit for work that wasn't even mine."
"It's okay. I kind of like you now so…let's put it behind us." She proposed to a now flattered Daniel who was still taken aback by her admission that she liked him.
"Refill?" Asked Willie picking up the wine bottle.
"Yeah…So, how's that island of yours working out?" Daniel asked as she filled the large glasses to the brim.
"I'm still looking. But I've just closed escrow on a penthouse and a private jet." She said with a hint of excitement.
"You really weren't kidding about that…wait, you're leaving this place?" He asked as his brows knitted in confusion.
"I think it's time. I've been in this place for 15 years. I raised Nico here…actually I didn't do much raising since her dad and I split. And with Connor and William…I just… the point is…I need a change of scenery. I need a clean slate."
"Now I hear you. You know I thought I could live in Molly's apartment for a while after her passing but…I can't. I'm also looking for a place. I've been living at this loft in SoHo for about 7 weeks now."
"I'm not really surprised. Very few people can pull it off."
"What?"
"Continuing their lives in a place they shared with a deceased spouse." She clarified.
"You also couldn't do it?"
"God, no. The memories are just too…It's just too depressing when you're used to going home to a family, when a house is a home and then suddenly it's not. It's too damn painful when you get home in a place where there used to be laughter, voices, love and all of a sudden it's just…silence."
He knew the feeling well. Now Daniel wasn't a strong believer in fate before that evening; however, things started to fall into place. Maybe Wilhelmina's presence at the bar at the Bahamas and the little friendship they had now developed all happened for a reason. She was by far the only person who knew what he was going through and cared to listen instead of sending him to therapy groups. As he sat there, he thought maybe it was time to cease being secretly mad at his Mom and Betty and start appreciating the one friend who understood him better, no matter how twisted the friendship may be perceived.
Initially, since Meade was still on the rebound, it wasn't strange that the heads of the company and Editors-in-Chief were spending a little more time together than usual. However, as the weeks flew by the change in the pair's behavior was beginning to gain notice around the office; Creative meetings seemed to go smoothly and even though there were a few disagreements between them, Wilhelmina didn't shoot a single insult to Daniel in front of the staff. She was her usual authoritative self, ordering people around, but since the Bahamas she hadn't made a single employee cry, and during the latest meeting, the pair agreed with each other to a point of finishing each other's sentences, causing a mass confusion among the Mode employees.
Following the meeting, Amanda went back to her desk to type some documents as instructed by Wilhelmina. While the girl was pretty competent as her temporary assistant, she had a weakness; listening to private phone conversations and today was no different. As soon as Willie's office phone rang she picked up the receiver and listened discretely.
"Hello?" Answered Wilhelmina.
"Wilhelmina." Came Daniel's voice.
"Daniel, Hey, is everything alright?"
"I think I might have left my watch at your place last night."
"Oh? Where exactly do you think you left it?" Willie questioned.
"We were on the couch and I took it off and maybe…"
"I'll look for it and give it to you tonight when we…" Amanda's mouth gaped open in shock and she put the receiver down before she could hear more. She shot up from her and ran as fast as she could to find Marc and she found him near the features offices.
"Marc!" She gasped upon reaching him.
"Mandy?"
"You evil queen!" She said slapping his arm.
"What? What did I do?"
"How could you not tell me?" She asked.
"Tell you what?"
"That your former boss and current boss are doing it?" She replied with a smirk.
"What? My former…boss doing it with who?" He asked confusedly.
"Wilhelmina and Daniel are doing the nasty." She blurted.
Scrunching up his face, he asked, "What?"
"I suspected something for a while. Remember when I told you that there's sexual tension between them?"
"Mandy, that was two years ago and I don't think it was sexual tension, I think it was just… tension."
"Marc, since the Bahamas, Daniel and Wilhelmina have been inseparable. They get along at meetings…and…"
"They've been working together to get rid of Hartley." He reasoned.
"Well, it looks like that's not all they've been working on. They've also been working each other and not only did they get rid of Cal Hartley, they've also been getting rid of their sexual tension." She said wriggling her brows.
