Sakura rubbed her burning eyes, pinching the bridge of her nose. The screen blared with blue light, her mouse hovering over another half-finished report, but she couldn't concentrate on that any longer.
The light had been replaced with swirls of darkness the harder she rubbed her eyes until she effectively put out any color from view. She wasn't in the office anymore, and with an exasperated sigh, she remained frozen with her eyes closed cherishing the temporary escape.
There was no one around her anymore, the edge of her oncoming headache completely disappeared. She was finally all alone with just her thoughts and it felt blissful.
If she just relaxed more, enough to focus her energy on getting away, she could see the ocean. Her mouth felt salty, the breeze sanding her cheeks and she could hear voices. Her hands were smaller here. Her head, especially her forehead, was probably too big but she had been happy here. This had been her happy place once upon a time.
Unfortunately, fairy tales didn't come true for Sakura. There was sorrow in this memory, but it was the only memory she could remember of her parents.
Despite all three of them being on vacation on the beach, it had been a gloomy day. Her parents, ever the optimists and workaholics had promised to spend some time together and the Harunos wasn't going to let a little rain ruin their day.
Sakura recalled her father playfully pulling her mother into the freezing water, their laughter echoing all around together. She was also pulled into the water for a family hug, getting her hair wet in the process, but she didn't care as she watched her dad tenderly kiss her mother. There was true love and passion in that one kiss and just for a second, the world stopped to grant them this moment.
Then the rain started, and they all ran giggling out of the water as they hear thunder. It had been a memorable day, one that ended with them lodging in a hotel near the shore. Coffee in each of their hands, chocolate for her, as they reminisced about their adventures.
But she learned the hard way that nothing could ever be perfect as everything went downhill from there.
The hotel they stayed at had been attacked. The police report she had found years later claimed that it had been a robbery gone wrong with her parents, the only family she knew, caught in the crossfire. They had lost their lives along with the attendants and everyone else who had the misfortune of staying in that place that night.
Everyone except her.
She had been the only survivor. Her father had hidden her in the cupboard and ordered her to be quiet and not come out no matter what she heard. Her hands had twitched, she had fought with herself to stay put choosing to listen to her dad instead of the little voice in her head.
A lot had changed for her that day besides becoming an orphan. Her inner voice had been replaced with the sound of the gunshots that still rang in her head till this day. And the police report had been vetoed for the truth; her parents had been targeted that night.
"Aren't you squinting a little too hard over there?" Ino barely managed to say between chuckles until she couldn't hold it in anymore and bellowed in laughter, one hand clutched over her abdomen.
Sakura opened her eyes with a roll before flinging a pen at the blonde's head who continued to laugh her heart out.
"Oh stop, you're overreacting," Sakura huffed, propping her head on her open palm in boredom. "Aren't you sick of all this office work Ino?"
That made Ino stop dead in her tracks and seriously stare at her best friend.
"We should've been promoted years ago," Sakura replied her head sliding to hit the desk with a loud thud, "Instead we're stuck here doing office work!"
Ino scowled, her hand thumping on the desk to effectively capture Sakura's attention and break her from her depressingly moody state she was moping in.
"You think I don't know that?" Ino replied a frown covering her own face. "Do you know how many times I didn't stop to think that I could be catching bad guys out on the field like a real operative such as my dad? But at least I'm not whining about it like a baby."
"I know what you're doing," Sakura chided back with an accusing finger. "You're trying to knock some sense into me, but I'm just so tired of waiting. Tsunade herself trained us and here we are, washing away with the knowledge we know."
"Actually, she trained you. I just sat there watching," Ino mumbled in the background typing away on her computer as Sakura continued droning on.
"I learned how to rip out a heart without making a bloody mess when I was eight for crying out loud!" Sakura said unaware that her listening buddy had begun to drown out considering she had already ranted this same speech to her for the past two months.
"That's because you specialized in medicine," Ino replied as if she heard this sentence every other day – which thanks to Sakura, she had. "If you had specialized in psych then it would be torture methods you'd be screaming in my ear right now."
"We are more than ready to become filed operatives." Sakura continued rambling, "Even Naruto is already on the field. I don't see why we're stuck finishing their reports."
Ino sighed, giving up on work for today by pushing her hair out of her face and slumped into her chair. Her hand began to mimic Sakura's every word coming from her mouth.
"Anything is better than working back office. I never imagined I would be sitting at my desk filling out forms for the past two years. I practically know every mission statement by heart and every question asked like the back of my hand. Even some of my agent's answers are so similar I can always guess what they put down next."