"Mandy! They're just…"
"The daily lunches…working late together….alone…." She trailed off.
"Mandy, I don't think…."
"And to top it off, I just listened in to Wilhelmina's conversation on the phone. Daniel left HIS watch at HER place last night when THEY were on the couch and she said she'll give it back to him tonight."
"Oh my God." Marc said, his eyes widening in horror.
"OMG Indeed."
"Secret sex room, Immediately." Marc said as he linked their arms together.
Betty's eyes remained as wide as saucers as the two friends walked away. They weren't aware that she was nearby and that she heard every single word. And it finally made sense. She tried talking to Daniel and asked how he was doing day in an day out and he was almost in a better mood and it dawned on her that Wilhelmina hadn't been mean to her or any other employee in a while.
"Oh, my God." She whispered.
After trying unsuccessfully to forget about what she heard and focus on her work, Betty gave up; she couldn't take it anymore. She stood up and walked to Daniel's office. She needed to find out from him. She knocked on his door frame which led him to look up immediately.
"Betty!" He exclaimed.
"Daniel."
"Is everything alright?" He asked at seeing her troubled expression.
"It's just…we haven't talked much lately." She said as she slowly made her way towards his desk.
"Yeah, you're right we've been like ships passing through the night. It's been kind of crazy."
"So I've heard." She mumbled.
"What?"
"Daniel, are you sleeping with Wilhelmina?"
"What?" Daniel exclaimed in utter shock at the accusation.
"Daniel, ever since the Bahamas…"
"Wilhelmina and I were working together to get rid of Hartley." He said defensively.
"But you're still pretty close for people who were working on a one time deal." Betty said softly, yet accusatively.
"We are business partners and we decided to stop fighting and act like BUSINESS PARTNERS for a change. We realized that we would lose business if we carried on the way we were."
"What about your lunches together? You at her apartment last night, leaving your watch?"
"How do you know about me being at her apartment? Are you spying on me?" He said shooting up from his chair in aggravation.
"No!"
"So how? Is Marc listening to my phone conversations and spreading them around?"
"No, no it wasn't him."
"We were finalizing layouts and doing prepress for the book because we had back to back separate meetings and we needed to make our final notes and sign off on press ready files."
"What about you going out tonight?"
"We have dinner with the Donna Karan reps since we lost advertising when Hartley was around. This dinner is to convince them that we're back in power and in charge."
"Oh." She simply replied.
"Betty, Wilhelmina and I are just friends, okay?" He said at seeing her skeptical expression.
"Friends? With her?"
"She's not the devil everybody assumes she is. She has her problems like the rest of the world."
"But, Daniel friends?...with her? Really?"
"Betty, I'm friends with you and there's nothing…"
"Well, I don't exactly look like I just stepped out of the cover of the magazine but she does. And you have a weakness for…"
"STOP. Don't you dare accuse me of being that same guy because I'm not and that's something you have failed to see when you told me hook up with strangers at the Bahamas because you thought being a man-whore again will provide some therapy. Now if I found friendship with Wilhelmina or anybody else who understands what I'm going through, it shouldn't be your business. Not anymore!" He bellowed.
"Daniel…"Betty said, obviously hurt.
"Betty, you don't run my life anymore. Focus on your career like you've been doing for the past 3 months. Now if you'll excuse me, I have a business dinner to get to." He said and swiftly walked over to his coat hanger. Hurt by his outburst and accusation, Betty stormed out of his office in frustration.
"Betty…" He softly called out apologetically but she didn't stop.
Following the closing of one of their biggest advertising deals, the pair chatted casually while walking down the sidewalk. During the dinner with the Donna Karan representatives, they managed to sell themselves and convinced them of how things were back in their hands and by the end of the first course, they had them eating out of the palm of their hand. By the end, they were assured a three year advertising deal and all that was left to do was the finalization of the contracts by the end of the week.
"That was awesome." Daniel said jovially.
"Tell me about it. Now all we have to do is get Cavalli and Versace on board for their advertising contracts."
"And our ad sales will be through the roof!" He exclaimed, raising his hand for a high five. Wilhelmina just rolled her eyes at him. "C'mon" Daniel said, almost childlike and she gave up and high-fived him back which sent them giggling.
"You wanna know something?" He spoke as they laughter died down.
"What?"
"When I started at Mode, I thought Cavalli was food…some type of pasta or something." Wilhelmina responded with a chortle.
"Are you serious?"
"Dead serious." She laughed some more, throwing her head back causing him to smile broadly. That moment quickly became the cutest thing he'd ever seen from her. He'd always thought of her as pretty, sexy, devious, evil, but never associated the word 'cute' with her.
"You should tell that to Roberto some time. It might help break the ice." She suggested.
"Yeah, he doesn't like me very much." She didn't say anything to his statement because she knew how true it was.
"Pardon me for saying, Daniel, but even though you handled the meeting pretty well, I could tell something was bothering you."
"It's Betty. We had a fight." He stated.
"Oh? Not that I'm gonna lose sleep over it but what was it about?"
"No, I don't want you to get upset."
"Try me."
"She…I don't know where she heard it from, but she thinks there's something going on between us."
"What kind of thing?" Daniel only stared at her eyes, giving her a look "Oh…I hope you told her that she's losing it. Where did she get that theory, anyway?"
"Well, she heard that I left my watch at your place and did the math, thinking us working together was…you know. I don't know how she…"
"Amanda." Willie said, cutting him off.
"Amanda?"
"She thinks I don't notice, but she listens to my conversations on the phone. She probably jumped from her seat the moment she heard the words 'watch' and 'apartment' and ran to Marc or Betty or both."
"Oh"
"And you had a fight which I assume based on your mood tonight is unresolved. Now my question is…Why didn't you just tell her that there isn't anything going on between us?"
"I did and she didn't believe me and then brought up the fact that I can't control myself around women like you." Her eyebrow shot up at that statement.
"Women like me? What does that mean?"
"You know…beautiful women. She thinks I'm gonna…you know…"
"But Daniel, you're not that guy anymore. You haven't been in a while."
"I know. But Betty can't seem to see it. In the Bahamas, I wanted to hook up with that girl because she told me to go back to who I was. Even though she was the type I would normally sleep with, I realized that…It's not about looks anymore."
"Excuse me?" Willie exclaimed melodramatically.
"I'm serious, Willie. I mean, it used to be; I went out or slept with women because of their looks, no matter how dumb they are. My longest relationship was 5 months and 1 week long and she was a vapid, annoying gold digger but she was pretty so I let it slide and among my friends I was the man."
"Awww, Danny boy's growing up." She teased earning a chuckle from him. Their chuckles died down and as Daniel was about to speak and ask her to join him for celebratory drinks, her blackberry beeped announcing a message. She took it out of her purse and read the message.
Are we still on 4 drinks 2nite?
She rolled her eyes, her lips curving into a small smile. It was one of her fuck buddies. She'd been seeing quite a few of them shortly after Connor took the company's money. But ever since Nico's betrayal, she had been with a different man every single night. Daniel was walking right beside her and she didn't hide the message that was displayed on the screen. She checked her watch and texted her 'friend' back immediately, not really caring that Daniel was watching. Finally she stopped in front of their town car.
"I believe we are officially done for the evening. We can talk more about the Donna Karan contract tomorrow." Said Daniel awkwardly as they reached their town car.
"Oh, yeah we can set up a meeting for later this week. Uh…you can take the town car, I'll hail a cab."
"No, Wilhelmina…" He began to protest.
"Daniel, it's totally fine. I insist."
"I also insist."
Thankfully, a cab stopped by a few feet away dropping somebody off. That seemed to put an end to their little fun game of 'I insist'.
"Goodnight, Daniel." She said walking over to the waiting cab wearing a broad grin on her face. There was that cuteness again, Daniel thought. She waved goodbye before sliding in the cab, to meet her friend for the night. Daniel waved back and watched as the cab pulled away while suddenly overwhelmed with an inexplicable stab of jealousy.