Ino shook her head, "Everyone starts from the bottom, until Tsunade thinks we're ready."
"Which we are! Everyone else our age had already been cleared to go on missions," Sakura countered plastering her head back into her hands with a frustrated sigh. "I'd rather be training than sitting here ruining my eyesight."
"We're already trained. That's why we're here on standby Sakura." Ino replied placing a comforting hand on her friend's desk, "You know that. I know that."
Sakura screamed into her hands, creating a muffled noise and stared at her best friend in defeat.
"We're not like everyone else our age. We grew up in the system, birthed with the skill set not attainable to others. Plus, as much as I hate to admit it, we're sitting all nice and pretty in the air conditioning because those in charge care a little too much about us. We're not expendable." Ino continued as she stood on her feet and walked over to Sakura's desk. She placed both her hands on the back of Sakura's chair and twirled her around, caging her in so she could listen to what Ino had to say.
"Even Naruto is an exception for finding a mentor in the field program wiling to train him personally and get Tsunade to agree to let him go on his first mission. You know the details. If he failed, he would've never been allowed to ever go on any missions ever again. That's how much Tsunade was against the idea but he had a mentor whom she owed a favor to. We don't. We have to wait until she gives us the clearance to proceed up the ladder."
"Dammit, Ino, I hate when you're right," Sakura grumbled out. Here she was stuck submitting documents of missions she was prohibited to participate in onto the encrypted database, famously known for its un-hackable reputation, of Konoha Firewall. A stupid, stupid website that was only accessible by the top tier of agent leaders.
This was probably as exciting as her life was going to get. Privileged enough to access a highly secure database their fellow enemies killed themselves for and yet unable to wiggle herself into getting a mission.
Ino had a point though. Ino's father was the lead torture specialist; he knew how to manipulate a manipulator and make him do his bidding. Being an only child and her father's little princess, had its cons for the blonde girl. Her dad was not going to let any harm – or boys – come to his baby girl even if she was already 23 years old.
Worst of all, Sakura had Tsunade as a legal guardian.
After her parent's death, she had learned all kinds of things. First, her parents were undercover spies working under the busty blonde spy famous known across the black grid as code name Slug. Or Slug Princess when she was younger.
Tsunade was the worst parent anyone could ever ask for. She was too overprotecting, too temperamental and almost never sober. She had taught Sakura self-defense and when she had mastered every technique with flying colors, Tsunade had taught her more and more until Sakura knew everything there was to know.
Tsunade had been so impressed that she had considered taking Sakura on missions. Stories of capers, hunting down bad guys, restoring robbed paintings and pieces of history filled her young mind back then.
She had been a little less than thirteen back then, but the next second, her mentor relented. She had looked at Sakura a little too closely and shook her head with tears in her eyes.
The storytelling had stopped after that.
Sakura knew Tsunade felt guilty for her parent's deaths. That was why the blonde had taken her in when she was found shaking the earth at the scene of the crime that night.
They had formed a bond of trust and security that night. Tsunade loved her like her own daughter which was why she wasn't allowed to volunteer herself at the age of eighteen to officially join recruitment.
This was also why Sakura herself had not pushed the matter; but she wanted to prove to the old woman that she was better than any rookie training to become a spy. She wasn't going to get herself killed; she just wanted to make everyone proud.
"You're squinting again," Ino commented breaking Sakura from her thoughts and bringing her back into reality. "You're thinking about that night, aren't you?"
Sakura's face soured. Ino just had to bring that memory back to the surface. Her mind had been far away from that night, carefully locking it deep down into the recess of her head but now that it was mentioned there was no clemency in trying to push it back down.
"No, I actually wasn't." Sakura offhandedly commented, wanting to scurry from the subject as far as she could. She needed to distract herself and quickly before her mind wandered down memory lane once again.
"Aw, crap," Ino apologized, her eyes wide at realizing her mistake. "It's just, I can't read you anymore like when we were younger Sakura. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to bring it up."
"It's fine," Sakura lied knowing it wasn't; it had been four weeks and one hell of a battle with herself since she had thought back to those events long ago. One glance at the clock and Sakura thanked the heavens for an escape, "It's lunchtime. Let's go, yeah?"
"I feel like getting something sweet," Ino nodded, diving over Sakura's desk to reach her purse in a flash, desperate to change the topic herself and get back into a more cheerful mood.
"I do hope you're talking about dessert," Sakura commented with Ino hot on her heels flashing a tell-tale grin.
